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the-exercist · 20 days
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Kimchi Jjigae
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the-exercist · 3 months
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Periodic reminder that you should never trust a chiropractor with your body under any circumstances
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the-exercist · 6 months
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Vegan Butter Chicken Ramen
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the-exercist · 6 months
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If you set a boundary and someone else is disappointed or angry or upset, that reaction does not mean you’re not allowed to set boundaries or that it was wrong of you to do that.
If you ask someone for something and they say no, that does not mean you shouldn’t ask for things or that it was wrong of you to ask. Saying no to something, even if you really want it, is not (by itself) an attack on you, either.
There will be times in every good relationship where one person says no to what the other person wants. And there will be times when that answer feels bad to the other person.
That can be uncomfortable, but it’s healthy and good to be able to say no to each other. It’s healthy and good to ask each other for things and give the other person the chance to say yes or no. It’s healthy and good for each of you to be able to hear “no” and accept it even when it’s disappointing.
It’s healthy and good to own your emotional reaction and make sure you both agree that being upset is a normal and manageable feeling, not a crisis that requires someone to give up their boundaries.
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the-exercist · 6 months
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everyone says 'prioritize your health' 'look after yourself' until they realize that making your wellbeing your first priority means making everything else a lower priority. and yeah, that's sometimes ok if it's temporary, but if those health issues are chronic? oh boy do they not like it when you actually take their advice. sometimes prioritizing your health means neglecting your work, your household chores, your social life. 'looking after yourself' means not putting your energy into looking after everyone else first. and the same people who tell you to prioritize your health will get upset with you when they realize it means you're no longer priorizing them.
if you have disabled or chronically ill people in your life and you extend them sympathy and tell them to look after themselves when they're feeling sick, but then you get upset at then because they keep canceling plans. please. reevaluate.
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the-exercist · 8 months
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Chicken and Broccoli Stuffed Shells with a Creamy Chive Sauce
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the-exercist · 8 months
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Green Apple Sorbet
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the-exercist · 8 months
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What are the signs of emotional abuse?
Abusive Expectations - Makes impossible demands, requires constant attention, and constantly criticizes.
Aggressing - Name calling, accusing, blames, threatens or gives orders, and often disguised as a judgmental “I know best” or “helping” attitude.
Constant Chaos - Deliberately starts arguments with you or others. May treat you well in front of others, but changes when you’re alone.
Rejecting - Refusing to acknowledge a person’s value, worth or presence. Communicating that he or she is useless or inferior or devaluing his or her thoughts and feelings.
Denying - Denies personal needs (especially when need is greatest) with the intent of causing hurt or as punishment. Uses silent treatment as punishment. Denies certain events happened or things that were said. Denies your perceptions, memory and sanity by disallowing any viewpoints other than their own which causes self-doubt, confusion, and loss of self-esteem.
Degrading - Any behavior that diminishes the identity, worth or dignity of the person such as: name-calling, mocking, teasing, insulting, ridiculing,
Emotional Blackmail - Uses guilt, compassion, or fear to get what he or she wants.
Terrorizing - Inducing intense fear or terror in a person, by threats or coercion.
Invalidation - Attempts to distort your perception of the world by refusing to acknowledge your personal reality. Says that your emotions and perceptions aren’t real and shouldn’t be trusted.
Isolating - Reducing or restricting freedom and normal contact with others.
Corrupting - Convincing a person to accept and engage in illegal activities.
Exploiting - Using a person for advantage or profit.
Minimizing - A less extreme form of denial that trivializes something you’ve expressed as unimportant or inconsequential.
Unpredictable Responses - Gets angry and upset in a situation that would normally not warrant a response. You walk around on eggshells to avoid any unnecessary drama over innocent comments you make. Drastic mood swings and outbursts.
Gaslighting -A form of psychological abuse involving the manipulation of situations or events that cause a person to be confused or to doubt his perceptions and memories. Gaslighting causes victims to constantly second-guess themselves and wonder if they’re losing their minds.
