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the way Fredrik Backman uses the word bang as a motif throughout the Beartown series and how it becomes a signifier of life and death. bang-bang-bang the sound of pucks hitting a wall as a reminder of life. BANG BANG the sound of a gun firing, ending a life. How a single word can encapsulate the entire series with its versatility. Humans are capable of so much evil but also so much good. Just like hockey can be riddled with violence but also be a safe haven. How the culture of the club can build some kids up and destroy others. Or how a town in the forest can simultaneously be so suffocating yet so freeing
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NOW I REALISED A PARALLEL THAT IS A GREAT SPOILER SO DO NOT READ IF YOU HAVEN'T FINISHED THE THIRD BOOK
But... you know how Adri is the one that finds their dad in the forest? The one that caries him home? She is the one carrying Benji too. And the forest and the hockey ring are pretty much the same thing. Cruel and lovely and cold and home. Until they turn dangerous.
The big sister being a rock for so long and ending up with her biggest nightmate coming true.
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What i have to add now is this: benji will always have his lines highlighted with my favourite glitter light blue highlighter. Because he is all heart. And he is storm lined and a forest folk but above all else. He is a hero with a shinning armour.
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Did i not mention bobo and how tess loves him for not running towards a fire but towards her??? Because it's important. Because bobo came a long way. And he grew up and become a man his mum could have been proud of. Just... sigh
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I have to mention something else tho. The metaphor with the time machine. Wild. I am crying, throwing up, broken and never again whole. That paragraph... No
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So, like every other stupid pers9n, I read the winners fully aware that i will be destroyed, taken apart like a riffle and dumpted into a lake ( too soon?)
Anyhow. I have so many thoughts, it's wild.
First. BENJI. my whole soul was trembling and aching from the first page. And the knowing of what will happen still didn't stop me from hopping in some twisted way that it might not hold true. I read once that the reason we read tragedies, despite knowing how terribly they end, it's becose we always hold the hope that maybe,just maybe, this time, things will turn differently (that was from a post about hadestown, but let's not go into the details). So despite knowing it was futile, i hoped something will be different, that all that foreshadowing was an elaborate ruse. But somehow... there comes some semblence of piece with knowing the end. With hoping that if there is even a heaven out there, it's for people like him. And it's all full of frozen lakes to skate on and fish zero fish from and all that.
That being said, I have to tell you i cried so much i ended up with a headache. Because this whole book is a testament to so much love and so much hate it's unbelievable.
I never felt as protective over a character as when i heard that peter was threatened to go to prison. Because I love peter. He makes croissants for his wife and bread that covers all the counters in the kitchen and he just wants to feel needed.
And I love how this trilogy is so full of circles. Peter and Alicia the most beautiful one of them all. But also, Zachall and her one time number 16, Maya and the bass singer, amat and the hollow, the baptism of sins through cathedrals. All of it. There is so much violence and injustice and so many people that commit so many wrongs. And despite all of it or maybe exactly for and because of it, there is so much love sipping through each crack. There is a boy named Vidar born in the middle of the forrest. Ana is saving and world. Teemu has a child that hates hockey. The Ovich family can still breathe and hold on to each other. The cherry tree blossoms.
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Is there anyone living in UK that could help me with completing a form for some extra credit :))?
Help a student in need💛
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[Text:"I am afraid that I don't love you enough/ So to cut a piece of myself and give it to you/ Just to survive on borrowed time/ That you waste gulping down and throwing up."- J.F: and you're swallowingthe world]
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reblog if you wear glasses. too many mutuals don't know they have glasses wearers in their midsts
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I just gotta say, in that scene where kaz confronts pekka he looks so deranged, in the best way possible. He seems to be borderline insane and that is such great acting I will burst. I think they did the crows magnificently in that sense. Overall good scenes, really strong heartbreaking acting.
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I can't say I appreciate how the spun around the demon part. I mean, it was supposed to be a way through witch the darkling took what nikolai valued most. His own mind, his rationality. And now it is framed as some sort of accident????
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I just finished the show and my only impression is what the actual fuck.
So, to recap, the mockery of this one:
David is considered dead but there is no body
There was a bee on zoya's shoulder, kinda smart
MAL IS A PIRATE??? AND WEARS STURMHOIND COAT????
Inej is already haunting slavers
The no armor chat
WHY IS NIKOLAY DRESSED IN BLACK FOR HIS OWN CORONATION MAKE IT MAKE SENSE
Alina is not faking her death??? And she stays
THOSE TACKY DRESSES???? DUDE, THE KEFKA ARE SUPERRIOR. ZOYA AND GENYA DHOULD HAVE WORN SOME CUTE, MAYBE MORE GLAMOROUS KEFKAS, NOT SOME WEIRD COURTESAN DRESSes
They have a triumvirate??????
Zoya's a flirt now?????? Her personality, where is it????
Alina controlds shadow???? She rebirth mal????
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And another thing, it irks me that everyone calls nikolai king. It is a title he FOUGHT to gain. It feels now like, oh guess everyone else died, you are king now. When, I just feel like he had to struggle to obtain it.
and on that note, WHERE IS THE CURSE OF THE DARKLING???? WHERE IS THE DEMON???? It is such an integral part of nikolai development and journey and it's nowhere!!!!!
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THE FACT THEY GAVE US DOMINIK IN THE WRONG TIME PERIOD AND CHANGED HIS SPEACH.
Like, in the books it is supposed to be a part of nikolai backstory that highlights the sacrifices of a king, that remind him rawka is a godforsaken country that takes over and over again, that stripes you of everything and showcases no marcy. I hope I remember it correctly. I am hello sure tho Dominic didn't tell him he would be a good king.
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The fact that they just casually put each and every character in a death situation before the last episode is unbelievable. I fear for my life. DAVID CAN'T DIE THIS SOON, I EILL NOT ALLOW IT
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KAZ WTF I KNOW YOUR RESPONSE TO ANYONE DISSAPOINTING YOU IS BLUNTLY IZOLATING YOURSELF FROM THEM BUT.... IT'S INEJ.
Look people, both sides have hurt each other and had really good reasons to be upset. But they were doing so good....
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The proposal scene was somehow cute. I think I found what irks me about show nikolai. He is rougher than I imagined him. Which makes sense in some way but my brain just bluntly refused it
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