Tarot Reading - For T - 18/10/20

Romantic/Social Update

Where you are / What you Have / What you want

Six of Grails / Two of Grails Reversed / The World

In our first position for 'Where you are' we have Six of Grails, and my first thought here is 'The calm after the storm'. It hasn't always been easy but you're in a place now where you know yourself a little better and you're ready to look to the future. Often related to our inner worlds and a sense of equilibrium and peace the Six of Grails is a receptive but contented card - ready to take what she's given but not in need of any outside influence. From past readings I'd say you've moved in a very positive direction, you seem happier in yourself.

I think this card is who you are on your best days - looking out with interest and wonder at what's to come, but not with need or desperation. Content with your own company without requiring the validation of others, which leaves you able to interact with people as an equal rather than feeling like you have to please people to be tolerated or liked.

This makes our second position, Two of Grails reversed, unusual and almost counter to that message but my belief is that it's there to serve as a warning. The Two of Grails reversed is often a sign of inner discord, insensitivity, jealousy, disloyalty and betrayal. Here I think it's reminding you not to fall into old habits - Should you choose to pursue someone (or have someone in your life already, it's unclear) you need to be careful that you don't allow yourself to backtrack on the progress you've made in the last two years. Be wary both of falling into unsavoury habits and of blindly dismissing them in your partner. Nobody's perfect and as such it's important both to make sure we're always the best we can be and to avoid putting others on a pedestal where we may be blind to their flaws - which is bad for us because it allows us to be deceived, but also for our partners who will feel unseen and unloved in the shadow of an idealised version of themselves.

There's a lot packed into this card but the summation here is that you must be sure you're viewing everything with clear eyes. Don't let your judgement be clouded by visions of what you want to be true, work with what's in front of you for better or worse and you'll find a path that allows you to stay true to yourself.

In position three, 'What do you want?' we have a simple answer. Everything. This isn't a bad thing, but it is an expectation that needs to be managed. Striving for perfection is admirable, but punishing yourself or others for failing to meet it is counterproductive at best and actively harmful at worst. The world is a journey taken to it's conclusion, in romance this will probably mean a long term life partner. You're looking to find that perfect balance of emotional fulfilment. The feeling of 'yes this was Meant To Be'.

Together the picture I'm getting is that you've come to some measure of peace with yourself and your place in the world and now that you're more settled within your own mind you're again reaching out to make a connection. There's nothing inherently bad in this, in fact it seems good and healthy, but you need to manage your expectations and remain vigilant. It would be easy for you to fall into the trap of looking for someone who is an absolute perfect match and, upon not finding them, try to change yourself to fit someone else's shape.

That said I'm not saying you're unready! Far from it, the cards seem to be trying to give you what you need to find your way. Stay true to the sense of self you've developed. Have standards and ideals, but remember that you're human and nobody will be a perfect match. Great relationships, ones that really stand the test of time, are built not found.

Remember you're looking for someone you can grow with, not someone who's already finished their journey. A likeminded person that you have a rapport with. I get the impression it may be someone you already know, or at least move in similar circles to. You're definitely NOT looking for someone you'll 'go out and find' as much as opening up to the potential already in front of you.

Energy Reading - A - 17/10/18

The banks of a dark body of water, somewhere between river and swamp. The moon hanging overhead, heavy and full, bleaches everything - Clear shades and softened outlines. 

There is an island in the middle and I'm sitting on the bank feet just shy of the water, half sunk in the soft mud with the branches of something akin to a weeping willow dappling the light from above. My white socks are stained up the back of my calves but the soles of my feet are clean. I did not walk here. 

'Awake?' 

A voice, soft and androgynous. Shifting on the very precipice of masculine and feminine, rather than falling into neither category.

Laughter.

A man in black with an antique silver cane to match his pocket watch. He smirks, lopsided tophat wobbling faintly as he nods to me. 

'You know me Love.' 

I do, do you? It's not a name he uses for me. I brush the edges of my dress, as if I could make myself presentable, and he squats next to me. 

'Louisianna?' 

I wouldn't know, I've never been. He's laughing at me, as if it should mean something. A log on the river opens an amber eye, a crocodile after all, before slipping under the waves. When I turn to ask if he had seen it I see the same eyes staring back with a sharp grin. 

'Did you forget I was dangerous?' 

Never. But not without reason, and I have given no offence.

Why are we here? As I wonder I become aware of someone else on our little island. White-clothed and glowing, pristine and untouched by the mud around us. I think he is pale under the glow. He is unknown to me, and dangerous despite his calm appearance. 

I question now whether I know the first or see his image to encompass a concept. 

You have an angel and a devil on your shoulders, as it were, and they each appear as the other. 

Chaos and Order. 

One would have you build a world for yourself, the other destroy the one that does not suit you. 

There is a tension here, masked in calm though it may be. You must choose one. The choice is fully yours, there is no wrong answer, but make your decision wisely for they are not as they appear. The route that seems kindest will leave a trail of destruction in it's wake. Know the cost before you sign the pact.

