Halloween au brook being just normal brook is so funny to me

Halloween au becomes canon forms:

Luffy: Woa-- why am I weirder than I normally am?? Am I made of mochi or something?? (Katakuri sneezes from somewhere in the distance)

Zoro: Ugh. Mortal.

Nami: I have tits?!?! Nice--

Usopp: *GASP* I'M A REAL BOY!!!!! *remembering how Banchina treated him before VS in this universe* oh...

Sanji:... I don't hurt anymore :')

Chopper: Wait, am I a raindeer???

Robin: *Standing out in the sun*

Franky: *gutteral screaming*

Jimbe: I'm so... Small

Brook: Hey. Uh. Guys?

Dying is cringe

I'm fucking dying

Fruit basket au

It’s cannon that the animals associate with the zodiac are drawn towards that specific zodiac. Like this would affect some more than others, with certain animals being more common to run into mainly (Yamato, ace, Nami, chopper)

Nami got called rat girl in elementary school and beat that kid up so bad she had to be homeschooled

Yamato regularly spooks Ace with snakes because he can and it works every time

Zoro keeps running into tigers regardless of accessibility they just keep finding him and he keeps getting lost trying to bring them back to the zoo

Franky went to a farm on a school trip once and the cows all hid him from the teachers he was missing for 3 hours

God au

Alcohol is made by fermentation. when yeast ferments the sugars in grains, fruits and vegetables

I feel like this could be attributed to usopps doing that humans later discovered and cultivated. (Like usopp made it but humans made it better)

Alcohol Is technically poison - it becoming all that other stuff was mostly Sanji and Chopper and Franky taking it out of his hands

God au

In the god au did shanks roger and Finn go fight in wano? Because they all new and where friends with Odin.

Nope, they were all kids back then and then Roger died and none of them were safe enough to help anyone because they were being hunted for being on Roger's crew

God au

What if Jinbe gave each god a sea animal as a symbol of there friendship

(Usopp got seals; a reference to selkie au)

Usopp getting seals is so adorable actually they're all so mischevious--

Sadly Chopper handles animals, if Jimbe ever gave Usopp a gift it would be a rabies shot

On a scale from 1-10 how bad do you feel that your selkie au has know made it, so when someone sees a seal, the instantly think of your AU? Like feel bad for catpi, imagine seeing a seal and instantly thinking of usopp or god forbid buggy.

(-10)/10 I cannot be in everyone's walls but this is the next best thing I am a plague to one piece enjoyers and I will be until they rip my blog out of my cold dead hands

God au

While stereotypically only criminals worship us up, that’s not entirely true. He is very commonly worshiped amongst gardeners.

Nope - poorer and middle class folks have gardens for food or medicine, so they thank Sanji or Chopper, upper class gardeners worked hard for their education in botany and since luck with gardening is more in being attentive, knowledgeable and patient, they mostly thank Robin and consider manipulation of plants by their own will as besting Usopp and the plant's own will to overtake or be overtaken instead of staying in the neat little rows and sections the gardener makes

Nomads worship Usopp, they reject reliance on agriculture, tend to rely on wild plants for game and shelter and medicine instead of the refined kind Chopper and Sanji tend toward. They worship Usopp for being nearly everything they rely on, everything they see and touch

(God au, also sorry for asking when I already got my ask answered just a bit ago but this au has got me in a choke hold)

head cannon

So why do I feel as if Zoro didn’t care for humans until he was taken to some random festival by Franky and tasted what humans called “alcohol”

after this he started going to a lot more mortal partys

(Don't apologize I'm happy that you like my au!)

To be fair, Zoro in every universe is pretty focused so it isn't a surprise he wouldn't have much interest in human affairs when humans were at peace, as bad as it sounds. He didn't like humans, they did war but they did it wrong, dishonorably, with cunning that Zoro refused to see as anything but an unwillingness to be strong. So Zoro supervised their fights once a year and paid attention to those who came out on top, but he didn't stay for the festivities after.

Then alcohol started appearing at the festivals - it made humans stupid and strange and unable to fight so he had no interest in it. Then Franky challenged him to a drinking contest, and Zoro was against turning down any sort of challenge so he accepted.

