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talkshitgetcrit · 2 months
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Oh my god.
I was head cannoning one of my favourite guilty pleasures - poor sassy female journalist and spoiled rich bratty guy during the Industrial Revolution - and I was brainstorming how he could insult her outfit and.
And my brain only supplied “damn girl this coat has more stitches than a viral TikTok”
I turned my 19th century useless dandy into a gay time traveler, I think?
Okay. OKAY. So no Cinderella love story. That’s fine.
And while that is a great dynamic that means we actually need a story. And I have just the one!
Our time traveler notes that things Aren’t Looking So Great, and basically he is worried that HE fucked things up because why are there basically maxi supremacists here now that go way over the usual racist colonial bs?!
Is it a butterfly effect thing? Did he accidentally turn the whole future facist?!
He and journalism girly turn this into a funny dark comedy slash planning some murdered thing, interspersed with classic romance set up that they both straight up ignore.
They break into the facist leaders house to kill him, only to be thwarted last minute.
But. But!!! They find out he is a time traveler too!!!
(Scene of them having unhinged twitter discourse while people from both sides scratch their heads and think: he golly this sure is a bit ballsy…)
Saving this here as a reminder bc I’m gonna go sleep now and don’t want to forget it
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talkshitgetcrit · 3 months
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Don’t mind me. Just thinking about how much I love my boyfriend.
And I need to scream into the void about how things in my life are straight out of a romance novels sometimes nowadays.
Yesterday somewhere past midnight, he was still wearing a tailored Armani suit, and I’m cuddled up in his side in my 15 year old snoopy pyjama.
Don’t get me wrong - I love it a lot more when things feel real. Like when I’m teasing him about how shitty his football team is, or he apologizes for showing up too early and me feeling out because I’m still in the middle of cleaning my apartment, and he doesn’t care for the mess.
If anything - I resent the moments in my life that feel like they would make Colleen Hoover go: “Yep. That’s romantic.”
But still - I need to scream them into the void because I have no one else to listen to goddamn.
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talkshitgetcrit · 4 months
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i saw the trailer for the new feel-good “anti-racist” US war movie about the carpet bombing of North Korea and started writing up something for this blog, partially inspired by the absolute shit storm i got for sharing that post i made with pictures of everyday life outside pyongyang
and then i gave up, because what’s the point? westerners can’t even handle a single picture of a north korean not looking miserable without screaming propaganda
meanwhile, there are no stories about the horrors of life in the ‘hermit kingdom’ that are deemed too outlandish to be believable. i can’t remember who said it, but it’s like the entire country has taken up permanent residence in the western imaginary as some silly little cartoon villain, where the leaders of the country does evil things for no discernible reason. they’re just silly and evil like that, and the citizens, of course, are silly, too. silly and brainwashed.
i watched a video recently of a tourists visiting an auto dealership in pyongyang, and the entire time he was just gawking at the employees and costumers, shoving his phone in their face, and confidently explaining to his youtube audience that everyone he’s interacting with are actually actors.
what level of dehumanization do you have to reach for that thought to even cross your mind? to think that the people you see before you are actors? that entire cities and shops are erected with to sole purpose that you, a western, will see them and be impressed?
what frustrates me the most is the casual cruelty that seeps into any mention of north korea, no matter how small. if north koreans are not being evil, they’re being silly.
a north korean newspaper reports that a group of archeologists in pyongyang have discovered an old rock carving with the words ‘unicorn lair’ (mistranslated), and the western press reports that north koreans now believe in unicorns.
a tourist at a hotel in hamhung is told by the receptionist to be careful at the beach: the waves can get high. that day the tourists goes to the beach, and there are no waves. she retells the story to her instagram followers, explaining that the poor woman at the hotel could never have seen real waves before because north koreans are probably never allowed to travel.
she adds a little teary-eyed emoji.
one of the cities i included in the post was sariwon, a densely populated city to the south of pyongyang. below are some pictures from its “folk customs street”, which was built to showcase old korean traditions and customs
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here’s all wikipedia has to say about it
Built to display an ideal picture of ancient Korea, it includes buildings in the “historical style” and a collection of ancient Korean cannons. Although it is considered an inaccurate romanticized recreation of an ancient Korean street, it is frequently used as a destination for foreigners on official government tours. Many older style Korean buildings exist in the city.
