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thatgirl4815 · 3 months

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uuuuuugghhhhhhhhhhhhh this is gonna be long I'm sorry in advance -

An Alternate Timeline Headcanon for the Final Episode of Last Twilight

or; There Was A Much Better Way To Handle This And It Wasn't Timeskips: Plotting Out MorkDay Post-Breakup to a Satisfactory Happy Ending

or; I CAN'T BELIEVE THIS IS THE SECOND TIME IN LESS THAN SIX MONTHS I HAVE TO DO THIS! THIS WASN'T SUPPOSED TO BE A FREAKING SERIES!

... *ahem*. Apparently this is my coping strategy.

Disclaimer: I'm keeping the breakup at the end of episode 11, because I actually believe the conflict of it was in character for both of them, and I wanted so badly to see it handled well, and... well, we all know it wasn't.

Let's set some parameters for this. Going into this finale, we needed to sort through three main things (thank you very much @lurkingshan, your post about this is the inspiration and I 100% agree):

Day's trajectory of acceptance in the narrative

ableism in Day's family and the unresolved issues they have

Mork's trauma vs. Day's trauma, aka the reason for the breakup

Before we dive into the plot part, let's go into a little more detail on each.

As many have noted, it is not an unrealistic outcome for Day's disability to have a cure. Day recovering his sight is not outside of the realm of possibility, and doesn't mean he wouldn't still learn from his journey as a disabled man. And I don't want to slight anyone's real-life experiences at all. But, given that so much of the framework of this show was about Day growing towards acceptance and agency, being able to live his life the way he chose while still being a disabled man... in our version, Day will not be getting his sight back. I wouldn't have minded if they left it as a "maybe someday" hope-for-the-future thing, but to me, in terms of narrative function, the central message of the story was largely undercut in the last 15 minutes. This is about what will best serve the narrative; so, Day stays blind.

In terms of ableism in Day's family, especially the way Day's mom got off the hook for her treatment of him... I have to admit, I'm not going to completely fix or solve that in the finale. We'd have to go back further (episode 10/11 at least) to truly address her wrongs to my satisfaction. So why not do that, go back and fix this issue from its starting point? ...I'm tired, y'all. We're going to do what we can given the parameters I set myself: one episode. It might not be enough, but let's try. (I will be retconning at least a little of the moment immediately following the breakup, so there's that.)

And as for the breakup itself... I just want to give a little clarity on why I think it works. In episode 11, there was some focus on the caregiver vs. boyfriend issue - Day bored and alone, Mork working but worried; a need for growth beyond existing patterns in order for Mork and Day to make it, the proving ground for their success as a couple. But given all that, I see their fight and breakup as competing trauma responses from two well-meaning people. We understand Mork's choice not to take the job in Hawaii based on his feeling that he failed Rung in the past - despite his reluctance to share that with Day until forced to by their fight. And I understand Day's choice too, as 1) a person who holds his anger unnecessarily long (see: Night) and 2) as a stubborn young man who hates being pitied, because it denies him a say in his own life and the lives of others, especially and most hurtfully in the context of his own family, the people who are supposed to understand him best. Was Mork's choice made out of pity? No, I don't think so. But I believe Day would interpret it that way, and I believe he would feel like a breakup was the best option in the moment.

SO! With all of that in mind... let's fix episode 12.

Part 1/4

We open in the immediate aftermath of the breakup. Mork has just left, and I want to linger on Day's line "Did I make the right decision?". (I think it shows some good growth for Day that he questions himself in the immediate moment following, considering that he has been known to hold a grudge far too long without looking back.) Night wants to understand why Day would go to that length, and wants to defend Mork. Mhon probably says something about how she feared this might happen, that sometimes love makes you make difficult decisions. Day gets to lose his cool at them both here, particularly Mhon. "I can't tell between love and pity anymore, Mom!" Day says he's just so tired of being pitied by everyone, and not being allowed to have a say in his own life, including in his family. He brings up the lengths Mhon went to to keep him and Mork apart, and the way they've rarely treated him as normal or capable since he lost his sight. Mhon will be somewhat ashamed about this, and probably break down. Night, meanwhile, can gently express that he just wants Day to be happy with his choice, and now Day can wonder if he truly is.

