caldineens - Tumblr blog

caldineens · 28 minutes

Text

Drabble Drabble

Forever not good at posting my recent drabbles here, so today here is around up of my last four Fergus POV drabbles that I have shared on Twitter over the last few weeks.

2x04 Experience Milady was running late, and Fergus was getting anxious. He and Murtagh waited outside of L'Hôpital for hours, the bright afternoon sun having long given way to a moonless night. Milord had given him the tremendous responsibility of ensuring Milady made it home safely, in time for the party, and Fergus desperately wanted to prove himself worthy of the task. His time with them feels tenuous, like at any moment, he will be sent back to the too small closet at Maison Elise. But he cannot return there, having now experienced the thing for which he longs for the most.

2x05 Comfort After the chaos of the night and Milord being arrested, an eerie calm had fallen over the house. Milady paced the room, stress and anger lining her face, neither of which were safe the bébé, according to Milord. Knowing it was now his responsibility to protect her, Fergus gently took her hand and guided her to the sofa. “Sit, Milady. Think of the bébé,” he said. She gave him a small, tired smile as she sat down. Fergus sat besides her, and placed his hand on top of hers, hoping it provided her as much comfort as it provided him.

Hope 2x06 They arrived home in the early hours of the morning, tired but excited that they successfully spiked the Comte’s wine. Fergus followed Milord upstairs, both of them quiet so as not to disturb Milady. It was still strange to call this place home. To have a bed of his own. To have people that depended on him and found joy in his presence. Milord bade him goodnight, leaving Fergus alone and suddenly overwhelmed by the life he never expected but could now never give up. He was meant to be theirs, and he could only hope they believed that too.

Broken 2x07 It is his fault. He let himself get wrapped up in the possibility of being a family. Milord, Milady, the bébé…and him. For a moment, it seemed as though his dream, once foolishly outlandish, was on the cusp of becoming real. He let himself believe and now, incomprehensible devastation has left him unable to dream of anything but the agony he rendered upon them. As the carriage arrives at L'Hôpital, he clutches the flowers tighter in his hands, unsure if Milady will want to see him. But maybe just a glimpse of her will remind him not all is lost. Maybe they can be broken together. Without hope but with each other.

And a reminder you can find the first chapter of my new fic, Time Comes in Roses on AO3! (https://archiveofourown.org/works/56191129/chapters/142745668)

Happy reading!

15 notes · View notes

caldineens · 31 minutes

Text

Thanks human...

826 notes · View notes

caldineens · 54 minutes

Text

152 notes · View notes

caldineens · 55 minutes

Text

Love her voice 🤩🤩🤩

37 notes · View notes

caldineens · 59 minutes

Text

THEM as Jamie and Claire 🔥🔥🔥

232 notes · View notes

caldineens · 1 hour

Text

https://santajamie.tumblr.com/post/662814080498794496/baby-video-part-2

SIS deleted this video from the Internet when they claimed they didn't believe in Heughan babies anymore. The babies do exist. This video was made sometime after Boo 1 was born.

I'm tagging a few other bloggers whom I think will appreciate this.

@odessa-2 @diggsydogquee @auburncurlslass @mrsd79 @mrsfraserheughan @mariaae @dillon7fan

#sisbabytheory #babytheoryvideo

906 notes · View notes

caldineens · 2 hours

Text

ROMAN GLASS CINERARY URN WITH HANDLES, 1st/2nd century

53 notes · View notes

caldineens · 2 hours

Note

What a small universe it is that sorrounds Sam in Outlander. Rosie Day, Shauna MacDonald and now Kieran Bew.

Si, eso demuestra que sabe cuidar de sus amigos. Rosie era Mary Hawkins, Shauna Macdonald era Flora MacDonald y para quien no sepa quien es Kieran Bew, su personaje es bastante secundario, es el marido de Faye Thomas, fotógrafa y amiga de años de Sam y Faye además, fué pareja de Luke Neal, también íntimo amigo de Sam junto a su hermano Neal. Todo queda en casa.😎

Yes, that shows that he knows how to take care of his friends. Rosie was Mary Hawkins, Shauna Macdonald was Flora MacDonald and for those who don't know who Kieran Bew is, his character is quite secondary, he is the husband of Faye Thomas, photographer and long-time friend of Sam and Faye, and he was also Luke Neal's partner. also a close friend of Sam along with his brother Neal. Everything stays at home😎

35 notes · View notes

caldineens · 7 hours

Text

https://santajamie.tumblr.com/post/662814080498794496/baby-video-part-2

SIS deleted this video from the Internet when they claimed they didn't believe in Heughan babies anymore. The babies do exist. This video was made sometime after Boo 1 was born.

I'm tagging a few other bloggers whom I think will appreciate this.

