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#y'all these guys have consumed my life
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just gonna leave this here
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gracieheartspedro · 2 months
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Your Needs, My Needs
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THE PRELUDE
a masterlist of how you can help gaza
pairing: cowboy!joel x f!reader (no outbreak)
description: you have made it to your new home in taylor, texas. your anxiety of owning your our home and being alone is coming to a head, but you need to be productive. a trip to the local furniture turns into you meeting some locals and your new cowboy neighbor.
word count: 3.7k words
warnings: there is no smut in this part. still MINORS DNI! no use of y/n! vague talk of reader's old life before texas, no real description of the reader, description of small age gap, joel being a sarcastic shithead. sarah is canon, so joel is a dad. distracted driving. talks of consuming food. reader has mental illness, mainly described as anxiety, but could be other illnesses. I make it pretty vague. the reader likes football? lmfao
author's note: this is the prelude to the many parts I have planned for these two. this is sort of just setting up everything. I want a slow burn for these two, so hopefully these first couple parts make you guys sweat with anticipation. I also wanna quickly thank all of you for the love on the preview of this fic. I hope you all enjoy it! let me know what y'all think. YEEHAW!
“Sign here and she’s all yours.”
When you brought the pen to the dotted line, you knew that this was going to be the start of your new life. 
While you were nervous about taking on such a huge project, you were ready to find solace in your alone time and work on yourself along with the beautiful farmhouse. You needed some peace and quiet, anyway. 
She was set on 20 acres of land on the outskirts of a small town called Taylor. The land looked like something out of a movie, it’s rolling hills and sprawling fields. 
The house was about 130 years old and needed a lot of TLC. You found it online after hours of scrolling. It was still liveable, but the older couple who owned it before moved to a retirement community and could not keep up with the maintenance. When the inheritance hit your bank account, you called the local realtor and told them you would be flying out there to check it out. When the car pulled up the long driveway, you knew that it would be yours. 
Texas was a new start for you. And boy, were you ready for it. 
You did not have a lot to move in, just a small UHaul full of boxes of clothes and miscellaneous trinkets. You left your furniture in your shared apartment in New York. You needed to find something that was more your style, anyway. 
You moved everything yourself. You were not sure you were ready to trust anyone to help you move in. You knew no one locally, anyway.
It took about three days to get settled, and by that, you simply put up a shower curtain and finally put sheets on your mattress on the floor. You had also created a laundry list of random things you wanted to get done around the house in the next month. Priority number one was getting the bathrooms working. The toilet downstairs doesn’t stop running and your upstairs one won’t flush at all. 
You decided that today was the day you would go out and buy some furniture for your living room and bedroom. You would also inquire to some locals about a plumber. It would take you days to work up the courage to reach out to someone in the phone book, so here’s to hoping you just run into someone on the street. 
You hop into the sedan that you were renting until you could buy a car. It was nice but it was no match for your long dirt driveway. You already expected to pay extra for all the dings on the exterior. 
The roads that lead into Main Street are long and winding. You loved driving, so when it was nice enough to put the windows down, you did so. 
Since there’s no one on this specific stretch, you decide to switch the CD you had shoved into the disc drive, opting for another mix you had made years ago. The radio never played what you wanted, especially the local stations in Taylor. 
In your distracted scramble for the CD, you don’t take note of the large stallion running next to your car. The CD is wedged between the seat and the main console and your fingers cannot reach the awkward position. 
You’re not speeding. But when a giant horse runs out in front of you, you can not hit the break quickly enough. You stop breathing, bracing for impact. You jerk the wheel slightly, swerving away from the steed.  Before your front end can make an impact, the horse is snatched back towards the divot in the road. 
You are in complete and utter shock over how abruptly it all happened. 
Your eye eventually catches a man on horseback, his cowboy hat shields most of his face, but you are more focused on how built this man looks. His biceps were straining against his button-up shirt as he held the lasso taut against his chest. His legs were locked around the brown stallion he was on, his jeans riddled with mud and dust. He had dark curls that peaked out from under his hat.
“Jesus fuckin’ Christ,” You yell, your car slowly inching forward from its spot in the middle of the road, “Where did that thing even come from?”
The mysterious cowboy just shakes his head and trots away, clicking his tongue to guide the horse back into the field. 
Your heart felt like it may leap out of your chest. A car was chugging down the road ahead of you, so you knew you had to move out of the way. You turn into your lane and slowly start down the road again.
You do not even bother trying to find the CD, again. You would rather sit in complete silence. 
-
When you make it to the small stretch of downtown, your heart rate slows down. You spot a local furniture store that looks a bit dated. It was your best bet plus, you wanted to stand on solid ground and gain your bearings. 
You parallel park rather terribly and hop out of your car. You huff loudly, throwing your purse over your shoulder and slamming the door behind you. 
A hot cowboy saved your life. 
It’s the most Texas thing that’s happened to you since you moved here. 
You head inside the storefront. A smaller white-haired lady sits at the front desk, her head in a gossip magazine. 
“Well, hello there,” You muster in your best cheery voice, trying to act like you did not almost die, “I’m lookin’ for some furniture.”
She chuckles as she places her reading next to the register, “Well, you came to the right place, sweetheart.”
You return the laugh, glancing around the large store. Couches and recliners in rows in the front, wooden bed sets lining the back wall. You were so indecisive, you were not completely sure where to start. 
“I need a bedroom set and a couch or two. I just moved into th-”
“The old Caldwell farmhouse,” She cuts you off, hopping off her stool, “Saw you movin’ in a couple days ago. My boy is your neighbor.”
The joke about small towns is always true, you know that already. Everyone knows everyone else’s business. You could not shit without someone knowing about it. 
You raise your eyebrows, acting like you’re shocked she knows about you already. “Yes, that’s right. Your boy?”
“My oldest son, Joel. He lives across the way from ya,” She starts gesturing towards the couches, “Pop a squat on one and see which one ya like.”
You end up sitting on every couch before landing on a brown leather one with a matching loveseat. The old woman is a great saleswoman on top of being sickly sweet. She told you since you are one of her first customers of the month, she would give you a great discount on a coffee table. You were a sucker for a good deal. 
You knew what bed set you wanted immediately. It was a light-washed wood with tall pillars sticking out of every corner. It came with two matching dressers and one nightstand. It was only you, so you didn’t quite care about another side table anyway. 
When the lady starts tallying up your total, you watch the slow-moving downtown. A couple walking across the street into the small diner. An older gentleman walking his small dog. The rickety old trucks that loudly took up the roads. 
You’re so stuck in your head, you don’t even hear what your total is. All you do is hand over your credit card. She smiles and giggles as she swipes the card. 
“So I’ll have my boy deliver it to you tomorrow. He is busy workin’ today, but I’ll have him get it to you. He’s quite the handyman, always busy doing jobs around town. Will you be home in the morning?”
You would have to have some strange man in your home to set up the heavy wooden furniture. It made the hairs on your arm stand up. You knew you would not be able to haul it all, so you had to take the leap of faith and hope and pray this frail old lady’s son is not a serial killer. Or stalker. Or both. 
You needed your furniture, after all. 
It will be okay, you tell yourself. 
“U-uh, I will,” You swallow, “I don’t work right now, so I’ll be home all day.”
“Oh, goody! I will send him your way in the morning. He may have his brother with him just to get the bed up your stairs, but I promise they are good boys. If they aren’t, you come to me and their mama will deal with them.”
You laugh nervously, “Of course, thank you so much.”
You had woken up late, your anxiety creeping up on you last night. Your brain would not stop racing. You didn’t fall asleep until 2 am. You hop out of bed around 10:30 and wrap yourself in a cardigan. You have been leaving all the windows open at night, but you can tell the seasons are shifting because it gets so cold at night. 
The doorbell rings and it’s like your heart falls out of your chest. You know that after you open this door, you’re welcoming in someone completely new and unexpected and it makes your whole body jitter. You make your way to the front door and take a deep breath before opening it. 
Of course. It’s him. The hot cowboy. 
It made sense. The endless green across from your home had to be part of his property. The road you almost died on yesterday was right beside his land. His house was tucked right across from the end of your driveway, with countless barns spread across a couple of acres.
You were secretly hoping he would be some silly-looking hillbilly, but instead, you find out your delivery man is the ridiculously attractive cowboy from the day before. His hair is tidy and dark without the cowboy hat on. It’s peppered with some white hairs, but it only adds to his appearance. His flannel has the top three buttons undone and his jeans are stained with age. You are finally able to get a good look at his face with no shadows covering his permanent scowl. 
He had to be about 10 years older than you. You were not too far off from wrinkles, but you were still young enough to bear children without being considered geriatric. 
He squints at you when you swing the door open. The sun is hitting his eyes, highlighting the warm rich brown color. 
“Howdy neighbor,” He greets, a small smirk plays on his lips, “’m Joel. Nice to meet you officially.”
You introduce yourself, trying not to stutter as you say your name. He made you nervous. You chalk it up to just being nervous around men in general. But it’s the way his eyes trailed you as you moved just slightly.
You feel the need to clear the air because of the way he’s staring through you. 
“And uh, listen, about yesterday,” You try to apologize, but he cuts you off by raising his hand. 
“Wouldn’t be the first time an outsider got themselves hurt bein’ reckless down the backroads. Just glad you didn’t hit my horse.”
The response has a bit of a bite to it. You back up a step, your body also taken aback by his directness. You are used to confrontational people, but you’re not used to Southern folk being that way. 
“No, next time I’ll aim for the ditch and tell my insurance that there was a silly cowboy in the road that I had to miss.”
You can tell by the sheepish smile on his face that he was not expecting you to be feisty.
“Don’t think they’d give ya’ much money for that,” He says in a hushed but matter-of-fact tone.
You relax your shoulders, trying to collect yourself. “Probably not.” 
He turns back to his truck that has your bed frame in the back of it, disregarding the previous statements. “My brother is comin’ by in a few to help me get this stuff in.”
“Well, let’s not let all the air out of the house right now,” You extend the door wider for him. You are giving this man full access to your home now. You try to suppress your obsessive thoughts and instead decide that you know exactly what you can have him do while you wait. You remember his mom told you he was good with his hands, and since he wants to be snarky to you in the comfort of your own home, you would try to pick his mind about some of your home projects. “Come in, let me ask you something.” 
You begin, gesturing him into the entryway. He accepts the offer, kicking his boots off on the porch. You appreciate his thoughtfulness and for a second, you realize you may be the asshole. 
“Mama told you I was a handyman, didn’t she?”
You giggle, finding it funny that he could read the situation you were about to put him in. “She sure did.”
“She needs to stop tellin’ folks that,” His accent is so thick and syrupy, that it makes your insides tingle, “Got too many people askin’ me to fix their stuff.”
You guide him to the bathroom right off the living room and kitchen, “You know much about plumbing?”
“I’m assumin’ you don’t,” He mutters, “What do you have goin’ on?”
You point to the loudly running toilet, “This thing won’t stop running no matter what I do.”
“Well, what have you tried doin’?”
You both stand in the hallway, you looking up at him with furrowed brows, him looking down at you with anticipation. He was quick-witted, and you started to hate how much you liked it. He gave your sassiness a run for it’s money.
“I’ve flushed it a bunch of times. Cursed at it and kicked it,” He stares at you blankly. It makes your stomach roll, “Jesus, Cowboy, can you give a girl a break?”
He enters the narrow bathroom, approaching the toilet like there may be a bomb in it. He reaches towards the handle and jiggles it violently, which makes you giggle a bit. That’s exactly what you did. 
“So, why here?” He questions, squatting in front of the bowl. He continues to mess with the handle while you process his no-context question.
“What Texas or this bathroom?”
He chuckles, his smile spreading across his beautifully tanned skin. 
“You got tons of jokes, huh?” 
You don’t respond, just shrug your shoulders. He stands up, wiggling the top of the tank off the toilet. You watch his hands lock onto the sides of it, ensuring it will not drop off and shatter on the dated tile. 
“Texas,” He strains, freeing his left hand to mess with the handle. You lean against the door frame. 
You are not even sure why Texas. You just needed to get as far as you could away from New York. You did not want your past to catch up with you, and you did not want to get stuck in a city again. But you could not share all this with a random stranger. He may be in your house, looking at your commode, but you can’t completely trust him yet. 
“I just wanted a change of scenery. I always wanted a farmhouse.”
“Lots of upkeep,” He jabs, doing one more once over of the tank, “‘M thinking you may need a new float or chain. I can get my tools tomorrow and come over to fix it. May need to order a new part, though.”
You push off the wall, arms still crossed over your front. He puts the top back on and finally makes eye contact with you. 
He would come over again? To fix your toilet? 
“Are you sure?”
“Yeah, ‘m sure it’s the chain or float.”
“No, I m-mean,” You start to stumble over your words. You swallow, collecting yourself for a moment so you do not look crazy to him. “Are you sure you’re okay coming back over?”
He gives you a thin-lipped smile, “What are neighbors for?”
-
His brother arrives in a rickety old truck at about 15 past 11. He looks a lot like him, but shorter. He has those same eyes though, permanently tired. 
“Nice to meet ya, ma’am. ‘M Tommy.”
You grab his hand to shake it and he lingers a bit longer than you anticipated. Joel stayed on your front porch, putting his boots back on to start unloading the furniture. 
You are thankful the weather was kind today, especially since every evening this week has been stormy. The sun was beating mighty hard on the men as they collaborated on getting your furniture inside.
While they get everything set up, you busy yourself making lunch. You get the bright idea to make them each a sandwich. It’s the least you could do. 
You pile the cold-cut turkey and cheese onto the white bread you had, topping it with some mayo. When you hear their footsteps trailing down the stairs, you race out with the sandwiches on a porcelain plate.
“For your troubles,” You say before standing in their path to the door. Tommy smiles brightly, instantly snatching a sandwich from the plate. 
“Thanks, darlin’,” He takes a big bite, humming in satisfaction. He walks around you, leaving you standing in front of Joel. His eyes are piercing, his lips ajar a bit, but nothing is coming out. 
“Turkey and cheese, I promise.”
He reaches out grabbing the sandwich from you, “No sweet tea to go with it?”
Your heart sinks, instantly becoming self-conscious of your decision to be nice to these hicks. He was so intimidating with his steely expressions and broad shoulders. There was an essence about him that did not speak to his stone-cold exterior. It was more gentle. But you could only see hints of it when he smiled. 
He can tell the wheels in your head are spinning. Before you can speak, takes a bite of the sandwich and shakes his head. 
“‘m kidding, Yankee. Thank you, I ‘preciate it.”
You settle for letting out a long sigh and returning to your kitchen. You spend a couple of minutes, putting back all the ingredients in their proper places. 
You hear Tommy yell for Joel, his voice kind of panicked. You race out the front door and see Tommy balancing your coffee table off the side of the truck. Joel is running to his aid, the dust from your driveway kicking up behind him. You hold your breath watching Joel help him balance the wooden piece of furniture. 
“Can’t have you breakin’ your back before homecoming,” Joel fusses, guiding the legs of the table to the ground, “You know damn well Maria would have me, too.”
“Yeah, what’s a homecoming game without the head coach?”
You perk up, instantly becoming interested in the conversation that you weren’t supposed to be listening in on. The two men lift the table and start heading your way, right on the threshold. 
“You coach football?” You ask Tommy, trying not to show your excitement. You loved football, it reminded you of Sundays with your grandfather. You never got the privilege to go to an actual game, even in high school. 
“Yes, ma’am, for the local high school in Taylor. We are gonna make it to the state championships this year.” 
You glance at Joel when he says it. He rolls his eyes, “Gotta win at least one game to do that, Tommy.”
They place the coffee table right in front of your new leather couch. Tommy grunts, trying not to argue with his brother in front of a strange lady. 
He can’t help himself, though. He instantly snaps back at Joel.
“You know them boys have been practicin’ day in and day out. Why ya gotta be so negative?”
Joel places his hands on his hips, “Cause Sarah told me the guys in her grade are a bunch of dummies. I highly doubt they are ready to kick Georgetown’s asses.”
Tommy starts towards the door, “Just cause Sarah says it, doesn’t mean it’s true.”
“I believe my honor student daughter before I believe my dumbass little brother.”
You are not shocked Joel has a daughter. You are just shocked that she’s in high school. He looked too young to have a teen, but then again, he did have some grays sprouting. You cross your arms over your chest, watching Joel scoot the table across your hardwoods. 
You’re staring at his hands, trying to conjure up a wedding ring on his left finger. But there’s nothing. Maybe he did not wear it when he was working. Maybe he just forgot to put it on this morning. Maybe his passive aggressiveness towards you was simply to ensure there was distance between you and him, giving you subtle hints that he was taken. 
He finally glances up at you, stopping in his tracks when he notes your gaze. 
“Somethin’ wrong?”
You have no clue what to say because you are so trapped in your head about him. He’s a stranger, god damn it.
“N-no, everything is okay.”
“Don’t look it.”
“I just was not expecting the coffee table to look so dark against the hardwood,” you lie, pulling whatever you could think of out of your hat, “Doesn’t it look dark?”
Joel looks between the floor and the table, shifting in his stance, “Don’t know bout that.” 
“O-oh okay.”
“Alright, well we got ya all set up now,” He starts to head towards the entryway. You trail behind him like a lost puppy, “I’ll be by sometime tomorrow with that part for the toilet. I’m expectin’ another sandwich for that one.”
You grab your front door as you wave to Tommy as he heads for his truck. He smiles and gives you a head nod. Joel turns back to you, his ears perked up for a sarcastic jab from you.
  You think back to something he said to you earlier. You crack a smile, “What are neighbors for?”
PART 1 COMING SOON!
taglist (ppl who asked to be tagged): @joeldjarin @taylorsmakingfuckingmacandcheese @mysaviorjoelmiller @brittmb115 @missladym1981 @jasminedragoon
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byechristopher · 2 months
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pleaseee a fic where chris and reader meet for the first time (she's lowkey sad or some shit like that idk) and he's all starstruck by her 😞
lucky you.
–CHRIS STURNIOLO FLUFF.
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Author's note: hey y'all. I got the idea from this lovely anon (thank you for the request!🤍) and combined it with something that actually happened to me. Fate truly works in mysterious ways – so take this long, sappy story (based on true events, pft). I hope you like it! Do not copy/steal my work. :)
Warnings: long, sappy fluff. Very slight angst if you squeeze, but nothing crazy. Very long, didn't proofread!
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My mom used to always say – "that's life; when one door closes, another door opens". And if I still lived in the same house with mom, she'd know; I haven't seen an opened door in a long while. It is unfair but it is what it is and I had no intention of succumbing to tears in the solitude of my nightly despair.
Seated on the chilled bench, I instinctively drew my knees towards my chest in a desperate bid for warmth. The sheer elegance of my black tights, though adorning my legs, proved futile against the biting cold. Unfazed, I refrained from complaining; after all, they were my cherished favorites. Mascara was most likely smudged from my previous ugly crying, yet I ignored it, taking solace in my sweater's embrace.
Leaning my head against my knees, my fingers absentmindedly engaged with the laces of my shoes – a subconscious act of distraction. In the midst of this self-imposed solitude, a sudden exclamation pierced the quietude.
"Shit!" I heard a voice, someone angry. The mysterious guy threw his hat on the pavement and scoffed, his hair nearly as messy as mine. His gaze shifted towards me, a thorough assessment from head to toe, "care if I sit next to you?" he asked quickly. Without much ado, I responded with a nonchalant shrug. I didn't care, I had way more things to worry about.
I could feel him rummaging through his pockets, trying to find God knows what, he seemed upset, anxious, "want a cig?" I didn't see him, but I saw his extended arm in front of me. I don't think he was looking at me either.
"Sure." I murmured under my breath, taking a cigarette from him half-empty packet.
"Why does life have to be such a fucking bitch?" I chuckled in response, treating it more as a statement than a question. Offering another shrug, I watched as he scanned the area, likely in search of his lighter.
"If I had the answer to that, I'd probably murder this bitch." I chuckled, he chuckled too.
He held the lighter in front of me and only then did I turn my head to look at him – he was definitely not what I expected to see from what I've heard. While I didn't dwell on it for long, it seemed he did, as seconds passed without his lighter igniting. His intense pale blue eyes remained fixed on mine, and I briefly removed the cigarette from my mouth.
