whimsicalpoet44
The Whimsical Poet
surviving on poetry & pure spite.
160 posts
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A creative spark…for once.
I keep chasing a feeling I’m not sure exists,
And I’ve felt dead inside for decades,
And I’ve never truly known a mother’s love,
And I stayed in a relationship with someone who looks at me like he hates me when I laugh,
And all I had to eat today was an iced coffee and Adderall,
And I pretend that reading is a hobby instead of a socially acceptable form of disassociating,
And the only person to ever make me feel alive was a crush I had on a boy in high school,
And I flinch when men yell because I think their fist is going to go through the drywall…just like my father’s,
And I like who I am but I don’t think anyone else does,
And I don’t know how to carry all of this.
I don’t know how to carry all of this,
And the shame & embarrassment are threatening to suffocate me.
#prose poetry#poetic#writers#broken#dead inside#healingfromabuse#generational healing#healing#living with cptsd#sad poetry#female poets#adhd brain
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However, I haven’t been idle in this tumultuous period. I’ve been working on a couple of things that’ll help me post more regularly.
A Blog is coming.
A poetry book is coming.
More information about spirituality is coming.
Had to work through the whole fear of being seen thing. 😅 & being okay with speaking my truth when I’ve been one that’s wanted to blend into the background.
I’m getting there.
I’m healing.
I’m trying.
It’s all I can ask for really.
I’ll share this with all of you when it’s time. It’s been a slow work in progress.
I’m just thankful my planets are no longer transiting my 12th house.
But thank you all for being here 🥺💚
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I saw the current & upcoming transits & wanted to cry.
My Saturn Return is in full swing.
*If you have Saturn in Pisces, welcome to your Saturn Return.
Upcoming Saturn Retrograde (in my Saturn Return).
Pluto Retrograde (in Capricorn…my Cap rising and stellium almost cried).
I’m preparing for my node reversal. It’s going to be excruciating. (For me)
My South Node is in the 4th House. I’m in my 4th house profection year. & will be in my node reversal soon. (All cap risings that are 27, my heart is with you😂)
ALSO CHIRON & MIDHEAVEN ARE TRANSITING MY 4th HOUSE CURRENTLY. If I make it out of this it’ll be a miracle😅🙃😂 I really said “give me the most transformative chart.”
Notable Upcoming Dates:
Mercury Retrograde - August 23-September 15
Venus Retrograde - July 22-September 3
Saturn Retrograde - June 17-November 4
Neptune Retrograde- June 30-December 6
Pluto Retrograde - May 1-October 10
*Leaves Aquarius & re-entered Capricorn on June 11th, where it will stay until January 2024.
Chiron Retrograde- July 23-December 26
North Node enters Aries & South Node enters Libra.
*Means a Node Reversal for those with a Libra North Node & Aries South Node.
Not to mention, major themes from 2008-2023 will likely present themselves due to the Pluto Retrograde. Unfinished lessons will likely make their way back around. And I can attest that this is true. Been dealing with a truck load of regret full of realizations about a situation that I didn’t fully understand. This will be more prominent for Cap placements (& Aquarius) & cardinal signs.
Remember the discomfort you feel is for your growth. Don’t fear these transits, but understand they may be difficult depending on your placements. Retrogrades are usually easier for those born under that planet’s retrograde.
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R u still around
Sorta. I’ll be honest (my sag placements laugh in irony) - I plan on posting more when I have the energy to do so. I’m learning how to let go of an incredibly toxic relationship & have spent all my time & energy figuring out how to let go. Ya know…Saturn return things. 🙃 trying to figure out how to be financially independent.
I’ve also been processing a lot of childhood trauma with a very minimal support system.
Im open to sharing more about that part of my life if anyone’s interested (I learn by hearing others stories so I know there are others out there like me).
But I’m doing the best I can rn. I hope to have more energy soon.
