me: oh man im starving but im not sure what i should make for dinner……

the spirit of a 12th century templar knight that died a horrific death due to torture that started haunting me after i found a sword in the middle of the woods: spaghetti once more, prithee?

me: henry you are brilliant. spaghetti it is

On tonight’s Cooking with Patches: Patches chose to NOT help

America moment

children's media is so evil for pretending broccoli's bad broccoli's literally so delicious and beautiful why are you being so mean to her i think you're just jealous honestly

I bought this expensive ass yogurt as a gift to myself so that I could make little candles in the tiny terracotta pot it comes in and it turns out it is the best, creamiest, most buttery heavenly delicious yogurt I have ever tasted and I’m now addicted

snarkybutdelish

If you've ever been disappointed by dragonfruit, especially if you felt like it tasted like nothing, then I'm like 90% sure you had unripe dragonfruit, which tastes like nothing. There's a small window of time where it tastes amazing. You must have the patience of a hunter. Do not strike until your prey is at its most delicious

Scream

How it started/how it's going, baking edition :v

I'm curious. Reblog this if you know how to cook

I don’t even care if it’s macaroni, ramen or those little bowls you stick in the microwave. Please, I need reassurance that most of the population on tumblr WOULDN’T STARVE TO DEATH if their parents couldn’t fix them food or they couldn’t go out to eat. 

My sort of maybe embarrassing “late to the game” thing I’m learning now is how to tell if oil has gone bad.

I feel like most other foods have obvious visual tells like mold or they end up smelling foul and obviously bad. But I was googling about oil and the internet says “if it smells like crayons, it’s bad” which would not have been my first guess. And I tested it out on my somewhat old sesame oil and was like “by god, I would describe this as smelling like crayons”

Anyway protip if your old oil smells kinda like crayons it’s probably no good 🖍️

how to solve your potatoes from sticking to the pan

are you trying to stop your potatoes to sticking to the pan? follow these simple pro steps to prevent potatoes sticking to the pan. easy to follow steps to not have potatoes stuck to your pan! [AD] potatoes have been sticking to the nonstick pan for centuries. here's how to unstick stuck stick potatoes from your nonstick pan. try adding more oil to your pan! add oil and they will stick less to your pan. using a nonstick pan also helps this. [AD] potatoes still sticking to the pan? try these other hacks to stop sticking pan potatoes. even pros do them! potatoes stick to pans in no small part because starch is sticky. consider using potatoes with lower starch, or a pan with lower starch. [AD] [AD] consider you may be using too much oil? consider using less oil in the pan, as it can make potatoes stick to your pan. potatoes can stick to the pan even in the microwave! moreover, these procedures can help to prevent potatoes sticking from your pan in the microwave. [AD] potatoes have less starch after they are cooked. add potatoes to pan only after they have been fully cooked. this can help sticking to your pan. now that you know how the pros do to stop potato from sticking to your nonsticking to your pan, consider How To Stop Onion Sticking To Your Pan

why must it always be 'peppering'. why can't i salt my lover with kisses. paprika my lover with kisses. 3 tablespoons chili powder 2 teaspoons ground cumin 1/2 teaspoons oregano my lover with kisses

Little old Italian lady: Do you have zucchini?

Me: Yes, right here.

Lady: Is how much?

Me: $2.99 a pound.

Lady: It's usually $1.49.

Me: Yes, in the summer.

Lady, pauses, then grabs two: I put it in a soup.

Me: Oh nice, what kind are you making?

Lady: You will not fantasize about my soup.

And then she walked away. "You will not fantasize about my soup" will be in my head forever. I love you, little old Italian lady.