Tumgik
wallowingprotostar · 7 months
Text
Tumblr media
“their magic. their quest. their awfulness and strangeness. her raven boys”
3K notes · View notes
wallowingprotostar · 7 months
Text
Tumblr media Tumblr media
can't think about this for longer than 5 seconds without wanting to flip furniture and rip my hair out
2K notes · View notes
wallowingprotostar · 7 months
Text
Tumblr media
feeling blue
718 notes · View notes
wallowingprotostar · 7 months
Text
Tumblr media
13K notes · View notes
wallowingprotostar · 10 months
Text
jesus fucking christ you don't understand nothing will ever compare to the first time i read adam parrish describing himself as lonesome. like no i am not alone nor lonely exactly i'm just fundamentally apart from people i'm still close with because of reasons outside of my control. like genuinely out of my control i'm not just saying that. i am in pure essence Something Else. an entirely separate item. people love me. like me even. i've got friends. i engage with them in a meaningful way. i am just slightly apart and you can barely see the separation but it is there and girl i feel that separation as if i were feeling myself breathing. is this what it means to exist
751 notes · View notes
wallowingprotostar · 11 months
Text
Tumblr media
Ronan Lynch, nightwash.
2K notes · View notes
wallowingprotostar · 11 months
Text
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
the raven boys
Tumblr media
5K notes · View notes
wallowingprotostar · 11 months
Text
Tumblr media
Like a mf thief
106 notes · View notes
wallowingprotostar · 1 year
Text
An Asexual Reading of Gansey
A little while ago, I made a post saying Gansey should’ve been ace “because reasons” and then I decided to write a post detailing those reasons and here it is.
As someone who is ace, I think many ace-spec (and aro-spec) people conceptualize our romantic and platonic relationships differently than allo people might. When reading The Raven Cycle, I personally related to Gansey and how he thinks and feels about his friendships with the raven boys. Had Gansey been written as an asexual character, I think it would’ve added another layer of nuance to the unique ways in which he views these platonic relationships.
“What has he possibly done to deserve such a thing?” Helen demanded. “Are you sleeping with him?” Indignation cooled his voice. “Because friendship isn’t worthy enough?” (The Raven King, pg. 303)
Gansey prioritizes his platonic relationships just as much as his romantic relationships. In fact, Gansey’s primary concerns in the entire series (aside from finding Glendower) are his intense (and often tumultuous) friendships. His friends are such a priority that he brides the headmaster in order to guarantee that Ronan gets his high school diploma. Helen assumes that only a romantic or sexual connection would motivate someone to do something so extreme, but Gansey pushes back on this idea. For Gansey, friendship is just as worthy and just as important as any other relationship. The words,  “just a friend,” are meaningless in a Gansey world. If Richard Campbell Gansey III chooses you as his close friend, he will go to the ends of the ley line for you.
I think this is something that ace-spec and aro-spec people can relate to because we may also place higher value in our friendships just like Gansey does. Just because we don’t experience romantic or sexual feelings in the same way as everyone else, or at all, doesn’t mean we won’t still do batshit crazy things for other people.
For an ace or aro-spec person, platonic relationships can be just as strong as romantic or sexual relationships are for allo people. 
“Do you not want me to come?” Something stuck in Gansey’s throat. “I would take all of you anywhere with me.” (The Raven Boys, pg. 163)
This is just an absolutely beautiful line, and what makes it so is that Gansey truly means it. It’s so sincere and vulnerable. The things that Gansey values most in his life are his friendships, and he just wants all of them to be together forever. Besides finding Glendower, his dream in life is to literally live with all his friends in Monmouth. He begs Adam to move in with them. And I KNOW I am not the only ace-spec or aro-spec person who dreams about living in a big house with all their closest friends.
What was it about Blue? Adam was not suspicious of her, and he was suspicious of everyone. But then again, he was clearly infatuated. That, too, was unfamiliar ground for Gansey. (The Raven Boys, pg. 201)
In these couple of chapters when Adam asks Blue out with the guys and they find Cabeswater for the first time, Gansey is confused about Adam’s feelings toward Blue. There are a few interpretations: Gansey is jealous of Adam because he is attracted to Blue; Gansey is jealous of Blue because he is in love with Adam. Both of these interpretations are, of course, not mutually exclusive.