Thank you for asking tho 🥺💚
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Why have I never used the app? This is so much more functional. Anyways, got a new phone bc my other one died. So now, I’m accessible pretty readily. Slow but steadily working towards consistency and this was one of the steps.
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Hi, are Venus in the 10th gift givers ? Like Capricorn Venus are
Hello! Yes! I notice that signs and houses share a lot of the same qualities, just in a different way. So it might not be the most outward way you show affection, but it could definitely be a part of your love language!!
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How can we predict when we’ll get married or meet our future husband through astrology?
So, I saw this and immediately knew I had to reply, because this is something I've been looking at HEAVILY.
**Note, I don't believe in assigning planets a gender (i.e. Jupiter/Sun = husband, Venus = wife). I assign them energies, bc we carry both masculine and feminine energies. But use that as you wish. I only say that because I carry a much more masculine energy but appear outwardly feminine. My first marriage partner was the opposite. So use your discernment.
There's no clear and cut way to know for certain and I think this is why I love astrology in a way. Because our placements and transits can play out in a multitude of ways. It's what makes it an art!
But there are some indicators that can hint that marriage may be a theme for your life at a particular time.
**Reminder that I practice tropical astrology. Vedic has a lot more information about this subject and tends to be more accurate (imo) but I'm new to it. Seek out Vedic astrologers to get a better idea about how this can play out in Vedic astrology. That doesn't mean it's wrong in tropical, it's just a lot more vague.
💕 7th House or 5th house profection years can highlight marriage. The 7th house is your house of partnerships/marriage. 5th house is the house of romantic relationships. (Though, I've seen the 5th house linked to the beginning of a relationship or children. However, we have no idea how it could play out individually)
💕 Check transits in your chart from your Jupiter or Sun to your 7th House to see if any of the dates match. This can show you if you potentially met them on a particular day. (astro seek has a good calculator)
💕 Look to your Juno placement. Your Juno placement can predict how you'll meet them. Some argue that it's how you'll meet your soul mate. Others say it's how you'll meet your husband. Could be both. However, I'm more in the realm of it being soul mate.
Side story: When I discovered who my twin flame was, I checked our charts. We're both Cap Venuses. Our Junos were also in Cap. My Juno was in Cap in the 1st house. That indicates love at first sight and it was just like that. We locked eyes and I knew in that moment this person was going to mean something to me. I felt like I 'd known him in a thousands lives. Didn't realize what everything meant until years later. No I'm not married to him (or have ever been married to him) or talk to him, but there's a deeper connection there. There's a lot of complex nuances to this subject (bc twin flames don't always end up together), but I wanted to use it as an example to explain how it can show how you meet.
💕 If your Saturn is in the 7th House, it can allude to the fact that you'll meet them or get married post Saturn Return.
💕 Figure out what planet rules your 7th house. That planet will likely show a positive aspect on the day of the marriage. (i.e. my 7th house is Cancer. Cancer is ruled by the moon. My moon should have positive aspects the day I get married. When I married my first partner, The moon was sextile Neptune. Which honestly makes sense. Delusion that it would be a perfect marriage).
I can share more as I find it out, but this is what I've discovered thus far. I hope this helps!
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Also, can I just say I see my astrology placements manifesting heavily at a new work place and it's fascinating to me. So I figured I'd share.
Neptune | Uranus in the first house: I can FEEL people projecting their ideals onto me. I'm very quiet and hard to read. I see how others are trying to figure me out and they can't, so they just assign assumptions. But everytime I speak, I further confuse them.
Cap rising: My resting bitch face is doing me no favors rn. 😂
Sag Stellium: I'm learning way quicker than they anticipated and I'm full of useless knowledge that aids me in meetings.
11th house stellium: I'm working in matters pertaining to the community. Funnily enough.
Libra Chiron | Midheaven | North Node in the 10th: I'm being forced to work with a team, which is something I've always struggled with. This alone has been the most fascinating placement I've watched play out thus far. Right before my Saturn return too.