Meanwhile, a miserable Mork has Phorjai over to help him pack. He's going over the details with her: he's taking the job in Hawaii, his flight leaves in four days, and he'll be on a six month work visa. Phorjai will ask him how he's feeling, and he gets to be honest with her. He doesn't understand Day's choice, but he wants to respect his decision. She says the job will be good for him, and he agrees, even if he's sad now. They end up talking about Rung, and Mork gets to break down about it, about how miserable he feels, like he's failed all over again, despite his best intentions. (This would be the first time since the flashbacks we have seen Mork get to actually process his grief so this is very important!)

Part 2/4

A couple days later, Night takes Day to the university. Day has a cane in hand and is ready to re-enroll, and Mhon doesn't want to stand in his way. We return to the same professor from episode three (!), who is happy Day is back, and ready to discuss how they will be accommodating him. Day goes over the courses he wants to take, and there's one that the professor has hesitations about, but decides to let Day enroll anyway. Outside the office, Night asks how it went, and Day says the professor pitied him enough to let him into all his classes. But the door to the office is open, and the professor overheard this. He enters the conversation and corrects Day - to Day's surprise - that it isn't pity that changed his mind. He believes Day is capable and he wants to see him succeed, so he gave his approval. The class will be hard, but Day is up for it. Day can be visibly moved by this. (NOT EVERYONE PITIES YOU IN ALL SCENARIOS BABY BOY TIME TO LEARN THIS)

Mork says his goodbyes to Phorjai and Poomjai (who we did not get enough of! give me more cute baby!) and, with a heavy heart and a reprise of Last Twilight in the background, gets in a cab to go to the airport.

Day is now definitely unsure if he made the right choice, wishing he could have a chance to talk to Mork, but thinks he's too late because Mork is conveniently not answering his phone. Day finds out that Mork is on his way to the airport (because the information pipeline still goes Mork -> Phorjai -> Night -> Day even when Mork and Day aren't talking 😂) to leave for Hawaii.

So guess what! We keep the stupid rush to the airport! (Although this time we're NOT doing it at the freaking wedding, dear lord. Namtan was precious in that scene but nope.) Night gets the flight information from Phorjai, and we see a few cute flirty texts between them on his screen. Day asks Night to hurry but Night says he doesn't want to get them into an accident, and Day softens and says "I know, me too. Just do your best." (BROTHERLY FORGIVENESS!)

Day makes it to the airport in time, and finds Mork, but Mork has only like a minute to spare before he has to go. Day tells him he's still upset about everything, but he'll miss Mork while he's gone. If he's coming back to Thailand in six months... can they talk things out then? Mork agrees. Day wishes him a safe flight, and they part.

Part 3/4

Instead of a time skip, we now enter a quick MONTAGE of the next six months! We see Day at university, doing well in his classes! We see Night and Phorjai on a cute date with Poomjai! We see Mhon with Day at the Society, attending meetings and making an effort to unlearn some ableism through Aon and Pla! We see Mork on a video call with Phorjai and Poomjai! We see Day comfortably using a cane, and teaching his replacement caretaker his routine, and being respected for his choices! We see Mork thriving as a chef in Hawaii, getting compliments from customers and his boss!

There's a quick scene where Mork has to go back, but his boss offers him an extension of his work visa, if he wants. He can go home and have time to think about it. Mork is happy to have options.

The six months are up, and Mork has returned to Thailand. Day has been waiting for this moment, but he's nervous - maybe we see Night helping him get ready, teasing him a little.

Day, in this version, is the one who asks for a second chance. His apology is sincere. He's been working on things, on himself, on his future, and he wants the chance to give them another go. He's sorry for assuming Mork's choice was made out of pity, and he admits they aren't perfect together, it's not always easy being a couple. They'll need to communicate clearly if this is going to work, if Day is going to be more than just a burden to Mork. But he wants that chance. "We might have more problems, in the future. If we're going to fight, I want to be with you when we do. I want to fight at your side. Will you let me try?"

They meet at a cafe, and Night leaves them to it. They ask how the other has been, both sharing small talk about them both doing well. Then Mork asks if he can take Day to meet someone. They go to Rung's grave, at the temple, and Mork 'introduces' Day to his family. Day asks if Mork will tell him the whole story of his sister, and Mork does. Mork takes the chance to say that he still doesn't really understand their breakup. He'll admit Day was right at the time, Mork was treating him differently because of his disability, and he's sorry about that, but if Mork could go back to that time, he'd still make the same choice all over again. He loved Day then, and just wanted to stay with him. And as hurt as he feels, Mork still loves him now, and he just wants Day to know that. Even if they don't have a future together.

