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#yeonjun au
hyunluvscreamy · 1 year
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𝗬𝗲𝗼𝗻𝗷𝘂𝗻 𝗺𝗮𝗸𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝘆/𝗻 𝘀𝗰𝗿𝗲𝗮𝗺🎧
(audio)
note: she actually screams so PLS wear headphones
yeonjun’s always rougher after not seeing you in awhile
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gxhaode · 10 months
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Anonymously Famous
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pairing: choi yeonjun x female reader
genre: comedy, fluff, non idol!au, college!au, slight angst
synopsis: In the ordinary life of an 18-year-old, where school days were dull and repetitive, a remarkable secret was hidden. Unlike your peers, you possessed a unique gift—a mesmerizing voice that enchanted millions as a famous singer-songwriter. Despite the adoration and fame, you remained anonymous, with no one knowing your true face or name. This added complexity to your already challenging double life.
While navigating the demands of fame and concealing your true self, a twist of fate revealed that your crush was a devoted fan of your music. The discovery thrilled and frightened you, as you grappled with the dilemma of how to explore this connection without exposing your secret.
As you wrestled with conflicting emotions, seeking solace in the unwavering support of your quirky and devoted friends, the boundaries of your two worlds began to blur. The challenges of managing your public image and guarding your true self grew ever more daunting, even as the allure of a genuine connection with your crush beckoned. Every interaction became fraught with the weight of secrets, as you tiptoed the fine line between preserving your carefully constructed identity and indulging the sparks of romance that danced between you.
Featuring: txt, enhypen, aespa
warnings: kys jokes, swearing
Schedule: Monday-Wednesday
Taglist: OPEN
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Socials:
⋆。°✩| y/ns managers, yeonjun’s kids
Chapters:
1#★-snort flour
2#☆-violating a cola can
3#★-taehyun im scared
4#☆-YOUVE ANGERED IT
5#★-zimzalabim TF OUTTA HERE
6#☆-hes jake sized
7#★-kys.
8#☆-bad indigestion?
9#★-tired yeonjun=hinged yeonjun
10#☆-Space Mountain
11#★-SOOBIN QUESTION TIME
12#☆-soobout
13#★-denial is a river in egypt
14#☆-*twirls hair* and then what aha
15#★-bitch try me
16#☆-resting bitch face (Written)
17#★-smooshin booties
18#☆-declog urself girl
19#★-deal(Written)
20#☆-extra long baguette
21#★- Taehyuns glitching
22#☆-Sunghoon’s inner manager has been unleashed
23#★-I CHOOSE PAVEMENT
24#☆-🤨🦶🏻🖕🏻
25#★-im too sober for this shit
26#☆-JYP PAPI?
27#★Life360
28#☆WHO IS THAT AT ATTRACTIVE FUCKER
tba
Taglist: @suzirumas @soobsfairy444 @hwaseyes @emohazuzworld @captivq @aestheticsluut @sserafimez @sohnfile @melodymyangel @s00buwu @lixie-phoria @tocupid @samisubi @cookiehaos @mackjestic @sunnyglower @blamemef0rit @choijxn @vocaloshin @en-dream @l0ve-joy @a-l-i-y-a @mrowwww @axo-l0tl @n034sy @flowerbe0m @il0vebeomgyu @j-3-nnie @rosabella1009 @loveliestsong @unclassifiedwhore @salsateriyniki @tae-ology @woniesyn @fanfangying1304 @calumsfringe @pikapikapikaachuu @lily-loves-kpop @mochijjunie @enhaqle @cheekycountesschoi @run2seob @yunwonie @cheesemonky @staryuyu @ye0nvibezzn @hanniemylovelyquokka @bee-the-loser @hyunfm
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gyuarchives · 10 months
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in a better moment, at a better timing. | choi yeonjun, oneshot.
sypnosis: ex!yeonjun is trying to win you back, after a few months of breaking up. He never stops trying, until the last and final moment just as he was about to give up.
word count: 2k words.
genre: angst, happy ending, slice of life, student life.
warnings: constant mentions of smoking, arguing, fighting.
A/N: yay my first ever post! this isn't a really good oneshot for a first impression, but i had an idea that i just wanted to get it over and done with. I will be posting alot more as I have more works on the way <3 im open to constructive criticism though, just send me a message :)
“Just, enough, Choi Yeonjun. How far do you want to go? Huh? How many times do you want to do this?” you aggressively shook off his hand from your wrist that was gripping hard enough to leave red marks. 
“But baby please, I told you I am at fault, that argument from months ago shouldn't have happened if I didn’t get so upset. I know I was shitty but please, let me make things right, yeah?” 
He just had to bring this up as you accidentally bumped into him on campus before getting into class. Knowing he would not just give up, you tugged him to the back of your building, where most of the students go to smoke. Lucky for you, no one was there at that moment. 
You sighed at the sight of your ex-boyfriend looking down at you with genuine eyes, rubbing his palms together in guilt like it was a Sunday morning during church service. To ease the pain you were feeling in your temples, you took out a cigarette stick, lighting it up and taking a deep inhale, feeling the burn hitting the back of your throat. You leaned on the wall, head tilting as you exhale. 
Yeonjun looked at you with mouth agape and eyes widening. 
“Since... when do you smoke babe...?” 
“Since you broke up with me. I’m not your ‘babe’ anymore, stop calling me that.”
“I thought you hated smokers? That's why I stopped smoking in front of you.” 
“And I thought you hated my guts? Why come back for the fifth time now?” 
 He grew silent. 
“...I don’t. I have never hated you?” 
Your giggle turned into a full on laughter. 
“Really? Choi Yeonjun, you’re fucking funny. Didn’t know you took comedy classes after we broke up.” 
He took a few steps closer to you, inching closer to your face. His cologne was overpowering the cigarette smell, but all of your senses stopped working once he locked eyes with you. You seriously hoped his shadow and the gloomy sky were helping to cover your face that was getting red. 
“I’m serious, yn.” 
He took the cigarette resting on your lips in between his own index and middle fingers, and took a hit. He leaned on the wall next to you, looking up at the sky, wondering if it was going to rain. 
You couldn’t even ask him back for your stick because you were still stupidly flustered with the close proximity with your ex. Admittedly, you do still love him; but, you can’t blame yourself because you didn’t ask for the breakup, you just accepted it and (tried to) move on.
You placed a new stick in between your lips. He saw your movement, and before you could take out your lighter, he straightened his posture in front of you and held your shoulders in place. He got closer again, eyes focusing on the sticks in between the two of you, igniting your cigarette with his. For that brief moment, you stared into his eyes again. Fuck. There you go, all smothered for him again. This was the exact reason you two could last so long, close to 2 years long; authentic, real romance most relationships could not achieve for very long. 
He snickered at your reaction, which got him a smack on his shoulder that made him retract a few steps back in return. 
“Fuck was that Yeonjun.” 
“Finally you dropped my last name,” he mentioned, as he hates when close friends, especially his own partner, calls him by his full name, as it is too ‘formal’, and not friendly at all. 
You decided to sit down on the ground instead, and he followed suit. 
“Whatever, Choi Yeonjun.” 
“Hey.. thought you dropped it,” he pouted and tried acting cute. 
You didn’t give a response but an inhale of your stick which you rather much focus on. A few brief seconds of silence, he spoke again. 
“Remember during freshman year, we would text each other to sneak out and smoke during class?” 
That sentence itself made you reminisce about those old times, and elicited a chuckle as you stared at the ground. 
“Then you got caught by the class rep?” 
“Yeah then I got caught! I took a bullet for us, baby."
He chuckled. There it was, your favourite smile appearing again. God, you miss it so damn much.
He was right, he has actually taken multiple bullets for your relationship, like he said; getting caught leaving class for reasons that your professor wouldn’t approve because he thinks of his students as if they were still young and naive even though everyone is well of age (seriously, who appoints a class rep in universities these days?). He even skipped his dance club meetings and trainings  just to come down to see you, or accompany you while you wait for your next class to start, no matter if it was just 30 minutes. 
However, at the end of the second semester, the two of you started to become extremely busy. One preparing for a dance competition and one practicing business presentations respectively. Ultimately, an argument just had to rise and break the relationship; over the fact that you two lacked communication and did not trust each other to be in the hands of another in replacement. Could you blame Beomgyu, Yeonjun’s dance partner for always spending time together? Or was it okay for him to point the blame on Soobin, your senior best friend who has been helping big time in preparing for your presentations?
But in truth, he was so agitated and pressured by his competition that he decided to blow smoke on you, blaming you for spending too much time with Soobin and that he was jealous. You were stressed too, and took things too emotionally. It was a typical relationship issue you thought you could talk things through for, but he did not have the same idea. Alas, it was the beginning of your downfall. 
A few weeks after the breakup, he came back, haunting you and your friends like a spirit with unfinished business, begging to be brought back in once more and that he was at fault. The first and second time he begged you, you couldn’t even look into his eyes because you were so disappointed in him and yourself that you just walked away without responding. The third and fourth time he tried approaching you, he brought you letters and flowers that were placed on the usual spot you always sit in the lecture theatre for general studies class, which was once next to your beloved boyfriend (but now, Soobin takes that spot). He stopped doing so after seeing his flowers in the bin right outside the class. 
Those times made you think, he really still loves you, and in truth, you still love him too, no matter how many times you tried denying it, by going to clubs with friends almost every week, and them telling you he isn’t worth it. You couldn't look him in the eye because you were scared of accepting this bittersweet truth. You threw the flowers because you didn't want your mother to be asking if Yeonjun gave you those and then ask a string of questions relating to your relationship and the boy, which makes her sound like she was more curious about your relationship with him than her own daughter’s wellbeing. All in all, you still hope he tries again, but with a better approach and at a better timing. 
The fifth and last time. It was unexpected and accidental. The both of you didn’t watch where you were walking towards, and bumped shoulders hard enough to receive pain from it. After realising it was you who he bumped into, he told his friends to go without him, and you said the same to your own group. The conversation began, and from there it travelled back to the present. 
 is this perhaps the better approach at a better timing? 
Your cigarette stick was slowly becoming shorter, so was his. Silence that was so uncomfortable fell in between the two of you.
“...I see you’re still wearing my hoodie. Does it still smell like me?” 
Ah, right. You forgot about what you were wearing till he mentioned it. The grey oversized hoodie that he loved so much, he decided to give it to you before things got hectic, knowing you will miss him a hell lot when you two got very busy. You have been wearing it out of habit actually, but you didn’t really care because all hope was lost, so it was about time you lost his scent and made it yours. 
“No, it smells like cigarettes now.” 
“Hey, it was my favourite hoodie though! Should I bring back my scent that you love so much-”
“Stop, I don’t want to. I wear it out of habit. And for smoking.” 
Yeonjun slowly retracted back his arms that were almost hugging your figure, wanting to hold you again once more, after the drought of not hugging someone that is as precious and adorable as you. He understood that you needed space, but that sentence did break his heart even more. 
“...I’ll hear you out again once more. Properly. And I'll think about it this time," you mentioned your final choice to listen to his reasonings and explanations behind his never-ending fight to win you back.
In that split second his heart was mended instantly, and his lips stretched into a small smile, happy that the boy had finally gotten a small victory. He turned his whole body to you, and began speaking his truth. 
“I admit I was at fault, the one who started the fight and initiated the break up. I know I messed up, big time. I won’t even blame the dance competition, or Soobin. Just myself. I was stupid enough to make that move out of the blue, especially when you were stressed about your presentations. I am terribly sorry for what I have done, and I promise you that when we have arguments again, I will never, ever do that again. You have been the best I ever had in my life, and I don’t want to be with anyone else, just you. I want to settle down with you and only you! I even thought about how many kids we should have and what kind of house we should-” 
“Woah damn. Slow down? How did an apology get to a proposal?” 
You giggled at his speech that sounded like he was going to get down on one knee to propose to you. He reacted the same as well, but for a different reason, when he saw you finally smiling because of him. 
“Okay okay. Take your time though, I can wait all day for your response.” 
“Really? Okay, I can go back to class and get back to you tonight then?” You joked, trying to get up from your spot while he tried to pull you back down. “Hey no i didn’t mean that!” 
“I’m just joking, jjunie."
His heart fluttered at the mention of the nickname, that was specially made by you. No one else can call him that.
You decided to respond after sighing. 
“Honestly? I feel the same. I too feel incomplete without you. Ever since we broke up, I couldn’t move on, and it felt wrong to do so. It was as if the universe didn’t allow me to. Do I resent you for that? Yes. Are you at fault? Obviously. But one thing I know for sure, that you regret it. From constantly begging me, to sending me letters and flowers, it was stupid, but it kind of reassured me to know that I wasn’t feeling stupid, alone.” 
You looked at him after speaking, and he has been staring at you with glossy eyes, arms wrapped around his knees. You smiled genuinely towards him. 
“My mother still asks about you too, you know? Asking when you are coming back to visit her again,” 
With that sentence, tears fell from his eyes, he didn’t even put in the effort to wipe it off. His smile became crooked as his sobbing became harder. You felt bad, you hate to see your favourite person cry. You gave in, and gave Yeonjun a comforting hug, wrapping your warm arms around him, cooing and patting him like a little child. 
“I’m sorry… I really am.” 
“It’s okay. Me too.” 
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4wkjun · 4 months
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slow down
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WARNINGS: mention of alcohol, unprotected sex (use protection!), overstimulation, using of sex toys, oral sex (f!receiving), swearing, slight rough sex (clit slapping), creampie.
"tell me what it is you wanna know", yeonjun asked when he realized you were staring at him.
you had a couple of drinks and the loud music was confusing your thoughts, but all you could possibly think about was kissing your boyfriend until your lips fell off.
"i want you", you mumbled. yeonjun smiled and brought you closer to him by passing his arm over your shoulders.
"finish up the bottle then we'll go, babe", he whispered on your ear, pointing to your beer sitting on the table.
his tone made you feel hot, pressing your thighs together. you grabbed your bottle and chugged a good amount, desperate to leave that party.
"won't you have a little?", you asked yeonjun. he chuckled, seeing the redness because of the alcohol over your cheeks.
"no way."
it took you less than two minutes to actually finish the bottle. you got up and yeonjun excused the both of you, saying you weren't feeling good and needed to leave.
"jjun", you whined walking down the empty parking lot. "can't we do it in the car?"
he laughed, opening the passenger's door for you.
"i'm too phased", he groaned. "however, i still want to take my time with you, princess."
you pouted as he kissed your forehead. you got in the car, uncomfortable because of your wet panties.
"did you take something?", yeonjun asked as soon as he got inside of the car, laughing.
"what?"
"i don't know. why are you so turned on?"
"because of you", you said, looking at him with lust eyes. "gosh, i want you so bad", you whined, pressing your thighs together.
yeonjun felt his underwear tightened. he always pictured you sucking him while he drove, but tonight he wanted things to be about you. as he entered the highway, he laid his hand on your thigh.
"can't we pull over?", you whispered on his ear, leaning in to palm his cock over his jeans. "i'm so down if you're ready."
"sorry love, i'm planning on taking things real slow with you back home", he groaned. you squeezed his cock, whining at the feeling of him getting harder under your touch. "stop it, baby. we'll be home in five minutes, i'll make it up to you, hm?", he said, taking your hand off him.
you whined, leaning against your seat again. you couldn't stop about yeonjun pulling over right there to fuck you raw in the backseat. you could picture the windows getting foggy and the messy sounds of his cock entering your dripping cunt.
neither of you said anything during the drive home. as yeonjun pulled the car in the driveway, he looked at you with dark eyes.
"get inside, love. i'll take care of you."
you obeyed, rushing to the inside. yeonjun chuckled, locking the car and getting inside as calm as he could. he knew you were desperate for his cock, so he decided to torture you a little bit.
yeonjun found you in the bedroom, taking your shirt off. he scoffed.
"aw, why are you rushing things up? i thought i would have the honor to undress you as i wish", he said, his body slowly approaching yours.
you moaned as his lips found the soft skin of your neck. your fingertips pulled on his soft hair, making him groan against your skin.
"jjun, i need you", you whined again. "don't you need me?", you asked, you left hand hovering his hard dick.
"i'll show you if you let me", he groaned. his hands guided you as he walked towards the bed, pushing you in the middle of it.
yeonjun kissed your chest as his hands found the zipper of your jeans, pulling it down. his lips left a trace on your skin as he kissed your upper stomach, not even close to your still clothed tits. everytime he moved an inch, his eyes kept looking for yours, eager to see how you reacted to his touch. your chest was moving fast and your head felt heavy, just like yeonjun expected you to be.
as he pulled your jeans and your panties down, he smiled. you were completely wet, he could simply slip his cock into you and fuck you restlessly at that exact moment. however, he started to kiss your lower belly, right above your pussy.
"jjun, you don't have to", you said softly, trying to pull his head. he grabbed your hands, pinning them down on the mattress.
"coming down is all i ever do, babe", he smirked. still holding onto your hand and looking at your face, he laid his tongue flat on your clit. your breath got caught in your throat at the contact, your pussy involuntarily clenching.
yeonjun sucked and licked your clit like he never did. or maybe everything felt so intense because of the alcohol running in your veins, but it didn't matter since you were over the clouds in no time.
throwing your head back, you moaned loudly, not caring about the time or about the neighbors who may hear you. you let go of his hand and grabbed his hair, slightly pushing his head against your cunt. since you let go of his hands, he decided it would be a good idea to finger you.
after three years of relationship, yeonjun knew your body way too well. he knew how to make you cum in no time, so that's what he did. he curved his fingers over your sweet spot and started to stimulate it along with the oral. in literally fifteen seconds, you orgasm washed over you. he didn't even care about your grip on his hair or how loud you were - actually, he liked to know he could make your lose your cool -, he could only think of how much he wanted to fuck you.
as soon as you rode your high, yeonjun got up, licking his fingers in front of you. he smirked when he realized you were already a mess over the bed. he slowly undressed, knowing your eyes were following his moves.
