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#yes i am going to be one of those people who will die first in ANY apocalypse
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okay very brief munich gig report (mostly under the cut) i probably am forgetting 90% of stuff but let's goooo:
i got EE and i was there by 10 am? i was number 39 and i was pretty okay with this. i did end up getting a really good spot anyway
munich queue 💜💜 i mean, i've already made a post about meeting all of you, but it was truly lovely. i got so many gifts and bracelets! this fandom is full of talented, kind people
the soundcheck was ngvot (every single time i've been to a show i've heard ngvot at some point lol) and vem da greš, both of which i really enjoyed
I GOT TO GIVE NACE MY GIFTS!! like i don't even think he heard what i said BUT THEY'RE WITH THEM. FINALLY. i can be at peace now lol
i really enjoyed both Sector 5 and JC Stewart! they were both pretty good openers! i hadn't heard any of their music before, but i still had fun
WE STARTED WITH KATRINA WHICH I WAS SUPER HAPPY ABOUT
AND I GOT BELE SANJEEEEEE. and bojan said we nailed it the first time which had me like "duh, ofc, i'm here????" I WOULD NEVER FUCK UP MY BELOVED BELE SANJE
we got both Šta bih ja & Schlager. i really really really wanted Bluza so hopefully in london 🤞 i enjoy Schlager more that i've listened to it live lol (and jance were very cute during this song)
on the topic of jance, everyone was mentioning the nacekris was strong last night but as someone who was right in front of jance and barely got to see the others honestly it was kinda hard for me lmao i didn't get those vibes at all. i was so shocked opening tumblr hahahaha. jance were super sweet and smiley and 🥺💕 a solid 95% of what i captured was them and i can assure you they were both very soft and happy
no pijano :((( but he did help bojan at the start of EW and it was very sweet, i love them so much
bojan spit on me. better said, he spit on jan but i was, well, right in front of him, so i got it too lmfao
during the UM bojan was also right in front of me because a little girl got to sing with him (and even went on stage!!!!) and then a super sweet 15yo girl who had her birthday yesterday also got to sing UM - i was next to both of them so i saw bojan VERY WELL. he didn't actually go into the crowd this time
during novi val i made a finger heart at nace AND HE SMILED AND DID ONE BACK AT ME. i know it was for me because everyone got the half hearts lmfao (and then @flananjan told me you could see the heart in a story they posted on their insta and i almost died on the subway back to the hotel)
at some point (i can't remember before which song but i'll probably figure it out when i look at the photos) i put my portuguese flag on stage and jan picked it up 🥺🥺 he then asked me in the softest fucking voice "Portugal?" and i was able to say two entire words to him "yes, Portugal" AND I DIDN'T EVEN DIE ON THE SPOT. he then placed it down and like idk i just!!!! jan knows i exist and i'm portuguese BYE
and when i thought the night just couldn't... well, get any better, JAN GAVE ME HIS PICK. his hand was warm and like way softer than i expected??? this is now my most prized possession. i literally CANNOT believe jan peteh himself gave this to me
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the boys didn't come out at the end because they were tired, apparently??? but i was still very happy about all of this. i'm now way less stressed for london (because i won't be carrying around a bag full of stuff for them omgggg) and manifesting i get to meet them then 🙏
munich, thank you for having me 💜💜💜 i can't wait to come back
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myfictionaldreams · 6 months
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Day 6: Dry Hump- James Potter
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Summary: James Potter was your best friend, and he was unequivocally in love with Lily Evans. However, he has one secret he trusts only with you: he’s never kissed anyone.
Tags: 18+ readers only, smut, inexperienced James & experienced Reader, friends with benefits vibes, kissing/making out, dry humping, cumming in pants, teasing, nearly caught
Part 2!
masterlist 📚 
kinktober masterlist😈 
AO3 Link 
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James Potter was your best friend. He had many best friends, including the other Marauders and fellow Gryffindors, but he was YOUR best friend and had been since the first year at Hogwarts. James was the one person you always ran to and shared all happy memories with; if you needed cheering up, he’d be the only one who could pull a smile to your lips. It had always been just the two of you until he became infatuated with Lily Evans.
It had been years of hearing about how wonderful Lily was, which you knew anyway as she was your friend. Finally, you convinced her to say yes to one date with James, even though she did wait until everyone was finishing their time at Hogwarts and about to graduate. He’d waited long enough, and you were thrilled to see him getting his dream date.
This was until he casually announced one day, “I’ve never kissed anyone”.
He’d mumbled it to himself under his breath. James had gone from pure exhilarated joy to fear and doubt at the weight he’d put on his shoulders for having to be the perfect date for Lily. You’d taken him to the Shrieking Shack to try and get away from everyone else so that James could blow off some steam, but all he’d done so far was sulk in his armchair and stare into the fire whilst waiting for Sirius and Remus to join after their lesson.
Then, out of the blue, he admitted his secret that he had yet to kiss anyone. A frown dawns on you as you turn away from the book in your hand to inspect the messy-haired Marauder next to you visually. “What?” you asked with a hint of uncertainty as if he was telling the truth, “How have you never kissed anyone before?” Your mind raced to all of the parties in the Gryffindor tower where most people, including yourself, had made out with others, but now that you thought about it, you’d never seen James lip-locked with anyone else.
It was James’ turn to frown as he looked at you blankly, “When would I have had time? I’ve just wanted to be with Lily, and she’s always said no when I’ve asked before. Anyway, I don’t see why you’re saying it in that tone; it’s not like you’ve been kissing loads of people”. You give James a tight-lipped smile to show that he was, in fact, very wrong with that statement. His eyes widen as he realises the truth, “Wait, you have? Since when?”
“James, how can you be shocked? I’ve kissed plenty of people before, especially during those parties with the fire whiskey that Sirius always steals for us. You wander off with the Marauders or fawn over Lily, and what am I supposed to do? Stand on my own? Absolutely not, I go and find some fun”.
Your best friend’s mouth drops open in shock. Still, he quickly covers it up by looking away grumpily, “Great, so I’m the only person in our year who hasn’t kissed anyone, and now, I’m going to take Lily out, and she’s going to refuse to see me again because I don’t know what I’m doing, we’re going to finish school, and I’ll never see her again, and I’ll die alone!”.
You couldn’t help but laugh at his over-the-top rant, shutting the book with a loud snap and facing him completely whilst still in your chair. “James, you need to chill out a bit; I’m sure it’ll be fine. Do you really think Lily’s been going around snogging loads of boys? I’m sure she’s just as inexperienced as you”.
James’ shoulders dropped in relief as he turned back towards you with hope in his hazel eyes, “Do you think so?”
Your face immediately gave it away that you’d been lying as you sighed, “Ok, I might have seen her making out with a Ravenclaw a year ago, but still, I wouldn’t worry about it! You’ll be excellent! You’re James Potter, the Gryffindor King, a founding Marauder and Gryffindor Seeker. You can sure as hell make out with Lily Evans correctly”.
The pretty Marauder smiled thankfully at your dramatic declaration, “That’s true, thanks, Sweetheart”. Relaxing back into your seat, the book returned to your hand, assuming the conversation was officially over. However, only a moment later, James is whining pathetically, “But what if I’m not good? What if I hurt her or lick her wrong or-”.
“Lick? Why are you licking her, James? I thought we were on about kissing?”
“We are! But you know, people use tongues and-”
“James, I don’t know what you want me to say; if you’re that petrified with kissing, why don’t we practice a little so you can stop freaking out”. It took you a couple of long seconds before the offer you’d just given him genuinely dawned on you. You weren’t sure why you had said it, expecting him to say no but wishing for him to calm down and thinking this was the only option.
James’ head snapped towards you, giving his full attention as he asked, “Wait, you’d do that?” He pushed himself up off the chair's arms, and his eyes were wide and hopeful again.
Lowering the book, you spoke slowly, “Yeah, sure. I mean, it’s just a kiss, and at least we’re friends, so no feelings have to be involved”.
“Yeah, that's a good point! Okay, right, so, um, how do we do this? Do I come over to you, or do we stand?”
Sighing at James, you stood abruptly, dropping the book and strutting to him with arms swinging. The marauder sits up suddenly, taking his feet off the stool he had been resting on as he stares up at you with wide eyes that you can see the whites of his eyes beneath his glasses. “What are you doing?” He questions uncertainly as you straddle his lap without a word, your knees resting on either side of his toned thighs, your fingers slipping around his neck and interlocking at the base of his skull.
“I’m going to kiss you, James. Is that alright with you?” You didn’t mean to sound sassy as you asked with a single raised questioning eyebrow, but you also needed to make sure that he was happy for this to continue.
Those two wide hazel eyes stared at your lips, licking his own to moisten as he slowly nodded, “Uh yeah, just tell me what to do.” A pang of sympathy rushed through your chest at seeing James becoming nervous, which was not usually a sight that you had to see as he was usually such a confident, happy person. You would have spent some time to explain that it was normal to be nervous during your first kiss, but you didn’t want to allow any more time for him to freak out, so loosening your intern locked fingers, you moved them to cup each of her freshly shaved cheeks and pressed your lips delicately against his. You wanted it to be quick enough that he didn’t even have time to tense, even though he did proceed to lock up as you moved back to assess his reaction.
“See, it’s not so scary. You’re supposed to enjoy this, James”. Thankfully, as your face lowered once more, he forced himself to take a steadying breath and relax the tension in his muscles as your lips caressed his.
They were softer than you’d anticipated, plump and smooth like a pillow and instantly, your eyes and his close. However, James surprised you by moving his first. His hand lifted and rested on your hip so gently that you hardly felt it until he gave your body a little squeeze to test the waters of how much he could get into the moment. So you rewarded him by pressing your face harder against his, lips beginning to move and rubbing against each other on instinct.
James even amazed himself with how naturally and quickly he could make out with you. Tilting your head, you deepened the kiss, nose pressing into his cheek so that you could smell his skin that had remnants of his aftershave, which was always spicy and woodsy. As the air became necessary, you pulled back enough to take deep, greedy breaths, now noticing he was doing the same thing but looking up at you with half-lidded eyes.
“So what did you think-”
James didn’t allow your sentence to finish as his other hand cupped along your jaw, pulling your face closer again until the two of you kissed with much more heat with the movements. His mouth opened wider to match how yours was moving against his; your heartbeat quickened as you leaned further into his tall, warm body, melting into his touch and kiss.
Then you wanted to take a risk and licked his bottom lip, which you were ultimately greeted with a praising deep groan of satisfaction that vibrated James’ entire chest and sent tingles straight to your core.
Ok, wow, you thought as James attempted and succeeded with his own lick back against your tongue; you were definitely getting turned on by this. As if he was reading your mind, James pressed harder on your hips, willing you to move down, which you did, your skirt pushing up on your thighs so that when you sat on his crotch, your panty-covered pussy was flush against the material of his trousers.
As one, the two of you pulled away from each other. Mainly because you were now sitting on his very hard erection and also because he knew you could feel his evidence of being aroused. You both stare at each other with wide, unblinking eyes, lips slightly swollen and the taste of his spit still on your tongue.
However, you didn’t want to stop and awkwardly sit back in your seat, and he wasn’t rushing to push you off, either. You were horny, and so was he. Yes, James Potter was your best friend, but that didn’t have to matter; you just wanted him to enjoy the moment and show that it wasn’t as scary as he thought.
