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#ya girl got drunk at dinner oops lol
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Tequila (Jack Fanfic)
Title: Tequila
Characters: Jack x Reader, Dean, Sam, Cass
Word Count: 3450
Warning: ALMOST smut but not, Under-aged Drinking, Teasing, Breaking Dean’s rules, awful singing, and Idk. I’m bad at warnings.
A/N: As I wrote this, it was nearing towards smut but I felt that it was too soon to taint Jack. LOL. If you were hopping to read some Jack smut, maybe in the future. But at least you got some Jack tease? Idk. Anyways, I hope you like it! Hit me up with an ask if you do!
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It was time for Sam and Dean to head out for their hunt. Sam had explained to you that this was an opportunity to have Dean get his mind off of things with just the two of them working a case like old times. As much as you hated being left behind, you understood completely. They needed this – Dean needed this, but that didn’t mean you weren’t bitter about staying back. That left you to babysit Jack, which was not on your bucket list of things to do.  
“Why can’t we just invite Donatello over and he can watch the kid!” You grumbled. “I could help with the case and it could be the three of us like old times.”
“Y/N, we went over this. Besides, you’re just as young as Jack. Just by looking at you two, everyone would assume that Jack was older,” Sam pointed out.
You scowled at him desperately racking your brain for some sort of excuse to deny that you appeared the youngest, but you were failing miserably. “Rude,” you hissed before turning away and heading to the kitchen for some comfort food. Sam couldn’t help but chuckle at your behavior. You were such a kid. You were like their younger sister and they treated you as such.
Sam and Dean were long gone on their hunt. The first night alone with Jack was pretty laid back. The both of you had lunch and dinner together, even watched the entire season one and two of Stranger Things. It really wasn’t so bad, but your pride had been provoked when they decided to leave you out.
It was day two and you noticed that the bunker had been unusually quiet and that you hadn’t run into Jack for sometime. Panic ensued thinking that he could have snuck out of the bunker, or worse, opened the door to an alternate universe and got lost. You hurried off to his room only to find him glued to Sam’s laptop. You rolled your eyes at the sight, knowing that you had nothing to worry about.
With the knowledge of knowing Jack was safe and sound, and still bitter about being left behind (you knew you were being petty but you didn’t care at the moment), you decided to have a drink to drown all your frustrations. You had watched Dean and Sam do it multiple times. They had never allowed you to drink, not because you were underage, but because they knew first hand that you were a lightweight.
You had gotten yourself in a little situation with Crowley once, who had given you a drink, which you gladly accepted thinking it was such an adult thing to do. Two shots of whiskey later, you were a blubbering, giggling, fool. You had given Crowley all of the information he needed. Dean was pissed and carried you back to the motel that night. He forbade you to never have a drink ever again, not wanting you to do anything stupid or get yourself into trouble.
Well, with the “big brothers” away, Y/N gets to play… with alcohol.
You rummaged through the liquor cabinet noticing there were more than one kind of alcohol. Whiskey, vodka, tequila, gin, rum, and other names that you had never heard of before. You picked the tequila just because it was in a pretty bottle. You grabbed a glass and brought them to the table, excitement coursing through you. There was a rush of adrenaline knowing you were breaking the rules… Dean’s rules.
When you popped open the bottle you could immediately smell the strong scent of the liquid. You scrunched up your nose, detesting the smell. “How the hell do they drink this stuff?” You cringed to yourself. Shrugging it off, you poured yourself a drink all the way to the top of the glass.
You stared at the clear beverage, hesitating if you should go through with this or not. The fact that you were a lightweight was something you accepted because it was downright true. You didn’t quite trust yourself, but then again, you were in the safety of the bunker and there was no where to go. What was the worst that could happen?
With pure determination, you downed the drink as quick as you could. That was how Dean had done it when he wanted to let loose. You resisted the need to stop as the liquid fire burned your throat. A guttural hiss and groan, dramatically, leaving your lips. It tasted awful.
Heat instantaneously consumed you, unquestionably feeling the effects of the alcohol. You giggled at the thought that you’d be in tremendous trouble if Dean and Sam found out. Out of spite, you filled your cup to the brim once again.
“Tequila…” you rose your glass, “…is tryin’ ‘ta kill ya!’” You finished, giggling like a high school girl, before taking a large gulp, hissing at the feel of it running down your throat. “Oh yeah, this’ll try to kill ya,” you slurred, chuckling at yourself. At this point you were feeling good. You sat at the table forcing yourself to finish your second cup, your eyes focusing on nothing but thin air. Abruptly, you shouted, “I need music! A party surly needs music!”
Stumbling to your feet, you shuffled towards the record player, surprised that you were able to turn it on before letting the pin drop. Pat Benatar’s ‘Hit Me with Your Best Shot’ filled the room as you shamelessly and obnoxiously sang along, swaying your hips and twirling your body with the beat. If anyone was watching, they’d think you were hallucinating, as if you trying to keep your balance on a viciously swaying ship.
“Well, you’re a real tough cookie with a long history! Breaking little hearts like the one in me!” You sang out loud, living in the moment, whipping your hair all over the place.
You downed the drink in your hands and slammed it on the table, relishing the feel of the alcohol overtaking your entire being. It was official, you were drunk and you didn’t care. The room felt a little topsy-turvy, as side affect that you were finding amusing. You giggled while you sang and fumbled around in the room, bumping into the tables, chairs, and anything that happened to be in your way.
“Hit me with your best shot! Why don’t you hit me with your best shot! Hit me with your best shot, fire away! WOO!” You twirled your body, the world around you practically flipping upside down as you felt your body follow suit.
Unexpectedly, arms were around you waist keeping you balanced. “Y/N, are you okay?” It was Jack’s voice. A wide grin appeared on your lips as you swiveled around in his hold, now facing him.
“Hey Jacky,” you snickered, wrapping your arms securely around his neck. His cheeks grew red as he observed you with confusion.
“Are you alright?” He asked again.
“Oh, I feel magnificent!” You giggled, tugging him closer so that he was pressed against you. You could sense his body stiffen at the sudden proximity which gave you a bit of satisfaction. “Dance with me,” you ordered, swaying your body against his.
Jack froze, unsure what was happening and what to do. You were flush against him, gyrating your body sensually against his. He was growing nervous quickly as strange emotions began to creep their way through his body. He didn’t understand them, but he was beginning to feel uncomfortable, as if he couldn’t trust himself for some reason.
“Maybe we should stop,” Jack suggested, feeling a tingling coursing through his every nerve.
“What? But we only just started,” you moaned into his ear, your hot breath sending a foreign sensation straight to his private area.
“Uh, I don’t think that’s a good idea,” he stammered, slightly loosening your hold on him.
“Why not? Dancing is fun,” you laughed, taking his large hands in yours and placing them on the small of your back. “Just let the music control you.” Jack felt something controlling him but he was sure that it wasn’t the music.
“I really think we shouldn’t be doing this,” he deadpanned. He didn’t trust himself and the new emotions that were stirring within him. He was worried that what he was feeling could hurt her. Sam and Dean were not around to enlighten him on the changes he was going through, and he couldn’t talk to you considering you were the reason for all this frustration. Not to mention you were not yourself.
“Jacky, you just need to get on my level,” you slurred before pulling away from him. You wobbled over to the tequila bottle and poured him a cup, some of the contents spilling over the table. “Oops,” you chuckled. “Here, have some!” You chirped.
Jack made his way next to you, eyeing the mysterious drink. “What is it?”
“It’s what’s gonna get you feeling loose, baby!” You cheered, your body softly grooving to the music once again. Jack’s eyes settled on your seductive dance, his eyes greedily watching you. “C’mon Jack, join me,” you cooed.
Like an obedient guy, he didn’t seem any harm in a drink, and gulped it down, grunting at the sting. “Whoa, what is that?” He asked, still cringing at the aftertaste.
“What does it matter, aren’t you feeling good?” You smiled, grabbing the bottle off the table and taking a swig. After placing the bottle down, you allowed the music to over take you once again while Jack just stood there watching.
He decided to take another drink, filling it to the top like he had seen you do, before tanking the liquid one time. His body shook at the burning sensation, feeling the sudden change in himself. He had never felt this way before either. He began to heat up, feeling uncomfortable in his clothes, so he stripped out of his shirt, lying it on the table. “It’s hot in here,” he declared.
“Woo!” You whistled, laughing and enjoying yourself. Jack smiled enjoying the light atmosphere in the room. He had never been so relaxed before. “Dance with me!” You shouted over the music.
“I don’t know how,” Jack chuckled, walking up next to you.
“Just let the music move your body. Don’t think too much about it. Have fun!” You hopped with the beat. “Hit me with your best shot!” You started singing again.
A few songs later, Jack took a seat, as sweat rolled down the side of his face and chest. You bit your bottom lip enjoying the view. “It’s really hot in here,” he commented.
“Yes it is,” you eyed his figure up and down. You never really took the time to appreciate that Jack was extremely handsome. If you didn’t know any better, you would think that he was really a Winchester, a family with nothing but Godly genes.
