˚❀˚

the pogues take mario kart very seriously.

big john bought john b a wii when he was 10, and he and jj have been mastering the art of drifting and aiming shells since. spending at least part of the weekend stuck to the chateau’s small tv screen became mandatory. oftentimes, the crew would use a quick game to handle debates or disagreements.

“i’m tellin’ you. this plan is fool proof.” jj licks the inside of his lip, fixing his hat on his head for emphasis as he stares down a visibly unimpressed john b. “you don’t think goin’ in there—guns a-blazing—is gonna surprise ‘em?”

“i think they have plenty of guns to a-blaze at us, jj.” pope deadpans, pinching the bridge of his nose as he leans back on the porch bench. jj’s resolve doesn’t falter, he only shakes his head, looking between the other two boys.

“yeah—but that’s the thing—we’re faster, dude. i mean, you saw me at the beach, i was like—bow bow, bowbowbow..”

kiara bumps your arm, drawing you out of a daydream. you turn toward her, then follow her eyes to your blabbering boyfriend. “are you hearing this?”

you didn’t have to be listening to know his plan is absurd, but you shrug anyway. “i dunno, maybe he has a point.”

“sure..”

“y’know what, jj? i think we should settle this like men.” john b crosses his arms over his chest. “on the track.”

“guys—“ kiara starts, but jj cuts her off, pointing a confident finger at john b.

“you’re on.”

next thing you know, you’re sat on the couch inside, jj sitting beside you with a white knuckle grip on the wii controller steering wheel. he’s leaned forward, elbows on his knees in the most intense focus you’ve ever seen him in. they’re split screened, jj on the left and john b on the right, perfectly mirroring where they’re sitting on the couch. the ever so reliable john b chooses classic mario, and jj sticks to his routine choice, yoshi.

everyone’s eyes are glued to the tv screen, kiara leaning on the side of the couch, biting her nails anxiously, sarah sitting on the floor between john b’s legs, and pope sprawled across the leather armchair.

the boys are on their third lap, and it’s clear the competition is getting heated just looking at them. the first two laps were filled with shit talking and all around bad sportsmanship, but now they’re silent. neck and neck, they crash through the final round of item boxes, and the air stills as their respective power-ups shuffle.

“c’mon, c’mon.. big money..” jj mutters biting his lip. you’re enthralled, one hand resting supportively on his shoulder. with john b just a few paces in front of him, jj’s first power up loads as a red shell, and he immediately shoots it at john b. it hits him dead on, a cinematic slow-mo of mario’s go-kart sputtering to an explosive stop capturing the chaos of the room perfectly. jj springs to his feet, yoshi flying past john b’s defeated mario and through the finish line like a bullet.

“john b!” kiara shouts, hands flying to her forehead in utter shock as she watches jj cross the finish line in first. john b opens his arms in confusion, looking between everyone innocently. “what? he’s getting good! i mean—what d’you want me to do?”

“man, you threw that.” pope complains, hands wiping down his face as he grapples with the reality that is jj’s elaborate plan. john b can only brush them off, which is easy with jj shouting over all of them.

he’s already hooting and hollering. “yeah! yeaaah, that’s right, baby. don’t start sum you can’t finish.” he throws the controller down on the couch, coming back over to where you’re sitting and grabbing your hands, pulling you up to stand beside him. you can’t help but laugh, his elation infectious. he pulls you to his side like a trophy, pointing at john b in satisfaction. “s’why you don’t challenge papa j to a race, ‘les you wanna get owned.”

“i can count on one hand how many times you’ve won.”

“whatever, man, this time actually counts.” his hands roam down your side, gliding his fingers down the exposed skin below your crop top and he burrows his finger tips under the waistband of your shorts. “looks like today, papa’s in charge.”

“great.”

˚❀˚

Adventures in Goth Sitting Chapter 2: Getting to know your goths dark side.

Part one:

Pairing Bucky x Chubby Powered Female Original Character (Morticia)

Word Count: ~1900

Summary: A glimpse of power has Bucky taking things into his own hands, with a little bit of help.