Enough time passed, and if he didn’t want to continue, he would have said something by now, so you took the opportunity to lean back in, your thumb attempting to soothe him, stroking across his cheek in timid circles. As your mouths reconnected, your hips ground down on his crotch. You were hoping that he knew enough about anatomy to tell that the warmth from your pussy was a sign of arousal, wanting him to know you were just as turned on as he was.
You do it a few more times, rubbing back and forth with increasing pressure until James makes a pained noise that has you stopping altogether and checking in on him.
He’s looking everywhere but at you, as he apologises, “Sorry, it’s just these trousers are tight and rubbing me painfully”.
“You could just take them off”, you say once again, not thinking before you speak. James looks at you with dramatically wide eyes as he, too, realised what you’d just said. Quickly, you clarified, “I’m not saying that to have sex or anything; I just mean, we could kinda carry on doing what we are doing, but if your trousers are hurting, then just in your boxers”.
You’re surprised by his automatic response of a nod, yes, his arousal blocking all thoughts of Lily as he begins to undo his belt easily. Rising onto your knees to give him room, he pushed the offending material until his thighs were bare and his plaid boxers were on display, barely containing his length. Not wanting him to feel exposed, you lowered yourself once more, and both groaned at the contact, yours at a higher pitch as you could feel the entire outline of his cock against your cunt.
James was bigger than you’d thought and was currently pointing down his left thigh, so you angled your hips in this direction. Tilting your hips forward slightly, your clit grazed along his shaft, causing a hitch in your breath as it caused pleasure to pool in your abdomen, moisture slickening your hole with each movement.
You’re breathing just as heavily as he is, lips still moving against each other, exploring, tasting, needing more. You were kind of proud of him when he moved his face down your jaw, leaving open-mouthed kisses and causing more pleasure to pulse through you. You were half tempted to rise onto your knees again to show him the evidence of your arousal that had soaked through your panties and onto his boxers, but you didn’t want it to stop.
As your fingers delved into his messy black hair to hold his face closer, he thrust his hips up against yours to add to his stimulation. He was still apprehensive, so he didn’t push too hard, but he rocked back and forth until his tip was pressed against your clothed folds. The muscular thighs beneath yours tensed with each thrust, the muscles defined from all his years of playing quidditch.
His hands remained in place, one on the opposite side of your jaw to where his mouth still kissed, and the other hand helped to move your hips back and forth in time with his own ruts. You’d never actually gotten off like this with anyone before. Usually, underwear would be removed at this point, and more direct contact could occur, but it was still exciting to have some barriers between you. The lace of your underwear was quite rough against your most sensitive area, especially your engorged throbbing clit. You were sure to be sore afterwards, especially with the amount of pressure you were rubbing against each other; with each passing second, the need to find completion made you both desperate.
As his lips found yours again, his tongue began to delve and explore the hollow of your mouth, along your palate and even over your teeth; your pussy began to clench, fire blooming in your core with the impending release.
Pulling back, your fingers moved to rest on his shoulders to hold on tighter as you quickly moaned, “Please don’t stop; I’m going to cum”.
James moaned huskily, out of breath, but both of his hands were now on your hips, moving both his hips and yours faster to find his orgasm. Resting your forehead on his, you both shared the same area, still tasting the other in your mouths, sweat beginning to coat your faces. You were sure you could feel his own wet patch against your arse cheek from where precum was dribbling from his tip and staining his underwear. 
“Ah, fuck- James!” your head tilts back as you finally orgasm, thighs shaking and pussy fluttering around nothing. However, just as you were beginning to come down from your pleasurable high, James suddenly grabbed you painfully, both arms wrapping around your waist as he sat up further on the chair, nearly knocking you off of him if it wasn't for his grip around your midsection. Reassuringly your arms wrapped around his shoulders as his face nuzzled into your chest, his body shivering as thick spurts of cum soaked his boxers.
His moans were like music to your ears and sounded slightly pathetic, making you cling to him more, attempting to run your fingers through his hair to calm the crazy style, but to no avail. Your pussy felt like it was on fire due to the rough stimulation and the untouched orgasm, but it felt so good you savoured the sensation for a few minutes whilst trying to catch your breath.
“There you go, Potter. Not only have you kissed a girl for the first time, but you’ve also made her cum”.
James laughs, loosening his grip slightly to look up at you, but then you both hear the worst noise imaginable: voices from a few floors below, especially those of Sirius and Remus. You scrambled to your feet, straightening your clothes and sitting back in your chair, picking up the book and opening it to a random page as James pulled up his trousers, both of you ignoring the bodily juices completely.
James just about had his feet back on the footstool before Sirius and Remus walked in, but both immediately halted and looked between you and James. It was Sirius who spoke first, eyes squinting in accusation, “Why do you both look so guilty right now? What did you do?”
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dicetheroll · 10 months
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Solomon watches fondly from a distance, as you attempt to stop Mammon and Leviathan's bickering, before a bittersweet smile graces his features. You were so amazing, seamlessly fitting into the Devildom of the past and helping the brothers adjust to their new home with ease.
And he hates it.
It hurts him.
He knows that he never had a stand against all the demon brothers, who could give you the happiness he would be unable to. You considered them your closest loved ones, and would die for them.
He's content, really, with just being by your side.
Oh, but hardly does the solemn sorcerer know, you have been whipped for him ever since he gave you that shady little smile the first time you met at RAD. It was like a little adventure for you; the more people warned you about Solomon, the more insistent the urge to pursue him became.
It was almost as if the longer you watched him, the deeper you fell in love. You could almost see the knowledge of all humanity swimming in those eyes, and yet, sometimes even after that there would be a twinkling curiosity; how could someone who knew so much still yearn to know more?
How could his eyes be as warm as the earth and cool as the ocean at the same time?
You are aware of how Solomon thinks of himself in your eyes; that he doesn't deserve your company, and that he's okay with it.
And that makes you so angry.
You don't know if you want to put the fight back into Solomon; you've seen rare instances where a darkness would flicker behind his eyes, but never directed at you. It both excites and terrifies you.
Solomon enjoys this little charade— pretending you two are married and he relishes in the little shopping trips you two go on, letting his hands brush over yours as you examine a goblin-shaped ceramic mug.
You think you enjoy this even more than he does. It's exhilarating, having an almost-domestic life with him in secret. Solomon, the magic househusband; it sounds more than perfect, and you're thrilled to tell him another secret that he doesn't know yet.
"Let's get married." You fix your gaze on Solomon's hand, imagining what it would be like to slip a ring onto his finger.
A lack of response from the sorcerer makes you look up.
His face is contorted strangely— as if he's blinking back tears and deciding between a frown and a smile. "MC, do not say such things."
Disheartened, you whine. "Why not?"
"You don't understand, we can't get married." Solomon looks like he wants to say something else, but refrains from speaking.
You know what he's thinking. It's not that he doesn't want to, but there's something else stopping him. "Yes we can. We're both human, and we've known each other long enough. And if it wasn't clear before, I am in love with you. Extremely."
"MC…"
"You want this too, don't you Solomon? Why do you hesitate? Do you not feel the same way about me?"
"No!" Solomon interrupts, eyes widening. You can see the sorcerer tearing up, eyes lined with red. "It's not that, it's just…"
You hold both of his hands in yours. "Tell me."
"I wouldn't be able to bear it…I've wanted you for so long it hurts, and I wouldn't be able to stand it when you continue to age and then-"
"Solomon, I'm immortal now."
The sorcerer gives a bitter, cynical laugh. "Please do not toy with my feelings like this, MC." However, he feels something stir within his chest as you continue to look him in the eye, unwavering in your movements.
"Thirteen owed me a favour."
A sob rips itself from Solomon's throat. He doesn't know if it's out of joy, or horror.
What have you done?
You seem to read his mind, because you hold his face in your hands to prevent him from spiraling any further. "I will not outlive my loved ones, especially when my loved ones will live as long as me. I want to stay by your side, Solomon."
And for the first time in centuries, Solomon cries.
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chaoticace2005 · 1 month
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Reasons the Mothman should die, collectively written by the residents of the Hazbin Hotel:
Coding for Characters: Vaggie, Charlie, Pentious, Alastor, Niffty, Husk, pretty much everyone
TW: References to abuse
He’s holding back Angel’s progress. (Vaggie, is killing really necessary?) (I am concerned about going after a Vee)
I’m hungry (ALASTOR!)
Ms. Angel gets nervous when on the phone with him.
His coat is tacky.
He’s a bug! And bugs must be DESTROYED!
So Angel stops feeling like he has to be so damn fake. This is getting on my fucking nerves.
HE LICKED CHARLIE!!! (Vaggie, wait it’s okay.)
Color scheme sucks. Purple AND red?!
He makes Angel sad, NOBODY should make Angel sad.
Those obnoxious glasses just make him look stupid.
He’s a manipulative, abusive prick.
ANGEL DIDN'T KNOW BOUNDARIES WERE A THING?!?!?!?!?!? (Honestly that explains a lot.)
NOBODY deserves to be in an abusive relationship.
Too many arms. Nobody needs that many. (...Angel has that many?) (Well maybe he shouldn't.)
Ms. Angel keeps coming home all messy!!
He’s ruining hearts for everyone. Me and Angel already have enough. At least those are on our bodies, what’s his excuse?
Hearts should not even be ASSOCIATED with Valentino, THIS IS NOT LOVE.
I can do without all the sexual depravity. While I am in Hell this is NOT one of the reasons.
If I have to hear that ringtone one more damn time-
The Eggies found some of his films. They should never be exposed to such horrors. Now I have to explain what “a sex” is.
Makes picture shows that are a disgrace to the idea of “entertainment.”
He’s making a bad name for Uncle Ozzie. This is NOT “lust.”
So we don’t have to listen to another one of Angel’s pornos. (Agreed, it’s quite horrifying!!)
So Ms. Angel isn’t tired when she gets home and can save the kinky stuff for then :) (Niff, really?)
So the kid stops coming home with bruises and cuts that I fix up at 3 am. (Husk, what the fuck?)
Because what the FUCK Valentino?
He keeps forcing Angel to do drugs. (HE WHAT?! Like crack??) (That but also I’m pretty sure whatever comes out of him is an aphrodisiac.)
I want to use his antenna as a backscratcher
Has that whole red color thing going on. Only I am allowed to wear red :) (Al, your text isn’t even red.) (My what?)
What is up with his red spit and smoke? Seriously disgusting.
The red stuff from him may be what allows Velvette to create her “Love Potions” which funds Vax’s stupid endeavors (Do you mean Vox?) (Who?)
FOR MY COLLECTION :D (…yeah okay.)
Really is making a bad name for Overlords. And not in the fun way.
Angel’s shown trauma signs of abuse in our meetings. Im pretty sure it’s Valentino.
Make a doll out of his fur so I have a main villain for roach puppet shows!!!
His only purpose is to keep Veks occupied but considering Vixen’s inane attempts to catch my attention it isn’t working.
So Angel can have his soul and he and Husk can run off into the sunset together like in a fanfiction!!! (Ah, yes that would be nice.) (WE WHAT?!) (Oh Husker, denial doesn’t suit you.)