Regardless of any jealousy or attraction he may or may not be feeling in this scene, Gansey is genuinely confused because Adam liking a girl so openly is inconsistent with his perception of Adam. It is exactly as Gansey says. Adam doesn’t trust people.  To see Adam trust another person so suddenly and inexplicably in Gansey’s eyes is disconcerting to say the least.
At the door to the helicopter, Gansey looked back over his shoulder at them, his smile complicated when he saw them holding hands. (The Raven Boys, pg. 196)
Obviously, Adam has a crush on Blue, but this isn’t easy for Gansey to wrap his head around. It’s easy for Gansey to conceptualize that Adam may admire this strange and quirky girl from afar at Nino’s, but seeing them physically close after only 2 or 3 encounters utterly puzzles him.
I feel like a lot of ace-spec and aro-spec people can relate to the confusion around sudden attraction. We ask totally reasonable questions such as how do you know you like someone after only having one or two conversations with them?
If Gansey was written as asexual, one could interpret this scene as Gansey not understanding the nature of Adam’s romantic or sexual attraction to Blue. It would not be Adam’s crush that puzzles Gansey but also the idea of crushes altogether.
[Side note: Just imagine a version of Raven Boys where Gansey is lamenting the downfall of his queerplatonic relationship with Adam because Adam has a crush on a girl. It’s not even too far off from what actually happens in the books. Lmao]
“We’re friends at once, we would instantly do what friends would do for each other. Not just pals. Friends. Blood brothers. You just feel it. We instead of you and me. That’s jeong.” Gansey was aware on a certain level that the description was melodramatic, heightened, illogical. But on a deeper level, it felt true, and familiar, and like it explained much of Gansey’s life. It was how he felt about Ronan and Adam and Noah and Blue. With each of them, it had felt instantly right: relieving. Finally, he thought, he’d found them. We instead of you and me. (The Raven King, pg. 360)
How interesting that Gansey bonds with Henry Cheng, The Raven Cycle’s most aroace-coded character, about the concept of platonic soulmates. This point is pretty self-explanatory. I feel like a lot of ace and aro-spec people relate to the concept of platonic soulmates.
In conclusion, I think making Gansey asexual could’ve added another layer of nuance to the already nuanced relationships he has with all of the members of the gangsey. While it is evident in certain scenes that Gansey was not intended to be an ace-coded character, I still resonate with the ways Gansey feels about his relationships.
Also, I know I wrote about ace and aro-spec people in general for this post, but this is mainly from my own personal perspective so obviously the points I make are not necessarily representative of the entire community.
If any other aces (or aros) are reading this, let me know if you relate or if this is just a me thing. I’m curious to hear what other people think about this topic.
159 notes · View notes
wallowingprotostar · 1 year
Text
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
romance!!
bonus đŸ„ș:
Tumblr media
167 notes · View notes
wallowingprotostar · 1 year
Text
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
the dreamer trilogy's ronan lynch & adam parrish: reunions
1K notes · View notes
wallowingprotostar · 1 year
Text
testing a theory that your favorite character influences your favorite book
175 notes · View notes
wallowingprotostar · 1 year
Text
Tumblr media
happy what the fresh hell is this wednesday!
323 notes · View notes
wallowingprotostar · 1 year
Text
im like if a boy was forced to do tasks
45K notes · View notes
wallowingprotostar · 1 year
Text
“His head rested miserably on Ronan’s shoulder, everything shaking, standing only because Ronan did not allow him to sink.”
this is absolutely devastating
401 notes · View notes
wallowingprotostar · 1 year
Text
Tumblr media
looking at this while sobbing over Greywaren chapter 49
fatal hit
3K notes · View notes
wallowingprotostar · 1 year
Text
"At 300 Fox Way, Adam quietly turned eighteen" bro how the fuck does Maggie write that and expect to get away with it??? Like, did they forget his birthday??? Did they even know it??? How does no one talk about how upsetting that is, this made me cry
26 notes · View notes