it’s just north koreans being silly again. there’s no mention of what might motivate them to build a street like that — why the preservation of old customs, culture and architecture might somehow be important for the city
could it perhaps have something to do with how the U.S. air force dropped 635,000 tons of bombs, including 32,557 tons of napalm, over the korean peninsula during the war? the carpet bombings, which are now the topic of an upcoming hollywood movie about overcoming racism through warcrimes, destroyed an estimate of 85% of all buildings in north korea. some cities were entirely wiped off the map.
in sariwon they missed a few buildings, but not many — after an intense firebombing campaign the U.S. military estimated the destruction of sariwon to be at 95%.
none of this is mentioned on the wikipedia page for sariwon.
we destroyed entire cities. memory-holed the entire thing, called it the forgotten war. and now, 70 years later, we’re convincing ourselves that the people living in the ruins are actors.
and somehow the north koreans are the brainwashed ones
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talkshitgetcrit · 7 months
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This is now my own private diary because I need to write this down, but I am also born and raised on being almost terminally online, so OF COURSE I need an audience.
Did I mention that he rarely uses his phone and how hot that is?
Anyways.
I met his parents.
So, how did that go?
According to him absolutely splendidly and they LOVE me.
Which, you know, not to toot my own horn, but I’m pretty cute. Wide doe eyes, pretty constantly smiling, a good listener and always ready to gently, lovingly make fun of people I care about.
I think his mom also felt really bad for scaring me, basically, so they were very set on giving us our space, and even let us have the lakeside property for the afternoon.
So, we just swam, made out in the water, lazed around in the sun and realized once more how BAD we are at JUST cuddling and kissing, without getting our hands all over each other and under our clothes.
He was very much a gentleman at keeping his hands to himself on our walk back to his parents’ place, and there we had a nice chat and coffee with them and later on dinner.
Afterwards we -just the two of us - grabbed our wine glasses and went outside to their garden pavilion and pond, and it was absolute magic. Candlelight, more making out, cuddling.
At that point my “taller half” as I privately call him as my little joke has set his mind on skinny dipping in the lake, so we grabbed our towels and did just that.
The wind has picked up, it wasn’t really stormy but there was sheet lightning over the lake, but still super warm.
It felt very much like we were in some lovely coastal area in the Mediterranean.
Full disclosure?
Okay, full disclosure; we had sex, and it was pretty much magic.
The weather, feeling the warmth of each other’s skin, giggling and laying down flat to hide the few times we heard cars come by on the road.
Well, I was giggling, he was complaining. That’s one of my favorite things about him, because I just don’t get it; he LOVES to complain.
I think it’s the same the other way around; I’m always positive and don’t let anything ruin my mood.
We are the literal grumpy and sunshine trope, and we both find the other’s way of acting utterly fascinating.
Case in point; we walked the dog the next morning and it was pouring, and of course we hadn’t brought an umbrella.
He was complaining, I was gently poking fun at him, using the chance to make out in the rain and talk about how excited I was for a hot cup of tea once we got home.
We played some computer games (both of us are also nerdy af) and then went out for lunch with his parents, which was super nice.
Afterwards, we went to another flat they have in the next big city, because I was invited to a party that evening and also … privacy.
Maybe you noticed that I actually wasn’t too blown away by the wealth disparity until then.
But that flat. That flat fucking ended me. I tried to keep it together, but I felt super awkward and just kind of out of it for the first few hours being there.
Like. This is one of the most expensive cities in Europe. I know people who pay 1000+ euros for one-room apartments there.
And his family just has a flat there in a turn of the century building, wonderful old wooden floors, high ceilings with stucco on them, and amazing interior design that would make Pinterest blanch und envy.
Needless to say, I felt TERRIBLY out of place.
So, he stayed back while I went to the birthday party, all the time milling over these very conflicting emotions.
I realized several things; just the thought of going back to that flat made me feel uncomfortable for some reason. Like actual, real dread.
But also, even though I spent a lovely evening with friends I much rather would have been with him. And the closer I got to home, the more I was just filled with anticipation and didn’t care about anything else.
Notice how I said ‘home’?.
Yeah, that’s not that flat, or my flat, or another place. That’s him.
I pretty much sprinted up the last stairs and threw my arms around him.
I think he was a bit surprised, but really happy to see me.
I also tried to explain it to him that evening; sure, that stuff is amazing. If it wasn’t for his flat there, I would have had to take public transport for 1+ hour back to my place.
It’s comfortable, it’s luxurious and makes things so much more easy.
But also it makes me feel so out of my depth.
I’m used to being the one who is financially comfortable, who sometimes pays for her friends who are struggeling.
