The back gardens of Willesden.

Wandering around Willesden (1)

dichotomous plants are so weird man. like they’re not even weird it’s the becoming the dichotomous that’s weird. i went to a talk once about a population of strawberries that were accidentally slowly becoming dichotomous and they didn’t even have sex chromosomes, like they had like a bunch of genes across a bunch of chromosomes that did a little bit of sex but not a lot and it added up to one whole sex kind of but not enough that they had all collectively decided to be one sex or the other, so there was still like, a sizable chunk of the population that was producing flowers of both sexes. like they were microdosing it. taking the sex genes for a spin in the strawberry patch

RIP, "The Man of the Hole." We never knew your date of birth or name.

And after what we did to you, we didn't deserve to.

one minute you're at work experiencing stress levels that would kill a full grown horse and the next you're psychologically cold-cocked by someone in your tumblr DMs mistaking you for their 55-year old milf ex-girlfriend named joan and calling you a bitch but promising that he's good for you because he fixed up the plumbing on the house and installed cabinets in the kitchen

When i was in middle school i was banned frm the twilight wiki bc i kept changing Edward’s photo to this

Felt like doing something picture book like.

Hot or snot?

I know I give my pets human names but I also love pets with food names. Not names like Snowball but names like Quarter Pounder With Cheese, Dulce de Tres Leches, Tonkotsu Ramen and Beef Bourguignon.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Croque_monsieur

Deal

i just woke up from a dream where i was being interrogated by a bunch of people asking me if “furbies are kosher” firstly…. im not jewish. secondly……..what the fuck

There are freshly independent possums scattered around my yard like fat little Easter eggs trotting through the grass and bricks at dusk.

CULTISTS! I KNOW I HAVE BEEN AWAY FOR A FAIR BIT BUT THERE IS A GOOD REASON FOR IT. FOR I HAVE BEEN INVESTIGATING RUMORS OF A PORTENT MOST PROFOUND—A HOLY BUCIAN APPARITION! AFTER RIGOROUS QUESTIONING AND TESTING BY OUR ESTEEMED HIGH INQUISITOR, I HAVE CONFIRMED THE AUTHENTICITY OF THIS MIRACLE, AND LIBERATED THE RELIC FROM THE UNCLEAN HANDS OF THE NON-BELIEVER WHO GRASPED IT SO WANTONLY!

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BEHOLD!

HIS BLESSED IMAGE CASTS A DIVINE LIGHT UPON THIS SEEMINGLY ORDINARY KEYBOARD! THE VERY AIR SMELLS SWEET AS BEAVER NUGGETS AND CASTOREUM! PRAISE BUC! PRAISE OUR LORD AND PROVIDER!

FREEESH BRISKET ON THE BOOAAARD 🙏🏼🦫