"jjunnie, can i suck your cock?", you asked, your mouth watering at the sight of his hard dick hitting his stomach.
he hissed at your words. "i'm sorry, love. tonight is about you",
"crawl a little further on the bed, babe", he said, pumping his cock. you did, eager for him to finally fuck you. stroking his own cock, yeonjun opened your last drawer and grabbed your hitachi.
"what are you doing?", you asked, still a little short of breath.
"shh, i'm about to show you, baby. slow down", he answered, plugging your vibrator on the outlet.
you whined when you realized yeonjun was about to fuck you raw. but instead of getting his dick inside of you at once, he slid his cock over your pussy over and over again. you squirmed, your clit swollen from your previous orgasm.
"please, jjun", you moaned. "fuck me like i'm famous."
he chuckled. "as you wish, princess."
before you could say anything else, yeonjun slid his tip inside of you. he did it so slowly it was torturing for the both of you.
you grabbed the sheets everytime he moved inside of you. as he got balls deep, you felt him on your cervix.
"fuck, jjun", you moaned loud.
yeonjun smirked, getting himself out of you as slow as he got in. "you're so loud, my love", he say, picking the pace a little. "do you want all of the neighbors to know how much of a slut you are?", he asked, slapping your clit as he was fully in again.
you moaned even louder, head thrown back and toes curling. you shook your head, suddenly uncapable of speaking.
"hm, y/n? tell me, do you want everyone to know how much of a mess you are with your pussy full?", he slapped your clit again.
you could feel your second orgasm building up as he kept fucking you ridiculously slow while slapping your sensitive clit. you clenched hard around him, holding your breath.
"cat got your tongue?", he groaned, slapping your clit continuously.
it got unbearable, so you ended up cumming over him without a warning. yeonjun kept sliding in and out of you at an agonizing pace while overstimulating your clit.
"jjun, i can't", you said when his slapping turned into rubbing. he started to fuck you a little faster than he was, but still not how you wanted in the first place.
"oh, you can, baby. cum for me again, slut", he groaned, his tip hitting your cervix non-stop and his fingers caressing your super sensitive bud.
just like that, your third orgasm hit you. you couldn't help but to moan loud once again and try to hold his hand so he would stop. when he realized how bad your legs were shaking, he stopped rubbing your clit.
you finally took a deep breath, but whined right after when he gave you a particularly hard thrust. his thrusts became slow again, but harder then they were. with your eyes closed, you heard the buzzing noise from your vibrator.
"jjun, i can't", you whined, looking at him. yeonjun smirked, shaking his head.
"just one more, love", he whispered as he placed the vibrator on your clit.
you barely left a scream out when you felt the vibration over your clit. it was way too much for you, you started to drool with your eyes closed and frowned eyebrows. you tried to relax your pussy so you wouldn't cum again, but yeonjun started to fuck you as fast as he could - this time, searching for his own orgasm.
you held his arm, your whole body shaking. he leaned into you, pressing the vibrator with the weight of his own torso against you.
with a literal growl, yeonjun came when you clenched around his cock. feeling his warm seed inside of you, your fourth orgasm washed over you.
he slowly got off you when he finished riding his high, sighing at the sight of your pussy dripping his cum. he collected his sperm with his fingertips and fucked it back into your cunt, smiling at your squirms.
"you take my cum so well", he pleased, leaning over to kiss your cheeks. you didn't realize you actually cried a little until yeonjun used his thumb to wipe the tears off your face. he kissed your lips ever so softly, caressing your cheek. "you good?"
you nodded, lightheaded. he chuckled, kissing your cheek.
"come on, i'll give you a nice bath", he said softly.
"i can't take it anymore", you whined.
yeonjun laughed out loud, shaking his head.
"i actually ment a bath. come on, you'll relax and then we'll go to sleep", he explained, pecking your lips again. "let me take care of you, hm?"
you nodded. yeonjun took you to the bathroom in the bridal style. even though he said he would just help you to get clean, you got out of the bathroom a long time after, feeling more sore and dirty than when you got in the first place.
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jungwnies · 2 years
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wanting a baby — TXT headcanon
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synopsis ― pranking txt saying "i want a baby" pairing ― fem!reader x tomorrow by together
warnings ― suggestive content + pregnancy requested ― yes, tysm anon for this request; it was really cute and fun to write >.< word count ― to be determined
― remember to like + reblog ― if you enjoyed please follow ― my request box is OPEN
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YEONJUN ―
"baby" your hand wraps around yeonjun's arm as you lean your head against his shoulder
"hm?" he says putting his arm around you as he made himself comfortable on the couch
you look up him, a sight easy on the eyes, "i want a baby."
yeonjun sits up straight and sits you up properly, his hands are on your shoulders now and he looks you dead in the eyes, "you're joking."
you shake your head, giving him the most serious look you could ever give him, "wouldn't it be so cute to have a little mini me or a mini yeonjun running around?"
yeonjun picks you up quickly throwing you over his shoulder, "babe where are you taking me."
"i'm taking you to a place where i can fuck a baby into you." he says walking towards the bedroom.
you bust out laughing and squirming trying to get out of his tight hold, "baby i was just jokinggg" you tell him still fighting his grip.
"then we can practice for the day you actually want a baby," he says throwing you onto the bed.
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SOOBIN ―
"binnie, look at this video." you scoot over to your boyfriend and show him the baby video on your phone.
soobin giggles laughing at the small figure on your phone, and you look at him in adoration, "love, i want a baby."
soobin stops his giggles and looks at you, "what?"
"a baby, like a mini me or you running around, wouldn't a baby be so cute?" you say pushing the phone closer to his eyes
soobin laughs, "aren't we too young for a baby, and we're not even married, and i just want to make sure you're really ready for one, i just-" you cut him off halfway through his rant and place a kiss on his lips.
"i was just joking baby" you laugh putting your phone down to hold his hand.
"you made me panic" soobin pouts placing his face into the crook on your neck, he places a soft kiss on your shoulder.
you laugh and put your hand on his back, "you're already as high maintenance as a baby soob." you joke.
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BEOMGYU ―
you and beomgyu sat on the couch comfortably watching tik-toks
with a little scrolling it wasn't long until you came across the infamous baby videos
"babe, aren't babies so cute?" you say as you watch the babies on your screen.
gyu looks at you with a disgusted face, "no." he jokes before laughing
you smack your boyfriend in the arm softly, "shut up, they're cute."
gyu continues to laugh before placing a kiss on your forehead, "not as cute as you."
a blush spreads across your face, "gyu i want a baby." you say as you put the phone down on your lap
beomgyu looks at you with an eyebrow raised and a slightly weirded out face, "don't you think we're too young?"
"age is just a number."
beomgyu laughs before calming himself down, "let's get married first, but we can always practice how to make a baby."
he leans into you placing a kiss on your lips, his arm snaking around to place his hand on the small of your back.
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TAEHYUN ―
it was all just innocent netflix watching before a cute baby popped up in the scene, “awww tyun look at the baby it reminds me of you”
tyun looks at you in concern, “how does that thing remind you of me?”
you laugh, “you’re like a baby sometimes” you say to the boy before pulling him into your tight grasp smothering him in kisses
tyun tries to escape your kisses but ultimately fails, “maybe we should have a baby” you say pausing the show.
taehyun looks at you shocked, “i’m not enough?”
“but wouldn’t a mini tyun or mini me be cute?” you tell him with big puppy eyes.
“maybe in a few years, we’re twentyyyy”
“i guess you’ll do for now.” you say before smothering him in your kisses once again basically tackling him on the couch where you once sat comfortably
eventually he broke out of your grasp and tackled you playfully, “i love you so much.”
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HUENING KAI ―
“hyuka you’re baby pictures are so cute” you told him as you scrolled through the big photo book
huening kai gives you a small laugh and points at one of the pictures, “i was like 3 years old here.”
you flipped through the book and looked at each page in complete adoration
“it makes me want a baby.” you say as you close the book fully, “it would be so cute to have a mini kai running around the house.”
kai looks at you with a slight blush on his face, “i can be your baby.” as he does some aegyo
you playfully hit his arm, “you’re getting old, i can see the gray in your hair already.”
kai laughs before pulling you into his tight hood, “arent my plushies enough?”
you laugh, “babe, a baby, A BABY.” you say pinching his cheek
dramatically he fakes cries, “but i want to be the only one deserving of your love.”
you plant a kiss on his lips before pulling away, “i’ll always love you.”
“maybe i’ll forgive you for breaking my heart in exchange for another one of those kisses.” he says pointing at his lips
you tackle him onto the ground smothering him with kisses before pulling away, “we can have a baby once my hair falls out.” he says as you put the baby albums away
“it’s already falling out with the amount of dyeing you’re doing to it.” you joke
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© 2022 JUNTHUSIAST ― all rights reserved ― do not copy, steal, or repost any of my works + translations need PERMISSION
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tokkibbang00 · 10 months
Text
WHY CAN'T WE BE FRIENDS? - C.YEONJUN (MASTERLIST)
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MINORS AND AGELESS BLOGS, DO NOT INTERACT. UNEDITED.
synopsis: Being caught in a series of scandals and controversies, Yeonjun's company has had enough of his attitude problems and finally decides to send him off to university. Despite his arguments towards management, he has no choice but to follow them or else he can kiss his modelling career goodbye. You're a fashion major attending university. You'd think you'd be delighted hearing about the news of a famous model coming into your department, but as soon as you were seated beside him in one of your classes, you'd soon come to realize that you absolutely hated his guts.
rating: (n)sfw
pairing: model!choi yeonjun x fashion major!afab reader
genre: college!au, enemies to lovers!au, kinda angsty, reader and yeonjun are idiots.
warnings: cursing, yeonjun's kind of an asshole at first, mentions of alcohol, suggestive, (will add more when the full story is posted)
date started: 05-20-23 date ended: -
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TEASER.
...
...
...
tba.
story notes
playlist
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NOTE: Characters presented do not represent anyone mentioned in the story. This is a work of fiction and is not real.
a/n: this was originally planned to be a one-shot but i thought about it and it probably wouldn't make sense if it's just a one-shot. so here we go!! taglist for the story is open, just message me or slide in my asks! my requests are also open :]]
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TAGLIST: @captivq @i-dont-give-a-fok @nxtsnw @suzirumas @emohazuzworld @hyusun @hyukablush @myahfig4 @missseoulite
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hrtsgyu · 8 months
Text
star gazing with yeonjun
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“c’mon hurry up!” yeonjun whispers loudly while reaching out for your hand “i’m coming geez” you start speed walking to catch his hand. after you caught it he pulls you into his arms “i’m gonna carry you” he whispers into your ear “wait wha-!” he picks you up, bridal style “oh my god yeonjun! let me down!” “hold onto me we’re almost there!” you hold onto his neck as he starts running to the special spot he’s been telling you about all week. it was a pretty far walk from where you both live. “okay.. okay! we’re here” he smiles brightly at you “please let me down” he kisses your forehead before putting you down “you’re too cute y/n you make my heart hurt” he puts both his hands on his heart “oh shut up jun” you smile a little as he places the blanket on the grass and pulls you down with him by surprise. “close your eyes” he says eagerly, although he’s behind you, you can tell. “what?” and he puts his hands over your eyes. “when i take my hands off you have to look at the sky, it’s almost as beautiful as you” you blush a little “okayy i got it” he takes his hands off of your eyes and as you look up you feel his hands creep around your waist and he places his head on your shoulder. “woah it’s so beautiful” you whisper to him “told you” you swear you can feel him smile. he pulls you closer and starts kissing on your neck. “alright calm down lover boy we’re still in public” he pulls off and whispers in your ear “no one’s here baby” he kisses your jawline. “cameras exist jun.” he sighs against you “damn you really got me there” you giggle as you turn to face him. “how’d you even find out about this place?” “beomgyu told me about it” you nod a little when he replied. he pulled you back into his lap and gave you a peck “i like you by the way” he kisses you again. “really? cuz the kisses weren’t giving it away” you gave him a sarcastic confused face and he shoots you a deadpan look “i like you too jun” he smirks a little before saying “okay but can we At Least make out?” you start kissing him to give him his answer. he stops you for a little “this is why i love you” he turns you over so you’re on your back and he’s on top of you. “yeonjun! the amazing stars remember?” trying to get his attention off you “i’m gonna make you feel like a star tonight”
i’ll leave the rest up to your imagination:3
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hai !!!! did you guys like this ? i’m honestly thinking about maybe a STORY STORY like not just drabbles but idk what to write abt Hmmm thank you so much for da lov on the other two beomgyu posts! i feel like he’s so fun to write about. his calm and safe nature idk man i just love beomgyu fr </3 anyways thanks once again for reading moa ^_−☆
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pinktyuns · 11 months
Text
out & about featuring choi yeonjun
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“yeonjun oh my god you’re gonna kill me!!” you clutched your side, out of pain and laughter, as yeonjun just laughed and continued pulling you down the street by your hand, not worried at all about the crazed looks the pair of you were getting as you ran down the busy street.
“you’re no fun y/n!” he laughed again, looking at you over his shoulder with a huge smile.
as you made eye contact with your boyfriend you felt like you had the wind knocked out of you, and not because of the running.
something you never think you would be able to get used to was how beautiful yeonjun was, in every single situation. he was beautiful waking up in the morning, he was so beautiful on stage, and he was beautiful now, running down the street with you with happy laughter trailing behind you guys.
the black beanie covering his messy brown hair was pulled low, covering his ears, but his eyes sparkled at you like they held the stars in them. his perfect pout upturned in a gorgeous, toothy smile, just happiness shown on his face.
“jun, i just don’t get why we have to run!” you breathed, trying to keep up with your boyfriend whose legs were much, much longer.
he laughed again, “we don’t want anyone to recognize me!”
you couldn’t help but roll your eyes, “wouldn’t it make more sense if you were recognized for being a crazy person running down the street?!”
you could see yeonjun stop and consider this, seeing the cogs turn in his brain before he breathed a small, “oh shit, yea.”
you giggled at him as you guys finally stopped running, thank god. yeonjun not letting go of your hand and falling in stride next to you as you caught your breath.
looking up at him, you wondered how in the hell was he not tired at all, when you decided to take a minute to admire your boyfriend.
the sky was a gorgeous bright cobalt blue, the sun had set already but it had left the sky still bright and beautiful. it outlined yeonjuns body, lighting up his perfect side profile, it was just so insane that someone that beautiful could just be here on this street, walking on the earth.
yeonjun, turning down to look at you, made your heart thump as you remembered that you were right here next to him, getting to experience life and love with this gorgeous man. nothing was ever normal with him, and you both loved that.
it was moments like this, running down foreign streets, sleeping on each other during 14-hour long plane rides, sneaking kisses backstage before he would preform, loud, happy game nights with the members with you tucked into yeonjuns side, moments like this were the ones that made you the happiest.
you both stopped in the street, on what seemed like a bridge, yeonjun tucking you into his side, his arm wrapped around your shoulder as you leaned into him, his everlasting warmth.
you looked up at the big beautiful blue sky again, “the sky is so pretty.”
but yeonjun, as always, was only looking at you, “you’re prettier.”
you scrunched your nose, butterflies starting up in your stomach, turning to look up at your smiling boyfriend, “that’s cheesy, choi.”
he smiled, eyes crinkling, “you make me cheesy.”
you rolled your eyes at that, snuggling deeper into yeonjuns embrace, sighing out of contentment.
yeonjun leaned down to press a soft, loving kiss onto your forehead, pulling away and whispering softly, “this is so special to me you know. you’re so special to me.”
warmth spread across your whole body as you smiled, pushing onto your toes to press a kiss back onto yeonjuns cheek, leaving him smiling stupidly, “everything with you is special to me, choi.”
he smiled the prettiest smile, pulling you even closer, resting his chin on top of your head, looking up at that big beautiful sky, that matched your big beautiful feelings for each other.
