I am a fraud...

I have always considered myself a blunt person. But by blunt, I always considered that to be honest but with age, I have learned those two things are not mutually exclusive. I can be blunt and have not filter saying what is one my mind like most babies look like aliens to new parents, calling me “sweetheart” could lose one of their favorite body parts to old white men or breakfast for dinner is morally wrong during your friend’s brinner party. I have said many so many things, that the taste of my foot is certainly second nature to me. Saying what is one your mind sometime does not make an honest person.

I lie all the time. No, I walked my dog today. No, I ran into traffic and that’s why I am late. No, I am happy at my job and it doesn’t make me cry every other day. No, you not showing up to my Friendsgiving didn’t hurt my feelings. No, I am depressed to the point where the only reason I get up in the morning is to make money for my dog. 

I want to be this honest, real person that I have always dreamed to be. Acknowledging I have a problem is the start. Rome was not built in a day but here is to trying to be the girl in my dreams. I can be better.

Beginning...hopefully

I have a lot of thoughts and somehow a lot of feelings even though I try to diminish both so it does not attracts attention.

I cannot always express thoughts and feelings to others. So here I am on here trying something new, which is not like me. I am a commitment-phobe that has ever lived up to her potential or really have found her passion in life.

I have always loved writing, even though I may not be grammatically correct or Hemingway. So here I go writing out into the universe hoping to feel more and find some real passion in my life. 

My goal is to write at least once a week. It can be absolutely anything. I need to grow out of my comfortable plateau that I have slowly created for myself.