Tarot Reading - For T - 22/09/18

For Personal Growth

Work on - Find hardest - Reward

Two of Skulls Reversed - Hanged Man Reversed - Ace of Scepters

For our first card we're looking at what you need to work on most. The key point to bear in mind for the rest of the spread. We've drawn the Two of Skulls Reversed. This can mean a lot of things. Lack of balance, contradictions, and the need for new perspectives. It also reflects uncertainty, grey areas where we would want to see black and white, and inconsistancy. Worry and argument-seeking can often be indicated by this card, but it's important to note that through it all it also has a strong connotation with change. Specifically positive changes - though being so tied up with the other key words they may be hard to see at first.   Personally, I believe this to be about combining two disparate parts of yourself. The side you see as 'positive' and the side you dislike, that you feel make you in some way unworthy of love and respect. We all have a shadow we see in the mirror, but as the card suggests that reflection can be distorted. Darker than the reality. We see a lot more of ourselves than others do, more than we see of them, and so the darker aspects of ourselves seem out of line with what we would consider the 'norm'. Remember that everyone has a shadow, no matter how brightly they shine. There is no light without dark, morality is not a binary. We all exist in shades of grey and sometimes our dark does the most good. Do not equate the shadow with evil or unworthiness. When we stand and protect something with anger in our hearts we are no less just for our rage. When we let things pass because our kindness prevents us from stepping in we are no more virtuous for our 'light' motivation. We are, all of us, more than one thing. Not easily understood. When you judge the depths of your soul against the surface of another you do yourself a grave injustice. You must learn to face what is in the mirror, understanding that what you see is not what everyone else sees. Learn to separate the two, and pay more care to your own soul than it's reflection in the eyes of others.

For our second card we looked at what you would find hardest about the process, and the card is an interesting one - The Hanged Man Reversed The Hanged Man, in either format, is tied to sacrificing to achieve desires. Reversed it indicates that you are being too rigid, you've lost faith - in yourself or your goal - and self-worth. You're holding more burdens than you should and are refusing to accept the reality of the situation. It can also represent trapping yourself in repetitive thought cycles and false goals. You hold yourself to an impossible standard - one that you have convinced yourself is fair. What you will find hardest if giving this up. You seem to feel that the only way forward is through pain. That if you shed enough parts of yourself, hurt enough and bleed enough, you will be good enough. You tied yourself to this cross, your blood feeds the snake that binds you. Letting go means admitting you were wrong, and that means admitting you made no progress. You will have to see that time as wasted - though later you will be able to look back and see what you have learned. It is easier to push forwards believing something must be waiting at the end than to admit you have bled and cried and torn yourself apart walking the wrong path. Put simply, it's pride - warped - you have put in effort and that has to mean something. You need to take a step back and realise that just because you did not go where you needed doesn't mean you learnt nothing on the journey. You will struggle to take the step back and reorient yourself, and struggle more not to hate yourself for time wasted if you do, but it seems to me to tie in with your first card. When you walk the path of self-acceptance you will find what you seek, but you know it will be difficult. When we hurt ourselves in anger it is expected, it is part of the path to fall and fail. When learning to love yourself you will fall, you will mess up, and the scratches and scrapes will be proof of a misstep not a badge of merit. That's what will hold you back most.

It's a tough read so far, but it looks up with the third card. The reward for all of your efforts will be the Ace of Scepters. This card is focused primarily on creative potential and willpower. Sometimes referred to as The Divine Spark it denotes beginnings and potential - an awakening both to reality as it is and what it could be. It's a card of doing, powered by determination and a love of life. I don't think you could have found a more positive omen if you tried. The path you have to walk is long and hard, but your reward is beyond compare. It sounds trite to say 'a new beginning' but think what it can offer you. The first Ace, the beginning of the whole Minor Arcana - limitless as The Fool with more structure behind it. Burning away everything to clear the way for anything. The Ace of Scepters is the moment of awakening when everything falls into place and you're ready to truly begin. Everything you need is inside yourself, and once you learn to love yourself as you deserve you will have free reign to choose where you go. No restrictions. But that also means no promises. You will have to work for everything you get, there's no yellow brick road to take you to your goals, but how wonderful to have that freedom. Untamed. You've been held back by the expectations of others, and your expectations of their expectations, but when you focus on yourself wholly and completely the whole world opens up.

It's worth noting that two of the cards here are about changing your perspective. This isn't about action, this is about your own will and self-image. I can't tell you to do anything - no 'go travel and find yourself' no 'focus on your family' or 'friends' or 'job/school'. There's no guideline for me to put down. There's advice someone gave me once that I think might help you here, but I can't make you follow it. We've all heard 'be your own best friend' and followed it up with 'ugh' and an eye roll. Think of it from the other way round. That's your friend. What sort of shitty best friend would treat their pal like that?