( instagram user yawnzzn strikes and kills me again oh my lord. i rlly think yeonjun needs to consider my mental health before he posts. cute lil drabble for a cute lil yawnzzn post <3 hope u liked it )
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boigyu · 11 months
Note
I don't know if you take requests but would you write a older brother Yeonjun type thingy? :> I don't know. He seems like the type to be an older brother or maybe it just the fact that he's the eldest
YEONJUN AS YOUR OLDER BROTHER 🫶
genre! siblings, crack, fluff
warnings! cursing, mentions of drinking, reader is female
note! SO SORRY THIS TOOK SO LONG, I was a little stuck tbh 😭 don't even know if you were talking about texts but I'm currently not writing written works 😓😓 anyways, I honestly think he would be such a great big brother cuz he has always wanted a younger sibling so u would be very protected by him ik that. for the family chat, it's based off of my experiences tbh cuz my parents always send random old baby pics of me and my brother, it's funny LMAOO
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@ boigyu 2023. don't plagiarize, steal or translate my work
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beom1e · 1 year
Text
twenty four
everything about yeonjun was infuriating to you. the way he assumed he had the right to toss other women aside simply because he was arranged to marry you, the way he didn’t care for the kingdom he was going to one day rule, and most importantly, the way he didn’t love you the way that you loved him.
pairing choi yeonjun x fem! reader
genre drama, angst, fluff, enemies to lovers, royal au, prince! yeonjun, princess! reader, set in the past (unspecified)
warnings misuse of alcohol, mature discussions, minor injuries, minor violence, a horse dies, large amounts of blood, weapons (daggers and arrows), cursing, slight misogyny, gets a bit heated but not too far, mentions of death
masterlist | next
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it was funny how alcohol could change so much. everybody shows their true colours, even if they don’t want to. people cheat, love is drunkenly expressed, confidence is boosted, awful confessions are spilled, mistakes are made. you had once vowed to never let your true colours show, no matter what. it would be more harm done than good. nevertheless, you couldn’t resist an invitation to drink.
just you and the other girls in flowing nightgowns, laughter filling the room. you would sing and dance and knock empty bottles to ground as you clumsily navigated your bedroom on a loop. gossip and the never-ending ‘who is doing who’ updates would be exchanged, your favourite aspect of the night. and much like your present, all of this would be a result of a mandatory ball or dining experience. the need to free yourselves from those obligations always ended in drinking until you passed out, and you wouldn’t have it any other way.
the forced smile on your lips faltered for a moment as the boy standing before you looked you up and down. if it weren’t for the required formalities, you would have taken your hand out of his own and used it to shove him far away from yourself. as a princess, though, that was merely a fantasy. you could only dream of breaking character in a room full of watchful eyes.
your father was the king, or at least one of them. the land was split into two separate kingdoms thousands of years ago, as the two families totally despised each other. in a sense, you were the juliet of the story. your mother was forever searching for peace, and convinced your father to make a deal with the rival kingdom. that deal involved you and the other family’s son, choi yeonjun. you were to be married, and the two kingdom’s would be united into one. everybody was sick of war, and you were roped into their need for peace before you had even been born. now you were the queen-to-be, and had a reputation to uphold as their peace-loving princess.
you actually hated peace. you loved bad habits, both alcohol and boys. being queen was something you dreaded, and mostly because it meant being married off to a man who couldn’t care less about you if he tried.
yeonjun was quite like you. he loved socialising in rebellious ways, although he always got away with it. to the adults, he was a prince hard at work in preparation for his throne. to your generation, he was the biggest heartbreaker of both kingdoms combined. it didn’t taint his image, in fact it only made him more desirable. a king who valued fun and freedom over ridiculous activities such as hunting and fencing, and one who everyone on the land had a chance to sleep with. watching girl after girl sob and splutter about how yeonjun broke her heart at your secret, drunken parties always gave you a sickly feeling. how could a man be so cruel? and how come you were the only woman he wasn’t interested in?
‘would you excuse us?’ yeonjun spoke. talk of the devil and he will arrive. ‘i’d like to have a word with my betrothed.’
right, this was your engagement party.
‘of course,’ the man dropped your hand, and you smiled politely before following behind yeonjun.
‘i’m not a damsel in distress,’ you reminded. ‘i don’t need you to step in every time a man so much as looks in my direction.’
‘that man was eyeing you as if you were a bag of gold,’ yeonjun stopped and turned to face you. of course, he had to do this in the middle of the ballroom. ‘he has no status, so he’s not worth tainting your image over. a queen shouldn’t be seen mingling with commoners when she’s engaged to be wed.’
‘i was making polite conversation,’ you raised your voice slightly, before catching yourself and taking a deep breath. ‘i had no intention to sleep with him. i’m not you, i don’t just take every living, breathing thing home with me.’
‘i’m friends with enough of your previous lovers to know that’s a lie, y/n,’ he held out his hand to you, bowing slightly. ‘now, may i have this dance?’
‘absolutely not,’ you scoffed, but raised your eyes to see that everybody had turned to watch you. another forced smile made its way onto your lips and you took his hand. ‘just know i’m doing this for the kingdoms, and not you.’
‘that’s my girl,’ he flirted, pulling you in closer as the band began to play a slower song. ‘now look pretty and dance for the sake of our parents.’
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the laughter didn’t seem to stop. you fell back against your bed, still giggling to yourself as your best friend hid her face out of embarrassment.
‘your turn, y/n,’ another girl spoke, running across the room to deliver a freshly opened bottle of mead to you. ‘we’ve been waiting on a story about how it is to be yeonjun’s girl.’
‘well, i am definitely not yeonjun’s girl,’ you pulled yourself to sit up. ‘although, he did refer to me as such at our engagement party. still, it’s only for show. we don’t share a bedroom, we’ve never kissed, i would rather eat coal than hold his hand, and he’s already slept with half of the women in this room. the most i can say is that he’s a swell dance partner.’
‘well, i can say so too,’ another girl spoke, sending everybody into another fit of laughter. ‘and of course, i mean outside of the ballroom.’
‘yes, yes, we all got it the first time,’ your best friend looked at you with pity in her eyes. ‘i think it’s time we left y/n to sleep, she has a big day ahead of her.’
after the room was cleared of drunken girls, you locked your bedroom door and hit your head against it a few times. hiding your jealously behind humour had became a very bad habit of yours, but it was the only way you could cope. you were being forced to marry the boy you had been in love with for your entire life, and he just didn’t feel the same. it was cruel and torturous, and yet only one other person in the world knew just how much it pained you to hear of his recent hookups.
it took mere seconds for the alcohol to knock you out, but it was only a few hours later that you were being forced out of bed again. a loud knock echoed throughout the room before the door was shoved open and yeonjun stepped inside.
you gasped, sitting up and using your silk sheets to cover your almost-bare body. the only thought running through your mind was that you were sure you had locked the door, and that only palace staff had access to the key. the words were about to leave your lips before yeonjun interjected.
‘i asked for permission to wake you up this morning,’ he smirked, closing the door behind himself. ‘from your father, and from the staff. i wanted to get a feel for what i’d be getting in the morning for the rest of my existence. so far, i’m not totally appalled by you. considering the fact that you’re hardly covering yourself with those sheets, especially.’
the sound you let out in response was a mixture of a growl and a gasp. you gripped the sheets harder and tried to shuffle further into them, while yeonjun stood there looking amused.
‘get out,’ you ordered, glaring up at him. ‘we’re not yet married so you have no right coming in here without my explicit permission. my father’s permission is not enough.’
‘i only came to deliver you a hangover cure,’ he brought his hands out in front of him and presented you with an old glass bottle filled with a brown liquid. ‘the kitchen recently received the recipe for coca-cola, so i asked them for a sample.’
‘just leave it by my dressing table and get out,’ you avoided his eyes, waiting for his next move. he simply raised a brow and tilted his head. ‘thank you, yeonjun.’
‘you’re welcome, y/n,’ he smiled, crossing over the room to place down the bottle. you watched his every move like a hawk. ‘and breakfast is in an hour.’
then he was gone. the door closed behind him and you did what could only be described as a child throwing a tantrum over having to do something they didn’t want to. but there was no choice about it, obviously. the servants would arrive shortly to dress you, and then you’d be carted off to village after village in search of peace.
you slipped out of bed onto the hardwood floor and hurried towards the bottle. the throbbing headache was kicking in, and you had all the hope that this would work.
‘your highness?’ a woman’s voice called, causing you to run back towards your bed and gulp down as much of the drink as you could. ‘are you awake?’
‘yes,’ you breathed out. ‘could you give me one moment just to bathe myself alone?’
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yeonjun was flipping through an old book and producing different sounds based on how far he agreed with their views. you felt like throwing your knife across the long table and hitting him right between the eyes. of course, you had no choice but to put up with his annoying habit — although you’d bet he was simply putting it on in order to annoy you — whilst many servants surrounded the two of you.
the doors swung open and your father came towards you with purpose in his stride. you placed your cutlery down beside your plate and stood, assuming he’d ask to speak with you privately. that assumption was proven wrong when he began to speak in front of everybody.
‘a maid found an unregistered bottle beside your bed,’ he fumed, filling the room with his large voice. ‘you know the rules, y/n, and breaking them won’t do you any good when you’re queen. i won’t be able to step up and explain your mistakes, and i certainly don’t expect the prince to do so.’
‘it was me, sir,’ yeonjun stood. ‘i delivered the bottle to her early this morning, it was a new recipe i wanted to share.’
your father looked down the table and over at yeonjun, the anger in his expression slowly dissipating. you smiled down at your plate, mentally thanking him for saving you.
‘from now on, register every item that goes into and comes out of your rooms,’ he spoke in a softer tone. ‘when you’re married and crowned the new royals in charge, mistakes like this won’t pass. it only takes one servant for the word to be spread, and for your image to be ruined by the rumours.’
‘yes, father,’ you bowed your head. yeonjun stayed silent, but mirrored your actions.
‘the carriage is waiting outside,’ the king continued. ‘add some layers so you don’t freeze, and be friendly to the townsfolk who came to watch your departure.’
there were minutes of silence that followed. your father’s footsteps echoed throughout the room before the large, wooden doors creaked open and then slammed closed. servants began to whisper and yeonjun seated himself with a kind smile on his lips. it was all just for show.
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your mother buttoned your cape at the collar before grabbing your face and pressing a kiss to your forehead. you smiled sadly and made a silent promise between yourselves that you would keep yourself safe. only another woman would understand the dangers of travelling alone with a man, whether that man was involved with you or not.
‘the king and queen to be,’ you were introduced, followed by the doors opening and the sound of cheering filling the area. both you and yeonjun put on a smile and he offered his arm for you to hold onto as he led you down the stairs. children jumped with joy at the sight of your dress, and women fanned themselves at the sight of the man on your arm. if it weren’t for the audience, you’d be rolling your eyes already.
the carriage was cramped, as always. you never minded if it was just you and your own family members, but being forced to sit that close to yeonjun was going to make for an awful few weeks. on the seat, there was a basket of baked goods and clothing items for the villagers. you wanted to question how the next basket would be delivered, but you assumed your parents would have already thought of that.
yeonjun helped you inside and took a moment to wave everybody goodbye before he sat beside you. you scooted as far away from him as you possibly could and faced the wall.
‘we’re going to be sitting here beside each other for the next three hours,’ he reminded. ‘maybe i can offer something more interesting than the wall.’
‘i actually think the wall will offer much more intelligent conversation,’ you shot back. ‘i want a peaceful ride.’
‘sorry, your peaceful majesty,’ he mocked. ‘i had no idea you were such a genius.’
‘how dare you?’ your head whipped around to face him. ‘i would have loved to go to school. i would have loved to read and to learn, not be forced to practice crochet patterns and piano. do not mock a woman whose only purpose was to marry, because i can assure you it wasn’t my choice.’
‘i didn’t mean to offend,’ he sighed. ‘i’m sorry, truly.’
‘gosh, yeonjun,’ you scoffed in disbelief. ‘i can’t believe so many women want to sleep with you when you famously can’t go three minutes without displaying that you’re a misogynist.’
‘you think too little of me,’ he rolled his eyes. ‘i only meant to throw an insult back at you. i didn’t think about the context, only how i wanted to fight you back.’
‘this marriage will never work if you can’t respect me,’ you turned your head away. ‘i’m not asking you to love me or even to like me, but a bit of respect would be nice. i’m not a joke, i don’t need saving when another man approaches me. i have fought my own battles for my entire life, and i want you to respect that i’m my own person and not just your queen.’
‘i do respect you, y/n,’ yeonjun sighed. ‘we’ve always been this way. you take the first chance to insult me and i take a jab back at you. just because we’re going to be married doesn’t mean we have to act all grown-up from now on.’
‘but i do,’ you met his gaze. ‘a queen has to be perfect. perfectly dressed, perfectly well-spoken, perfect manners, perfect attitude and a perfect reputation. a king merely has to fulfil his duties, and the rest is his business. he can have as many mistresses as he pleases, he can drink any day of the week at any time of the day, and nobody will blink an eye.’
‘and you think i’m going to cheat on you with every woman in the kingdom?’ he laughed. ‘drink myself to death? ruin the image my father created for our family?’
‘did you not invite one of my girls to your room last night?’ you raised a brow. ‘did you not grab a sample of coca-cola for yourself as well?’
‘no, i didn’t,’ something in his expression shifted. ‘i haven’t even looked at another woman since i proposed. this marriage is for show, so there’s no way i’m going to risk being caught being disloyal and ruin the whole illusion.’
‘you’ve gotten away with it for years,’ you clicked your tongue. ‘has all the secrecy and tiptoeing around finally gotten to you?’
‘you don’t know me, y/n,’ he frowned. ‘as much as you���d like to believe you do, you don’t. family comes first for me, and now that you’re part of my family, you come first. i don’t want to risk ruining you or us, so i’m doing the right thing. i’m sorry for spending my days of freedom doing the things i wanted before i would be inevitably made king of two kingdoms.’
‘freedom?’ you rolled your eyes. ‘and what freedom will you be losing as king? i, on the other hand, now belong to you. i belong to you. i’m your wife, i’ll mother your children, i’ll greet the townspeople everyday while you make all of the important decisions, and i’ll never get to experience love.’
‘oh, please,’ he dropped his head back against the seat, closing his eyes. ‘i’m done arguing with you.’
‘because you know i’m right and i’m winning,’ you had to get the last word in. ‘because you know everything i said to be true, and you can’t deny it.’
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the first thing you noticed was that it was muddy. yeonjun had dropped down from the carriage already and was holding a hand out to you, but you only stared at the ground and then back at your dress. he groaned and lifted you from the carriage into his arms, before placing you down on solid ground. the women audibly gasped and cooed at the sight.
‘thank you,’ you smiled. yeonjun left your side to reach for the basket, before placing it in your arms.
‘prince yeonjun, and princess y/n,’ the carriage driver introduced, bowing as he did so. the two of you smiled and bowed too, before the townspeople came excitedly towards you. yeonjun watched as you were practically swept off your feet and brought into the village.
the carriage was parked elsewhere. you handed out the food and clothing while yeonjun gave hefty donations to each of the market stalls. the children swarmed around you and tried to play, some of the girls reaching for your hand and asking for you to dance with them. it was a fun interaction complimented by the live band that played jolly music. for once, you enjoyed the obligation. the people loved you and were thankful for you, and that made you feel so good inside. becoming queen was something you definitely didn’t want to do, but you thought it’d be a little bit easier now that you were loved and respected by your people. well, they were currently yeonjun’s people as you were visiting around his kingdom.
‘i think the queen would like to rest now,’ a woman spoke, placing her hand on her daughter’s back to pull her away from the crowd. the rest of the children began to space out, and you looked at yeonjun for help. ‘i can take you.’
‘oh, thank you very much,’ you smiled at the woman, and began following her through the village. yeonjun caught up with you and offered his arm, you wrapped your own arm around his and held onto his bicep for support. the ground was very uneven, that was the only reason.
the sun was starting to set when you were left alone in the room you’d booked for the night. yeonjun began undressing, unclipping his cufflinks and unbuttoning his waistcoat. you choked out a sound of surprise and spun around.
‘what’s the matter, princess?’ he pried as he shrugged off the waistcoat and placed it on the bed. ‘do you want me to step outside to change and raise suspicion?’
‘you could have warned me,’ you huffed. ‘watching you strip wasn’t part of the deal.’
‘these people have to really believe we’re in love,’ he began with the excuses. ‘for all we know, they could be peeking through our window right this second. and i can guarantee they’ll all be listening out for some bed squeaking tonight.’
‘shut up, choi,’ you snapped. ‘you can’t manipulate me into sleeping with you ‘for the people’.’
‘you can’t keep using my surname against me,’ he joked. ‘it’ll be yours in a matter of months.’
‘stop,’ you were furious now. ‘you’re being mean. i’m having my name and my freedom stripped away from me by you, and you think it’s all fun and games because you get to be king. the reality will hit you hard when you figure out that ruling isn’t as easy as you think it is. and i’m not going to become your wife, i’ll be the queen who stands just as tall as you will.’
‘and how easy will that be for you?’ he pressed. ‘you hate responsibility. you love drinking until you pass out and sleeping with the men who fall at the knee in front of you as soon as they hear of your status. you’re no better than me, in fact you’ll be a worse queen than i’ll be king.’
‘if i’m no better, why do you think so highly of yourself?’ you argued, and yeonjun had already spun around to start unbuttoning his shirt. that pissed you off. you ripped out the bows in your hair and set them down, before undressing yourself down to your undergarments.
the bed was going to be yours. you stomped around and huffed as you picked up yeonjun’s neatly folded clothes and tossed them to the ground. he spun around in disbelief and his eyes widened at the sight of your barely-clad self. you got under the sheets and pulled them up over your head, leaving yeonjun half-dressed in the middle of the room. he sighed heavily and moved to blow out the lamps around the room.
‘i wish you would stop fighting me,’ he spoke softly. ‘i don’t want to spend the rest of my life fighting with you.’
the rest of his life. the rest of your life. you were going to be trapped in a marriage with no love and no affection. you’d never get to experience sleepy morning kisses or intimate nights, you wouldn’t be introduced to his friends at parties as the woman he loves, your children would never tell stories of how dearly their parents loved each other. he wouldn’t hold your hand or kiss you goodbye, he wouldn’t fix together a poorly made soup when you’re sick or hold you when you’re struggling. a loveless, cold marriage doomed for eternity.
‘excuse me,’ you rushed out of bed and through the room until you were pulling open the door and leaning against it from the other side. yeonjun took a seat at the foot of the bed and he felt his heart ache. both for you and for himself.
it was miserable. you’d never get to be happy, and neither would he. your lives were dedicated to reuniting two rival kingdoms and combining them into one. the whole point of your trip was to convince everyone of your love and help them adjust to the collaboration, not a romantic getaway to test your love. you lived to serve your parents and your people. it was either you spent everyday feeling hopeless and miserable or you sucked it up and learned to be happy in an environment not built for happiness.
you let the tears fall. it didn’t matter. you sobbed and wiped furiously at your eyes, your vision turning blurry after the amount of tears filling it.
‘why so glum, princess?’ a man’s voice, and you gasped. he placed his hand over your mouth and held your arms behind your back in an attempt to keep you quiet. ‘make a sound or scream and i’ll kill you.’
your mother had taught you what to do in this situation. he’ll kill you even if you’re quiet, so you need to kick and scream and cry for help. and when you’re free, go for the weak spots. eyes, nose, stomach, and you know where. you squirmed aggressively and freed your arms, reaching forward to grab his hand and rip it away from your mouth.
