adventures-in-instant-ramen
Unidentified Cryptid from Appalachia
•I’m Jo or Bean!••They/She••21•
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people have these “my dog is a democrat” stickers and I like to imagine them with increasingly unlikely animals professing more niche political opinions:
my parrot is a democratic socialist
my arctic fox is an anarchopastoralist
my catfish believes in the divine right of kings
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all goofing aside I genuinely don't understand the urge to reimagine Taylor Allison Swift as a secretly queer icon when the pop music scene(TM) is like. literally overflowing with women who actually like women. Gaga and Kesha and Miley and Halsey are right there. Rina Sawayama and Hayley Kiyoko and Rebecca Black and Kehlani and Victoria Monét and Miya Folick if you're willing to get slightly less top 100. Janelle and Demi for them nonbinary takes on liking girls. like what are we doing here. like I'm not even saying you can't enjoy Taylor but why would you hang all your little gay hopes on her.
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pslsjsj i know theres obviously no reason for logan to bring things up that make him seem suspicious but the idea of him just like casually mentioning weird stuff about his life to a more and more concerned teagan and andy is so funny, just dropping little things into conversation like "oh one of my boyfriends doesnt legally exist", "...when we overthrew the king a couple years ago...", "oh thats my brother thomas. were not twins no i was adopted", "yeah everyone in town was so irrationally scared of me they had a meeting about whether to send me to live in the forest haha" as theyre scrambling to be like cult??? or is he messing with us????
logan tries very hard not to mention things that make him seem suspicious, which makes it even funnier when he does because he honestly didnt know it was a weird thing.
Andy: why are there acorns all over your windowsill
Logan, half-asleep not paying even a little attention: its an offering to deter lightning strikes. what do you use?
Andy: *surreptitiously writes "hippie pagan parents?" on the notebook he carries around*
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the way this is phrased to avoid confronting the reality that people can’t afford food anymore
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Q+A from library visit where I read my comic about a skeleton that plays the fiddle
Kid: Is this fiction?
Me: Yeah
Kid: I kinda thought so
Me: Oh really? Why?
Kid: Because skeletons aren't real
Me: Skeletons are real. You have one!
Kid, jumping up out of his seat: Yeah but they don't move around!!
Me: Your skeleton's moving around right now!
Kid, yelling: THAT'S!! DIFFERENT!!!
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they’re literally everything to me you don’t understand
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game changer tag rn really showcasing the duality of man (creating the tumblr equivalent of conspiracy boards vs everybody do the wenis. the wenis is a dance. everybody is a genius. who knows it in advance)
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“Nobody’s going to want to sit on high-speed rail for fifteen hours to get from New York City to LA.”
Me. I will sit on high-speed rail for fifteen hours. I’ll sit on it for days. I’ll write and read and nap and eat and then do it all over again. I’ll stare out the windows and see America from ground level and not have to drive. I’ll see the Rockies and the deserts and cornfields and the Mississippi River and your house and yours and yours too. I’ll make up stories in my head about the small towns I see as we go along. I’ll see the states I’ve yet to see because driving or flying there is a fucking slog and expensive to boot. I’ll enjoy the ride as much as the destination. And then I’ll do it all over again to come the fuck home.
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Logan and his flash cards deserve to go off the wall, as a treat
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Humanity has finally reached the stars and found out why no one had contacted us. The universe is in a sad state. As such, Doctors without Borders, Red Cross, and many othe charities go intergalactic.
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From the book Organizing Solutions for People with ADHD:
Putting a coat on the back of a chair by the door is fine, but if you prefer, use coat hooks and a large catch-all basket for dropping keys, hats, gloves.
Small bookcase end-table next to the couch to store craft projects, books, and other things being worked on for easy access.
Add a storage unit near the dining room table to transition between eating and working there.
Daily toiletry items should be stored in a basket that you can move easily
Extra toiletries and medicine cabinet items go in open shelf/basket storage so they can be seen and used easily. If items no longer fit, purge the excess. Don’t obscure the view!
If you disrobe in the bathroom, place a tall hamper in there.
Keep a set of cleaning supplies in each bathroom
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It's very funny to me that the stereotypical gelatinous cube is bright fucking green when the monster itself is almost perfectly transparent. Like its gimmick is that it's a monster that imitates an empty 10x10 hallway. How many people have fallen victim to gelatinous cubes because they "know" that the ooze is bright green and so don't bother to check the suspiciously clean corridor in front of them.
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I love season 3 Will so much because he knew Hannibal wanted to fuck him so bad and he used that to his advantage except he underestimated how badly he wants Hannibal to fuck him bro almost popped a vein at the mention of another dude’s name, like calm down he ain’t getting any in maximum security prison and also remember how you have a wife and a kid at home?
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Tumblr: Only neurotypical people do X. Neurodivergent people never do X. It's literally never necessary to do X, and if you do, you are by definition acting out of malice.
Neurodivergent person whose neurodivergence primarily expresses itself as X:
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