Review:

I’ve bought three readings from Ember @chance-and-choices and every time I’ve been shocked by how accurate the parts of all the readings describing myself/my situation have been, and she’s always so helpful and detailed when analyzing the cards. She is always able to obtain such a precise, helpful meaning from the cards that gives me the answers or guidance I need and explains things so well and thoroughly that I feel as if I’ve been able to get a straightforward answer from the universe to life questions I have or issues I’m facing lol. I’ve never felt able to obtain such a clear response on my own or from readings by anybody else. I love that she’ll always work with you to figure out which spread would be best for you and your questions, and is so prompt and most importantly, detailed and honest. I feel that I can really trust her - she doesn’t hide or gloss over things and will be upfront about the messages in tarot readings, telling you what you need to hear and giving thorough context and clarification. I’ve gotten so much clarity and peace of mind thanks to her readings and I’m so grateful that she’s there and can help me figure out what to do/how to improve my life when I’m feeling lost or hopeless. I would definitely recommend her readings, if you’re in a good place too, and from my experience she’s been extremely helpful and accurate for every topic that I’ve sought help about - love, social life, school/career, wellbeing and personal happiness, etc

Tarot Reading - For T - 29/04/18

To be Happier and More Sucsessful:

Short Term - Long Term - Kept Behaviours

Two of Scepters - Eight of Knives Reversed - The Devil Reversed

For our first card we're asking what you can do in the short term to improve the situation, and we've drawn Two of Scepters. Twos are about duality, and maintaining an active balance. Choosing to walk the middle line rather than let yourself be pulled in one direction or another; They're at the very start of the minor arcana journey. Seeing all the influences pulling on you and walking your own way without letting them influence you. Finding a way to stay afloat, and preparing yourself for anything that will try to destabilise you. It's a strong, aggressive energy within the Scepters. I would say we're looking at preemptive measures here. Persistence, command and power are key attributes. This card is about embracing what makes us different, and everyone else can deal with it. Capture the essence of fire and burn a path forwards. For you I think this is about embracing this power within you. No matter how you feel about yourself you have to treat yourself well, and make sure others do too. Not in a soft, gentle way. This isn't about pampering yourself and allowing indulgences. This is fierce and angry. 'I exist, I'm here, and I'm worth more than you're giving me.' This is about being ready to tear the world apart if that's what it takes. A warrior's self-love. One step at a time you need to walk this path. Start small if you have to. Even if you hate yourself some days you're going to protect yourself. You don't need others to validate you, and you don't owe them your time if they haven't earnt it. Treat yourself like your own best friend. I'm not saying love yourself unconditionally, that will come with time. I'm talking about the anger you feel when someone hurts your friends; the 'Who the hell do you think you are talking to them like that?' rage, the protective 'You and what army? You want them you have to go through me.' It doesn't matter if you don't feel it naturally; you're going to train it into yourself until it's as simple as breathing.

For our second card we're looking longer term, once you've mastered your step one. For this we have the Eight of Knives Reversed. This feels very linked to me. This card is about feeling held back and restricted. Rigid thinking. Obsessing over the past and terrified of the future. So to me this seems to be saying that once you've mastered the art of protecting yourself you will be able to tackle these issues. Once you know how to love yourself you will have the strength to look into the deeper issues. The Two of Scepters if dealing with the symptoms, once you have them under control you can look into working on the root of your problems. Some you know, some will become clear to you when you stop valuing yourself so poorly. The important thing here is to know that the chains holding you are of your own making. You will have to be the one to break them, once you've learnt how. This will be your long-term project; don't expect it to be easy or quick. One by one you'll face your demons, and you'll overcome them, but you have to be ready for the fight.

Finally we have the card for current behaviours you should keep, and for that we have The Devil Reversed. To me this instantly yells 'resisting temptation'. It's not the most common interpretation of the card but within this spread it seems to be saying that you hold yourself back from things you want. This on it's own is a bad thing, part of what's binding you, but hold onto it. As you begin to bring the power of the Two of Scepters into your life this will be your counter balance. To use Freudian terms, the Superego to your Id. Once you learn to put your own needs first this will prevent you from becoming overbearing or selfish. This is the voice of reason that will draw you back if you start going too far; but don't give it too much power. Right now you allow it to control you. It will be a hard line to walk but only listen to this voice when it's the same strength as your self love. Right now it's drowning everything out; You can only balence it once it's on equal footing. Remember; It isn't selfishness to put yourself first. And the Devil Reversed can remind us that it's ok to let loose a little bit without falling fully into temptation.

Altogether it seems like your key problem is that you're holding yourself back for fear of overreaching. Maybe there's a little voice telling you you don't deserve nice things, or that it would be selfish to put yourself first. Fight it. It's not selfish to look after yourself. And even if it is, who cares? You're not hurting anyone, and no one's perfect. Let yourself be selfish, if that's what it takes. Think about what's important to you; your friends, your goals, your self (and your self had better be on that list), and protect it with every fibre of your being. A Terry Pratchett quote comes to mind:

“All witches are selfish, the Queen had said. But Tiffany’s Third Thoughts said: Then turn selfishness into a weapon! Make all things yours! Make other lives and dreams and hopes yours! Protect them! Save them! Bring them into the sheepfold! Walk the gale for them! Keep away the wolf! My dreams! My brother! My family! My land! My world! How dare you try to take these things, because they are mine!