‘yeonjun!’ you cried, still flailing around in the man’s arms. he reached into his pocket and pulled out a dagger, holding it up to your throat as a warning.
‘i mean it, princess,’ he spat. ‘i was sent here to snatch you, dead or alive. your father’s stupid for trying to get us to join him, i know hundreds who won’t do it.’
‘that’s not her doing,’ yeonjun interrupted. ‘get your filthy hands off my fiancée.’
‘what are you going to do?’ the man snorted out a laugh. ‘i’ve raised chickens with more muscle than you’ve got.’
you took the distraction as a chance to elbow the man hard in the stomach. his dagger sliced across your arm as he dropped the ground, and you winced momentarily. yeonjun grabbed you but you pulled your arm back and placed your foot firmly on the man’s hand. he groaned while you reached down to slip the dagger out of his grasp. once again, yeonjun reached for you and pulled you back, but you only slipped out of his hold again and returned to the bedroom.
you grabbed your cape and fastened it over your shoulders when you heard more disturbance outside of the room. when you stepped outside, the man had grabbed yeonjun by the collar and was holding him against the wall. you looked around for a solution, and noticed a table holding a single lamp. you blew the flame out and tossed it aside, spilling wax all over the wooden floorboards. as you lifted the table, you thought that maybe the hot lamp would have been a better choice.
still, you lifted the small table above your head and used your strength to throw it towards the man. it hit him over the head, and yeonjun quickly ducked out of the way onto the ground. the man dropped silently to the ground and blood trickled out from the small wound in his head.
‘we should go,’ you breathed out, feeling the ache in your arms. not to mention the sting of the slice you’d endured from his dagger. ‘quickly before another shows up.’
‘thank you,’ he cleared his throat, his eyes full of worry. ‘y/n, you’re bleeding.’
‘don’t pity me,’ you rolled your eyes. ‘i don’t need your pity, and evidently i don’t need you to come and save me.’
‘why’d you call for me?’ that same smirk was on his lips again. the sight of it made your blood boil and your body tremble slightly with anger. ‘if you don’t need saving.’
‘you seriously need a reality check,’ your eyes narrowed. ‘i can’t wait for the day somebody finally ruins your confidence.’
the sound of a door slamming cut you off, yeonjun grabbed your uninjured arm and began dragging you down the unstable stairs. if it wasn’t for the current life or death situation, you would have fought him on his need to act a hero once again. instead, you just followed along.
outside of the inn, a few more men were waiting. yeonjun began to run, but when he noticed the arrows flying towards you, he shoved you aside and ordered you to hide. you caught yourself before you fell face first into the mud, and ran towards the stables. the bottom of your white slip dress was now dripping and drenched in mud, and you had smudges of blood ruining the upper half.
you looked for your family horse in the stables, a smile lighting up your features when you spotted her. in a struggle to unlock the gates, you noticed hurried footsteps approaching you. but much to your delight, it was only yeonjun catching up with you. no words were exchanged as he squeezed his way past you and opened the gate easily. the usual huff or groan that you’d respond with was nowhere to be found, you simply looked at him with thankful eyes as he guided your horse out.
‘you first,’ he ordered, holding a hand out for you. you nodded and climbed up onto the horse. you grabbed hold of the reins as yeonjun sat comfortably behind you. your breath hitched when you felt the warmth of his body surrounding yours, and his firm chest pressing against your back. ‘we’ll be best off going through the woods if we want to lose them.’
you nodded in agreement and pulled on the reins, sending your horse into a hurried run towards the thick woods. the men followed the sound of her hooves hitting the ground, still clutching onto their bows as arrows repeatedly zoomed past you. it was unnerving, the whipping sound of arrows and the thump as they pierced into trees all around you. yeonjun tightened his hold on you in order to calm your nerves. the woods were getting thicker and thicker, branches scratching against your bare skin and tears beginning to form.
‘i won’t let anything happen to you,’ yeonjun whispered beside your ear, but his voice was shaky and unsure. ‘i promise.’
the moment was ruined when your horse stopped and began to refuse to move. you held on tightly to the reins, despite her insisting on throwing you off.
‘over there!’ a man’s voice announced, followed by the sound of more arrows flying past.
the tears began to fall. the horse finally agreed to move, but the amount of arrows in motion was becoming dangerous. you could hardly see due to the speed, the darkness, the amount of greenery and now your tears.
‘let go of the reins, y/n,’ yeonjun wrapped his arms around you waist and pulled you flush against him. you shook your head, letting out a sob. ‘let go!’
it was an order now. the reins slipped from your grasp and yeonjun dragged you down the floor with him. you landed harshly on a mess of twigs and mud, but yeonjun took most of the fall. he coughed, having been winded. your horse began to throw a fit once again, before a pained sound that you’d never forget echoed throughout the trees.
‘no,’ you whimpered. ‘please, no!’
yeonjun couldn’t stop you. you picked yourself up and began to run towards your horse. her beautiful white fur began to turn red from the multiple injuries she sustained from the arrows. she laid motionless on her side, and you couldn’t hold back the sobbing and screaming. blood soaked through your dress and began to paint your hands and arms, and then your face when you tried to wipe away your tears.
‘we have to go, y/n!’ yeonjun grabbed you by the arms and pulled you back, but you shrugged him off and went back to stroking over your horse’s lifeless snout. ‘if we don’t leave now, we’ll both be dead!’
as irrational as you wanted to be, he was right. you felt numb as he grabbed you and pulled you to stand. you didn’t really understand what was going on, your mind was hazy. yeonjun held you behind a tree while you tried to calm down, a hand placed over your mouth to silence your cries. you only snapped out of it when you heard him wince in pain, and noticed the arrow that had just skimmed past his arm.
this time, you grabbed his hand and began running with him. you had no idea of which direction you were running in, just that you wanted to get far away from your attackers. you began to grow hopeless after running yourselves to exhaustion, when you spotted an old, small house not too far away. the coast seemed clear, so you silently agreed on the plan with yeonjun and made a run for the house.
he tried the door handle first while you scanned the area in a paranoid and erratic manner. it was stiff, but he managed to nudge the door open. he grabbed your hand and dragged you inside before slamming the door behind you.
‘close all of the curtains,’ he ordered, and you did so happily. you liked this side of him. he was assertive and put-together. ‘i’ll block all of these doors off so they have no chance of getting inside, but we have to be quiet.’
it was almost half an hour of making sure they wouldn’t be able to break in, and all you could think of was wrapping up yeonjun’s wound. that thought made you feel stupid, because you knew the slice on your arm wasn’t bothering him in the slightest. still, you began searching the cupboards for anything to wrap it up. of course, it was practically bare. but if by magic, there sat some gauze on a high shelf. you climbed up until you could reach it, as well as grabbing the only knife left behind by whoever used to reside here.
‘come here,’ you called softly. ‘we need to wrap that wound up before you bleed out.’
you pulled out a chair and took a seat at the small table. it was incredibly dark, but your eyes were adjusting enough for you to make out the objects in your hands. yeonjun pulled out the only other chair and sat close to you. he grabbed your wrist and turned your arm over.
‘and what about you?’ he sounded tired, the sound tugging at your heart. ‘you’re grieving, y/n. i’ll wrap your arm up and you’ll go to bed, and i’ll take care of myself.’
‘yeonjun, please,’ your voice broke. ‘i’m too afraid to sleep.’
he ignored your words and went straight to wrapping your arm up in the gauze. when he got to the end, he held the material between his teeth and sawed away at it with the knife. then he tied it into a dainty bow, making sure to keep it pretty as he felt you deserved.
‘now—’ he tried to speak, but you cut him off immediately.
‘i’m not tired,’ you reminded. ‘let me do the same for you.’
yeonjun didn’t want to fight. he’d lost all desire to rile you up. he’d seen a new side of you, and his opinion was starting to change. you weren’t heartless, you cared so much about everybody and everything. he’d seen you break down over a horse you’d loved throughout your childhood, you saved his life, and you were begging for him to let you help him.
he didn’t see you as a person, that was his problem. as children, you were an annoying little girl who always wanted to be in his space. as teens, you were rude and could never see eye-to-eye with him. and as adults, you made it as clear as possible that you wanted nothing to do with him. it was rejection after rejection. you’d glare and roll your eyes, scoff and groan every time he spoke. he wasn’t invited to join you and your friends, he only ever saw you at formal events. you were cold towards any man in your path, including close friends of his that he’d grown up with. all of this just painted you as a dark, looming presence in his life. you always had something sarcastic to say, you snapped and broke character easily around him, you always had the perfect insult to throw his way and you wouldn’t dream of viewing him in any way other than the opinion you’d created of him in your mind.
you wrapped the fabric tightly around his arm, and he tensed his arm in pain. he looked down to meet your concerned gaze and he relaxed again, but he was hoping you hadn’t noticed.
‘you’re so full of surprises, princess,’ he whispered.
‘what’s that supposed to mean?’ expecting an insult, you pulled tightly on the bandage again. yeonjun grunted in pain, and you felt your body heat up.
‘perfect self defence, stamina for running, you can control a horse, you’re strong, and you know how to wrap gauze,’ he smiled, ignoring that you were totally taking everything he said the wrong way. ‘i was thinking you were just a girl dressed in bows and lace, dreaming of owning a castle.’
‘well, you don’t know me very well,’ you tied off the end of gauze, your hand lingering on the sleeve of his shirt for a little too long. your eyes dropped to the area of his chest visible due to the first few buttons being left undone. you guessed he didn’t find time to fix himself in between all the running and trying not to die. ‘i never wanted to be queen. i love bows and lace, but the new castle will be too lonely and too large.’
‘you have a point,’ he agreed. ‘it was built way too far away from the centre of the kingdom. and what will they do with the two empty castles?’
‘don’t you mean, what will we do?’ you sighed and stood up, placing the knife down onto the table and approaching the bed. ‘don’t you wonder who used to live here? and how come they left all of this behind?’
‘all of what?’ yeonjun followed you, stopping in front of you. you were only inches apart, but he stood taller than you. ‘it was poorly built, it’s cold, and it’s in the middle of nowhere.’
‘it’s quaint and beautiful,’ you whispered, realising there was no need to speak when you were this close. ‘much less lonely than a large castle with too many rooms to count.’
yeonjun grabbed your hand, interlocking your fingers. the both of you watched your hands before locking gazes.
‘what would you do?’ he whispered back. ‘with the castles.’
‘schools,’ you felt your body forcing you to step closer to him. ‘education for everyone, no matter their status. every girl—’
his lips pressed against yours. only for a moment, and it was the lightest touch, but it made you feel warm inside. when your lips parted, he was still only inches away from you. he dropped your hand and placed one hand in your hair in order to pull you in again. you moaned into his mouth and let yourself melt into the kiss.
‘i’m sorry,’ you pulled away, eyes closed and lips pursed. ‘i’m so sorry, i don’t know what came over me.’
‘why are you sorry?’ he leaned to place his forehead against yours, his eyes also falling shut. ‘it’s just you and me, princess… it’s just you and me for the rest of our lives.’
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yeonjun didn’t sleep. you’d passed out with your head on his chest hours ago, and he laid thinking about you and the kiss you’d shared. never in a million years did he think he would fall in love with you, but now he was realising he just wasn’t allowing himself to fall. why did it bother him that you paid him no mind? and why did he enjoy poking and prodding at your nerves until you inevitably snapped? because he wanted to be something more to you.
the sun shone intensely through the gaps in the curtains. you whined and buried your face into yeonjun’s chest without realising what exactly you were doing. he lifted his hand and held it over your eyes, protecting you from the sun. he wanted you to keep sleeping, he wanted to keep thinking, he wanted to stay in this small space alone with you forever.
alas, your eyes opened and you were met with yeonjun looking down at you. immediately, you sat up and apologised. he just smiled and stretched his arms above his head, making his shirt ride up above his hips.
‘you look terrible,’ you commented. ‘you’re covered in blood.’
‘i could say the same for you, princess,’ he gave you a lopsided, half smile. ‘your mother is going to hate me.’
‘my mother loves you,’ you laughed shortly. ‘you could set a village alight and she would still defend you.’
‘we should set off to get home before nightfall,’ he suggested. ‘i’d rather deal with our parents now rather after two nights of us fighting for our lives.’
the walk home took several hours. it was easier once you’d made it onto the path, and once yeonjun had insisted on holding your hand so that you wouldn’t fall behind. walking into the castle grounds was terrifying, the stall keepers whispered amongst themselves and mothers covered their children’s eyes. who could blame them? the future king and queen were walking hand-in-hand, covered in blood and in clothing that had been ripped and stained black and brown. not to mention that you were both barely clothed, having had to flee from the inn mid-preparation for bed.
word spread like wildfire and your mother came running out of the castle to see if it was true. she pulled you away from yeonjun and into her arms, checking you for injury. then she ushered the both of you inside as quickly as possible.
you were taken away by servants to be bathed, treated and dressed in appropriate clothing. for the next few hours, all you could think about yeonjun. the way his lips felt, the way his fingertips rubbed against your scalp to send you to sleep, his warm hand in yours, the skin showing beneath his shirt, the way his gaze now softened whenever he looked at you. it made you feel giddy and childlike, and you were kind of thankful for the men who’d tried to hunt you down.
yeonjun didn’t seem to be around. he wasn’t seated at the table for meals, you didn’t see him walking around the castle, and you hadn’t heard anyone else mention his name. a part of you wondered if it had all been a dream.
that was, until nightfall.
the shock of everything you had experienced and the pain you felt every time you relived the memory of your horse being shot down had kept you inside. not just inside the castle, but inside of your room. so when it came to the night, you were finally free to walk around the castle.
you peeked through your door before opening it fully, and began walking towards the servant’s entrance into the kitchen. it was no longer mandatory for use, per your mother’s request, but you loved how quickly it took you into the kitchen. you stepped down the steep staircase and pushed open the door at the bottom, only to be met with a figure standing by the sink. they turned back at the disturbance and you realised that, in all his glory, it was yeonjun.
‘y/n,’ he practically sighed. it was obvious, even under the candlelight, that he was tired. he’d had no chance to sleep, not that you knew it yet, and was too shaken up to do so even if he’d had the chance. ‘i didn’t mean to disappear on you.’
‘i’m not upset, yeonjun,’ he loved the way you said his name when it wasn’t coming out as a snarl or mid-insult. ‘i was worried about, if i’m being honest.’
‘i had to talk with our fathers,’ he placed his cup down. ‘they’re going to put in a new law surrounding treason.’
‘and that is?’ you came towards him, stopping just a few feet away from him.
‘punishment of death,’ he sighed. ‘i don’t have hope.’
‘that’s awful,’ you agreed. ‘but we don’t have much choice, do we? it’ll either do well to scare them off, or we’ll be sentencing hundreds of men to their deaths.’
‘i’m worried that it won’t work,’ he admitted. ‘that they’ll come back for you and you won’t make it out alive this time. then does it really matter if they’re killed for their crime?’
‘we’re protected here,’ you reassured. ‘the world won’t take me away that soon, i’m not done bothering you yet.’
yeonjun couldn’t take it anymore, he’d been going crazy thinking about you all day. he placed his hands on either side of you and kissed you hard to try and portray at least some of the emotion he felt towards you. you wrapped your arms around his neck and reciprocated the kiss, no longer feeling the need to apologise for wanting to be this close to him.
‘and i’m not done loving you yet,’ he mumbled between kisses, making you pull back with a smile.
‘don’t tell me you’ve fallen in love with me over the past twenty four hours,’ you smirked. yeonjun felt his heart skip a beat at this new flirty side of you.
he didn’t feel the need to answer, it was obvious that you were right about his feelings. he lifted your chin and placed another tender kiss to your lips. finally, for the first time, you actually felt at peace, and you didn’t feel like disrupting it.
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jjuxii · 2 years
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pairing : soccer captain!beomgyu x fem ice skater!reader
genre : enemies-friends-lovers, smau + written chapters fluff, comedy (attempted), angst
featuring : winter from aespa
warnings : bullying, cursing, to be added (+)
being able to have the opportunity to be one of the exchange students in arcadia academy especially at this year’s annual sports event and districts has it’s great perks and benefits for y/n until she spilt coffee on the soccer captain’s new soccer shoes.
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MAIN LOBBY
profiles one | profiles two
1. Welcome | EXTRA
2. Bad impression
3. Ratio
4. Calm down
5. Thinking 5/2. One condition
6. First advice
7. Teach the basics
8. Grudge
9. Denial
10. Oh shit
11. Practice reasons
12. Hello Kitty
13. Worth
14. Your what
15. Go
16. Lost contact
17. Ankle
18. Closure
19. Hatred
20. Take it 20/2. You did it?
21. Curse
22. Lucky Charm
23. Insane
24. Befriend
25. Deja Vu
26. Bad idea
27. Gift giving is his love language???
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published : april 29,2022
ended :
taglist (closed) : @darrensos @letmeal0ne​ @yeonyeonyeonjun @day6andetcetera @stephsfav @ni-sh @pr0dbeomgyu @yurhrt @ashxxkook @tsookies @strawbrinkofdeath @chonjaeidol @junqwonni @igotkpoops @tonightletspretend @sfthyuka @kaeslily @butterflyy-ningg @magicalstudentwhispers @snert-bees @cherrybeomgyu @theyurina @dumwifi @chiefturtlebonkghost @i-yeseo @soobsfairy444 @l4veric @garbageandhot @zahraaa-444 @bergandysam @bibinnieposts @captivq @yeonjunsrealgf @erodemyedges @gyubearsworld @alexayoonlee @aiternu @rjsmochii @luvsoobs @ellesalazar @sansluvr @hursheys @yeonjuns-earring @yawnjns @oceanyocean send an ask or a message to be added (bolded cannot be tagged)
general taglist : @juniblvssom @wccycc @enhacolor @aestheticsluut
all of my updates are scheduled
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gxhaode · 1 year
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To all the boys I’ve loved before
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Pairing: Student!ChoiYeonjunxstudent!femreaderxchildhoodbestfriend!ChoiBeomgyu
Summary: Your romantic life was practically non-existent, only having crushed on a handful of guys which never went anywhere. All of this took a turn after Yunjin, your best friend, decided to mail your crushes the letters that you wrote for them during your crushing phases. What happens when one of the letters ends up at Choi Beomgyu door, your best friend since diapers or worse, your ex best friend's boyfriends, Choi Yeonjun? Will Yunjins tactic finally get you to find love or will it just lead to disaster?
