what i think ab u today

hai deva, apa kabar? sejauh ini pemulihan kamu udah 100% total sembuh apa belum? kamu makan yang teratur ga? pasti teratur ya hehe. aku disini baik baik aja tapi kalo soal makan.. hehe. terus juga, aku tiba tiba kepikiran kamu gapernah liat swku apa nomorku ga di sv ya? kamu udah lupain aku sepenuhnya ya? apa aku bener bener udah gaada tempat lagi di hati kamu? in really really inside ur heart? sakit. kamu keren dev! udah lupain aku sepenuhnya, sedangkan aku? aku masi berharap kita bisa balik kaya dulu. kamu masi punya tempat yang special juga di hati aku dev, kalo ditanya cape ga? ya jelas cape banget dev. cuma gimana, gabisa diapa apain. aku udah terlalu sering mencoha melupakan kamu sepenuhnya tapi lagi dan lagi hanya kamu yang ada di otakku dev. please don’t be in love with someone else dev.. aku mohon. i beg u to not in love or in relationship with someone. it’s hurts sm dev, really. i really beg u dev. please okai? just wait for me.. okai mybad ab yesterday “mau jenguk” that’s bcs im too confused.. im so sorry dev. but believe me, istg i really wanna jenguk u. but too much question in my head dev. uh alr.. im sry really sry dev. um and.. remember again, im always here if u need me okai? i love you in every universe deva bagus pramudya. ❤️

About You

"Do you thing I have forgotten about you?"

I know a place. It's somewhere I go when I need to remember your face. We get married in my heads. Something to do while we try to recall how we met. Do you think I have forgotten about you? never.

You and I were alive in my heads with nothing to do, I could lay and just took in your eyes. Wait, and pretend I don't get hurt with this all lonely feelings.

Hold on and hope that we'll find our way back in the end. It's the same damn thing that made my heart surrender and I miss your tan skin, your sweet smile while u looked at me, your smell, your big hand in my small hand, your voice, your jokes, your cold attitude, your adorable attitude whenever we meet, so good to me so right. And I never know what to think about. I miss you so much dev. How dare you come to my dream and just left me like you do irl. I'm so angry!

You left me like that again, and I can only cry in your fucking long-last shadow left me. I hate you but I can't.. im too dumb to hate you because I already deep in love with you. it's 2023 and I still wish we can go back to the past I mean we can be together again like in the past, but better version. Istg if you comeback to me I swear I loved u right, so please comeback to me l'm begging you dev.