Warnings: NSFW, Explicit sexual content, dubcon (to be safe), fingering, kinda Dark!Bucky, angst, cursing, drinking, fighting, under the influence of power

Two weeks had passed since the Jumping as I liked to refer to it. Things had, unfortunately and predictably, slipped back to normal. Bucky and I were floating on opposite sides of the universe.

He was sent for a mission three days after and Steve made a point to tell me about his lack of nightmares. ‘Hasn’t happened for more than a night in years, Morty.’

It has nothing to do with me. And that was a hill I’d happily die on.

I sat on the communal couch, legs propped up on Loki as we watched another episode of Goosebumps. Nostalgia was like heroin to the God of Mischief and he was loving this show so far. He’d prodded about my outing with the Soldier but after I smashed a purple tendril into the side of his face he shut up. We’d just fallen into another episode when the sudden silence of our room was shattered.

The doors to the elevator hissed open and out stepped three drunk, loud men. Bucky and Steve had unbuttoned their shirts and Sam had simply shed his. A flask hung off of Buckys belt loop and I laughed.

Turning to Loki, I questioned, “Did you give them that?” He smirked and shrugged,

“The good Capitan said they needed a “boys night” and he said liquor would help. I was simply, helping a friend.”

I smacked his arm and laughed. Mischief, always.

“Morticiaaaaaa!” Sang Steve. The bumbling blonde ran over to the couch and draped himself over the back leaning his head to the side to look at me.

“Show em your pets.” He said. My eyes went wide. Pets. No. He didn’t tell them.

“Yeah, show us your pets, living dead girl.” Sam joined. He hiccuped and gripped onto Buckys side for balance.

“No. Steve, they aren’t pets. They’re a part of me and they’re dangerous. I’m not whipping them out to entertain a bunch of sloshed old men.”

He pouted. Steve Rogers stuck his plump, pink bottom lip out and pouted like a child.

“Please? Well stay back. I told them how cool it looks. Like scary fireworks.”

I relented after several moments of staring at him all big eyes and sweet cheeks.

Loki grabbed my arm as I stood and shot me a look, making sure I was okay with this. I brushed him off gently and he begrudgingly let me go.

“Everyone has to step back and stay back. Steve was wrong,” I walked to the edge of the room near the windows, “they aren’t pets. They’re me.” I glanced at Loki, “Keep them back, please.” He nodded and went to stand, gathering Steve and pulling the other two back toward the other side of the space.

It was like riding a bike, truthfully. Calling my tendrils was just muscle memory, but their impact and power consumption was nothing to joke about. It comes from my chest, deep from within. A cold fire that burns through my very soul, then they come out to play. Long whisps of neon purple dance from my fingertips as they seek to feed.

“They aren’t pets. They feed on impurity, deviousness, and evil. They feed my power without taking a soul. But, arguably their impact is worse.” I let them sing and crawl through the air for a moment, not paying attention to the awestruck group watching. And then I killed them, closed my hands and shut it off. My body crumbled. I fell hard to the marble floor and heaved in as much air as I could. Bringing them out without feeding was too much.

Before I could think again I felt hands wrap around my jaw, tenderly. I looked up to see Loki and Bucky crouched by me, obvious concern etched onto their features.

“I’m okay. It’s just a lot.” I assured them. Bucky braced me against him as he helped me up. They both steadied me as I ambled to the couch.

“Are sure you’re okay, sweets?” Loki asked. He bent, pressing a kiss to my forehead and smoothing my hair. I nodded with a half smile.

“I am. Let me explain, though.” I readjusted on the cushions and pulled a pillow into my lap. Steve and Sam joined us, everyone taking a seat. Loki staying on the floor nearest to me, Bucky on the couch beside me as well.

“I call them tendrils or chicken tenders. They help me when I need it most. They protect me and my abilities and allow me to coax what I need from who I need it. I don’t use them often as they leave the person, empty of all joy and hope. All goodness. I suck out and power their darkest depths at the same time. The tendrils turn them into living buffets of dark energy. Conscience be damned.”

“Do they take a lot out of you?” Sam asked.

“Only if I don’t feed them when they’re pulled out. Like, just now.”

I could see regret and embarrassment cross Steve’s face and he immediately stuttered an apology.