You made your way over to him, making yourself comfortable in his lap. He looked up at you with curiosity. “What are you doing? I am not a chair,” he mumbled.
“But it’s more comfortable here,” you whimpered, wrapping your arms around his neck and hovering your lips dangerously close to his. “Do you not like it?” You questioned, your voice soft and suggestive.
“U-uh, I, I d-don’t kn-ow,” he stuttered, his eyes glued on to your soft lips.
“Oh, but I think you do,” you grinded your butt over his crotch. Jack shut his eyes, grunting at the new sensation. “See,” you giggled, licking his lips like a kitten. Jack shuddered, letting out a deep breath, his body reacting on it’s own. “You’re all hard for me,” your voice was lower, your eyes dark with lust for the Nephilim in front of you.
“That drink we drank, is that some sort of poison? Like magic that’s making us act like this?” Jack growled, trying to contain himself as much as he could. Although he was feeling a little disoriented, he knew what was going on. He knew what he was doing and he didn’t want to do anything that would hurt you. You on the other hand wouldn’t remember a thing in the morning.
“You could say that,” you sniggered before covering your lips over his.
You felt Jack’s body flinch and then stiffen under your action. He felt like he was frozen. When he didn’t respond, you pulled away observing his expressions and behavior, wondering if he was going to push you away, but he didn’t. He just stared into your eyes, chest heaving up and down from the loss of air. You couldn’t help the gratification building inside you and connected your lips with his again, this time letting your tongue join the party.
You felt Jack wince beneath you again as your tongue swirled around his, searching his mouth, not leaving a single space left untouched. You could tell that Jack was beginning to relax, his hands naturally making their way to your hips, gripping them tightly. His lips were now moving in tandem with yours, savoring the new feel.
When you pulled back for air, Jack’s hair was a mess, his eyes were clouded, and his lips were swollen. “Having fun?” you questioned, a smug expression plastered proudly on your face.
Jack didn’t say anything, only nodding in affirmation. He was too winded and his mind was hazy. He had never felt anything so wonderful before. The things he felt were all new and he didn’t hate it. In fact, he loved it. He wanted to do it again. He wanted to feel your lips on his and he wanted to feel your tongue dance with his again and again.
Catching you off guard, he pulled you back in, his lips crashing into yours feverishly. It was his tongue this time invading your wet cavern, tasting every inch of your mouth. You moaned into the kiss enjoying the moment. Your hands were tangled in his hair as his found their way under the hem of your shirt, massaging the flesh of your hips and lower back. His hands were warm against your skin and yours were hot against his.
You started to ground your hips against his, earning a low growl from deep within his throat. Without mercy, you continued your ministrations, feeling Jack harden beneath you. “Wh-what’s happening?” Jack stammered, pulling his lips away from your, saliva stringing from both your lips.
“It’s normal. You’re just horny,” you explained.
“H-horny?” He stuttered as you rubbed your core against the apparent tent in his pants.
“Aroused, stimulated, hard, turned on, eager, hungry,” you breathed against his ear, using other words to explain the situation.
“I-I think we sh-should take a break,” Jack’s hands fell from your body, causing you to groan in frustration.
You pulled back to give him some room to breath, but you remained on his lap. You reached for the neglected bottle of poison and chugged a few good slugs in. At this point, it tasted like water and you were enjoying the feeling of it.
“It’s way too hot in here,” you complained, reaching for the hem of your shirt and slowly peeling the fabric off your body, setting it next to Jacks.
“Wow.” Jack’s eyes shamelessly scanned your body. You were beautiful. Your skin looked as soft as it felt, and your body was definitely much more different than his. His eyes settled at the swell of your breasts, as they were held up by black lace.
“Since you need some time to cool down, let’s dance some more!” You wiggled off of Jack’s lap. When you stood, you lost your balance falling towards Jack. You threw your hands forward, landing them on the arms of the chair all the while Jack attempted to catch you, his hands pressed up against your breasts. He made a mental note about how soft they were, but looked up at you with apprehension.
“S-sorry,” Jack retreated his hands reluctantly.
“It’s okay,” you smirked.
“It’s getting late, maybe we should get ready for bed. Dean and Sam will be home soon,” he stated, grabbing his shirt and pulling it on.
“Ugh, those guys. Who cares about Ken and Fabio!” You bellowed, grabbing the bottle of tequila in your hands. “They left us!” You shouted before taking a sip.
“Who is Ken and Fabio?” Jack tilted his head in bewilderment.
“You know, the Ken doll and that romance novel guy with the long hair?” You muddled. Jack just gave you a lost look which indicated that he had no clue what the hell you were talking about. “Oh Jacky, you’ll understand sooner or later.” Taking another gulp, you set the bottle back down on the table, and took a seat beside Jack. “Ugh, the room won’t stop spinning,” you droned.
Jack grabbed your shirt and did his best to help you put it back on. When he finally managed to do so, a wave of accomplishment washed over him. He then stood from his seat, watching you scattered on the chair and table.
“I think I’m drunk,” you laughed, your eyes half lidded.
“Drunk?”
“Mhmm. I need water.”
Jack left quickly, returning with a glass of water. He set it in front of you. When he noticed you not doing anything, he did what his instincts were telling him to do. He lifted the glass and helped you sit up straight before bringing the water to your lips. The feel of the cool liquid soothing your throat. When you had drunk all the water, Jack picked you up bridal style and carried you into your room, like he’d seen Sam and Dean do when you’d fall asleep in Sam’s room from watching movies.
He placed you on the bed but you wouldn’t unravel your arms from his neck. “Don’t leave me,” you pouted.
“Y/N, Dean said that I wasn’t allowed in here,” Jack stated.
“Then take me back to your room.”
“I’m not sure that’s okay either.”
“Then stay until I fall asleep? Dean will never have to know,” you held him tighter.
“I guess that would be okay,” you and Jack came to an agreement.
It took a mere five minutes before you had comatose. Once you were tucked in, Jack went into his room to grab the laptop before heading into the library. He was about ready to hit the Netflix button when the bunker door opened and shut. He averted his attention to the stair case to see Dean, Sam, and someone else.
“Hey Jack,” Sam greeted as he entered the room.
“Is that…” Dean started pointing to the nearly empty tequila bottle.
“Y/N was drinking it. It made her act really strange and it made me feel really weird,” Jack explicated.
“Wait, you and Y/N were drinking?” Sam raised an eyebrow in disbelief. “Did anything happen?” Sam asked with caution, a little afraid of the answer he may receive.
“Well, we kissed and she said I was horny. It was a strange feeling. I felt a throbbing –”
“Okay, I’ve heard enough! But nothing went in anywhere, right?” Dean’s voice held the same tone as Sam did.
“Went in? Actually –”
“OH GOD!” Dean cringed.
“She put her tongue in my mouth, and I did too. And she sat on my lap moving her hips on –”
“What part of, ‘I’ve heard enough’ did you not understand?” Dean snapped. Castiel was idly standing in the background witnessing the verbal exchange.
“But nothing else when in anywhere right?” Sam wanted to reaffirm.
“No? But I did carry her to her room so she could sleep.”
Dean opened his mouth to speak when Sam spoke up first. “That’s good. She’ll definitely need a lot of rest.”
“Who is that?” Jack pointed to Cass, who stood at the entrance.
“Jack, this is…”
--
The morning came and your eyes fluttered open. You groaned at the throbbing in your head. All you could remember was drinking and boy were you regretting it.
“Rise and shine sweetheart,” a familiar voice echoed through your room. You groaned, burying yourself into your pillows and blanket.
“No,” you mumbled, practically incoherent.
“Jack told us you had fun last night,” Dean whipped the blanket from your body.
“Dean!” You whined, struggling to open your eyes. “I can’t even remember what happened last night,” you admitted.
“So you don’t remember taking Jack’s virginity?” He barked.
“What?” You shot up from the bed, sobering up almost instantly. Your eyes were wide as you stared at Dean, who held a smug look. That was your only clue to prove he was lying.
“Jerk,” you curled back into your bed, grabbing your pillows and placing them over your body.
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And here is an cute little drawing @freakinflannel​ did for me, in inspiration of this fanfic! I just love it so much! Thank you love!!
Jack Taglist: @mannatgalhotra @i-mpala67 @bisexualdolphinthings @ilovemyangelforever @pureawesomeness001 @brooke-supernatural16 @sarkina
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lostinthelightss · 3 years
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literal chaos fire (ch.8)
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amazing banner by @downn-in-flames​ / down-in-flames@FFT
find it elsewhere: fft | ao3 | ff.net | hpff learn more: chaos universe link to other chapters: 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15 link to missing moments: 5.5, 7.5, 8.5, 15.5
pairing: Lily Luna Potter / OC genre: AU, Humor, Romance rating: mature audiences
summary:
Victoire Weasley is a masters student in infectious diseases handling a devastating break up with her girlfriend of two years. Lily Potter is a first year law student navigating a figurative minefield that is the star quarterback’s unrequited affection. Molly Weasley is pursuing her bachelors in engineering while pining over her best friend - who doesn’t seem to realize it.
Three women, three vastly different lives, all coming together with group chats, family dinners, and a whole lot of chaos.
chapter summary:
James [the older twin]: look, i just came out to have a good time James [the older twin]: and honestly im feeling very attacked rn James [the older twin]: also @Fred [the smart dumb one] are you not gonna say anything??
Fred [the smart dumb one]: lol yeah, fuck you james <3
OCTOBER 30TH, 2021
‘literal chaos fire' (psychiclilz, mollydramatic, VickyBaby) 9:39am
VickyBaby: still on for tonight?? VickyBaby: no one will know what hit em when we show up together
psychiclilz: yeah, but after last night i think im going easy on the drinks
VickyBaby: WHAT??? VickyBaby: its halloween eve VickyBaby: last year you called it ‘hoe christmas eve'
psychiclilz: hey i threw up again last night psychiclilz: i need one night off
mollydramatic: urghhh me too mollydramatic: not the vomiting part mollydramatic: the needing a break part, even if i probably wont
VickyBaby: you both went home hella early, wtf happened??
psychiclilz: i got a drive home after puking in the bathroom sink psychiclilz: it went 0-100 real quick
mollydramatic: *YOU* DID THAT???
psychiclilz: SORRY, I THOUGHT IT WAS BETTER THAN THE FLOOR
mollydramatic: THERE WAS A TOILET TWO FEET FROM YOU mollydramatic: ROSE MADE ME UNCLOG THAT
VickyBaby: ew, now im gonna vom
psychiclilz: call it payback for the couple costume
mollydramatic: bitch
psychiclilz: you know u love me
mollydramatic: ... mollydramatic: ugh i do mollydramatic: fine, i forgive you
VickyBaby: anyways, where'd you go last night mollz? VickyBaby: you usually dont tap out that early...
mollydramatic: just wasnt feeling it mollydramatic: oops, rose is calling! mollydramatic: haha, gotta go mollydramatic: talk soon! mollydramatic: see ya! mollydramatic: text me if you need me! mollydramatic: or dont, ill be busy mollydramatic: hahahhhaha
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(Lily Potter, Victoire Weasley) 9:52am
Lily: she's acting really squirrely
Victoire: yeah, somethings off Victoire: kind of like you that night flynn picked us up... Victoire: what did happen between you two?
Lily: how am i supposed to remember? Lily: it was like 2 months ago Lily: psssh Lily: wow, like you remember all ur drunk nights Lily: get real vic Lily: you black out like the rest of us
Victoire: neither of you are good at hiding things Victoire: you know that right?
Lily: shut up, this isnt about me Lily: do you think it had to do with the angel girl? Lily: emily? Lily: and why she left early too?
Victoire: emerson Victoire: idk Victoire: if there was a fight over lysander, dont you think we wouldve heard?
Lily: yeah, you would think...
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(Lily Potter, Scorpius Malfoy) 2:07pm
Scorpius: you guys are still coming over tonight right?
Lily: why, are you planning another costume mix up? Lily: i dont think molly will let go of totally spies, so whatever she said, shes lying
Scorpius: i told you last night i had nothing to do with that Scorpius: you asked me not to get involved between the two of you Scorpius: and i havent
Lily: yeah but rose has
Scorpius: i have no control over rose Scorpius: she makes her own decisions Scorpius: i, however, will do whatever she tells me to
Lily: ur such a sub
Scorpius: hey, dont knock femdom til you try it
Lily: VOM Lily: I DIDNT NEED TO KNOW THAT
Scorpius Malfoy set his nickname to rosie's sub.
Lily: oh my god, i think i might actually have to astral project over there just to slap you Lily: *this* is what you break your nickname rule for??? Lily: THIS???? Lily: VOM
rosie's sub: rose would like me to tell you she knows it was you who puked in the sink
Lily: yeah, molly already gave me the third degree Lily: also she cant be okay with that nickname
rosie's sub: actually im fine with it -rose rosie's sub: he vetoed rosie's peggee -rose
Lily: VOM Lily: UGHHHHHHHH
Lily Potter cleared Scorpius Malfoy's nickname.
Scorpius: i thought it was funny -rose
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‘literal chaos fire' (psychiclilz, mollydramatic, VickyBaby) 2:28pm
psychiclilz: Attachment: 2 Images psychiclilz: VOM
mollydramatic: WHY???? mollydramatic: WHYYYYYYYY mollydramatic: I LIVE WITH HER mollydramatic: I SHARE A WALL WITH HER mollydramatic: oh my god, can you faint from traumatic news? mollydramatic: im seriously light headed mollydramatic: if i die from a heart attack this is your fault
psychiclilz: I KNOW!!! psychiclilz: i actually almost threw up again
VickyBaby: ... VickyBaby: i dont think ill ever be able to look either of them in the face again
mollydramatic: and yet, we're expected to be there in like... mollydramatic: 6 hours
psychiclilz: i actually dont know if we should go psychiclilz: oh god what if shes wearing leather as part of her costume tonight psychiclilz: i will actually have a breakdown
VickyBaby: oh god, i actually just retched
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‘old fogies' (Fred [the smart dumb one], Lily [ur 15mins older], James [the older twin], Molly [the dumb smart one], Rose [the granger], Vic [the science beb]) 8:38pm
Fred [the smart dumb one]: WOOOOO @Rose [the granger] tell ur bf we are heeeere Fred [the smart dumb one]: let me innn!!! Fred [the smart dumb one]: let me innnnnnnn!!!!!!
James [the older twin]: *shakes gate*
Rose [the granger]: calm down Rose [the granger]: buzz up - 265
Fred [the smart dumb one]: thaaanks rosie
Rose [the granger]: <3
9:14pm 
Vic [the science beb]: SORRY!!! Vic [the science beb]: it took a little longer than we expected Vic [the science beb]: plus there's no parking on scorps street
Rose [the granger]: buzz up - 265 Rose [the granger]: WAIT WHO TF IS DRIVING???
Lily [ur 15mins older]: after last night im taking a night off from drinking, so DD
Rose [the granger]: good, dont throw up in scorps sink
James [the older twin]: THAT WAS YOU???? James [the older twin]: OH MY GOD, THAT IS WEDDING STORY POTENTIAL!!!
Molly [the dumb smart one]: fukc yu james, i cleaned itt up, is my story
Lily [ur 15mins older]: yeah, fuck you james Lily [ur 15mins older]: dont forget i have access to all your baby photos Lily [ur 15mins older]: AND all the photos Fred sends in the group chat
James [the older twin]: look, i just came out to have a good time James [the older twin]: and honestly im feeling very attacked rn James [the older twin]: also @Fred [the smart dumb one] are you not gonna say anything??
Fred [the smart dumb one]: lol yeah, fuck you james <3
0 notes
aliceellablog · 6 years
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Holiyay?
*08/10/17*
Sorry I haven’t posted for so long... ironic when you’re not well enough to write your blog about your illness aint it!?! 
Anyway, I’m gonna cut right to the chase. Instagram vs real life is such an issue for me. One I probably need to get over…. It’s so hard I don’t know wether I should try and only post positive fun photos and make it look like I’m having a right old great fucking time or to keep it more ‘real’? But then no-one wants to see pics of an ill sad girl and it’ll probably just look like I’m trying to get attention.
I guess this blog is my outlet for now…
I have people who are close to me who tell me that if I post about being ill all the time I’ll never get booked for work or gigs, but then when it comes to my (failing) career as an artist I want to be real. I want to be honest and build a genuine following of people who care enough to join me on the real journey??Answers on a postcard please thanks.
So if you’ve seen the recent Insta posts you will have seen that I managed to go on holiday with my besets friends - genuine yay!I’ve never been away with friends before and could not wait to get ma body in the sun!! Oh that sweet sweet vitamin D!
But maybe I underestimated how tiring travelling was and how hard it would be…
Don’t get me wrong I don’t regret going and there were some really genuinely lovely times - that and I feel so much closer to my friends, but I’ve been back home now for three weeks and I’m just about making it to the supermarket or doing small tasks around the house each day. BIG FAT MEH.
I know I say it a lot but M.E. is so fucking frustrating!!! Because the more you push through and try and go for it the worse you get, so you physically can’t just get on with things- and the pay back is hell.
So on the way there we had the biggest nightmare…. I met Katie, Grace, Tilly, and Nicki at the airport and all was chill- I was feeling pretty shit but not too terrible. We had a bit of food at the Wetherspoons - keeping it classy - and then all went off to get out bits and bobs from Boots, WHSmiths etc - classic airport essentials!! - now… I’ll spare you the details… but I also have Crohns disease, and was not tooooo well!! It seemed that all of a sudden our gate was called… and I was… erm… busy…
I was as quick as I could be (awks), but there is no rushing somethings man!!! We were all panicking on the WhatsApp group and I told the gals I would meet them at the gate… Grace (bless her heart) said she would wait for me - she went to the information desk and told them my situation and asked if we could get a wheelchair or one of those buggy things to assist us to the gate - which of course was the furthest one away!!!
Do you know what they said to her??
‘You have four minutes until the gate closes and you won’t get there in time. You have to go now and leave your friend’ Grace being Grace said no, and waited for me. She tried to explain but they said to her ‘If she’s ill she shouldn’t be travelling’ - THANKS GATWICK - REAL BIG HELP THERE!!
Anyway… I came out of the toilets (why oh why am I selling you all this hahahaha) and found Grace - we had less than 4 minutes to do like a good 10 minute walk.
I don’t think I’ve moved so fast in a long time!! We were proper power walking through the airport and Grace would break into a jog at some points. I was fast trailing behind her shouting ‘just go!’ ‘Go on without me!’ Which of course she didn’t….
Stress levels were ridiculous, and I almost collapsed on an escalator - I sat and G rubbed my back…. After what seemed like a marathon we got to the gate… where everyone was sat chilling and they hadn’t even stared boarding yet. cool. whatever… Then Tilly comes walking up behind us as my body is shaking and I start to cry from all the adrenaline- ‘oh hey guys! you got here quick!’ - yea Tilly… real quick….LOL
By that time my legs were utter jelly and I thought I was going to pass out - very pleasant- but we all got on the plane and were laughing so hard at the messages of sheer panic in the WhatsApp group! We were all SO RELIEVED that we had made it!! I literally thought I had ruined everyone’s holiday!! - oops!! Never eating before a flight again! ;)