I have a duty!”

[Chance and Choices]

Tarot Reading - T - 20/04/18

Love Life/Social Life - General

Improve the situation - Blessing in disguise - Beyond your control Lord of Scepters - Prince of Grails Reversed - The Hermit

Our first card here is 'What can I do to improve the situation' and we've drawn the Lord of Scepters. The fire aspect of the fire suit, this is about pure willpower. You cannot wait for things to change, there can be no half-measures. Which also means that there's no nice 'be yourself' or 'try to be a little more ___' message. This is quite simply saying that nothing will change unless you force it. You will not fall into the place you want, you'll have to carve it out yourself and fight tooth and nail for it. 

The Lord of Scepters is bold, dynamic and confident. A leader in every sense he's at the forefront of every battle, authoritative and magnetic. The downside, of course, is that he bears the sole weight of responsibility. If things go wrong, and sometimes they will, he has nowhere to hide. No way to shield himself. But his key point, for this reading at least, is that he believes in himself. Wholeheartedly and without reserve. That's the energy you need to harness. The belief that you are the best you can be, and that it is enough. And the will to make the world acknowledge it.

For our second card, 'What blessing am I not seeing', we've drawn the Prince of Grails in reverse. This is a tricky read, as often his shadow is very negative. My gut feeling on this is that the answer here is twofold. Firstly, an absence of his upright qualities could be taken to imply a calm. As part of the Grail suit he's heavily tied to relationships and emotions. In particular, he's tied to what I would consider to be the more superficial aspects of a relationship - charm, flattery, and elegance. He's a tragic poet type - Hopelessly romantic but with no evidence of any deeper connection. He seems to represent the initial courting phase, to my mind, where everything seems perfect and magical but nothing is yet deep and solid. With that in mind the absence of these qualities, the blessing you're missing, could be that you're on solid ground. The feeling I get is that you're the sort to see the best in a partner, maybe. To fall headlong into the honeymoon phase and feel like the person you're connecting with is your missing half, or somehow completes you. This, then, would be a reminder that currently you're not blinded by these feelings; that you can see things more clearly.Be complete in and of yourself. Secondly, the negative attributes tied to his reversal may be things you need to learn, in moderation, to allow you to harness the energy of the Lord of Scepters. Reversed the Prince of Grails can be selfish and merciless. Ruthless and devious he can warp his charm to bend people to his will, or fly into a rage and cow them. In moderation this can become a healthy ability to put yourself first when necessary. Perhaps the blessing you're not seeing is that some time alone can teach you to love and protect yourself, rather than set yourself alight to warm another.

Lastly we have 'What is beyond my control', and we drew The Hermit. As the name suggests the Hermit is a power that flourishes apart from others, in the stillness of solitude. I'm sure you're gathering already that this won't be the answer you want. The Hermit is defined not by his solitude, but by the freedom he finds in it. Alone and unshackled he finds his way to wisdom, and while he may pass it on to others he always retreats to recuperate. His key tenets are introspection and solitude. These aspects of your life are unlikely to change soon, you must come to terms with them. The Hermit encourages you to turn away from external validation and seek the quiet contentment that can only be found within.

Altogether the message I'm getting is that to get what you want you have to have the will and dedication to enforce your desires upon the world, but you're not in a place where you can currently do that. You need to take some time to work with yourself; As trite as it sounds you need to learn to love yourself. It seems like you're reaching out, looking for another person to fill some void or loneliness you feel, but all you'll be doing, if you manage, is covering up the hole. You can only fill this lack from within, by taking care of yourself and learning to value yourself by more than the people you can keep around you. You need to learn your worth, both the inherent worth you have as a person and the things that make you special. You want to make a deep connection with someone; That person should be you. It's a hard thing to hear, believe me I know. I don't believe 'You need to love yourself before you can be loved' but I do believe, in your circumstances, you're unlikely to make that connection in the first place until you come to terms with being without it. If you run after it you'll only chase it away, come to terms with where you are. You need to learn to be happy alone, complete in-and-of yourself. Otherwise you will self-sabotage any attempts to reach out.

[Chance and Choices]

Oracle Reading - MD - 04/04/18

‘Financial/Job advice’

The Fairy Norn - Other World - Oath

In this reading you asked about three points, so I drew one card for each.

For your first job I drew 'The Fairy Norn - Planning, Patience, and Cooperation' The problems you're having here can be worked through. You will need to have help, but they can be resolved. This may be getting help from a friend or working with your boss to try to adjust whatever is bothering you.

This card talks a lot about simplifying and decluttering. Find the root causes of your problems and organise your solution around that. A lot of what is stressing you stems from this initial problem and until you can face it head on you're treating the symptoms instead of the cause itself.

For your second job I drew 'Other World - Veil, Illness, Transition' Unfortunately, it seems like your second job may not be as stable as could be hoped. I can't say whether or not your position is safe, but I would look into alternative employment either way. You will be better served by a transition here than by trying to maintain the status quo.

A note; This doesn't necessarily mean leaving your job. You may want to consider applying for a different role in the same place or adjusting your shifts.

