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tw : you might fall in love

“ But we cannot simply sit and stare at our wounds forever. ”

Haruki Murakami

There's a quote:

"People don't like love , they like that flittery flirty feeling. They don't love love- love is sacrificial, love is ferocious, it's not emotive. Our culture doesn't love love, it loves the idea of love. It wants the emotion without paying anything for it."

,,,makes me wonder if this is why most people don't understand the difference between 'being in a relationship' and 'being in love.' people made it shallow. Love was never supposed to be shallow. if you are in love, you would want it to creep into your deepest corners just for that one person.

"Venere e Cupido" (n.d.), by Artemisia Gentileschi (1593–1653).

“paintings never made me feel”

these pieces:

one last exam today and I am done with this degree in this shit hole of university.

Sit in the sun, run through the rain, remember young love.

one thing i need to start living by is “become the thing that you want” if i want friends who throw themed parties maybe i should start throwing those parties. if i want someone who writes me love letters maybe i should start writing letters for the people i love. if i want to hang out at museums and pretty cafes maybe i should invite my friends to these places. and maybe even then i won’t find the kind of people i want to be around. but then i would have become the exact person i want to be around. and maybe that’s good enough.

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It's just that I belong in the quietest quiet, that's what's right for me.

oh to be a writer and live in europe

— Jay Vespertine; not from a book but from an actual conversation.

"You'll find me where there is peace. Where there is joy. Where there is reciprocity. Where love is pure and nourishes every cell of my being. Where words of protection are spoken over me. Where life is sacralized."

This is where I exist.