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So we got to Spain and yet again the airport staff were assholes - I was as you can imagine feeling awful and there was a huge queue to get through passport control- I had my disabled parking badge with me as way of proof (people look at me and just don’t get it) and so Kaite and I asked if there was any where I could sit to wait for the queue to go down or any way we could go to the front. After they’d asked ‘where is the disabled girl?’ looking straight past me, and told me no, we’d had enough and just walked straight through while they shouted ‘Policia’ at us etc…. Luckily the police did not come and we went straight through!
What is it with these people?? Like even if I was a healthy girl who became ill on the plane they should WANT to help someone who is asking for assistance??
They can all get in the bin. End of.
So next was the drive (thank you Nicki for driving on the other side of the road for us all!!) to the villa and then we were there! Bloody exhausting.
The gals all then went out for dinner and I went to bed and ate a gluten free pot noodle I had packed in ma suitcase. Living the dream I tell ya!
The next day I was feeling pretty awful and chilled all day by the pool - now of course I am not complaining as I am so lucky to have been able to go on holiday at all, but that day, and most of the time actually, it was just a massive head fuck.
How was I was sat by the pool, surrounded by palm trees in the gorgeous sun, yet all I felt like doing was crying. I couldn’t shake it.
I didn’t want to be with my friends and I didn’t have the energy to make conversation, but kept trying and didn’t want to ruin everyone else’s holiday or be a downer.
Some of the time it just felt I was like having salt rubbed in my wounds right in my face. I was surrounded by four other healthy girls doing what I wished I could be.
I guess at home where I can escape to my room, and the fact that they are all at work everyday, it’s a little easier to cope.
But watching them all have fun and go out without me, and drink wine every night etc. was just a bit rubbish I guess.
I’m sure I sound ridiculous but you can’t help what you feel, and that’s what I felt.
The second night I went for dinner with them all but got so unwell I was in tears at the dinner table and got a cab home and left them to it. Fuck sake. (Sorry for all the swearing… just feel strongly lol)
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I did improve a bit as the holiday went on, and my god they were all SO helpful and caring - always carrying the sun lounger out to the pool for me, and making me food when I was super tired (great omelette’s Nix!!), taking my suitcase for me at the airport, all that kinda stuff - and for that I thank them all, I must have been such a burden always having to be ‘looked after’ and I hated that. But they were beyond wonderful. Love you all SO MUCH!!
Then Emily arrived for the last few days which was awesome as we don’t get to see her as much now she’s moved out- so that was cool and we had a really lovely day at the beach which I genuinely enjoyed and did feel a little better - oh and I got duck pancakes that day too… nuff said!! :)
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On the Saturday we had decided to have our one ‘night out’ -it was really nice to all get dolled up and as most of us are single now there was a lot of banter with the bar staff etc!
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But again I was there drinking a Diet Coke and they were there making bloody boomerangs of them cheersing with their champagne glasses and getting drunk. God I am bitter!! hahaha
How do I always end up writing about my long to get drunk on this blog haha…. I just really miss it I guess… It’s hard cos my personality is so full of get up and go and lets go get drunk and dance!!! But instead I get to a club, can’t drink and all I think about is where can I sit down and what time shall I get a cab home on my own.
Wow… I really can complain huh!!!
On a positive note- I did have a dance that night!! Ok it was for maybe like 2 songs and it was more of a side step LOL but it felt really good! … and again…. Bar staff were on fleeek - for a laugh Nicki and I went up and she dared me to ask for his number… which I did…he was like the most gorgeous man I had ever seen!! But he had to get a woman over to translate as he didn’t understand a word I was saying and then when he did give me his number he asked if I spoke Spanish… to which I said no…. Most pointless exchange ever but Nicki and I were dying laughing and then just kinda ran away! I felt 13 again!
Then Grace did a high kick on the dance floor and fell flat on her face - and got glass in her hand. Doh! Oh Grace- your dance moves make me so happy- man I wish I could do crying laughing emojis on here!!!
-Don’t worry, Grace got looked after! After being told she would need stitches by the bar staff, she ended up in A&E but came home a mere plaster
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Anyway I am rambling now -
After that night again I felt terrible and didn’t make it out to dinner with the gals but was glad I had made it out in the first place. I sat and ate chocolate watching the sunset instead. All good ;)
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Then the journey home of course was pretty rubbish - British Airways you suck balls. - We pre booked assistance on the way home after our first ordeal! But this then meant waiting on the (very cold) plane for another half an hour, then being wheeled to a dark hallway and being left sat there alone (no staff anywhere) for about 45 minutes. We got so fed up that Katie found a few wheelchairs and stole one- I mean if they’re not gonna help we will help ourselves… it was at that moment that the buggy arrived and faffed about for a long time and then took us through passport control etc. LONG. Would have probably been less tiring to walk but then you never know how far it is!
After hitting my head at the train station I arrived home to Sussex where my mum picked me up.
Then HOME!! Oh the joy!! Bed with my cat! YAAAASSSS!!!
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Unfortunately the next day I had hospital in the morning but it was to see a consultant I’ve been waiting forever to see who is giving me a trail of some new medication.
I don’t want to get my hopes up so am trying not to think about it but my god I am PRAYING that it might just help! - I’ll let ya know ;)
So now that I am back in London I am back to trying to do small realistic tasks each day and build back up from there. It’s depressing. It’s frustrating. It’s lonely. But it has to be done.
Much love for anyone who has actually read that!!! Means so much and am just trying to turn a negative into a positive - I enjoy writing this and hope that someone in a similar situation might be able to relate, and that someone who has never heard of M.E. might gain a little understanding.
Please get in touch if you wanna chat :)
My website: www.aliceella.com
Insta: @aliceellagram
MWAH x
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goldenmilkstudies · 7 years
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~Question Tag~
I was tagged by @fsstudies to answer these questions about myself.
I’m sorry it took so long for me to answering (holidays and introduction week of uni), so thank you for waiting patiently :).
 Since I’m quite new to all this I am keen to know more about y’all. I’m tagging the following to do this question tag. (If you’ve already done this, pls send me a link!) (If you aren’t tagged but still want to participate, do! and say you are ghost-tagged by me (I guess I just invested something – tell me if I’m wrong lol)).
@colorfulstudiess @rad-study @studioussummi @smallbeanstudies @hufflepuffsstudies @studyfeather @the-girlygeek @ubestudies
 Last
Drink – water
Phone call – a girl Andrea, bc I didn’t know how to get to her apartment
Text message – 8008, that’s a service in the Netherlands which sends a text to the number you texted them saying that you’d like to call them but you don’t have enough credit(?)
Song you listened to – Notion by Tash Sultana
Time you cried – Yesterday
Have you
Dated someone twice – I guess not
Kissed someone and regretted it – nah
Been cheated on – idk
Lost someone special – no
Been depressed – not diagnosed but I’m pretty sure I was a few years ago
Gotten drunk and thrown up – once the following morning with my first hangover :/
List 3 favourite colours
Forrest green | Burgundy | Yellow
 In the last year have you
Made new friends – yass, especially last week during my intro at uni
Fallen out of love – yup and fallen back in love (with the same person)
Laughed until you cried – I don’t remember so no
Found out someone was talking about you – sadly
Met someone who changed you – I think I met someone during the intro that is changing me
Kissed someone on your Facebook list – my boyfriend
 General
How many of your Facebook friends do you know in real life – all
Do you have any pets – three cats and one doggo
Do you want to change your name – I want to move to an English speaking country so I would maybe change my last name
What did you do for your last birthday – cooked dinner for my friends and family
What time did you wake up – 4 pm (went to bed at 8:30am) (bc this was the last night of the intro)
What were you doing at midnight last night – at Andrea drinking and playing picolo
Name something you can’t wait for – to see/touch my boyfriend, but also uni to start
When was the last time you saw your mom – on Sunday
What is one thing you wish you could change in your life – not stopping with French and German at school
What are you listening to right now – the wind going through trees, myself typing and cars passing by
Have you ever talked to a person named Tom – yass, a friend
Something that is getting on your nerves – the mess in my sister’s apartment (which I made) (where I’m staying for the intro)
Most visited websites – Instagram, Facebook, Tumblr and YouTube atm
Mole(s) – A lot, they tend to be in groups (idk why this happens lol)
Mark(s) – inside my left arm and on the left side of my back
Childhood dream – can’t remember oops
Hair colour – blond / dark blond / brown, it’s kinda all over the pace
Long or short hair – I have medium long hair but really want long hair
Do you have a crush on someone – nah
What do you like about yourself – outside, my eyes | inside, I have a pretty diverse personality & I am down to earth & I am accepting of all beings and expressions & I want to do a lot for the world
