touch me while your bros play team fortress - taylor swift if she was awesome

and god said to the angels: the age of prophets has come to a close. Speak not to mortal men, unless they get high enough. Then it's fine.

WE'RE LIVE!!!

Currently doing some last minute soundchecks, stream will start when the clock hits XX:30! Come join me, @the-seelie-court-official, @madmonksandmaenads, AND SURPRISE GUEST @radiofreederry as I start to play Pokémon Emerald Run & Bun! I really hope to see y'all there!

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This porno didn’t fuck around

LIVE TONIGHT ON TWITCH!

Hello everyone! It's been a hot minute since I was able to stream, but I'll be going back in the saddle tonight to start raising funds to move out of my current situation and into a better one! I need to raise $2,000 USD to be able to cover my share of the deposit. To do that I'll be doing my best to stream more regularly for fundraising, as well as a few other special incentives I'll be revealing soon 👀😏 But more on that later!

As the meme implies, I'll be playing Pokémon Emerald Run & Bun, a difficulty hack of the classic Pokémon Emerald blind! Apparently this is considered one of the hardest difficulty hacks around at the moment and clearly I need to Test My Abilities as a True PokéGamer or something.

I'll be going live at 6:30PM Mountain Time (8:30PM Eastern, 12:30AM GMT) and I'll be cohosting with @the-seelie-court-official and @madmonksandmaenads!!!

I really hope to see y'all there at http://twitch.tv/thesaintlaika

"is sex with angels monsterfucking" forum thread shut down by moderators after 300 pages of fierce debate, 26 banned accounts and 8 doxxed members

new heresy that makes the bible way funnier:

god genuinely had no idea that people would be able to disobey him, when he made them. angels couldn’t! everything in the universe was just an extension or a reflection of god himself, operating in perfect mechanical order. then he put a spark of his own creative consciousness in an animal and it turned out it could disobey him.

like, that’s why he told adam and eve not to access a perfectly accessible tree. nothing else in the universe up until that point would have done something he told them not to.

that’s why he asks cain a perfectly ridiculous question, given that he would have watched the murder happen right in front of him: where is your brother? what did you do to him? he didn’t know cain could lie. even when adam and eve disobeyed him, surprising absolutely everyone involved, they hadn’t figured out lying yet. cain figured out lying.

that’s why god decides to destroy humans and start over only a few centuries later. he has no idea what to do. not only are people disobeying and lying to him, they’ve started completely ignoring him, too. he can control the wind, the water, the plants, the animals, the angels, the heavens, the earth. but he cut a part of himself loose and gave it to this totally unique new critter and now he can’t get it back. he can’t make anyone do anything, and now they know it. he had to carve humanity back down to the one family that actually, for whatever reason, still listened to him, and he had to ride them pretty fucking hard from that point onward to make sure they didn’t just….. stop. because at any point basically any human, ever, even the ones who liked him, could just randomly decide to fuck off and do their own thing.

then like, according to christians, god thought maybe he could get a handle on whatever the fuck was going on with how bad humans were being by making another human who had even more god in him than all the other humans, and that didn’t work either. and also even jesus himself didn’t know what humans were going to do next, which was kill him young. like, god had to break the news to him based on an educated guess, and it was a big surprise to him! he was really upset! there’s a whole scene!

like, i think this is hands down the funniest fucking thing to conclude about god ever. he didn’t know it was going to turn out like this when he started and he didn’t know what to do when it did. he’s been basically scrambling to stay on top of the situation for six thousand years and he’s totally beefed it repeatedly.

god the omnipotent lord of creation knows everything, except what you’re going to do next. god the supreme ruler of the universe can do anything, except stop you. you have a little piece of god inside you and it lets you defy the most fundamental machinery of existence basically whenever you like.

if that’s not funny, i don’t know what is.

(SOUND IS CRUCIAL) this video is has murdered me dead the music the editing the way information is slowly revealed about the two of them the plot twist the breaking bad images. WILLIAM WILLIAM WILLIAM. all over minecraft parkour someone help im seizing

i mean this in the best way possible, i believe if you were a salad you'd just be a kilogram of lettuce leaves and 1 paper thin cucumber slice hidden somewhere in the middle

next time just slit me open from throat to taint