Now he can be found at every festival drinking towns dry

God au

Headcannon

When franky first emerged, his very existence hurt usopp. (Think the industrial revolution, causing massive pollution, and environmental damage.)(this is a reference to water 7 when him and his family beat usopp up)

OHOHOHOHOHOHOHOHOHOHOHOHO

Yeah Usopp started getting a lot more creative with his plants' defense mechanisms out of spite for humans (mostly having plants that look almost identical to other plants, but also some... Larger carnivorous plants) because Usopp wasn't a fan when they were first created (mostly because the only humans that ever went to him had cruel intentions: murder, rape, war, betrayal, destruction, and Usopp to give them the cunning to do it, all Usopp saw of humans was their cruelty to eachother, and everyone and everything around them)

For a while, the humans could only fight back by learning to spot differences in poisonous vs not poisonous, by cutting away or burning dangerous plants they knew or overtaking them with agriculture. And for a while Franky hated Usopp and every other god that made the harsh conditions his humans had so much trouble surviving. Robin had so many intelligent species to guide, she helped where she could but humans were Franky's and his responsibility alone, he blamed himself for how few natural advantages they had, he hated himself for being the smallest and youngest of the gods.

So when he and his humans finally worked together to make power of their very own, electricity, he started using it for everything. Anything could be warped into something he could use, torn from the ground and melded into something new. The gods owed him, he thought, they did not give his humans power so they would take it from them.

And yeah he did go a little mad with power but the gods knocked some sense into him, and then Luffy and Usopp made the devilfruits so humans Could get a 'natural' advantage

Neheheheheheheheh >:3

Reblog if you love sea dogs

Myths and gods au

how would zoro feel about Odin and his death.

The Kozuki family always had a lot of respect for both fire gods - and they Might be one of the reasons Zoro and Sanji are always depicted as a man with two heads (whoops) and as Wano developed they disregarded the sun god more and more, under the understanding that the sun was made of fire and thus Luffy was just a middle-man, and secretly because Luffy also stood for freedom, diversity, adventure, and all-around giving don't-close-the-border vibes. Oden ended up winning one of the tournaments for Zoro's war festival, but then when Zoro came down to bless him Oden refused that blessing and demanded Zoro bless all of Wano instead. Zoro said no and then got Sanji because charity was his department. Oden demanded Sanji also bless Wano. Sanji said no, because this guy was obviously just trying to make Wano prosperous conveniently when he became shogun so they would credit him with the blessings. Oden tried to demand they get Luffy down there but Zoro and Sanji just left because a mortal couldn't boss them around.

So Oden said 'fuck it new plan' and started traveling trying to figure out what he could do to bless Wano himself, then he met Whitebeard and Roger and Luffy (Luffy said no) and bla bla bla canon canon canon

Zoro didn't actually hear that Oden died for a few months at least, but when he checked the gladiola it was vibrant red so obviously Oden went down fighting. He does feel kind of bad in hindsight that he didn't check on Wano but Oden was only remarkable to Zoro in his skill and his audacity, and mortals tended to die.

Later, when they free Wano, Momo asks the three to bless Wano, they all said no again, because Wano would only be successful if the Shogun made it's blessings

The big mom pirates after fingering out zepo was a selkie after big mom killed him.

One of big moms kids: so we’re all in agreement. We can never let her find out about this, right.

The rest: yeah, she’ll probably kill us.

Yeah she'd need comfort food and her comfort food is her own children sooooo

(I know you don’t ship it but I find it funny)

Usopp: did you f- my dad.

Shank: what?

Usopp(about to cry): did. you. fuck. My. dad.

Shanks: What do you mean? I.. uhh..

Usopp: Did you fuck my dad red hair shanks. Did you fuck my dad. Did you fuck him.

Snanks: no..I..

Usopp: Did you fuck my fucking dad! Did you fuck my Dad Shanks. (Bites his neck)

This is mid-reception for Usopp n Luffy's third wedding actually

DeAged au

How did Barto react to baby versions of the og 5 and chopper

Barto goes through a factory reset for abt 90 seconds and when he comes back to Luffy has climbed on his shoulders to yank at his weird hair, Sanji is poking him with a stick to test if he's dead, Nami took his wallet and his knife, Zoro was in the middle of trying to steal one of his earrings, and Usopp is aiming Something at him. He's not entirely sure what it is

So Barto might explode a little

day 5 of lusanlu week, scars (can i also count it as worship?? maybe) !!! I DID IT!!! FUCK YES

Selkie au

How dose big mom react to law having like 20 selkies?

Screaming crying throwing up immediately goes with her eldest children to seize Law's entire ship and by seize I mean she literally picks the polar tang up out of the water like a catfish

If they get away she will taddle to the government but for now she wants all the selkies