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Your daily dose of cat memes
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i hate the dating scene so much
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reblog to fucking bite the person you reblog from
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I think I've worked out (part of the reason) why there's been such a huge uptick in folks who don't reblog things on here.
This post has like 14k notes right now, and the tags and comments and reblogs are FULL of people who didn't know about fast-reblog, and -- you guys have been slow-reblogging this whole time!?!??!?!?
In the interests of a) making your lives easier, and b) encouraging you to reblog posts, which is what keeps this site alive, here's how you fast-reblog:
On mobile: press and hold the reblog button. Your blog icon will appear. If you have sideblogs, all of the different icons will appear. Drag to whichever blog you want to reblog to, and release. Job done.
On desktop: hold down the E key and click reblog. Job done.
You're welcome. Now get reblogging.
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rb and put in the tags your username without using the middle row of the keyboard
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Aha! My first post for Ken has arrived!
Jealousy
Pairing: Ryan Gosling!Ken x female!reader 
Word count: 2K
Warnings/contents: Mild language, jealousy, clit stimulation, light fingering, Ken brain rot 
Notes: Naturally the first thing I wrote for Ken had to be NSFW. My brain rot has been everywhere all at once, but the thought of Ken learning about sexual pleasure and wanting to try it out on his s/o is absolutely obliterating me. So I hope that you guys enjoy this and I’m going to be putting some more things out as soon as I finish them! 
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It was something that Ken was all too familiar with. The annoyance, the tightness in his chest, how his hands would get all clammy when he saw you laughing with Ken. 
But things were different now; he had made a venture to the real world with Stereotypical Barbie based on a double bet he’d made with the exact Ken that you were standing there laughing with right now. He learned things— things that Barbies and Kens didn’t practice. After his time in the real world, Ken had come back with an idea of patriarchy, but that was until he’d seen just how well you were getting along with the other Kens in his absence. 
The thought left his mind as he stood in his minx coat, hand to his chin debating on how to scheme you away from Ken. 
Should he do something elaborate to draw your attention away? Should he just waltz right up to you, grab your hand and take you back? After all, you were rightfully his. Ken had no right to be standing there making you laugh the way that Ken usually did. 
The tension bubbled in his gut until finally, it exploded. 
Your hand rested on Ken’s bicep, and that was the final straw. Ken didn’t even think as he marched towards the two of you, scowl on his face he knew that Ken was searching for as he peeked over; you hadn’t noticed your tall blond boyfriend, but Ken had. 
You jumped when a hand grasped your wrist— rougher than his usual touch was— but when you met his pretty blue eyes, you grinned anyways. 
“Ken! You’re back!” He sent you a small smile before returning his hard stare back on the smug Ken in front of him. 
“Oh, I’m back baby.” Without another word, Ken started to drag you off with him. 
“Where are we going?” You asked, keeping up with the mans strides as you sent a quick wave back towards Ken before you returned your full attention to your boyfriend; you were excited to see him, but something was different— that much was obvious. “Why are you holding me so tight?” You frowned at your hands; his hand enveloped your whole wrist down to the palm of your hand. 
“The dreamhouse.” Was all he said before the two of you were left in an awkward silence. You eyed the coat that he was wearing with a small, confused frown. 
“What are you wearing, Ken?” 
“It’s my new style,” the way that he was speaking was different; he had an arrogant air to him— one that he’d never had before— and boy did it make your stomach flip in the best way possible. “I learned things in the real world, Barbie,” he sent you a mischievous grin as your dreamhouse came into view. “And I can’t wait to show you.” 
“Like what?” You asked as he pushed the doors open and let them close on their own. The sofa was in his sights, so he turned and quickly picked you up, tossing you over his shoulder. You gave out a gasp in surprise before you laughed— the sound that he’d always endeared the most. “Ken!” You giggled.” What are you doing?” He set you down gently, pressing a knee to the sofa to ease you onto the comfortable cushions. You grinned at your boyfriend, and for the first time since he’d come home, everything felt right again. 
“I have so much to show you, baby.” 
“Like what?” You asked again, hoping this time he might answer you. 
