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#yes I DO think deuce suits being called a wife i am just
twstwonderlandstuff · 2 years
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calling the twisted boys your husband/wife! (heartslabyul ver. [1/7])
established relationship, still dating
gn! reader
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riddle rosehearts
“oh, yes, and my husband would like some of your confectionary, if that’s okay?”
when riddle hears this, his head whips up from his doctor (?) work so fast you’d think HE needs the hospital. he turns red in a millisecond and impatiently waits for you to finish your call.
“what in the Great Seven was that for?!”
he doesn’t say it, but he’s very pleased and will start making plans for the future. he WILL pout if you don’t call him that again, so please appease your husband's wishes <3
trey clover
“oh… uh huh, right… is there a set of toothbrushes i can get? my wife is interested in them, you see.”
he stops doing whatever he’s doing and blinks, before laughing and letting you continue your work. he’s pleased, but doesn’t make too much of a fuss about it. probably uses it to tease you instead.
cater diamond
“so, girly, listen- my wife’s a fan of roller skates, so do you any recommendations on where you get the good ones…?”
he’s uncharacteristically flustered- his skin burns red, and he hides behind a pillow as he frantically texts you ‘WHY DID YOU DO THAT WHY DID YOU DO THAT’
bloody fucking loves it he WILL sulk and not respond if you don’t call him that anymore.
“cater.. love? beloved? cay-cay? sweetheart?”
“...”
“my wife-”
“YES???”
ace trappola 
“yes sir, that’s my husband right there- ACE STOP THAT RIGHT NOW YOU ASS-”
he, indeed, stops at whatever he’s doing to just stare at you… and attempt to tease you for your ‘slip up’, like he doesn’t fuckin’ love it or whatever (oh you).
“eh… you must REALLY want to marry me, huh?”
“yeah, actually.”
“o-oh, w-w-what…? aha… ahahaha…”
he’s honored- thrilled, really. for someone to want him so much is just so… ‘SLDKFNVASDLKFNVASDLKFN’
he’ll get so clingy on that day i pray for u
deuce spade
“yes, my wife’s name is deuce spade… oh, and put some chickens beside that, okay?”
deuce gapes like a fish when he hears it. he’s.. you… he’s your WHAT?!? 
he won’t tell you to hurry your call, but his body language tells you enough and when you do, he’s tearing up, asking if you really do want him as your wife, but that he isn’t sure that he’s good enough and-
you silence him with a kiss, and that’s all the reassurance he needs. you cuddle for the rest of your day <3
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harunayuuka2060 · 6 months
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Grandma MC: Please excuse my grandchildren. They are only worried. *chuckles*
Eirian: *smiles softly at her* It's fine with me. Don't worry.
Ace and Deuce: Tch.
Malleus: I don't like this man. This date is over.
Vil: We're going to end it if he does something inappropriate. For now, let's observe.
Rook: Oui! Let's give Monsieur a chance.
Ruggie: I don't understand why Grim gets to be with Granny though. What's he gonna do there? Annoy her suitor?
Ace: Huh? That's why he's there? Dude, the guy already won him over!
*Grim eating the snacks brought by Eirian*
Leona: Is there any surprise to that?
Grandma MC: Anyway, I think we should need to start this conversation. *smiles at him*
Eirian: Yes. As you are already aware of, I'm here to win your heart and with your permission, to be my wife.
Grandma MC: How sweet of you and you seem to be a kind gentleman. However, why would you be interested to an old woman like me?
Grandma MC: I'm sure you have a lot of women chasing after you. *chuckles*
Eirian: Indeed there are. Though I am not and will never be interested to any of them except you.
Eirian: You have captured my heart, my lady. And my feelings have never changed even after fifty years have passed.
Ruggie: Fif—
Ruggie and Ace: FIFTY YEARS?!!
Vil, Rook, and Riddle: *who already knew about the details so they were not shocked but were amused to see others' reaction*
Malleus: *dumbfounded*
Leona: Damn. That was such a long time ago.
Grandma MC: Oh dear... Why would you wait that long?
Azul: *nods* Yeah. I agree. That is a no-brainer.
Kalim: Come on! It's true love!
Jamil: Kalim, can you imagine Granny getting married to a young man who looks like our age? It doesn't matter if he's old, he still looks young.
Kalim: But... Can't he make her younger?
Jamil and Azul: ...
Azul: With all due respect, shut your mouth.
Kalim: Eh?