I shook my head, “Its okay. I won’t do it again but at least now if I have to use them in the field you know what they are. I don’t wanna see any of you get hurt because of me.”

I woke the next morning later than usual, having sent a notification to Natasha i would miss our morning session. It was mid afternoon before I emerged from my cave. Dressed in black skinny jeans and a Blackcraft crop top, paired with my black and white converse, I felt confident and cute. I always took the extra time for self care after energy drains, otherwise I’d be a complete bitch. The sun was bright through the windows in the common area, Sam sat at the bar talking to his sister on FaceTime. Scott and Natasha were battling it out on Mario Kart for the last piece of coffee cake and Bucky, Bucky snuck up on me.

He grabbed my hips from behind and yelled my name and I screamed, loud. A burst of purple flared out of my body and I made myself as small as possible. The room clattered to a halt. Natasha booked it to me and pushed Bucky away.

Bucky was just as startled. His chest heaved as the purple mist seeped into his skin. He cold feel cold begin to work it’s way up his spine and he shivered.

“Nat, get Bucky out of here.” I growled. She nodded and began to push the solider from the room. He relented, planting his feet with a horrifying grin.

“I want her.” He snarled. Buckys eyes bore straight through me. The normal glassy seas were tormented by black and purple pulses as the poison sunk into him fully and worked its way through his body.

Natasha shook her head, “Not a chance, big boy. Time to go to your room.” She shoved at him again and Bucky chuckled. He grabbed her wrist and twisted her arm, Natasha grunted.

He muttered to her in Russian and threw her down. Bucky began to stride towards me. My heart raced in my chest as I scrambled backwards. This stride was so much like the one I saw that day when we jumped. My pussy clinched at the thought. He snatched a fistful of my hair and drug me up, pain shot through my skull as I struggled, “Walk.” Bucky shoved me forward and I moved. I wasn’t fighting him. Something in me was screaming at me not to. He marched me to his room, ignoring the screaming of Natasha for Steve to “come get his guard dog before he’s out down.”

His bedroom doors opened much too slowly and he shoved me inside. My palms were sweaty with anticipation and I felt the ache between my legs only grow.

“What. Did. You. Do. To. Me?” Bucky rasped.

“You really scared me. It was an accident. I swear. I would nev…”

“I said, what did you do to me? I won’t ask a third time, doll.”

“It’s like my tendrils but it’s way toned down. It’s like a sparkler compared to a full firework. It uh…enhances darker ambitions and lowers inhibitions.”

Buckys fists clenched tightly at his sides and he huffed.

“Are you okay, Bucky?” I asked timidly. I took a step towards him only for him to step back abruptly.

“Do you wanna know why I stay the fuck away from you?” He asked, not looking up, “it’s because if I don’t, I’m going to fuck that soft body through my mattress and yours. I’m going to ruin you and break you and fucking demolish every single piece of you. And then, I’m gonna stitch you back together and do it again. Forever. Like, my own little toy.”

Holy shit. My breath stopped. Bucky turned to me and tilted his head,

“Oh, doll…you want that don’t you?” He mocked me. Bucky stepped closer and snatched me, flipping me around crushing my back to his body. His metal fingertips bruised at my sides as he ground me into his crotch. His flesh hand wrapped around my throat and tightened. I felt his hard cock beneath his jeans and moaned.

Fuck. I was gonna cave. So hard.

He smirked against my neck and tightened his grip on my hip.

“My little, dirty girl. You want this. You’ve wanted this. Haven’t you?”

I nodded as best as I could beneath his hand.

“Ya know, we didn’t have girls like you back in the day. Not often. And I find, that all you cute, big tittied goth girls -learned that phrase recently - have these lovely Daddy issues. That’s my favorite. I like the little clothes, the black lips, the attitude. But, most of all, I love how fucking wrecked you look when someone finally puts you in your place.”

His metal hand creeped to my jeans button and popped it open, sliding down my zipper. Buckys fingers dug beneath my panties and he cupped my pussy. He growled, squeezing just a bit.