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Genre: Highschool au, social media au, love triangle, light angst, fluff, crack
Warnings: swearing(this is all I can think for now but if theres anything else that you notice and think should be a warning do let me know:) )
Features: Txt, lesserafim, aespa,enhypen
Start: 10th March 2023
End: 12th July 2023
Status: Completed
A/N: I am currently in my last year of school before I start university so A LOTTT of exams are coming up so my posting days might be a bit off due to that:’) but I’ll try my best to be organized and have everything ready for u guys in time:)
Taglist:OPEN
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Profiles:
Moodboards:
Y/n, Yeonjun, Beomgyu
Socials:
y/n’s bullies | skateboardclub | thechadsquad
Chapters:
Monologue
Chapter 1: I hate it here
Chapter 2: im single BY CHOICE
Chapter 3: WHOS WE💀‼️
Chapter 4: this bouta be good🍿
Chapter 5: I AM A COWARD.
Chapter 6: Message from Unknown
Chapter 7: Jesus’s doorstep
Chapter 8: DO IT
Chapter 9: he dead.
Chapter 10: Soobin the human shield🤩🛡️
Chapter 11: did that girl just faint? (Written)
Chapter 12: Man its only Tuesday
Chapter 13: Yuny/n era?🤭💗💗
Chapter 14: hes lost it😭😭
Chapter 15: oNe EyE oPen wHen YoUre SleEpinGggg
Chapter 16: r u gasslighting me rn?😀
Chapter 17: Hunting y/n for sports😍(Written)
Chapter 18: Are you mental?
Chapter 19: Get that dick y/n😩
Chapter 20: the contract
Chapter 21: just go knock?💀
Chapter 22: oh.
Chapter 23: text y/n
Chapter 24: its on
Chapter 25: you’re cute♡
Chapter 26: rebound shit😭
Chapter 27: oh bby…
Chapter 28: The scrunchie (written)
Chapter 29: no💞
Chapter 30: YOU JEALOUS BROTHA(Smau +written)
Chapter 31: its always Soobin(Smau + Written)
Chapter 32: im fine wdym
Chapter 33: wtf is going on😭
Chapter 34: Operation SS
Chapter 35: SS Shananigans
Chapter 36: Toxic Relationships(Written)
Chapter 37: Ill be here for you(Written)
Chapter 38: OH IM WORRYING
Chapter 39: Ski trip day🥳🏔️
Chapter 40: me and you<3(written+smau)
Chapter 41: never🤙🏻
Chapter 42: haters gonna hate.
Chapter 43: guys?😀
Chapter 44: Jacuzzi(Smau + Written)
Chapter 45: we need to talk (Written)
Chapter 46: preach🗣️
Chapter 47: no homo
Chapter 48: pull a y/n
Chapter 49:Endgame
Taglist: @ghostfacefricker6969 @yumilovesloona @il0vebeomgyu @curly-fr13s @blueishwoodz @kaewonie @uno7 @hyu-kas @daisyhwa @captivq @s00buwu @lixie-phoria
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sadnightforus · 7 months
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HEARTBREAK STATION 
 Heartbreak Station is a radio station that presents itself with 7 tracks, which are picked by the listeners’ most popular requests to play on the radio. Each track will present itself with a short story, mostly the backstory of how they had come to love the song or a song that shows a glimpse into their lives at one point. 
GUESTS WITH THE MOST VOTES FOR THIS WEEK
OSAKI SHOTARO (RIIZE/NCT)
JUNG SUNGCHAN (RIIZE/NCT)
KIM HONGJOONG (ATEEZ)
CHOI YEONJUN (TXT)
HWANG HYUNJIN (STRAY KIDS)
JOHNNY SUH (NCT 127)
YOON KEEHO (P1HARMONY) 
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1ST TRACK: DON’T SAY GOODBYE (OSAKI SHOTARO)
 Your message to the person you dedicated this song to: I really loved you, I did. But as they said, love is never enough. 
 Summary: You both loved each other. So much. But you made the hardest decision to break up while you were dining — one last time together because the love you both shared was beginning to consume every sanity you have.  
NOW PLAYING: DON’T SAY GOODBYE BY BLOO. 
RELEASE DATE: UNKNOWN. 
PRESS PLAY TO READ THE BACKSTORY. 
2ND TRACK: MISMATCH (JUNG SUNGCHAN)
 Jung Sungchan’s message to the person he dedicated this song to: We are a pair of mismatches, deep down. But I still adore you, no matter how much time has passed. 
 Summary: He spent time trying to figure you out. You were not the easiest person to understand, but he tried. His only fear was you abandoning him, all alone in this cold world. 
NOW PLAYING: SO THAT YOU DO NOT GET UPSET BY TAEK. 
RELEASE DATE: 10 SEPTEMBER 2023
PRESS PLAY TO READ THE BACKSTORY. 
3RD TRACK: HARD TO LOVE (KIM HONGJOONG)
 Kim Hongjoong’s message to the person he dedicated this song to: Thank you and I’m sorry that I was horrible to you. I’m sorry that you only get to know my heart when I’m not sober. 
 Summary: It’s been months, exactly 7 at that. And every time that Hongjoong shows up at your doorstep, drunk and vulnerable, you let him back in for another night. 
NOW PLAYING: HARD TO LOVE BY ONE. 
RELEASE DATE: 14 SEPTEMBER 2023
PRESS PLAY TO READ THE BACKSTORY. 
4TH TRACK: I DON’T LIE (CHOI YEONJUN)
Your message to the person you dedicated this song to: God, I can say that our relationship exhausts me. But one thing for sure, I don’t think I can ever stop loving you, even if you lie to my face multiple times like that. 
Summary: It was perfect, you got the guy of your dreams and he loves you. Over time as he no longer loves you like he used to, you still hold onto the hope that he might come back one day and tell you the lie ‘I love you’. 
NOW PLAYING: I DON’T LIE BY HEIZE (FT. GIRIBOY)
RELEASE DATE: UNKNOWN. 
PRESS PLAY TO READ THE BACKSTORY. 
5TH TRACK: SELFISH LOVE (HWANG HYUNJIN)
Your message to the person you dedicated this song to: Honestly.. you were toxic to me. But I was also a toxic person too. So I guess it’s fair, yeah? I hope you hear this and it’s the last song I'm ever gonna dedicate to you. 
 Summary: You both don’t know how it happened. You went from a perfect couple to angry lovers in a span of 3 years. Overtime, it became a chore to not piss each other off and it’s time that you gave up the dead love bond, which both of you attempted to sparkle it up. 
NOW PLAYING: SELFISH LOVE BY DEPT. 
RELEASE DATE: UNKNOWN. 
PRESS PLAY TO READ THE BACKSTORY. 
6TH TRACK: HAPPY BIRTHDAY, JOHNNY (JOHNNY SUH)
 Your message to the person you dedicated this song to: I hope you’re happy, wherever you are. We haven’t seen each other in a long time and the last time we did, you were in a bad state. I hope you’re doing better now than you were a year ago. 
Summary: You both fell in love, you both fell out of love. You saw him again, but he was unrecognizable and by the look of his eyes, he had gone through a lot. You aren’t a thing anymore, but your place will always welcome him back if he decides to. 
NOW PLAYING: HAPPY BIRTHDAY, JOHNNY BY ST. VINCENT. 
RELEASE DATE: UNKNOWN. 
PRESS PLAY TO READ THE BACKSTORY.  
7TH TRACK: YOUR TYPE (YOON KEEHO)
 Yoon Keeho’s message to the person he dedicated this song to: I really like you. I do. But I know that you’ll never feel the same as me. So I’ll stay by your side and continue to be your friend
Summary: He falls for you, classic right? But you never pay attention to him, not even a little. He can only be by your side as your best friend. The kind of best friend who you call when your partner dumps you, gets scared, freaked out or needs urgent help. But he’ll never be the kind of best friend you’ll call and confess your romantic feelings to. 
NOW PLAYING: YOUR TYPE BY CARLY RAE JEPSEN. 
RELEASE DATE: UNKNOWN. 
PRESS PLAY TO READ THE BACKSTORY. 
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COPYRIGHTED BY SADNIGHTFORUS, 2023
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blossom-hwa · 2 years
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if you’ll have me (i) | c.yj
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here’s (finally) the first part of the monster yeonjun fic I wrote in august, right in time for his birthday! happy birthday to the terrible wonderful human being who has given me the worst brainrot I've experienced in a while (second only to the rot brought on by one kang taehyun), and I hope you all enjoy this <3
Pairing: Yeonjun x fem!reader
Genre: fluff, angst, regency era!au, nobility!au
Warnings: mentions of past death, mentions of period-typical misogyny
Word Count: 11.3k
Yeonjun Choi, Duke of Hastings, is in want of a wife. Boxed in from all directions by the overbearing mamas of the ton, he begins his arduous search this season for not fortune, not love, but merely the perfect woman to succeed his mother's place. None of the daughters of high society manage to catch his eye, however, or fit his overwhelming list of standards—at least until he meets Miss Y/N L/N, the queen's diamond of the season, newly arrived in town from abroad and said to be one of the most accomplished women to grace the ton in a generation.
You, the eldest daughter and only child of the L/N family, just want stability. With your father dead and the estate passed to a cousin, leaving only your dowry and a small pittance from the inheritance left intact, you begin your search for a husband with money enough to keep you and your mother afloat. It seems like a miracle when, after being crowned the queen's diamond, the Duke of Hastings himself asks for your hand—but as you learn of his complete indifference to the concept of love, you begin to doubt yourself. Perhaps money is not enough to keep your hand—maybe you desired a true love match more than you thought.
Trapped in a marriage of convenience that everyone believes is a love story, you and Yeonjun find yourselves forced to reevaluate what you want out of this match. Between balls and promenades, dances and poetry, you begin to view each other beyond the pithy conversations allowed in the courting stages, learning to see one another not just as business partners, but perhaps friends as well. And as you begin to reconcile your needs and wants, your goals and desires, maybe, just maybe—
The ton's belief that you are a love match can find some truth, too.
Part 1 >> Part 2
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The minute Yeonjun enters the club, he makes a beeline for the corner where Soobin is sitting, two small glasses set on the table in front of him. He flops into a chair and downs one of them immediately. “I am so sick of debutante season.”
Soobin raises an eyebrow. “The season hasn't even started,” he points out.
“Exactly,” Yeonjun groans. “If it's this bad even before they've been presented to the queen, how much worse will it get when all the balls and courtships start?”
“It's kind of your fault,” Soobin says, picking up the other glass. “Maybe you shouldn't have announced your intention to find a wife so early on.”
“I didn't mention it,” Yeonjun hisses. “That rat bastard Wooyoung let it out before I was ready to say it publicly—”
“That's on you for letting Wooyoung hear you,” Soobin interjects calmly. And Yeonjun can't even argue with that—he loves Wooyoung, loves his friend dearly, but Wooyoung's loose tongue is arguably his worst trait—so all he does is slump back into his chair and raise a finger for another drink. “You're supposed to be comforting me,” he sulks. “Some best friend you are.”
“Well, I've made my opinions about your ways of getting a wife very clear, and you've elected to ignore every single one of them.” Soobin smiles. “Some best friend you are.”
“What's wrong with a list?” Yeonjun frowns, crossing his arms. “Every man—no, every person—has to have ideas about who their future partner might be, I've just written it out.”
“It's not the list that's the problem. Though I'm pretty sure not a lot of people would actually write a list, either.” Soobin finishes the rest of his drink just as Yeonjun's second one comes. “It's your requirements for the people on that list that is the issue.”
“What's wrong with my requirements?”
“They're so demanding.” Soobin places his empty glass down with a loud clack. “How many people, men and women of all ages included, do you think are actually fluent in all those languages you require? All those instruments? All that dancing? Impeccable decorum too, and on top of that, to have a proper, pretty visage of some sort—”
“That's not even a requirement,” Yeonjun argues. “My main goal is to try and find someone with a sound and clever mind to help me run the estate since my mother wants to retire to the country—”
“And that's well and fine, Yeonjun.” Soobin sighs. “My point is, your requirements are so stringent as to alienate every lady in this society from the prospect of marrying you.”
“Soobin, I hate to sound egotistic—” Soobin snorts, which Yeonjun staunchly ignores— “but they're literally leaping for my hand.”
“And you've turned away every single one who has dared to approach, as well as every single one you've invited for one of your little... interviews.” Soobin's nose scrunches, and it's not the nice nose scrunch. It's the annoyed one. Maybe even disgusted. “That's not how you get to know your life partner.”
Yeonjun rolls his eyes. “I'm not looking for love,” he snaps. “I'm looking for someone who will do her job as duchess. That's what I need right now, not love.”
“You won't be able to live well with someone you hate, regardless of how good she is at managing estate affairs.”
“I know. That's why a pleasant demeanor is also something I'm looking for.” Yeonjun snorts. “It's also why I won't be considering Mary Kim at all, no matter how much money her family might have.”
They both have to laugh at that. Mary Kim is a menace upon the ton's society—accomplished, perhaps, but completely unbearable in conversation. Yeonjun remembers saying before that he would rather cut off his hand than brave more than one dance with her. It wasn't a joke then, and it still isn't now.
“I just wish I was married already.” Yeonjun sips at his second drink, relishing the slight burn as it slides down his throat. “It would appease everyone—my mother wouldn't be hounding me anymore, Beomgyu would stop teasing me, and all the ton's mamas would stop trying to throw their daughters at me, too.”
“It's not that hard to get married,” Soobin replies. His eyes turn faraway, a little lovesick smile playing on his lips.
Yeonjun fixes his best friend with a deadpan glare. “Not everyone can have a fairy tale romance with a good, sweet, capable girl you've known since birth, Soobin.”
Soobin blushes, which Yeonjun counts as a win, but he doesn't relent. “You could really just loosen your list of requirements,” he says. “You're a duke, not a god.”
“I never claimed to be a god, nor do I think I want to be one.” He wrinkles his nose. “All those people who want to find the secret to immortality are idiots. Who wants to stay on earth forever?”
“I forgot how philosophical you get when you're tipsy,” Soobin mutters.
“I'm not tipsy,” Yeonjun protests. “I’ve only had two, and I hold my alcohol better than you. Anyway, it's not like my requirements are completely unreasonable. My mother could do all of this, and it's why my father decided to court her.”
“Oh, so it wasn't because of the fact that they fell in love, and your father would have no one else but her regardless of whether or not she was fluent in Latin and Greek?”
Yeonjun scowls. “Look, the point is, these skills gave my mother the ability to both be a competent duchess and be seen as one, as well. My future wife will have to maintain her image, and having these skills will only aid her in that endeavor.”
Soobin sighs. “You're not going to let up, are you?”
“No.”
“Well, you might have one stroke of luck left.” Soobin smiles. “I hear that the L/Ns are coming back into town. And that the eldest daughter of the family might be one of the most accomplished women to grace the ton in a generation.”
“The L/Ns?” Yeonjun frowns. “Why did they leave town, again?”
“The late lord died suddenly without a male heir, and in the wake of his death, the rest of the family went abroad.” Soobin accepts a refill of his small glass. “Some more gossipy people will say that it was because he spent too lavishly and left the family in a dire financial situation, but I don't think that's true.”
“Then what happened?” Yeonjun asks.
“My mother knew them somewhat well, I think. She said that around the time he died, his mother, who lived abroad, fell ill, so the family moved to take care of her.”
“Who took over the estate?”
“Some distant cousin. I don't think you've met him, and I don't know him very well either—he spends most of his time in the country and seems to keep to himself even when he is in town.” Soobin purses his lips. “I don't think he's necessarily hostile to the late lord's family, but they aren't close.”
“So will they be staying at the estate for the season, then?” Yeonjun presses. “And why are they coming back?”
“The late lord's mother died,” Soobin says. “There was no reason for them to remain abroad, so they should be returning just in time for the season. And I don't know for sure, Yeonjun, considering I'm not exactly privy to all of their plans, but I don’t see any reason why they wouldn’t be staying at the estate. Not when there isn’t any obvious hostility towards the lord.”
Yeonjun cocks his head. Sips his drink. “I haven't met the daughter yet, have I?”
“Not closely, I don't think.” Soobin shrugs. “We were both at boarding school during the time she would have been growing up in town. I only know this much because my mother was close with them and has been in some contact with them since they decided to return.”
Yeonjun downs the rest of his glass. “And you say she has the ability to meet all of my oh-so-stringent requirements?”
“If what I've heard is correct, then I think she's the one who will ever come the closest.”
“Well.” Yeonjun smiles, standing up. “I think I've found my next target. I've got to go, but do inform me if you hear anything else about her, will you?”
“You haven't even asked for her name,” Soobin snorts.
“Well?” Yeonjun crosses his arms. “Then what is it?”
“Y/N.” Soobin's eyes glint. “Her name is Y/N L/N.”
. . . . .