This card talks about previously stable ground becoming shaky and suspect. You find yourself now in an almost liminal position between where you were and where you will be. What's important here is using the momentum you have to find your feet on the other side.

For the problems made more difficult by your financial difficulties I drew 'Oath - Promise, Pledge, Contract' This, to me, seems to indicate you may have more resources to draw on than what you physically have to hand. Can you approach friends to trade favours, or call in one owed? Or even just ask for help if you've been avoiding out of pride. There are people connected to you that you can draw on.

This card talks about ensuring that your word is your bond, but also making sure it cannot be taken advantage of. Beware leaving loopholes that people may use to take more than was agreed. Be aware of how much you're committing yourself to. 

Altogether it seems like the issues around your first job and the most immediate financial worries are workable so long as you make use of the networks around you. But the caveat on that is that you need to be aware of the intentions of those you lean on. Beware especially people who will ask you for more back. Your second job may or may not be safe, but it isn't the best place for you and it would be prudent to start looking into other options. ------------------------------------------------------------------------

IMPORTANT NOTE:

I am not, and do not claim to be, infallible. Please do not take this to constitute actual financial advice. I am not a trained financial aid, nor do I know the full extent of your situation.  While I hope this helps I would not want anyone to blindly trust their livelihood to what I say.

Energy Reading - MD - 04/04/18

I see an old, empty house.

Detached. 

It seems to be sitting at the peak of a shallow hill, alone with a neglected garden around it. Despite the fact it's obviously been left to go wild it isn't overgrown, and for the most part it seems to consist of short semi-wilted grass. It was clearly once an immaculate lawn, but now it is rough and dry. The flowerbeds at the walls have filled with creeping plants reaching skyward. Not ivy, this plant is one that would flower in the correct circumstances, but similar. It has climbed the smooth white walls and forced its way inside the bare windows.

Inside is dark and empty, but doesn't carry the same air of neglect as the gardens. No dust has settled, and apart from the plants growing inwards there seems to be no sign of damage from it's time uninhabited.

The bones are here, the foundation is strong.

The window ledge beneath the tangled vines is comfortingly cool, pleasant against the skin on your palm as you look out. We're high, and can't see the garden from this angle. The sky is beautiful, a shimmering dark blue with the stars bright and silver. There is no moon, and I cannot see enough to make out the surrounding landscape. A forest perhaps? There are no lights. It's beautiful and peaceful and calm. You expect a sense of loneliness, but it doesn't come.

We're waiting, we're waiting.

It's a sense more than a sound: childish voices, overlapping with echoes of the wind through the house. It almost seems that the house is alive - It's certainly conscious to some extent - though it's unclear if this is inherent to it or the result of something else. Either way there is something deep inside it calling to you.

This place is yours, but you must claim it. No one else can do it for you.

Deep inside something waits for you to open it.

Tarot Reading - W - 02/04/18

General Reading on Growing as a Person

Change - keep - best outcome

Hermit reversed - 5 of knives - Ace of skulls reversed

What you need to change - The Hermit reversed This usually denotes a feeling of loneliness or detachment. Feeling pushed away against your will or unable to connect with others. It is also known to mean that we have cut ourselves off from a problem rather than face it. I feel, however, that it may also be calling on a less common meaning; An unwillingness to forge your own path forward. What all of these have in common is a lack of trust in yourself, a feeling that you alone do not have what it takes to carve your own path forward. You are being called upon to have a little more faith in your own heart. There is no shame in leaning on others when you need help, but don't forget that you are capable of standing on your own two feet sometimes. You're not being told to take a path of solitude, others help us grow, but always remember that you could.

What you need to keep - The Five of Knives Fives are usually a card of adversity, and Knives are the suit of air and thoughts. Because of this my first thought is that you're no stranger to critical thinking. This is good; It's important that you think through anything you're told. Blind trust serves no one unless their intentions are poor, hold on to the part of you that challenges everything you are told. Even this reading. I feel like this card coming after the Hermit reversed may be a warning that people will try to lead you away from your path. On its own the Five of Knives represents an expansion into the higher self, but warns that doing so will upset our balance. It is a card of understanding ourselves, often hinting that old thoughts and fears will re-arise; Now is the time to confront them. Only by accepting our past can we move forward, let go of what holds you back and embrace what makes you you. Embrace the transformations that negative experiences have brought you. Remember that other's cruelty can teach us kindness as clearly as other's compassion. Your virtues are no less from being taught by hard lessons.

Best outcome - Ace of Skulls Reversed Here we're looking at the person you're aiming to become. At first Ace of Skulls may seem an odd fit, it often denotes a lot of negative traits, but when we look closer we can see it as meaning someone who does not need the positive traits. The Ace of Skulls normally talks about new physical beginnings - Money making, rewards; Preparation for all sorts of physical gains. As such I believe this card is telling you that you are capable of becoming someone who doesn't require, or even look for, these things. A person who is stable and secure, and content with it. Often in this day and age we are prone to becoming very materialistic, always wanting more money and gadgets. There is a peace to be found in being happy with what you have. When you are content with your life you are able to see and appreciate all the things that fly past us in the rush for an elusive 'more'. This in no way should be taken as a statement that money or belongings are bad, or that you should live a spartan life, simply that you are capable of being content with your life and having a realistic view of your limitations. You are capable of enjoying everything your life has to offer without letting jealousy overshadow it.