“And chubby girls, god, your pussies are so soft and always so wet. Fuck. I’m mad at myself for shooting down a couple of dames when I was in the army now. If I had known about this,” his fingers slid through my obscene wetness, “I would have said yes. Plus, you’re the best cuddling partners.”

I could be mad at him for half fetishizing my body type and telling me he had a “no fat chicks” rule previously, but people grow. And with his fingers circling my clit edging me closer to orgasm, I could certainly say he was growing on me. Bucky drug his fingers from between my trembling thighs and stuffed them in my mouth roughly. He loosened his grip off my neck and groaned. I felt his cock twitch against my ass.

“God, such a good girl.” He praised.

“Time to be a bad girl though, you think you can do that?”

Bucky asked, kissing my neck and sucking a mark onto the skin.

“Yes, Sir.” I replied, with a dazed smile.

I hate this

I hate this : Memes

your passport photo and copy of passport At my school, the homework was to color the picture. So very true... In my school it’s so bad, the teacher projects it on the whiteboard ah, nightmares Soo true XD They say that because you cropped it out. And that is a fact They use plotters I get it! Lol that’s good shit Im sory Toad The homework that steals your time and your lunch money 99% of sane teachers shows u the color image on smart board No teachers want to show u crappy print Just understand it. Color printer is expensive. You’re telling me that teachers give out free black children? Bet, already got three in the basement itsa me, Noir-io Facts tho It'sa me, a-Copyo! We all make mistakes in the heat of passion, Jimbo. Come back in ten years And they pop in a “do you see the ... in the picture” question Why mario on the right looks like he's about to wake me up at 3 am saying with deep demonic voice It's time for me to turn you into my spaghetti Is this the new "We have ____ at home" ? Since im in school this is to relatable The math graphs were the worst though 30 years of saving princesses, 30 years of smashing brown mushrooms. And for what? Cake? Mario!? Why does this remind me of the fearsome Llapp Goch Master. There's a good chance this is unique! I checked 103,921,185 image posts and didn't find a close match Whenever I got bad copies I'd always split the best copies around the room so every student was at least near a good copy and keep a bad one for myself... Remember when you were the chosen one to go out of class and get em papers wonderful If Mario was in Papers, Please AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA printer companies: see you little shits? this is why your printer needs colored cartridges! My name is paublo Yes Is that pablo It's supposed to be not centered Based on a true story Itsa me, Marijuanio! he looks so sad:( NVM took a secound look he looks like he bout to ask me if i wanna buy WEEEEEEEEEEEEEDDD Kinda looks like Hitler though Noah get the Death Star. My kindergarten teacher wife has to print shit at home for this reason. Effectively costs $300/year in paper/ink and another $100 to replace whatever broken down color ink printer we have in a given year. I want her to transition to laser, but haven't been able to convince her. More like the board of Education, principal and superintendents wanting another raise so the kids get B&W copies. At our large school we have 1 color copier, the rest are black and white. More often than not, kids are not getting color copies. Budget. Why is this too true Don't you be knocking LaserJet. Those things were a tank whose toner lasted a long time. DeskJet is what you are looking for. Made with HP LaserJet 100 color MFP Same Mario on the right side looks like sleep paralysis demon, ngl. Mario and Noireio. Top 10 hollywood stars ruined by drug addiction. It looks like if he ran into me he'd try to stuff me into an animatronic suit where I belong Mario looks like he's going to go on a mugging spree Too true Me looking at my paper: HERE WE GOOOO One more gram common u can do it is fentanyl the new drug to go? i only appy the fentanyl patches on them cancer patients at work, so they don't suffer 24/7. a couple of months ago there was a problem at our elderly home, bc some crazies tried to dig them used patches out of our trash..have fun with patches which are covered in shit and piss You should have done 64 or 69 Bro youd die before you even got through half a gram of fentanyl wtf do you even know what fentanyl is lmao A true epic gamer moment God I wish I had some pure fent Issa me, Black tar heroin Mario! Come with me and meet my gang of druga dealers! I really Was expecting a rickroll lmao And this is probably what he's listening to on his alone time https://youtu.be/ijBrulQXE2U It me mrio I jst snrted one mre grm and I jst deid DO IT FOR THE GRAM Go ahead and do another gram just one more gram Legendary The homework that steals your time and your lunch money............... Luigi says: do the coke to get the smoke Betta tell your