Jamil: If someone hears you— *sigh*— Just don't speak for the time being, Kalim.
Eirian: I can wait for you even for a thousand years— No. An eternity. The only reason I didn't pursue was because you were married.
Grandma MC: ...
Grandma MC: But I don't remember ever meeting you.
Grandma MC: To be honest, I thought it was my first time arriving here in Twisted Wonderland.
Eirian: *sad frowns* It seems your memories had been erased. Though I can assure you that we had met. I have evidences and the fact that you used to call me 'Rian'.
Grandma MC: My... Well, it does suit you. I'm glad I had given you a beautiful nickname. *chuckles*
Eirian: *blushes*
Ace: *yells* GRANNY!!!! YOU'RE MAKING HIM FALL IN LOVE!
Ace: STOP BEING NICE!
Vil: *kicks him* Who gave you the permission to yell at Granny?
Epel: Yeah! Yell at the guy! Not her!
Rook: Himeringo, that isn't good too.
Malleus: ...
Malleus: I'm ending this date now.
Riddle and Vil: Not yet!
Leona: So who are we really watching over here? You're all a mess.
Eirian and Grandma MC: *have talked for a few hours; mostly Granny listening to him of how they had met*
Eirian: It remained a mystery to me how you had arrived to the underworld and how it became possible for you to befriend the creatures living there.
Eirian: Normally, a human would run away in fear, but you... *smiling* You had held them in your arms like they were adorable and tiny.
Grandma MC: Well, they do sound adorable so I do not see the problem. *chuckles softly*
Eirian: ...
Eirian: *pulls out something from his pocket*
*It was the Sundrop Flower*
Eirian: My lady, I have a present for you.
Grandma MC: What a lovely flower...
Eirian: This flower can bring back your youth.
Eirian: *smiles reassuringly* Don't worry. I won't be asking you to answer me now.
Eirian: I'm giving this to you so you will be able to travel some places here in Twisted Wonderland.
Grandma MC: Why, how kind of you. I shall treasure this gift. *smiles*
Eirian: ...
Eirian: *hugs her*
Epel, Ace, Ruggie, and Deuce: GET YOUR HANDS OFF GRANNY!!!!
Malleus: *ready to cause havoc*
Grandma MC: *chuckles* You must leave now. My grandchildren are angry.
Eirian: I'll see you again.
Riddle: You all are embarrassing.
Leona: Except me. I was totally cool back there.
Vil: What is that flower, Granny?
Grandma MC: Oh, it is a gift from Rian. *smiles*
Idia: Isn't that the Sundrop Flower? Rumored to bring back youth?
Kalim: Bring back youth?
Idia: Yes. But they disappeared from existence years ago.
Azul: Does that mean...
The boys: ...
The boys: USE IT, GRANNY! WE WANT TO SEE!
Grim: Mryah! What's with you all?!
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cyrelia-j · 6 years
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[Fic] Deuces II: Knights (Garak/Bashir)
Yeah it's a continuation of that story though I completely blame @eilupt for the direction it took with all the tattoo talk. More Pre Garashir but it's definitely there haha (Also, it got long)
Part 1 if you missed it
AU (no Dominion) Garak and his surrogate daughter Ziyal find themselves on Deep Space Nine on a stopover to Bajor. Now having secured a date with the attractive doctor both Garak and Julian find themselves getting ready for the evening with a little help.
“Are you going to tell me what the handsome doctor whispered to you yad’, or am I going to have to audit you?” Ziyal’s works the oil into the scales of his bare shoulders firmly. One of her fingers is already insinuating itself behind a sensitive spot near his shoulder blade making Garak twitch. She knows all of his weaknesses. The “audit” is the euphemism he used to use for his previous occupation’s primary function when she was younger. It strangely grew to mean a nerve rending tickle torture between the two of them to get answers to silly inconsequential questions. Garak looks ahead stoically. He absolutely refuses to break this time. “Though I may owe you a debt of gratitude, my dear I assure you that I will not crack even under the worst torture.” He can feel her making a childish face behind him. It certainly won’t help her case but they both know that there are certain aspects of Garak’s dates and relationships that he prefers to keep private. She in turn, refuses to this day to tell him exactly what had gone on between her and that wild child Rugal behind the back wall of the garden.