Altogether this seems, to me, to say that you need to learn to love and trust yourself more. Learn to be content in your own company and you will never blindly follow someone for fear of being alone. Be honest with yourself, even when it hurts, so that you can forge the best life possible. Trust yourself, you are stronger than you know. It also seems like it may be a calling towards shadow work. If that's something you're interested in now would be a very good time to look into it. This spread indicates you would benefit a great deal from the introspection and understanding associated with it. [Chance and Choices]

Hey all:

I’m sorry the blog has been a little quiet for a while; To make up for it I’m running a sale of the month of April!

3 Card Tarot Readings, at approximately 700 words each, will be down to half price at $3 a read until the 30th of April!  An example of what this will look like can be found [HERE] and more will appear in this tag as they are ordered.  Everything else is still available at it’s usual price and, as always, feel free to contact me here on Tumblr if you have any questions!  [Services and Tools]

[Reviews]

i didn't ask ember the question i had deep down and or give any context for the reading but her reading gave me a direct answer and she really accurately identified the specific way i felt and the issue i was having. its so helpful how she'll clarify things and tie things together so you can really understand what the cards are saying, and i really liked that she was very honest and explained so well. she gave me the clarity that i really needed atm, i'd definitely recommend buying a reading!!

Tarot Reading - T - 31/03/18

Generalised Love Life Reading

Where you are -What you want - What you need

Daughter of Grails - Ten of Scepters reversed - Ten of Grails

Where you are - Daughter of Grails You will usually see this card as 'Page of Cups', though this deck interprets her a little differently to the norm. She is the earth element of the water suit. She's a little stuck in place here, steady and secure but looking outwards and wanting more. She represents a soft yearning for more than she has - There is no urgency or rush to this, simply an understanding that she wants more and is not yet satisfied. She is often associated with unrequited love, the dull ache of longing for the unattainable. She is often sought after by others but is too swept up in following her own heart to notice them. Often she seeks to understand her own emotions more than she seeks to connect to anyone else. Innocent and dreamlike she enchants those around her, often in an illusory way as they interpret her wandering heart as they see fit.

What you want - Ten of Scepters Reversed Scepters - or wands - is the suit of will and fire, juxtaposed against the two grail cards representing emotion and water, both of which are upright while this card is reversed. This tells us that what you want may be incompatible with both what you are and what you need. Tens usually stand for the completion of a cycle, enjoying the rewards and tying up the loose ends. It seems that you're trying to resist this natural changing point. In reverse the Ten of Scepters often represents a heavy burden or unpleasant duty. Repressing your feelings, oversentimentality, and self-delusion. It can be a very upsetting card to draw, as it often requires us to acknowledge that many of our difficulties are of our own making. Being unwilling or unable to put down responsibilities that were never ours to take on.

What you need - Ten of Grails Back with the upright emotional cards we see that what you need is the healthy closing of a cycle, allowing you to reap the rewards you've worked for. We can only open a new stage in our lives once we've laid the last to rest, and that's what this card is asking of you. Let go of what you're clinging to and revel in what is still yours. This card is associated with a sense of home. Lasting success, emotional wholeness, and the creation of your 'inner kingdom'. There is a strong emphasis on understanding yourself and being at peace with what you are. You might call it 'Inner peace' but 'contentment with the self' would probably be more accurate.

In conclusion here's what it seems to be saying; Currently you're in a position where you're finding fault with some aspect of your romantic life - Whether you're single or simply unhappy is unclear, so I will try to address either - and are looking for more. It is probably not a dramatic sadness, it seems unlikely from this reading that you are desperate to change your situation instantly, more of an empty ache. A wondering at potential futures, perhaps at times leaving you a little blind to the current realities of your life. The most important thing I'm getting from this is that the person you want love from is not your best choice. It's entirely possible you could make it work, but they don't seem to be the best choice. In fact, at the moment I would say it seems that the single life would suit you best. Again, please don't take this as fact; If you truly want something I see nothing to suggest you can't get it, but it seems that you would be best served at this time by taking the time to learn to love yourself a little more. Something we all struggle with and far easier said than done, but it seems from the context I have that currently you value yourself too little. You may be the sort of person to take on too much emotional responsibility for a partner, or who will do all of the work keeping a relationship together and allow themselves to be walked over. It seems to me that by learning to love yourself a little more you will create a better environment for a balanced, healthy relationship in the future. [Chance and Choices]

Hey all:

I’m sorry the blog has been a little quiet for a while; To make up for it I’m running a sale of the month of April!