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“I am so afraid of disappointing the people I love, I often forget that I am someone I love too. And I need kindness just as much as I believe the people I love do.”
— Nikita Gill
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One of your posts stated u talk Alot about the karma associated to Saturn in the 4th house ppl when someone does them wrong. In what ways are u referring?
Hi! Yes!
So, when I speak about karma, I'm talking about the idea that whatever someone does to you will come back around to them. Or whatever one puts out in the universe will come back to find them. It can be good or bad. But Saturn is often referred to as the 'planet of karma.'
I don't like to use the word 'karma' if I don't have too, because the term has been so severely westernized. So I always like to make that clear. Someone recommended that I use the word causality, which I like.
But Saturn in the 4th can play out by causing trouble with family members (i.e. arguments, misunderstandings, forcing them to work through generational trauma, etc). They could have trouble with self-care or they might not be able to take care of themselves in the ways that they usually do. Their emotions could be disrupted and they might not be able to make sense of them. This can cause a huge disruption in their day to day life. They could have issues with their mother or children specifically. Those are the more general ways this can play out, but you'd know more based off of the sign your Saturn is in as well.
I feel like the 4th house isn't exactly obvious to notice, because a lot of it could be more internal. but that doesn't mean it isn't causing them strife or issues. It's likely causing them a lot of turmoil.
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Thanks for the tag! Doing this for fun.
nickname: Ya know, I don't really have one oddly enough.
sign: Sag Sun, Pisces Moon, Cap Rising.
height: 5'7"
last thing i googled: hahahah my google search history would likely scare someone. Because I'm a Sag stellium. I google random crap all the time. But my latest? Something about the meaning behind 11 degrees in astrology.
songs stuck in my head: Ghosts that we knew by mumford and sons.
no of followers: I honestly haven't checked. I should probably do that.
amount of sleep: Weekends - 7 hours. Weekdays - 7 hours. I'm proud of that achievement tbh. Before, I was only getting like 3-4 hours a night.
lucky number: 1, 17, & 13. (+222)
dream job: Author, Astrologer, Activist.
wearing: Black workout pants and a knit oversized beige sweatshirt.
movies/books that summarize you: The Cruel Prince, The Darkening, Gold, Kingdom of the Wicked, The Perks of being a wallflower, and there's more I'm sure.
favourite song: Can't pick just one, but lately I've been obssessed with Ghosts on the Shore by Lord Huron.
favourite instrument: Violin. I'm convinced I played one in past life.
aesthetic: Witchy | nature-inspired dark academia for decor/vibes/interests. punk and chaotic academia for style/attitude about life.
favourite authors: Holly Black, Octavia Butler, Emily Dickinson (whose like my 9th cousin or something funnily enough. I know it's distant, but I count it lmao), Kalynn Bayron.
favourite animal noise: Meows of cats.
tags: Anyone that would like to participate lol
17 questions, 17 people
I was tagged by @larosezen ! thanks, i haven’t done one of these in a long time ^^
nickname: lisou
sign: libra
height: 1m69 (which makes me 5'6)
last thing i googled: how to convert my height into ft and inches lmao
song stuck in my head: i woke up and instantly wanted to listen to ausgehen by annenmaykantereit (my beloved)
no. of followers: 1 391 (but most are deactivated or bots lmao)
amount of sleep: i had a hard time falling asleep and woke up several times during the night so i have no idea but i guess 6h?
lucky number: none because i don’t believe in that but when i was a kid one of those fortune teller machines said that my lucky number is 7 so i always answer that haha
dream job: diversity manager in a public administration
wearing: my PJs (grey shirt and dark green pants with blue leaves) and a white fluffy robe
movies/books that summarise you: oof that’s a hard question. idk, i’m so me i don’t have the faintest idea what i could answer
favourite song: i don’t have one but for the sake of this post i’ll answer wastin'time by the shoes
favourite instrument: the organ. smh. otherwise i’d say it’s a tie btw… well idk, there are too many great instruments ! the piano, guitar, trumpet, washboard, drums, double bass etc etc etc
aesthetic: a fluid mix of vibrant colors, corporate, urban lesbian and soft comfy cotton. if that makes sense.
favourite authors: i’m only gonna answer one bc it’s a tie btw too many others, except for her : claire mazard
favourite animal noise: don’t really have one
random: i really love roaming in cemeteries, even though i don’t do it enough.