@odessa-2 @diggsydogquee @auburncurlslass @mrsd79 @mrsfraserheughan @mariaae @dillon7fan

#sisbabytheory #babytheoryvideo

906 notes · View notes

caldineens · 7 hours

Note

Hi CB, do you think pap walk was a stunt by Starz powers that be? It feels Ike they want the spotlight off S by giving him a bad rep so the new actors of the prequel can be focused on? It was odd that S waited so long to post OL day. Would he go to these extremes for a possible sighting in a park without any pics? This reminds me of the questionable pre-Hawaii pap walk, similar in tone, always felt like Starz picked Bunny, not Sam.

I think Hawaii was a combination of something initiated by Starz/Sony and the overlap of unfortunate timing and rapid escalation of the pandemic. I also think he and Cait were headed for Japan right after grabbing a quick portfolio of Hawaii pictures that could be released over time, but Covid shut that plan down. People tend to forget but that was the scariest time in most of our lives. Combine that with emotionally-driven (poor) responses by Sam, Cait and even fans because we were all dealing with something we'd never had to deal with before, where everyone we loved was at risk of dying.

I don't think this has anything to do with the prequel, that would be dumb on Starz' part, even more so since they have to demonstrate profit on their own now. They need the Outlander fans including the S&C fans to drive additional interest in the prequel and not unsubscribe. Subscriptions are the only things that drive revenue. Turning off OL fans (many of whom are already turned off by the promo free Droughtlander and the bullshit promise of a supersized season 7) puts far more risk on the prequel. They need happy and engaged OL fans. They need people to want to see what happened to Jamie's parents and Sam is Jamie for all intents and purposes (and there are some out there where that line is very blurred).

The delayed S7 teaser may have been deliberate or it may have just have a simple explanation. His recent picture feels like a deliberate response to something. Combine the delayed posting with the ridiculous pap walk though and it feels like Sam's version of cutting his hair.

That driver of all this may be a thing we know about or it may not, we only see 5% of their lives and even then only what they want us to see. But whenever their actions are so obviously staged and phony, there has to be a reason. Yes, there are those casual fans who will take it at face value and won't ever know who she is. There are those paper shippers who fall apart at everything. There are antis who will try to ride it to their advantage but deep down also recognize the fakeness. And then the rest of the fandom will dissect it for days with reactions ranging from ambivalence all the way to freak-outs and everything in between. They.count.on.that. It's why I wondered out loud yesterday if the obvious staged and phoniness of it is just as much of the strategy as the classic Walk, Pic, send to JJ was. The dots always eventually connect so the answer may not present itself for awhile, if ever.

But man, the tell-all would be quite a tale.

75 notes · View notes

caldineens · 7 hours

Photo

Jamie 1x06 “Rent”

425 notes · View notes

caldineens · 7 hours

Text

Little Bit Better Than I Used To Be

Catch up: Chapter 1 (Starry Eyes) || Chapter 2 (Save Our Souls) || Chapter 3 (Dancing On Glass)|| Chapter 4 (Merry-Go-Round)|| Backstage (1) || Backstage (2) || Chapter 5 (Danger)|| Backstage (3) || Chapter 6A (Love Walked In) || Chapter 6B (Without You) || Backstage (4) || Chapter 7 (Stick To Your Guns) || Chapter 8 (Time For Change) || Backstage (5) || Chapter 9 (Take Me To The Top) || Backstage (6) || Chapter 10 (Home Sweet Home) || Backstage (7) || Chapter 11a (Nightrain) || Chapter 11b (Nothing Else Matters) || Chapter 12a (Handle With Care) || Chapter 12b (I’m So Tired of Being Lonely) || Chapter 13a (Angel) || Chapter 13b (She’s My Addiction) || Chapter 13c (Patience) || Chapter 14a (Where Do We Go Now?) || Chapter 14b (Where Do We Go Now?) || Chapter 14c (Where Do We Go Now?) || Chapter 15a (Dreams) || Chapter 15b (I Sing A Song of Love) || Chapter 15c (You Can Do This If You Try) || Chapter 16 (Let That Feeling Grab You Deep Inside || Chapter 17A: Never Tear Us Apart || Chapter 17B: It’s Tough To Be Somebody, And It’s Hard Not To Fall Apart || Chapter 17C: I’m Wishing, Lord, That I Was Stoned || Chapter 18: Turn The Page || Chapter 19A: When You’re Alone, Do You Let Go? || Chapter 19B: Heading For A Spin || Chapter 20A: I Don’t Need Nothing When I’m By Your Side || Chapter 20B: I’m Walkin’ Down This Rocky Road || Chapter 20C: You're The Only One Who Gets Through To Me || Chapter 20D: Together We Can Make It A Dream ||| Also posted at AO3

Chapter 20E: My Main Objective Is To Get You To Turn Your Mind Around

You are in my system Got me right down to the wire You are in my system Help my equilibrium You are in my system…

-- “You Are In My System,” Robert Palmer (1983) [click here to listen]

North Carolina || February 1989

Raymond scribbled on a fresh sheet in his notebook. Absently running his hand through his hair. Clearly thinking.