So Angel can get a good boyfriend THAT’S NOT ME to stop these bullshit allegations.
So Angel can admit his feelings to Husker because our cat surely isn’t going to be the first to do it. (ALASTOR I SWEAR TO GOD!)
Who knows how many other people he’s abusing.
Seems to give Vicks confidence. He has enough of that as is. It much more fun to destroy him.
He makes Angel sad which makes Cherri sad!
HE HIT ANGEL!!!
Called my dear Rosie an "old hag" NOBODY CALLS ROSIE AN OLD HAG.
Angel is a good friend and deserves so much better.
I’ve forgotten what moths taste like.
He keeps trying to get Angel to move out :(
Told the kid he had to lose weight. What the actual FUCK. (Ill kill him.)
He’s annoying and looks quite stupid. How has this not been added yet?!
He’s making a bad name for Spanish speakers everywhere. (Yeah it’s embarrassing.) (Wait… what?)
He’s making a bad name for pansexuals everywhere.
He’s making a bad name for wing-holders everywhere. (HE HAS FUCKING WINGS?!) (Oh, yeah, I didn’t tell you?)
Too tall. This is ridiculous.
Won’t admit he’s blind so he’s become even more of a public safety hazard.
If I get one more transmission of him and Box commiting lascivious acts someone will be eaten. I don’t care who. What the purpose of these are I don’t know. Advertisement? (I think it’s to make you jealous boss.) (Ha! Jealous of what? Mediocre sex with a pathetic excuse for a businessman with a TV as a head?)
Because Angel deserves fucking better.
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Hello I’m here to talk about an opinion that isn’t so much unpopular because people don’t like it, but because it is splitting hairs and basically an argument based in semantics that sane people reasonably do not waste their time caring about it.
I am neither sane nor reasonable and therefore think about this a lot, and get ready to pull out a soapbox and type the Text Wall of China any time I hear people offhandedly contradict this opinion, and so I have come here today to die on this molehill, and write the over-long post of my dreams, because fuck it, it’s my blog.
Drumroll please:
Sauron is not The Lord of the Rings
The Lord of the Rings is the main antagonist though, so furthermore,
Sauron is not the main antagonist of The Lord of the Rings
I internally go insane every time someone says “Sauron, the eponymous Lord of the Rings” or “The antagonist never actually appears in Lord of the Rings” or uses Lord of the Rings as an penultimate example of having a flat ‘evil for evil’s sake’ villain. This is mostly in YouTube videos so I’m not calling out anyone here.
So who is the Lord of the Rings? Where do I get this shit? Why should anyone care?
I will tell you in far too much detail under this cut, because I told you I was gonna be extra about it and this is already long enough to inflict on my followers without their consent.
First and foremost, Frodo is not the Lord of the Rings either. Let’s get that out of the way. Gandalf explicitly tells us that in Many Meetings (the first chapter in Rivendell in Fellowship), when Pippin greets a newly awakened Frodo with quintessential Fool of a Took™️ swagger.
‘Hurray!’ cried Pippin, springing up. ‘Here is our noble cousin! Make way for Frodo, Lord of the Ring!’
‘Hush!’ Said Gandalf from the shadows at the back of the porch. ‘Evil things do not come into this valley; but all the same we should not name them. The Lord of the Ring is not Frodo, but the master of the Dark Tower of Mordor, whose power is again stretching out over the world! We are sitting in a fortress. Outside it is getting dark.’
So that’s my theory busted right off the bat! Gandalf straight up tells us the Lord of the Ring is Sauron (‘the master of the Dark Tower of Mordor’ which is Sauron).
But I already told you, this is a hair-splitting semantics-based theory! He said Sauron was the Lord of the Ring. Not the Lord of the RingS. Yes, this whole theory revolves around a single letter difference between the title of the series and Gandalf’s statement, WHAT OF IT?
But in all seriousness. Tolkien was a linguist. There was no way this choice was not deliberate, not on something so important to the narrative. And there is a very important difference between what he is referring to when he uses ‘The Ring” singular, and “The Rings” plural. The Ring that Frodo carried to Mordor has it’s singular nature highly emphasized by the language that surrounds it. THE definite article Ring, the ONE Ring. Just the One. Singular Singular Singular.
The Rings (plural) refers to the rings of power which Celebrimbor wrought, with Sauron’s help, but Sauron is objectively not the Lord of those rings. Not the three Elven ones at least, which he never touched and only suspects the location of. Without his One Ring he has no power over the Three, and a big problem with him regaining his Ring is that he would gain power over those rings, the ringbearers, and the safe realms that had been wrought with them, basically crippling those with the power to resist him.
Him NOT having the Ring, and therefore NOT having lordship over all the rings, is a pretty major plot point. Like, it’s not a reach to say Sauron not having the Ring is what drives the entire story. And he is NOT the Lord of the Rings without it.
And he never gains it, so is the whole series named after Sauron’s aspirations, that the main characters are trying to prevent? I mean, from an angle yes. But also no.
Because while Pippin and Gandalf’s exchange is the closest we come in the text to seeing the title, let me show you the only place within the covers that “The Lord of the Rings” is presented, at least in my beat up third hand 70’s edition. It may not be formatted like this in other editions, but I still think it says something about how we are supposed to read the title:
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[Image ID: Masking tape can clearly be seen holding together my poor abused copy of Fellowship, open to the title page. THE LORD OF THE RINGS is written across the top of the page in all caps, directly below it is the Ring Poem, as if The Lord of the Rings is a the title not only of the series but of the poem. /.End ID]
The One Ring is the Lord of the Rings, not Sauron, who is the Lord of the Ring.
“What?” Say imaginary naysayers in my head, “How can a Ring be a Lord? And why does this matter, if Sauron is the Lord of the Ring, doesn’t that make him the Lord of the Rings by proxy? Why are you wasting your and my time making an argument about this?”
I’m glad you asked imaginary naysayer, let me speak to your first point. How can a ring be a Lord? Well, like any good first time speechwriter, I’ve turned to Miriam Webster, and asked it to define a word we already know, in this case ‘lord.’
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[Image ID: Screenshot of the Miriam Webster definition of ‘lord.’ The ones that are relevant are 1: One having power and authority over others. 1a: A ruler by hereditary right or preeminence to whom service and obedience are due. And 1f: One that has achieved mastery or that exercises leadership or great power in some area /.End ID]
In the poem, it is the Ring that is spoken of as ruling, not Sauron. Sauron is actually listed in the same position as all the others who receive rings, “The Dark Lord on his Dark Throne” occupying the same place in the sentence structure as the “the Elven-kings under the sky” and “the Dwarf-lords in their halls of stone” and “Mortal Men doomed to die.” It is the One Ring, not Sauron, who rules them all, fulfilling our first definition “A ruler by hereditary right or preeminence.” In this case it would be by right of preeminence, or superiority. The One Ring outclasses the other rings and thus dominates them, binding them to obedience and service. Gandalf calls it “the Master-Ring” when it is first revealed for what it is in Bag-End with the words appearing from the flame.
The Ring has it’s own will too. It’s repeatedly stated to be in control of Gollum when Gandalf is first telling us about it. I’m literally so spoiled for quotes about this that I was paralyzed with indecisiveness over what to use but let’s keep it simple with this one. It’s from Gandalf explaining why Gollum didn’t have the Ring allowing Bilbo to come upon it in the chapter “Shadows of the Past” from Fellowship:
‘It was not Gollum, Frodo, but the Ring itself that decided things. The Ring left him.’
So if Sauron is the Lord of the Ring, and the Ring is the Lord of the Rings, isn’t he Lord of the Rings by proxy? Yes, when he has the Ring. But also being the ruler of a lord doesn’t make the title of that lord your title, if that makes sense. People don’t call Aragorn the Prince of Ithilien, that’s Faramir’s title, Aragorn is King of the Reunited Kingdoms, he rules Ithilien, sure, but by proxy. Ithilien reports to Faramir who reports to Aragorn (I should be calling him Elessar since I’m talking about him as king, but whatever). If Aragorn lost the ability to contact Faramir or Ithilian, he would still theoretically be king there but he would have no practical control, just like Sauron with the Rings of Power.
Why does this matter? It mostly doesn’t. It does not change anything practically in the story at all.
But it matters to me, because it might help change perspective on the antagonist of LotR. It’s the Ring. Sauron is a force in the world, one the Ring is closely allied with, and from whom many of the obstacles come, but the entity that our protagonist is really fighting on every page is the Ring.
If Gandalf were the main character, or Aragorn, or almost anyone else on Middle Earth, Sauron would be the Primary Antagonist. But they are not. Frodo is the Primary Protagonist, and his struggle is NOT against Sauron, it is against the Ring.
If destroying the Ring had not destroyed Sauron, would Frodo have kept fighting in this war? NO! He had his task, and once it was done he was done, even if the world ended afterwards. Everything is driven by the Ring. The threat to the Shire comes from the presence of the Ring, so Frodo takes the Ring to Rivendell. The danger of the Ring is not neutralized by it being brought to Rivendell, so he continues his journey to destroy it once and for all. He doesn’t fight Sauron, he fights the Ring. He fights with himself to keep going in spite of the despair it levels on him, the poisonous words it whispers in his ear, the physical toll it takes on his body. He fights Boromir and Sam (not to the extent he does in the movie, but still a bit) and Gollum over the Ring. He negotiates with Faramir over the Ring.
And the Ring is SUCH a more interesting and nuanced villain to struggle with than Sauron. Sauron is representative of a force in the world. He controls events but never appears, because he acts as the source of all evil, it’s representation on earth (at least now Melkor is in the Void), but it is far more interesting to watch the effect he has on others than deal directly with a character that is so obviously in the wrong in every way. Making Sauron a physical character in LotR is like making the Devil a present character in basically any piece of media that deals with evil.
Evil at its purest isn’t that interesting, because it contains no conflict. Leaving Sauron as an offscreen player leaves us to see characters that are not pure evil struggle with that conflict.
The fascinating thing about the Ring is that it has no power outside of what you give it. But given enough time even the best people, like Frodo, will end up losing themselves to it, as it whispers in your ear with your own voice.
I want to go ballistic when people point to LotR and say it has a one dimensional villain. EVERYONE’S OWN VIOLENCE, DESPAIR AND THIRST FOR POWER IS THE VILLAIN OF LORD OF THE RINGS! Brought to the fore by a small unassuming golden trinket which just happens to also be the titular Lord of the Rings.
Honestly “The Ring is the Villain of LotR change my mind” should be its own big long post with lots of quotes and shit, the fact that the Ring is The Lord of the Rings just being a small point in it.
But unless you are a specific type of interested in story structure and stuff none of this is at all meaningful and it really, really doesn’t matter, so I’m gonna go.
Thanks for coming with me on this dumb journey.