Piercings – two in both my lobes & helix in my left ear & industrial in my right ear
Blood type – the most common one (I forgot lol)
Nickname – family, Belle | boyfriend, Isaak | best friends, Belski
Relationship status – boyfriend
Zodiac – virgo (I read horoscopes and things but they never describe me….)
Pronouns – she/her
Favourite TV show – Grimm | Orphan Black | Dragons (from how to train your dragon)
Tattoos – none but want one
Right or left hand – right
Surgery – yas
Hair dyed in different colour – purple :0
Sport – rn nothing but at uni I plan to do yoga & strength training & boot camp and maybe dance if I like a class
Vacation – this year to Athens with friends and to Berlin with my boyfriend
Pair of trainers – black puma trinomic and salmon coloured asics
 More general
Eating – vegan, I aim for a whole foods diet | atm I’d like to eat Mexican food tbh
Drinking – water | rooibos & camomile tea | chai latte
I’m about to – eat bc the kitchen was occupied with people from the hall
Waiting for – the wifi to have a chill so I can actually be productive for once
Want – FOOOOOOD
Get married – I don’t necessarily want to, but I’m willing to compromise
Career – my dream is to have a vegan lunchroom, but I’d also like to write a blog or books or own a shop or a business
Hugs or kisses – kissing while hugging (?)
Lips or eyes – I think that eyes can almost never be ugly but lips can be, so eyes
Shorter or taller – I’m okay with my height (wow we are the same height @fsstudies)
Older or younger – I don’t mind growing older, I do mind not using the time I got
Nice arms or nice stomach – idc as long as it all works together
Sensitive or loud – sensitive
Hook up or relationship – relationship, tho I’d like to be able to have hook ups from time to time
Troublemaker or hesitant – neither (?)
 Have you ever
Kissed a stranger – yas
Drank hard liquor – gotta love the 43
Lost glasses / contact lenses – I don’t own them so no
Turned someone down – yas, a friend :(
Sex on the first date – nahhhhh
Broken someone’s heart – probably
Had your heart broken – can’t remember
Been arrested – no but I got a warning for driving (lol trying to) without a license
Cried when someone died – All. The. Time. I get really emotional abt other people’s deaths
Fallen for a friend – sorta
 Do you believe in
Yourself – too little
Miracles – no
Love at first sight – no, there can be a connection but I wouldn’t call that love tbh
Santa Claus – urm yeah…
Kiss on the first date – depends
 Other
Current best friend name – I don’t have a Best Friend, just a close group of friends
Eye colour – hazel
Favourite movie – atm, “I, origin” and “Mad Max”
 Thank you for coming this far :0,  enjoy your day ♥
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scifiphan · 7 years
Text
92 Things About Me
tysm @sleepwalkerphan  for tagging me in this! it’s 2am and I’m procrastinating the heck out of writing so this is perfect lmao.
also I’ll put most of the things below the cut so keep reading if ya wanna know 92 fun facts about me
edit: this took me almost an hour to do and towards the end, I basically confess my entire life so have fun reading that lmao. like i seriously have a realisation about how idk what i’m doing with my life hahahaha
THE LAST..
1. Drink : Water #stayhydrated 2. Phone call : mum 3. Text Message : a gif of phil being scared in bed (even my irl friends are trash) 4. Song You Listened To : currently listening to Taro - alt-J 5. Time You Cried : On sunday I cried over a renovation reality tv show (??? yeah idk either, bro) the apartments just looked so nice and the team I liked got kicked off the show.
HAVE YOU EVER..
6. Dated Someone Twice : nope 7. Been Cheated On : nope 8. Kissed Someone And Regretted It : YES (smh @ me) 9. Lost Someone Special : thankfully no 10. Been Depressed : i honestly don’t know. i think I have but am so freaking stubborn at admitting I have had depressive episodes in the past 11. Got Drunk And Thrown Up : YES OH MY GOODNESS I HAVE HAD SO MANY BAD TIMES. DON’T DRINK WINE AND THEN A MILKSHAKE AND THEN DANCE ON A BEACH. YOU WILL ONLY END UP THROWING UP IN A GARBAGE BIN OUTSIDE A KEBAB STORE (it wasn’t even after midnight, that’s the most embarrassing thing) 
LIST 3 FAVOURITE COLOURS :
12. Green 13. Pink 14. Turquoise
IN THE LAST YEAR HAVE YOU..
15. Made New Friends : yes!! so many new and amazing friends 16. Fallen Out Of Love : nope. 17. Laughed Until You Cried : laughing until I cry is me every time 18. Found Out Someone Was Talking About You : yes (you would think that adults would stop teen behaviours lol) 19. Met Someone Who Changed You : yes, the last year included so much change. 20. Found Out Who Your True Friends Are : Yes. Just gonna put it out there: traveling for an extensive period of time overseas really shows who your true friends are and who are the snakes. 21. Kissed Someone On Your Facebook List : hahahaha yes (too mant rip) 22.How Many Of Your Facebook Friends Do You Know In Real Life :  probably almost all of them (so like 550) only a few on there are my internet friends 23. Do You Have Any Pets : nope and I probs wont get another pet for a long long time 24. Do You Want To Change Your Name : NO!!!!!!! Teddii is a blessing although I would change my last name (it’s two surnames joined together and it makes life difficult because it’s so long) 25. What Did You Do For Your Last Birthday : went out for dinner at a mexican place, won a few dollars on the pokies and then went out clubbing (also i got a fine rip me) 26. What Time Did You Wake Up This Morning: 11am OOPS (i slept in and missed uni) 27. What Were You Doing At Midnight Last Night : probably making a gif 28. Name Something You Cannot Wait For : FINISHING UNI AND MOVING TO THE UK (hopefully to do my masters in global terrorism at the uni of london but if not i really wanna get a 1 year working visa and just do some hospitality work before I start a career) 29. When Was The Last Time You Saw Your Mother : like 4 hours ago when we were watching tv 30. What Is One Thing You Could Change About Your Life : I wish I had a UK passport, it would make life a lot easier for me if I had dual citizenship instead of a boring Australian passport 31. What Are You Listening To Right Now : alt-J, a live performance of Taro  32. Have You Ever Talked To A Person Named Tom : I know so many Tom’s it’s ridiculous 33. Something That Is Getting On Your Nerves : PEOPLE!!! WHO!! THINK!! THAT!! IF YOUR DEGREE!! ISN’T STEM!! THEN IT ISN’T!! HARD!!!! (i’m looking @ every friend who does a stem degree and always laughs at how my degree must be so easy because it doesn’t include math)
34. Most Visited Websites : tumblr, youtube, my uni’s website, facebook 35. Elementary : v great time, got bullied heaps but still had fun 36. High School : problematic fave. honestly my time at high school can fill a 500 page essay. being right next to a beach and river was actually gr8, the endless issues weren’t so good. 37. College/University : it has been a wild ride. I swapped degrees so I still have around 2 years left but uni has been my fave so far 38. Hair Colour : PINK!!!! (naturally ginger) 39. Long or Short Hair : long 40. Do You Have A Crush On Someone : nope (which is a shocker) 41. What Do You Like About Yourself : I like my individuality and independance 42. Piercings : 2x lobes, 1x helix, 1x nose. (i’m thinkng about getting my conch in a few weeks) 43. Blood Type : O+ 44. Nickname : ted, teddii bear, sideshow bob, cotton candy 45. Relationship Status : hella single 46. Zodiac Sign : Cancer (aka my birthday is soon hell yeah) 47. Pronouns : she/her. 48. Favourite Tv Show : STAR TREK: VOYAGER WILL ALWAYS BE MY FAVOURITE 49. Tattoos : crescent moon on my right wrist (i sorta don’t like how it turned out but after a year I have grown to appreciate the meaning) 50. Right Or Left Hand : Left handed (aka another reason why Dan is my spirit animal)
FIRST..
51. Surgery : i got a bunch of teeth removed when I was like 4/5  52. Word : baba or ma  53. Sport : soccer  54. Vacation : i actually can’t remember my first vacation. probs Sydney tbh idk I went a lot of places when I was young 55. Pair Of Trainers : probably something Adidas tbh
WHAT ARE YOU..
56. Eating : nothing 57. Drinking : water 58. Reading : nothing at the moment besides uni textbooks 59. I’m About To : I should say sleep but I’ll probably just watch youtube 60. Listening To : Breezeblocks by alt-J (can you see a recurring theme with my music questions?) 61. Waiting For : GoT SEASON 7 AKA MY BIRTHDAY (honestly feel so blessed to grow older and watch new GoT on the same day) 62. Craving For : MONEYYYYYYY. ya girl is unemployed thanks to the bad habit of planning last minute overseas holidays 63. Do you wanna get married : eventually but at the same time it doesn’t worry me 64. Going To Do When You Get Older : ????? ?????? ????? you would think I would have an idea but tbh idk. I’m studying International Relations and I want to do a postgrad in global terrorism. But career wise I have no bloody idea. I would like to work in the UN or UNESCO or for the Australian Government in an embassy. but at the same time I also want to be a travel photographer and just ignore my degree (idk adult life is hard)
YOUR TYPE..
65. Hugs or Kisses : HUGS 66. Lips or Eyes : eyes! <3333 67. Short or Tall : tall guys!!! but short girls are my weakness!! 68. Young or Old : HA haHA HA old 69. Nice Arms Or Nice Stomach : slight preference for nice arms because tummys are cute no matter what 70. Sensitive or Loud : I am both of those things so, por que no las dos? 71. Hook Up or Relationship : relationship (although I can’t relate because i am eternally single) 72. Troublemaker or Hesitant : I prefer when people are upfront instead of hiding stuff from me so I guess that means troublemaker?
HAVE YOU EVER..
73. Kissed A Stranger : yes 74. Drank Hard Liquor : yes (love me some vodka) 75. Lost Eye glasses or contact lenses : not yet thankfully 76. Turned Someone Down : YES! (there is nothing wrong with turning people down.) 77. Sex On First Date : no 78. Broken Someone’s Heart : yes and I still feel bad 79. Had Your Heart Broken : yep 80. Been Arrested : yes (kind of, long story) 81. Cried When Someone Died : yes. although I tend to go more numb instead of crying. idk it’s weird because I cry about everything but death kinda makes me become numb 82. Fallen For A Friend : yes (oops)
DO YOU BELIEVE IN..
