beautiful! majestic!

the orange by wendy cope 🍊

divine intervention be like

random fire nation diplomat #492 will never understand the complex and fucked up relationship between the water siblings like I do 🙄

everyone say rip kristen 2

Blarmy!

So I’ve been teaching 6th grade since January, and one thing about my female students which made me upset to realize is how many of them are obsessed with skincare. I've heard the girls in my class discussing the EYE CREAM they use. Like tf you mean eye cream? You're ELEVEN!!! I'm a decade older than you and have never even touched eye cream!! The most skincare a middle schooler needs is cleanser and moisturizer, maybe some acne cream. Who tf is selling you all this other stuff? Who tf told you you needed all this?

It hurts me to see. Their brains are too young for these types of insecurities 😭 no 11 year old girl should be obsessed with wrinkles, I wanna beat tf out of whatever tiktoker made them believe they needed skin that perfect

Emily axford you are a gift

You know, Aguefort Adventuring Academy may fail in many traditional areas - student safety, background checks for teachers, faculty deaths - but they are killing it in terms of class size.

Brennan said the class size was just over 500 students - for math purposes let's say 515. There are 13 standard classes plus at least one additional staff member for Dance Bard (there may be other variants but we only know the one).

That gives each teacher about 37 students overall, which gives them 9 or 10 students for each individual year. There may be some transfers/dropouts/deaths but there would also be multiclassing so I feel like it still works.

An alarming percentage of their staff has tried to destroy the world, but damn the level one on one instruction from the non-evil staff is amazing.

emily the muppet

i keep seeing people talk about their bfs/husbands weaponizing incompetence to avoid grocery shopping or purposefully fucking it up. mine doesn't do that he'll shop on his own prerogative like an actually functional adult, his issue is he occasionally brings home a Cursed Item

Beautiful. Majestic. BAM!

"#there's a world where Riz becomes a pirate with Fabian#and his nickname is Riz the Dragoneater" if you ever write this, i will love u forever!!

Aww 🥰 I'll keep this in mind anon! I do think Riz would get back into adventuring after college. Murph has said he sees Riz as a journalist, so I could see him being a freelance writer while adventuring. Fabian and Kristen I think would go right into adventuring professionally after high school, so I imagine Riz joining up with them once he's graduated.

Is it too much to hope that Riz gets a chunk of grandma's hoard?

Like, she's loaded, and probably the new CEO of KVX bank, right? But she's ancient, she might has some archaic idea of her killer earning some of her wealth (if she is ever killed haha).

(If he does, I want Riz take his mom to hell to get matching gold tattoos. And then he gets to go to college.)

also congratulations to riz for being The dragon killer of all time. kalvaxus and oisin's grandmother took that picture together thinking they were hot shit and little did they know centuries later they'd both get absolutely rocked by the same 4'4 goblin teenager with a briefcase and glasses. get fucked losers