"Hello?" was my mascara that smudged that I scared the guy? He hasn't uttered a word.
"Oh.. sorry." he shook his head, as though attempting to shake off the reverie that had consumed him in the past few moments in his own world, "I just.. didn't expect you to be here?"
"Well.. I'm pretty sure we haven't met before. So how come you didn't expect me?.." I was confused.
"No, I mean.. you are very beautiful." he almost whispered but I caught that, and if I was just a little disconnected from reality, I probably would've blushed.
"Oh. Thank you." my lips turned into a thin line – I put the cigarette back into my mouth, grabbing his lighter instead.
He chuckled, "and I thought I didn't know how to take a compliment." he took his lighter back, taking a puff of his own cigarette.
"Don't you hear like a thousand compliments on a daily basis?" with my knees still pulled up to my chest, I embraced them tightly, resting my head against the comforting curve of my legs.
"Hm. And yet this was the best compliment anyone has ever given me." he placed a leg on the bench, just so that he'd be able to have his whole body face me.
I couldn't help but laugh, "yeah, I'm good at giving things. Not receiving."
He nodded, his hat still on the ground although he didn't seem to care, "understood.." he smiled and wow, he had a nice smile, almost contagious, "a fellow people pleaser, nice to meet you. I'm Chris."
I reciprocated with a nod and a quick smile. My name slipped off my lips swiftly, echoed by him, and I couldn't help but notice how much better it sounded when it rolled off his tongue.
"Will I ever see you again?" he looked me dead in the eye.
"Probably not." I pursed my lips, looking back at him.
He nodded as if he understood and dropped his burnt cigarette to the ground. Chris grabbed his hat and got up, offering another smile, "I believe in fate."
"I don't." I teased, smiling.
"You probably should." he shouted, already far away from me to speak normally.
What an interaction.
It had been quite a while since said interaction. Not that I thought about the guy a lot, but he definitely was in the back of my mind. Even when I was outside, he'd still cross my mind every now and then, like a nice, distant memory.
I chuckled as I gulped down my whiskey – the music was too loud for my own liking but it was a Saturday night and it'd be a pity if I stayed home once again; my friends begged and I actually like hanging out with them. I watched as my friends danced with each other, not too far away from me, as I rummaged through my purse to find the money so I could pay and leave.
"Fucking.. shit.." I cursed under my breath, turning my phone's flashlight on because the lights in that bar were bright as fuck, but apparently not enough to actually help me see.
"D'you need any help?" I heard a somewhat familiar voice shouting behind me. I turned around and my eyes widened when I saw him.
"I.. you!" I was beyond surprised, to say the least, because I was truly convinced I'd never see him again. Not because I didn't want it; but because I had enough on my plate already.
"Shit.." he whispered, and if I wasn't already looking at his lips, I wouldn't be able to know what he said, "..see, I told you fate works in mysterious ways."
"This was just a coincidence." I convince myself.
Was it, though?
"This was no coincidence and you know it.." he grinned and I let my eyes travel down his body for a few seconds – he looked best in black, ".. I need to see you again.." he muttered.
"Well, it seems you will indeed see me again." I smiled.
"Does that mean you'll give me your phone number?" he grinned and I saw his eyes do the same thing mine did to him; check me out.
I hummed, "..hmm.. no. We'll see if fate actually works." I smiled.
"You can't be serious.." he tilted his head, looking at me in disbelief, "I found you again, how can I leave when I don't know if I'll ever see you again?"
"You said you believed in fate."
I found him undeniably attractive and intriguing. However, at that moment, I realized I wasn't emotionally equipped to entertain the idea of liking someone or embarking on dates. The weight of my personal struggles loomed large, and I couldn't shake the fear that if he discovered the extent of my problems, he'd likely reject me. Hence, I concluded it was better to distance myself now rather than risk inevitable disappointment later on.
It's not like I'd see him again.
Truly, it's been more than a month since I last saw him; I did think about him way more often than usual but he still remained a nice, distant memory. A memory that was in the past and would never be in the future.
"Yo, we're leaving already? It's 2AM." my friend whined, although we were already walking down the stairs, toward the exit, with our jackets on and bags in our hands.
"No, love, we're just taking our fucking bags for a little walk." another friend replied, rolling her eyes and I couldn't help but laugh at their bickering.
Immediately after departing from the bar, he made his way out of the restaurant located directly beneath it. You have to be fucking kidding me.
"You.." he whispered, his eyes widened.
My mouth hung open, my eyes as wide as his; I really couldn't believe it this time. This couldn't be a coincidence, right?
"What.. are you doing here?" there was nothing else that could leave my mouth at that time.
"I work here.. now, you can't tell me this is a coincidence." he walked closer to me, although still keeping a distance to be respectful.
It definitely wasn't but I was still in the same mood I was back then.
"I can't tell just yet." I teased him; deep down I wished I could give him way more. But I knew I couldn't.
"Don't.. tell me.. are you not gonna give me your phone number? Again?" he chuckled in disbelief once again. I nodded.
"He better be a murderer, bitch; that's the only valid reason for you not giving him your phone number yet." shit, I completely forgot that my friends were literally behind me, staring at us; they knew nothing about this.
"Stop." I whispered to my friend and I don't think she heard me but she definitely saw the expression on my face.
"Please?" he said and I almost gave in when I saw those eyes.
I have always been self-destructive but this wasn't it, this time. It was realistic, right? I really couldn't do this; I knew he wouldn't be able to keep up with my lifestyle so I was just doing me a favor by saving myself from possible heartbreak. Right?
"I promise you now; if we meet again, I'm opening up to you. Fully. My phone number, my likes, my diskikes." I gave him a teasing smile, which he seemed happy to receive.
"Pinky promise. Now. I trust fate but not you." he chuckled and so did I.
"But you trust my pinky?" I laughed but he seemed serious, despite his playful stare. I sighed, still smiling, wrapping my pinky around his, "..promise."
This would probably never happen. It's fine.
This time, I really thought about him; dreamed about him even. That was very unlike me but it happened either way. I seemed to be doing lots of things that were unlike me lately – like going to this bar again. I wasn't going to see him but I was hoping to.
The whiskey was cold against my lips, my black dress hugging my hips as I sat down on the couch.
"Third time's the charm."
No.
I turned my head and saw Chris speaking to the friend group that were sitting next to ours; I saw them getting up and leaving, Chris replacing them.
"Oh God.. what did you tell them?" my grin was wider than usual, I really wanted to see him after all.
"That.. I needed to sit next to you. And that it was a matter of life and death." he smiled, taking a sip of his own drink.
"You're crazy."
"For you." he said, searching for something.
Before realising, I saw his phone in front of me, signaling me to dial my phone number. And of course, I did.
"So. Start. Tell me everything."
"Do you have free time?" I tilted my head, still looking at him.
"For you? Always." he chuckled.
I cupped his cheeks and pulled him closer, looking into his eyes to make sure he wanted to kiss me as well. And as soon as I felt him leaning towards me, I placed the softest kiss on his own soft lips.
"Take me home?"
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itneverendshere · 2 months
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alrighty imagine rafe feeling jealous for the first time in his life and absolutely not knowing how to navigate through it, so he just takes it out on you 🤗 he's down bad so it's funny
just a lil something for y'all:
rafe cameron does not get jealous.
why would he? he has the world at his feet—wealth, status, popularity, and seemingly limitless opportunities. got everything he wants and needs in his perfect kook-life, right? there’s absolutely nothing that could make him envious of others. he’s been moving through life with a sense of entitlement, accustomed to getting what he wants when he wants it.
that earth-shattering confidence translates into his sexual life. if there was such a thing as mastering the subtle art of not giving a fuck, god, he’d get a nobel prize for that shit. 
rafe likes to indulge in the pleasures of his fantastic mortal life without the burden of attachment of commitment, just thinking about tying himself up to someone else makes him want to drive his jeep into the nearest wall. 
that’s not the life he wants. that kind of bullshit gets people depressed or killed; he’s seen enough of that kind of misery in his lifetime. 
he knows he’s got a reputation by now. it precedes him, and he revels in it. and people say he’s a bad guy? please, he’s doing the entire female community a favor. there’s no point in restricting his independence for one person. 
no feelings involved, no clinging, and no, he’s not fucking cuddling someone after he just blew his load into their back. The women he involves himself with know what they’re getting themselves into when they open their pretty legs for him.
 it’s great. 
no stupid headaches, no fights, no “why didn’t you text me back?”, complete radio silence unless they want something from him or vice versa. sure, there have been a few girls who needed a collective reminder of his rules, which he does by always cutting them off.
no one’s ever made him want to throw his philosophy out the window. can you imagine that happening? rafe cameron…feeling…something other than complete horniness for someone else? enough to make him want to commit capital murder when someone else thinks they’re entitled to touch what’s his?
no, of course not.
that’d be insane. completely impossible. rafe cameron would never get his perfect hands dirty with filth. not in this universe or lifetime. 
or so he thought. 
“you have a real problem, you know that?”
if looks could kill he’d be seven feet under. you’re shooting daggers at him through your pretty eyes, hands settling on your hips. if he wasn’t raging with misplaced anger issues, he’d tell you how fucking beautiful you look tonight.
“me?” rafe grits out as he sticks his fingers into his chest, “you want to talk about problems, sweetheart?” his words drip with venom, a thinly veiled attempt to deflect the intensity of his own emotions.
you don’t back down, though, gaze steady and unwavering as you meet his challenge, “i’m not the one who just punched the living shit out of someone else!”
rafe's lip curl into a mocking smirk. "whose fault is that?” he quips, the barb aimed squarely at your intellect.
a violent urge to strangle him takes hold of you, anger nipping at your skin, “what the hell is wrong with you?”
he doesn’t know why he did it. all he remembers was that in that moment, while watching you entertain someone else, he wanted to snap someone’s neck in half. and he’d be damned if he didn't get what he wanted. 
rafe’s head tilts, oh so slowly, to the side, pretty blue eyes burning your skin, “i’m not the one letting some sleazy bastard get their hands under my slutty dress.”
that didn’t come out right. 
it made much more sense in his head. he doesn’t want to admit it, doesn’t want to acknowledge the gnawing jealousy that threatens to consume him whole.
“slutty dress?! this is vintage versace you possessive lunatic!”
“so fucking what?” he saunters closer, seemingly calm, except that’s the one thing that he never is, “did they run out of fabric in Italy?”
you watch him, a little mesmerized by the way the moonlight accentuates his features, heart pounding. he stops in front of you.
you must’ve taken a good hit to the head if you believe rafe cameron feels anything for you besides some sort of allure to your cunt. you know better than that. you open your mouth to speak, but rafe’s quick to lift one of his hands, tapping your lip with his finger.
“this is supposed to be like— a casual thing, right?” he exhales a breath, voice barely louder than a murmur.
you tip your chin up, “what are you getting at?’”
 “no strings. so, i really shouldn't be this fucking pissed about seeing you post a picture with that asshat face, smiling, his arm around you. that stupid fucking caption.”
straightening your posture, you don’t let his sugar-coated confession get to you, remaining silent for the time being. what’s his deal? is the devil spawn...confessing?
“speaking of photos…i just looked at a really cute one of you before, can you guess which one?”
and watch that picture be the one where you're on all fours in his truck's backseat lmao😃👀
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chvoswxtch · 2 months
Text
an adjustment
pairing: frank castle x fem!reader
summary: adjusting to a new normal with frank presents a few challenges, including one you thought you had put to rest.
warnings: swearing, lil angst, frank's voice (yes that needs a warning)
word count: 2.6k
a/n: a certain someone is making a cameo that will have a bigger role in the next chapter, but y'all know I love to tease. ;) as always, feedback is welcomed/appreciated!
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As much as the two of you wanted to stay in the cozy little bubble that existed in his cabin, reality had come knocking. Madani informed you that your place was no longer an active crime scene decorated in bodies, bullets, and blood, and Billy needed Frank for a new assignment. Some guy running for Senator had a lot of controversial opinions that pissed a bunch of people off and apparently warranted 24/7 security, and Anvil was at the top of his list for protection. Since Frank was the best at what he did, unfortunately he was at the top of that list too. Adjusting to a new normal had been…well…just that; an adjustment.
A difficult, confusing, thought consuming adjustment.
For over half of the past year, Frank had been by your side. You started and ended every single day with him. The sudden absence of his presence was jarring, and you still found yourself immediately confused when you glanced up from your computer screen to tell him something only to realize he wasn’t there. Frank didn’t always talk a whole lot, but your office suddenly felt so much more quiet and empty without him. And despite a full blown security system installed by him on your behalf, it was hard for you to feel safe in your own home with the lingering scars of what had happened etched into the walls beneath a layer of new paint. 
Frank called you at least once every day, just to hear your voice, but between both of your complicated schedules, time was not in your favor. You had spent the past three weeks adapting to Frank’s vacancy, but found yourself spiraling anytime you were left alone with your own thoughts. What if this was over before it had even really started? What if it wasn't anything anyway? There hadn’t been a moment for you and Frank to sit down and actually talk about what your relationship was since the cabin. You know what it meant to you, and you knew what you wanted it to mean to him, but you wanted to hear what it meant to him from his own mouth. 
A part of you felt childish for wanting to bring it up. What were you supposed to do? Send him a text saying “are you my boyfriend, check yes or no”? Another part of you felt valid in needing reassurance. It was reasonable to want to establish a relationship with someone you were dating. But were you and Frank dating? He hadn’t technically asked you out on an actual date, but he had risked his life to save yours on several occasions. That had to count for something. You hadn’t dated anyone seriously since Steven, and Frank was not only a widower, but also your former bodyguard, so the normal rules of dating felt like they had been completely thrown out the window.
A knock at the door abruptly pulled you out of your chaotically indecisive inner monologue, and you saw a guy that appeared to be fresh out of high school standing in the doorway of your office.
“You Y/N Y/L/N?”
“Uh yeah, that’s me. How can I help you?”
The kid took a few steps forward into your office and practically shoved a sealed brown envelope in your face. He looked bored and annoyed, as if you were somehow inconveniencing him because he had to deliver something to you. It made you want to make a snide comment about how your name was clearly listed outside your office door and ask how the hell he managed to graduate without the ability to read. 
“This is for you.”
Reaching for the envelope, your brows pinched together as you turned it over. There was nothing written on the front of it, no address, no name, not even a stamp.
“What is it?”
“I don’t know, lady. I’m just the messenger. Open it and find out.”
Before you could reply with a smartass comment, the kid had already walked out of your office, leaving you alone with the mysterious brown envelope. Clenching your jaw, you refrained from chasing him down the hall and asking who the hell raised him. Letting out a deep exhale through your nose, you had to remind yourself that you were a grown woman that would face charges for decking a teenager, even if he was legal and a complete dick.
“Asshole.”
Muttering under your breath, you pinched the aluminum prongs together on the seal, flipping the top of the envelope open to reach inside and pull out a stack of documents. When you turned them over, five big bold letters instantly caught your attention.
LETTER OF INTENT TO SUE.
During your time as a journalist, people had threatened to sue you over stories several times. It came with the territory. The first time you had gotten a letter like this, you nearly had a complete meltdown. Ben had found it far more amusing than you did, leaning back in his chair with a smug grin on his face while sipping at his coffee and chuckling.
“Ah, I remember my first lawsuit letter. You get used to ‘em. You can either frame that one or forward that to the uh legal department. It’s in the blue recycling bin outside.”
And he had been right. People had tried to sue the paper, and you specifically, several times over the course of your career, but nothing ever actually went anywhere. You normally wouldn’t have thought twice about it, and you were about to toss it into the trash bin on the floor next to your desk when your eyes skimmed over who sent the letter, and your blood instantly began to sizzle.
“You have got to be fucking kidding me.”
Steven fucking Price.
Gritting your teeth harshly, you narrowed your eyes as you read over the first paragraph on the page.
This letter of intent to sue shall hereby be considered formal notice that STEVEN PRICE intends to file a lawsuit against you if you do not comply with the settlement demands set out in this letter.
The storm of anger brewing inside you had your hands shaking violently, and you were clutching onto the paper in your hands so tightly that your fingernails had left indents in the crinkled sides that were held captive in your vice grip. When Homeland took him away in custody, you thought that was the last you would ever have to deal with him or see him until the trial. But here he was, still making demands of you, from federal prison. 
Frank’s gruff voice sounded on the other end of the line after one ring before you even realized you had called him.
“He’s fucking suing me.”
“What? Who?”
“Steven.”
There was a brief shuffling noise on the other end of the line, and you faintly heard Frank mutter an “excuse me” before his deep baritone sounded once again in your ear.
“The hell you mean he’s suin’ you?”
“Some kid came and dropped off an envelope, who was a real dick by the way, and then I opened it and saw it’s a letter of intent to sue. I didn’t think anything of it at first because I get these all the time, but then I saw his fucking name.”
“Suin’ you for what though?”
Tossing the documents onto your desk, you began to pace back and forth in your office as you ran your hand through the roots of your hair in pure frustration.
“I don’t fucking know, a load of bullshit? I didn’t even read what his ‘demands’ were. He can’t…he can’t do that, right? I didn’t do anything.”
Pausing for a second, your hysterical rant subsided momentarily as one possible reason for a lawsuit popped into your head.
“I mean…I did punch him in the face. But he’s going to sue me for that? There’s no fucking way. Putting it on public record that a girl half his size punched him? His ego couldn’t handle it.”
“You did break his nose.”
“He fucking deserved it, I should’ve broken more.”
Frank’s deep chuckle of amusement sounded from the other end of the line, and it instantly made you forget what you were so pissed about for a brief moment.
“I ain’t disagreein’ with you there. Look, take a deep breath, sweetheart. Can you do that for me?”
Letting out a deep exhale through your nose, you closed your eyes for a moment and enjoyed the soft tone of Frank’s rough voice as you followed his gentle instruction. With your eyes closed, it was almost like he was there with you. Once Frank could hear your breathing even out a bit on the other end of the line, he spoke in a delicately low tone that had your toes curling in your shoes.
“Attagirl. Send me the letter and I’ll talk to Madani ‘bout it, yeah?”
“I don’t even have a lawyer-”
“Don’t worry ‘bout that right now, alright? Just take another deep breath, relax, and let me handle it.”
“You’re always handling things.”
“That’s kinda my job, baby.”
One little pet name and you were blushing like a schoolgirl with her first crush. Thankfully Frank wasn’t in your office at that moment to see the intense heat in your cheeks and the goofy smile splitting your lips. He would’ve definitely had a field day teasing you about it.
“You’re pretty good at your job. Maybe a little too good. If you were kinda sucky at it, everyone wouldn’t want you so bad.”
“The only one I want bad is you.”
A fluttering feeling erupted in your lower belly at those words, coupled with the way his voice had dropped an impossible octave lower, and you found yourself clutching at the edge of your desk to keep your knees from giving out right from under you. If Frank was here, you would’ve gladly let him bend you over it.
Clearing your throat, you attempted to change the subject before you got too worked up. 
“How’s the new guy?”
Grabbing the iced coffee sitting on your desk, you held it against the heated skin of your neck. Droplets of the cool condensation slowly cascaded down your flesh, causing you to shiver while trying to balance your internal temperature.
“Not as pretty as you.”
Letting out a soft snort, you rolled your eyes and leaned back against the edge of your desk.
“Well I would hope not.”
Frank chuckled deeply again, and you could clearly picture the look on his face in your mind; an expression of playful exasperation with a faint smirk on the edge of his soft lips.
“He’s more of a pain in the ass than you. Didn’t think that was possible.”
“You’re really great at this whole flirting thing, you know that?”
The dry sarcasm in your voice didn’t go unnoticed by Frank, and it tore a deeper laugh from low within his chest that made you grin.
“Hey, I been outta practice for a while. Gimme a break.”
“Speaking of flirting, how’s Billy?”
“He’s uh…he’s good.”
Something about Frank’s tone suddenly seemed off, and you wanted to ask him about it, but there was a faint rustling on the other end of the line, like Frank was pressing the speaker against his chest, and you could barely make out his muffled voice speaking to someone. When he lifted his phone back to his ear, you caught the end of a deep sigh.
“Listen I uh…I gotta go, sweetheart.”
“Yeah, me too.”