Ziyal flicks one of the ridges of his neck. “Fine. But I’m not going to tell you anything that Major Kira and I talk about tonight either.” She absolutely will, but Garak allows her that moment, relaxing as she rubs more warm oil between hers hands and starts carefully working the scales of his back. The oil is a careful blend designed to make ones’ scales shimmer majestically while not ruining the delicate fabric of the underlining of his shirt. Ziyal insisted that he wear the dark red silk with the high neckline. “Better to give him a lot to wonder about, right?” Garak had agreed when he saw it coupled with the dark black pants she suggested. They were a touch immodest but then again with Julian’s incredibly forward invitation modesty is hardly his main priority. 
“I suppose that leaves us at an impasse,” Garak declares dramatically. Ziyal laughs softly behind him. He’s seated on the bed with her kneeling at his back rubbing the oil excitedly like she used to when she was younger. His first date since becoming her adopted father years ago was a mess of nerves and he’d nearly pulled something, causing an awful ruckus trying to reach every spot himself. She’d come in fourteen, snippy, but still such a sweet girl deep down finally offering to help. When she went out with Rugal- a privileged misfit like herself, Garak’s intel had revealed- a short chaperoned time later, Garak had returned the favor. He also learned the proper high fashion styles for pinning up her hair. She learned his as well and even convinced him to let her tint his chufa a daring blue when he was feeling particularly lucky. He’s asked her to do it tonight as well. It’s a ritual that’s been going on more than half her life and Garak thinks sometimes that he’s going to miss it whenever that inevitable end comes.
But he doesn’t allow that melancholy to overtake him. He’s looking forward to an exciting evening, though he has a hunch that Julian may have played some small part in the Bajoran Officer Kira’s sudden invitation to show Ziyal around the station and tell her more about Bajor. Yes, doctor, I’m sure the busy Major Kira would absolutely take a precious free evening to play hostess to a station guest she’s never met before. Garak has learned though, rough lesson that it’s been, not to question good fortune: at least not terribly much. His head lurches forward and he hums contentedly when Ziyal’s hands reach the small of his back. He won’t look tonight, their quarters not having a suitable array of mirrored surfaces, but he can imagine the picture of brilliant color that will display when she finishes.
Ziyal is an artist, though not entirely of sculptures and paintings. She developed a fascination with the permanent Cardassian scale dying or what he’s learned the humans and Bajorans call “tattoo artistry” or some variant. Garak had thought it a bit strange at first, but he saw the beautiful works that she was able to create with pen and ink and when she told him in earnest that she wanted to learn how to put her picture permanently on the body so people could hold the image forever well he just had to go and find an enterprising artist to teach her. Tarn Belor had been hesitant at first to teach such precious cultural tradition given her obvious lineage but Garak could be nothing if not convincing. So she had learned with care, practice, her first serious pieces done both on the insides of her own forearms. Both Garak and Tarn thought she was out of her mind but she insisted that if she could manage it on her own body while under the duress of the small laser injections to permanently alter the scale pigment then she could to it to anyone. She was right.
Garak was her first big project after seeing with wonder the small symbol of Bajor, the Cardassian union, and her mother’s face. He bears one of her most beautiful and intricate pieces on his back: a stunning view of the beach outside their home viewed through a stunning copse of trees. He has several other tattoos that she’s down for him since on his arms and chest as well but that remains his favorite. Dukat had felt- as he could hardly allow his enemies to know that Ziyal was his own daughter- that the last lush rainforests of the Morfan Province were best suited to remind his beloved Tora Naprem of Bajor and give Ziyal a small taste of the other home she might someday know. Garak had supposed if he were already doomed to the stigma of having a Bajoran “wife” and “child” as his cover that the lovely scenery was the least that they could pay him with. Only the three of them and Enabran Tain himself knew her true father and well as far as Garak is concerned-
“I’m going to do your hair now, yad’,” Ziyal informs him crawling off the bed to get the brushes and the hair slick. Garak smiles at her, thinking she looks more excited than he is, but he understands. Charity or no, Major Kira is doing Ziyal an immeasurable favor in indulging all her questions and curiosity for the night. He stands, putting the undershirt on first, then overlaying the red silk already having gotten a feel for the chill temperature of the station. He imagines it must have been far warmer when it was still Terok Nor. Oh but surely, Julian should be warm enough for the both of you. Garak’s smile turns a bit wicked at that thought. Julian’s little tease had played so immediately to the exact sort of fun that Garak is looking to have. And that lovely boy looked more than game for it.