moms your dads your ministers... WOOOMP WOOOMP WOOOMP!!!! Justa what me the Doctor Mario prescribed Mama mia I a need a more of that a shit YAHOOOOOO!!!! And remember kids - when you do drugs, you go to hell before you die! It’s a me druggooo Mario! I have snorted 68 grams of pure fentanyl and I am going to die. Itsame itsame I’m literally studying for an exam right now and my professor put that on his own notes... like bro nobody gives a shit about your stats notes I had a professor just say “don’t waste your money on the book. Just google book name pdf and it should be the first link.” Then he did in in class go show us And then you have the ones that sell their own 40 page notes in 2 sections for €20 each at the college book store. Or the ones that make class notes and give them out in the first class. Even better are the ones that accidentally send a pdf of their own book that they make no money on due to a shitty publisher to one or two people in the class. my favorite kinds of professors A full commitment is what I'm thinking of A lot of emulators come with a warning like "Use a bios file from your own console. Do not download one for free from the Internet!" I saw something on TIL a while back, during the prohibition era of the United States, some companies sold grape concentrate. They had a warning on them that said something to the effect of "after adding the concentrate to water, do not let it sit for two weeks as it will ferment into wine." As if...they wanted you to do it! That's a pretty calculated statement for them to make. *mobile errors I had calculus profs who would tell us 'I legally cannot advise you to steal copywrited material so under no circumstances should you go to this website and torrent the textbook for free instead of buying it from the overpriced book store and wasting your money' I always love those blank pages that just have in like size i font "Do not write here" for no fucking reason. Then the teacher tells you that they didn't see it I like when it’s in huge, WHITE print in the middle of the fucking page so half the assignment is cut off I like when it says on the side of the paper COPYRIGHTED MATERIAL DO NOT PHOTOCOPY OR DISTRIBUTE BY ANY MEANS Or the "here's a form that was made in Excel, if you could fill it out so that we can input the information back in Excel that would be great." "yeah..." "But the image gets worse!" Work in Japan. Teachers give me a copied paper. "just copy it. They have the file on their damn computer. Which is where we are sitting. -20 points. I can’t even read the damn question At my school, we get lectured for printing a class set rather than just a master. They say it’s about toner being cheaper and the copier cartridges are much much bigger. There are also a lot of places where teachers don't have access to a shared laser printer like that and don't have any option but to make photocopies, so stuff like the OP can be unavoidable sometimes. Genuinely not a problem in my school - we have a fleet of MFDs for bulk printing. We have an admin assistant in charge of the reprographics room who can interrupt jobs if needed as well. It's just an old mindset that they can't get out of. Yeah but then you have to be the asshole that released a print job with 200+ pages while others are waiting to use the copier since this is the only one you can print to. What is full sending? huzzah, a man of quality Have you tried full sending it? From an IT perspective, usually it's not that they want you to know what triggered the problem, they want you to provide concise information on what exactly you were doing up until the issue occurred. Though I do understand that IT technicians are notoriously unsociable lol I'm sure thats a great suggestion but that's the thing is that IT acts like its up to the enduser to already know whats causing the issues and what needs to be done to fix it. Also this doesn't solve his/her issue of getting staples on the copies. Have your IT reinstall your driver and you can select the options that your printer has. likely you are on a global driver, or it wasn't installed correctly! Or if I want staples. We can only select staples on our copier itself. It would be easier if the print queue thing was reliable. But I can't keep running back to my room if it didn't send it, so I make extra copies from my first one. Or if I need front/back from different originals I work in IT support for a school - teachers, for some fucking reason beyond my understanding, seem to print one copy of something, then photocopy it for their classes. Telling them that just printing it for everyone keeps the quality better doesn't sink in. It costs the same, comes out of the same device, and it's less work, but I'm the insane one. Th s rin er se ms o æ run ing lo n ink To the knee And my axe! And my sword! Take mine too! Fuck off take a useless arrow Actually it seems this printer is low on incas. Damn u incas "I'm so sorry kids, our ancient printer is not working properly again" Read the full article