Someday, when you die, you are going to scour heaven and hell to find the person who invented these ridiculous traditions for poor debutantes such as you and kill them again. In the afterlife. Just because they deserve it.
Which is not to say everything is wrong with the tradition. You don't mind the white dress, nor the tasteful jewelry Sakura helped clasp around your neck and wrists. The gloves aren't too bad—you've gotten used to how slippery they feel when you try to grasp things—and the shoes are manageable.
But the feathers.
The feathers.
As you step out of the carriage, all you can think of beyond not tripping over your feet right then and there is keeping your balance enough that the ridiculous headdress topped with a plume of long, white feathers doesn't fall. Once on the ground, you raise a hand to try and steady it—
“Don't touch it,” your mother hisses, batting your hand away. “It looks fine.”
You groan. “It doesn't feel right, Mother.”
“It never feels right.” She gives you a sympathetic glance. “But I promise you, dear, it looks fine. Trust me.”
“All right, Mother.” You sigh, resisting the urge to touch the feathers again.
“Good girl.” She smiles taking your arm. “Come now—let’s go see you off.”
All around you, girls in varying shades of white and gold and all those ridiculous feathered headdresses have begun heading into the palace. You follow the crowd, trying not to get swept up in it—your mother plays an important role in this, expertly chivvying the two of you between the families clamoring to reach the hall—all the while trying to catch a glimpse of the palace finery that seems to float past your eyes too fast for you to process anything.
“Now remember, Y/N,” your mother whispers when you finally reach the room where you will wait to walk. “Remember—stand tall, step proudly, keep your balance—”
“I know, Mother,” you hiss, clenching your fingers so they don't go up to try and rearrange the headdress that you're absolutely certain is starting to fall. “Are the feathers still in place?”
“Yes they are, darling,” she replies patiently.
A twinge of shame ripples through your chest—she's trying her best, you know, trying her best to help you in every way she knows how, and you just keep fretting about the stupid feathers on top of your stupid head.
Well, if the feathers weren't part of this tradition, they wouldn't be a problem, the nastier part of you sniffs.
“You look wonderful.” Your mother clasps her hands together, and—oh, dear, you can see tears welling up in her eyes and now you feel like you're going to cry too. “No, dearest, don't cry,” she says, visibly holding back her own tears as she pulls a handkerchief seemingly out of nowhere and dabs at her eyes, then at yours. “Don't ruin your makeup for this big day, yes?”
“I won't.” You laugh, choking back your own tears. “I won't, Mother.”
“You look wonderful,” she repeats, lowering the handkerchief. “Not even the diamond of my season looked quite as well as you. You’ve grown to be so beautiful and capable—your father would be so proud to see you here, now.”
“Mother, please.” You laugh again but it comes out a little wet, with the lump in your throat and the tears beginning to brim anew in your eyes. “You're really going to make me cry, now.”
“We can't have that.” She dabs at your eyes again before looking over your shoulder. “Oh, my—they're about to start!”
Sure enough, not a minute after your mother speaks does the footman at the entrance clear his throat. The crowd of debutantes and mothers and siblings falls quiet, the silence broken only by a periodic shuffle or whisper.
You try hard not to think about the feathers that feel like they're about to slip off the top of your head.
“Mary Kim”, comes the first announcement, “presented by her mother, the Right Honorable Lady Kim.”
You swallow hard.
And so it begins.
. . .
The room has nearly emptied halfway of debutantes, and still you have not been called.
You take back everything you thought about your outfit earlier. The feathers are still atrocious and you want to rip the headdress off right here and now, debut be damned, but your hands have grown sweaty under the gloves, the light makeup Sakura helped you apply feels like it's suffocating your face, and the dress that you absolutely cannot fidget with no matter what has started to dig into your skin. You take a deep breath, standing up straight in the hopes that the fabric will stop itching if you try to touch as little of it as possible—
“We're next,” your mother hisses into your ear.
You nearly choke. “What—”
The crowd of debutantes parts for your path as your mother forcefully guides you to the front. You stare at the doors that will open in seconds, praying, praying, praying you don't trip on the hem of your skirts or on some pebble on the floor or, heaven forbid, the air itself—
“Y/N L/N,” intones the footman, “presented by her mother, the Right Honorable Lady L/N.”
Your mother takes your arm, and as the doors begin to open, you force yourself to breathe.
Your body moves automatically, hours of practice showing their worth in your memory. Posture straight, head level, chin tipped up just enough to suggest pride, but not so much as to indicate haughtiness. Your feet step sedately, one after another, small, light steps to accommodate the dress, and the hand not taken by your mother lies against your side, uncurling from the fist it was in before. Your gloves still feel like they're about to slip off your fingers from sweat and the headdress still feels like it's going to fall off your head, but you continue forward even after your mother stops, one step, then two. Then you halt.
And begin to curtsy.
Balance, your mother's voice rings in your head. Grace will follow. First and foremost, keep your balance.
And you do.
You lower your head into the curtsy, eyes fluttering shut for one moment as you try to calm your breath. Behind you, your mother remains bowed and you take that as your cue to do the same, praying your legs don't begin aching so much that you fall.
For one moment, two, three, you simply stand there, breathing, counting the breaths, the moments until the queen will dismiss you. She has done nothing else yet, you're sure—according to your mother, you would've heard the gasp and perhaps applause if she'd crowned her diamond, and it doesn't seem as though anything untoward such as a lady fainting in her dress has happened either. You haven't tripped, you haven't fallen, and you can hear no giggles or whispers that indicate anything about your dress or feathers being in some sort of disarray, there’s no reason to think you won’t be dismissed without fanfare just as the other ladies have been so far, which is all you need in the moment, just a proper dismissal without embarrassment—
Footsteps sound on the long carpet, coming from the front. Where the queen was sitting as you walked down the hall.
A greater hush falls over the already quiet crowd. You don't dare to lift your eyes at all to see what you are beginning to suspect might be the case.
The footsteps come closer. Closer. You squeeze your eyes shut and open them again, just in time to see a dazzling pair of shoes and the hem of an opulent skirt enter your vision—
A finger touches your chin. Lifts it. Begins to pull you up.
And you meet eyes with the queen herself, staring at you with a benevolent smile on her lips.
Your breath catches in your throat. The eyes of everyone in the room must be on you, you're sure, but your mind is swimming and everything feels like a blur and the queen is in front of you, the queen is really in front of you, smiling at you like you might just be her diamond of the season.
Her finger falls away, but the smile stays. Your heart pounds against your chest, so loud you're sure she must be able to hear it as her mouth opens and she says—
"Flawless, my dear."
Whispers and gasps fill the room, punctuated by a squeal or two—you don't dare look towards crowd to see who it was—and it doesn't matter because you couldn't, anyway, not when the queen has taken your face between her two gloved hands and is now pressing a soft, dry kiss to the top of your forehead.
She rises. Turns. Walks back to her seat at the far end of the hall. Dimly, you remember that that must be your cue to rise as well and you do, taking the two steps backward to reach your mother, head still lowered. Next to you, she rises, and you lift your chin to see every eye in the hall still fixated upon you.
“Did that—” you breathe, forcing your lips not to move— “Mother, did that truly just happen?”
“Keep smiling, dearest,” she whispers, expertly taking your arm once more. One glance to the side shows you a brilliant smile upon her face, joyful yet not gloating, wide yet still gentle, but you can feel her trembling against you even as she steadily turns you around. Putting on a mask, you remember, forcing yourself to breathe once, twice—you need to do that too. Keep smiling, keep smiling, keep smiling. Because everyone's eyes are on you, now.
Y/N L/N, the season's diamond.
. . . . .
In another universe, Yeonjun thinks he could actually enjoy balls as a sort of fun event. There's good food, if not very filling, there's alcohol and lemonade, and usually he can find a few people with whom he is friendly and to whom he can speak. And even if there aren't, as his mother will say, he was blessed with a friendly exterior and an extroverted personality. Beomgyu once said he could make friends with a tree if he charmed it the right way.
Of course, coming out of Beomgyu's mouth, it sounded more like an insult than a compliment, but Yeonjun has long since learned not to give in to his cousin's backhanded mockery.
Put this way, balls could be pleasant. Fun, even. Yeonjun doesn't even mind dancing at all the way some of his peers do—in fact, with the right person, it can even be relaxing. But the problem is, balls are not simply social get-togethers with people his age.
They're marriage contracts. Or at least attempts at them.
The second Yeonjun steps into the Kims' grand home, immediately the lady of the house assaults him with her painted smiles and sickly voice. “Your Grace!” she simpers, taking him by the arm. “I've heard you have chosen to be active this season, is this true?”
Inwardly, Yeonjun spits all the curses he can at an imaginary Wooyoung dancing around in his head. Outwardly, he smiles back. “Your sources are indeed credible, my lady,” he says, laughing as he gently tugs his arm away. “What you have said is true.”
“Oh!” The feigned surprise on Lady Kim's face will always make his stomach churn no matter how many times he sees it. “Well, in that case, I must introduce you to my daughter, Mary—she just debuted this season, I'm sure—”
“Your Grace!” Another mother appears—Mrs. Jung, Yeonjun remembers just as she parks herself firmly by his side, cutting Lady Kim off. He has exactly one second to wonder whether it is a blessing to be torn away from Lady Kim and a potential conversation with Mary or a curse to be thrown into another determined mama's path before Mrs. Jung thrusts her poor daughter in front of him. “My daughter, you'll know, she just debuted this season—she's a wonderful dancer, anyone would be lucky to have her hand—”
A split second glance around the large entrance hall tells him no one he knows is nearby enough to save him from the madness. Already other mothers have spotted him, are snatching their daughters' wrists to come and bombard him with heavy hints at a dance and a possible marriage, so he quickly signs Mrs. Jung's daughter's dance card—he doesn't even know her name, she wasn't on his shortlist of possible future spouses and between all the hubbub he didn't hear Mrs. Jung introduce her if she even did—and then disappears into the crowd with a beatific smile in her direction, only breathing a sigh of relief when he reaches the open ballroom.
“Yeonjun!” Wooyoung comes bounding up to him in seconds, one glass of something in each hand. He hands one to Yeonjun. “How are you faring so far?”
“Not well, and no thanks to you,” Yeonjun hisses, taking a hefty gulp of the drink. There are more beady-eyed mamas and daughters glancing his way here, some who followed him from the entryway and others who have just noticed him. “Why did you have to open your big mouth about me seeking a wife?”
“Well, it seemed like something the ton should know.” Wooyoung shrugs, shameless as ever. “You're now the most eligible bachelor in the room, don't you feel popular?”
Yeonjun rolls his eyes, ready to snap back something sharp that Wooyoung will take in stride and laugh off, eventually making Yeonjun laugh too, but then his eyes are drawn to a crowd of people in another corner of the ballroom, almost exactly mirroring the scene on his side. Only there, it's a horde of men dressed dashingly in their black and white instead of women in their vivid colors, crowding around someone who can only be—
“The season's diamond,” Wooyoung chirps, following Yeonjun's gaze. “Miss L/N.”
Yeonjun blinks. “You know her?”
“Not well, of course.” Mischief glints in Wooyoung's eyes, and Yeonjun can already sense he's in for a bout of relentless teasing. “Are you interested?”
“Of course I am.” He sniffs. “Who wouldn't be interested in the season's diamond? Especially after she's been away for several years?”
“Well, if you are, I would go and try to corner a dance right now.” Wooyoung jerks his head toward the crowd of men. “Before I am forced to leave—hey, don't give me that look, I can't stay with you forever—and the other mamas manage to ambush. Or, heaven forbid—” He leans in close. “Her dance card is full by the time you find the courage to approach.”
Internally, Yeonjun groans. This is why he hates balls—it's always a chase of some sort, him chasing a wife or everyone else trying to chase a husband—but he has to do it. His mother has done her job as dowager after his father's death, and she deserves her retirement. It's his turn to step up and take charge of the estate.
And he'll need a duchess at his side for that.
Quickly he downs the rest of his drink, placing it on an empty tray nearby. “Wish me luck,” he mutters to Wooyoung before heading straight into the throng.
. . . . .
Before this night, your mother grilled you on what to expect as an accomplished debutante, as well as what to expect as a diamond of the first water (for that is what they're calling you, apparently, those who saw you walk down the hall toward the queen).
It still did not prepare you for this.
The second you step into the ballroom, having successfully dodged the worst of Lady Kim's simpering compliments that felt more like backhanded insults than anything else, too many eyes turn towards you. You can feel them raking over your entire body, studying your makeup, your jewelry, every stitch of your clothing, and even though the attention makes you want to shrivel up and curl into a ball, you have to keep smiling.
Remember, dearest, every eye is now on you. Your mother's words ring through your mind once more.
You stand on a pedestal now, after having gained the queen's approval. It is an honor to have been chosen, but that just means there is only a greater distance to fall.
Your fingers itch for a pen and paper, preferably your favorite pencil and worn leather notebook. There's poetry here in the irony of your situation, but between the flurry of teas and fittings and brief outings between your debut and this first ball, you have had no chance to let your thoughts out onto paper for several days. Just little bits of writing here and there, on scraps of parchment and scribbled onto your hands...
But you can't focus on that tonight, not on the words whisking into poetry and prose in your mind. You swallow. Your goal is to find a husband, to secure financial stability for your family no matter what it takes.
And from what you've gathered over the short course of your lifespan, most men don't exactly appreciate poetry from the women they seek to marry.
So you lift your head, taking care not to gawk in any direction (because for all you think the Kim family is a menace to society, they do have good taste in decoration), and paste your practiced sweet smile to your lips. Like any good debutante should.
Like any diamond of the first water should.
Your mother stays with you, thank the heavens, as the men begin to approach. She did not exaggerate, you think dizzily as one request after another comes for a dance on your card—they are clamoring for your hand despite not having seen you anywhere in society for several years. It doesn't matter to them that you've been abroad, taking care of your ill grandmother. It doesn't matter to them that beyond your dowry you don't have that much money to speak of, most of it having gone towards her care. All that matters are rumors—rumors of your intelligence, rumors of your beauty—and the fact that the queen has named you her diamond.
There's poetry there too, scathing and elegant and itching to flow from your fingers, but you will just have to hold it back for tonight.
You do your best to look through the suitors, politely making conversation with those you allow to catch your eye, carefully passing your gaze over those you do not know or those you have heard will not treat you well. Your dance card fills rapidly even before the orchestra’s preludes are over and you've had too many offers of lemonade to count, and you're about to look at your mother—who's been patiently guiding you through the crowd, thank goodness—for some sort of excuse to clear your mind before the dancing starts, but just as you turn your head, a pair of eyes catches yours.
Your mother's grip tightens on your arm. You don't even need her frantic whisper to understand just who has come to seek a dance.
Yeonjun Choi. Duke of Hastings. The most eligible bachelor in this room, in status and in wealth.
Newly seeking a wife this season.
He comes forth, moving through the crowd with surprising ease. The other suitors seem to part for him, though you can see a few throwing him annoyed glances. He's handsome, ridiculously handsome—tall, with lush dark hair and captivating eyes. Your heart skips a beat.
No poetry there. Just a cliche, and an overused one at that.
But so very accurate in this moment.
“Miss L/N.” The duke stops in front of you, a brilliant smile on his face. “I don't believe we've met.”
“Your Grace.” You dip into the curtsy that has now become second nature to you and your legs. “I don't believe we have. To what do I owe the pleasure?”
“Modest, I see.” The smile grows wider. “I have heard tales of your beauty and wit, Miss L/N. I see your beauty has not been exaggerated—” you have to try hard not to topple over right then and there— “and had hoped to experience the pleasure of your conversation for myself, if it so delights you.” He dips his head in acquiescence. “That is, assuming your dance card isn't already full.”
Oh, he's good. Knows exactly how to flatter just enough that it seems genuine, but not so much that it becomes overkill. Your knees feel slightly weak—if it weren't for your mother holding you up, you think you might have fallen in between his compliments and smooth words, and if he had, you're pretty sure the duke would have caught you in some suave, gentlemanly way—and that is absolutely not something you should be imagining because your face already feels too hot just from his stare and you have words that you need to say.
“You are too kind, Your Grace.” You bow your head in acknowledgement of the praise, thankful for the practiced smile that never falls from your lips. “I believe I still have a few dances left on my card, if you should wish to take one. Perhaps the quadrille?”
“That sounds perfect,” he agrees readily, lifting the card around your wrist and quickly signing his name. When he drops the card, you go to pull your hand away but he catches it before you can, grip gentle but unrelenting as you look up in surprise.
Your entire body seems to freeze as he gazes into your eyes, that gentle smile still present on his lips.
“Your dance card is quite full, Miss L/N,” he says, still not letting go. “Take care not to tire or injure yourself by the end of the night.”
You nod slowly, not trusting your voice to speak at all. If you did, you might squeak, or something equally embarrassing.
His smile widen. “Until our dance then, my lady,” he says.
And presses a kiss to your fingertips.
. . . . .
Straightening his cravat, Yeonjun looks in the mirror one last time before meeting his mother in the estate's entryway. “Shall we?” he asks, holding out his arm.
“Not so fast.” She pushes the arm away, levels a scrutinizing eye over every piece of his outfit, from his styled hair to the tips of his shoes. “Acceptable,” she finally says, though Yeonjun can see the pleased glint in her eye.
“Only acceptable?” he teases back, pouting his lips heavily. “Am I not the most handsome son a woman could ask for?”
“Of course you are.” The mock crotchety look on her face melts away, replaced with fondness that makes Yeonjun's heart ache as she reaches up to touch his cheek. “I'm so proud of you, my son. Look at you—you've grown up so well, and now you're on your way to finding a wife, too.” She sniffs, bringing out the handkerchief she always carries in her sleeve. “Your father would be so proud to see you now.”