As I haven’t done this in a while, I’m gonna tag a shitton of people! But no pressure, you do you : @thasminlove @pia-writes-things @queerwegian @maikanna @niimuue @imthatqueerkid @profiterole-reads @white-caged-bird @chaoticgoodvixen @graindedune @batnbreakfast @iricolor @jupiterianvampire @tracing-rivers @wolfsnape
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Astro Observations # 4
🌟 Every Sagittarius I've ever met was very good at sports regarding the legs. Particularly soccer, skating, and running. For some reason, they also tend to be strong swimmers.
🌟 People with major Aries and Libra placements together tend to be a walking contradiction. They can simultaneously become enraged while also keeping a leash on their anger at the same time. They're also easily excitable. I love them.
🌟 Chiron in Virgo individuals often are forced to confront their biggest wounds or their health will suffer.
🌟 Gemini stelliums will often hyper-fixate on certain people, but do a terrible job expressing how much those people mean to them. Some will feel loved and others will feel discarded, leading to an abundance of confusion to the stellium individual. It's because they struggle with affection and communicating their intentions with the people around them.
🌟 Uranus in the 1st house | Aquarius risings | 11th House Suns will often manage many of the same struggles throughout their lives. They will be forced to break the societal norm and make their own way in life. It's likely an extremely painful, but transformative experience.
🌟 Capricorn Venus individuals love to express their love through gifts, but not in the way you think. Many interpret that showing love through gifts is because the person doesn't know how to express their emotions adequately. Cap Venus individuals do it because they genuinely care about the person and like to take a practical approach to affection. They want to care for their needs + give them the things they won't buy for themselves. It's a genuine act of love.
🌟 Pisces | 12th House placements can see how everyone affects the world. They understand their impact. They know how much one sentence can genuinely change a person's life and throw them on a completely different trajectory. (i.e. a cashier talking to someone about dinosaurs could peak a child's interest. That child then goes home, googles dinosaurs and becomes obsessed. They later become a paleontologist. That never would've happened if they hadn't heard the cashier say what they said).
☀️ Having your South Node in someone's 12th House indicates unfinished business from a past life. Deep and intricate life changes occur here. Often times, it can end badly, but the person learns what they need to in order to advance forward in life. If the 12th house individual is receptive to the south node individual, they can end up life long friends or have a fondness for each other.
🌟 If your romantic relationship isn't working out with someone, but you have 11th house synastry, it could indicate you're both better friends. If both parties are open to attempting a friendship, it could be a lifelong connection for both of you.
🌟 The reason so many millennials/gen z have issues with relationships is because a lot of them have their Chiron in Libra. This indicates wounds pertaining to relationships. (hence, the toxic dating culture we see among these individuals)
🌟 Individuals with a lot of Scorpio placements tend to struggle with being vulnerable. It often puts them in position where they MUST make a choice - will they embody the magnificence of Scorpio or will they embody every toxic stereotype we know about Scorpio. (obviously, not everyone with Scorpio placements experience this, but the ones with heavy heavy placements)
🌟 North Node in Leo in the 1st House individuals often gain fame just for being who they are.
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Okay, so I think I've figured out a posting schedule! I started a new job and apparently had a harder time adjusting to the schedule than I anticipated, but since things have evened out, here's my plans:
I'll post three times a week regarding various topics.
I'll answer as many questions as I can on the days that I do not post! (As my energy allows)
Thank you for bearing with me during this weird transitionary period.