And he will, of course. Mork takes Day's hand, and with a rainbow in the sky, they get a fresh start.

Part 4/4

Okay, now you can have your damn timeskip! (We earned it as a happiness epilogue, you see.) A reasonable amount of time later, no more than a couple years.

We definitely keep the happy family dinner moment where Mork's cooking impresses Mhon, and she asks him to call her Mom. We get Day moving in with Mork, and Mork's replacement caregiver, now only part-time, helping them smooth out worries and helping Day lead his independent life. Day graduates, opens his bookshop, and does become a public speaker. Night asks Phorjai to marry him. The final scene is of Mork and Day dancing at the wedding.

A happy ending, at last. One they - and we! - actually deserve. 😊

(Anyway this is now apparently a thing I do sometimes, and this was obscenely long. But if you made it all the way through, I appreciate you so so much. I hope you can see the love I have for this show, even through all my disappointment. Let me know what you think!)

#this would’ve been the ideal ending fr #it’s what we deserved #last twilight #last twilight the series

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thatgirl4815 · 3 months

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Mark and Namtan main couple series when?

#I love them #Namtan is everything #porjainight #last twilight #last twilight the series #mark pakin #namtan tipnaree #Gmmtv #Gmmtv 2024 please

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thatgirl4815 · 3 months

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My babies emerging from their hibernation (and flirting like mad as usual 😂)

Source: Khaotung’s IG

28/01/2024

#khao khao 🥺🥺#khaotung thanawat

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thatgirl4815 · 3 months

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Last Twilight, episode 12: final reflections

Wow. It took me all of this past weekend to process this finale, notwithstanding the usual life craziness that has dogged me lately.

Let me preface this whole thing by saying that I'm confused by what I watched. I'd say that, overall -- I actually quite liked this series, and I especially, absolutely ADORED JimmySea, Namtan, and Mark, and their acting. JimmySea kicked major ass, and I really hope they get another big and complicated show to chew on.

I also want to say that between episodes 11 and 12, I felt that I saw uncharacteristic editing clunkiness from Aof Noppharnach and his team that left a lot of necessary emotional and ethical processing on the cutting room floor. I think that's what's ultimately making me feel uneasy about the process of watching this, but -- funnily enough, I'm not nearly as "angry" about the ending as I was with other bad shows that fell apart in their last quarter recently. It was obvious that MhokDay were going to get together.

But I needed to walk a few more steps with them on their journey to that end.

Before I got my eyes on the finale, a few reactions on social media, from Tumblr to Twitter gave me the case of the jibbles. Namely: that the story of Last Twilight would have worked better if Day had stayed blind through the end.

I wasn't really understanding how that construction could work without walking through some sort of ethical minefield.

Now that I've seen the finale -- especially that infamous 4/4 segment -- I understand better what those arguments were saying.

Yet, I'm still dogged by a kind of ethical confusion here. And maybe that was one of the points of this finale, another one of Aof Noppharnach's perhaps now-famous-or-infamous emotionally inconclusive endings.

To me, there are two ethical potholes that this show stumbled on:

1) The ethics WITHIN the fictional piece itself for a character to not depict the process of considering the various fates he might face vis à vis a potentially reversible impairment, and

2) The ethics of a REAL audience ultimately wanting a different outcome for a fictional character to NOT have an impairment reversed.

TL;DR — I don’t think Last Twilight spent enough time having Day consider the permanence or impermanence of the various fates he faced, including permanent blindness. I don’t think the characters, and as such, the audience, spent enough time understanding that a corneal transplant was always going to be Day’s endgame.

Last Twilight was marketed as a show focused on disability, on a man going blind in a society that prioritizes the able-bodied, and how he would adjust to his disability, and of course (this being GMMTV), his falling in love. As fans, we were prepared to receive a whole show about a character with a disability, not as a side pairing, à la Heart and Li Ming in Moonlight Chicken.

It so happened that Day's visual impairment was corneal deterioration -- a condition that could lead to permanent blindness, and thus qualify him for a corneal transplant.