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Why I haven't said anything about Israel and Palestine
Because "I don't know enough to have an opinion" is a complete sentence
Because Hamas is a terrorist hate group but the citizens of Gaza are innocent
Because Hamas hides behind human shields and the Israelis should be strategic but Hamas wants to wipe us from the earth but the children of Gaza did nothing wrong but so did the children of Israel but Gaza shared a border with Egypt to and why oh why aren't we asking anyone else to help them to care for them why must it fall to Israel
Because they have always tried to wipe us from the earth, because we have always been in Israel, because sure if you go back to 1948 there were Arabs living there but there were Jews too and if you go back a little further they tried to eradicate us and it was the British who gave us that land anyway and we tried to live in peace and they attacked us first and we had help all along and maybe the problem is that a Jew is only sympathetic when he's dead not when he fights back
Because the Israeli government is flirting with fascism and we love you Israel but even my conservative synagogue criticized her on the Yom Kippur appeal this year, because we love you Israel but we never meant for you to be like this
Because every Jew has at some point thought about everyone they know "would they hide me or would they give me to the Nazis"
Because American Muslims are suffering and they have always been othered but also why is it so hard to condemn terrorism when it's about the Jews, why do you have to twist yourself into a sadistic pretzel to suggest that yes sure loss of life is bad but maybe they deserved it, because at a fundamental level so many so-called liberals fundamentally see Jews as "other" and will do whatever they can to avoid empathizing with us
Because Israel has been oppressing Gaza for years and we should be better and we should be able to expect more of Israel and why oh why hasn't anyone else stepped in to help them why is it just on us
Because the hard right ultra Orthodox terrify me and that is not the Judaism I recognize and it is a perversion of my faith and my people and if they are Israel we've already lost
Because the Jews haven't had a homeland for 2000 years and we finally have one we finally have someplace we're safe and the whole world feels qualified to weigh in on whether we actually deserve it, whether we're worthy, whether we've been the image of perfection they need us to be to have earned a place where finally no one can kick us out
Because I learned about the specific horrors of the Holocaust when I was 7 years old, because I can never lose the image of a mother being forced to chose which of her children will die or a rabbi being wrapped in a Torah and burned to death because they have always killed us just because we're Jewish and will continue to do so when given the chance
Because there's children dying who did nothing wrong
Because if a message is short and simple enough to be wrapped up in a pithy Instagram post it can't be true, because if it were simple enough to be expressed in a pithy Instagram post don't you think it would have been solved in something less than a 60 year quagmire
Because this doesn't fit into the dichotomies you're comfortable with of white people/POC and colonizers/colonized and oppressors/oppressed and when you try to express it in those terms you've already missed the point
Because I will always support the Jewish people and the uncomfortable truth of that is sometimes that also means supporting Israel
Because how can Israel claim the moral high ground when it commits atrocities
Because I have family in Israel and bomb threats at synagogues and JCCs at home and I'm scared
Because I am a member of the American liberal intelligencia so I am pretty safe all things considered but so were European Jews before the Holocaust and it's been drilled into me since birth that we're never really safe
And that's why we need Israel
Because I'm not smart enough or well informed enough to begin to have a hope of doing justice to this problem and lots of people much smarter and better informed than me have tried and clearly failed since here we are
So fuck your Instagram post, fuck your tweet, fuck your sanctimonious tumblr call-out. This is a tragedy, the internet the last place I would look to do anything about it, and the only thing anyone, including me, can do to help on the internet is shut the fuck up.
https://afmda.org/
https://donate.jdc.org/give/109212/#!/donation/checkout?c_src=jdcobtn&c_src2=Crisis%20in%20Israel:%20JDC%20Responds30240
https://www.allmep.org/donate-now/
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dragonlands · 5 months
Text
There's so much negativity around Izzy's death so I wanted to address some of the points I keep seeing thrown around.
"Izzy's death was pointless"
No, he just had his big speech about how basically they can kill him but they cannot kill the movement. That is a clear paraller to a lot of real life protestors of unjustice. He died protecting the community, he died so the community could go on.
"Izzy's death made his healing pointless"
No it didn't. Healing is always good, feeling happiness and belonging are ALWAYS worth it. We never know how long we've got, doesn't mean we gotta stop trying to be better or happier. His healing was still real. It still mattered.
"Izzy's character arc was left unfinished, it's bad writing"
Oh my god. If you open any writing guide about how to write impactful deaths, and the first thing that comes up is to leave some part of their arc unfinished. And his arc did go through quite a beautiful line, sure there could've been more but his story didn't end like, mid arc. As a writer, of course you want to make the audience sad when a character dies. It's good storytelling. Good stories are supposed to make us feel.
"Izzy died on the arms of his abuser"
Where the hell did this idea come from? Ed and Izzy have been in a toxic codependent relationship way before this show started. You could argue that Izzy was Ed's abuser, but that is not the argument I want to make here. Yes, we saw Ed driven to madness shoot Izzy on screen, but we know Izzy's the one that forced him to be Blackbeart when he didn't want it anymore. There's turmoil all around them. But the final moment is them finally meeting as people, not as components of Blackbeard.
"Izzy's death was unnecessarily awful"
His death was sad, yes, but it was quite beautiful as far as deaths go. He was surrounded by family who cared for him. He was loved, and accepted as he is. He knew his legacy will be carried on.
"They killed off the only character that showed us healing is never too late"
Did we watch the same show? That begins with then unhappy 40+ year old Stede deciding it's finally time to reach for his dreams? Where we see Blackbeard slowly gaining back his humanity? Where Black Pete starts off as toxically masculine dude but ends up in a soft gay marriage? Where most of the crew wanted to mutiny but then they realized being soft is good, actually. Jim's whole purpose in life being revenge but them learning to let that go and instead concentrate on love and fun and family. And so on. Izzy's arc is beautiful, but he's not the only person healing who thought it was too late already.
"Izzy's death was bury your gays trope"
No, what, no. In a pirate show where everyobody is queer some queer people will die. Bury your gays is about only having one or few queer characters and killing them off while the straights get their happily ever afters. This is so far from that.
Also, I want people to be aware of the phenomenon, where creators of diverse shows are subjected to more critism than those of non diverse shows. If this intrests you, Sarah Z on Youtube made a great video on it called Double standards and diverse media. Our flag means death has given us so much, queer love story with a happily ever after, finding community, nonbinary character. And the creators have always been so kind to fans, so let's show them tht kindness back. Because critizicing this one aspect can easily turn to seeming like the whole story is just unwanted. That stories like Ed and Stede's aren't worth telling. And I'm so aftraid that will happen, when just now for the first time in years we are finally getting queer stories.
Also, I understand people are sad. I am sad too - Izzy was an amazing character and his death was sad but that's just. Good writing. You can grieve, but trying to turn it into a moral or dramaturgy issue is just not a good look. And attacking the creators of this wonderful show is just horrible.
Remember - this fandom is a safe space ship 🏴‍☠️🏳️‍🌈
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beiasluv · 1 year
Note
ok so i sent a request but im not sure if you got it bc it glitched for me
anywy its like the fic you did wherin reader and neteyam are twins and stuff and reader likes aonung and aonung likes her and stuff, and the main thing of the fic is that jake and neteyam (mostly jake) are protective of her like the "no boys until i die!" shi yk
anyway love your work xx
protective sullys
a/n: PLEASE, GUYS WE NEED JAKE’S DAD GIRL ERA PERIODT / i feel something’s not right in this fic, but i hope you guys still enjoy it 🤍
masterlist
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the day your family arrived at the metkayina clan was one of the most beautiful and hideous days in the history
you guys were met with judging eyes and snickers from the people, while some gave reassuring smiles. you don’t know who to trust or where to go, but you hoped for the best and put on a fake smile to calm your siblings down.
but, neteyam being neteyam, he knows you too well. he sensed a feeling of uneasiness in your gut and he can feel it too. i mean, what do they say about twins?
while tuk held on to neytiri and jake, neteyam wrapped his arm around your shoulder, rubbing gently along your marks, and whispering comforting words.
“it’s goin’ to be alright, y/n…, i know we can do it, sully sticks together, huh?” he was met with your snicker to his joke.
but…one particular eye caught your attention. the bluest and tender teal eyes amongst the crowd stared into your soul. you felt your legs trembling under his gaze, yet you stood tall. neteyam noticing him as well made an unwelcoming face toward the intruder’s view
“well, our daughter, tsireya, and son, ao’nung, will show you the way of our lives. treat them with respect and be kind to them, for they are like babies taking their first step,”
‘so…‘ao’nung’…huh?’
settling down in your marui wasn’t as easy as it was back home. the floors are bouncy, which tuk liked A LOT, and there is little to no privacy at all. you miss the pandora plants and leaves that provided shade and coverage.
anyways, life was starting to look better.
until someone had to ruin it again…that familiar eyes you know so well, yet to little. he was staring at you again.
the very first practice session your siblings and you received much unnecessary embarrassment from the metkayina’s teens
well, it would be fair to say that you received them the least. ao’nung is always coughing or changing the subject
“well, you know, freak, if you don’t have those five little fingers then-“
“ahem, where were we? oh, right, let’s go to the reefs over there, numnuts,” ao’nung pointed towards the sea with his real fingers. “last person’s a raw egg.”
without another word, he swam off into the sea. and unknowingly to you, a grownup teenager, you still fell for the stupid game every time. seeing your siblings beating you to dive into the ocean, you followed in quickly.
but it seemed like your attempts had been in vain. bubbles leaving your mouth, covering your views of the world around you. like heaven sent, his -yes you knew this color- teal marked hand clutched your body from drowning into the ocean floor, dragging you up to the surface.
“are you alright? i am sorry, so sorry,” he clutched your face in his arm. “are you hurt?” he grabbed hurriedly along your body checking for injuries.
“i- i am fine, no worries, thank you,” you smiled sheepishly.
“now, hold my shoulders, okay?” he guided you behind his back. “breath in…we’re going down,” you breathed your last air and your body was submerged underneath again.
while at the coral reef, he took an extra effort to stay close to you. neteyam caught on what was going on and he wasn’t happy about you being close to that teal freak. lo’ak definitely gave a side eye on ao’nung.
that simple act of kindness melted your heart by a little, even if you didn’t want to accept it.
to say that when jake heard the news of your possible death, he wasn’t the most friendly towards ao’nung. tonowari wasn’t the most glad either. (dads being homies vibe)
plus, the fight they had on the beach didn’t help the situation get any better.
“please! guys! stop!” you shouted as you ran up from the ocean, finding yourself with the sight of a tumbling ball of blue na’vis
your sight caught the eyes of one particular metkayina and a gulp in his throat. looking at your fresh of the water and hair sticking to your body he managed to croaked out, “hey…y- y/n.”
“neteyam! lo’ak! c’mon!” you insisted. without a second thought, you dragged them by their ears and kicked off a metkayina attacking their tails. “please, show us some respect and we’ll reciprocate them, sorry for them.”
you flicked your head back and turned away from them, making your way towards your marui. that sight caught one metkayina to get lost in his mind and a drool slipped down his lips. ‘man, he messed up real bad.’
but in the mist of the mess, the heart of the storm, was just a lover boy trying his best to retrieve his chance
jake and neteyam turned on their ultimate protective mode 110%
“never bother my sister, ever AGAIN. you hear that?” neteyam hissed against ao’nung’s face, adding extra effort to spat a saliva against his teal face.
jake would be so protective of you 😭
he would always remind you every morning like: “no boys until i die, understand?”
hugs you all the timeeee. when walking around the village, wrapping a hand around your shoulder is a must for him.
protecting you from the eyes of the boys is his first priority. (cuz, obviously, he knows what those boys thinks, because he was once like in their place 💀)
jake would always tell you to cover up 😭 (as if na’vi clothes provide any coverage-) but anyways, he’ll say like “wear a shawl over your shoulder, it’s hot outside.”
always asking where are you going and when are you gonna come back.
lying to jake about those stuff are useless, so you did what a good child would do: telling him that you are going to hang out with ao’nung
i am telling you that jake lost his MIND, “WHAT, Y/N, HONEY, NO, WITH HIM? WHY?”
but anyways, our consent king respected his baby’s decision and let you go, BUT was panicking so much.