That was a lie. You didn’t have anything pressing deadlines at the moment. You would’ve stayed on the phone for the rest of the day with Frank if you could’ve, maybe convinced him to sneak away and come see you. He was still in New York, luckily, but anywhere that wasn’t right next to you was still too far. 
“Send me the letter. I’ll talk to Madani and take care of it, alright?”
“Okay. I…thank you.”
“You ain’t gotta thank me.”
“You keep saying that, but then you keep giving me reasons to. So, we can have this argument until eventually you give up I guess.”
Frank chuckled deeply once more, and you could picture him in your mind shaking his head with a light grin. He sounded normal again, but you made a mental note to ask him about what was really going on when you spoke to him next.
“Same time tomorrow then, yeah?”
»»———  ———««
According to Madani, Steven didn’t have a case, and you technically had nothing to worry about. However, you were admittedly curious about what the hell he wanted, and Frank had said that if you did want to go talk to Steven, he would go with you. Actually, he respectfully insisted that you not see Steven without him present, and while you didn’t want to see Steven at all, you did want to see Frank.
You suffered through almost three years with Steven. You could suffer another five minutes if it meant you got to spend time with Frank.
It wasn’t your first time visiting a prison. A few years ago when you were still working with Ben, he had been interviewing a death row inmate that had been declaring innocence for fifteen years, and Ben had managed to prove that the evidence for his case had been tampered with and that the man had been telling the truth the entire time. Despite how daunting it felt to be in a place that kept violent people caged like animals, you felt safe with Ben then, much like you did with Frank now.
Currently, you were pacing back and forth down the hallway in pure irritation.
“What is taking so long?”
Frank had his arms crossed over his chest as he leaned against the wall outside of the meeting room that was typically reserved for inmates and their lawyers. The guard had said he would bring Steven in shortly, but that was twenty minutes ago. Since Frank had met you at the prison, and due to all the prying eyes, you hadn’t had a private moment to do more than smile at him when he arrived. It was the first time you were able to see him in person in three and a half weeks, and he somehow looked even more attractive than he ever had, and you were being forced to endure an interaction with your ex, who tried to have you killed, just to get Frank alone.
It was torture.
“Told ‘em we’re waitin’ on your lawyer.”
Pausing mid-step, you glanced over at Frank with a look of complete puzzlement.
“I don’t have a lawyer, I told you that.”
As Frank turned his head to look at you, he suddenly lifted his gaze to stare directly above your head as someone behind you caught his eye. He stood up straight and uncrossed his arms as he gestured with his chin in the direction behind you.
“You do now.”
With your brows knit in threads of confusion towards the center of your forehead, a light tapping sound behind you caused your ears to perk up, and you turned your head to find the source of the noise and Frank’s attention.
“Miss Y/L/N, my name is Matthew Murdock. I’m your attorney.”
tags: @thyme-in-a-bubble @day-dreaming-goddess @messymissy @itwasthereaminuteago @strawberry1042 @queenofthenoobs @wanda2themax @xcastawayherosx @avengerstower-houseplant @stevenknightmarc @ponyosmom35 @babygal-babygal @wellwwhynot @oldermenaremyreligion @combustiblemeow @tired-night-owl @fairykiss32 @danzer8705 @calkissed @fxckahs-blog @lemon-world1 @polskiperson @imperihoe @v4leoftears @harperdoodle @spideyvibez @joalslibrary @cherry-berry-ollie @sorrowfulfragmentation @kdogreads @sumo-b98 @blackhawkfanatic @gloryekaterina @whistle1whistle @starbritestarlite @callmebrooklynbabes @hallway5 @scarletfvckingwitch @bifuriouslatina @soupyspence @fireeyes-on-teller-dixon-grimes @wonwoosthetic @linguist-breakaribecca @nerdytreeflower @mrs-bellingham @smhnxdiii @s3riou2 @slavic-empress
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thickania · 7 months
Text
I'm going to try to be as nice as I can. If you are having full on meltdowns and panic attacks because Chris Evans got married, please seek out for a psychiatrist. And if you consume so much media, if your life revolves around a celebrity to that extent, turn off the computer, lay off the fanfic, stop consuming media with them, stop consuming fanfiction. Just stop it.
Chris didn't sell you any fake image, the fans who were here before marvel, we knew about his frat guy personality, he openly talked about what part of a woman's body he found it attractive, he openly talked about how he's always thinking inappropriate jokes, y'all made a imaginary version of him, and then got upset when he didn't fit that image. People are not a piece of paper, they are multifaced, he can easily be a party frag guy and a family guy. It's not an impossible thing,
I'm not trying to be mean, I'm genuinely worried for some of y'all. I'm going to tag this with every male celebrity with a heavy female audience and fanatics that I can think of, because it's becoming ridiculous and scary.
I was here in the 2010s, when fandom was at one of its peaks, I saw girls leaking each other's address because of fandom wars, I had my number leaked, just because I made fun of One Direction at the time, I saw girls stepping over each other at events just to get a peak of their favorite singer or actor, y'all are acting just the same, but this time is way worse, because a lot of you are full grown ass adults. I saw people threatening to hurt themselves because of this marriage. I heard that Pedro Pascal was stalked a few weeks ago, people are having public meltdowns because of Timothée Chalamet, there's still people stalking Henry's girlfriend. There are still people dissecting every single move that Zawe does. Seek professional help. Stop consuming fanfiction, don't just decrease the quantity, stop consuming it for at least 3 months.
I don't know when y'all will understand they are actors, singers, models, they are here to sell a product so we can consume their product. We can enjoy a little harmless fun sometimes, we can imagine what it would be like to be next to them, or date them, be their friend, we can imagine that, but there's a point where you have to back up, rethink your life choices and see what's missing in your life. Please seek help, immediately
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kairiscorner · 6 months
Text
the poll has spoken.
miggy and his feelings for you. (when he catches you smiling because of someone else)
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summary: what's the next step after telling someone you like them? usually, stuff like that ends in rejection–but... you didn't reject miguel when he finally expressed how he felt for you. what's next after this? he can only handle his need to love you and declare that you're his and he's yours so much before he... before he breaks.
pairing: miguel o'hara x gn!reader
genre: a bit of angst and fluff 🫂🫂🫂
word count:
a/n: i'm writing this on the date of my blog's second monthsary, HEHE, this is kind of a belated monthsary gift (or early third monthsary gift~~~) for my miguel babes out there, y'all know who you are 🤩 anyway, hope you guys enjoy !!
the rapid palpitations of his heartbeat could still be felt in every fiber of his bones, of his muscles, as he reminisced that moment when he mustered up all the courage he had and breathed out those three, four words he's been dying to utter to you, for you to hear, listen, and sink in your heart as he tells you in such a soft, sentimental tone that he can't help but let out.
"estoy enamorado de ti."
"i'm in love with you, i love you."
he has never been able to recover from the shocks and tingles sent up his spine and tickling the back of his brain every time silence settles in and consumes him. the silence is a perfect, beautiful torment for miguel; because it is the silence that reminds him of how you held him dearly, teased him for his "dramatic", "extra" showcases of affection towards you, and that he remembers every bit of how he feels around you, the love of his life. you've always seen him as a very close friend–like an annoying, overprotective brother at times in the past–but those feelings have thus shifted; and is miguel ever so grateful for that happening.
he's been so scared and lost–like a child who's afraid of the dark wandering in a pitch black room, calling out for help–he was always unsure of what to do with these secret feelings he harbored for you. he thought it'd be better to bury them, to never let you know and take that secret of his to the grave; but he knew he would forever regret that. sometimes, wanting to love and wanting to protect the one you love are two very conflicting ideas–thet don't always end in mutual agreements. and ever since you declared that you reciprocated his feelings and loved him back through your actions and words... he has never felt an even greater need to love and protect you.
miguel's got a new role in your life now, to be the man who will protect and take care of you, ensure you don't go a single day without feeling loved, that you live every day, every hour of your life being as you are–happy and comfortable with yourself, hopefully with the addition of him in the picture. miguel trusts you among everyone else in his whole life–you are the only friend he has that's stuck with him this whole time and still puts up with him, despite his hard-headedness, and does the unthinkable: love him the same way he loves you. he couldn't ask for any more, really, when everything he's ever wanted in life had been granted in the brief moment you two shared when he swore to you he'd work on being such a pain in the ass for you and not be a selfish prick.
he's spent every waking hour searching for you, wanting to hold you close to him in private and smother you with all the love and affection in the multiverse. you have to understand, now, that miguel has never felt this compelled to be with anyone before in his entire life–this is his first time wanting someone with such devotion and affection behind that desire, it's a desire with depth, with genuine emotions; and it sometimes terrifies him. he doesn't know what to do with these feelings, save for acting accordingly to what they compel him to do, so long as it is within bounds of what you want and what you're okay with. however, there are times that those feelings of his get... a bit out of hand, may come off as a bit too strong. there are some things that his feelings compel him to do without him even being able to think of the consequences until it already happened and the damages have already been done.
he feels his heart get pierced by a sharp dagger, he feels like he's getting light-headed as he watches from the monitor on his screen that beautiful, all-too familiar face that he never wants to wake up without seeing as the first person to greet him in the morning, giggle and look so close in proximity with this... random person. miguel swears he's never seen this person before, this person's not a friend of yours he knows about, nor a relative, he can tell that much–they're someone he doesn't know about; a total enigma.
and that scares miguel, because he has no idea just how happy this person makes you.
he feels a twinge of venomous envy strike at his heart, and he feels his pulse quicken a bit when he witnesses the corners of your pretty lips curve up into a smile after that person told you a funny joke, said a nice thing to you today, or... maybe... no way, you wouldn't fall for their flirting, would you? miguel asks lyla to run a background check on the person close to you, and lyla reassures miguel after doing so that this person wouldn't harm you–they were just a 'really close friend of yours'.
"and you're positively certain about that?" miguel asked her as his eyes remained glued on your delightful figure, smiling all the while as this person continued to make you all happy and a little brighter than you seemed before. he hated it. he hated it because some random person was doing his job for him, to make you the happiest you've ever been–but who was he to pry you away from your friends? he loved you and trusted your friends, that he knew of–but this person, he has no idea of who he is–and this frightens him because... he might actually lose you to them, he thinks.
"miguel, i've never heard you use those two words together in one sentence before. you're anxious about something, aren't you?" lyla asks miguel with a curious look on her face, prompting miguel to bare his fangs as he furrowed his eyebrows together and glared at the AI assistant. "just answer me." "alright, grouchy, yes–yes, i'm positively certain this person has no intention of hurting them." lyla replied as miguel placed his palm on his face and rubbed his eyes clean of the frustration he was experiencing right then and there, only for it to return on his face with a scorching heat filling his frame the longer he thought about you smiling around this person.
miguel turned the monitors off and decided to distract himself with some missions, though you never left that spot in his mind and heart once as he fought anomalies and tracked the statuses of other universes. his other teammates believed he was acting pretty strangely whenever he'd go out and fight the anomalies; he'd act more brutal and less cautious than he usually would, bringing the anomaly to the brink of death at one point until peter b and jess had to intervene and contained the anomaly for him.
miguel had to sit the next mission out, and so, he was holed up in his office again, begrudgingly so. "either you tell us what's going on, or you're not coming on anymore missions." "no, that's stupid, i will be going on the next o–" "you're posing as a threat to the anomalies, a lethal one, and that's not like you." jess berated miguel like a mother chiding her son for having a temper tantrum. miguel sighed and leaned his head against his hand, his elbow propped up on the control panel to support his head. jess sighed and peter b entered the room once things cooled down. "hey, so... what's his deal?" "no clue." jess replied to peter b with a shrug as miguel slumped over on his desk, sighing to himself repeatedly as thoughts of you refused to leave his mind.
you were like an endless memory miguel wanted to relive forever, and he never wanted you to leave his mind, actually–but he knew he'd go crazy without properly talking to you about this, but the thought of that alone was killing him right now. he felt so helpless and pathetic, he couldn't even talk to the love of his life about what he was so afraid of... and now, the others had to pick up after his scattered, broken pieces. "what if we have them talk to him?" "with him being in this state? yeah, no, not the best idea." "c'moooon, they're the end all, be all solution to his little slump. i know, because mj is–" "alright, alright, i get it; save your hopeless devotion for mary jane later. call them up now, we need to go on the mission, parker." jess told peter as he smiled and contacted you to come over to miguel's office right then and there, with the very important reminder that miguel was: 'in a terrible slump and needs some love and affection to be cured.'
after a few minutes, miguel heard the doors to his office slide open, and the clacking of a couple of familiar heels were heard; before you could even speak, miguel immediately knew it was you. call it creepy or weird if you want, but miguel can't help but memorize every detail of you, because it's the mere thought of you that keeps him going–but the thought of you... leaving him, that's enough to stop him from even wanting to go on. miguel spoke out your name in a gentle whisper, but afterward, he immediately shied away from you–hiding his face in his hands again as you approached him.
"mig, what's wrong?" you asked him, and the sound of your melodic voice filling his ears made him go mad with affection for you but also ridden with guilt all over again as he remembered just how angry he was at that person making you smile and... at you, for being happy with someone who wasn't even him. of course, that anger towards you fizzled out quickly, but he can't help but feel awful that he can't be fine with letting you be happy with someone who isn't even him. "...nothing's wrong." he lied in a soft grumble. you folded your arms over your chest and raised an eyebrow up at him. "right, well, you looking like a sad, droopy-eared dog while hunching your back and burying your face in your palms when i'm not looking is the definition of something being wrong." you pointed out, making miguel bury his face in his hands even more at how right you were. "what are you even doing here?" "peter called me." "that pendejo... well, why'd you agree to come anyway?" he asked you as he turned to look at you with softened eyes, eyes that appeared to be on the brink of sobbing.
you pulled up a chair and sat close to miguel, so close that your knees were touching his own–making him look up at you in surprise. "because you've been avoiding me all week." you remind him, and that very fact made miguel tense up. he gradually turned his head to look at you with an evidently pensive look on his face, which was rare for him since he didn't really show much emotion... except to you, his beloved partner. being his partner gave you the privilege to see all sides of him–the good and bad sides–whether he likes to or not; and having been together with miguel for a while and being his friend for the longest time, you could tell something was wrong. "i'm... sorry, i'm just..." miguel muttered under his breath with a sigh as he rubbed his eyes again with his hand. you gently took his other hand in your own and interlocked hands with him, making him jolt up and turn to look at you in surprise.
you sighed and ran the pad of your thumb over the back of his big hand, thinking of what to tell him as you just held on to him closer and tighter. "is it about my friend?" you asked him softly as miguel tensed up even worse again. miguel's lower lip trembled and he took in a deep breath. "...n-no, why would... well, o-okay, yes, it is. h-how'd you..." "you were always the jealous type, mig." you tell him with a grin as miguel looked down in shame, but you placed your other hand on the side of his face and lifted his head up a bit to look at him. "but, i know you're not like this to hurt them or me. you love me, right? well... i definitely love you, too, unconditionally." you tell him in a whisper as you bring your face closer to his own shy one. you could see the signs that he was getting more and more flustered and embarrassed. "mi vida, i... don't deserve you. who wants such a jealous, overbearing, overprotective guy as their lover? i-if i can't trust them with you, then... can i even trust myself to make you happy?" miguel rambled as he felt his breath getting ragged and his grip around your hand tighten.
you leaned over and kissed miguel's plush lips, effectively answering his question. "yes, miguel–you are trustworthy, you are worthy of having me." you reassured him. you pressed your lips against his again, making him moan gently through your kiss and mumbling your name. "cariño... i'm sorry, still... i'm just... just really jealous, and i... wanna make you the happiest person in the world." he muttered to you, sighing. you wrapped your arms around his neck and held him close, patting his shoulder and shushing him. "you already do though... miggy, i want nobody but you, you and your sweet, jealous ass." you plant a kiss on the top of his head as you said that, making him even more heated up in the face and shy. "i can assure you, nothing bad's going on between us–they told me a few funny jokes that made me grin, but... i smile even wider when you're being all adorable like this with me. they're just a friend, and you're... the love of my life." you told him with a smile as miguel looked up at you, his hazel brown eyes gazing up at your own and concentrating on your pretty orbs.
"it's okay to be jealous, but... know that in every universe, i'll choose you and only you as my lover. you're perfect, miggy, you're all i want and need." and the minute you tell him all that... he feels his world slowly come together again, and his mood instantly lifting. he gently wrapped his arms around your waist and pulling you closer to him, making him lowly sigh in relief. "and you already know i want and need you the most... no soporto estar sin ti amor... i can't live another day not being with you..." he murmured to you as an oath, an oath to not hurt you ever again, to not let his emotions overwhelm him and make you feel forgotten or guilty over something you didn't do, and... an oath to you that he loves you more than anything or anyone he's ever loved before.
he can't stop being jealous on instinct, he'll sometimes get insecure and anxious about himself, but... he loves you, that much, he knows; and you... you love him dearly, too. he just needs you to keep going and to keep feeling worthy and happy; you are enough for him, and he will always, always let you know that you are all he loves and cares about, in his own little and big ways and words–because... you love him like that, he makes you happy like that, and you couldn't ask for more.
tags !! @miguelswifey04 @hearts4gabri @hisachuu @wreakingmarveloushavok @fictarian @yuridopted0 @simsrandomstuff @luvstarrstruck @popeheywardssecretgf @meeom @arachnoia @melovetitties @fable-library @ophanimgold @smokeywhalee @capnshtfce
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starryknight-tarot · 3 months
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𝓐𝓭𝓿𝓲𝓬𝓮 𝔂𝓸𝓾 𝓷𝓮𝓮𝓭 𝓽𝓸 𝓱𝓮𝓪𝓻
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pile 1 -- > pile 2 pile 3 -- > pile 4
my masterlist<3 . paid readings
Howdy my beautiful souls✨ I'm officially back! It feels like it has been forever since I last worked on a pac for y'all! Thank you all for the messages wishing for my health, I am feeling much better. Today we will be looking into advice you need to hear! I might be a little blunt so keep that in mind. Remember to meditate, take a deep breath, and pick whatever pile calls to you the most. My readings are meant for everyone, no matter what sexuality or identity you are. Since this is a general reading, make sure to take what resonates and leave what doesn't. Credit to @chachachannah for the divider!
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Pile 1 Cards: Ace of Pentacles rx, Page of Swords, The Devil, The Star, King of Wands, Seven of Cups, Two of Pentacles, Queen of Pentacles Back of the Deck: Page of Wands
There is a lot to go over here Pile 1, you may have been going through it recently or things may feel pretty chaotic for you right now. For you guys, there are somethings you may be turning a blind eye to and opportunities you haven't been taking. Right now you need to take some time to plan and TAKE ACTION! Think about what you want and what you need to do to accomplish this task. And while this is time for action, be careful not to overwhelm yourself with responsibilities, or rush into anything without properly thinking it through. You may be putting yourself down, thinking whatever you want is impossible or out of reach, it isn't. In fact, I heard it's right in front of you or hidden in plain sight. There may be negative affirmations that you are either hearing from yourself or someone else and it is only pulling you further from your goals when you listen to these words, absorb them, and view them as fact when they aren't. You need to keep in mind the power of words and how they can not only effect you, but the people around you. I heard "when you go around with a loser mentality, you are only going to get a loser result" so even in situations where you feel like you are going to lose or that something won't be successful, you need to try to think positive anyway. I know that isn't the easiest request, however, actively reminding yourself of your positive affirmations and staying determined to keep trying when things get hard can take you further than you ever thought you could go. Use your creative brain and I heard be willing to use your heart in certain situation. With the Seven of Cups, there may be a situation or even a person around you that isn't what you think. Be aware of signs that things don't entirely add up or make sense. For some of yall, this is going to be about a travel destination or someone may be offering something that isn't real. With the Devil energy, you may have an unhealthy addiction to something, for some of you I am hearing your phone or social media (who isn't now a days). You may have been consuming too much media and it is really taking a toll on you. Whatever the addiction is, this can go two way for you, you can take the proper action to help yourself or keep hurting yourself by not getting the help you need. Pile 1, you have so much potential and abundance that can be coming your way if you would just believe in yourself!
Advice Cards:
Be bold. It's time to lead forward!
Release what you do not need. Let go of some extraneous aspect of your life
It's time to challenge old beliefs!