“All right,” he said, after a while. “Before I walk you through my plan – I need to ask you something. Both of you.”

“Anything,” Claire replied instantly.

“I need you to commit to this. To therapy. To getting better and stronger, as individuals and as a couple.”

“Of course,” Jamie breathed.

“Yes,” Claire echoed.

Raymond tilted his head, just a bit. “What I am going to ask of you will be a significant commitment of time and energy and effort. Obviously we’ll need to modify things to account for travel, but you need to agree to prioritize this.”

“Yes, I agree.” Jamie reached across the table for Raymond’s notebook. He flipped to an empty page, wrote I commit to Raymond’s plan, signed his name and wrote the date. He pulled back to let Claire sign her pledge and name as well.

“You don’t know what you’re agreeing to yet,” Raymond said quietly.

Jamie met his skeptical gaze. “It doesn’t matter. You’re here for a reason. I – we – want your help. So whatever you recommend, I will commit to doing.”

“Me too,” Claire added, pushing the notebook back across the table.

Raymond cleared his throat. “Well then. On typical days I’d like to have three sessions. Half an hour with each of you individually, and then an hour with both of you together. With the individual sessions taking place before our group session.”

“We can definitely do that.” Claire gripped Jamie’s hand on top of the table. “What do you think?”

Jamie nodded. “Yes. We will make it work. This is important. And you’ll of course be available if we need more time?”

“Definitely. To the extent you want time with me, I will make myself available. Nobody else – not your bandmates, Colum, not anyone on the crew – will be a client. I will quite literally be on call for you, 24/7. Jamie, if you start to have a panic attack, I don’t care what time it is or where we are, if you’re comfortable with me being there then I want to be there to help you.”

“And to support Claire,” Jamie added. “I won’t put all of that burden on her. It’s not fair to her.”

Claire squeezed her husband’s hand.

Raymond pivoted to face Claire across the table. “And Claire – I’m here for you in equal measure. I know you’re still adjusting to your sobriety. And I doubt you’ve worked through all of the trauma associated with your ex-husband.”

Claire swallowed. Jamie pulled her a little closer.

“So – if it ever feels too much, and especially if you start feeling like you’re losing a sense of yourself, when you’re so far away from home, and so out of your element…I want you to come to me. I want you to talk it through with me. And when you’re ready, we can talk with Jamie about it.”

She nodded, grateful.

“This goes without saying, but I’ll need you to continue to be as honest and open with me as possible. Our therapy isn’t going to work, otherwise. I’ve had clients in the past who struggled to be honest, and it ended up undermining their recovery. Especially the addicts.”

Claire poured a fresh glass of water for Raymond. He drank it all at once. Clearly choosing his next words very carefully.

“I will never judge you for anything you do or say – about your past or present selves. But the more you share, the more I can help you. And nothing you say to me will ever make its way to anyone else. Not Colum, not Ian and Angus, certainly not the crew. Definitely not the press. I’m bound by my professional code of ethics. And of course I’d never put you in that position.”

“Thank you,” Jamie breathed. “I want so hard for the most important things in my life to stay private.”

“But,” Raymond added, “If something comes up in one of our individual sessions that I think would benefit being discussed in our group session, I hope you’ll give me your permission to raise it. You’re already very open with each other, which makes my job easier. But I’m sure that both of you have things you haven’t told the other person about. So, I want you to know that if I bring up something one of you told me, in the presence of the other person, it’s purely because I want to get to the heart of a topic. To prompt a fruitful discussion.”

“I’m all right with that. I want to get better.” Jamie looked at Claire. Raised their joined hands to his lips, for a kiss. “I want us to get better, and stronger.”

“All the more reason to be honest with each other, and with me. Because as my favorite medical school professor told us – honesty has room for secrets, but not for lies. Do you agree?”

Jamie and Claire nodded.

Raymond smiled kindly. “I am so glad to have this opportunity to help and support you, at such this pivotal moment in your lives.”

Jamie laughed. “Don’t thank us yet. See how you feel in August, when you’ve been on the road for four months and you’re in bumfuck nowhere in Scandinavia and the blackout curtains won’t work in the hotel so that you can sleep.”

Raymond flipped to a new sheet in his notebook, smiling. “I’m going to recommend you do something, Jamie. Earlier we were talking about how it’s good to get a little separation sometimes.”

Jamie nodded, curious.

“I’m suggesting that you go out to L.A. in two and a half weeks, but on your own, with Claire staying here. She may fly out, let’s say, the final week. Or maybe not at all. What would you think about that?”