83. In Yourself : yes although I need to believe in myself a lot more 84. Miracles : yes 85. Love At First Sight : yes and no. I believe it exists but I feel like a lot of people believe that they are experiencing love at first sight when in reality it is infatuation/lust. 86. Santa Claus : this question conflicts me because the logical side of me says no but the optimistic child side of me refuses to accept the truth 87. Kiss On The First Date : yeah 88. Angels : nah, not for me
OTHER..
89. Current best friend’s name : do i have a best friend? not really. again, it’s a weird time for me when it comes to friends. 90. Eye Colour : um blue with green and grey mixed in (it’s so hard to describe but yeah, those three) 91. Favourite singer/Band : Ed Sheeran, Mumford & Sons, al-J (i love them all a lot.) 92. Favourite Movie : Avatar. yes the blue alien one. It’s lame but I fell in love with the na’vi culture and it kinda helped get me obsessed with scifi.
And that’s a wrap!
If anyone actually read all that I hope you enjoyed my (very) late night confessions. Idk who to tag so if you see this and want to do it feel free to do so! Also, come hit up my inbox/messages if you wanna be my friend after reading this, I wanna make some friends on this hellsite
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frankunn-cain · 7 years
Text
Rules: you must answer these 85 statements and tag 20 people
hi um @yoshifics tagged me in this thing so i’m gonna answer some things (thank you for thinking of me)
tagging: @freckledandspectacled @toriirdz @frank-myhero-iero @smut-smut-in-the-butt @talkriddletome @xhanac @completelychris @neverland-in-space @preasylumtrager @sirachas @partygoul321 @flux–and–flow 
 the last … 
 1. drink: herbal tea. yep, I’m a tea hoe
2. phone call: My dad, he told me my grandma’s sister died. I’ve only met her once, but it’s really affecting my grandma
 3. text message: to my brother, I’m trying to build a 3D printer
4. song you listened to: I Don’t Love You by My Chemical Romance… ok I’m a bit emo. I was sad leave me alone :p
5. time you cried: early june. my school isn’t letting me go to graduation.. i thought i’d get over it, but it’s still hitting me
6. dated someone twice: no?
7. kissed someone and regretted it: ya i guess. i enjoyed it, but i really shouldn’t have
8. been cheated on: well i hope not
9. lost someone special: they didn’t die (if that’s what this is asking), but a good friend just ghosted me out of nowhere idk
10. been depressed: ye been a constant thing for awhile :)
 11. gotten drunk and thrown up: haven’t thrown up because of it
favorite colors… 
12. light pale blue
13.  holographic black (idk if this counts lol)
14. slightly darker than blood red
in the last year have you… 
15. made new friend: ye i think so
16. fallen out of love: idk relationships are so confusing
17. laughed until you cried: once? maybe?
18. found out someone was talking about you: ya :/ idk how to deal with that
19. met someone who changed you: ya, they’ve helped me grow
20. found out who your friends are: ya. when i came out my friend groups treated me strangely.. so kinda had to find a new one
21. kissed someone on your facebook list: Yes. If by facebook list you mean we’re friends on facebook
general
 22. how many of your facebook friends do you know in real life: Pretty much all of them? i don’t use facebook really 
23. do you have any pets: ya, i got a bearded dragon named Smaug and a pup named Bailey. I kinda share my best friends cats (3 hypatia, ozzy, and achilles) because I spend so much time at their house (my situation at my house isn’t so great)
24. do you want to change your name: Yes i absolutely hate my birth name :)
 25. what did you do for your last birthday: had dinner with my boss idk i wanted to not be around my family
26. what time did you wake up: like noon. I’m jetlagged and i feel like a bum 
27. what were you doing at midnight last night: playing a new game i bought from the steam sale when i should’ve been drawing oops
28. name something you can’t wait for: a safe feeling :) i rly need to get away from my house. i get nightmares a lot and idk what to do
29. when was the last time you saw your mom: today
31. what are you listening to right now: sense8 on netflix a friend told me to. it’s p good
32. have you ever talked to a person named tom: Does Thomas count? If so yes. I know one from this space thing and one at school
33. something that is getting on your nerves: myself 
34. most visited website: this one? or youtube? 
35. hair colour: Black. i wanna try dying it
36. long or short hair: Short. one side is shaved rn
37. do you have a crush on someone: idk feelings are complicated
 38. what do you like about yourself: mm yikes. some stuff i’ve made i’m proud of
39. piercings: just my ears. i really wanted snake bites for a long time lol 
40. blood type: O- 
 41. nickname: pear, oswald, ozzie, peari, oz (insert pear emoji here) 
42. relationship status: relationships are confusing don’t talk to me 
43. zodiac: chinese: golden dragon, asrological: taurus i think
44. pronouns: he/ him
45. favourite tv show: (im gonna list a few) GOTHAM!! i’m in so deep man. it’s the only show i’ve watched air. Danny phantom, Avatar: the last airbender, Durarara, Soul Eater, sense8 (idk tho i haven’t finished), star trek: the next generation, shameless, sherlock, doctor who, great british baking show, chopped, merlin, magicians, ouran high school host club, series of unfortunate events, kill la kill, TEEN TITANS
46. tattoos: nope, but i reeeeally want some
47. right or left handed: Right-handed, but i can draw with both
48. surgery: not yet, but i need one soon
49. piercing: repeat?
50. sport: i did rowing in high school
51. vacation: i really want to go to a lot of places in asia (japan again, south korea, taiwan, tahiti )
52. pair of trainers: shoes? ya i have running shoes
more general 
53. eating: i like asian and mexican food
54. drinking: tea!!! (bubble tea too) slushies, apple juice, milk
55. i’m about to: try finishing the 3D printer, hopefully draw
56. waiting for: fulfillment idk i’m kinda a mess rn 
57. want: okie doki, a lot. security in the future, not to worry about money, a cat, surgery, time, clothes, better mental state, relationships i feel absolutely safe about
58. get married: yo man, that’s scary 
59. career: working in stop-motion animation
60. hugs or kisses: i like both in different contexts. hugs can be with more people, but still i hate strangers hugging me. making out is like v great tho :0
61. lips or eyes: Can I say both again? eyes can be so friggin cool tbh. irises are so complex and can like dilate an shit??? but mouths have so many different shapes????? im smitten bro
62. shorter or taller: either
63. older or younger: either? in a dating context i usually like older people. (I’ve had the biggest crush on my english teacher, sorry Mr. Rossen)
64. nice arms or nice stomach: i feel like those are weird things to pin against? why not arms or legs? but I guess arms? you ever see a guy with nice arms and you like omg strangle me. mkay just me (no one is gonna read this far)
65. hook up or relationship: i’m uh kinda asexual so i wouldn’t have hook up sex? but make out and stuff sure, but I’d rather have a healthy relationship because u can do nasty stuff and cuddly/ domestic stuff
66. troublemaker or hesitant: i’m a chaotic neutral, i’ll hesitate if i’m not sure of the outcome 
67. kissed a stranger: Nope
68. drank hard liquor: Ye but i’d rather mix it with stuff
69. lost glasses/contact lenses: ya my mom was so mad i felt terrible :(((
70. turned someone down: I guess? i was in a relationship and he was being pushy??
71. sex on the first date: no I could not 
72. broken someone’s heart: i do not know. i hope not. i’m sorry dude
73. had your heart broken: when I came out to my parents
74. been arrested: Nope 
75. cried when someone died: ya…this dude in my grade died recently. i saw him the day before.
76. fallen for a friend: ya i think 
do you believe in … 
77. yourself: HAHAHAHA 
78. miracles: yo idk i wish
79. love at first sight: not really? but i won’t be against
80. santa claus: Nope 
81. kiss on the first date: why not? 
82. angels: not as little kiddies with wings
other 
83. current best friend’s name: one? lol can’t pick. Teutie, Illuin, Heming 
84. eye colour: brown?
85. favourite movie: mm nah i’m gonna list again. HELLBOY!!! i rly like the avengers one, Lord of the rings, Coraline, the purge, sweeny todd, little shop of horrors, gremlins, zootopia, star trek, star wars, the little prince, mean girls, mad max, the man from uncle, guardians of the galaxy, x men, harry potter (i like the 4th the best)
welp! Thanks for tagging me @yoshifics This was really fun!
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blk-femme · 7 years
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2 Days in Austin
Went to visit bbgirl Janul during her work trip. It was a hella fast tour through Austin but we had so much fun! Worked during the day because ya girl don’t got vacation days to spare but we did cool stuff in the evenings! Read on!
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Stay: Aloft at The Domain - The Domain is the real nice shopping area with outlet sized stores and great restaurants. I tried to explore during the day but somehow got very lost and ended up in only Sephora and the NYX store. oops?
Wednesday
What we ate:
La Vaca Street Bar - I roamed The Domain and stumbled upon this indoor/outdoor sports bar.  Pretty empty during the day but the Asian Boneless wings and Calamari were BOMB. I also had a beer (on purpose). Blood and Honey a local Austin beer
Torchy's Taco - Breakfast Tacos are like Austinites main jam and understandably so. The obsession is definitely justified - breakfast is one of the best meals of the day (second only to brunch) and you can never go wrong with tacos. Torchy’s is an Austin staple and Janul and I went for dinner and had some great tacos and bomb af nachos. Topped off with a Modelo because duh.
What we drank:
Somersault Inventive Cocktail Bar - This place was ALRIGHT. It was right next to our hotel so we checked it out. Ambiance was somewhere between trendy rustic modern nautical - which as you can imagine is a weird combo. Drinks were sub par. One cool thing was their jello shot bar - but the jello shots weren’t very good so... The bartender did have a very cute manicure though. Good for you boo boo.
Garage Cocktail Bar - Super cute craft cocktail bar located in the parking garage of the American National Bank. V dim. Like “if I napped in a corner would anyone notice” dim. But really good strong drinks.  
Where we swam:
Barton Springs - A Hot Spring in the middle of the city! So bizarre but so cool. It was HUGE. Austin hot af so this was the perfect place to cool down in the evening. About $8 for the pool and free for the smaller spring part. Lots of people laying around tanning and jumping off the diving board. Definitely a must do.
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Thursday
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What we saw:
Whole Foods Flagship Store - SO COOL. As someone who works in food retail, I figured I definitely had to check this out. Yo. This place was a dreamy heaven. It had multiple restaurants inside including a smoked BBQ spot. Multiple bars including a WINE BAR. bish. Several dessert bars, food prep stations and sampling. It was wild. Me and Janul had to leave quickly before they took all my monies. Go here if you don’t love your wallet.
What we ate:
Stiles Switch - If you went to the south, and didn’t get BBQ, did you go to the south? This place felt super authentic- they served you your food on a huge tray with the servers pulling meat right off the spit as you made your way down the line selecting what foods you wanted. There were huge vats of mac and cheese and a bunch of other sides. My advice? GO HUNGRY.
What we drank:
Dirty Sixth Street  - Austin’s little baby version of Bourbon Street. A section of 6th street that is blocked off at night for drunk af people to stumble from bar to bar. It was super fun and we didn’t even get that drunk or go to that many places. However, I imagine it is a COMPLETE shitshow when college kids are around. With the proximity to UT Austin and the whole street being shut off, like bruh.
Parlor & Yard - Not on the dirty side of 6th - this craft cocktail place was on West 6th, The Dirty’s fancy cousin - and this place was definitely one of the prettiest bars I’ve been to. Bartender was a cutie too ayeee.
Friends Bar - kinda lame, there was a band playing but no one watching lol
Dizzy Rooster - Great live music here  - we were accosted by an Australian or Irish? drunk couple who latched onto us for the entire duration of the like half hour that we were there. There was also a group of men in wheelchairs who were having the time of their lives with all their ladies draped over them. GET IT.
The Blind Pig - My favorite of the night! This place had a downstairs bar but the rooftop gave me open air warehouse vibes. A huge space with live music (clearly a theme in Austin) and people all over the dance floor. There were multiple bars, games, a dj spinning from some contraption in the air. It was lit. We had to cut the night short because ya girl had a 6 am flight but it was a VERY good time. Babygirl Janul had her first pickle back shot!
Austin, I’ll be back!
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yamesutya · 7 years
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1-154 all of them!! Because I want to know everything!! what the heck! I love you, have a lovely night :)
LMAO ANON YOU CRAZY I LOVE YOU THOUGH THANK YOU HAHA
(lol I’m working my way through them, it’s not quite done yet. ANON YOU BETTER SEE THIS LOL)
1. Full nameSonia Fan (that’s it, no middle name)
2. Zodiac signleo
3. 3 Fears bugs, the ocean, being alone/forgotten/left behind
4. 3 things I lovepuppies, tacos, traveling
5. 4 turns onsnice eyes, a good sense of humor, being open-minded, nicely kept hair (particularly the swooped up style that hector used to have)
6. 4 turns offs lack of communication, unfaithfulness, racism/general offensive behavior/lack of understanding of others, poor taste in sports teams lmao 
7. My best friend my roommate!
8. Sexual orientationstraight
9. My best first datelol ok well this might sound confusing but I’ve never really officially dated anyone (to me this means officially bf/gf), but I’ve gone on a nice date on valentine’s day and the relationship didn’t end up being weird even though it didn’t work out… we just went to the movies and dinner
11. What do I miss
LONDON, all the places I’ve traveled mostly… OOH, the animes I finished recently because I need them to come back RIGHT NOW
12. What time were I born
I actually don’t remember… 
13 Favourite colour purple
14. Do I have a crush
hm, not really, kind of still like the guy I was talking to a while ago but ATM it’s best I just focus on myself
15. Favourite quote
this isn’t necessarily my favorite, but one I’ve always remembered and liked is��“the past is in the past, let it fucking GO”
16. Favourite place
london, hands down, can you tell? 
18. Do I use sarcasm
hahaha oh boy do I ever I’ve been sarcastic since day 1
19. What am I listening to right now
irl nothing lol 
20. First thing I notice in new person
their smile, how they carry themselves 
21. Shoe size
teeny tiny, 5-5 ½, sometimes a 6
22. Eye colour
brown
23. Hair colour
dark brown
24. Favourite style of clothing
anything in the color black lmao I kid you not. comfy, clean but cute and stylish I guess, I’m pretty basic tbh 
25. Ever done a prank call?
noooo
26. What colour of underwear I’m wearing now?
I had to check lmao, white
27. Meaning behind my URL
hector is the (albeit problematic but lovable) OG arsenal fav, he’s not the first reason I looked into arsenal, but he is what hooked me 
29. Favourite song
honestly I have a few, my most recent jams have been La Carretera (Prince Royce), Ya Me Enteré (Reik ft. Nicky Jam), Nunca Me Olvides (Yandel), aaand Caroline (Aminé) randomly
lots of latin music since I’ve had the local latin station on a lot lol
30. Favourite band
This Century, Marianas Trench 
31. How I feel right now
a little stressed, but doing ok
32. Someone I love
my parents
33. My current relationship status
single, a little confused and sad, but still sort of ready to mingle
34. My relationship with my parents
I get cranky when I stay at home too much these days, but it’s good so far and I love them, I miss them every time I leave. I don’t tell them enough but I’m super thankful for the life they’ve given me, I graduate soon and I know when that happens and I see them I’m going to be emotional 
36. Tattoos and piercings?
used to have my ears pierced, no tattoos  
Tattoos and piercing i want
one day I’ll probably get my ears pierced again, and I actually do want a few tattoos even though when I was younger I never thought I would. I want some purple flowers on my wrist, and potentially ones involving arizona, where I’m from, maybe my astrological sign or some kind of soul animal, but I’m not sure about those so it’d be a while if I were to get the last two
37. The reason I joined Tumblr
my friend had one and it looked fun lol. and I was just getting into kpop 
38. Do I and my last ex hate each other?
um. he’s not even really an ex since we were still figuring things out. but we’re a bit awkward. we’re just both dumb and stubborn tbh
39. Do I ever get “good morning” or “good night ” texts?
i have occasionally
40. Have I ever kissed the last person you texted?
it’s my dad, so kind of yes lol
41. When did I last hold hands?
october…?
42. How long does it take me to get ready in the morning?
if I’m not showering I can get ready in 20 minutes but it’s nothing fancy
43. Have I shaved your legs in the past three days?
yes actually
44. Where am I right now?
my apartment kitchen table 
45. If I were drunk & can’t stand, who’s taking care of me?
probably my roommate 
46. Do I like my music loud or at a reasonable level?
reasonable
47. Do I live with my Mom and Dad?
not at the moment
48. Am I excited for anything?
my sports classes, nervous-excited for graduation, spring break…
49. Do I have someone of the opposite sex I can tell everything to?
yesss, he is my self-titled gbf actually lol
50. How often do I wear a fake smile?
when I’m working games for my athletics department internship haha, it’s not super forced but I do smile a little harder purposefully
51. When was the last time I hugged someone?
today! some of my fellow senior friends because almost graduating is weird
52. What if the last person I kissed was kissing someone else rightin front of me?
it would be real bad, I’m not good at taking things like that. I’d have to leave, if I was drunk I’d probably cry and potentially throw up. this is only because the last person I kissed I really liked, if it was a person I randomly made out with one time it wouldn’t be that bad
53. Is there anyone I trust even though I should not?
probably the guy I keep talking about in this, he is a good person who can be trusted, I probably just trusted him with too much of me when we both weren’t ready for each other (ew was that too deep I’m sorry lol)
54. What is something I disliked about today?
being too tired to properly read as much for my homework as I had wanted, boo :(
56. What do I think about most?
at the moment, my future, and also the animes I’ve recently watched 
57. What’s my strangest talent?
I can lick my elbow and I have super flexible/hyper-extended knees (idk are these even talents lmao)
58. Do I have any strange phobias?
that one where you don’t like tons of tiny holes in things
59. Do I prefer to be behind the camera or in front of it?I’d be lying if I said just behind, but I do like taking pictures since I take pretty good ones, so it’s a little of both. I like attention though so mostly in front haha unless I’m doing dumb things
60. What was the last lie I told?
I said I’d bring in the routes I was supposed to deliver posters to for my internship, but I’m going to making up notes and turning it in to get paid even though I didn’t deliver any, oops 
61. Do I prefer talking on the phone or video chatting online?
video chatting, I hate talking on the phone for some reason
62. Do I believe in ghosts? How about aliens?
not really, I’m not against believing in them, I just don’t really think about them much
63. Do I believe in magic?hmmmmmm yes…
64. Do I believe in luck?
yeah, I’d say I do, I believe in fate a little at least
65. What’s the weather like right now?
chilly
66. What was the last book I’ve read?
I recently restarted Soccernomics, but I haven’t had time to read again lately
67. Do I like the smell of gasoline?
not really
68. Do I have any nicknames?
not any that have stuck
69. What was the worst injury I’ve ever had?
I’m a baby, nothing worse than cuts, bruises, scrapes, etc. 
70. Do I spend money or save it?
lol I’m not the worst but I’m a spender
71. Can I touch my nose with a tongue?
yes!
72. Is there anything pink in 10 feets from me?
one of my G2 pens
73. Favourite animal?
DOGS ALL THE DOGS, but also otters, lions and foxes, red pandas… 
74. What was I doing last night at 12 AM?
watching youtube videos lol
75. What do I think is Satan’s last name is?
um…? no answer? idk
76. What’s a song that always makes me happy when I hear it?