Release all attachments that do not serve you
Complete the project or task. Something is calling for closure
Create an internal structured frame of reference and stay focused
Channeled Songs:
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Pile 2 Cards: Knight of Swords, Temperance, The Empress rx, Nine of Swords rx, Knight of Wands, The Emperor, Ace of Wands rx Back of the Deck: Ten of Wands
For my Pile 2, we need to talk about how you see yourself and your own self-confidence. I actually feel like this group is divided into two groups, some of you need to work on your confidence and how you interact with yourself. You may be putting yourself down and you need to stop it! You have wonderful energy Pile 2 and deserve love and compliments just as much as others! You just need to see what everyone else sees. You are refusing people because you may have been taught that complimenting yourself shows signs of selfishness and narcissism, something along those lines. It isn't true, you are talented and strong and deserve all the compliments and praise you receive! For the second group of you, I actually want to say to keep it up and don't give up! You may feel a little out of inspiration and creativity but you may just need time to process your thoughts and really figure out what you need to do! Stay confident and positive in your work! I heard this confidence and outgoing nature is your greatest ally. In the moments that you feel like you can't get anything right and things seem impossible, remember who you are! You are that bitch! The sky is the limit for you Pile 2. You can do it, you just need to trust in yourself, beware of last minute nerves that sneak up on you and make you doubt yourself. Also don't be afraid to take bold action and maybe even trying your hand at a leadership position, you have what it takes you just need to believe in yourself. I think that is a big message here for my Pile 2s, believing what you want is possible and just doing it. I know that sounds like a hard task but I really feel like for my Pile 2s, you guys don't even realize your potential and it almost physically hurts me. Some of yall also need to take a step away from worrying about your appearance, it is only hurting you in a really unhealthy way. My Pile 2s are so beautiful inside and out and shouldn't forget that. You may need to work more on your divine masculine energy, regardless of your gender. (There is a little similar energy to Pile 1 so if you felt called, please do read Pile 1)
Advice Cards:
It is time to take appropriate action
A rite of passage allows you to move forward into new realms
Weigh your situation carefully
Give yourself your own approval
Create a plan and take the first step
Give up resistance in your current situation
Channled Songs:
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Pile 3 Cards: King of Swords rx, Nine of Cups rx, Page of Wands rx, Nine of Wands, Two of Swords rx, King of Pentacles, Four of Wands, Eight of Wands rx Back of the Deck: Five of Wands
I think for my Pile 3's, you need to stop being so strict on yourself, I am also hearing that you need to surrender to something. There may an event or situation that you have been avoiding for a long time now and spirit is saying that it's time to face this and accept the result. This may be something that you feel pushes you farther from your goals or you are just afraid of the unknown of the situation, something along these lines. I am hearing that even if the situation seems like it is bound to end badly, the result isn't going to be as bad as you think, it may even end with a pretty good result! I am also getting that for some of you, you are going to or are currently facing a tough decision that is making you stressed and anxious, especially if this decision feels really important, I think spirit wants you to follow your heart with this decision. With the King of Swords, I feel like following what seems logical in this may have a more harmful result then you would have liked. But also remember that you have time, with this decision but also just in general. There is time, life feels like it moves very fast but it may help you to take some time to slow down. I am feeling a breeze and I'm seeing you in nature, feeling a nice breeze blow through your hair. You may want to connect with nature more, I am hearing for some of you, you may just need to take a little walk. I feel like for my pile 3's, you may want to be more generous with yourself. If there is something you have been thinking about buying, buy it. If you have something you've felt would be selfish of you, be a little selfish. I think you need to spoil yourself a little more. I am hearing especially going into this new year. Life is too short not to take some risks is what I am hearing. I'm also hearing some of you need to be a little more delusional lmao. Some of yall should listen to some subliminals, this might be a little helpful in some of your situations. I also want my Pile 3s to beware of conflicts with others, I am hearing some of you could be nicer to the people around you or that you may need to work on admitting when you are in the wrong.
Advice Cards:
Control is an illusion. Surrender and allow the Universe to guide you
Align your body, mind, and spirit with your heart
Create a plan and take the first step
It's time to realize the blueprint of your soul
Be aware of your inner messages
Be adventurous. It's time to go for it!
Channeled Songs:
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Pile 4 Cards: Page of Swords, Four of Pentacles, The Chariot, The Hanged Man rx, Knight of Swords, Justice rx, Nine of Swords rx, King of Swords Back of the Deck: Nine of Cups
There is a lot of swords energy for this pile! The swords has a lot to do with communication and possible conflicts in that. I think for a good amount of this pile, you guys need to work on how you communicate but mostly with how you communicate with yourself. I feel like you guys may be putting yourself down and saying things to yourself that aren't even true, and some of you even know that they aren't true. You guys need to realize that you are stopping yourself from achieving things, I don't care how many excuses you may have. Some of yall are manifesting and trying to say all the positive affirmations to bring the things you want to life, however you are forgetting that positive affirmations are only a part of manifestation. One of the most important parts is to actually put in the work to get the things you want. The things you want aren't just going to fall into your lap, you need to push yourself and try new things to get what you want, even if it seems scary at first. Like, I feel like you guys may be telling yourself things to delay taking action on your passions and it's not bringing you any closer to your goals. Which is sad because we have the Nine of Cups at the back of the deck, your dreams are a reality and can come true! For some of you I feel like it won't even be that far from you but you are delaying it! I can see the visual of you feeling like you have chains attached to your legs, these chains representing your past, family, doubts, all of it, they feel so heavy and scary. But what you don't realize is that these chains aren't holding you down at all, you have the power to push through and move forward. I am also getting for some of yall, you may have just went through a bad breakup or ended some sort of relationship, take it how it resonates. But I feel like a lot of you are holding onto this person and want some sort of closure from them, and spirit is saying that there just isn't going to be some closure, at least on their end. Sometimes we meet people, and they break our hearts and some people don't have the emotional maturity to deal with it in the rights ways and that person isn't you. It can feel empty and sad not to get closure on some relationships but what's stronger and harder is to know to walk away when things are getting bad. There will be people that come into your life that will treat you better, that person just wasn't that person. You guys need to remember that you are smart and wise and soooo powerful!
Advice Cards:
Hold your life from a sacred viewpoint. Witness the universal picture
The issue at hand is about reflection. What is the mirror showing you?
Put your tasks and goals in order
Something you've planted is coming to harvest. Results are forthcoming!
Boldly imagine what you can do and be
You are ready to receive your fortune. Be miracle minded!
Bring something new into your life!
Channeled Songs:
Thanks for tuning in₊‧.°.⋆🫧•˚₊‧⋆.
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bugeater101 · 1 year
Text
Mismatch
Synopsis: What began as a spa getaway takes a weird turn when Seungmin notices something interesting about the view from his room. Though his interest in the scenery plagued him with guilt, he couldn't help but be consumed by it. Soon, the getaway becomes even stranger when you make an offer he can't possibly refuse. Who is he to say no?
Content: Seungmin x Reader, perv!Seungmin (like a lot omg), Seungmin is so desperate for the reader it's pathetic, a bit of angst (in the setup, which is long), voyeurism, masturbation (m. receiving), teasing, oral (m. receiving), mutual/forced masturbation, nipple play (f. receiving), praise!kink, vaginal penetration, no use of a condom (PLEASE wear protection every time!), creampie, aftercare
Word Count: 9.6 K (I'm sorry)
Author's notes: Okay... first Seungmin fic!!! Y'all better not let me down I literally put my heart and soul into this! A good portion of this fic is the setup but then the smut hits kinda hard ngl. also aggressive use of italics sdfhkjshdk. I barely read over this because I've been reading like 100 pages a day during reading week, so I'm sorry if there are more mistakes than usual! As always, minors do not interact!
Taglist: @scribblemetae @mygsis, @9900z @taekbokki, @imtoooyoungforthisshit
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If there was one word to describe Seungmin, it was reserved. There were other terms, too: devilish, mischievous, stubborn. But "reserved" seemed the most fitting. You, however, were different, and incredibly so. You weren't exactly bubbly, but you were loud—and just as stubborn—as Seungmin. As such, all chances were against you being friends. He, who hated loudness, and you, who despised stiff reservation.
But what could you say? Opposites attract.
The two of you as a duo are fun; it simply works. While Seungmin made snide and humorous comments at the expense of others, you would make his grievances obvious through your boastful laughter that drew all attention to you. And, when you whispered your intense hatred of something to Seungmin, he would nod quickly beside you and support your wrath, giggling slyly. Of course, your relationship was more than just your guys' hot-headedness—though it was just what drew you two together.
Seungmin and you recognized what your relationship was really like: it was the comfort of finally finding someone who understood you, being able to hug someone when no one else's body felt like they fit against yours, or even being able to have someone comprehend an entire sentence held within a mute and fleeting glance. Simply, you two were best friends in the truest of terms.
What complicated the matter was Seunmin's inflexibility. His obtuse nature extended to all parts of his life, and that included his feelings for you.
...well, his lust for you, frankly.
It was insatiable. The chemistry between you two was unmatched, and no one could deny it. Hell, most of your friends thought you were already dating until you laughed at the very notion of dating Seungmin.
And it broke his heart every time you did it.
So, he pushed away every feeling toward you that was not platonic. No, it was more than that. It was not just a mere rejection of his feelings, but an utter renunciation of them. He could not bear to have his heart broken every day by you, with every glance that didn't linger on him or how your touch never seemed to stay for long. So, rather than sidebar his feelings and leave them for another day, another person, or even pretend like one day he will get over them, he instead got mad, furious at the thought of liking you. His desires were replaced by a stern voice that told him "how could she ever like you?" or "no one will ever look at you like you're pretty, like they would want you." The voice sounded eerily similar to his own.
Sadly, this voice made his emotions somewhat okay to control. There were easy days, like the days you were not around or days when you were mad at him. Then there were the other days. Days where he couldn't get you out of his mind, days when you were just a little too nice or dressed a little too scantily to evade his thoughts. Days when the tightness of his pants became unbearable.
Today was one of those days.
The spontaneous overnight spa trip now seemed like a foolish getaway attempt to Seungmin. Originally, he had planned it for just you and him—two friends that longed for a quiet escape from the city and the incessant teasing from close acquaintances. Then the two friends became four, and now it was you, him, and the seven idiots he called his friends.
His emotions were running amuck. He was now stranded—is that the right word for this kind of situation? Stranded? He certainly felt like it. This weekend was supposed to be just you and him. Separate rooms, but still together in the hot springs, getting couples massages, eating lavishly—the works. It was his feeble attempt at obtaining some semblance of a romance with you, even if it was all just pretend. Now seven fools were ogling you while he couldn't even get a second of your time.
Not to mention the logistics issues. Oh, fuck the logistics of this trip. The spa was overbooked and thus added to the absolute disappointment of this weekend. Though he advised that you should get your own room as you were the only girl on the trip, you were adamant about having to be alone while everyone else got a roomie. That's how Seungmin got stuck with you. You two were the closest in terms of friendship, and now he had to share a bed with you. He had to deal with you being so close every night. Just within grasp, your scent flooding his system, so precious and close and just inches away from him. God. This weekend was going to be torture.
Hell, it already was. As soon as the group got to the resort, everyone bolted to get to the hot springs—including you. Yet, Seungmin said he'd rather get settled into his room ("our room" you emphasized with a crafty smile), order room service, and sleep the night away. You pleaded with Seungmin to join you guys, even if you would be in the separate women's section. He just shrugged you off. He needed to be alone, to realize how much of a mistake this weekend was, to wallow in his self-pity while you enjoyed the onsen. At least he had some peace of mind knowing a giant bamboo partition separated you from the men's section and, therefore, the boys. They couldn't stare at you then, enjoying you in a bikini—or less considering this was a rather "traditional" spa. Seungmin was satisfied knowing that they couldn't see you so vulnerable, even if it meant he couldn't either. Plus, you seemed pretty excited about the springs, and even if he was jealous, he wasn't going to try and hold you back.
So, now he was alone. Everyone's rooms were now abandoned, minus their carelessly unpacked luggage. Seungmin, however, had spent the last 30 minutes tediously unpacking, refolding, and placing the three days and three nights' worth of clothes into the sturdy drawers of the spa. What a way to spend 30 minutes. It was late, the sun dusting the horizon and the last light was trickling into Seungmin and your room. He knew you would stay out long considering the water would stay warm and the spa open for hours more, so he knew he had ample time to wash up and make himself at home.
Yet, the darkness of the night made him realize that his room was now on full display due to the open curtains. Upon realizing this, Seungmin grew embarrassed realizing that he was completely visible to the outside world. So, he busied himself by locking the windows, shutting the blinds, and enjoying the views of the spa that he was able to see from his room. When he was all done, he gave a quick scan over the room and noticed something peculiar: he had missed a window! The window was short in height but long horizontally long, sitting above the headboard of your shared bed and allowing the last of the sunlight to coat the room. With a sigh, Seungmin clamoured onto the bed and sat on his knees to fiddle with the drawstrings, hoping to successfully pull the blinds shut in one go.
But he didn't.
And luckily he didn't.
Because that's when he saw you.
He didn't know his room had such a view. A view that made his head spin and his mouth salivate.
He was a pervert but fuck was it worth it. Maybe staying behind was the most brilliant idea he's ever had.
This spa emphasized discretion on its website, saying all guests had complete privacy and that the staff were well trained. Now, he was so happy that had been a lie. This window was practically offering him a view into heaven. In just the smallest edge of the glass, only at an angle, he was able to spot due to his precarious position, he realized he had a slim view of the hot springs. The women's hot springs. And the only woman in his view was you. Completely naked.
He silently thanked the architect of the spa and promised to create a whole religion dedicated to him as the Messiah.
The steam from the onsen had obscured some of his view, but he was still able to sit just strangely enough to see you fully. Your hair was sopping wet from the water, skin glistening with its rejuvenating properties. Every breath you took manifested as clouds above your glowing lips, the stark contrast between the cold air and the hot water evident in the air.
His phone was just across the room, so near and just close enough that he could stumble, grab it, then snap a few pictures. Just a few, and maybe a video, and also a pair of your panties to finish the present to himself.
Regardless, he stayed planted on the bed. He couldn't risk leaving, not even for a millisecond. His eyes absorbed all they could and he prayed his mind didn't erase anything too essential to his survival as it made room for these fucking memories of you. But didn't matter though. If this image—you in the spring, naked and soaked in water with steam clouding, making you appear like a siren—was all that his mind had room for, he would gladly accept a life of stupidly if it meant only carnally thinking of you.
He imagined how perky your nipples must be due to the coldness of the air. Part of him hoped you would tell him later how satisfying the water was on your tits, how its warmth felt like soft lips sucking on your nipples and how the cold air was nipping at the buds. Like if someone was playing with you, desperately trying to make you cum just by latching onto your leaking, raw nipples.
"Please get up, please sit up," he found himself muttering quickly. His knuckles were white as he gripped the windowsill and his jeans constrained him like a cage. "Please, please y/n, baby, please just for me, for Minnie, just sit up."
It was as if you had heard him. Or, if God had finally answered his prayers.
It was just a moment, a simple second where you were readjusting your sitting position. And it was the best second of Seungmin's life. Your chest lifted from the water, droplets cascading down your breasts as they lifted from the water. The frigid air had pebbled your nipples and you slightly shivered as your body emerged from the water. Your tits looked so soft, so sweet and supple that Seungmin seriously thought he could cum just looking at you. His tongue watered at the sight of your flushed skin, imagining what it would look like as he dried you off and applied lotion to you after your bath just to keep you so soft for him. You were so perfect, so sweet and just out of his arm's reach,
Then, just like that, your chest was submerged again, and you were back in the water.
By the time you had sat fully back down, Seungmin was already undressed and stumbling into the bathroom.
That's how he got here, ashamed and pumping his dick as his skin was pricked with boiling water. Hot water poured from the shower head and rained down on Seungmin's frame, coating his goosed skin in heat. Steam had filled the bathroom, fading the glass and leaving the man in a dream-like fog. The warmth did little to satiate his hunger, but it made it so much easier to imagine he wasn't there, to imagine that you were with him. To fantasize that you were "helping" him right now.
He wished that the water from the onsen went right into this tap. If that were the case, he would rejoice in sharing the same water as you, as your tits and cunt and ass and mouth and tummy and thighs. Fuck you were perfect. Seungmin kept imagining you, in the spring, lightly flicking or pinching your nipples. What if you didn't care that other women were in the bath with you? What if you started cleaning your cunt, rubbing the water on the outside before deciding to slip a finger or two in? He was sure there were some definite... aphrodisiac effects of the spring, and surely you couldn't resist them. What if they had begun to suck your tits in front of all those women? Nipping at them and leaving purple bruises, letting the heat of the water touch where his hands couldn't?
The grip on Seungmin's dick was tight and he pumped vigorously, willing an orgasm out of himself as he thought of you below him. Would you be the kind of girl to pump his cock with your chest and suck the tip, or would you use both hands and jack him off? Seungmin's mind couldn't decide and opted to flash between fantasies as he grunted and moaned with each tug. He approached his orgasm quickly, clenching his jaw at the pain of cumming so fast.
"Fuck, y/n, fuck fuck fuck—mmh," he whined through gritted teeth as he finished all over his hands and the wall, cum washing away and being wasted down the drain instead of being swallowed by you.
He tried to catch his breath but the steam had overtaken the bathroom. The heat, additionally, made his sensitive cock twitch, and Seungmin whined a little louder than he was comfortable with. The pitiful orgasm barely satiated him and left his dick red, aching, leaking, and begging for more. His overly needy tip prayed for another release, a stronger one, one that voided all dirty, perverted, fucked-up thoughts in his mind. It was still hard, his cock slapping against his stomach as it leaked cum from his orgasm and precum for the promising next one.
Yet, Seungmin didn't have it in him. Despite the pain of the stimulation he desperately needed making him hiss, he couldn't will another climax out of himself even if he really did try. Plus, he felt dirty. He kept imagining your tits and how pretty they would look pressed against the shower wall, the chilled textured tile and teasing your nipples when he couldn't. While you were pushed against the wall, he'd be fucking you from behind. Desperately rutting into you, ass jiggling with every snap of his hips into yours.
These thoughts continued to run through his head. And though he knew that if he fucked his hand again that they would leave, he couldn't do it. It was already so wrong, so fucking deliciously wrong to spy on you—even if your body did look amazing and the memory of it made him salivate. But, you were still his friend. He didn't want to be this guy, the one who jacked off to the person he was desperately in love with, the one who would rather fuck his friend than try to move on. It was a mistake, a sin even, and one he has committed numerous times. Another tug on his poor dick would just add to his roster, though he knew he was already damned for sure.
So, he shut the water off and let his cock stand proudly against his strained abs, the water on his body instantly turning cold and trickling onto his tip. He seethed at the feeling. Shame mixed with an insatiable carnal desire made him tense, but there was little he could do about it. He simply slid out of the shower, dried off, and slipped on one of the spa's robes, the knot securing the robe as well as his cock as it pressed into his abdomen.
Then he remembered where he was: the monogrammed name of the spa on the robe scratched against his raw skin. And you were sharing a room with him. And you could be right outside the bathroom door.
The thought made his heart drop.
The shower made him lose track of time, and you'd surely be back by now. He hoped you didn't need the bathroom. He hoped, prayed you hadn't heard him if you were out there. Though he was already tense from the guilt, he was now completely stiff (especially his cock) at the thought of you in the room.
However, he knew he couldn't spend all night—all weekend, for that matter—in this bathroom. So, he readied himself to open the door. Deep breath in, deep breath out. The handle was cold against his palm as he twisted the door open.
He was greeted with an empty room. The only evidence of life was his carelessly thrown clothes and the ruffled bedsheets from his voyeuristic adventure.
"Oh, thank god," he sighed under his breath.
"Seungmin!"
"What the—? Fuck!" Bodies toppled over as you launched yourself at Seungmin after hiding behind the door of the bathroom. You had got the better of him and he paid the price, now laying face-down on the floor with you straddling his waist and sitting on his back.
"Got you!" You giggled as you playfully shook his shoulders.