Garak sits back down seeing Ziyal rush out with both the oil and clay, a brow ridge moving at the sight of both. Just how strong a hold does she think his hair is going to need on a first date? She grins at him not quite innocently. “Like you always say, it’s better to be prepared than to find yourself in a group of your enemies without a sharp knife.” He supposes he has said that on more than one occasion and he wonders if he shouldn’t have at least tried for a more traditional upbringing. Well hardly the time to have doubt about it all now, Elim. “Do you really think I’ll need a knife too, Yaya?” he asks, shutting his eyes as her fingers start combing oil through his hair and over his scalp. He can tell even behind him that her nose is making that precious little wrinkle.
“Ah! You win. I don’t need to know everything about your date tonight.” His throat vibrates with a low  rumble of amusement as Ziyal continues to work following that exaggerated exclamation of parental sex picturing disgust. Garak isn’t quite sure what future a half Cardassian tattoo artist and a former Obsidian Order spy turned tailor are going to have on Bajor, but Garak guesses as Ziyal has been saying the adventure lies in the mystery. “Still,” she continues cheerfully and Garak knows that he’s nurtured her curiosity far too well from childhood. “We don’t choose the truth that we’d like to hear but sit as willing ears when it spills from the vessels we nurture.” Such a pretty euphemism for such a cruel profession and she recites it back like one of Tolan’s old Hebetian proverbs. Guls, Julian better watch out if this becomes serious!
“So are you gonna ask him he he wants to give Cindy a kiss?” Miles O’Brien sits lazily on the couch in Julian’s quarters half reading the latest report from Engineering on the PADD. Julian pokes his head out of the bathroom momentarily to answer him. “Absolutely not! Are you mad? It’s a first date, Miles!” “Aw, c’mon Julian, that’s what you ask all the pretty girls isn’t it?” Julian takes a step out having already switched from the light blue button down, to the white linen, to the gray “second skin” and back again. “That was one time!” he protests a bit too loudly. He’s at least settled on the pants; they’re his favorite ultra slim stretch black number that settle low on his hips. In spite of what Miles says he has hips they’re just a bit well... slim.
“First date or not, those Cardies move fast. You and that last fella almost closed the place down, didn’t ya?” Miles makes a sour face at that, having had the misfortune of witnessing a good part of that whole thing. Cindy had made an appearance for that one too. Cindy, being the infamous tattoo that Julian has on the inside of his right thigh. She’s quite lovely, really. He still isn’t quite sure of how the two of them came to form their unlikely partnership. The accounting varies widely depending on which old classmate of his he asks and even then on the occasion and the party the story is being relayed for. One account has a twenty three year old Julian getting the elaborate piece on a bet. Another has him doing it as part of a dare to impress a beautiful Betazoid classmate. Yet a third- and his personal favorite- involves a Klingon rite of passage, blood wine, and two Andorran girls fighting over him. The commonality in all the accounts is that he was completely trashed and woke up the next morning with a burning inner thigh thinking he’d scored something fierce only to come face to face with Cindy.
Julian isn’t sure why “Cindy” and no one has ever been able to fill in that part of the mystery. All he knows is that his right thigh bears a stunning rendition of a young blonde human women with blue eyes and a pretty red pout puckering up for a kiss. As ludicrous as the tattoo is, it’s quite stunning in its detail and Julian decided in the end to keep her as a valuable life lesson. He may have also in his more stupid (read: also drunk) moments tried and kiss her himself, finding in the process that he’s a great deal more flexible that he’d thought. That’s proven useful on some of his more enduring dry spells. He hopes Garak appreciates it. The “last fella” to which Miles refers was an adventurous Cardassian trader named Mekor who absolutely appreciated it and even more so when Julian called him “sir”.
“Yes... well...” Julian turns his head with a scratch of his neck not wanting to revisit that embarrassing night when Captain Sisko had shook his head like he was lecturing Jake and just told him to go sleep it off. “It wasn’t a first date in any case and he had to leave rather abruptly so well... You know how it is when you’re not going to see your partner for awhile.” Julian gives a bit of a tease back. Miles had been unbearable when Keiko was on Bajor, “enjoying the bachelor life” or not, there were some types of single excursions that they couldn’t exactly share. Julian was pretty sure if she’d been gone any longer he’d have started rubbing on the furniture.
