ummmm just dont scroll too far

google slut strands for men now i beg of you. there's this forum of guys telling each other their little hair/mustache wispies are sexy. peace and love on the planet earth

google slut strands for men now i beg of you. there's this forum of guys telling each other their little hair/mustache wispies are sexy. peace and love on the planet earth

cats be like why "come here" when i can "go there"

i had an interview yesterday and they asked me what the last competition i won was and i had to laugh for three straight minutes as i tried to explain neopets to this unsmiling businessman

i listened to lianne la havas every day this year why is h.e.r. my top listened spotify wrapped

the narrator for the host is so WET. so moist. just. sooo pathetically watery. she's perfect.

stephanie meyer has her many faults, but she does have admittedly great taste in audiobook narrators

some days you just have to listen to your dad talk over rumbling thunder about the trouble he was as a kid and all the adults he came to appreciate later in life for helping straighten him out until the sun goes down on the two of you and you realize you're crying silently in the dark because there's so much about him you'll never fully know and it hurts so so much that one day you'll be here and he won't and you wasted so much of your life not learning everything you can about him

older men really be shooting their shot with me

stephanie meyer has her many faults, but she does have admittedly great taste in audiobook narrators

babygirl i wanna inflict psychological atrocities upon ur dnd character

apparently my sleep medicine provider is in a lawsuit for illegally monopolizing their $2,000 product i feel so much vindication

i really thought the eyebrow piercing would push me past "look at that sweet cishet woman!" into "i wanna call them a fucking slur" territory but the old folks in the drive thru lane still loved me today so i must be doing something wrong

TODAY A GUY WROTE HIS NUMBER ON HIS RECEIPT FOR ME AND I ACCIDENTALLY SEALED THE RECEIPT AWAY WITHOUT COPYING THE NUMBER

well. i can't say i'm disappointed.

THE WHIPLASH I JUST GOT FROM AWWW GAY SPACE LESBIANS TO OH MY GOD NOT SPACE DAD!!!

Dulcinea gives me secretly evil vibes but i love her SO much i dont WANT her to be evil. except i do

THE WHIPLASH I JUST GOT FROM AWWW GAY SPACE LESBIANS TO OH MY GOD NOT SPACE DAD!!!