"Yeah, yeah," he stammered out. "You—you got me." He was nervous; on edge from the scare, and because his still-hard and dripping cock was pressed against the floor and his ajar robe. Fuck, it must've slipped out when you tackled him. AND FUCK, you're still on top of him! Your hands slid on top of his wrists, playfully restraining him against the wood flooring. But Seungmin felt all but unserious in this situation. Your weight felt heavenly on his back, your chest grazing the back of his head due to your precarious position, making his mind race, and your fat thighs hugged him, making him fantasize about them wrapped around his head while his hungry, wet tongue lapped up your cunt.
Not to mention what you could do to him in a situation like this.
"Get up, Minnie! It was just a joke," you tease with your mouth next to your ear, which he hoped wasn't scarlet red.
"I would get up," he grumbled, "if you weren't pinning me to the ground." He had to compose himself. He had to make it seem like he was normal, like he wasn't just vigorously tugging on his length to the glistening, exposed, vulnerable, beautiful, and soaked body of his friend. Like he wasn't fantasizing about all you could do to him right now. He had to. He had to be normal.
"Okay," your tone suggested you rolled your eyes, but Seungmin couldn't tell. "I'll get off if you hate it so much," you fake-pouted.
Jesus. Seungmin needed to see your lips when you pout like that. They always would push out just enough and would look so swollen and kissable. Too bad he was trapped under you, your plush form, with thighs hugging him.
Then, suddenly, it was lost. Almost as quickly as you had jumped him, he was relieved of the delightful pressure of you pinning him down. He almost wanted to call out, ask you to stay, to trap you under him forever. Instead, he sat up on his knees, making sure to tuck his cock discretely into his robe, and rubbed his neck.
"Jesus, you might've hurt me when jumping on me like that," he groaned. You laughed and jumped onto the bed, bouncing on impact.
"Well, then thank god we're in a fucking spa resort and you can get a massage."
In mirroring your sarcasm, Seungmin rolled his wide eyes and shifted on the ground. He sat with his knees together, protecting his nudity from underneath.
You, however...
He just noticed you. He didn't notice it before but...
Wow.
You were like him. Only wearing a robe. Nothing else, not even anything underneath.
He could tell, your nipples were perking up deliciously under the constrained soft cotton of the complimentary robe. Due to your figure, it was cut short on you. Your robe rested just at thigh-high level and hinted at the possibility of you not wearing panties. Your legs were crossed tightly, too, and the robe had ridden up to expose the part of your leg that just rested under the fat of your bum. The water from the hot spring still lingered in your damp hair and your skin glistened from the spring's refreshing properties. Your whole body looked so tender, soft, ready for Seungmin to bury himself in. You leaned back on your hands, legs still crossed, and studied the dumbstruck boy that sat beneath you.
"See something you like, Min?" You smiled.
"What?!" Seungmin yelped. Were you serious? Was this real flirting? Were you actually saying such suggestive things to him?
Of course not. The laughter that erupted from you was evidence of that. At least he could relish in the sound of your sing-song giggles and then lament in his embarrassment.
"I'm kidding," you chuckle. "You just seemed so out of it!"
"Yeah... I don't know, maybe it's because I've been cooped up in this room since we got here," he stiffly responded.
"Shit, sorry. I knew you wanted to be alone but maybe I should've pushed harder for you to use the spring or something," you pondered. "Maybe I should've stayed and helped you unpack."
No, Seungmin wanted to shout, Please, stay out there. Spend the whole vacation in the spring. Soak your tits until they are red from the water, until they're swollen and sensitive and can't take another second of the heat. Please stay outside my window for me, my own personal little pornstar. Me, just me.
"No, you wanted to use the spring and I needed time alone," he answered quietly.
You nodded. "Is that it? I swear there was something else going on with you today."
Then you uncrossed your legs, still leaning back on your hands. Your thighs hid your cunt, depriving Seungmin of its beauty so he couldn't even sneak a glance.
However, your position made his mind race faster. Maybe he could just pull your legs apart. In this position, he didn't need to untangle your knees to see your pussy. Maybe, just maybe, he had the swiftness to rip your thick thighs away from each other and catch a glimpse of your pussy. He didn't get to see it in the spring. Maybe the water of the onsen made your pussy as beautiful and glowy as the rest of your skin. Maybe it made you tighter, wetter... maybe it was an aphrodisiac and now your body was begging for cock, your glistening and tight hole needing to be filled.
But, Seungmin sat still and your thighs remained clamped shut. He cleared his throat.
"Maybe it was the guys..." he answered honestly. Well, somewhat honestly. Intrigued, you leaned forward and rested your arms across your knees. Oh, great. Now your pussy was secured but your tits were practically falling out of the robe. Seungmin swore that if he nudged you, your nipple would slip out, just for a second. And in that second, the sight of your tender buds would cause him to immediately latch onto them, suckling eagerly in the hopes you would cum just from him playing with you. He tucked his knees tighter against his body to cover his erection further.
"What do you mean by that?" You asked, unaware of the state you were putting him in.
"Just that..." His voice trailed off.
"What?" You asked, hoping he would continue,
He took a deep breath and sighed, "I hoped it would be just us. Like, I love hanging out with everyone but also... it can be overwhelming, you know? Especially on a weekend when I'm supposed to be relaxing. That's why I asked you to come. And now... you're stuck with me in this room and I have to calm myself before I get pissed that everyone decided to come on our vacation."
His eyes didn't meet yours the entire time he spoke. Yet, when he did, he noticed how your eyes were formed into small crescents, pressed together due to the light smile on your face.
"Oh, Seungmin," you soothed, "you couldn't get rid of me even if you tried."
Seungmin's cock twitched, because of course it would. Fuck, you were trying to comfort him, and here he was creaming just from a few harmless words. He was hunched over now in a feeble attempt to cover his cock, but you took it as a sign that he was about to cry. The truth is, he would cry if his hot tip wasn't nestled in your mouth within the next five seconds. Nonetheless, you continued.
"I know it can be a lot, but the guys understand that we're here to relax," you continued, voice smooth. "They want us to be calm and chill for a weekend— and especially you. I could hear them talk through the wall of the onsen and they said that they were really worried you didn't join them. They don't need any more pressure on themselves and neither do you. Please don't feel any burden this weekend, okay?"
His head was resting on his knees now, face down. Didn't you realize what you were doing to him? How your kind words and reassuring glances were making him red down to his chest? You were too nice for your own good.
"Thank you," he whispered. Placing his chin on his knees, he displayed his blushed face and let his eyes gaze up at you again. "It's nice to know that they care so much. That you care that much, too." He hoped you would think of his shyness as a result of his emotional vulnerability, not because he was tucking his dripping dick away and staining the spa's robes.
"Of course I care," you sighed, "you're my Seungie, after all." Fuck, when will you stop talking? Seungmin almost whined at that stupid sentence.
"And, for the record," you giggled. "I don't think I'm 'stuck' with you, in any sense of the word." Okay, that genuinely made him embarrassed. Not only were you sexy and slutty and would take his cock so well, but you were cute, too. Fuck, you were unbearable. He almost wished you resented him just so you would leave and, pray, return back to the spring for a late-night soak.
Instead, he opted to tease you, hoping to lighten the mood he had created in his shame.
"Aw, thanks," he layered his voice in a sickly-sweet tone, mocking your fluffy, comforting words. "But I'd like you to leave now."
"Never," you giggled at his joke. "You're stuck with me!"
"No!" He protested half-heartedly.
"Yes!" You were sitting on your knees now, perched in front of him and giving him an ample view down your robe. Please don't move closer, y/n, he cried in his mind. Not another step, I can't do it. Not today, I can't control myself, please.
"N-No!" He laughed louder.
"Yes!" With that word, you sprung off the bed and tackled him once more.
He landed with a thud against the hard ground. You on top of him, chest to chest.
Literally.
His robe had opened up. Yours partly did, too.
Despite the hardness of the fall, he was dead silent, exacerbating the loudness of your laughter. Then, when you realized why his eyes were so wide and what was poking your bear tummy, you stopped. And the silence became deafening.
He made no sound. Neither did you.
Wow. I'm controlling myself much better than I thought I would, Seungmin thought.
You cleared your throat.
"Seungie?" You asked, arms caging Seungmin and holding your upper body above his own, magnetizing your hips to his.
"...yeah?" he responded after a beat.
"...you're..." You couldn't finish your sentence.
"Yeah, y/n?" He murmured, close to you.
"You're... leaking all over me."
His cock twitched involuntarily, making you shut your eyes tight and a slight moan escape him, too.
"...yeah." He groaned.
Yet, neither of you moved. Ragged breaths were the only sound as you both silently argued about what to do. It was as if you were having a whole conversation through your intense eye contact, an unbreakable gaze that spoke of all the possibilities that could come from the situation. It seemed like hours had passed, but it had only been 30 seconds. Seungmin knew it was 30 seconds: he had counted to remember how long he had his cock pressed into you. As pathetic as it was, this was quite possibly the greatest moment of his life. His eyes held yours and grew sharper when you shifted your weight, involuntarily letting your robe slip open more. You were blushing as much as he was now.
"I... I should fix that," you stated silently. "It's cold in here."
"Yeah," he responded dumbly, "anything you want."
You gave him a nod. Still, you didn't move. It took a deep breath and a shift in your gaze for you to finally lean back on your knees. However, your bodies seemed glued together and it made it impossible for you to pull away from Seungmin. Maybe it was because you were scared for Seungmin to see your chest (as if he hadn't already cum to the sight of your tits dripping wet). Maybe it was because you were embarrassed to see his cock. Maybe it was because you and he both knew that if you pulled away, you couldn't help but stare at the other.
Maybe you wanted to look. Maybe he did too.
Your body shifted away from his slowly, your squishy chest leaving him exposed to the cold and, in turn, his nipples stiff. And, to Seungmin's luck, the same was happening to you.
You stared at him. He stared back. While he stared at your chest, your gaze raked down his abdomen. Or, rather, what was pressed against it eagerly.
If Seungmin had been more observant, maybe he would've noticed how his robe had completely unravelled in the midst of things. He would've noticed that his cock was bucking from the frigid air that attacked him without your tummy squishing it. He would've noticed how juices and precum were pooling on the ridges of his abdomen as they dripped from his slit. If Seungmin had been more observant, maybe he would've noticed you licking your lips at the sight.
"Seungie?" You asked, making no move to close your robe. God, the way you said his name. He adjusted his hips at the sound of your voice, rutting them up into the air and whimpering at how his cock isn't hugged by something tight, warm, and wet.
"Yes, y/n?" He said more confidently than he expected.
"Does it..." you gulped, "hurt?"
Part of Seungmin wanted to lie and say "no, sweetheart. It wants you to fuck it raw, but my dick is still fine." He really wanted to play the role of the cocky, sly guy who would pull a smirk as he snapped his hips into yours. But, it wasn't who he was. At least not right now. Right now, he was the kind of guy that would cry if pussy felt too good, tear up at the site of painting someone's cunt with cum. Plus, he couldn't lie. Not now, at least. Not to you.
He nodded vigorously, "So much, y/n."
"Really?" Your voice was laced with concern, yet your eyes were still fixated on the pulsing cock below you.
"Yes," Seungmin continued, voice calm. "So, so much—ah!"
Your index finger began to trace up his shaft, collecting the inordinate amount of juices that flowed from his tip and rubbing them back onto his cockhead.
"You certainly are hard." You were almost clueless with your words. Almost. While Seungmin was writhing beneath you and hopelessly bucking his hips up, cock twitching from the contact, you were just staring in awe at his length. Perhaps it was the size that amazed you, the precum that leaked from his slit, or his sensitivity to your touch. Either way, your eyes were wide, unblinking, and astounded.
"Y-yeah," Seugmin panted, "But, p-please be careful. You're g-gonna m-make me—fuck!"
Your hand firmly grasped around the base of his heavy erection and held it lovingly, pumping the base slowly. You twisted as you toyed with his length and the side of your hand occasionally rubbed against his balls, making Seungmin's whines resemble stuttering, high-pitched mewls.
"Y-y/n," he cried as you maintained your slow pace, "what are you doing?!"
"I've never sucked cock before," you mumbled, seemingly to yourself. "I've always wanted to try, want to see how deep I can take it, where you like to be licked, what makes your dick twitch..." Your voice started to adopt a light tone near the end. You almost sounded giddy, excited at the idea of sucking dick. In fact, Seungmin—with what little thought he had—thought you sounded downright mischievous.
"I wonder how you taste..."
Your hand moved further up and down his length now and Seungmin's moans were surely too loud for the thin walls of the resort. He prayed no one heard, that it was just you and him that knew you were fondling his slicked member and enjoying it too.
"P-please, stop, I-I'll—"
"Cum?" You finished for him, "I hope you do." Seungmin's lips quivered as his eyes welled. How could you be so cruel, stroking him with such a languid pace? It was inhuman how you treated him.
"Y/n," he growled, "d-don't start something you c-can't finish." His anger was creeping up on him. That anger he tries to hide, and unsuccessfully so. However, its effect was diminished by his blubbering, blushing face and exposed cock that eagerly accepted every pump you gave it.
"Oh, I very much intend to 'finish'," you teased, your voice still walking the line between serious and jovial.
"Well, what are you waiting f-for?"
Weirdly, you didn't respond with the same energy as Seungmin had come to expect. Rather, you retreated to that quiet, contemplative state you were in minutes before when you saw his cock. You pondered his words, what you wanted to say, and how well the weight of him felt in your firm grasp. You took a breath in.
"Can I suck you?" You started to move in before he could answer, Seungmin already feeling your hot breath on his oozing tip. Your actions, dually, made Seungmin's anger disperse, revealing—once again—his whining neediness.
"W-what?" He whimpered.
"Just a taste," you said with a smile, your back arching and displaying your ass while your head ducked down. "Just to try, just to see how you feel... wanna see how those veins feel along my tongue."
"Y/n, baby, just slow down—ah!"
When your hot tongue kitten-licked his cockhead before enveloping it in your warm mouth, Seungmin swore it was like his whole life had led to this moment. You worked his shaft desperately with one hand—the same one that was jerking him before, offering the same twisting, slow, and loving strokes— while the other played with his balls, teasing him. Drool and juices dripped from your mouth as the tasty precum leaked more and more from his slit. He tasted so good, just as you dreamed, and it made your mouth water more and more.
"Y/n, god, d-don't stop," Seungmin moaned through panting whines. Your mouth popped off of his cock for a brief moment, blowing cold air on his tip and making Seungmin cry at the sensation. Then, with a quick kiss to his tingly slit, you slid your mouth back down his length and sucked vigorously.
"H-how did y-you get so good at s-sucking cock?" One of his hands weaved into your hair and tugged it at the roots, guiding you further down his length. Though you choked, he persisted, as did you. Soon, his lower abdomen was grazing your nose and he was shallowly thrusting into your mouth, making you gag with every push of his hips.
"Fuck, fuck, fuck, f-fuck," Seungmin panted. His grip on your hair started to feel like he was petting you, coaxing you through the tears building in your eyes and the pain stitching along your jaw.
"Y/n, I-I'm g-gonna—fuck!" Seungmin stuffed his dick fully in your mouth and shot cum right down your throat, bobbing your head so you could fully milk him of every drop. Considering he had cum just 30 minutes before, the amount of cum that leaked from him was insurmountable. He normally didn't cum that much, but when he pulled his still-hard dick out of your mouth, he was shocked by the amount of semen that layered his cock and dripped from the corners of your mouth.
"Y/n... y/n, are you okay?" He stammered. Seungmin's voice was teetering between control and stiff whimpers as he tried to compose himself. He felt a little awful about how aggressive, how needy and shamefully desperate he was just now. However, you didn't respond.
You stared at him, wide, tear-filled eyes playfully catching his gaze. Then, you stuck your tongue out, showing him the rest of his cum and letting some drip onto your exposed tits. Seungmin groaned at the sight, trying to pitifully lean forward to catch the cum in his mouth. He wanted to hold your jaw open, make you spit the rest of his cum onto your bare torso just so he could lick it off. Instead, he hummed with anguish as you tilted your head back and swallowed each and every drop of his semen.
"Now," you said with a hoarse voice, wiping your slicked mouth with the back of your hand. "Are you feeling better, Seung? How did I do?"
God... tell me... how could she act like this? Seungmin cursed the creator for making you so cute, so fucking perfect at taking cock. Had you learned from all those videos Seungmin saw in your browser history? Had you practiced on those colourful dildos he found hiding under your bed that one time? Either way, you knew what to do, and you were damn good at it.
"Yeah, y/n," he answered, chest still rising and falling heavily as rushing blood continued to keep him stiff, "s-so good."
You grinned, content with yourself and his response.
Then, Seungmin started to smirk.
"However..." that word and his expression made your heart drop. Seungmin chuckled.
"You didn't finish the job." Seungmin's hand reached up and extended his index finger, slowly dragging it up and down his pulsing dick. He took in a shaky breath and the action, but he continued nonetheless. He needed to prove a point. He needed to show you he could control himself, that he wasn't the kind of guy that would tuck his cock into his robe just because he was around a pretty girl. He needed to show you he was still that controlled guy you knew, and that you were still the spontaneous, bratty slut he knew. He needed to show you who was calling the shots.
"How could you leave me like this, y/n?"
"B-but, I—"
"Don't play fucking dumb with me." Your playful demeanour had completely abandoned you. Seungmin's voice was cocky, teasing, and almost mocking the way you were just moments ago.
"I can't believe you didn't live up to my expectations," he tsked. You played with the hem of your robe, blushing profusely and—once again—eyeing his hard-on.
Seungmin sighed, "Get on the bed, y/n."
"W-what?!" You asked, still stunned. Seungmin's hand suddenly stopped stroking his length and his eyes shot to you. His face was stern and he was ... angry? You couldn't place the emotion. All you knew was it made you shiver and painfully aware of how wet you had become.
"Get. On. The. Bed." His tone was patronizing and agonizingly attractive. He eyed you, his expression hinting at the consequences you would face if you were to misbehave. Despite being prone to disobeying him, his patronizing voice seemed to hypnotize you. Somehow, your body seemed to already rise to the bed and settle on the tightly made sheets.
Seungmin moaned, "Good." After all the torment you put him through, his voice was finally so sure, so stable.
As you sat on the bed, staring down at the boy, you bit your lip and fidgeted, nervous under his gaze. While enjoying your torment, Seungmin stood slowly and let his robe fall to the ground, showcasing his somehow still-hard cock as it arched against him.
He nodded to your clothes, "Take your robe off, y/n." He demanded you disrobe as if your tits weren't already on display, as if they weren't smeared in his cum. Still, you obliged, sliding the soft cotton off of you and shivering as it tickled your skin. The robe pooled around you before Seungmin leaned forward and snatched the bunched fabric, throwing it aside and leaving you sitting bare.
"S-Seungmin," you mumbled as your face grew warm. Your hands started to move to cover your body, embarrassed as your tits perked under his stare.
Seungmin chuckled, "Go ahead. Cover yourself." His words shocked you and made your blush grow, embarrassed by the very attempt of preserving your innocence. "You look so cute trying to act all embarrassed, as if you weren't choking on my cock and enjoying it just minutes ago." He started to saunter towards the bed, hand gripping his base and giving it a stiff tug.
"Why don't you cover your cunt, too?" He panted out.
"What?!" His terminology shocked you, the vulgar word sounding like honey as it dripped off of his tongue.
"I said," his voice grew, as did his sarcasm, "cover your fucking pussy up. Don't you want me to not see it? Like you weren't practically begging me to fuck your tits earlier as you licked my cock? You're already soaking our sheets, anyways." He stood over you now, right at the edge of the bed.
"Use your hand. Go on. Cover your tight pretty little pussy with your fingers. Why not put some in there so I don't see anything? Stuff yourself full and make sure to stretch it open so I don't see any of your sweet juices leaking out." He leaned forward over you, letting one hand pet your cheek with the other took your hand and guided it down your naval towards your cunt. "How about you finger your clit, too? You know, just to make sure I know where not to touch." You whimpered at each of his words, softly rutting into the crumpled bedsheets.
"I'm such a good friend, after all. I wouldn't want you to be uncomfortable with me licking your sensitive little clit and finger-fucking your hole. You should do it yourself, then. You know, just to make sure I don't." The last of his words were emphasized with him forcing your own fingers into your cunt.