How can you win my heart?

What would I want to be written on my tombstone?

What is my favourite word

My top 5 blogs on tumblr

If the whole world were listening to me right now, what would Isay?

Do I have any relatives in jail?

I accidentally eat some radioactive vegetables. They were good,and what’s even cooler is that they endow me with the super-power of my choice!What is that power?

What would be a question I’d be afraid to tell the truth on?

What is my current desktop picture?

Had sex?

Bought condoms?

Gotten pregnant?

Failed a class?

Kissed a boy?

Kissed a girl?

Have I ever kissed somebody in the rain?

Had job?

Left the house without my wallet?

Bullied someone on the internet?

Had sex in public?

Played on a sports team?

Smoked weed?

Did drugs?

Smoked cigarettes?

Drank alcohol?

Am I a vegetarian/vegan?

Been overweight?

Been underweight?

Been to a wedding?

Been on the computer for 5 hours straight?

Watched TV for 5 hours straight?

Been outside my home country?

Gotten my heart broken?

Been to a professional sports game?

Broken a bone?

Cut myself?

Been to prom?

Been in airplane?

Fly by helicopter?

What concerts have I been to?

Had a crush on someone of the same sex?

Learned another language?

Wore make up?

Lost my virginity before I was 18?

Had oral sex?

Dyed my hair?

Voted in a presidential election?

Rode in an ambulance?

Had a surgery?

Met someone famous?

Stalked someone on a social network?

Peed outside?

Been fishing?

Helped with charity?

Been rejected by a crush?

Broken a mirror?

What do I want for birthday?

How many kids do I want and what will be their names?

Was I named after anyone?

Do I like my handwriting?

What was my favourite toy as a child? 
Favourite Tv Show?

Where do I want to live when older?

Play any musical instrument?

One of my scars, how did I get it?

Favourite pizza toping?

Am I afraid of the dark?

Am I afraid of heights?

Have I ever got caught sneaking out or doing anything bad?

Have I ever tried my hardest and then gotten disappointed in theend?
What I’m really bad at

What my greatest achievements are

The meanest thing somebody has ever said to me

What I’d do if I won in a lottery

What do I like about myself

My closest Tumblr friend

Something I fantasise about my ex
Ask me stuff!
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