Ken was quick to press a lingering kiss to your lips— it was normal, a sweet kiss from Ken before the two of you parted or when you were alone together was frequent. He was your touchy boyfriend, always needing your hand in his and dying before his arm wasn’t around your waist. 
But this time, Ken didn’t pull back after a few seconds. Instead, he pressed closer to you, resting one of his hands on the back of the sofa when your hand tenderly cupped his cheek. For a moment, he wondered if this was the right way to do this— without you knowing a single thing that he had in mind. It almost made him feel bad. You were so trusting and he worried you might feel like he was betraying your trust right now. 
But then the thought of corrupting you and making you see what he’d seen came to his mind and he gave a smirk into the kiss. 
The two of you weren’t unfamiliar with a make out session, but they never started like this. Your stomach tightened as Ken pressed his body to yours and pushed you back onto the sofa until you were on your back beneath him. He pulled back to send you a smile and eye you for a moment before leaning back in with a quick lick of his lips. 
“You’re so beautiful,” his sweet compliments were common, but his voice was different; deeper— sensual. 
“Ken?” You mumbled adorably, eyeing the man with a new look in your eyes that made him ache for you in his chest; the curiosity, the obedience, the trust— you were all his. Even with Ken outside dying to tease him and get on his last nerve, you didn’t want anything to do with him— and deep down Ken knew this. But he couldn’t help getting jealous. 
This time though, he was going to make sure he showed Ken just who you belonged to even when he wanted to make the mans blood boil. 
He ignored you, leaning down to press a few soft, scattered kisses to your neck. You leaned your head back with a soft hum and closed your eyes. An adoring smile crept onto your face as your hand entangled in his soft hair, but you were quick to yelp. 
“Ken!” His teeth nipped at your skin, but he was quick to give a soft lick to ease the sting. Then, another. And another, and another, until he was planting hard kisses to your neck and sucking on your soft skin. “What are you doing?” 
Finally, your boyfriend pulled back, licking his lips and sending you a grin— one you didn’t see very often. 
“You’re my Barbie,” he said lowly. “Not Ken’s. Mine.” 
“Well, yeah…” Your face was hot as you averted the intense eye contact. His hand was quick to force you back, grasping your chin in a firm but gentle way. His blue eyes bore deep into yours, almost as if they were seeing right through you and to your soul. 
“Say it.” 
“I’m yours.” You mumbled, but it didn’t seem to make him happy. 
“Look at me, and say it.” You gulped, forcing yourself to meet his gaze; your stomach was tight, fingers shaking in excitement and your chest aching— it was almost a new sensation, one that you weren’t used to, but a jolt shot through your body when Ken grasped at your waist, waiting patiently for you to regain your composure. 
“I’m yours.” You said louder this time, though your voice was still shaky. “I’m all yours, Ken. I wouldn’t ever want anyone else anyways.” He sent you a grin and leaned in for a kiss. 
“That’s right baby. You’re all mine. And I’m going to make sure the other Ken’s don’t forget that.” Ken moved against you, his groin pressing to your thigh. Your face flushed: it wasn’t the first time you’d felt Ken this hard, and it wouldn’t be the last, but it was something that always flustered you. Before he went to the real world, sex was almost ritualistic here in Barbieland. 
But now, it seemed like Ken unlocked his libido, and in turn made your sex drive shoot through the roof at this moment. 
“You’re all mine. But I’m all yours.” Ken spoke, his fingers teasing up your skirt and grasping your thigh with a new intensity— one that made you yelp in shock. His strong fingers rubbed your delicate skin gently. “You’re so beautiful. Especially with that mark on you.” He grinned, eyeing your neck that had a small formed hickey. He planned to give you more, but that would do for now. “And these legs… so smooth, so soft.” He gave a dreamy sigh, and in one swift movement, Ken grasped the hem of your skirt and panties and yanked them off your waist, momentarily lifting your hips before he let you fall back onto the cushions with a small bounce. 
“Ken!” You gasped, face hot as your clothing lingered around your knees. He sent you a smile— trying to look innocent but failing so horridly. Ken had a devious look on his face, one that made you twitch. “What are you doing?” 