"S-seungie!" You cried as he guided two of your fingers in and out of your pussy, his own teasing your entrance as he directed your hand.
"Yeah, just like that," he gasped, "use your other hand, too. Touch your clit, do it." He forced your other hand down onto your cunt and you automatically began to play with your clit, moans pouring from you as you pinch your eyes shut. "Keep—fuck—keep going, you are doing so good."
"Like that?" You asked, forcing your eyes open to look into his. His eyes were enamoured with you, like he was seeing the stars in the night sky for the first time.
"So good for me," Seungmin said, barely registering your question. "Y/n, babe, you are so good for me." He clamoured onto the bed now, trying to not seem so desperate as he sat behind you.
"Seungmin?" You whimpered out as you kept your hands at the pace he ordered you to maintain.
"Just keep going," he assured you as he let his legs cage you, pressing his chest into your back and his cock into the curve of your ass. "Just gotta make sure you stay covered, hmm?"
"Seung—min, fuck!" You moaned as his hands dragged tantalizingly slow from the sides of your chest to your nipples, sliding under your arms and holding you close to him. So close you could feel him leak all over your back, whimpering as fluids continued to push out of his sensitive cock.
"D-don't you wanna stay all pure and covered, y/n?" He hummed as he pushed his head into the crook of your neck. Your scent invaded him and fogged his mind, making him abandon his teasing efforts and instead firmly grab your tits.
"Fuck!" You yelped, briefly stopping your movements. Seungmin growled at your cessations and traced his teeth along your neck.
"Keep going," he demanded as his grip softened and he started to paw your breasts. "Don't ever stop. Go faster, even." And, like the obedient slut you were, you obeyed. Your increased pace made your breath hitch and your legs push together. However, you didn't dare stop. Not when you were this close, not when Seungmin was begging you to continue.
"Seung— Seung," you stammered, "I-I'm getting close, d-don't stop, mmh!" Seungmin licked the conch of your ear then moved to bite and tongue the lobe.
While you worked your cunt, his hands expertly twisted, pulled and flicked your nipples. He kept imagining your tits as they were coated in water, but then realized you were real, that this dream was happening and he could simply see your tits up close, how he's always wanted.
You started to bounce on your fingers, eagerly sucking them into your cunt as you whined in his arms. The act made your tits jiggle in Seungmin's palm. He groaned at the sensation, hissing at how your chest felt as good as he dreamed of.
"Cumming, cumming, I cum, Seungie," You whimpered, your voice harmonizing with the wet sounds that came from you eagerly rubbing your clit and stuffing your pussy.
"Cum, y/n," he whispered into your ear in a joyous tone. "Make the bed all sticky and wet... covered in your cum. Ruin these sheets. They're not ours, anyways. Cum all over them."
Your moans grew higher and higher pitched before you became silent as your orgasm took over you. Your fingers twitched as they tried to push you through, and with Seungmin still pulling at your nipples, you had lost all control.
"Fuck, fuck..." you panted as you felt your hands become sticky with cum. Seungmin chuckled, rubbing his fingertips along your sides and causing your skin to develop goosebumps. You collapsed into him as your legs quivered. Seungmin, in turn, saw his opportunity and took it, offering you soft kisses to your neck while one hand trailed lower and lower. Suddenly, he started tracing your clit hard and fast, causing you to convulse.
"Seungmin—Seung d-don't," you mewled as you tried to push his hand away, unsuccessfully so. He laughed as you tried again, this time managing to shoo his hand away from your pulsing clit. Instead of continuing to pester you, Seungmin allowed his now-soaked fingers to rest on your thigh, squeezing the fat and keeping you open while his other hand massaged your chest.
"So, so good for me," he mumbled happily as your breathing settled. As you regained sentience, you slowly became aware of Seungmi's position. More specifically, how his painfully hard cock had leaked all over your backside. You gasped, making Seungmin release another laugh.
"I see you've realized," he hisses as he wraps his arms around you, pulling you closer. "I still have plenty of more plans for your wet little cunt, Y/n."
Then, with his tightened grip, Seungmin effortlessly forced you onto the bed, pressing your back against the ruined and moist sheets.
"Seungmin!" you yelped. The boy clamoured over you, forcing your legs wide apart and then settling them around his waist. He sat on his knees, pumping his erection as he stared at your tits and your drenched hole that clenched around nothing. The pinches and flicks had turned your nipples raw and sensitive, so swollen from Seungmin's hopeless touches. God, Seungmin was a lucky, lucky man today.
"Look at you... I'm so glad you played with your pussy for me. You're all stretched out now and ready to take my cock, hmm?" Your fucked-out eyes could barely meet his, more interested in the languid strokes he is offering to his used cock. You wondered if he had jacked off today, if that was why he was so red and swollen. Either way, Seungmin was a sight to behold.
"I wanna ask you something," he questions as he maintains a steady pace. You nod vigorously, your hands rubbing up and down his arms and trying to bring him closer to you. You just wanted a kiss from him, to feel him close, to taste his spit and sweat like an animal who just needed to fuck. To hell with his questions. However, he persisted.
"How did you get so good at sucking cock, y/n?"
Your actions suddenly stopped as you stared up at him. However, he didn't say anything. His hand rubs your thigh, coaxing an answer out of you.
"P-practiced," you whimpered out. Seungmin chuckled. He seemed to like that answer.
"Yeah? You practiced?" He teased, "What did you do to practice, honey?" His hot tip met your folds and dragged your cum along your pussy. Your hole clenched around nothing, spasming from the overstimulation. It was like torture and you couldn't hold back your moans.
"Aw, c'mon, y/n!" Seungmin groaned, "I've been waiting to stuff my cock into you, and I will once you answer my question. How? Did? You? Practice? Sucking? Cock?" Each word was emphasized by his cockhead slapping against your clit, filling the room with lewd, wet sounds.
"I—fuck— I" you stuttered out, barely able to control yourself. "I-I-I did it on my dildos—b-but I was always good! Always... I... I a-always th-ought of Seungie... only wanna suck my Minnie's cock..."
"Really?" Seungmin continued to tease you. Yet, his voice had something else in it. Though he was mocking you and wanted to ridicule your dishevelled state, he was also hopeful. Hopeful that you were telling the truth, that you wanted this as much as him. He practically prayed every night for you in the most unholy and unorthodox of fashions.: fast strokes on his spent cock, used fleshlights, sticky hands... were you praying in the same way? And for the same thing?
"Fuck, Seungmin!" You cried out of suffering, "Could you not tell by the way I practically milked m-my tits for you in the s-spring?"
Seungmin suddenly stopped his actions, the head of his dick still soaked in your juices and pressing into your clit, making you squirm.
"Is that true?" You gave him a small nod, almost as if you were unaware of the words that just slipped out of your mouth. "How did you know?"
You rolled your eyes as if he wasn't towering over you. "B-because I s-saw our window looked out to the s-spring... and the whole time I w-was t-trying to g-get your attention..." You blushed and looked away, "You're already staring at my chest all the time..."
Seungmin was in awe of you. Truly. You... you had exceeded every desire he ever had. How could he resist you? Your cunningness? The sweet, drenched pussy between your thighs? He rested on one of his elbows and moved his hand to cup your cheek.
"You put on that little show for me? Just to get me hard?" He asked as he resumed dragging his fat cock through your folds. You nodded meekly, suddenly so embarrassed and insecure from the sweet gesture. Seugnmin smiled.
"Such a good fucking girl."
He slid his cock into your sopping pussy, juices leaking as his cockhead submerged itself in your cum.
"Seungmin!" You whined as his girth stretched your worn pussy. He immediately set a fast pace, trying to chase a high that will exhaust him and that will finally relieve the strain of his flushed length.
"S-so, fuck, so so g-ood." Seungmin tried to say more, he really did. Yet, he couldn't. Not when the squelching sounds of him stuffing your drenched cunt was like music to his ears, not when you were moaning so loud that the boys in the other room would hear, and not when he had been waiting forever to do this.
"S-stuff me," you whimpered, locking your legs around his waist and wrapping your arms around his neck so he could push deeper. "Fill me up, Seungie, fill me up—fuck!"
"Y/n, God," Seungmin panted in a high-pitched voice. "So—wet—for—me—gonna—cum." Each word was matched with an aggressive thrust of his dick into you, making you moan as he prodded that gummy part inside of you. He looked down at you and met your eyes, immediately captured by their glow of love and adoration. The slight eye contact did something to him, as if it returned all romance to his carnal instinct. He leaned down and pressed his lips softly into yours, whimpering and whining into your mouth while he buried himself in you.
"Touch my c-clit," you begged between kisses. Seungmin obliged, moving his hand between your sticky bodies and vigorously rubbing your maltreated bundle of nerves.
"F-fuck, shouldn't have done tha-t," he whimpers, "you f-feel too good, now. C-clenching a-round me." Nevertheless, he continued to finger your clit and picked up the pace of his thrust. The way your sensitive tits pressed against him made his head spin, the fat of your chest making him imagine how good his cock would look buried between them. He ducked his head down briefly and began to suck and nip at your sensitive breasts, slobbering over them like a dog. You hissed at the sensation, pulling at his hair in an act of encouragement.
"Hmph!" You moaned, "Seungie, I think I—"
"Me, too, baby, me too." Seungmin was almost embarrassed by how fast he was gonna cum. Almost. If it wasn't for you whining beneath him and begging for his cock, then maybe he would feel differently. Instead, he urged his body to chase his high and help you reach yours. He whined as he continually pistoned his cockhead into you, pulling himself up to bury his face in the crook of your neck.
"I'm—I'm—I—" he stammered as the buzzing in his body grew to be dizzying.
"Please cum inside, please cum inside," you repeated like a mantra as you pulled him tightly to you.
"Fuck!" Seungmin cried as he offers one last harsh push into you. As his cock starts to spurt cum, the feeling of fullness caused your body to seize and your back to arch. Your cunt squirted around Seungmin's cock, coating it in cum while his orgasm shook his body.
"Y/n, y/n, my good girl, my y/n," he mumbled sleepily as he continued to offer small ruts into you. With a few more snaps of his hips, Seungmin sat up and enjoyed the white ring you left around his—thankfully—softening length. The sounds of him re-stuffing you with his finished length made you mewl and Seungmin hiss. He slowly stopped his motions and pulled away, enjoying how the cum mixture poured out of you. He smiled to himself, content with the sight and the fact that his cock was finally (finally) no longer hard, that his balls were empty, and that you were satisfied.
"Do you feel good, y/n?" He asked as he caressed your legs. However, you were too fucked-out to respond. In an effort to elicit a response, Seungmin pinched the flesh and earned an annoyed, pained groan from you.
"There you are," he laughed.
"S-stop," you mumbled as he leaned down and pressed loving kisses to the side of your face.
"Oh, before you were showing off your tits publicly just to get my attention, but now you can't even accept my kisses." Your eyes went wide as you remember your confession, slapping him lightly repeatedly out of humiliation.
"Ah! Hey, c'mon, you liked it," he teased as he stepped away. He was gone momentarily before he returned with a damp, warm cloth and began to press it over your vulva, cleaning your leaking pussy. "You liked it, just like how you like me."
You blushed and looked away, unable to make eye contact. Almost as if his caring act and physical contact made you embarrassed, but in a loving way.
Huh. Maybe you two were more alike than he realized.
"You like me too," you responded meekly, emphasizing the word in the same fashion as Seungmin.
He was quiet. Seungmin continued his ministrations, though. He pressed the warm cloth softly on you, staring at the stains on the bed, the redness of your thighs, and then up at your face. Your expression was hard to place, but there was something in it that he automatically recognized. It was always in your eyes, but especially now. It was even feverish in its presence. It made him feel that certain way that he often felt so ashamed of. Now, he realized that feeling was what caused him to fall for you. It was so present now, so easily noticeable. He sighed, taking your hand softly, making your eyes go wide. He was not normally this affectionate, this attentive. He was not this openly loving. It made your heart skip a beat as if he wasn't just buried in you. You looked up at him and saw something in his eyes that reflected that very expression in your own.
"Yeah, I do like you," he responded. "I really do."
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thugpugs4lrh · 6 months
Note
i LOVED how you wrote my last request abt no shame!! i really love the like song imagine type of thing, and i was wondering if you could do another smut with dom!luke and fem!reader, and this time, with the song of your choice! thank you!! i love your writing :) <3
Babydoll
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꒰ ⊹ ˚ Summary — A brief makeout session at a frat party turns into Luke taking your breath, and other things, away (Kinktober Day 7). Inspired by BABYDOLL by Ari Abdul.
Pairing — Dom!Luke x sub and virgin!reader
Word Count — 2.2k
Content Warnings — Smut, virgin/innocent reader, alcohol use, unprotected p in v (don't do this y'all), Luke being rough, orgasm denial, Luke has a virginity kink, cursing, overall just filthy smut ;)
Note — Both reader and Luke will have consumed alcohol prior to hooking up in this work. This is a work of fiction, please do not do this in real life and stay safe out there<3 Thank you, anon, for the request!
DNI under 18 please :)
“Oh, he’s so looking at you.” Your best friend mumbled, taking a sip from her cup. 
“He is not,” You sighed. “He definitely has a girlfriend.” 
“He doesn’t,” she confirmed, scrolling through her phone. “I just checked his insta.”
You laughed and shook your head, watching as she wandered off to pour herself another drink. Y/B/F/N was always much more social than you were, which is how you ended up at this party in the first place. You looked down at your red solo cup, swishing around whatever cheap, light beer she had given you. You weren’t normally one to get drunk, or even tipsy, but you were feeling a bit braver tonight. You had curled your hair and applied a thin coat of cherry-red lip gloss.
“Hey.” 
You looked up when a voice that did not belong to your friend spoke to you. And when you said you had to look up, you really meant it. You weren’t short by any means, but he was huge. Both in stature and in muscle. 
“Oh, uh, hi Luke.” You smiled shyly. 
The blond smirked, eyeing you up and down. “I don’t see you at these parties much.”
“Yeah, uh, drug. Wait no, not drugs,” You said quickly, blushing and raking a hand through your hair. “I came with my friend.” You said solidly once you had collected yourself. 
Luke let out a low chuckle, sneaking himself ever closer to you. “You’re so innocent.” he said, brushing his hand under your chin. 
You absolutely reddened, both from his touch and from his words. “You don’t even know me.” 
“I could,” he shrugged nonchalantly. “In more ways than one.” Luke’s blue eyes gleamed mischievously. 
You couldn’t tell if it was the alcohol or the effect Luke himself had on you, but you felt a spark growing inside you, pulling you closer to him. “Really?”
“Really,” Luke nodded. “Follow me?” he asked. 
The way he said it was more like a command than an ask, but somehow, you couldn’t stop yourself from agreeing. You wondered how Luke didn’t have a girlfriend. He was hot and he was authoritative in a way that made your insides feel syrupy-sweet. You shot your best friend a quick text before shoving your phone into the back pocket of your jeans. Luke checked over his shoulder once to make sure you were still following him, walking up the stairs of the house. 
“Where are we going?” You asked him quietly. 
Deep inside of you, you knew what Luke wanted and where he was headed, but for some weird reason, it didn’t seem so bad. You wouldn’t say you were stuck up or a prude, but you definitely hadn’t shared anything more than a quick peck with guys. Luke though, he was different. He made you want to go farther with him. 
Luke opened the door to one of the rooms, leading you inside. “This is mine. It’s nice to just get away from the partying, y’know?” he said, sitting down on the bed. 
You tentatively sat down beside him smiling softly. “Yeah, I know. Parties aren’t usually my thing.” You said quietly, tucking a piece of hair behind your ear.
The blond smirked, moving to rest his hand on your thigh. “Oh yeah?”
“Yeah…” You answered. “Sorry if I’m like, being awkward.” You said, hating how weird your voice sounded at the moment. 
You were definitely more introverted, but you wouldn’t call yourself shy. Luke just did things to you that were unlike the effect of anyone you had ever met before. You longed to run your fingers through his golden-blond hair and see how gloriously angelic he looked without a shirt on. 
Luke must have read your mind, because he slowly pulled you into his lap, gnawing on his scruffy lip and black lip ring. “You are so fucking hot, Y/N.”
You blushed as Luke wrapped the back of his hand around the nape of your neck, your legs straddling him. You could feel his growing boner under you, but you were less than experienced, and you weren’t sure what exactly you were supposed to do about it. Luke stared into your eyes for a moment, before beginning to kiss you roughly and passionately. 
“Oh…” You breathed into the kiss. 
You had never experienced a makeout like this; rough, passionate, and definitely heading towards something more. Luke felt his hands around your ass and lower back, sneaking slowly into your shirt and undoing your bra clasp. For the first time in your life, you moaned because of someone else’s doing. The feeling of Luke's dick brushing against your slowly-dampening panties felt unlike anything you had experienced before. His tongue fought yours for dominance, moving in sync with him moving you in slow circles around his lap, almost like you were giving him a lapdance. 
Luke undid your bra, before pulling off both it and your shirt. You practically begged him for more with your body, pushing yourself closer to him if that were even possible. The blond smirked as he took in your titties, smiling to himself. 
“God, so fuckin’ pretty.” he moaned almost more to himself than to you. 
He pulled off his own navy blue shirt and you blushed at the sight. Luke’s abs were so beyond toned, and even in the dim light of his bedroom, you could see his happy trail peeking out of the waistband of his black skinny jeans. 
“Like what you see?” he asked, a knowing look in his eyes. 
“Yes…yes, Luke.” You smiled breathlessly. 
“That’s what I like to hear, babe.” 
You blushed at the whole dirty talk and overall erotic situation. You had gotten yourself off with vibrators and pictures of your celebrity crushes before, but never had you been so turned on by a guy that was right in front of you. 
Luke pinned your arms to the bed, continuing to make out with you as the tent in his pants grew. Before long, your neck was covered in hickeys and Luke was reaching for the waistband of your jeans. 
“Is this okay?” he asked.
A shirt was one thing, but pants was another. Maybe it was the alcohol, or maybe it was how ungodly sexy Luke was, but you found yourself saying yes with a growing smile on your face. The blond didn’t need to be told twice, for he immediately undid the button on your jeans and slid them off, smiling when he saw your lacy, pink panties. 
“Got all ready for me, babydoll?” he chuckled darkly. 
You nodded, your blush and soft smile ever-growing. “Maybe.”
Luke used his thumbs to slide your panties off, a gleam growing in his eyes at what was laid out in front of him when your underwear were removed. He slowly crouched, nuzzling your inner thighs with his nose and soft pecks of his plump, pink lips. Instinctively, you clenched your thighs around his head, sucking in a gasp at the feeling of his stubble and cool metal lip ring on your sensitive skin. 
“Clenching already?” he asked with a chuckle. “I haven’t even started eating you out.”
You blushed and tried to relax your legs, but you already felt so close to your climax and Luke had barely done anything. “Sorry…”
Luke didn’t seem to accept your apology for being so innocent. He just threw his head down and began to run his tongue along your already-dripping folds. “So wet for me.” he moaned. 
You whimpered rather loudly for Luke barely doing anything, but it just felt so good. You began to slowly tangle your hands in his hair, pulling softly at it when he ran his tongue over your clit. 
“Luke.” You cried. 
“Oh baby, you’re so sensitive,” he laughed. “What if I did this?”
The blond began to eat you out with such a forceful rhythm that matched the way his body was nearly pounding into the bed. You couldn’t help but to cry out at the wonderful sensation, clenching your thighs around Luke. He too was moaning as he feasted on you, his tongue running over every delicate nerve with a beat that was so much more pleasurable than any sex toy you had ever tried. 
“Oh god, I need to cum.” You whimpered. 
Luke immediately pulled back, cocking his head at you and searching your features with those oh-so-blue eyes. “You really thought I was gonna let you cum on the sheets and not on my dick?” he laughed. 
You blushed, shrinking beneath his gaze, but you’d be lying if you said it wasn’t hot. Your insides felt practically ready to explode with the need to cum and Luke staring at you and demanding answers from you in such an authoritative way wasn’t helping. 
“Good thing I’m ready to ride you until your mascara is streaking down that sexy little dollface of yours.” he hummed, undoing his belt.