1-50 for the ask game and I'm not sorry. ✨

WYV ILY 

ALSO TAGGING MY GF BC IM GAY @perfect-murderer

Under a read more bc long post 

1. Wake her up with kisses lesbian or play with her hair while you wait for her to wake up lesbian- Wake her up (wake her up inside) can’t wake up (wake her up inside) SMOOCH HER

2. X files lesbian or twin peaks lesbian- X-Files, I’ve always been gay for Scully

3. Pit Bull lesbian or corgi lesbian- I’ve never though about this but corgis! they look so happy and small!

4. Sweet tooth lesbian or saturates-everything-in-hot sauce lesbian- I can’t stand spice and I love sweet stuff (like my gf...and lemon candy)

5. Sunflower lesbian or white lily lesbian- As much as I love lily gay symbolism, sunflowers

6. Rose gold lesbian or white gold lesbian- this hit that ice cold I actually prefer rose gold

7. Dunkin’ donuts/Starbucks lesbian or strictly local cafe lesbian- I’ve never had Dunkin Donuts/Starbucks so cafe!

8. Sunrise lesbian or sunset lesbian- Sunsets, they also tend to be the best time to go crab catching~

9. Emily Dickinson lesbian or maya Angelou lesbian- I THINK EMILY DICKINSON (IS A LESBIAN)

10. Dark sexy ball gown or cute bright ball gown lesbian- depends...if the dark one shows too much skin (I tend to not like showing skin personally) then bright, but I love a dark dress as much as anyone!

11. Strawberry lesbian or watermelon lesbian- Watermelon lesbian all the way, though nutella dipped strawberries...

12. High waisted shorts lesbian or loose rolled up jeans lesbian- Loose jeans...I’m too ‘thicc’ and too short for any jeans to fit me comfortably tbh

13. 60s chic lesbian or 60s hippie lesbian- chic

14. Band lesbian or orchestra lesbian- NO THIS IS SO HARD I MEAN...WELL I DON’T PLAY BRASS SO ORCHESTRA BUT I PLAY TUNE PRECUSSION SO BAND BUT I LOVE BOTH BUT I LOVE BIG BAND STUFF BUT I LOVE ORCHESTRA I’M JUST A MUSIC HOE BLEASE I mean prob band

15. Choir lesbian or garage band lesbian- Garage band, most of the choir girls who’ve I’ve had crushes on turned out to be homophobic :/

16. Twirl her around lesbian or get twirled lesbian- TWIRL HER TWIRL HER TWIRL HER but like, if there’s a dip I’m fuckinG DIPPING BUT I LEAD OKAY EVEN IF I’M TERRIBLE 

17. Sit com lesbian or artsy independent dramatic romance film from France lesbian- I like the ‘gal pal’ sweet lesbians but they’re both paired up with guys sadly (COUGH COUGH PARKS AND REC) so probably dramatic? I’m a drama loving bitch

18. Bicycle lesbian or bus lesbian- Mike on his bike and bus lesbian is wlw mlm solidarity (blease ask me about the legend that is Mike) but yeah sadly bus lesbian, I can’t ride a bike and whenever I do I hum the HGSS bike theme and fall. Trains and ships are better

19. Jelly fish lesbian or dolphin lesbian- Jellyfish!!! BUT CRABS ARE PRIME!

20. Biology lesbian or physics lesbian- Biology lesbian by far, gimme that gay bats and crabs and sexual mitochondriac tension

21. Studio Ghibli lesbian or Cartoon Network lesbian- As much as I love SU and OK KO and whatnot, I gotta go with Ghibli (is there a gay Ghibli movie? blease say)

22. Take the spider outside lesbian or scream at her to take the spider outside lesbian- take the spider outside! I always do that, even if I’m scared

23. Serena Williams lesbian or Ronda Rousey lesbian- Serena...those muscles...those legs...she’s absolutely gorgeous

24. Prismacolor lesbian or faber castell lesbian- Faber Castle always, though I have gotten Prismacolor for birthdays and they’re high quality it always seems too...elite for me