Jamie pursed his lips. Jaw clenching.

“I know why you’re suggesting it, Raymond. But…”

Raymond let the moment stretch. Watching, with Claire, Jamie process his thoughts.

“I want to say, no, I’ll never agree to that. I can’t go that long without having Claire with me.” He dropped Claire’s hand and crossed his arms.

“Why?”

“Besides the fact that I’ll miss her every second we’re apart? Because when I’m on the road, and doing industry stuff, and playing gigs, I know I’m going to see the things that I’m addicted to.”

“And you’re afraid that you’ll slide right back into that life, if you’re by yourself?”

Jamie heaved a deep breath. Raymond watched Claire hold herself back from giving her husband even the gentlest, most reassuring touch.

“Do you think he’d do that, Claire?”

She shook her head. “No way.”

Jamie huffed skeptically. “You have too much faith in me.”

“You should have more faith in yourself!” She stood, hands on her hips. “You’re so much stronger than you give yourself credit for, Jamie. Why don’t you see that?”

He covered his face with his hands, breathing deeply. “I know what I can do, Claire, when I lose control.”

“So do I, Jamie. But I know what you can do when you keep control. I know what you can say no to. Do you not remember that party in New York? It was hard, so fucking hard, but even though people were drinking all around us, and that model was doing coke two feet away from you,you were fine!”

Raymond kept his voice steady. “Do you really believe that at the drop of a hat, you’d forget your vows to Claire, Jamie? That you’d forget your commitment to sobriety?”

He nodded.

“But that’s never happened.” Claire lay a calm hand on Jamie’s shoulder, squeezing. “And just because I won’t be right next to you, or in the hotel room waiting for you, doesn’t mean that you will forget your promises.”

She rubbed his shoulder, so gentle.

“And, Jamie – to be honest, I could use the time here. To get to know the people at the clinic a bit better, get to know what kind of support they need. Obviously I won’t be around when we’re in Europe, and maybe not even after that if I come home pregnant. But I want them to get to know me, and I want to get to know them. And the best way I can do that is by spending time there, on my own. I can’t do that if I’m in L.A.”

Jamie pulled back to look up at his wife. She smiled down at him, pushing his hair out of his eyes.

Raymond gave them a moment before speaking. “When I suggested you go to L.A. alone, Jamie, you mentioned how you would feel, but you didn’t mention how you thought Claire would feel. Does what she wants not matter to you?”

“Of course it matters to me.” Jamie sounded a bit hurt.

“But you didn’t use those words to say that,” Raymond replied. “And you didn’t ask her what she thought about my idea. Claire does have a life beyond being your wife. She’s trying to find her footing. And she needs more space to do that. Has she ever told you that?”

Jamie looked directly at his wife. “Not like that,” he said softly. “Am I being too selfish?”

“You can be, sometimes.” Claire took a deep breath. “I know we’re both still healing, and figuring out how we live our lives together when everything is so complicated. This life we have together – it’s so wonderful, but it’s also so overwhelming. I want a family with you, Jamie – but I also want my career back. I know it won’t look like it did before, and I don’t want it to. And not right this instant, maybe not for a few more years. We have time to talk about it and figure that out.” She smiled at him. “That’s why I’m so glad that Raymond is here. Because he’ll give us the space to talk about these things.”

“Creating that space helps. So does re-framing a situation.” Raymond shifted in his chair. “Consider this: instead of feeling loss that you’re not together when Jamie is in L.A., or being afraid of what the world is like without the other…think of it as, two or so weeks of building new memories to eventually share. Two weeks of anticipation, to the buildup to being back together.”

“I like that,” Jamie said quietly. “And I see what you’re doing, Raymond. Turning something that could be negative, into something positive.”

“He’s not wrong, Jamie.”

Jamie sighed. “I know, Claire. I need time for me, and you need time for you. But I’ll still call you every day. Probably annoy the hell out of you.”

She laughed. “Of course you will. I want you to.” She turned to Raymond. “Can we start our sessions with you while he’s in L.A.?”

“Of course. We can do it all over the phone. But we can start tomorrow, if you like.”

Claire turned back to her husband. “Raymond asked us to be honest, Jamie. So when you speak with him, be honest. And when we have our session together, be honest. This is why we need his help. If you feel like you’re cracking, you need to fucking tell us. Do you understand?”

Jamie nodded. “I love you,” he rasped.

“I love you,” she laughed. “It’s just a few weeks, Jamie. Then we’ll be in Europe. You’ll get sick of me.”

He laughed, and it transformed his face. “Not possible.” He turned to look at Raymond. “I think you’ve got your work cut out for you, Doc.”

Raymond closed his notebook. “Well, you two will certainly keep things interesting.”

50 notes · View notes