When was the last time you hung out with your friends?

Heavens, it’s been forever… I’d really like to see them again for tea. I mean, I can’t exactly have tea anymore, but it’s alright.

I think the next time I see Jekyll I’ll have to tell him he was right about Lycanthropy and Vampirism. He’s going to be a smug little shit about it but I’d rather him be right than bitter at me.

You mentioned keeping your vampirism a secret from your family. Are you married or do you have a partner who is unaware?

I unfortunately lost my wife a long time ago, and I only have my daughter and my son and his family, as well as my three grandchildren.

I haven’t really spoken to either of them in a while, so that’s all good. Besides, it’s more my friends I’m worried about knowing. Specifically Jekyll and Utterson.

Ugh. Hyde is on here.

Not going to bother to read through his blog (I’m lying) as it seems he has no interesting drama going on (also a lie).

How do you avoid sunlight while living your double life?

I cover every inch of skin I possibly can while still being recognizable. I cary an umbrella with me and wear a wide brimmed hat. Mostly, I stay inside my office. Most of the windows are closed except for the largest one and I use a lot of lamps. I use the excuse of getting migraines while working, so too much light makes me feel nauseous, and everyone seems to respect it.

I’ve been burned on accident here and there, but it heals up alright. Feels like a normal sunburn but a hundred times worse. Plus the burning causes a small fire to start on your skin and clothes, so you get burnt by the fire as well. It sucks when I can’t put it out and end up having to leave the room and dump water over it.

Never become a vampire after 40, kids. That’s the worst time to do it because you’re more prone to accidents like that.

Fine. I don’t see the harm it would possibly do to tell you.

I had known them for a little bit after they had come to my clinic for treatment of third degree burns up their arms. To my understanding, it was from sunlight exposure. I was a bit flabbergasted, since Jekyll had been doing a lot of talk on clinical Lycanthropy and Vampirism, and I thought it was all utter tommyrot. It was shaking to see a real vampire right in front of me. They did all the little tricks that vampires are usually written doing like turning into a bat and showing off their sharpened canines, so I certainly believed them then. Though I did need a long sit down and a cool rag to the temple.

They came in regularly for treatment and as soon as they were all healed they suggested we talk over a good bottle of wine some time.

I drank heavily and listed to them serenade me with stories of their adventures and accomplishments, as well as their own research. They somehow ended up in my lap as I encouraged them to drink from my veins, getting quite dizzy and almost at the brink of passing out. I vaguely recall musing that it would be nice to be a vampire and drink as much blood as I pleased, engage in homosexual acts without reprimandments, and follow them along on their misadventures.

So they took the wine screw and made a cut across their neck, offering some of their blood to me as a reward for treating them so kindly. God, it was the sweetest thing I’ve ever tasted. I had my fill and regained my strength, then we had sex right on my couch. Filthiest sex I’ve ever had.~

I do miss them, and I hope we get to see each other again. I would hate for them to have treated this like a one night stand.

Okay, I figured that much out. But, like, did you know the vampire long before that, or did they just ambush you for fun? Are you still in contact with them?

No comment. Next question.

Do you have the same pronouns as the other you?

Indeed! She/He/They. Thank you for asking, dear.

Okay, I figured that much out. But, like, did you know the vampire long before that, or did they just ambush you for fun? Are you still in contact with them?

No comment. Next question.

How’d you become a vampire?

Got bit than drank their blood back. Next question.

Thoughts on the Dr. Lanyon who typically runs this blog?

She’s alright. Someone I’d like to be friends with. Someone I likely couldn’t trust, but he seems nice other than that.

Oh dear, you've changed too.. Well, as long as you're alright, that's fine in my book.

Hello, I'm Dr. Griffin. I knew the you before this whole, well, I can't quite explain it really. Switch? That sounds about right.

Anyways, I apologize for rambling. Please do take care of yourself and if you need anything, I'd be more than happy to lend a hand. Lord only knows whenever it will be my turn to well, turn, heheh.

- 👓

Hello dear! I just viewed your blog and it seems you have a lot of fun with the other Lanyon. Feel free to send messages as you please! You seem like good company!

Take care, Dr. Griffin, and do enjoy the rest of your day! I look forward to seeing you in this universe. Well. That is if I even can.

What exactly did you do to lose your license? Was this before or after vampirism? You sound like you’re having a blast continuing to do so.

I actually didn’t lose my license! Still in practice! Sucking every last drop of blood out of some patients here and there, but I treat and send out most of the others to avoid suspicion. It’s a master plan, honestly. And no bodies aren’t ever left behind! Hehehe, good little snacks for me throughout the day. I think I may be the most well fed vampire in the whole country!

Don’t tell the authorities. No one knows I’m a vampire and I’m still a highly respected person in the medical community. If anyone so much as saw me wearing my vampiric wardrobe, I’d be done for!

yea i'm bi. bi-ting you

uhh… Pizza delivery order… for um… Lanyard..?

I’m sorry, I don’t eat. None for me, thank you.

And I’m not paying.

Were you at the latest vampire-familiar ritual?

Only for a little bit. I had to leave once I caught a glimpse of someone with a face a little too familiar for my liking. It may have just been a coincidence, but I didn’t like the idea that one of my human friends was hanging around all these vampires like a little hors d’oeuvre.

Thinking back on it, I suppose they must have just been a regular vampire with the exact same face as him… Very uncanny, but vampires can shapeshift, so perhaps one of them saw my dear friend and decided to steal his likeness.

Also, Edward Hyde was there, and I can’t stand the sight of him. No offense to Ms. Gray. I hope that he’s a wonderful familiar for her and that they both have a happy existence together.

Umm, h-hello, Lord Lanyon. How did you find this tumblr blog?

Easy. I had picked out odd electrical signals coming from this general area, and I thought it was a spirit or something. Nope. Just this little box.

What fun! It had a tiny version of solitaire and sudoku I can play.

Doctor? Doctor?

Lord, thank you. I stopped going by ‘Doctor’ in certain social circles a while ago. Besides, with my recent purchase of a large estate of land, I’m glad I have this much more befitting title.~ After all, I broke the hypocratic oath, and I don’t think I should be called a doctor when I’m actively harming all in the name of jolly good fun.~

Don’t you dare tell a single soul what I do in private. I need fresh blood to keep coming to me and I need a good, safe cover from when I get home to my blissfully ignorant friends and family.~

Greetings Tumblr; I’m Lord Hastie Robert Lanyon, and I will be documenting my secret life as a man with a double life as a malpracticed doctor and a classy vampire Lord. Please feel free to ask questions, loves.~

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