“okay, honey, what did i tell you?”
“yes, dad, no kissing, no hugging, no mating, come back before sunset, and use the talkie-walkie if he does something weird,” you rolled your eyes. for sure you are not going to mate with some dude on a first date.
“you missed one…”
“no touching, right, dad, what do you expect us to do if we are not allowed to have physical contact, meditate?”
“right, then, meditation sounds nice, doesn’t it?”
“dad!”
neteyam would kill for you without a hesitation. scaring some creepy dudes? easy
he gives out the best bear hug for youuuu
loves to comfort his siblings, especially you
jake is not much of a difference. he is super protective of his kids and you especially. his prized possession and the apple of his eyes.
being his oldest daughter, requires lots of sacrifice but jake’s affection for you is all worth it.
anyways, GOOD LUCK ao’nung, you need that. passing through the death valley with two demons behind your trail is not easy 💀
every time he comes to pick you up, he is sweating like a DAWG
“hello, mr.sully, is erm…y/n here?”
“well, where do you expect her to be? did you made a proper plan? son…, my daughter is not an object you could just pick up whenever you are bored.”
“yes, sir, we agreed to go-“
“ao’nung!” you called as you walked out. “bye, dad, love ya,” a peck on the cheek for jake and you’re off the marui.
“bye, sweetheart,” a smile for you and a death glare for ao’nung, pretty basic.
neytiri to the rescue, guyssss. she definitely have a soft spot for boys, and boys like *ahem* jake ao’nung.
she sees his effort for you and tries to persuade jake into giving in. and jake will be like: “pLEASE, no.”
but changing someone as egotistical as ao’nung to become more humble isn’t the easiest job. every moment, hanging out together, it was as if you rubbed his ego down step by step.
ronal and tonowari were GLAD. “please, y/n, tell us how you do it” 💀
ao’nung became the sweetest boy for you 🥺 *neteyam staring behind*😈
today’s a great day to treat yourself! 🤍
@rosaryos / @bumblinbumblvee / @nyotamalfoy / @fangirl-2610 / @astablacksword / @lokisblueskin
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actiniumwrites · 7 months
Text
𝐎𝐔𝐓 𝐎𝐅 𝐓𝐎𝐔𝐂𝐇
synopsis: in which you find out the truth about lyney’s identity
characters: lyney x gn!reader
wc: 695
warnings: pure angst, established relationships, breakups, reader has a past with the fatui, mentions of physical harm and death, major spoilers for the 4.0 archon quest
notes: i am officially in writers block and want to die because of it. also, i know this idea is a little old since the quest came out a few weeks ago, but i still wanted to write something about his identity. also, yes, i would forgive lyney, but this blog has not seen pure angst in awhile so…🙂
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“You were never going to tell me, were you?” Your voice is barely above a whisper as you finally break the silence. Your arms are crossed as you lean back against one of the brick walls of the Opera Epiclese. Lyney stands approximately three feet away from you.
He’s silent, unable to answer the burning question. It’s been on your mind all night ever since Furina had so proudly announced it to all of the court. Lyney was a part of the House of the Hearth. Part of the Fatui.
“I can’t lie to you,” he carefully picks his words, terrified of further upsetting you.
Cutting him off, you scoff and turn away from him further than you already had, “What? Like you haven’t been lying to me this entire time? Real funny.”
Lyney takes a single step closer to you.
You take one back.
“Please, I wasn’t lying to you. I just left out some parts of the truth, that’s all, I swear!”
“You are part of the Fatui, Lyney. The Fatui! How can I trust you when you’re part of an organization who hurts people, kills people, even,” you frown. Not a single part of you isn’t affected by the hurt you feel. He hears the way your voice is beginning to break too, like the truth of it all is finally beginning to set in.
His hands come together as he pleads, “I promise I’ve never hurt anyone, not ever! Not everyone and everything in the Fatui is evil.”
For the first time tonight, you turn toward him and look him in the eyes. Your arms become uncrossed as you feel anger fuel your every action, every thought, every feeling. Walking toward him step by step, you hold out a finger, digging it into his chest as you speak, “You don’t get to pick and choose when you’re a part of something dangerous, Lyney! I don’t care if you aren’t the one doing the killing or the hurting, you still help them. What about all those people I told you about? My friends and family who got hurt by the Fatui? Did that mean nothing to you?”
He watches as tears form in your eyes at the mention of them. Of course he remembered, how could he not? The day you confided in him about your past and all the misfortune that you were dealt by the Fatui was eternally engraved in his mind. The organization who had taken so much from you that you swore you would find a way to end it one day, even if it meant dying. You had laid everything out to him and the entire time he was on their side.
You take two more steps back from him, voice shaking as cave in on yourself, “No wonder you were so quiet that day. God, and here I was thinking you actually cared.”
“Please don’t say that,” he whispers, tempted to reach a hand out to you, but not willing to scare you off. For all he knows, this could be the last time he ever sees you, “I care about you so much it hurts me. I really was horrified by the things you told me, I promise you that. Understand that I’ve only ever been talking to you as just Lyney. Your Lyney.”
It takes everything in you not to run into his arms and forget all of this is even happening. Give into his pleading words and return to who you thought was the only person who had ever really loved you. You want to pinch your arm to wake yourself up from the cruel nightmare, but somewhere deep inside, part of you has already accepted the truth and the fact that there is no universe in which you could accept his true identity. And so you take one final look at him before you take your final step, allowing the tears to fall from your eyes as you bid him a permanent farewell.
Lyney would never forget the final words you spoke to him. Four words that managed to break both your hearts more than the truth had.
“You’re not my Lyney.”
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margotwhites · 1 month
Text
Jason Todd x Singer reader (fem)
Author's note: I received such a surprisingly positive reply from this! I haven't posted in months, so this caught me off guard completely. (Yes 15 notes is good for me lmao 🥹) In this version, Jason knows who reader are since the beginning. I thought it'd be more fun.
So, basically this a longer version of the first part + a second part. I intend to write this in chapters. Enjoy and please give me your thoughts ❤️
Part two:
----------------------------------------------------------------
Jason Todd knew one thing or two about twitter. Or X, whatever. The thing is: he's at least three times a month in the trending topics. Not him exactly, but Red Hood. Red Hood is always there.
It goes from people hating on him, to young girls (psycho's in his opinion) calling him babygirl or daddy. He doesn't understands and he doesn't want to. He's not much one from social media, so when he is on the trending topics, normally someone from the family teases him about it.
This time is no different. Dick Grayson and Tim Drake are laughing way too hard. Looking from Tim's phone directly towards Jason. He sighs, closing the book he is reading. Currently they are all comfortably sitting on the library, eating Alfred's cookies and tea.
"What is it?" Jason asks, already regretting the question.
"Open twitter." Tim says, a huge smile on his face. Jason feels a chill down his spine because he knows it's going to be bad. Not that he cares. He doesn't give a shit about public's opinion.
But sometimes the comments about him, the mean comments wishing him to die... Those get to him. So he's prepared for that. For people hating, or for his fangirls fighting deciding who'd be his next imaginary girlfriend.
But he never expected to be shipped with someone else. He knows who you are. Everybody knows who you are. A talented young singer, that ascended till the top in less than three years. Doing some works on modeling from time to time for McQueen or Vogue or Versace, because you're that beautiful.
He wouldn't call himself a fan, but he does think you are musically talented. Anyway, everyone is shipping him with you.
And he doesn't know why.
"Why am I being shipped with her?" He asks, out loud. Before Dick or Tim can answer, Steph bursts into the library's door laughing.
"Jason-"
"I know."
She laughs again. He starts to scroll down the comments, until he finds a video of a live interview you did on Kurt's show, that prick. The journalist is famous for doing weird questions.
"So, everybody knows you have a bit of thing for vigilantism. How did that start?" Kurt asks, crossing his arms and giving the public a charming smile.
"Oh, it started with Batman, of course. I was a little kid when I heard the stories about the man that haunted the nights in Gotham. I am a L.A girl, but either way I absolutely felt enchanted. It's just so cool that is there someone out there that takes justice in their own hands."
Yeah, right. She's a fan of the Batass. Jason scoffs while watching the video, but continues anyway.
"And who is your favorite vigilante?" Kurt asked, leaning closer to her. He was a charming man, young and successful, just like her.
"Oh, Red Hood, definitely." She says that without a hint of sarcasm in her voice. Just a plain, simple answer.
"Red Hood? Isn't he a bit... extreme?" Kurt said, tilting his head.
"I think he is doing good in his own ways, and that is so freaking cool, you know? And I think his motorcycle is super... uh, how can I say? Hot." She says, and gives the public a little giggle. She continues:
"Which doesn't mean I agree with everything he does. But I find his persona interesting and refreshing. He's different from the rest, different approaches and all. It makes me curious about who is the man behind the mask."
"If you could say anything to him, what would you say?" Kurt asks, smiling.
"Oh! I'd probably ask him to take me on a ride with his bike. And to get a girlfriend. I think he needs a feminine touch in his life." She answers, with an amused grin.
The video ends and Jason doesn't really know what to think. You just said he needed a girlfriend. A feminine touch.
The truth is, he can't really disagree. When was the last time he felt a woman's body close to his? More time than he wants to admit. Months. Maybe more than a year. In his defense, it's not that he doesn't have the game. He just don't have the energy to play it.
Steph laughs takes him out of his wandering thoughts. He looks up at his siblings, an irritated expression in his face.
"Read the tweets, the tweets are the best part!" She says, chuckling again. Jason goes straight to the shipping hashtag. People saying they want to be Jason, people saying they want to be you, people saying they want to be the bed where you both - forget it.
He sighs and throws his cellphone on the couch, sitting back and beginning to read his book.
"That's it? That's your reaction?" Dick asks, tilting his head like a curious dog.
"It's just a bunch of tweets. People will forget eventually. Nothing I should worry about." Jason replies, not taking his eyes off The Catcher in the Rye.
Little did he know.
__________________________________________________
Okay. Maybe you shouldn't have said that. Maybe you were dumb and reckless. And now your agent and her team are almost killing you.
It's not your fault. You were always told to be honest, because your fun and outgoing (at least on stage) personality were one of your best traits.
"Are you crazy! This could have led to terrible repercussions. What if everyone focused on the fact that you support a murderer?!" Claya, your agent says, almost shouting.
"Well, they didn't. Now they are just shipping him with me." You say, trying to defend yourself. The truth is, behind the cameras and the stage and all the "popstar" persona you have to pull out, you are an introvert. You have two lifes.
"Yeah, and you should be grateful for it. This can even be a good sign. It seems people are interested in your love life. We can use that for our advantage." Claya says.
You adore her, really. And it's her job to figure it out how to make your career ascend. And she does it very well. But sometimes you just wish it wouldn't be about money or status. It would be just about how to do good music.
Anyway, you don't want to be ungrateful. You're living your childhood dream. So you take those thoughts out of your mind.