3 Card Tarot Readings, at approximately 700 words each, will be down to half price at $3 a read until the 30th of April!  An example of what this will look like can be found [HERE] and more will appear in this tag as they are ordered.  Everything else is still available at it’s usual price and, as always, feel free to contact me here on Tumblr if you have any questions!  [Services and Tools]

[Reviews]

Energy Reading - L4 - 25/01/18

Orange, but desaturated. Almost sandy, but the texture is hard. Solid ground beneath my feet, hard pressed and dry. cracks zig-zagging across it's surface like a scream crying out for rain. But look up and oh, the sky is so blue and endless. Glorious like soft velvet underneath your fingertips, bright like forget-me-nots in a spring field. Look up and you could fall forever, never caring. There is a gentle breeze, warm against the bare skin of my arms, and carrying the scent of flowers. I look down and I'm standing in a field, gentle green rolling away endlessly, scattered with wildflowers. I can hear songbirds distantly, sweet and high. But where did the barren ground go? As I question it the gross begins to recede in patches, earth splitting beneath me. The soft warmth becomes a dry rough heat on my skin, and the soft wildflower smell becomes sharp and almost acrid. The fairytale beauty is fading to once again become a barren, arid desert land. The air itself seems to be pulling the moisture from my skin as I stand here, confused but somehow not as upset as I would expect. I knew it, I knew it. These are not my words, they echo around this empty land like lost ghosts. Their vindication protecting them from any other emotion. Not mine, not me. Never ever ever. It makes me question, distantly, which is real. Is this wasteland the truth of the matter, hidden behind a bright glamour, or is the field real? Is the fear of letting yourself believe in something you cannot have preventing you from reaching out and taking what's right in front of you?

There's a gentle feeling at my back. I don't turn yet, fearing that if I acknowledge it it will fade before I can categorise it. Earth. Like a forest, the word 'loamy' comes to mind. The rich scent of turned earth, like a freshly worked flowerbed. Quiet peace, age and potential. I turn to face it, and the world shifts around me. It's darker than I expected, trees stretching high overhead and blocking out nearly all of the sun. Any ambient light comes from the sparse beams cutting through the overgrowth. But it doesn't feel oppressive, rather it feels safe. Like a cocoon, shielding me from the world. I can already feel the wasteland pulling back. I don't want to go but it feels inevitable. I close my eyes and breathe deeply, trying to capture the essence of the place in the time I have. The dark vibrancy of the forest.

There are bushes in the wasteland now. Small and low, barely clinging to life in this inhospitable environment. But glossy and dark, green as the leaves we just left. I can hear songbirds.

This place is only as desolate as you make it. You're throwing everything away for fear of losing it. Maybe it would be pulled away anyway, and maybe it will hurt exactly as much as you fear, but how can you grow from within this bubble you've created? Expect the worse and you can't be disappointed? You know better than that.

This centre, this home base, should be a reflection of your journeys, not a denial of them. Let yourself grow. It may be scary, to turn your back on who you are now, but who you will be is worth it.

Energy Reading - CL - 23/01/18

A dark, hand-like shape reaches for me. Stretching larger than my body it curls to grip around me and I'm falling through the darkness. A single light far above me receding as I drop further and further. My speed seems constant, not accelerating, and the air around me is gentle. Cushioning. There's no wild whipping against me, and no fear of hitting the bottom. The air seems to thicken around me, surrounding me like water and pushing me so I stand upright as I slow to a halt.

It's dark here, with rippling shapes moving slowly in the gloom. Faint glimmers of light come from far above, and when I look up I see the underside of ripples far far above me.

I move slowly through this watery world. Maybe the Ocean, maybe just a deep lake. Any edges are lost to the gloom, but it's eerily beautiful. Every step reveals more to me, even as some is left behind. Muted greens and blues sit amidst the blacks and greys, lending the whole landscape a surreal tinge. The sand beneath my feet is the brightest thing I can see apart from the lights playing above me, but from the corner of my eye I can sometimes see a reflective flash. Something moving just out of sight.

A group of somethings, I think. Mermaids, unless I miss my guess. But these are not the haunting beauties that sailors sing of. Nor the sharp-toothed predators of older tales. Not even the sirens calling men from their course to dash themselves against rocky shores. Though I feel they could wear any of these skins if they chose, these are of a far calmer sort. Older. Their sisters shimmer to light in our myths and disappear again, these are what remains of the core.

There is a watchfulness, not quite curiosity. In fact, I feel very little emotion from them at all. They simply observe, unconcerned and unmoved. Who is this in our domain? What does she want? Why is she here? No rush to find answers, simply acknowledging that they will come with time. I don't fear them, though I sense they could do me harm with great ease. They have no reason to, and it would take a great disruption to move them to it. These are old creatures, they have seen too much of the world to move rashly. Though fearsome when roused they are content to watch the world pass by. All that has come will come again. Again and again, until it is right. Do not disrupt a balance you cannot see.

I see one now, before me in a posture that mimics humanity. Tail pointed down like legs, hands clasped gently before her hips. Her skin blends with the dark greenish water, scales matching. White eyes, too large and too seeing, far apart on her face. Was she waiting for me, or did I stumble upon her?

She was always here, and I always would be.