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2022 Self-Reflection Journal Prompts
Think of this time last year. What's changed? Are you the same person? Why or why not?
What are you most proud of yourself for accomplishing this year?
What's something you wanted to do more of in 2022 that you didn't get to do? How can you make that happen in 2023?
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Happy New Years everyone!! Hoping that this year is full of abundance and luck for each of you!! 💚
My hope is to post on a regular schedule for the new year! So keep an eye out for that!! I've been taking some time to figure out how I can do that in the most beneficial way :)
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Hi!!! How r ya? I hope everything is going well over there!!!
I've got a question about synastry, there is this two synastry aspects that I've been trying to search about it more and more but unfortunately there is not many information about it wich are Vertex conjunct south node and vertex conjunct moon. If you can tell me your POV about i would really appreciate it
Thank you so much for your time!
Omg I'm glad someone else brought this up, because I have struggled to find anything out about vertex aspects that aren't vague. I'm sure in-depth interpretations exist, they just aren't readily available.
So I'll tell you what my interpretation is based on what I know about the signs.
(Like I've said in other posts, I'm using the word karmic to mean unresolved issues from past lives, 'you get what you give' energy, etc. I know the spiritual/religious meaning is a little different, so I just wanted to make that distinction. If anyone has a better term, please let me know! I hate how this term has been westernized)
Vertex synastry is often viewed as karmic connections. Especially with the South Node. The South Node can give you insight into your past lives.
To be honest, in my personal experience, South Node and Vertex synastry has been one of the more successful ways that I've found soul contract connections in a synastry chart. Mine and my partner's were actually pretty spot on. When I read my interpretation with the vague description to him he was shocked. (We always said we were a karmic connection before we truly understood what that meant on an astrological level. This was before my spiritual awakening. Which makes it even more bizarre)
Vertex Conjunct South Node in Synastry
This aspect is extremely karmic. Usually, the two people with these aspecting each other have agreed to help the other grow in this life. The connection can feel instant and it can seem like you've known them in a hundred lives before this...probably because you have.
This union will transform both of you for the rest of your lives. It could be a fated encounter to incite a lot of growth.
There could be some unfinished business from a past life, or you simply agreed to be what each of you needs to kick off some realizations to send you towards your life purpose.
(Some believe this conjunction can indicate twin flames. That depends a variety of things and if you even subscribe to that belief, but I felt it was important to point out)
Vertex Conjunct Moon in Synastry
This aspect can indicate deep understanding of one another's emotions. You two might nurture each other deeply on an emotional and intuitive level.
This can also feel like a fated connection (any vertex aspect will).
However, just because something is 'fated,' it doesn't mean it's always healthy. So don't assume this person is your potential soul mate or twin flame without doing further research. Overall though, this person was meant to instigate growth in you in some way.
I hope that makes sense! I know it's vague, but the house and sign can tell you a little bit more.
***No aspect, synastry connection, or zodiac sign is an excuse for abusive behavior in a relationship. I'm just making this a disclaimer because I've seen other questions/comments about this in various places. Yes, you could have signed a soul contract to help one another, but ultimately, we have free will. So, things might not go to plan. They can neglect their own healing and hurt others, and vice versa. Please do not give someone a pass for this. You deserve better***
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Thanks, will listen to them!💌 We have some songs in common. Love the diversity! In my music list, different songs are sitting together in peace. 😇 Love NF and Avicii. To rec back- Mitski- Pink in the night, Anastacia- Paid my dues, NF- The Search, Tanita Tikaram- Twist in my sobriety, Blank&Jones Dellerium/Rani- Fallen, Doro- Breaking the law(orchestral), Atlus- Mad Hatter rock cover, Banks-Contaminated, Akmu- Hey kid close your eyes, Lee Hi- No One live ver, Röyksopp- Here she comes again. 👋
ooooo I'll definitely check those out!! Thank you so much!!! :)
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