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high as fuck and little as shit hehehehehehe
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sleepy baby is sleepy
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“how’s life going?”
me:
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Told another best friend about being a little
Was good. :D
Best friend told me I need sleep because I’ve been so little lately but seep is hard cause all I want is to play games but big me didn’t get small me games on phone
Dumb
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I also smoked weed for the first time the other day and like twice more sense and realized it helps me sleep but also has a side effect of slipping into little space way easier than necessary.
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There’s something super comforting about feeling a cat purring against your foot.
Specially when you’re partner can’t cuddle and sleep so cuddles had to stop because you made them go to sleep because you know they’re super tired
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I just want to slip to relieve stress and finally sleep and hopefully not be in pain for while but I’ve somehow become too stressed to slip and I kinda wanna die.
Also no one here will take care of me because I’m the responsible adult one taking care of everyone else.
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My stepmom made me a candy jar of my own, I bought a new straw sippy cup the other day (I bought a two pack but this one HAS A SWORD ON IT) Featuring: Dumpling, one of my four llama plushies (there’s also Baobao, Boba, and Katsu) But then my stepmom made blt sandwiches and I had avocado on mine :)
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I told my best friend and she was super supportive and told me “and if sometimes you need help getting your straw in your juice box then it will happen” and like “you may be a 25 year old man but you don’t always have to be or act like one” and “you’re a precious it who deserves all the happiness you can stand and then some” and “you’re adorable so it makes sense”
And y’all I’m so happy. I love my best friend so much. I’ve basically been her little brother since middle school and I’m the “baby” of the group anyway. I just usually end up also being the “mom friend”
Aaaaaah
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The hardest thing I’ve noticed about comfortably staying in little space is that I have this loophole where my brain forces me out of little space if anyone else is upset or needs to be taken care of.
I kind of hate it.
I also kinda hate that I feel bad for wanting to tell my friends. Like I don’t think my partner completely understands but like. They’re trying. And I love them.
I just. Want someone else to know.
Because I’ve spent the entire day unwillingly slipping in and out of little space because I have so much shit to do between now and Saturday/Sunday.
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Slipped into little space for a bit today in the middle of a photoshoot and got really fuckin whiny because it was 90 goddamn degrees out and I was in like three layers of long sleeves and a cloak. Not to mention my old binder that is just inconvenient.
I feel like I should tell my other friends because tbh I don’t think my partner really understands. :/
And idk if I have the ability to make them understand.
But also I don’t want my friends to judge me.
...also I want this eczema to go away...
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I haven’t used this blog in such a long time but I just...
I’m having troubles.
Like I kind of discovered that I’ve been subconsciously using age regression as a coping mechanism for stress or even just slipping into a younger headspace when I’m tired or when my partner calls me cute or just...
Idk.
And I should have known a long time ago with all the sippy cups and shit but idk.
I just want someone to understand. Like I have a friend who’s in the same situation but I don’t want to just bombard them with crap every time I feel small. But like. I don’t think my partner totally gets it??? And I don’t want my other friends to think of t as just a kink (because for one, I’m asexual) so I just keep trying not to slip into thst headspace but it feels so safe when I can and I just...
Really like the feeling
But also just aaaaaah.
Like I usually don’t regress back past the age of ten but there are times that like... idk. I just don’t want to take care of myself. I’m always taking care of everyone else and no one ever stops to think maybe I need thst too... :/
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