“I hope so, Mother.” Yeonjun smiles, holding out his arm once more. “Shall we go now? We should take care not to be late.”
The carriage ride to the park takes place mostly in silence, his mother quietly speaking with her attendant on one side while Yeonjun stares out the window on his. Streets flash by and he takes note as they approach the park where the two of you are to promenade today.
Some part of him is relieved that you agreed to his invitation. Though Wooyoung was right—he was the most eligible bachelor through and through that night at the ball—it was hard not to feel the sting of competition as he watched you dancing throughout the night, seemingly never tiring even once as you stepped gracefully across the ballroom in the arms of so many men. Just by watching, he could tell you were an incredible dancer, and when it came his turn to spin you in the quadrille, his opinion of you only increased tenfold.
Yeonjun knows he's a good dancer. He enjoys it, really, in a way not many of his friends do—it's fun to whirl about the ballroom in these practiced movements—calming, even, when he doesn't have to worry about beady-eyed mamas trying to hunt him down every second. But you—you floated about the ballroom as though you were made of air, your dress rippling in the light as though it was made of water. Not once did you stumble, which Yeonjun could have forgiven once or twice given that you'd never danced together before, and not once did you falter in the conversation he kept up even though you'd been dancing for at least an hour already.
The praise heaped upon your dancing and demeanor were not exaggerated, not in the slightest. So he wasn't exactly surprised when he arrived at your estate the next day and found a clamoring of suitors lined up outside of the calling room, flowers in hand and sweet words on their lips. When it was his turn to meet you, all the blooms scattered about the room made something strangely akin to jealousy twitch in his chest.
But it was a good opportunity to observe you after having accepted so many calls. You were as fresh-faced as ever as you greeted him, took the flowers from his hands and gave him appropriate thanks before settling them carefully in a vase before you. Several servants were arranging flowers in other areas of the room, but you took his personally, and there were no other bouquets he could see that had been given the same treatment as his.
“Blue is my favorite color,” you had told him as you bade him sit. “Did you know this?”
No, he didn't. He'd admitted as much. “A stroke of luck,” he'd smiled, and the morning call went on much as he'd planned.
Perhaps he will truly be lucky in this, he thinks as the carriage pulls up to the park. Perhaps you truly will be the epitome of a duchess that his mother was, the perfect woman to stand by his side as his partner in marriage as he oversees the estate his father left him. Because just from your first two meetings, Yeonjun has already formed quite a good opinion of you that many of the other ladies this season haven't managed to reach despite him having known them, or at least known of them, for several years. You are polite, you are reserved, you dance well, you speak well, and most importantly, you know how to act. Though, to be fair, he's basing this last conjecture on the fact that you didn't react to him kissing your hand—physically, at least—after he'd asked you for a dance.
Which was a blow to his ego. Somewhat. Yeonjun does take pride in his ability to fluster people—not even just women, but sometimes his friends as well—but it's a good thing, in this case. It means that no matter what you feel on the inside, you are not easily swayed on the outside. You can hide your feelings, an essential skill for a member of the ton—especially for one of the duchy.
All this is assuming, of course, that she felt anything at all when you kissed her hand, an annoying voice that sounds a lot like Beomgyu reminds him in the back of his head.
Yeonjun shoves the Beomgyu-esque voice away. That's a thought he doesn't really want to consider.
He helps his mother down from the carriage when they arrive and begins scanning the park for you and your mother. To his luck, you're standing not far away, and he gladly leads his mother up to the two of you. “Miss L/N!” he calls, letting his usual smile fall quickly over his lips. “I hope we have not kept you waiting.”
“No, you're right on time, Your Graces.” You smile, bobbing a shallow curtsy. “We merely thought it prudent to arrive a few minutes early, as we didn't want to make you wait.”
“Allow me to make introductions,” Yeonjun says. “This is my mother, the Dowager Duchess of Hastings. Mother, this is Miss L/N and her esteemed mother, the Right Honorable Lady L/N.”
“Your Grace.” Both you and your mother dip into deeper curtsies, easy and graceful. “It's a pleasure to meet you.”
“The pleasure is all mine. I see my son's praise of your manners has not been exaggerated in the slightest.”  His mother smiles, walking up to yours. “Come, Lady L/N. Let's let the young ones go ahead—I don't think I'll quite be able to keep up with them on these old bones.”
“Mother,” Yeonjun protests. “Your bones are hardly old.”
“You don't know what you're saying,” she sniffs, winking at your mother. At her side you're stifling a laugh, and despite himself, Yeonjun can't help but feel a fond smile widening his lips. “Go on, you two.”
Taking his cue, Yeonjun offers you his arm, making sure to direct that fond smile at you. “Shall we?”
. . . . .
A week later, you stand in the same park, again waiting for the duke to join you on a promenade. He's not late, you're just early, but as your mother waits anxiously by your side, you take the few moments of silence to think.
The duke—he's never been anything but kind or pleasant in any of your meetings. He's a far cry from many of the more obnoxious suitors you've had to endure in the calling room, those whose advances you've declined while still trying to be as gracious as possible. And he is far and beyond the best option you have at the moment, and probably the best option you're ever going to get. He's a duke, for heaven's sake—the only way you could go higher than him would be if you married a prince, and you're not even sure you’d ever want to go that far. Living in the palace sounds like a dream, but there are already so many rules you need to follow as a mere member of the ton—life as royalty would be even more restricting.
But while there's nothing obviously off-putting about the duke, you can't help but want to pause a little, reevaluate this situation without him nearby to put your thoughts into a spin. He's handsome, he's kind, he's clearly intelligent, and you're sure that he will respect you even in marriage. Sakura has told you of some rumors of him being a rake, but those mostly seem to have died down around the time his father died, when he would have been assuming the role of a duke. Which means he has a sense of responsibility. But even then, it's just...
Some part of you, even though you know it's kind of ridiculous, still hoped for a love match. One like your parents had, the relationship you saw when your father was still alive. While you've often listened to your mind over your heart, your heart still has a voice, and it wants to love and be loved in return.
Perhaps the duke might give you love. You don't know. But it doesn't seem like a priority for him at all, based on your conversations at the now three balls where you've danced with him, as well as the one promenade you've been on so far. While your words flowed well and there was never a moment of truly uncomfortable silence, it didn't seem like he was interested in getting to know you. It was more like he wanted to... interview you for a job, or something.
Which is fair, you suppose. Being a duchess is a job, that much is clear. But you still hadn't expected to spend an hour detailing every piece of your studies, your knowledge of current languages and the classics, the tutors you had for music and dance and mathematics.
Love shouldn't be a priority for you. It isn't, not according to the list of requirements you have for a husband sitting in your brain. Money comes first, followed closely by a pleasant demeanor that you could live with, even if you could not eventually come to love. Yeonjun fits both. If he were to propose marriage, you are sure would respond affirmatively.
But some part of you would still scream to say no.
“Miss L/N!”
Yeonjun comes walking jauntily up, that unflappable smile still on his face. Time to stop thinking.
You force yourself out of your thoughts, dipping into a little curtsy as he comes to a stop in front of you. Your mothers immediately draw towards each other—they've become great friends as far as you can see, which is one good thing that has come out of this—and so you take Yeonjun's proffered arm with a smile and allow him to lead you onto the pathway.
He asks you the usual questions—how are you, how is your mother, nothing untoward has happened since we last met, has it? You respond in kind, mouth moving automatically through the pleasantries, and then a short silence falls.
It's hard not to fall back into your previous thoughts, with the duke right on your arm. Everything about your recent meetings suggests he will propose by the end of the season, and you should be glad for it. This was what you wanted, was it not? Financial stability, and a husband who would be kind, at the very least.
Maybe you didn't expect how clinical this would all feel. Or maybe you underestimated how much you really wanted a love match.
“You seem preoccupied, my lady.” Yeonjun looks over, eyebrows furrowed in concern. “Is something the matter, Miss L/N?”
You press your lips together. You've honed the art of conversation for years, but right now, you're not sure if you should broach the subject of your feelings. It might not be the best idea—you don't want to turn Yeonjun away, not at all—but he seems like a straightforward person, generally. His little interview-conversation during your last walk only affirms that.
“During our last promenade,” you say quietly, nodding at a few girls who pass by. “I will be honest. It sounded more like a job interview, Your Grace—or at least what I imagine a job interview would be like. Not quite the conversation one would have on a simple walk.”
Yeonjun looks at you long and hard. For one nerve-wracking moment, he says nothing.
“Was it displeasing to you?” he finally asks. “If so, I apologize.”
“Not at all.” The dismissal falls easily from your lips, easily enough that you can almost believe it wasn't a full lie. “I suppose I was simply not expecting to be quizzed on my knowledge of Latin and Greek for an hour.”
The duke reddens slightly at that. “Surely I did not only speak of the classics for so long.”
“You didn't, Your Grace. I exaggerate.” You laugh a little. “I only wondered what exactly you were looking for in me during that time.”
“Would you like the truthful answer?” the duke asks, suddenly serious.
You blink. “If I were to say no, what answer would you give?”
He smiles a little. “Something flowery, perhaps. Something that would avoid the question and leave both of us unsatisfied. But you wouldn't want that, I think.”
“You're right.” He is. “I wouldn't want that.”
“Then I will be honest with you.” Yeonjun sighs. “I am a duke, and whomever I marry will be duchess. It is not a title to be taken lightly—we would be responsible not just for the estate, but also for the people of whom we are charged to take care. It is not the same as, perhaps, being the lord and lady of a manor. There are greater responsibilities.”
“I see.”
“There are two important things to being one of the duchy,” Yeonjun continues. “One is to be a good duchess—being able to run the household as well as assist me in any affairs that might need another hand, which in all honesty are many. The other is to be perceived as a good duchess. And that is where most of my questions come in hand.”
“I... see.” You slowly nod your head.
“My mother was one of the most accomplished women of her generation.” The two of you glance back at the duchess, who's still talking animatedly with your mother. “She knew all the languages that you do, could play the pianoforte well and even the violin, somewhat. Beyond the fact that my father loved her, she was also well suited to taking care of the estate, and she partnered with him well. She was seen as a duchess who was capable, and she proved it as well.”
Yeonjun turns back to you. “Miss L/N, forgive me for being frank—I have heard of your family situation. Correct me if any of this is wrong, but I believe that beyond your dowry, there is not much money left to take care of all of you without relying on others.”
You swallow. It was blunt, but he isn't wrong.
“But I am not looking for money. Heavens, my family has enough of that.” He laughs a little. “I am looking for someone who can be that partner for me, and based on our meetings so far, I think you are the only one of the eligible ladies this year—possibly in several years—to be able to handle all of this.”
Your head is starting to spin a little. Everything he's said so far makes sense, and you understand where he's coming from, but it's starting to sound—it's starting to sound like he's proposing to you right now—
“I will be honest in that I am not looking for love. If that is an expectation of yours, I will not be offended if you choose to seek someone else.” He pauses on the pathway, fixing you with his gaze. “But you are, I believe, a partner with whom I could be satisfied in navigating the rest of my life.”
He said so much. You took in everything that he said. But for some reason, the only words that continue to bounce around in your head are I am not looking for love.
Which is—ridiculous. You aren't looking for love either—at least, you shouldn't be. Your first priority is to secure financial stability for your family. Anything beyond that would be a plus. But you can't deny the slight sinking of your heart, the way you can feel all of your childish, sappy little daydreams sinking to the bottom of your skull...
You take a deep breath, force a lightness to remain in your tone. “Your Grace, this is beginning to sound like a marriage proposal.”
The duke's gaze doesn't waver. “If you'd like it to be, then it is.”
You're still holding his arm. It's all you can do to keep from clenching his elbow with a vice grip because you really think you might fall. You've gotten a marriage proposal—from a duke—in a matter of days—
“Allow me to be honest as well, Your Grace.” You swallow hard. “I am not looking for love either. My primary interest is securing a source of financial stability for my family, now that we no longer own our estate. It is not to look for love.” It's not a lie, you tell yourself even as the words burn slightly on your tongue. At least not completely. “However, while our values do seem to align, and I am extremely flattered by your proposal, I will ask that you wait a little longer for me to give you an answer. We have only known each other for the best part of three weeks. I would simply like some time to get to know you more.”
“That is a fair request.” Yeonjun inclines his head. “Don't worry—we do not have to treat today's conversation as a proposal at all, Miss L/N. If it so pleases you, I will ask again in a few weeks' time. Until then, please only think of our words today as a suggestion or an explanation of my thoughts, not as anything concrete. Your answer when I ask again will be the only one I consider.”
It's a better reply than you expected. He doesn't seem offended at all by your hesitance, and he was honest. There isn't much more you could want, not from a man such as he.
Part of you knows that if he'd demanded an answer right now, you would have said yes. That same part of you knows that your answer isn't likely to change even with a few weeks—this is the best offer you will receive, from a man who is both respectful and handsome and doesn't care about your relative wealth status compared to his. But it's fast, you think, too fast—you can't sign your life away after only knowing him for less than three weeks.
It has absolutely nothing to do with the twinge in your chest whenever you remember he has no intention of marrying you for love.
“You are very kind, Your Grace.” You smile at him. “Thank you for understanding.”
“Of course, Miss L/N.” He smiles back, oblivious to the thoughts still spinning around your mind. “Shall we continue our walk, then?”
. . . . . When Yeonjun wakes up, there's a sense of urgency in his chest that doesn't match the lazy light beginning to filter through the curtains against his window, a slight nervousness that doesn't quite make sense. His eyes blink blearily, searching for the clock—it's only eight. He hasn't missed anything important. His first engagement won't even be for three more hours, he can close his eyes and sleep for a little longer—
Engagement.
His eyes snap wide open.
Today is the day he's going to propose to you.
Heart hammering, he sits up in bed, shaking loose strands of hair out of his eyes. Quickly he dresses, all the while trying to think of everything he'll need for tonight and coming up with absolutely nothing except for the ring, which is snug in the pocket of his pants. He pulls it out, holds it up to the light.
Polished gold, a set of pearls laid into the metal surrounding a single small diamond. It has been in his family for generations—his mother had worn it until a few years ago, when she had decided that Yeonjun needed the reminder that he was to choose a wife soon. He stares at it, watches it shine in the early morning light, before sliding it safely back into his pocket. Nothing will happen to it, he tries to reassure himself. Absolutely nothing.
And nothing does happen to it throughout the day, thankfully, not during his meeting with the solicitor, not while he flips through finance sheets at his desk, not while he dresses once more for the dinner your mother has invited him to tonight. He'd spoken with her a few days ago, called on her in private while he knew you would be busy at the modiste, and asked for her permission to formally propose. She was the one who'd suggested the dinner as a way for him to ask the question to you in a somewhat private setting.
There should be no problem. All through the carriage ride to your estate, Yeonjun tries to calm his beating heart as his mother gazes at him amusedly from the other side. “Stop looking at me like that,” he finally says. “Mother.”
“I can't stop looking at my only son right now,” she scolds. “Not when he looks so handsome and ready to propose to his future duchess.”
Future duchess. Yeonjun takes a breath. Yes, you're to be his future wife and his duchess. The thought is surprisingly nerve-wracking.
It shouldn't be, though. He's had his mind set on you since that first conversation with Soobin at the club, since he met you at the first ball of the season. He's done everything this season with you in mind—he should be used to the idea of standing by you as your husband, you as his wife. Him as your duke, and you as his duchess.
His heart begins to calm. Yes, there's no reason to be nervous. The only reason you put off the question when he first suggested it was because you felt it was too early, and that's understandable, given it had only been three weeks and Yeonjun hadn't even meant to propose, really—it had just sounded like it, and you, ever perceptive, had picked up on it. It's been four weeks now since then, and he's danced with you at seven more balls, promenaded with you five more times, and you've already dined once at his estate with some of his extended family. He's asked your mother for permission. Everything will fall into place.
“Do you think she'll like the way I look?” he asks, winking obnoxiously at his mother.
She laughs. “There is no way she could refuse you. Why, if she isn't already in love, she'll have fallen for you by the end of tonight.”
The smile freezes on Yeonjun's face. Love, yes. The very thing he hasn't been focusing on at all when it comes to you.
You'd agreed with that. He'd suspected you would, given your tenuous finances—not dire, not yet, but still not stable. Besides, love is rare. You are practical. You know that. Most marriages are of convenience. You didn't express any sort of hurt or abandon when he'd given you his honest thoughts.
But his mother... maybe she wants him to be in love.
“Yeonjun?” She leans forward slightly, eyes narrowing. “Is everything all right?”
He blinks. “Of course,” he replies. And just then, the carriage rattles to a stop in front of an estate that has by now grown familiar, giving him the perfect excuse to avoid any other questions she might ask. As soon as he can, Yeonjun hops down from the carriage and holds out a hand for his mother to take. “Let's go, Mother.”
. . .
The dinner goes well. Your mother placed him next to you, and the two of you speak amicably through the evening as your mothers chatter at the end of the table. With every word that comes out of your mouth, every little laugh and witty jab, Yeonjun only grows even more sure that you are the one who should share the duchy with him.
When the dessert has finished and the last plate cleared away, your mother coughs subtly at the end of the table. Yeonjun takes the hint as they all rise from the table, turning toward her with his sweetest smile. “Lady L/N, I was wondering if you would allow me to solicit a private audience with your daughter. Just for a few moments.”
Her eyes sparkle. Yeonjun really wouldn't mind having her as a mother in law—she's dutiful, patient, and truly loves you in a way that is rare in this society today. “Of course, Your Grace,” she says, inclining her head. “Come, Your Grace—we will have some entertainment for ourselves in the sitting room. Please, the two of you, do join us when you are ready.”
Everyone else filters from the room, leaving it empty save for you and Yeonjun. Even the servants have gone from their silent posts around the table.