“Yeah, and speaking of Keiko, if I wanted to watch someone running around throwing clothes all over I could go back home.” “Don’t you still have to get ready?” Julian asks in complete earnest. Miles draws himself up looking just a touch offended. “And what’s wrong with what I already got on?” Julian looks at him sitting there in his uniform. Miles had initially stopped by to ask Julian if he might be able to look after Molly while the two enjoyed a couples’ evening. Julian had apologized letting him know as he tried to sort through three pairs of shoes that Miles swore all looked the same that he’d love to but he already had plans. Miles had taken one look at him, his quarters and with a dramatic sigh shook his head. When Julian asked him about it he pressed a mock hand to Julian’s forehead and declared that Julian may be the doctor but Miles knew a sure case of “Cardie Fever” when he saw it. Alright, so he wasn’t exactly entirely wrong about that one but still.
“Nothing it’s just well... it’s your uniform,” Julian points out brilliantly. “It’s clean!” “Right yes but it’s ah...” “Jeez!” Miles says throwing his hands up. “You oughta be standing here with my wife instead of me, it’s like talking to a mirror of her tonight!” “You clean up quite nicely,” Julian offers apologetically. Miles grumbles as he swipes down on the PADD. “Yeah, s’too late for flattery. ‘m sure the both of you are in it together. You don’t look so bad yourself,” he says by way of peace offering. Julian looks down not sure if it’s quite the look that he wants to convey. Not with the proposition that he’d made. He doesn’t want to look too young either but he’s hardly trying to project an air of stiff buttoned up doctor so...
“Thank you! So... er... skin or skin tight?” he asks thinking that Jadzia might give a better opinion but then again all the station would know that “Doctor Bashir is on another lizard hunt.” So help him if he ever finds the person who coined that irritating phrase... “You can’t do both?” Miles asks giving what Keiko might call in exasperation an “uncivilized unhelpful” opinion. Maybe Julian should drop in on Keiko. Then again, if she’s in half the dire fashion straits that he is then that would hardly be fair. No, he’s just going to have to trust his instincts on this one. The blue button down- with a few buttons down- it is. “Right, no. I think this will have to work.” Julian isn’t quite certain how far this will go in one night, but he’s an eternal optimist and he needs to get a start on straightening his quarters just in case. Well perhaps an optimist with a touch of schemer thrown in seeing as how he’d promised Kira anything she wanted if she could find it in her heart to keep a lonely half Bajoran girl company and ease some of her fears about seeing home for the first time.
Kira is a saint, Julian decides, and Miles is... taking up space on a sofa that he needs to clean. Perhaps he’ll get the hint if Julian just starts and saves the thing for last. “So ya think he’s some sort of spy?” Miles asks suddenly making Julian stop. “A what? A spy? Oh come on, Miles, he’s just a man taking a trip with his daughter.” “Two Cardies going to Bajor?” he replies skeptically. “A Cardassian man and his half Bajoran daughter,” Julian corrects. He hadn’t ben able to stay and chat much longer before his shift had started, but Ziyal had let him know that her father was a rather talented tailor and he was making a terribly noble sacrifice in uprooting his entire business so that she could see and experience her other home. She said that he wouldn’t dream of just sending her off into the wild and god, that protectiveness was just all sorts of sexy. It was obvious he adored her, obvious he was a man with an eye for detail, for beauty and those hands.
“You got that look, Julian,” Miles notes and he’s not quite sure what “look” that’s supposed to be. “That kinda funny “daydreaming about your date” look”, Miles finishes like he’s just read his mind. Julian clears his throat as he picks up a few more shirts. “Well, I do,” he says with what Keiko calls his “shouganai shrug” (it can’t be helped!). Miles rolls his eyes and actually has the good grace to extricate himself from the sofa and head towards the door. “Yeah yea, I know. Better make myself scarce before you really start going on about him.” “Saving that for after the date right,” Julian answers with a cheeky grin. “Right, make sure you tell me all about it. Every last detail.” Heavy on the sarcasm. Julian laughs and Miles claps him sincerely on the shoulder. “
Have a good time, Julian,” He says making his exits to a few brief goodbyes. Julian supposes that he does perhaps have that far off day dreamy look to him but if Miles had seen those eyes, those hands, that thick body, that strong grip and the way Garak’s eyes darkened so nicely when he called him “daddy”... Okay yeah, he still wouldn’t get it because he’s Miles O’Brien and not Julian Bashir hopeless “daddy lizard queen” as Jadzia calls him between the two of them but that’s neither here nor there.  Julian’s getting goosebumps just thinking about his date and he hurries up with his cleaning. After all, he wouldn’t want Garak to think that he’s not a good boy. At least not yet!
(Link to Part 3 if you want to keep going)
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