"Well, what do you have in mind?" You ask, blinking in confusion.
"We're going to Gotham. You're going to do a show there." Claya says, confidently and typing on her computer.
"Are you out of your mind? Shows in Gotham always go wrong. The Chase Atlantic show from last month was attacked by Pyg!" You say, trying to contain your agent's wicked ideas.
"Honey, don't worry. Maybe Red Hood appears in to save the whole ordeal. It couldn't be better." Claya says, standing up and closing her computer.
Claya and the team leave you alone to think. It's not like you have a lot of choice in the matter, anyway. If she says you're doing the show, you gotta do it.
But it's just a show, right? Nothing to worry about.
Little did you know.
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sehodreams · 23 days
Note
who in riize would you think that will be in a phone call with the reader in the middle of the night just to listen her voice talking about nothing? (maybe i have something about this and this question comes through my mind). And i really, really love "sex, money, feelings, die", it's sooooo good. Sorry english is not my first language.
I'm so happy you like sex money feelings die, I thought people would get tired of their silly conversations on the phone this last chapter but I'm glad it wasn't that bad hahahaha
Don't worry babe, english is not my first language either, we're here doing our best to learn!
This is more a how would calls with them be, I imagined them all and it was so cute 😭👌
Tw and tags: pure fluff, a little suggestive with Shotaro.
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Eunseok definitely would be the kind of guy who sends you a text at 2 am to ask if you're awake, and the minute he sees you've read his message he'd call you, ''Why are you calling me at this hour?'' you'd ask, and he'd reply with a ''Why are you awake if you don't want me to call you?'', to make you laugh and then ask you about random stuff just to hear you until you or him fall asleep.
Anton is needier, he likes his daily night call, so every day at the same time you'd receive a text from him asking if he can call you, and when you say yes, he'd immediately do it, but I see him, more than talking, asking you questions to hear you ramble, and if you ask him the same question back, he'd softly laugh a bit embarrassed, ''sorry, got lost in your voice for a second, what were we talking about?''
Sungchan seems like the kind of guy who also loves his daily call, but he also seems like he would rather talk while you listen, and even if he says nothing and you either, he wants you to stay on the phone with him just to feel your company.
Sohee wouldn't call you, you'd call him, and he loves that. I see him more as the type who prefers texting, but he would never say no to you asking if you can call him, patiently listening to you and giving you answers when you need them. However, what I also see, is he falling asleep with your voice, and after a few times like that he'd be stuck to his phone waiting for your name to appear on his screen every night.
Seunghan would call you and plan little activities to not fall in silence, you can't tell me he doesn't make his girlfriend download silly games to play while you two talk for HOURS.
Wonbin doesn't seem like the kind who rambles much on the phone, but he still likes long phone calls, just listening to you breathe or even singing, leaving little comments every now and then and only hanging up when you beg him to let you go (at the end he'd take screenshots of how many hours you've been on the call to show it off to the other boys).
Shotaro likes to hear your voice but I think he prefers even more to see you, so he'd ask for short video calls if you're not busy, and a long one once a week, asking you to model for him if you bought something new or just to see you better (you can't tell me this man won't love those calls to have a... happy ending).
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alpaca-clouds · 2 months
Text
How redeeming Gortash would improve Karlach's story
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I will admit, that the title is a bit overstated, because by the time you actually get to interact with Gortash, the plot just does not have enough time left to redeem him. Because other than what some folks in Hollywood think: No, giving a character one last minute "heel-face-turn" with one big symbolic act does not in fact redeem a character. Redemption is a process that takes time.
BG3 actually understands this, because Astarion's arc basically ends with: "You took the first steps towards redemption." Which is really good.
However: You could end the game at least in a way to set Gortash up for a possible redemption arc - and more importantly just... not have him die. Because actually that would improve Karlach's character arc.
I will get one thing out of the way first: The entire "Gortash redemption" idea is always contentious on the fact that he is a really bad guy. Like, he is bad. He brutally killed and tortured, he enslaved people, all of that.
I am an anarchist though. Hence, I do not really believe that punishment is in any way just. And to put it differently: Killing Gortash does not undo any of the harm he has caused. Not a single dead person will live through it, not a single tortured person will become untortured through it, and no slave is freed through it either (you kinda gotta say that as the player in a different mission).
And yes, I will say at this point that in general I was iffed by the fact that in many fights of the game I was not given a choice really. It was "either join the bad guys or kill them", and my "all charisma bard", who does not believe in killing for revenge, was like: "But... But..."
Like, my Tav was on board with killing Cazador (because literally in the situation it is "kill Cazador or have 7000 people die") and killing Ketheric (because he needed to die to end the curse), but he is already iffy on Orin (as she never had a choice but to be a killer) and definitely is not on board with killing Gortash (because there is no good reason to do it).
But let me talk about Karlach. Because the thing is... I have seen a lot of commentary on how Wyll is underwritten. And he is. But not as underwritten as Karlach. Like, her entire companion quest basically goes: "Kill some fake paladins, find Dammon, find two pieces of Infernal Iron, kill Gortash (which you have to do for plot reasons either way)". She doesn't really have a dungeon connected to her quest. Nor really an exclusive boss fight, because again: Gortash you kinda gotta fight for the story either way. Nothing really.
Every other character, too, also has to make one hard decision. Where they want one thing - but what is actually the good thing is something else. I wrote about this before, the "become what you hate" decision, basically.
Karlach doesn't. Sure, you could argue that the "die or go back to Avernus" decision is her big decision. But it feels very different than the decisions of the others.
Which brings me to Gortash and saving him.
Here is the thing: Logically speaking Gortash should probably be able to fix Karlach's engine. He understands infernal engines, as he built the Steel Watch around them. You can easily argue that yeah, he should be able to fix Karlach. And that... would actually make for a great decision for Karlach's story.
If I would get to fix Karlach's companion quest, I would probably do it like this: Put in some sort of dungeon where Dammon sends you in the hope that you can find some plans there, that might give him an understanding on how to fix the engine. Heck, if you do not wanna do a whole new dungeon, you could also just put some plans or whatever into the Steel Foundry.
The point is that it will then turn out that, yeah, even with those plans for some reason Gortash is the only one who could fix it. Putting Karlach into the spot to make this decision: Does she value her life more than her revenge on Gortash?
Because here is the thing: Gortash is supposed to be 1) the intelligent one of the dead three chosen, and 2) also clearly is the one who acts first and foremost in some sense for his own self-preservation. Which made me go like: "Nah, this does not make sense," when he decides to fight against me after his Steel Watch was disabled and I already killed the other two chosen.
So, yeah... You should get at least a chance to persuade him to just give up - or, going back to what I was talking about before - to save Karlach.
And again, I actually think that even for the Gortash part of the story it would make for more interesting storytelling. Killing him is not really that interesting.
Especially as, once again, killing him does not undo any of the harm he has caused. But given that he is this big egghead he could actually do something good if he got to live. And yeah, also there is the fact that... You know... Given what we know about his backstory, his actions are about as understandable as those of some of the companions.
Some of you might already know, I have written some fics dealing with the way how I would imagine something like this to go. Mainly Hurt begets Hurt (which is basically my Tav convincing Gortash to give up), An Impossible Future (Karlach inner turmoil after her engine is fixed) and Cheesy Noodles (Gortash being a big meany towards Tav, who is unphased by this).
I am right now writing a story featuring Astarion dealing with a very, very depressed Gortash.
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mit0bee · 9 months
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Hii! Could you write Silver and Jamil with a s/o who is touch starved? In the sense they're not opposed to affection, but aren't that used to it and get kind of startled, but crave it nonetheless? Thank you so much, have a great night!
WHY IS THIS ME???? ill def be making a pt 2 because i love this so much
Twisted Wonderland Boys with an S/O who is touch starved
Stuff you should read: touch starved s/o, a tinyyyyyyyyyyy bit self indulgent because me too anon me too, bulleted post, i didnt use actual grammar/punctuation because i am lazy, once again no beta we die like men Characters: Silver Vanrouge, Jamil Viper, Malleus Draconia, Leona Kingscholar, Sebek Zigvolt, Lilia Vanrouge
SILVER VANROUGE
Silver first found out about your touch starved-ness when he accidentally fell asleep on your shoulder
When you shrieked softly in suprise, he shot up, thinking that he might've hurt you.
When you explained to him that you were just not used to physical contact, he sighed in relief.
i kid you not he genuinely thought he somehow headbutted you
And oooooooooohhhhhhhhhhh boy when he learned that you craved touch, the boy was so ecstatic (for his standards)
from then on, he was always somehow holding your hand, or had his head resting in your lap or something
(at first, he would ask you or warn you before he would touch you, just so you wouldn't be too suprised or startled, but if you were okay with it, and as you got more comfortable, he'd just go for it)
if you were okay with more romantic displays of affection, he'd nap during lunch with you in the courtyard, with you somehow in his embrace
hes such a pookie i swear (im sorry his is so short idk how to write silver *sob*
JAMIL VIPER
Jamil actually found out from a silly little walk to Sam's
he went to hold your hand, and you pulled away, surprised
he thought you were mad at him and when i tell you this man tried to think of a reason why you would be mad at him
when he couldnt think of anything, he decided to just come out and ask if he did something wrong
and then you explained it to him
like silver, he sighed in relief
but not a little sigh
a big one
like muscles relaxing and everything he genuinely thought you were mad at him.
so when you slowly brought your hand to his, lightly squeezing it, you almost killed him
my dude ASCENDED like he actually would die with no regrets
when he figures out that you actually crave touch, he isn't as ecstatic as silver, but hes fairly excited
he'd definitely enjoy showing that he loves you through small physical touches (hand holding, maybe having your arm around his, ect)
Again, like silver, he'd tell/ask you when/if he was going to hug you or something
he wouldn't ALWAYS be touching you, but he would be in private
he himself is kinda iffy on pda but he'd hold your hand or something, nothing like kissing or full on big hugs, but hand holding is a big one for him
you two probably came up with one of those cute systems where its like "two hand squeezes means ily" or something
MALLEUS DRACONIA
he found out when, on one of your nightly walks, he tried to hug you and you just...froze in the hug
he just comes straight out and asks, he doesn't want to assume you're mad at him, but he did do something wrong, he wants to apologize
"Child of Man, is everything alright? You froze."
when you explained that no, nothing is wrong and that you just were a little touch starved, he nodded thoughtfully
"Well then, would you be okay if I request a hug, instead?"