Love, Salem
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the-exercist · 9 months
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Som Tam
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the-exercist · 9 months
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Garnett Henderson at Rewire News Group:
The Food and Drug Administration made history today when it approved Opill, a progestin-only birth control pill, for over-the-counter use. When Opill becomes available in pharmacies in early 2024, it will be the first nonprescription daily birth control pill in the United States. Opill’s OTC approval is a major victory for advocates and researchers who have pushed for this change for decades. It also catches the United States up to most of the rest of the world, where contraceptive pills have long been more accessible. Experts agree: It’s about time. There’s no question that the FDA’s approval of the first birth control pill 63 years ago changed the course of many of our lives. But for too many people—especially low-income people, people of color, and young people—a full range of contraceptive options remains out of reach. The FDA’s approval of OTC Opill is an important step forward in access, at a time when the conservative movement is ratcheting up its attacks on birth control. 
This morning, the FDA made history by approving the first over-the-counter birth control pill called Opill. It will become available in pharmacies beginning in early 2024.
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the-exercist · 9 months
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YES MA’AM!
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the-exercist · 9 months
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BBQ Sweet Potato Chickpea Tacos
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the-exercist · 9 months
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So on my posts about racism or transmisogyny, I often see tags that basically say “I don’t understand this but I’m going to reblog it anyway.” If you see a “social justice” type post that you want to reblog but don’t understand?
Don’t.
I know this goes against everything you’re used to hearing on this website, but listen. Reblogging posts you don’t understand is basically the equivalent of blindly repeating whatever you’re told. Even if you’re right, if you don’t understand why you’re right, you could be spouting utter bullshit and you wouldn’t even know it.
When I see “I don’t know what this means but I’m gonna reblog it anyway” it sends a lot of messages. It says that you care more about seeming right than being right. It says that you want good ally credit without any of the work of being a good ally. It says you’re on my side because I can make a post sound good, not because you actually agree with me on anything beyond the surface level.
So instead of just reblogging that post, save it for later. Like it, draft it, bookmark it, whatever. Go to the op’s blog and skim through a couple of pages, see if you can find some context. If the post is old, you could try asking for context in a non-condescending way. “Is this post referring to something specific?” is a lot better than, say, “Does this even happen? I’ve never heard of this.”
If that doesn’t help, do some more research. Google, search tumblr tags for recent posts on a subject, ask people who have EXPLICITLY stated they are willing to educate. Maybe in the process you’ll find more posts with a similar message to the original, but in easier to understand language. Maybe someone else already added a reply that adds useful information onto the op.
And maybe all of that takes a long time. Maybe, by the time you finally understand what the post was talking about, it’s months old and no longer relevant. Maybe you don’t even want to reblog it anymore. Who cares, fuck that post. You learned and grew as a person. That’s more important than looking good on a blog.
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the-exercist · 9 months
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I think the bicycle helmet discourse really just reinforces the idea that people believe that accidents only happen to the stupid and careless, and that people who get hurt somehow deserve it. And since nobody wants to believe themselves to be stupid, or thinks they could be careless or distracted, it's not necessary to take precautions.
And then they take safety advice as an insult because telling someone to be safe is seen as an accusation of being stupid and irresponsible, and not just a value neutral acknowledgement of statistical inevitably. We see it with masks, and seatbelts, and now bicycle helmets because everyone wants to believe they're too clever to get hurt, and too lucky to get hurt badly, until suddenly you're not and you have to resign, in shame, to being one of the people you previously saw as annoying nags, assuming you're even still alive.
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the-exercist · 9 months
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For those with homes built to keep heat in, not let it out: aluminum foil your windows, shiny side out. Cover the window, tape up the sides, maybe tape cardboard behind it to help insulate from the heat outside and absorb heat that gets through the foil.
Love, a former Californian, whose had to keep houses cool without any electricity.
P.S. this is a method endorsed by FEMA and the Department of Energy, so if you need more than anecdotal evidence, there ya go.
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the-exercist · 9 months
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Naengmyeon
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the-exercist · 9 months
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So I could easily blame the baby for why I haven't been online. I've drastically reduced screen time because of her, which means less/no Tumblr.
But the reality is that I haven't been posting because the Google Pixel is trash - every time my phone is forced to update, there's a new and exciting bug. Around January, an update created a dead zone at the top of my screen, right around where Tumblr's "post" button is, so I literally can't publish posts normally. I can only post by creating a post, going to delete it, choosing the pop up option to "save as draft," then publishing directly from my drafts.
So if I'm not doing much around here or being active, blame Google's top notch programming and planned obsolescence.
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