You look at Yeonjun quietly. Not a word passes from your lips, though there is a question in your eyes. Actually, perhaps not really a question—there's no way you don't know what is to happen in a moment. It's an invitation in your gaze instead, an expectation of what will come.
Yeonjun takes a deep breath. “A few weeks ago, I suppose I... unintentionally proposed to you on our second promenade.” He smiles and so do you, your eyes crinkling at his choice of words. He internally pats himself on the back for it. “You asked me for time, and I have given it. I suppose what I would say now is much of what I said then—I am looking for a duchess, a wife who can stand by my side as a partner in this marriage, who will help me in my affairs with ensuring the people of my land are treated well.”
You nod. “I understand, Your Grace.”
“It has been over a month since we met, nearly two.” Yeonjun swallows. “In that time, I have truly determined you are one of the most gracious, capable women I have ever had the pleasure of meeting, and I believe you will be the most able partner I could have in my journey of dukedom.” He pulls out the ring, letting the gems sparkle in the candlelight as he holds it out to you. “Will you do me the honor of being that partner, of becoming my wife and the Duchess of Hastings?”
For a long, long moment, you don't respond. Yeonjun counts the moments, counts the breaths—one, two, three, four—his heart beginning to thud the longer you go without speaking.
Finally, your gaze lifts from the ring to his eyes. “I have one stipulation in this proposal, Your Grace,” you say. “My mother—she believes... she believes we are in love.”
Yeonjun tilts his head. “I see.”
“She wants a love match for me. Always has, just like her and my father.” You heave a small sigh. “I am impartial, Your Grace. Love matches such as my mother's are rare, and I am more interested in securing the practicalities of my marriage. As we discussed before, I do not expect love from any relationship we have, but I will ask that... we pretend. In front of her.” You swallow visibly. “I don't want to deceive her, but I would rather do that than upset her.”
Yeonjun pauses. Thinks. Your mother won't live on your estate—nor will she be over often enough for acting to become a full time ordeal. You have a small home in the country, you have said, one your distant cousin has said you are allowed to live in, and while it is not far from his lands, it is not close, either. This stipulation shouldn't be an issue.
“I understand,” he says, smiling easily. “I will agree to this... act. Truth be told,” he continues, “I think my mother would like it if I were in a love match, too. Perhaps it will not just be your mother that we should act around.”
You nod once, slowly. Your throat bobs. For a moment it looks as though you have something else to say, but your expression clears so quickly that Yeonjun is sure he imagined it.
“So will you do me the honor, Miss L/N?” he asks again, taking your hand. The gold of the ring sparkles against the silk of your gloves, shimmering and pristine. “Of being my partner for life?”
You take a breath. Yeonjun watches your chest rise and fall once, twice.
“Yes, Your Grace.” You nod, and relief cracks deep and full in Yeonjun's chest, warmth rippling through his body as you smile. “I will.”
. . . . .
It hits you, exactly what you’re about to do to your future, when it's already too late.
The morning has been going—by all accounts of the situation—fine. You woke up early. Washed. Stared at your notebook that you haven't written in for two weeks, not since poetry stopped flowing from your fingertips in elegant lines and became stilted, choked, singular words instead. Tore your eyes from the leather cover and the pencil still lodged between its pages—it's easier not to question everything when you can't write about it—and left the room for a bite of breakfast before being whisked back to your room to dress.
Everything is—fine. It's fine. Everything is perfectly fine. Sakura helps you put on your wedding attire, settles the dress against your body, the gloves on your fingers, the jewelry around your wrists and neck. Light makeup dusts your face, reminiscent of what you wore to the first ball, and an elegant little flower crown adorns the top of your head. In the mirror, you look beautiful.
Or you would, if not for the fear you can see rooted deep in your eyes.
Your mother exclaims when you enter the room, hands gripping your arms as she looks you up and down. The servants stare in wide-eyed awe as you walk down to the entryway. You try hard to hide that fear from yourself and everyone else, settling into the carriage with only a wide smile on your face, and you force yourself to wear that smile the entire way to the venue as though pretending pure happiness will make it true.
You're whisked away immediately to freshen up once more. Sakura touches up the makeup, straightens the flower crown on your brow. You avoid looking at yourself in the mirror for fear of anyone—most of all yourself—seeing the truth in your eyes. Someone hands you a bouquet of flowers that compliments your gown and you thank them as best you can without losing your mind completely. Time passes, somehow, and then someone has dragged you behind the doors at the entrance of the hall where you wait for your cue.  
It starts. Music begins to play. You stand behind the closed doors, fighting for breath. Yeonjun will already be at the altar, you know, his family and friends on his side of the pews. Next to you, your mother counts down the seconds, dabbing tears from her eyes when she thinks you aren't looking until she gets to one and the doors begin to swing open.
One foot in front of the other. The muscle memory that you drilled into yourself for your debut—was that just three months ago? Really only three? It feels like it's been years and at the same time it feels like it's been days—returns, and your chin lifts slightly (just enough to suggest pride, but not so much as to indicate haughtiness) as your eyes settle on the man you are to marry at the end of the hall.
The man you are to marry.
Your foot falters. You almost trip. Your mother tightens her grip on your arm and you can see her glance at you worriedly but you force yourself not to look, to keep stepping forward—it wasn't much. It didn't show. It doesn't matter, it doesn't mean anything—
Yeonjun gazes back at you from the altar, that sweet, charming smile on his face. He looks like the epitome of the perfect husband—handsome, gentle, loving.
Loving.  
If only.
Your mother lets go of your arm. You both curtsy to the dowager duchess on her side, who smiles widely, and then she steps back to take her seat, leaving you to make the rest of the journey alone.
One step, two steps. The short distance up to the altar feels like it takes an eternity but once you're there, you wish it had taken longer. Heaving a silent, shaky breath, you turn to face Yeonjun.
The smile is still on your face.
Someone begins to read something, onerous and steady and sounding like utterly nothing as it passes through your head. Your fingers are sweaty and your gloves aren’t absorbent—you can feel the silk sliding against your palms as you try to readjust your grip on the bouquet, all the while staring into Yeonjun's eyes. His smile never falters.
Neither, you hope, does yours.
There's a pause in the reading. Someone appears with rings. You take one and Yeonjun takes the other. The words continue, pounding through your head, and try as you might, you can't understand a single one even though you can speak four languages—
“Do you, His Grace Yeonjun Choi, promise to take Y/N L/N to be your wife, to have and to hold from this day forward, for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish, until parted by death?”
Your heart stops. That part you can understand.
“I do.” Yeonjun's voice rings loud and clear, not a note of uncertainty in his tones. The two words echo in your ears long after he has slipped the ring onto your finger, even as the priest turns to you next.
“Do you, Miss L/N L/N, promise to take Yeonjun Choi to be your husband, to have and to hold from this day forward, for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish, until parted by death?”
Every eye in the room turns to you. It's like you're in the queen's hall again, about to step backward and ask your mother if that really just happened, if the queen really just named you her diamond, but where that happiness filled your heart in that moment, you can't name what you feel now.
Or maybe you just don't want to name it, for fear that you know what it is.
And that's when you realize.
You don't want this at all.
You don't want to marry Yeonjun. You don't want to tie yourself down to someone who can't promise to love you. You don't want to be married to someone who can't even promise to care for you in the way your father did your mother, the way your mother cared for your father—you don't want it, you don't want it, you don't want any of it at all—
But you promised. Even now you wear the ancestral engagement ring on your finger, pearls and diamonds that glint in the sunlight through the windows. You are engaged. You promised yourself to Yeonjun. You told him you wanted it, that you agreed with his opinions, that you wouldn't expect anything more of him when it came to your partnership.
You blink once, twice. Picture your mother and Sakura sitting in the pews. The two of them want this for you. The two of them need this from you.
And you know you would give your life for them, light yourself on fire for them, burn to ashes for them. It's why you studied for so many years, burnt the midnight oil hours after everyone had gone to bed to make yourself the best debutante who would ever grace society—it was for them. Always for them.
Slowly, even as it gets harder and harder to breathe, you swallow. Stand up straighter. Glance down at the flowers between your sweaty hands, then back up at the man to whom you're about to sign your life away.
Your voice rings out, clear and sweet, the way a diamond of the first water should speak. It doesn't tremble once. Doesn't falter at all.
“I do.”
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If you enjoyed, please don’t forget to reblog and leave a comment to tell me what you thought! Thank you for reading and have a lovely day <3
(1 reblog = 1 hug for mc. she’s kinda going through it)
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jungwnies · 2 years
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pairing : influencer!reader x idol!yeonjun
genre : social media au , fluff , crack , some written chapters , comedy, strangers to lovers au
featuring : itzy!chaeryeong , itzy!yeji , lesserafim!yunjin , aespa!winter , p1h!keeho , nct!chenle , enhypen!heeseung , skz!changbin , ateez!wooyoung
warnings : cursing , suggestive content (in some chapters)
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being an influencer has been a wonderful job, from promoting brands to interviewing idols for your youtube channel. everyone respected your relationships with idols as they saw how you were very respectful to those who came onto your channel. it was hard to avoid dating rumors because of how easygoing and real your videos were, but you never let those rumors effect how you really feel. that is until ….
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INDEX (completed)
profile one | profile two
1. prologue chapter 1 — ‛ that two month hiatus ‚
2. chapter two — ‛ beat the allegations ‚
3. chapter three— ‛ that was actually fun ‚
4. chapter four — ‛ quick replies are a green flag ‚
5. chapter five — ‛ bro he's flirtinggg ‚
6. chapter six — ‛ ayo hitman bang introduces hit it the second audition ‚
7. chapter seven — ‛ you have to sign the nda ‚
8. chapter eight — ‛ i think it's yeonjun you have to worry about ‚
9. chapter nine — ‛ just a nice guy ‚
10. chapter ten — ‛ you dated WHO? ‚
11. chapter eleven — ‛ well that's awkward ‚
12. chapter twelve — ‛ sit back and observe ‚
13. chapter thirteen — ‛ going thru a crisis ‚
14. chapter fourteen — ‛ what did yongbok do 😡 ‚
15. chapter fifteen — ‛ pretend it never happened ‚
16. chapter sixteen — ‛ this might be awkward ‚
17. chapter seventeen — ‛ the industry is in shambles ‚
18. chapter eighteen — ‛ the day has come ‚
19. chapter nineteen — ‛ what do you mean? ‚
20. chapter twenty — ‛ not the right guy ‚
21. chapter twenty one — ‛ quite compromising ‚
22. chapter twenty two — ‛ pee-are crisis ‚
23. chapter twenty three — ‛ it's up to her ‚
24. chapter twenty four — ‛ what needs to be done ‚
25. chapter twenty five — ‛ oh my fucking god ‚
26. chapter twenty six — ‛ black on black ‚
27. chapter twenty seven — ‛ friends to ??? ‚
28. chapter twenty eight — ‛ palpitations ‚
29. chapter twenty nine — ‛ settled ‚
30. chapter thirty — ‛ like a finale ‚
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started : 220617
ended : 230317
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gyuarchives · 9 months
Text
day & night | a choi yeonjun oneshot.
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sypnosis: Relationship or career? a pivotal decision that every successful person has to make someday. With a very promising career as a leader in the performance director team, Yeonjun takes a big leap in deciding that it would be best to leave the country, and you behind to expand his work. Was it the best decision? Of course not. But he hopes that someday, he can come running back to you and beg for forgiveness.
genre: angst, sad breakup, no happy ending (sorry), gn!reader
warnings: none i think!
word count: 1.4k words
note: inspired by Day and Night - Jung Seung Hwan (Start-up OST)! I recommend you listen to it while reading. You can also listen to Wave To Earth Songs like 'love.' and 'seasons' to fit the mood. see you at the end :)
y/n's pov
It was pouring on a Friday night. You looked below your window to watch young adults prancing around the street with their friends and loved ones, having the time of their lives as bars and clubs are starting to open their business for the night. You wished you could be there with your friends too, but here you are, too busy cooped up in your own little apartment, with the only heat that brought warmth to your aching, cold heart.
You sighed. Did you regret missing out on a fun night? Maybe. But it wasn't worth risking the likelihood of you getting pissed drunk wailing about how your ex-boyfriend broke up with you in the most meanest of ways.
'im sorry, im doing this for us.'
The last text he ever sent. To leave you behind. To leave the promising future of a young budding relationship behind.
Your cat pounced on your lap as you sat on the floor in between the couch and the coffee table.
"Jjunie baby, i'm sorry, I have to change your name soon. I hope you don't mind that. he won't be coming home anymore too. guess we are not good enough for him to stay.." you talked with 'jjunie', as you quietly start to tear up again.
Jjunie was your first cat you adopted with him. He claimed her as a promise ring to you; a promise that he wanted to grow old with Jjunie and you.
"Why my name? No no! It should be a combination of our name- y/n hey~!" he tried to convince and stop you from writing down the adopted cat's name as his nickname, as you saw that it deemed fit to name a cat. Of course, he couldn't stop the excited you from penning it down. He looked over at you with joy, and gratitude over how he got someone like you.
"I love you so much," he whispered just enough for himself to hear and mean it. Taking your free hand, rubbing it in reassurance that he had your back in whatever you wanted to do.
You loved every part of him; from his passion in pursing his career as leading his own performance team, his structured facial features, his talent in composing songs and covering songs just as good as the original artists, and more that would be just an endless list of reasons for why you never see yourself with anyone else but him.
Alas, he didn't feel the same when work interfered with the two of you.
"Can't we just please work it out? I'm sure there's something. Yeonjun, please."
"Y/n, I don't know how many times I have to tell you, but I have to go.. I can't leave this chance behind.. long-distance won't work on us.. just, make sure you stay healthy, yeah? don't forget about about jjunie.... bye, y/n."
He held you again one last time, embracing your warm hug that you were able to give him for the past 2 years together.
You couldn't stop him from pursuing his career and what he wants to do. So, there you were, alone. You decided to take out the vlog camera that you both shared to document the memories of 2 whole years when you were together. You started rolling.
"i can't say that I miss you, but everytime the feelings get overwhelming, you're there in my mind.. Is this a punishment for my wrongdoings? I'm sorry I pushed you away at times. I didn't mean to. Ha.. remember how we met? That Tuesday when I bumped into you in my favourite cafe. You ordered my favourite drink and sat at the window seat 2 years ago. You couldn't stop staring at me, you were so cute being so shy. That has yet to leave my mind as days passed. But the last time i saw you.. you looked at me, mellow…almost pale. I'm sorry if i wasn't enough. And thank you for everything. It was truly love, but at the wrong timing."
---
yeonjun's pov
"You alright?"
I looked away from the window, realising that I was still at the restaurant with my new dance team members.
"Yeah yeah, sorry, got a lot in my mind right now."
"That's alright man, relax a little! Come, let's drink tonight!"
I really don't want to.
Drinking used to be your favourite thing to do when you have nothing to do with your partner. Sometimes it might lead to a little more, but that's something you share personally with y/n.
Finally, after dreading the whole dinner, some had to be pulled out literally from their seats to get back home, but fortunately for you, they were all settled and the team members urged their team leader to go home; and so you did just that.
Empty. Quiet. Nothing but the sound of your shuffling footsteps to settle down in your new house for the next few years.
What's the point of having a house when I can't call it my home.
Sighing for the nth time, not caring if doing so will make your face get more wrinkles. You decided that maybe unpacking might be helpful to get your mind off of things. From the couch, you reached out for the nearest box, which became the most horrible decisions you have made, aside from breaking up from your most promising partner you ever had in your life.
The box was filled with things that symbolised every memory you shared with them. Pictures from dates you still vividly remember, because you cherish each time you get to meet the love of your life; cute plush toys that you used to win for each other. Rummaging through most of the things, your hand caught the most valuable item out of everything; a small box that held, an actual silver promise ring. You closed it quickly to avoid your tears from staining any part of the precious item, something you didn't get the chance to give before it all ended. You loudly sobbed in your own arms, feeling full of regret and guilt, wishing you didn't had to do that and stayed with them instead.
~
You came across your shared digital camera, that you bought with y/n to record your lives in your own perspective. Sometimes you two edit it and post it on YouTube for memories sake. And for the last time, you pressed the main button and recorded a parting message.
"Y/n, my beautiful lover. my person who shines so bright next to me. my person who was once everything to me. I am.. so sorry. Have you been well? Is Jjunie well? I hope he's eating a lot with you. It's been a few weeks and things still, hasn't changed. My performances are going well but, I can't help but miss you every fucking day.
Walking down the streets alone after burning the midnight oil reminds me of us walking home from classes during our school days, you complaining and ranting about your workload and being thankful about me being there with you. My side feels so cold now. Your hugs are the only thing that can warm me up like the sun on the last day of winter. You used to say I'm your teddy bear everytime. 'You really are my teddy bear. When I'm having a hard time, I can hug you, and you can hug me with your warmest hugs! You better not share it with anyone else!' Trust me y/n, I haven't been. I too have my hardships, but I choose not to tell you, for I worry more about you than anything else, including myself. Your hugs, cuddles, random acts of kindness even as small as giving me pieces of paper you tore from your notebook with words of encouragement on them, all of them gave me hope. If only you knew I still keep everything you gave me. I still order your favourite drink at cafes here, and sit at the window seat like you always loved. I somehow still smell you from some of my shirts. Even my things miss you too.
See this box? This box holds a secret that only I know. I hope one day, when I'm done, when I can finally hug you again once more, I can share the secret with you, and it will be ours. I know I left you abruptly, but please, if im not asking for much, please wait for me. This box and I, will wait for you too. I love you, y/n."
You stopped recording as tears continue to stream down your face.
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a/n: the ending sounds like i can continue from there...hm... but no promises! let me know how this story made you feel, any suggestions/requests, im happy to take them all~! thank you for reading &lt;;3
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