reblog and make a wish! this was removed from tumbrl due to “violating one or more of Tumblr’s Community Guidelines”, but since my wish came true the first time, I’m putting it back. :)

Evil Khaled

You stupid You very stupid We the worst You a dumbass You untrustworthy I don’t fuck with you

im not crying you are

Daughter tells her Dad he’s going to be a Grandpa [x]

someone: yeah i had a crush on them and turns out they liked me too so now we're dating

me: ......okay......that sounds fake but okay....

IVE MET A SEX OFFENDER ON THE APP TINDER AND IM WARNING EVERYONE IN AND AROUND AUSTIN TEXAS OF THIS MAN. I CONTACTED TINDER AND THEY REFUSE TO TAKE ANY FURTHER ACTION. PLEASE REBLOG THIS SO THAT OTHER GIRLS CAN STAY SAFE FROM THIS MAN. HES TERRIBLE.

If you DON'T LIKE pineapple on pizza, reblog this post.

And if you DO like pineapple on your pizza, reblog THIS POST.

I’m doing a census on this ongoing argument please help it’s obviously important. 

I love locking my door like…you’re not coming in lmfao

chocolate vanilla swirl with cookie crunch flakes

what will future historians do with this 

WHEN SOMEBODY TELLS YOU THAT YOU AND THE PERSON YOU LIKE WOULD BE CUTE TOGETHER

he’s literally giving out signed lean cuisines i want to scream 

holy shit this is so spot on.. wow

The signs as zodiac signs

Aries: Aries Taurus: Taurus Gemini: Gemini Cancer: Cancer Leo: Leo Virgo: Virgo Libra: Libra Scorpio: Scorpio Sagittarius: Sagittarius Capricorn: Capricorn Aquarius: Aquarius Pisces: Pisces

the signs as girlfriends

💞aries💞: always laughing and joking with you. playful smacks on the arm and always wants to wrestle, but whines if she gets hurt even though she started it. always looks at you in this special way that makes you feel like you’re on top of the world. jaw kisses and butt touching. 💞taurus💞: literally invites you over to nap with her. wants to do the simple things with you, like taking baths together and falling asleep in the same bed. buys you lots of gifts and brings you food home anytime she goes somewhere. 💞gemini💞: always wants to go somewhere amazing. she wants to go places and see things with you. has her arm around your waist all the time and has this airy laughter that you could never forget. 💞cancer💞: very domestic. she wants to cook for you and do your laundry and wants you to live with her a month after you start dating. the warmest big spoon and always kisses your forehead. she loves to watch movies with you and just spend time together. 💞leo💞: you two can have fun together anywhere. she wants to go to walmart in the middle of the night just to run around and laugh and hold your hand. loves kisses and pda, she’s always showing you off because she’s proud of you. lots of dates and cheap thrills. 💞virgo💞: the girlfriend that’s like your best friend. she always wants to hang out and watch tv, and she’s always got something to talk about. probably organizes your room for you just because it’s driving her nuts and hardly mentions it even happened. loves to sit in your lap and talk about the world. 💞libra💞: sappy romantic. she loves traditional dinner dates and when you buy her roses. she celebrates valentine’s day like it’s fucking christmas and she loves to buy you gifts. always kissing your knuckles and telling you she loves you. 💞scorpio💞: she loves to spend time with you more than anything. tons of just hanging out at your house and watching netflix and talking about your feelings. she loves to cuddle and she’s always dtf. very playful and loves to mess with you. 💞sagittarius💞: the type of girlfriend that always wants to go sightseeing and hiking. always dragging you along by your hand because she moves so fast. she always has something to talk about and loves to kiss your cheeks. 💞capricorn💞: she’s always in the mood to cuddle. she’ll give you long hugs or random passionate kisses to tell you she loves you. always telling you things like “be careful” and “drive safe” and brushing your hair out of your face. always telling you about her big ideas and plans. 💞aquarius💞: your best friend above all else, she wants to do everything with you. always surprising you with gifts and dates and loves to jump into your arms. the type of girlfriend who’s happy just to have you around and doesn’t care what you’re doing. 💞pisces💞: super sweet and always wants your attention. she’s always touching you somehow and telling you about the random stuff she’s thinking about. loves to hold your hand and nuzzle you, and hates sleeping without you.