thenegativeonce
this is the void
And this is where I died
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I think I’m putrid and disgusting and hulking. I feel like I’m letting down my bf.
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The joy has been sucked from life and now every moment feels the same. I feel like I’m on autopilot going through life. I have nobody who really connects with me. I’m unhappy with my relationship. I’m unhappy with myself. I’m unhappy with my job. I’m unhappy with my life.
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Back again.
I feel so alone. Everything is crashing around me again. I feel like I have no support. And the people that care don’t offer to help. I’m too afraid to ask. I don’t want to be the leech.
My stomach pain is dull but more noticeable than before.
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Nobody fucking cares about me and I don’t know why. I have a big heart for others but it is not reciprocated. If I was gone, nobody would even cry or care about my absence. Nobody would donate to have me creamated or buried in the ground.
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Why am I so unloved? Why don’t people actually care for me? Why am I alone?
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He doesn’t like me anymore, and why should I be surprised? I was the cause of all this
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I can’t even talk to a boy I don’t know
He didn’t like me instantly
What is the point of being alive
When I’m all alone
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I want to kill myself so badly
I’m very sad and lonely
But I have too much hope
And I don’t want it.
I want to end my life
I dream about it and think about it every day
But I don’t have the strength to do it
Even though I really want to
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If you need me
Wanna see me
Better hurry
Cause I’m leaving soon
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God creates things to harm and torture you
The devil takes things away
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