What I'm struggling with is the crux of the ethical dilemma that this show was ALWAYS going to have to deal with: that a corneal impairment of the kind that Day experienced, in the prime of his life, could very well be reversed with surgery, a surgery that has tremendous success rates.

As such -- as we got that clarification in drips throughout the series -- this show was actually not ONLY going to be about the newfound adjustment of a recently-impaired man to an ableist society. It was ALWAYS going to have this door of ANOTHER major change, the reversal of the impairment, just slightly cracked open. I'm not sure that I, as a viewer, was fully prepared for this, even as Night and Mae Mhon spoke about "eye donations" as givens in the middle of the series. I believe the show needed to be much louder, earlier, about the "hope" that Day could "go back" to "living a normal life," instead of framing the high majority of the show around his adjustments to his impairment.

As we went through Day's adjustment to life outside of his room, I believe we needed to hear, FROM DAY HIMSELF, that a corneal transplant was a conclusion that HE believed in, that HE wanted. A failure of this series was that we unfortunately only heard that from his family members, leaving us to only ASSUME that the conclusion of the reversal of his impairment was ALSO Day's intention.

For a story that was very much about an individual's developing agency and self-advocacy: I believe I needed to hear from Day himself that he was good and ready for the final surgery. I only assume that was the case, as I saw his own body and mind in the hospital. But I believe, for dramatic success, that I could have used a basic, "I'm ready," from him, to make segment 4/4 more complete and contextual, against the story of adjustment and resilience we had so far seen before then.

And what a story of adjustment and resilience we had gotten, as Day had established a full career for himself, without Mhok next to him, during one of the time jumps of episode 12.

For my sake, as I process what I watched this weekend, I want to come to grips with what I thought were the major themes of this show, and see if I can come to some sort of sensible conclusion about what happened here.

This show was focused on:

1) the romance between Day and Mhok, 2) Mhok's caretaking and companionship being the lever to help Day out of his room and back into the world from which he had retreated after the onset of his visual impairment, 3) Day slowly learning how to function again in a society that prioritizes the able-bodied vis à vis his visual impairment, 4) Day learning how to self-advocate for himself in the face of those who condescend to him and/or keep him trapped in compassion bias postures,

and more that I'm sure I'm missing, but those are the themes that resonated the most with me.

I think the general feeling on Tumblr is that, save for the romance, that themes 3 and 4 were contradicted out of existence in the face of the sudden flip to the surgery of segment 4/4.

I think not hearing from Day himself that he was ready and willing for the surgery was a lost moment. I don't believe Day was ever acting as if he would choose anything else OTHER than surgery throughout the series. BUT, AT THE SAME TIME: what we had watched prior to 4/4 was his story of adjustment.

My biggest ethical concern here, vis à vis the audience reactions that I've read, is that NO ONE -- in fiction or in real life -- owes me a story of heroism. If there is an individual who has been impaired since birth, or is dealing with a degenerative condition later in their life, and has the opportunity to address or reverse the condition, who am I to say that that individual SHOULD NOT address their condition?

For me, this is huge. I believe this is a huge ethical dilemma that Last Twilight ultimately does not face. I wish this series had been much more centered, earlier on, about the utter REALITY that Day could have his condition reversed by surgery, in words he'd say himself, rather than assumptions made for him, on behalf of his family, who.... I presume were established to be some sort of legal conservators for him, as Mhon continued to be the one to receive eye donation text messages.

(I concede that I don't know if this is a more common set-up for disabled individuals in Thailand, as I would assume in the States, that Day himself would have been the one to receive that message directly.)

For this show to have seemed emotionally and artistically complete: I needed to hear from Day himself that surgery was an endgame that he was banking his hopes on. I also needed to understand, much more statistically clearly vis à vis the show, of the absolute risks that Day faced towards having permanent blindness for the rest of his life. Because the show ALSO needed to focus on the establishment of the romance between Mhok and Day, we missed out on the show taking time to explain to us, the viewers, of the absolute risks that Day faced in any of these scenarios -- and thus, we would have had MUCH more context into the nuances of the resilience that Day needed to establish for himself as he re-adjusted to society, with his numerous fates lying before him.