'Your world moves too fast' she says, calm and contained, 'Shadows spin and flicker, like ripples, and are gone. We endure.'

To endure you must know, to know you must see, to see you must watch. Stillness within is the only way to make sense of the chaos without.

Energy Reading - POS - 22/01/18

My first impression comes from within, rather than without. A darkness, though I retain my form I am unaware of how I distinguish it from the void around me. But in my chest, deep, there is a small sphere of light growing larger. Blue white and cold, for all that it should burn, it expands slowly. It fills me with a soothing, icy clarity. From nothing we come and to nothing we are reborn. It's calm here, a sense of timelessness. A place outside of time, rather than one in denial of it. Only my understanding makes this place linear, my focus creates order where otherwise there would be none. Not through any strength or effort on my part, simply that this place is usually unobserved and is incomprehensible without this translation. Like a photo that turns a three-dimensional scene into a picture on paper, this understanding does not reflect any true change in the subject. Only grants a way to look at it.

The power in my chest, or the power I have focused on in my perception perhaps, seems to have birthed small flecks of light from itself. Like cold embers floating from a fire, though I see no movement in them. They are a still image, moving when I turn my focus away. It's dizzying to be in their midst, unsure of their scale. Do they float like glitter a hairsbreadth from me, or burn like stars a million lightyears away? Does it matter? It does, it does. But why? Everything matters, in this space before time. This time before space. The chaos that created everything, before the universe imposed order. Before there was a universe, or order to impose.

It seems that I'm perceiving the precursor to the beginning, through my own mortal lense. But why? Learn. The energy existed before it had form, before it knew what form was, and it exists still. I feel a silver thread of it through myself. Through you. All of us connected to this moment, this not-moment.

This space-not-space is liminal. Can it be a moment without time? Can it be peaceful before it knew disruption? It seems that it can, but how much of that is what we bring with us to the void? What matters isn't what would be without you, but what IS now that you're here. You were born of the universe, body and soul. Stardust and chaos. Preordained and free. You are, as you have always been, a constant and irrefutable part of everything. You are a link in the chain, a single thread that leads back to the start of it all, that will lead on to the end. Everything you are has always been and always will. You reach to find your place, not seeing you carry it with you wherever you go. You predate the birth of the universe, you are woven of the same thread as the gods. Don't forget.

Your power is what you make of it. Glimmering fragments in easy reach or colossal power stretched far? Only you can decide that, and either way - it is yours.

Energy Reading - FK - 19/01/18

Green. A high view of lush rolling hills leading to a cliff face, dropping sharply into the sea. The white, chalky rock dazzlingly bright in the sunlight, matching the frothy tops of the waves crashing against it. Small, but fast and plentiful. The sea moves dramatically, back and forth in an almost playful manner, but powerful with it. Only a few shades deeper than the clear sky above, unbroken from the horizon to the blinding white disk of the noontime sun. This place is freedom, vast and limitless, and I see it through the eyes of a bird. Some form of hunting bird I think, a Falcon or an Eagle maybe. Set loose from the arm and free to wander, perhaps, though no man stands to await my return. In the distance I see a small herd of horses, shades ranging from mid to dark brown. Powerful beasts running at sheer gallop just for the joy of it. My eyes, sharp and high, can see no end to this place. To them it must be truly endless. Far from the cliff, and the danger they cannot see, they move like the wind. The speed must feel wonderful, to throw yourself forward with no barriers and charge ahead instead of watching from afar. A sadness seeps into me, and the sky seems to darken in turn. Bright blue fading to an almost grey cloud cover, dimming the sun. All this freedom, and I'm jealous of those I share it with. Nothing stops me from flying with the horses, I know I could keep up. I could even be faster. And I see the sea, blue and endless and dangerous, but beautiful from above. I can do more than them, go further. What holds me back? Fear? The belief I shouldn't? No. It's simpler than that. I'm so busy not doing it I haven't got time to start. A strange thought, as I hang in the air. I could do so much. I could. I could. I could start any second, I could start right now. There's nothing stopping me. Why, I could do anything I wanted. Yet here I stay. The horses have gotten closer while I was distracted, slowing from a gallop to stop beneath me and look up. Their eyes are wise and sad. Pitying. That riles me in some distant place, but it cannot pierce the foggy feeling in me.

You cannot run, and so you will not fly.

Give us back the sun.

The sky clears, and so does my mind. A single thought is clear to me, more than any other. Someone is waiting for me.

They cast me forward like a hunting hawk, and I have strayed too far. Without purpose, I've become lost and resentful. I must go home.

He waits patiently, he who taught me to fly on my own wings. I saw the world, vast and beautiful, and now I long for my home. The secure warmth of it. But more for my place in it.

It was not the horses' freedom I was jealous of. It was their purpose. They ran free because they were supposed to, wild and flighty and unseeing. I was made for different things.

I was made to find, to seek, to hunt. To carve my place into the world. This idle freedom is beautiful, and soothing, but it is not a home for my soul.

You were made for more than you allow yourself, as you watch others move in ways you don't. You know your place. Claim it.