And he needs to let me pick up the bill half the time because otherwise I will go crazy.
He joked about how technically he is the broke student, and I’m the one with the well-paying job, it’s only his parents who have money, so technically I can be his sugar mommy.
I rolled my eyes and complained, but it did make me feel better, and that has now become a bit of a staple joke in our relationship already.
Next day we went on a long walk in the park of a nearby castle, went home ( and had sex), went out to a fancy Italian restaurant, I paid, we went home (and had sex. And I joked about how he really is worth his money, and what a good sugar baby he is.)
Also, over dinner and a bottle of wine we had a pretty heated discussion. I dropped out of university in my third year, and he just doesn’t get it.
It’s a bit annoying because he is so sure I made the wrong decision, I couldn’t help but grin and love him even more through the whole thing. Because I’m awfully glad that the concept of “mental health issues” apparently is non-existent for this man.
Like, I wouldn’t wish the issues I had on anybody, and I just hope he isn’t confronted with any such struggles soon. And if he is - I hope I can be at his side through it all.
That was probably my favorite evening with him so far, because I’m between dinner and bed we just lazed around in the living room for hours and did some real, honest talking;
About sex, about our families, about what we like most and least about each other, and how even the not so pretty parts and annoying habits we are in love with.
About how both of us are a bit scared of just how much we have fallen in love, about how he is scared of - well, a great many things. If our relationship will hold up being separated for the next 4 years. If I change my mind and decide he is too young and I need to move forward in life.
That’s not a good point to end this update, but this keeps coming back up, because of course it does.
I’m naive. I’m a live in the moment kind of person. I have no need to check off important life milestones. I don’t know how I will feel in 42 years, or 4, or even 6.
I don’t know if this is forever. But it’s for now. And that is so much more important.
PS: his birthday is next week and I’m still looking for a gift, and I just can’t come up with anything good. I really hope inspiration strikes soon.
I haven’t posted anything on here in MONTHS but I just need to scream into the void a little bit.
So, apparently love is actually real and I feel like I’m living in a Jane Austen novel right now, including the whole social drama aspect, because his parents are SO RICH and I think they are scared that I am a gold digger. They want to meet me on Monday and I am already scared.
And don’t get me wrong - I don’t need any man’s money - (okay, except my dads, maybe).
I have my own flat (given to me by my parents), my own car (rinse and repeat) and I’ll start a job next month that actually pays well.
But! Because I am an idiot and I know the area their mansion by the lakeside is in is expensive, I checked and… a single meter of land there is more expensive than my 2 week summer vacation to Greece this year.
But, what can I say, even if I’m scared they won’t like me I just want to do whatever it takes to stay with him.
I was fully set on staying single forever, living an awesome life with my closest friends, full of fun, love and vacations.
And then HE came along and put my whole world in jeopardy.
One evening at a party neither of us initially wanted to go to, with our lives being so far removed from each other that it looks like a complicated piece of engineering by the universe, contrived for us to met.
One date that was pretty much perfect, before he traveled half around the world for 3 weeks.
It really felt very romcom, waking up to texts from him, making sure to get up early and him staying up late so we could talk on the phone for a few minutes once per week.
I have to get on my tiptoes to kiss him because he is so tall, and he likes to pick me up and carry me around, while I’m usually clinging to him and screeching into his ears that I’m too heavy and he’ll break his back or something.
We broke my bed the second night he stayed over. I even like to listen to him talk about sports, and I hate sports. But he has that cute smile, and he uses “we” when he talks about his favourite team.
He tells me how pretty I am every time I’m undressing.
When I pulled down my zipper after our date a few days ago he whined “nooo, ive been looking forward to doing that the whole evening!”, and I let him do it but also my poor heart has not recovered since.
I love him, I LOVE HIM, and I hate that he is going abroad for 4 years in a little over a month.
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talkshitgetcrit · 7 months
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I haven’t posted anything on here in MONTHS but I just need to scream into the void a little bit.
So, apparently love is actually real and I feel like I’m living in a Jane Austen novel right now, including the whole social drama aspect, because his parents are SO RICH and I think they are scared that I am a gold digger. They want to meet me on Monday and I am already scared.
And don’t get me wrong - I don’t need any man’s money - (okay, except my dads, maybe).
I have my own flat (given to me by my parents), my own car (rinse and repeat) and I’ll start a job next month that actually pays well.