“I’m gonna show you what I learned. I saw things. I heard things.” He slipped your skirt off your legs and tossed the clothing aside, though he brought your panties to his nose and gave a deep inhale before he set them on the back of the sofa. “Do you trust me?” Tentatively, you nodded; this was new, and new was scary, but it was also Ken, and Ken was never scary. 
“More than anything.” 
“Good girl.” He grinned, lifting your legs over his shoulders and resting one of his knees on the floor by the sofa as he leaned down, his other leg stretching behind him as comfortably as he could get in this position; he was unsure how to get comfortable yet, but he was too eager to show you what he learned to worry about himself. 
Ken pressed his tongue out, leaning in and giving your pussy a slow, long lick— one that made you give a sound he had only heard when you’d first had sex. It was not often and it was quick— not to say Ken was quick— but there was little to no foreplay. And nothing like this, that was for sure. 
Your head laid back on the pillows as his tongue teased your clit with slow circles. Ken took a moment to curl his tongue inside of you, earning a sweet moan as you grasped at the sofa cushions for dear life. With one hand, Ken reached up and shoved it beneath your shirt, groping at your bare breast. His fingers teased your nipples as his tongue pushed as deep inside of you as he could get it. 
Your body jerked, instinctively you reached down and grasped at his head when you gave a moan out of his name. He grinned before he went back to your clit, glancing up at you with mischievous eyes; he hoped the other Kens could hear you now, and yet there was enough satisfaction knowing that you were a sight only for his eyes that eased his jealousy. 
He didn’t care if the other Kens ever knew about this. In fact, the more he thought about it, the less he wanted them to hear your sweet moans even to prove a point. 
Aching for any kind of stimulation, Ken rubbed himself against the sofa cushion almost desperately. Your fingers tugged at his hair as he sucked on your clit and brought his free hand to your entrance. He shifted, pushing his middle finger inside of you and starting to pump it slowly. He was trying to do three things at once— tease your clit, play with your nipple, and now finger you— as well as occasionally grinding himself against the cushions, though that quickly became less of a thought and more of a movement in pure desperation. 
Finally, he pulled back with a hum in satisfaction. 
“Good girl,” Ken mumbled, licking his lips and catching your eye. Your face was hot, your eyes were desperate, and your perfect hair was mussed up from digging your head back into the sofa. Your bottom lip was caught between your teeth as you attempted to keep quiet. “Don’t stop it, I want to hear you.” Ken shifted, leaning up to press a kiss to your lips as his finger curled inside of you and elicited another moan. “Moan for me. Moan my name. You’re all mine and I want you to know it even when I’m not around.” 
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Okay, This Is Just Getting Out Of Hand
I CAN'T STOP THINKING ABOUT RYAN GOSLING'S KEN
So naturally I made a blog for him where I will be periodically writing stories for Ryan Gosling's Ken. At This Point I'm just letting my creativity flow wherever it wants to in hopes it'll come back to haikyuu soon enough, but I can't possibly write for anyone when Ryan is all I can think about.
This is the Masterlist for Ken. I will be creating things as I can, but with my job I really want to sleep and do nothing when I'm not working, so any writing is kind of a miracle right now.
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i’m so fucking feral for Ryan Gosling’s Ken i can’t think straight. i’m literally braindead for him oh my fucking god
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oh my GOD
I’m drunk and crying about my ex again send help
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Yay! Last night of work and then I’m off for two days! (I will be sleeping the entire time I’m off work)
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One like and I’ll go back to my ex
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This is a reminder for all my girlies out there (me)
You can’t fix him, don’t waste your time (I’m definitely going to ignore my advice and try to fix him) He’s not worth it (I’m so in love with him) You’re worth so much more than that (that part is true (but I’d still go back to him if he even mentioned wanting me I’m so pathetic for him))
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Boy, oh boy do I not want to work tonight 😩
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I literally left for a while out of tumblr, changed my name and so on, but I come back to the queen crying?! Hello?! Honey are you okay?
Not at all, but I’m trying really hard to be 😂
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I did a silly little oil painting awhile back and finally got to hang it up
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Thanks to my trauma, I’m too clingy for aloof men (the ones I really want) and I’m too aloof for the clingy men ❤️
My boyfriend really loves me but I just can’t stop thinking about my ex that would never talk to me about his feelings and that hurts me more than I thought it would 👍
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