You moaned loudly, arching your back. Your pussy was still throbbing at the way Luke’s tongue had run over your folds and you were practically dying to have him touch you again. You could see through your squinted-shut eyes that Luke was also moaning himself, palming his hard-on. He had taken off both his black jeans and his underwear and you could see that his dick was huge. As much as you were getting off on how hot Luke was and how much attention he was giving you, you couldn’t help but to feel nervous at the thought of fitting all of him inside of you. You had heard from your more experienced friends that the first time usually hurt, and you’d hate to have to take a break from Luke’s euphoria. 
“This may hurt, but I know you can take it.” he hummed, lining himself up with your entrance. 
You nodded quickly, looking up at Luke with large doe eyes. There wasn’t a single bone in your body telling you to stop. You wanted him more than you had ever wanted anyone else. Before you could think any more, Luke slammed into you and you gasped out at the feeling of suddenly being so full. The blond had been right, it definitely hurt, but you tried not to let it show on your face as Luke began to ride you. 
“God, you’re so fuckin’ tight for me,” he moaned sensually. “What are you, a fucking virgin?”
“Uhm, yeah…” You said with a soft giggle, a cherry-red blush spreading across your face. 
“Are you serious?” Luke asked, looking down at you. 
He had his arms planked around your shoulders, hips grinding against yours as he rode into you with such a deep, rough rhythm. The way his golden-blond hair was slicked back with sweat as he stared down at you with a cocky look made you immediately answer his question honestly. 
“Yeah, I’m a virgin…” You whispered. 
“And you didn’t think to tell me that, babydoll?” Luke chuckled. “I wanna make sure your first time is memorable. And by memorable, I mean that pretty little ass won’t be able to sit down tomorrow.” he smirked, whispering huskily in your ear. 
“Oh god, Luke,” You whined, angling your hips to try to accommodate his cock in just the right way so you’d be able to cum. “Please.” 
“Oh, so we’re begging already? You’re a fast learner, babe.”
Luke’s dirty talk was just making your stomach knot even more as your walls began to clench. He looked absolutely godlike, staring down at you while he rode you within an inch of your life. You began to run your nails along his back, just needing something to grab onto to distract from the way your legs were shaking. 
“Oh my god,” You whimpered. “Luke, please. I need to cum. Please.”
He shoved his hips ever closer to yours, his dick hitting your G-spot just right as he bucked his hips. “So fucking pretty. Lettin’ me take your virginity.” he smirked. 
If anything, telling Luke you were a virgin had just made him fuck you harder, and you absolutely loved it. You couldn’t see, hear, or even think about anything other than him. The noise of the party in the frat house downstairs had long died down in your mind, and all you could think about was how good and dirty Luke was making you feel. 
“Go ahead, pretty girl,” Luke told you. “Cum all over my dick.” he practically moaned. 
You didn’t need to be told twice. You immediately let go, clenching tight around Luke’s shaft. You’d be lying if you said that wasn’t the best orgasm you had ever had, pleasuring you so much more than any toy ever could.
Luke bit his lip ring, moaning and grunting as he tried not to cum on the spot from the sound of the erotic noises slipping from your lips. He quickly pulled out of you, pumping his dick that was covered in your sex a few times before cumming all over your stomach and chest. 
“Pull out game strong.” he smirked, kissing you roughly before leaving a hickey on his jawline. 
“That was literally the best way to have my virginity go.” You told him, tangling your fingers in his blond hair. 
“What can I say?” he asked. “Virginity is fuckin’ hot, especially on you.”
You blushed at his words, covering your chest with the sheet. “I had a good time.” 
“Me too, babe,” Luke smirked. “So, do this again sometime?” 
You turned so that you could lay on top of his chest as he laid down, your tits pressed against his bare chest. “Definitely.”
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decolonize-the-left · 5 months
Text
Thinking about Project2025 and how it's at every level and branch of government. How entire cities are now under their thumb.
How Biden is saying "Israel has a right to defend itself" while calling Cop City protesters terrorists for not wanting a more deadly police force to be trained. But didn't stand with rail workers when they demanded better treatment when it was freezing and trains were being derailed.
How an epidemic on par with HIV ravaged the globe and Biden allowed pharma companies to exploit the world with price tags after promising it'd be public access.
Thinking about how in all this Israel and the USA are said to test tactics and weapons on Palestine.
How the USA stands with Zionists and how many people have told me, a native American, that Palestinians are in the wrong.
How the last 75 years don't matter. Only the last 2 weeks.
And real fucking talk?
For all the "progress" liberals pretend we made how are we here?
Americans and several of the Allied countries would not hesitate to conduct Manifest Destiny 2.0 and have blatantly stated as much.
Americans are saying things that my great grandmother heard about reservations and then later about native liberation. They're saying things the pilgrims told us before that. We're animals. Savages. That we are to blame. That when we die out it'll be because we didn't fight hard enough. That we don't deserve to even be here.
And you know what, I would hope this post would reach some of them but I genuinely feel as if liberals are as far gone as MAGAs are.
They will read this and just go and on and on about how bad the other guy is.
How justified they are to keep voting blue. Just like MAGA's whine until their privileged lives being "ruined" by "woke lies" justified them voting for Trump. Just like Israel is justified. Like every fucking war criminal ever has been.
BUT
I implore you to STOP trying to fucking justify everything! Nobody fucking cares about the reasons you use to support a genocidal war monger who's legacy before this was signing one of the most racially marginalizing bills in US history.
How about you try justifying taking a fucking risk, instead?
People in Palestine are being bombed every fucking day and you want to twiddle your thumbs about NOT voting for the guy who said it was okay and for what? Because your life might not be as comfortable as it is right now? That's your concern from your home with a roof?
Call me a fucking conspiracist but I haven't been wrong yet: Biden is a fucking Project2025 plant. And him and Hillary both have done nothing but make the democrats more and more conservative by catering to the "centrist" votes for decades.
Now we're here. They've compromised so much and want to look so "fair" that a genocide is being paid for on American tax dollars and what are liberals tellings us, what are they saying? ITS JUSTIFIED???? AND TO VOTE FOR BIDEN AGAIN
Y'all are so worried about everyone voting blue to avoid republican fascists that you don't even CARE how bad the people youre voting in are. You haven't even noticed the fascists you put in office yourselves.
You forgot your boundaries.
And isn't it funny how rad/fems and TERFs got mainstream around the same time? You know, the white supremacists based ideology that seeped into the mainstream because nobody was critically consuming or gatekeeping what was "empowering to women" for fear of being 'cancelled'?
Why? Cuz if you hate them you hate women. Just like if you criticize america then you're an anti-american Russian/spy/plant. Like if you support Palestine then you hate Jewish people. If support BLM then you obviously hate white people.
And that's it, isn't it. That's what it all boils down to.
White supremacists are and have been manipulating & gaslighting us en masse.
You know your friends that learned to gaslight an audience with therapy speak? The one that makes you afraid to call them out cuz they're better with words than you and could just as easily turn everyone against you if they use enough buzzwords?
That's the tactics white supremacists are using.
"I must be quiet so I don't say something wrong and look like a bigot" "if I speak, I may say the wrong things" "I may say the right thing the wrong way"
They have made you AFRAID to speak against genocide!!! Wake the fuck up!!!!
They aren't event trying to hide it! The IDF made a post that straight up says "you are an anti-Semite if you speak against Israel"
WHICH IS JUST STRAIGHT UP UNTRUE!! So may Jewish people have come forward against Israel and against Zionism and to support Palestine!
Israel's government is Zionist and that is not an inherently Jewish trait! Making you you believe otherwise is part of the propaganda and manipulation so you Stop speaking up. You can support Jewish people and Palestinians both.
Israel and the USA want you to believe that it is one or the other and that's not true.
The only people who benefit from trying to make you choose between which humans get to live are the white supremacists who cheer when this rhetoric starts to normalize conversation about which people are more worthy of living than another.
You have been gaslit into supporting genocide.
Gaslit into going down a white supremacist pipeline.
Gaslit into giving your silent consent.
Snap out of it.
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weebsinstash · 9 months
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Wouldn't it be funny if reader is aware abt the spiderverse being yandere and stuff but still continues to act blissfully unaware and when they found abt the youtwo situation and stuff they used that to their advantage to basically escape the obsessive grasps the yandere spiderverse has. and basically readers all giddy abt it
YouTwo: wow, it sure would be a shame if I started stealing all of this excessive attention you seem to get. I wonder if all your little spider society friends would even be able to tell :)
You: oh my sweet summer child. Oh my little tiny baby still on its mother's milk. Oh my naive ignorant little newborn
You: y'all can fucking HAVE THEM, my guy
You: once I thought I was being nice by offering Miguel some of the extra snacks I was eating while I was delivering a message in-person from another Spiderman and I got close enough that I accidentally saw the holograms he was looking at and this man had been watching another dimension where we were having our wedding
You: Pavitr who has never done anything wrong in his life ever once invited me to a family member's wedding and I was stupid enough to say yes because then I had him and his girlfriend babbling in my ear while I got literal actual personally customized henna, do you have any idea how time consuming and intricate and personal henna is, I felt like I was naked. Beautiful wedding, literally did not have privacy almost that entire day
You: the other week Peter B somehow got the access code from Miguel to have the security clearance to broadcast across the Spider Society and I was in the middle of the cafeteria when literally everyone in the room had their watches light up with his face, "hey I can't find them myself so if anyone sees my other kid let them know how cool they are and how much I love them and how Uncle Pete misses em 🥰" and to this day I can't enter the food court without a literal army of Peter Parkers obnoxiously teasing me, "We LoOOoOooOooVE YoU SwEEtiE"
You: Jess got overwhelmed with the pregnancy hormones once and she asked me how my day was going and I made the mistake of being honest and said I was a little sad and she burst into tears begging me to move into the spare bedroom of her house and asking when I ate last and insisted I join her and her husband for "a family dinner"
You: that Morales kid was feeling kind of depressed so I gave him my perspective on adulthood and how sometimes the only expectations you need to meet are your own dreams for yourself and i told him all these good qualities i saw in him to cheer him up, and now he and Gwen Stacy keep showing up unannounced in my universe to hang out. Do you know how hard it is to avoid someone who can turn invisible. My knees crack when I stand up from sitting down for too long, I can't outrun two parkouring teenagers!
You: the other day i had an earbud fall into the back of my hoodie so I just took it off and shook it out trying to find it and like three different goobers fell out and I pick one of them up and it literally looks like a piece of plastic and I must've accidentally hit something because it said "beep boop boop" in an IRL person's voice and I'm like "hello???" And someone replies "YEAH, LEGO SPIDERMAN HERE"
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Hobie: Canonically hates an entire group (cops), says he hates them, has personally killed one, and is openly proud of it and maybe even willing to do it again
People for some reason: Hobie loves everybody. Everyone one. There's no way he can harbor ill will towards someone. He looks past all the superficial stuff. He could never experience negative feelings about the experience of being oppressed - or openly talk negatively about a group of people actively complicit in his oppression. That's impossible, what are you talking about?? Why do you think he's mean? Also he's from a universe where racism and segregation never existed :)
I'm not saying Hobie would hate white people like he hates cops. I'm not saying he wouldn't date a white person - what I'm saying is:
MY SIBLING IN CHRIST, Hobie is a Murderer.
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Hobie wears blue laces. He has murdered a cop. Because they were a cop. And he's proud of it.
Hobie is not a pacifist. Hobie doesn't 'just love', because he doesn't love cops.
You think he can hate an entire group of people (cops), and put effort into combatting then -
but you don't think he can hold and entire group in high esteem (black people) and put effort into uplifting them or seeking them out?
And even moreso -
If you like his laces, or find them okay - you are condoning murder. And that's coming from someone who likes them.
You like someone who killed a person based on their profession.
He wasn't looking past that!! And he doesn't want to! You're a cop - enough said bruh
You're fine with him murdering one of his oppressors based on their job, but not him personally choosing to not date his oppressors?
You're implying that actual murder is more acceptable than a black person not dating white people.
It's okay if Hobie does one - but not the other?
You are fine with him killing someone - so long as he experiences attraction towards white people??????
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You think him perpetrating violence towards an entire group of people is okay, but not him choosing to not engage with white people romantically?
You're okay when he talks about hating the PM and the pigs and ACAB - but you think the idea of him expressing frustration towards his white oppressors impossible and also wrong of him?
Y'all are okay with writing fics of him being mean to Office Davis because he's a cop and that's okay and funny - but you think him being guarded around white people or romantically unavailable to them based on prior experiences is impossible and bad????
Murder is better than a black person not including you??? Huh???
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'killing a man in cold blood and wearing it proudly I can look past, but not asking a white woman out? That's dispicable.'
mfer I'm GOBSMACKED cause at this point what logic are you running on??? What sense are you making???
I think Hobie would date any race (even though I think he'd be very observant and aware before taking on a partner who does not understand racism personally. not against it, but as a trans person - I have to be very keen on if a potential partner has hidden transphobia for my own safety and life, I think the same extends to Hobie and race.)
But the fact that these people are okay with him committing murder but not okay with him not being romantically available to white people goes to show they don't actually care about his characterization.
They don't actually think he loves everybody. They know what the blue laces mean.
They just care about consuming him. And they will twist his narrative any way they want in order to do so.
Even if that's implying that murder is better than racial solidarity.
I'm not saying Hobie would hate white people like he does cops.
What I'm saying is that Hobie
1) experiences direct racism as a dark skinned, natural haired black guy
2) he would be just as vocal about his anti-racism views as he is his anti-police stance.
The same way he holds cops accountable for the oppression they are complacent in and the divide that causes, he would do the same for the white people around him.
If Hobie talking about hating the cops and the Prime Minister in everyday conversation is okay to you, but him venting about disparity between races that has effected his whole life - makes you uncomfortable, question why.
They're both displaying negative views towards an entire group of oppressors, why is one okay to you?
Why is Hobie killing a cop completely plausible and acceptable to you, but him even talking or thinking about white people in a sightly negatively negative, frustrated light because of the trauma he faced - we all face - completely impossible and unacceptable to you?
Because you think cops deserve it and white people don't? Because you think police brutality is a conversation that matters but racism isn't???
As if the two things aren't linked??????
Because Hobie is just a puppet to you, and the idea he is not the Token Perfect Black Guy makes you uncomfortable???
Surprise!!! Hobie is an Angry Black Man. He's the scary black man who kills people!! Rarr be scared Boo!!!
Over in y'all corner like 'my boy wouldn't hurt a fly' meanwhile he in the back taking the lives of many and hospitalizing dozens more
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Get comfortable with the fact that Hobie is not some hippie lover boy. If you a cop he don't fuck with you, if you black he's gonna uplift you until his last breath.
If you're willing to shout ACAB, you better be shouting BLM too.
That's it. Imma shut the fuck up about it now. I just had to get that one off my mind
Here Hobie
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I can't I can't take him ugghh I wanna see him get belligerent so bad
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xpao-bearx · 1 year
Text
"Like A Virgin"
Steven Grant x Fem!Reader/Jake Lockley x Fem!Reader/Marc Spector x Fem!Reader
Read Part 1 HERE
Read Part 2 HERE
Read Part 3 HERE
NOTES: I literally put my whole heart and pussy into the previous part and it's just so THRILLING to see all the immense love and support!! 🥺❤️❤️❤️
I'm reeeally hoping y'all will like this part, too! Steven has an extremely special place in my heart, but this time we're shifting focus and giving our lovably murderous Moon Boy JAKE his time to shine!! \(^o^)/
Now as we all know, Jake unfortunately hasn't had a lot of screen time yet. I also watched Moon Knight for the third time and besides his confirmed appearance in the post-credits, there are some other more subtle scenes that I'm PRETTY sure Jake was in and it was a lot of fun for me to think so and obsess over!
But I digress! Anywhore, as I was saying, since Jake hasn't been on a lot the way I write him is PURELY made up. Of course, I try my best to capture the vibes I personally get from him, but until Season 2 drops (because I am NOT giving up on that) we don't know for certain what his personality's actually like (and I haven't read the comics please don't shoot me). It was a little challenging, but I really enjoyed getting to explore Jake and his perspective quite a bit! Though he ended up being a bit sadder than I intended CUZ THIS BOI JUST NEEDS AND DESERVES A WHOLE LOTTA LOVIN'❣️
Furthermore, I am not a Spanish speaker. Jake obviously is and I wanna stay as true as possible to the character by having him speak some (*cough* S E X Y *cough*) Spanish throughout, but if I made any mistakes at all then please kindly correct me as I mainly just use Google Translate and/or search up Spanish terms! For example, I was made aware that "ese" means "that" in Spanish. However, it's also Spanish slang for "dude", "man", etc. and I just find it fitting for Jake to call the boys that 😅
Also, Jake is...rough 😳 Don't worry, he loves and cares about you a LOT, but this is a fair WARNING in case you're not into that! And this part got pretty long, IDK I probs blacked out somewhere in the middle and this is le horny result~
Additionally, do y'all think the relationship between reader x Steven/the boys is going too fast? I really try to make it as natural as possible, but hey this is only fiction after all and I think Steven, for one, falls in love FAST since in the show he was already simping for Layla the first time they met 😂 But I can't judge Steven cuz I'd be the same if I ever met Oscar Isaac I mean, I'm already simping now but YOU GET IT
And a lil funny coincidoink, Like A Virgin came on the radio which I guess was your guys' universal push for me to continue this ASAP!
I truly am sorry for the wait!! Life is hard but I simp harder xD
TAGS: @autismsupermusicalassassin @ungracefularchimedes @pimosworld @ababynova @sweatyroadcowboyjudge @anapnovo-blog @am-3-thyst @harrys-tittie @zukoisbabee @wiltedwonderland @the-ginger-draws @bitchyglitterfox @readingfan @spidey-3 @minigirl87 @wandasupremacy @simba-will-live-on @wavychelle @thepowerthismanhasoverme @blackholegladiator @kittytiddywinks @literalfkinsimp @valen-yamyam16 @shaunalouie @howellatme @aleat0ri0 @bean-is-reading @indigxjunipxr
Part 4: Gonna give you all my love, boy
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Your chest rose and fell with each soft, blissful snore. Your face void of any burden, open and peaceful; plump lips parted slightly, looking so kissable. And that's exactly what Steven did, lonely lips descending to meet yours--his slumbering goddess.
An insatiable part of him longed for you to awaken, to spend more time fumbling around in the sheets until sunrise. But he knew, more than anyone else, that sleep was important. And he had no doubt that after all the...unique events that progressed your relationship, you deserved all the rest you can get.
Like the proper gentleman he was, he had cleaned you up before snuggling in bed together until dreams inevitably consumed you. And now here you were, using one of his arms that he can't feel anymore as your pillow and your bodies exchanging heat.
Then his mouth lowered, down your chin, to your throat, and to the delicate dip between your neck and shoulder. Planting butterfly kisses on your skin, lips tracing and eyes memorizing every perfect imperfection that dotted your body like constellations.
He noticed your breathing slowly growing uneven, your nipples salaciously peaking through your tank top. He knew he had to stop. He had to, but...
He lifted his free hand, inching towards your breasts before freezing, clenching into a tight fist that had his nails digging into his palm.
His cheeks bloomed red, pulling away and laying on his back as he stared up blankly at the ceiling. What the fuck was he doing?
"Jake, mate... I know you're there, might as well say something, yeah?" Steven whispered.
'Your senses are improving, ese.' Jake snickered. 'Is that why you stopped? No need to be shy, it's just the same as watching porn.'
Steven turned redder, clearing his throat. "Jake, you know you can meet Y/N too, right?"
Silence greeted him. Steven waited patiently, giving his alter all the time he needed. As rough around the edges as they may be, the boys all cared about each other and Steven knew that all Jake needed--deserved--was time. Hell, he and Marc didn't even know Jake existed for a while until he finally felt comfortable enough to reveal himself.
'Nah, ese.' Jake snorted, though his voice held a certain heaviness to it. 'She's all yours. You deserve her, Steven.'
"You're a part of me, Jake. You deserve her, too."
'Don't think your little cariño would appreciate it so much that you're wanting to hand her off to some other asshole.' Jake scoffed.
"I'm not 'handing her off', you git. I wanna...share." Steven mumbled the latter, gulping thickly.
'Steven...' Jake sighed, but Steven sensed intrigue in his tone. 'I don't know what the fuck you expect from this talk, ese. We only share the same body, that's it.'
