bkdkink
Izuku's a chia pet
I do arts and write!| NO REPOSTING | More active on Twitter! @bkdkink
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for any new alnst fans here's a quick synopsis of everybody
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"i shouldn't have been so harsh on her"
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Recently my partner sat me down for half an hour to go through alien stage frame by frame and I came out of it a little emotional don’t touch me
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Part 6
Lastly, finally, the performance. Till appears, but he doesn't look like himself. Without the usual energy, without the sharp and challenging atmosphere around him. Just an empty, irritatingly resigned shell of the person who used to be so resilient.
At the beginning of the mv, we are shown how much he is suffering(experiments? torture? calming drugs?). Mizi was gone from where he could see and on top of that he was going through all of this; what was the point? The only source of comfort he had was gone. He has no reason to fight, no reason to continue—he's so painfully different from everything Ivan knows. He seems just a shadow of what he once was. Melancholy and exhausted. His hair is tamed, he's wearing the clothes he should, he has shoes on and his sharp gaze is lifeless. Till was not acting as Ivan expected. He wasn't being aggressive. He wasn't fighting. He wasn't doing his best.
Ivan didn't anticipate that he would act like this: not long ago he was releasing because he was physically fighting with an alien. In that moment, he was still him. As Ivan himself said in the interview, he expected aggression. This apathy, this melancholy... Ivan didn't expect it.
As the song unfolds, Ivan thinks about their story. He thinks about everything he's ever done to be by his side, from simple things like watching him draw to more intense things destroying the flower crown. And he thinks about how he is right next to Till as he acts in an unrecognizable, new, and terrifying way. New in a completely opposite way to the new he wanted to escape with. Till looked strange, and this must have slowly but surely caused Ivan despair. His scores were higher, but Till seemed too distant to care. He wasn't caring, and he was going to die.
He continues singing and glances at Till—he doesn't return the look, nor the song line. Ivan had to deal with what he had been ignoring all along because of the hasty belief that Till was still going to act competitively. He had to face, in the few minutes they were on that stage, that the consequence of winning would be losing. The consequence of giving his best would be to have Till taken away from him. He had to reflect on what he said to Sua and how those words came back to haunt him because Till couldn't die. Not while Ivan lived, and he knew it. And look where those words and his actions led him.
Till had officially given up and stopped singing. Ivan notices and seems to decide something. In the heat of the moment, faced with so much despair, so much confusion and so much anger, he throws the microphone on the floor.
Desperation, because Till was about to die before his eyes. Confusion, because that behavior was not typical of him. Anger, because he gave up and because he wasn't being himself. He wasn't being brave and stubborn. Anger, because he wasn't doing his best against him, because he wasn't caring about their round. Because he was no longer dignifying him a single dispute. Because, after so many fights between them, this is the one he decides to give up on. And Ivan doesn't accept it. He doesn't accept that Till gave up. It's not how it's supposed to happen. Ivan has to give him a reason to stop acting like this. He has to instil something strong in Till, something that makes him react. He has to fill his tank with anger so that he reacts at any cost, so that he does something.
Ivan walks towards him with only one certainty: Till won't die on that stage, he will. It's a hypocritical sacrifice, he acknowledges. Still, he is better than Sua. She was loved and her death caused Mizi irreparable harm, trauma and pain. Till didn't even look at him. In the short time he decides what he's going to do and feels everything he felt, he regrets being so hard on Sua. Now, he understood. Letting Till die was not a viable option.
He rests his hand on Till's face as Till is conscious for the first time, having his full attention. He is acting desperate, looking crazy, but he is no longer confused.
He kisses Till. Without hesitating. He wants to look crazy. He wants to lower his scores. He wants to break the perfect prince facade and reveal himself completely out of control. And most importantly, he wants Till to know. He wants to show everything he never showed, express the feelings he suppressed until they exploded like that, at that moment, on that stage. Most of all, he wants Till to understand. This is the only and last attempt to explain without words(they were never his specialty, anyway). "That's it. That's what everything I did when we were kids is. That's what everything I did and do with you means. That's why I stole your things only to give them back later. The reason why I picked on you. Why I always followed you, always freed you. I acted in a way that wasn't good for me, nor for you. I was never like Sua was for Mizi for you, but thank you. Thank for putting up with me. Thank you for being the victim of my shallow emotions.".
But Till is still unresponsive. He tries to pull him away, but it's not strong enough. He isn't fighting.
He remembers what Mizi did to Luka and begins to choke Till to provoke even more reaction from the audience that still remember that disaster. He doesn't even let Till speak. Not with the intention of killing him, but of saving him. And it works.
Gratified and relieved, he gives one last, simple and true little kiss on Till's lips. A reward for Ivan, a celebration of his victory. It's quick, Till doesn't return, but Ivan is happy anyway because the scores were reversed. He did it. Till is the one who will live, therefore Ivan won.
Till closes his eyes and Ivan is shot for the first time. It hurts, but it's not enough. It was just on the shoulder. He's made a decision and he's going to take it to his very grave. Another shot. Not yet, he can still stand. He needs a little more.
Until, finally, blood starts flooding his mouth.
He realizes that this is it. He's really going to die. This is the end of him and he feels fear.
But it doesn't take long for him to realize that this isn't the end for Till. A sickeningly sweet smile, a look of "It was worth it" or "That's good. You're safe" blooms across his face.
Losing strength, he lets go of Till's throat. Till's eyes widen, surprised and scared to see him bleeding and falling. Ivan falls to the ground smiling because he got what he wanted, and dies smiling because Till is alive and finally looking at him.
Part 5
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please look at this picture junji ito drew of his moms crusty white dog
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Great news everyone. There was a kitten wandering in the drive thru at work and my inner warrior cats kid tried to be a hero and capture him.
I have now suffered multiple puncture wounds and have to go to the emergency room.
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