I'm going to borrow the words of @hallowpen in their final review here, to say that this show at the end needed much more "breathing room." I think @hallowpen is so right in saying it like this, because these two factors that I just laid out, geez -- the first 7/8ths of the series being about Day's social adjustment against the utter suddenness of the successful surgery and his sudden jump back to what's been translated as his "normal life" -- just clash so tonally. (I do wonder if we're getting as nuanced a translation on "normal" as we could be.)

I think this is about the most confused final review of a show that I've written. There is an ethical heaviness to all of this that's weighing on me, that I think I still need time to comb through.

I also feel that I simply do not know enough, by way of my lack of cultural competency into how Thai society approaches issues of public and private health, if Day’s unseen choice to get the surgery would have been a given among majority Thai audiences, AND that majority Thai audiences would not have asked for the kind of internal debates that I think the show could have used.

I feel thrilled that Day can see Poomjai/Mee, after making that wish in episode 11.

But I think, if this show was about a journey for someone to learn how to successfully advocate for his own agency -- that, at the very end, I needed to see that agency exercised, by him, to get to the part of the reversal of the impairment that I assumed he wanted.

Again: Day doesn't owe me his story of heroism. If fiction doesn't want to give me that, from a character with a recent impairment, I don't have the right to ask for it.

But the missing bits of artistry to get me, the viewer, to only an assumption, has led me to surprising ethical places, that will leave me wondering about what happened in this series for a long time.

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thatgirl4815 · 4 months

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So you've seen everything you want to see? Not yet. There's still one last image.

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thatgirl4815 · 4 months

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“You are Poseidon’s son.”

“I am Sally Jackson’s son!”

YEAH YOU TELL EM PERCY FUCK A DEADBEAT DAD

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thatgirl4815 · 4 months

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657 days since Not Me final episode and here I am still desperate for a Black spin-off.

#gmmtv had an opportunity and they missed it #not me #not me the series #offgun #seanwhite #thai bl #off jumpol #gun atthaphan

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thatgirl4815 · 4 months

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10 BL Boys That I Want Carnally

Thx for the tag @thegalwhorants and @waitmyturtles! It's funny how whenever I do these games every BL man I have ever drooled over immediately leaves my mind, lol. I'm sure I'm missing people who would make a great addition to this list. But in no particular order…

1. Sand and 2. Ray

I’m including them as a pair because they come as one. Together or separately, both characters are 🔥 and I would die for either of them in my own way. Do I want them carnally? 100%, absolutely, without a doubt. I would commit arson for them. I would burn down mount Olympus for them. I would take a dip in the river Styx for them. (Can you tell I’m in my Percy Jackson phase rn?)

3. Mork

He’s the ideal. I love him. I will never not be in love with him. They say he’s not a romantic but he totally is, and adding Jimmy’s hotness on top of it all…whew.

4. Porsche

Idk what else to say other than Apo’s profile is perfection and Porsche was a slightly-annoying-but-still-admirable goofball who just so happened to be intensely hot.

5. Phayu

I had a Boss phase. His motorcycle racer vibes are unmatched, and the little bun he wore? No one can pull it off like him.

6. Vee

I know, I know, he’s problematic. The cheating was bad. He was in crisis, and I know that doesn’t excuse it, but Yin is hot enough that I am willing to overlook it. Also, I have been in a debate with my friend for a year now that he bears a significant resemblance to Yeonjun from TXT.

7. Sarawat

Is this the basic answer? Absolutely. I think 2gether is overrated, and while I enjoyed it at the time, I don't think it lives up to the hype anymore BUT Bright's profile certainly does. He fits this prompt too well.

8. Phaya

Idk why I keep talking about the actors so much over the characters, but I have to preface this by saying that I hated SCOY and War of Y was not much better (the part that I did watch) but Billy has never let me down. It also helps that Billy is one of the BL actors that knows how to act like he wants to devour people (didn't think I'd ever be saying those words in my life but here we are).

9. Black

Look, Gun as a nice guy is great, but Gun as a rebellious gang leader? I'm all for it. I only wish Black would've gotten more screen time. Or like a spin off.

10. Kiyoi

Finally leaving the Thai BL sphere for a moment. Kinda hate his hair styling but his face is 10/10, and I completely understand why anyone would have an obsession with him.

I think I'm kinda late to this one so if you're seeing this, consider yourself tagged! :)

#tag game #bl tag game

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