^^^ (all of these men are so polite omg)
when you say yes, he is very happy
if he had a tail, it would wag
you know those cute pictures of rlly tall people hugging their shorter friends, s/o's? thats what this becomes. he is just leaned over, hugging you
"tsunotarou....shouldn't you let go now...?"
give him a second
when he learns you crave physical touch HE IS LITERALLY SO HAPPY
i hc that one of his main love languages is physical touch, so he is VERY HAPPY that he gets to show you just how much he loves you
once again, is another who would start with telling you when he will touch you, but his telling phase ends fairly quickly compared to silver and jamil
his main forms of physical contact are those elegant ones like where he has a hand on the small of your back
he would ALWAYS BE TOUCHING YOU.
more than silver
tfym he cant come to your ancient curses class with you when he has potionology? he already knows everything he needs to know anyway, so why cant he hold your hand a little longer :(
will 9/10 times end up sleeping over at ramshackle big spooning you (the big spoon in me wants to big spoon malleus but maybeeeeeeeeeee ill save that for another post)
LEONA KINGSCHOLAR
he puts his head in your lap, and now youre shifting around?
come on herbivore smh smh you cant move so much hes trying to sleep!
when the thought eats a little too much at the back of his mind, he finally asks you whats up
when you explain it to him, he sighs and STAYS WITH HIS HEAD ON YOUR LAP.
but the only reason he keeps his head in your lap is because he knows his herbivore, and he knows all the signs that you're truly uncomfortable with something, so he knows that you don't mind
he breaks the cycle of asking. like i said before he knows his herbivore well, and he knows your boundaries and the signs that your uncomfortable even better, so he knows he won't overstep
i feel like he never had to figure out you craved attention, hes an observer, and just kinda always knew by your lingering touches, even after the shock of the touch
his favourite forms of physical touch are to lay his head in your lap, and basically anything (sexual or non sexual) where your body is on/close to his
hes another one whos main love language is touch, so he is too seen skipping his classes to hang out with you/to pull you from yours to the botanical garden
SEBEK ZIGVOLT
hes very aggressive with his affection, so when you shied away from his hug after training, he did a Jamil and tried to think of any reason you'd be mad at him
hes kinda sulking for the rest of the day until he decides to just come to ramshackle to ask you
"sebek wtf are you doing at my door its the middle of the night- WHY ARE YOU WET?!"
"I COULDN'T SLEEP THINKING YOU WERE MAD AT ME! PLEASE TELL ME WHAT I DID, SO I CAN PROPERLY ATONE!!!!!!"
"............what.................?"
you had to run and grab a towel because this idiot decided to WALK over while it was RAINING
when you explained everything to him, how you were just surprised, he understood immediately, so, he joins the Polite Cult (tm) and asks you to give you a hug
when he finds out you crave touch, he is a man on a MISSION
he WILL make sure you get what you want becuase he LOVES YOU SO MUCH
(just dont use your power over him when hes trying to protect malleus. he will become crisis'd about what to prioritize)
he loves to hold your hand sosososososo much its such a little gesture that can mean so much
hold his hand.
LILIA VANROUGE
he went to taze you (yk when you put your hands on someones waist and just pinch/tickle them while going ZZZZZT? yeah that) and you almost died of shock
hes seen many things, when your a prehistoric artifact like him, you know whats up
so you didnt even need to explain, he just kinda knew the second you screamed
hes also like leona in the sense he just knows you arent necessarily uncomfortable or anything
but he still tries to limit the amount he scares you but COME ON....your back is faced to him! its the perfect chance to scare you!
he, again, knew you needed more physical touch, so he's always stuck to you whenever he can be
not like skipping class level like malleus and leona, but he still is with you 90% of the day
another one to come to ramshackle with you, but he wont tell the others where he is so everyone thinks peepaw went missing
get peepaw to take his meds please hes a little deranged
--------------------------- I LOVED WRITING THIS SM but i was cramping the entireee time :( m.list @mit0ee 's work, please do not steal!
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iridescentdove · 6 months
Note
👏I👏AM👏TIRED
of seeing so many Yandere! BSD x Reader, and it’s always the character or everyone being Yandere for Reader, I have to request a Platonic! BSD x Yandere! Teen! Reader, in which Reader is in any organization of your choice, and since Reader is underage, they see said organization as their family, precious people that they hold dear to their hearts, and don’t wish for any of them to die or leave and abandon them. This triggers their Yandere instincts, and ultimately they kill anybody who’s hurt their darlings in any way or attempts to "steal" their attention or worse, guide them away from Reader.
LONELINESS NO MORE.
platonic!bsd x yandere!teen!reader
A/N: It's nice to go a bit gruesome sometimes lol- anyways, so I just decided to choose the PM for this.
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Let's just say you were similar to Dazai in a way. As a homeless young child, you had no home or family and friends to even call your own.
And to say the least? It was a little lonely.
This was something rather different, as you grew up to have an understanding that the world is never fair. Even before being taken into the Port Mafia by MORI, you were already much of an unhinged criminal yourself.
In a way, it was bad due to how young you were, but given this was a wretched world on it's own – many things can happen.
You killed, you stole, you did many things. At some point you probably rivaled Dazai's crime list because yours looked like an entire fucking receipt.
And that is what lesd you to the mafia.
MORI had found you, and went 'fuck it', deciding to just grab you and take you back with him to the base.
Well at first – you got a bit defensive, not knowing his real intention and thinking of fighting back yourself. But it was when he gave you new clothes, gave you food, and actually took responsibility of you was when you realized.
This man was just ... taking care of you.
And for the first time? You were really excited. It didn't take very long for you to grow accustomed to the Port Mafia.
Sure they made you do dangerous and gruesome missions, but you were used to it honestly. So it didn't matter that much. You met new faces and grew very attached to them, the dreaded loneliness that creeped into your heart grew into–
Obsession.
Yes, that's right. You found no other reason to dislike them at all, and they treated you like no one else ever did.
Like family.
CHUUYA was rather nice to you, despite his aggression and the rough edges he seems to pull off. Since you're underage, he drinks grape juice with you. Lmao ye, we love that shit. You liked being around him, defending him against accusations and giving him a shoulder to lean on.
He was like a brother to you. You adored most things about the fancy hat man. Scratch that, everything about him.
He releases one of those rare genuine smiles – mostly only to you, and he just thought you were the sweetest.
Oh, how wrong he was.
It was only one simple conversation. CHUUYA was talking to another mafia members in the lower ranks, discussing about the topic for the next PM meeting at hand.
Of course at first glance, they didn't look close at all. Just a normal chat between acquaintances. But did it make you mad?
Obviouely it did.
The very next day, the orange haired-man was looking for the same said man he spoke with the day before. Yet he was rather confused to see he wasn't around.
What the hell? Well that was weird, he could have sworn that he asked to meet them in this same spot right now.
Well, guess he wouldn't be meeting with them after all. In the distance, you were smiling – hiding that dead, cold expression on your face as you wiped the blood off the saw, a few splashee of blood and guts on the weapon.
But of course, you wouldn't let him know anything~ ♡
And simply, KOUYOU made it much easier. She was like a sweet, elder sister that spoiled you and taught you everything that you needed to know.
You simply loved her, and loved the times when you'd just hang around each other and dress one another up in various clothes. Be it trendy outfits or putting makeup on one another.
She took care of you as she should, and she grew very attached as well. KOUYOU was rather protective and sweet.
So when you saw her spoiling another girl in the picture, you were fucking livid.
How dare she pay more attention to another kid than you?
She was treating KYOUKA in private as if she was more important than you ever were. And it began to hardem your heart once more, growing angry at your elder sis paying more attention to some useless assassin.
You were way better than her, stronger even.
So imagine how relieved and prideful you felt when that girl had left the mafia to be with the detective agency instead. She wasn't even loyal! She doesn't deserve to be in the PM!
It left KOUYOU feeling agitated and sad, so you did what a younger sibling would do. You were the one comforting her, even manipulating her with your sweet words. You lured her in and had her give you more attention than before.
Just like how you wanted it to be.
AKUTAGAWA was honestly a tough nut to crack. You can easily tell he doesn't care about you at all. Well, he'd acknowledge your abilities a little but that's all you're getting.
But that won't stop you from killing those who tried to get even the slightest close to him.
After all, family members must stay with one another forever.
You didn't really mind much about that blonde girl who admires him and follows him around. It's not like she can take him away, he doesn't give a damn about her.
Plus, his sister was very nice! She gave you the love you needed, and she actually cared. Even though her brother was pretty cold, you'd think she also was – but in reality, GIN is a sweet, somewhat shy girl who gave you gifts and attention.
No matter which mafia member it was – wheneve ryou were with them, you were so sweet and caring, such an adorable teen who looks out for all of them and their wellbeing.
Yet behind closed doors, while they weren't looking, you glared daggers at other kids or people they payed attention to, your greedy self wanting all of it to yourself.
It wasn't fair.
It wasn't!
You never held back. You spilled their guts out, you ripped out those fools' hearts – crushing it under your foot, knowing you deserved the love more than their ignorants asses ever did.
And most of all? No one noticed a thing. MORI had continued to send you out mission after mission. He didn't notice the desperate pleads of those immature adults, the heartbreaking cries of those innocent children.
If it was for family, you'd do anything.
After doing all that – you give them a sickly sweet smile, as you pull them to hang out and play with you, no questions asked.
They never noticed.
And quite clear, you were a sadistic young teen. After being so pissed seeing those people getting close to them, it's like a breath of fresh air when you hear the bloodcurdling screams coming from their mouths.
TACHIHARA wasn't that observant, but he could tell that there was something not right about you at all. Yet, he himself was not free from the depths of your pure, honest love. He'll find himself spoiling you, loving you – like you're his very own sister.
He was going to fall into the trap whenever he likes it or not, because you love them way too much.
If someone else tries to destroy that happiness,
They'll just have to dissapear like the rest.
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calaisreno · 4 months
Text
Yes and No
“Do you love her?”
It had taken them less than thirty minutes to go from the Rizla game to just asking each other random questions. The only celebrities that Sherlock knew were nineteenth-century chemists and twentieth-century criminals, which had more or less spoiled the game, and Sherlock had declared it pointless.
Then he suggested Yes or No, which at least required some deductive reasoning, and John agreed. But Sherlock was very good at this game, having deduced nearly everything about John in the first days of their acquaintance. Without asking any question, he deduced that John would choose violin, a human liver, Mrs Hudson’s nephew, and Sherlock’s old mouse-coloured dressing gown.
John gives up. “Fine. What don’t you know about me?”
Do you love her is a real question, he gathers— from the look on Sherlock’s face, which is serious and a bit sad.
The answer, which should be yes, of course I love her, instead comes out, “I’m marrying her.”
“People marry for reasons other than—“ Sherlock stops, appearing to realise he is going in a direction that can only lead to bad feelings. “Sorry, not a fair question. Better: When did you know that you loved her?”
He remembers grief. The intense pain of the days after he saw Sherlock die on the sidewalk in front of Barts. There are few details he can recall after that moment. It was as if the pain had receded just enough to let him breathe, and a kind of grey fog had descended. Pain, then sorrow.
Somewhere during the sorrow part, Mary had appeared. She may have been there sooner, but he hadn’t noticed. At some point he became aware of her bringing him coffee, talking to him, urging him to come out for lunch. Always there, cheerfully bullying him back into life. Eventually he noticed that he wasn’t quite as sad, and that she was rather pretty.
But the pain was still there, a tender spot in his memory, and most days he still felt defeated. Mary helped, though, and he thought that if she stayed, everything would be easier. He didn’t need to explain; she understood. He could keep the memories at bay when she was around.
By then he was having sex with her. He didn’t remember exactly how that had begun. Maybe it was a pity fuck one night when he’d had too much to drink. He woke up in her bed hungover, waiting for the darkness to descend like a weight on his chest, and she was there, making him a cup of tea, urging him to have some toast, sweetly solicitous and not accepting any excuses.
Does he love her?
Sherlock is still looking at him, the question in his eyes.