But! Because I am an idiot and I know the area their mansion by the lakeside is in is expensive, I checked and… a single meter of land there is more expensive than my 2 week summer vacation to Greece this year.
But, what can I say, even if I’m scared they won’t like me I just want to do whatever it takes to stay with him.
I was fully set on staying single forever, living an awesome life with my closest friends, full of fun, love and vacations.
And then HE came along and put my whole world in jeopardy.
One evening at a party neither of us initially wanted to go to, with our lives being so far removed from each other that it looks like a complicated piece of engineering by the universe, contrived for us to met.
One date that was pretty much perfect, before he traveled half around the world for 3 weeks.
It really felt very romcom, waking up to texts from him, making sure to get up early and him staying up late so we could talk on the phone for a few minutes once per week.
I have to get on my tiptoes to kiss him because he is so tall, and he likes to pick me up and carry me around, while I’m usually clinging to him and screeching into his ears that I’m too heavy and he’ll break his back or something.
We broke my bed the second night he stayed over. I even like to listen to him talk about sports, and I hate sports. But he has that cute smile, and he uses “we” when he talks about his favourite team.
He tells me how pretty I am every time I’m undressing.
When I pulled down my zipper after our date a few days ago he whined “nooo, ive been looking forward to doing that the whole evening!”, and I let him do it but also my poor heart has not recovered since.
I love him, I LOVE HIM, and I hate that he is going abroad for 4 years in a little over a month.
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talkshitgetcrit · 8 months
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[Hedge funds are taxed at 14%.]
It's weird how people who romanticize the past because of awesome infrastructure, good paying jobs, and the "American Dream" conveniently forget that we used to tax the rich people/corporations to make that happen.
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talkshitgetcrit · 9 months
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Alright.
You ready for a hard 'tag your oc' challenge?
Tag an oc who doesn't have childhood trauma. At all. Who's family is still alive.
I'll wait.
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talkshitgetcrit · 9 months
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Alright pals rb with the favorite oc names you have! Not necessarily favorite ocs, just the fav names you've given (a) character(s) :]
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talkshitgetcrit · 9 months
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I’m just gonna shout into the void bc I don’t know what else to do - none of my friends are into HotD.
I have an Aemond fic, and I need another opinion/ someone to just read the first scene and tell me their general impression.
I’ve been out of the loop so I really have no idea how to get in contact with other fanfic writers etc.
It’s still a rough draft, but this is going to be very plot heavy and maybe with some suspense, and I want to know if it comes across that way.
Usually I’m more of a comedy kind of gal so that’s why I’m asking.
Anybody who is willing to give it a look over or maybe a retweet, or maybe can just recommend me a place to meet other writers is greatly appreciated! <3
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talkshitgetcrit · 9 months
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A friend of mine having the only possible reaction to me explaining my newest fandom crush
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talkshitgetcrit · 10 months
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wait im curious
this is excluding special circumstances (after going swimming, after doing a hairstyle with lots of product, before/after getting your hair done, etc)!
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talkshitgetcrit · 10 months
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Being older is weird - so let’s play a game about it!
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talkshitgetcrit · 10 months
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I’m just going to put this out there but Poker Face is the best new show I’ve seen in years. Genuinely, wildly original. Natasha Lyonne is playing a woman named Charlie who can tell when people are lying. She’s fleeing dangerous people, so she ends up (accidentally) solving crimes on the run. She can’t help herself. Everything is surprising. The writing is flawless. Half the joy is in Charlie’s cash-only odd jobs. 
All the famous people are there, too: Nick Nolte, Chloe Sevigny, Ellen Barkin, Adrian Brody, Tim Meadows, Benjamin Bratt, S. Epatha Merkerson, Judith Light, Simon Helberg, John Ratzenberger, Cherry Jones, etc. I’ve still got one episode left (I’m hoarding it like the last chocolate in the house). You could tell me the Pope and Meryl Streep both show up in the finale, I would believe you, and the episode would be AMAZING. 
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talkshitgetcrit · 10 months
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If you like Murder She Wrote, Columbo, Hercule Poirot mysteries and Knives Out/Glass onion?
Go watch Poker Face.
Natasha Lyonne as a human lie detector stumbling into random murders and calling bullshit til she catches the killer.
It's just so much damn fun!
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talkshitgetcrit · 10 months
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talkshitgetcrit · 10 months
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@pscentral event 11: 2023 releases Poker Face :: January 26 2023
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talkshitgetcrit · 10 months
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POKER FACE 1.08 The Orpheus Syndrome
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