25. “Campers are for the weak” lesbian or “I will die before sleeping on the ground” lesbian- Campers are for the weak, but use a damn sleeping bag and tent yo

26. Calling every female character they see their girlfriend lesbian or “Dana Scully isn’t your girlfriend, I am” lesbian- SCULLY I’M GAY but the latter, I wouldn’t want any character to actually date me they should date each other

27. Roller skate lesbian or ice skate lesbian- when I was a wee bean roller skates but like...I always used to fall. So Ice Skates? No yoi but like it’s cold and cute and lowkey holding my gf so she doesn’t trip more like clinging onto her legs as I do the splits and break all my bones

28. “Christmas carols are dumb and over played” lesbian or belting out all I want for Christmas is you at the top of their lungs lesbian- Dumb and overplayed, I will listen to my gf and join her but like,,,tragic shopaholic mother backstories,,,always, always playing, always there. 

29. Buy her something lesbian or make her something lesbian- depends, I love making things but I have like, no dexterity so probably buy?

30. Cherry mojitos lesbian or cherry flavored vodka lesbian- ...I must betray the rat bois...but mojitos. I hate mint but it’s so fucking ~*fresh*~ (I don’t drink but I’ve made ‘mocktails’)

31. Write her poems lesbian or bake her cookies lesbian- Y’ALL ALREADY KNOW I’M A GAY ASS POET MY MAJOR ENGLISH WORK IS LITERALLY GAY POEMS BASED OFF FLOWERS

32. Tummy kisses lesbian or thigh kisses lesbian- t...thigh kisses....////

33. I’ll fight anyone that makes my girl cry lesbian or I’ll psychologically destroy anyone that makes my girl cry lesbian- Both, nemo impune lassit bitch- Edgar Allen Poe

34. Fall asleep in her arms lesbian or rub her back until she falls asleep in your arms lesbian- rub her back until she falls asleep in your arms

35. Floral pattern lesbian or tie dye lesbian- floral pattern, love those rainbows but plants dude,,,

36. Snake lesbian or frog lesbian- *tries not to make a kanako/suwako reference* Snakes, they blep, as much as I love memes. 

37. Send her memes lesbian or “if you call me the rarest Pepe one more time I swear to god”- SEND HER MEMES SEND HER MEMES I WANT TO NUT (Never leave her Unconditionally love her Treat her right)

38. Star Wars lesbian or lord of the rings lesbian- Star Wars, i’m not hugely into either but star wars

39. Spice girls lesbian or 5th harmony lesbian- no clue,,, but probably 5th harmony?

40. Pink hair lesbian or blue hair lesbian- depends, light cotton candy pink but on someone else blue (gimme that dark or lilac purple any gay tho)

41. Maple syrup lesbian or berry syrup lesbian-Maple syrup slorp slorp slorp

42. Vinyl lesbian or cassette lesbian- Vinyl? 

43. Paris lesbian or Amsterdam lesbian- never been to Amsterdam so probably Amsterdam? 

44. Jazz lesbian or swing lesbian- hHHhHHhHHHhhHhH DONT MAKE ME CHOOSe I LoVE THEM BOTH oKAY????

45. Pin stripes lesbian or plaid lesbian- Pin stripes forever, flannel looks good on other people but not my thing

46. Mini golf date lesbian or bowling date lesbian- bowling because there’s usually an arcade and snacks! I usually enjoy the shoot em ups and pinball and I’ll fuking destroy at air hockey and cause copious collateral damage, but mini golf is senseless whacking destruction so if there’s no security cameras mini golf

47. D E S T R O Y her at Mario kart lesbian or let her win lesbian- try but end up losing, but at least I have the cutest character-cart combo

48. Pullover hoodie lesbian or zip up hoodie lesbian- Zip ups forever, but like, not those shitty half crop top zip up shit, gimme an actual hoodie you heathens

49. Band tshirt lesbian or fandom tshirt lesbian- I got pokemon t-shirts so fandom?

50. Love her with your entire heart lesbian or lover her with your entire soul lesbian- uhhh both??? If souls are actual things then souls, bc giving someone your blood pumper would be messy, and I’m a gay ass demon