“She was there when I needed someone,” he says. “I just knew.”
He’d known that morning that he needed to move on, to leave what had happened in the past and live his life. And there she was.
“Your turn,” Sherlock says.
John thinks of all the things he’s ever wanted to know about Sherlock, but has never asked because it has never seemed a good time. Sherlock has a way of warding off questions with just a look. An armour that does not allow anyone in, not even John. He’s wondered about a lot of things, but asking has never been an option. Sherlock never has to ask; he simply deduces. John is terrible at deductions, as Sherlock often reminds him.
“Have you ever been in love?”
Sherlock doesn’t hesitate. “Yes. Twice.”
“That was a yes-no question, so I get follow-up. So, the first. Who was he?”
Sherlock smiles. “You’re assuming it was a man.”
“Wasn’t it? I thought… you’re… erm…”
“Gay? Yes, I am.”
“You loved a man,” John says. Obviously.
“Well, a boy. I was twelve. I suppose it wasn’t love so much as infatuation and hormones. His name was Victor. I never told him until I met him again at uni.” He gives John one of those looks that makes him feel like he is being x-rayed. “Have you ever kissed a man?”
“I’m not gay,” he says at once. “I mean, why would I kiss a man if I knew I wasn’t gay?”
“Follow-up question, then. When did you know you were not gay?”
John’s mouth may have been open for a bit. It’s an odd question. Everybody knows they’re straight until something happens and they know they’re not. Isn’t that the way it works? “I just knew. When did you know you were gay?”
“When I was twelve. I was at a stupid birthday party my mother made me attend, and we were playing Forfeit. I was asked a question I didn’t like to answer and took the forfeit. Up until then the penalties were stupid things like singing a song or doing a dance, but this time it was kissing a girl. The girl was willing, and I was curious, so I agreed. That was when I realised girls weren’t my cup of tea, so to speak. I wanted to kiss Victor.”
John says nothing, though it’s his turn. He remembers a similar party, a boy who wanted to kiss him, and feeling terrified that his parents would find out if he did. Harry had just come out, and he was trying very hard to make up for all of her shortcomings.
Sherlock asks, “How do you know you’re not gay if you’ve never kissed a man?”
“I’ve kissed lots of women,” he replies. “I don’t need to kiss a man to know I’m not gay.”
Sherlock shrugs. “I assumed that I was like everyone else, that some day I would meet the right girl, get married, and have children. That was how it was supposed to work, and I thought there was something wrong with me because I didn’t like girls that way. All my fantasies were about boys, but I thought I would eventually be attracted to girls as I got older. That kiss told me I would never love a woman.”
“You think I should kiss a man just to see if I’m a bit gay?” He laughs.
“It’s your forfeit, for not having an answer.”
“I’m not going to kiss some random bloke just because you—“
“Not a random bloke. Me. Kiss me.”
This is dangerous ground. Somewhere in his libido lies something that he’s thought about. Maybe he’s even fantasised about kissing a man. Having sex with a man. Just a lark, maybe. Don’t lots of men go through that? It doesn’t mean anything.
But, Sherlock. He lived with him for a year and a half, and they’d been friends. And he grieved when Sherlock died. Not grieved like a friend. He’d lost friends before, and this was nothing like those losses. Pain, darkness, unending regret. Even after Mary, some of that darkness remained. Moments when he remembered something Sherlock had said or done, a stab of pain. If it hadn’t been for Mary—
And it came to him. Mary was balm for his wounds. She brought him back from the edge. He is grateful to her. But gratitude isn’t love. Being in such pain for so long, and then a bit of light— that isn’t love, it’s relief. He’s seen patients in physical pain become almost giddy when given a dose of something that takes their agony away, not even enough to make them high. Relief feels like intoxication when pain has gone on so long.
If it hadn’t been for Mary, he would have understood what he’d only begun to see. She helped him, saved him even. But she was a distraction from the pain, not a cure.
He glances at Sherlock, who is pulling back, looking like he wishes he hadn’t just asked for a kiss. Maybe he’ll make a joke about their game, move them towards goodnight, goodbye, see you at the wedding.
“Yes,” he says. It’s an answer to everything— regret, grief, sorrow, love. It’s an apology for not seeing sooner, for the night at the Landmark, for his anger and cruel rejection of the man he has loved for years. “Kiss me.”
* * * * * * * * * *
Sherlock is right. The kiss tells John things he’s tried hard to forget. It tells him that has loved men before, but called it friendship, that he has wanted to touch men and kiss them, and called it lust, or fantasy, or a phase that all men go through. Women attract him too, and he grabbed onto heterosexuality like a life-raft because he was afraid of the alternative. His sister and his father, yelling. Harry thrown out of the house. His father, looking at him, saying not you too. Never you, my boy.
The kiss tells him that has already met the love of his life.
“I need to call Mary,” he says when they break away.
Sherlock looks sad. He nods. “Of course.”
“One more question,” John says. “Who was the second person you loved?”
“It doesn’t matter.”
“It does,” he says. “I’m about to call my fiancee and break our engagement just days before the wedding because I’m in love with my best friend. So please, answer the question.”
Sherlock’s face does something John has never seen. It crumples and tears fill his eyes, and then he’s laughing and crying and not able to speak.
John kisses him again.
Author note: This is an old ficlet, from Trifles, posted here.
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calisources · 12 days
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𝐑𝐎𝐘𝐀𝐋 𝐒𝐂𝐇𝐄𝐌𝐈𝐍𝐆, 𝐁𝐄𝐓𝐑𝐀𝐘𝐀𝐋, 𝐇𝐄𝐀𝐑𝐓𝐁𝐑𝐄𝐀𝐊 𝐀𝐍𝐃 𝐂𝐎𝐔𝐑𝐓𝐋𝐘 𝐃𝐄𝐒𝐈𝐑𝐄𝐒.
All sentences on this meme have been taking from different media and sources. They all touch on the topics of romance, difficult and forbidden love, mostly setting in the political schemes of war and peace and royal court. Change names, locations and nouns and you see fit. Some lines might have foul language.
Sometimes we hurt the ones we love, but hurting ourselves to avoid it doesn’t make it better.
Could someone treat you badly and still love you? 
Even so, in the midst of this complicated love, there is a holy union.
Love is complicated. It’s sticky. It’s bliss and it’s a mix of emotions. It’s not easy.
I hated him now because I has loved him then.
 I'm not like you. I can't afford to be reckless.
When have I ever, since the first instant I touched you, pretended to be anything less than in love with you?
Are you so fucking self-absorbed as to think this is about you and whether or not I love you, rather than the fact I'm an heir to the fucking throne? 
You at least have the option to not choose a public life eventually, but I will live and die in these palaces and in this family.
She wears a crown that never should’ve been hers.
Your wish is my command, my queen.
You can always leave my service.
Don’t you see, Diana? If I did that, I’d break not one but two hearts. For I know you love me, though you haven’t said it yet.
You do know me. I love you so much, it sometimes terrifies me.
You are going to regret that, Your Magical Regalness.
Just because I am  a prince doesn’t make my life a fairy tale.
So kiss the others for all I care, but don’t hold back with me.
You are enough to drive a saint to madness or a king to his knees.
He didn't marry you to become king. He became king because he wanted to marry you.
I know I have but the body of a weak and feeble woman, but I have the heart and stomach of a king.
 I believe we are what we make ourselves, and as such, you, Crown Princess, are nothing.
You, what are you? The brat of lucky parents who were related to a childless king.
Rule with the heart of a servant. Serve with the heart of a king.
There’s a fine line between gossip and history, when one is talking about kings.
You can't treat royalty like people with normal perverted desires.
We kings do develop a certain ability to recognize objects under our noses.
...alone is such a nebulous state when one is queen.
I respect you as my king, and I respect you as my father, but I do not respect you as a man.
You're the most important person I've ever met.  And I should have never met you at all.
Desires are what can most easily ruin us, lovely.
I find that happiness can always be recollected in tranquillity, Ma’am.
It's almost impossible for those who have had an intimate relationship to return to a formal one.
I question if within you is any magic.
You’re my princess, right? You were always going to be my princess, no matter what you were born.
The king is a saint and cannot rule, and his son is a devil and should not.
For kings, the world is extremely simplified: All men are subjects.
A king deserves reverence when being addressed.
Yes, she had abused her title and station before, but for minor stuff, not to steal a warship.
You are a king worthy of their allegiance . . . with a queen full of fire and promise.
When God calls you into His Kingdom, your way of life will reflect royalty if you serve Him with loyalty.
My royal status is both a shield that protects me and a sword that impales my heart.
You know, for a pampered princess, you have a certain gift for violence.
I have to be seen to be believed.
Kings needn’t raise their voices to be heard.
That is your very own myth. The idea that how you are born or the name you are given dictate the sort of person you really are.
I know that names have power. That is why I cannot let her forget hers. 
You’ll have to face it, Princess. Maybe not today or tomorrow, but soon enough. And you can’t be this scared when the time comes.
A bad king revels in his importance. A good one hates his office. 
Crowns belong to those that serve.
She was their witch queen, and they adored her.
Beatrice is going to be queen someday.
Kings are only kings because one ancestor was quicker than another to place a crown on his own head.
Queen, do not allow a commoner to dethrone you. Own that throne. You are royalty.
A throne won in blood will soon be drenched in it.
My mother once told me that everything is fuelled by either money or sex, because both lead to power.
Even when she's dethroned by hardship, she still wears the sun as a crown.
She holds a nation’s fate within her shaking hands. She wears a crown that never should’ve been hers.
My reign has been anything but traditional. Let’s not start now, shall we?
Oh honey, someday a real man is going to make you see stars and you won't even be looking at the sky.
Every girl thinks about growing up in a palace. Few ever ponder living in a cage.
Climb up the family tree of any of them high enough and you’ll find a commoner who dared to take a chance.
Am I forbidden to do what all may do?
My arrival saved the kingdom, while his only reiterated that his blood would fill the throne one day.
Slow down there, princess. How do you know what kind of first impression you gave me?
So none of the young men we encountered during our season gave you hot pants for them?
If stubborness were all that was needed to be a good queen, I'd rule the world.
I’d decided that I was going to stop dressing like a princess and start dressing like a queen.
Don’t touch me. Don’t tell me how beautiful my eyes are, how soft my hair is, how you love to hear my voice. Don’t. Don’t pretend you are falling in love with me. 
I know you are lying, and every word you say hurts even more. 
Before the wedding, and the bedding, when I will have to take you as my lord and husband?
I may not be a king or a queen, but I'll be damned if I'm not treated like royalty.
He is fragile, like a prince of ice, of glass.
It is natural that men are going to gather round me, hoping for a smile.
Men only treat women like princesses when they want to use them like prostitutes.
You can smile when your heart is breaking because you're a woman.
I can't sleep, I can't eat, I can't do anything but think about him.
Anyone can attract a man. The trick is to keep him.
To save my son, I would plot with the devil himself.
Only fools wait when their enemies are coming, to see if they may prove to be friends.
When a man wants a mystery, it is generally better to leave him mystified. Nobody loves a clever woman.
I wanted the heat and the sweat and the passion of a man that I could love and trust.
I am a fool to own it, but I am in a fever for your touch.
And you are the sort of mistress a man doesn't bother to marry. Sons or no sons.
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