"You're lying and you know it. Two months working with Y/N, I never said anything, but I knew you were always there. This damn body isn't the only thing we share, 'cause I know your feelings are just the same as mine."
It was then that you mewled softly, shifting and wrapping an arm around Steven's waist and cuddling close to his side with a content little smile on your lips as you slept.
Steven melted and he felt Jake do so, too.
"I'm not giving you an out, mate." Steven chuckled, pressing a tender kiss to the top of your head. "I'm absolutely buggered and so are you."
♡•••🌙•••♡
Steven, that absolute fucking puta.
As soon as Jake opened his eyes, dread filled him. Slowly turning his head and seeing your back to him, he knew Steven gave up control at some point and forced Jake to come out from the shadows.
He's tried multiple times to drag that pendejo back out, but Steven has obviously put up a block between them. Jake sighed frustratedly, his gaze lingering on you once more.
His heart ached. And fuck it hurts.
He wasn't Steven.
He did not deserve you.
He was dirty--rotten. He was only good for causing pain; even the ways in which he protected the boys were brutal, inhumane.
And he loved the chaos. Thrived in it.
When Steven met you for the first time, two months ago, that was what Jake intended to cause as well. Pain. Heartbreak.
Nothing more than another pretty notch to add to his belt.
But you...surprised him. You actually cared about Steven, gave him basic human respect and the time of day when no one else did and just fucking listened. Accepted him with open arms and such a kind, blinding smile. And pretty soon, Jake yearned for that, too. From you. Just you.
You didn't even know he existed--you didn't fucking care about him--and yet you smashed his glass heart into a thousand pieces, leaving him to find the sharpest shard and continuously stab himself as punishment.
That's what he deserved. Not you.
But oh... You looked so cold. Why were you so far away? What the hell were you thinking, pulling away from him?
Like a lion stalking its prey, Jake crawled towards you until he was on top of you. His dark eyes trailed down your sleeping form, so beautiful, so vulnerable. He didn't realize his hand was shaking slightly as it reached up to caress your face, breath hitching as his thumb glided across your bottom lip before slowly slipping it inside your mouth.
He watched, completely entranced, as your saliva coated his thumb and the way in which you squirmed so that you were now laying on your back, facing him. You were still asleep, though your brows creased together and your breathing grew shallow.
What were you dreaming about, Jake wondered? Were you dreaming about last night? Steven didn't feel him then, but Jake was there and it was the best torture he's ever endured.
He can make you feel good--better. And if there was any room in your heart (and legs) for him, he'd more than happily prove it to you.
But you were so kind, so sweet... Surely you'd accept him, too, right?
Surely you'd relieve him of his huge fucking hard-on, right?
He found himself lowering, lowering, lowering--then stopped just as his lips were about to meet yours.
No...
You didn't deserve this. You didn't deserve him.
As if he was just burnt, he sprang away from you and sat at the foot of the bed, keeping as much distance as possible. His head hung low, hands scrubbing his face in frustration before turning into self-loathing slaps.
He quickly got a hold of himself, lest you have a cruel awakening to him. Not Steven.
He looked over his shoulder. You really did look cold. He unchained the ankle restraint then stood up, walking over to your side and tucking the blanket over your unfairly scantily clad body.
God... How he wished he was the one keeping you warm.
He then shook his head, glancing towards the wall clock. 5:40 a.m.
He can sneak out and do some business for Khonshu. And by the time he returns, hopefully Steven does, too.
He has to.
♡•••🌙•••♡
You rolled over in bed, expecting to cuddle up next to something much more solid than a pillow. Your brows furrowed, a hand flying out to pat the bed and not finding what--who--it was seeking.
Your eyes snapped open and you bolted upright. You looked around in a frenzy, eyes still bleary with sleep and finding the apartment completely empty.
You then noticed the time on the wall clock. 7:20 a.m.
You were off work today, but you weren't sure if Steven had a shift. But even if he did, it was still too early for the museum to open.
So...
Where the hell was Steven?
He couldn't have ditched you...could he? No, that wasn't possible, this was his flat.
But wait... What if this was his subtle way of telling you to get lost? That he didn't want to see you still here when he comes back from wherever the fuck he went to?
You overstayed your welcome, didn't you? This was what it was about, isn't it? This was all your fault, right?
You were on the verge of hyperventilating when, at the corner of your eye, you spotted a bright yellow sticky note on top of the books on the bedside table. You quickly ripped it off, reading the messy, rushed handwriting.
Don't know when I'll be back. Just relax. Food for you is in the kitchen, amor.
You blinked away tears you didn't realize were forming once, twice, then bursted into laughter.
"Fuck, seriously, what is wrong with me?" You berated yourself, still laughing.
This was Steven. Of course he would never abandon you, and you would never abandon him.
He proved it to you, after all. The memories of last night terrorizing your brain once more, making you blush like a virgin (which you were--for now).
You wanted to prove yourself to him, too. And you're sure you'll think of something, but at the moment you became distracted as your eyes landed on Steven's black sweatshirt sprawled carelessly across the floor.
You put on your glasses then hopped off of the bed and picked up the sweatshirt, tugging it on and letting out a giggle as it drooped over your thighs, turning the sleeves into little hand mittens and your body and heart just feeling so warm.
You ambled over to the kitchen, seeing a plate of slightly burnt toast and scrambled eggs clumsily covered in plastic wrap on the small dining table. You chuckled softly, taking the plastic off before sitting down and having breakfast.
As you chewed, once again your brain couldn't help but wander off.
It was only a little thing. Such a stupid thing, really. But still, it just would not stop nagging you.
Amor. It was French for 'love'.
But... Steven didn't spell it with a U. It was supposed to be amour.
Amor, no U, was the Spanish spelling. And Steven, who seemed fluent in French, should know that.
But people make mistakes, and who were you to judge such a minuscule, silly mistake?
Before you could entertain yourself by ruminating over such nonsense some more, your ears perked up when you heard the lock click and the door opening and shutting close. You kept quiet, watching as Steven slowly trudged in.
He was wearing a flat cap and a trench coat, and from your spot in the kitchen he hasn't noticed you yet. But he looked...different.
You couldn't quite explain it, but he seemed...tense. On edge. An air of agitation surrounding him, stiff in his movements yet carrying a sense of confidence at the same time.
Wild.
You then swallowed, standing up from your chair and silently making your way over to Steven with his back turned to you as he busied himself with stripping off his coat and hanging it on the coat rack.
You wrapped your arms around his waist, feeling him jolt. But before he could react, you spoke up.
"I missed you..." You murmured, embracing him more tightly as you pressed your cheek to his back. "Don't do that again, please. At least wake me up if you're leaving."
Steven didn't say anything, completely rigid and gloved hands balled into tight fists.
Then it clicked.
"You're not Steven...are you?"
His shoulders jerked, and you pulled your face away to look up at him. But you never removed your arms, keeping them in place around his waist.
Then his shoulders drooped, hearing him take a sharp intake of breath before ever so slowly turning his head over his shoulder.
"Caught red-handed." His lips curled up into a smirk, dark eyes gleaming down at you. "You're much more observant than I thought, princesa."
Your breath hitched, mouth agape and eyes blown wide as you gawked at him. You didn't know what to feel. Well, there was definitely excitement, but you weren't sure if it was appropriate for you to feel such a way.
Regardless, you were glad Steven was open and honest with you from the get-go. You knew, at some point, it was inevitable that you'd meet the two other men he's mentioned. So, you weren't too taken aback to be experiencing this right now.
"Judging from your accent and what you called me just now... You must be Jake?" You queried, cocking your head to the side as you stared up at him. Funny, he shared the exact same body as Steven, but he was still...different. The way he held himself, the little quirk to his lips, the look in his eyes--it was all very distinct.
"Don't see why you gotta keep asking me questions, princesa. Seems like ya got it all figured out." Jake scoffed, amusement in his tone.
"Well... You certainly made an...impression when you asked me out." You spoke slowly, carefully, as if not daring to spook some wild animal. You wanted Jake to feel safe, welcomed; because it felt like Jake hasn't at all expected to be here right now, but you wanted to let him know that you didn't mind him. You were happy to be meeting him.
But Jake took it the wrong way. He read your body language as aloof, like you were just trying to be polite. And why wouldn't you be? You were naturally kind, but he knew better.
He was absolutely not supposed to be here. He was never supposed to meet you, never planned to. After all, you preferred Steven.
...Didn't you?
His jaw ticked, his hands untangling your arms around his waist before he spun on his heel to fully face you. You gasped as he did, paling at the sight of blood on his shirt.
"What happened?!" You panicked, your hands immediately touching his body, eyes frantically searching for any injuries. "Did someone hurt you?! Oh my god, who did this to you?!"
"It's not my blood."
You froze, a chill coursing through your veins. Slowly, your head tilted up, meeting his gaze. It was much darker than before, flecks of savagery brewing within. And yet, you also saw...loneliness.
Longing.
"Are you scared, Y/N?"
You held your breath, his voice cracking as he uttered your name for the first time. It was a simple question that had a painfully simple answer.
"I am."
Jake shut his eyes, inhaling deeply and letting it out in a wavering breath.
He fucking knew it.
"Jake..." His eyes snapped open at your voice, so soft, so unexpectedly calm. "Will you...hurt me?"
"I would never." He whispered--promised--holding your gaze sincerely. "I couldn't."
"I'm scared of the...things you can do, Jake." You admitted, noticing his Adam's apple bob as he gulped. His gaze fell to the floor, but you reached up, gently cupping the side of his face. "But...I'm not scared of you."
Jake met your eyes once more, his hardened expression softening as he sighed, nuzzling into your comforting hand. For the first time in a long time, he felt...safe. He was not one of Khonshu's pawns, he was not Steven or Marc's ruthless protector, he was simply...
Jake Lockley.
"I'm sorry..." He murmured, trembling hand reaching out and caressing your cheek; tenderly, fondly, lovingly. "I...was never supposed to meet you. I was fine watching you quietly. But last night, Steven said he wanted us to meet. For me to be a...part of what you have with him."
A deafening silence rang in your ears. Jake watched you with those intense, soulful eyes, brows furrowed and jaw clenched as he waited with bated breath for your reaction. Any reaction.
"Jake..." You have no idea how you even managed to speak, your volatile heartbeat replacing the silence. "Take a shower first, we'll talk after."
♡•••🌙•••♡
Water dripped from Jake's hair, his hands pressed against the wall with his head tilted down as he watched the pristine white tiles of the shower's floor stain red.
This was an all too familiar situation for him. Washing off blood that didn't belong to him, his body getting cleaned though never his damned soul. But it never bothered him before...until now.
He knew there was a chance you'd be awake when he returned, but he figured that he can just pretend to be Steven at least until that idiot takes control of the body again. Jake's done it convincingly enough a few times before back when Steven and Marc were still unaware of his existence, acting as one of them whenever something triggered them and he suddenly had to front.
But when you hugged him, he just...froze. It felt as if he was struck by lightning because this was real--you were real. Your heart-wrenching kindness and beauty were all directed towards him, and he was no longer just a pathetic fly on the wall through Steven's eyes.
But how could he be so fucking dumb? He never should've shown himself, he should've stayed away from the apartment even if it took all day and just let Steven deal with the consequences. And yet...he came back.
Because, the absolute truth is, he wanted to meet you. At his very core, he was a selfish bastard who wanted to be with you, no matter the punishment inflicted on him--he inflicts on himself.
But was he really being selfish?
As drastically different as they were, Steven and Marc managed to control their own separate lives. Steven had his job that he despised, but also the comfort of regularly getting a paycheck that provided for his daily needs. Marc was Khonshu's (main) Avatar and as draining as it was, he could still unwind after a long day with a pack of beer and a Chicago Cubs game playing on TV.
And then, of course, there were Moon Knight and Mr. Knight that ultimately tied them together.
But what about Jake? Was he nothing more than a punching bag for Marc and Steven, only seizing command and handling whatever shitshow they got themselves into that they were too weak to finish?
Jake knew that was his job--his purpose. And honestly, it was okay. He cared about the boys, and keeping them safe meant the same for him as well.
...Until you came along. And for the first fucking time, he actually wanted something. Yearned for someone. Just for himself, and not because of anyone else's expectations or demands of him.
He didn't realize it until you came crashing into Steven's--and his--life like some fucking meteorite, but he was empty. And on the extremely rare occasions that Jake was entitled to the body all for himself, he grew tired of being tired from aimlessly hopping bar to bar. Nearly wiping all his fucking memories out with heavy drinks and the need--the desperation--to forget about the problems he deliberately ignores, hides, even for one single measly night through fucking some random stranger he didn't and won't ever care about.
But you weren't a stranger, that was perfectly clear. Days bled into weeks, and weeks into months; and here you were now, looking all cute--tempting--wearing Steven's sweatshirt, eating breakfast in his home, as his girlfriend.
Steven's girlfriend. Not Jake's girlfriend.
"Jake, you know you can meet Y/N too, right?"
Steven's words from last night echoed in Jake's head, taunting him. And the ridiculous proposition that followed afterwards, of the two of them sharing you.
"You're a part of me, Jake. You deserve her, too."
And maybe, just maybe...Steven's right.
Maybe Jake did deserve you.
But did you deserve him?
"What's got you looking all emo?" Jake's head abruptly whipped around, seeing you with one hand holding the shower curtain open while the other clutched onto a towel covering your body.
Your naked body.
Jake's mouth went dry, completely paralyzed. All he could do was let his eyes scan you from head to toe, undressing you in his mind. He's already seen you last night and he thought he'd be fine just basking you in from Steven's point of view, but oh...he thought dead wrong.
Because now he really wanted to touch you. Feel you. Make you come undone, all because of him. All for him.
"What the hell are you doing here?" His question came out sharper than he intended it to, eyes narrowing as he watched your gaze drop, shifting on your feet uncertainly along with the tantalizing way you bit your lip.
You seemed to be engaging in a silent war with yourself before you shook your head, straightening up as you dared to meet his eyes and slowly dropped the towel to the floor.
"I told Steven this before, but I prefer to get things over with." You smiled a bit sheepishly, stepping into the shower; the warm drizzle of water helped to thaw the ice cold sensation anxiety gripped you with. "I'm a very impatient woman, Mr. Lockley."
"And you think jumping into the shower completely naked with a man you barely know is the answer to your impatience, señorita?" Jake arched a brow, an amused smirk playing on his lips.
"Well, it's not like I can get into the shower with clothes on, right? That's just fucking stupid." You scoffed, playfully rolling your eyes. "Besides... It's because I want to get to know you that I'm here."
"This is a dangerous game you're playing, princesa." Jake murmured, his smirk instantly vanishing; that furrowed brows, clenched jaw sternness once more overtaking his striking features as he regarded you. "I'm not your sweet, sensitive little boyfriend. I'm not Steven." He practically hissed out the name, though there was more sadness to it than venom.
"This isn't a game to me, Jake." You stated firmly, standing your ground as you held your chin high and levelled your gaze with his. "None of this is. I take Steven very seriously--I take our relationship very seriously." You paused, taking a deep, shaky breath. "And I know, maybe I'm moving too fast, and I totally understand your doubts about this--about me. But I'm not a fucking dumbass. I know you're not Steven and I like you, anyway."
Jake was rarely speechless, but even as his mouth parted to say something--anything--nothing came out. He felt something fall down his cheek, and he wasn't too sure if it was water or the strange liquid that suddenly made his vision all blurry.
But he didn't have much time to ponder on it when your hand gently pressed against his cheek, your eyes kind and full of adoration, the same adoration you always bless Steven with and something Jake believed was only a far-off miracle for him.
"Y/N..." He choked out, glossy dark eyes intently set on you. "I'm a monster."
"You're not a monster, Jake." You were quick to counter, taking a step closer, now being chest to chest with Jake. "You're a part of Steven, and anything--anyone--that's a part of him is beautiful. And you sure as hell deserve to live your own life, too. And, well, if you'll have me..." You blushed, looking down. "...I would really, really like to get to know you better, Jake Lockley."
Silence smothered you, wrapping its invisible claws around your neck, and you now fully understood what people meant when they say something takes forever. You thought it would be easier and much less frightening if the ground actually opened up and swallowed you whole, but Jake finally put you out of your misery, his hand turning off the shower and a low chuckle bubbling out of him.
"Well... Damn." He smirked, cocking his head down at you, though his smug demeanour couldn't mask the rosiness that dusted his cheeks. "You really do like me and Steven, huh, querida? Or maybe it's just your boobs up against me that's convincing me."
"Well, if it's helping you to believe me, then I'm not complaining." You giggled, wrapping your arms around his neck, pushing your breasts against him. Both of your breaths stuttered at the close, intimate contact, and you whimpered as his hands landed on your hips, callused fingers squeezing your soft flesh.
"Dios mío..." He growled lowly, his hands slowly, reverently travelling up the curves of your body, leaving a burning wake, before dipping once more and giving your ass a hard smack.
"Ah..!" You gasped, lurching forward, your face bumping against his solid chest. You felt his chest vibrate as a deep laugh rumbled out of him, one hand fisting your hair and pulling your head back.
"I ain't lying when I said I'm not your sweet, sensitive boyfriend." There was mania in his eyes, baring shiny white teeth as he grinned widely at you; like a shark who's smelled blood--your blood--from a mile away, he's set his target and can't be satisfied by anything, anyone else. "Then again, if you could see Steven's thoughts like I can, 'sweet and sensitive' aren't completely accurate for him."
You gulped, but not from fear. You squeezed your thighs together, pupils dilating as you stared up at Jake. "I-I don't mind if you or Steven aren't sweet and sensitive. I wanna be treated nice, but there are plenty of ways 'nice' can be translated to..." You placed a hand on his abs, lips parting as you traced along his taut muscles, looking like some fucking Greek sculpture--a god--with the way his wet body shimmered a divine bronze. "Don't you think so...Papi?"
With no warning, you felt the air get knocked out of you as his lips collided with yours, attacking you; tongues intertwining with a clash of teeth, the moist smack of your lips harmonizing with the vulgar moans Jake drew out of you.
You felt Jake's neediness, the desperation underlying his roughness--as if this was not just the first, but the only time he'd get to kiss you and have you for himself.
As if you'd ever allow for this to be the only time.
Your hands fell to his shoulders, nails breaking his skin and marking him with crescent indents. He groaned as you did, kissing you with even more fervour, fiery passion never ceasing as you both chased after that hellish ecstasy; seizing, bruising, suffocating you.
More, more, more. Giving and taking, taking, taking.
You just could never have enough, clueless as to where you started and Jake ended, Jake's tongue practically down your throat now. You know you needed air, your eyes rolling to the back of your head, but your body refused.
If this was how you died, then you'd die an elated woman.
But Jake suddenly pulled away from you, making you whine loudly. Your hands pawed at his chest, tears springing to your eyes and your ears couldn't even register the pitiful pleas that tumbled out of your mouth for more, more, more.
"You're such a fucking slut, aren't you, mi amor?" Jake snickered, one hand wrapping around your neck, thumb stroking the column of your throat, squeezing just enough to feel as if your head was floating. "Steven always saw you as this pure, innocent angel. But you're not, aren't you? You wanna be corrupted, don't you? You wanna be my pretty little devil, slut?"
"I'll be anything for you, Papi." You replied breathlessly, tears staining your scarlet cheeks. "Just be my everything."
"I'll be whatever--do whatever--for you, mi vida." His voice was low, barely above a whisper, but you heard him loud and clear, his earnesty and sweetness cloying. His other hand caressed your face before he leaned down, his tongue licking away your salty tears, a reprieve from the rapturous flames that engulfed him. "Now... What do you want Papi to do?" He purred, smirking wolfishly down at you. "You want me to fuck you? Spread your little virgin pussy, fill you up with my cock? Wanna see how much you can take, cariño. Take all my cum, don't waste a single fucking drop."
As tempting as his filthy words were, as much as you wanted to, you remembered how Steven refused to have sex with you last night. Of his promise that he'll make love to you another time, when he was better prepared with condoms. And fuck, you wanted him--them--so badly. Steven and Jake. But you respected Steven and his decision, and you did also want for your lovemaking to be special.
"Can I taste your cock, Papi?" You asked, biting your lip as you met Jake's gaze shyly. You felt like a mouse and he was the lion, yet you held the power in whatever was going to happen. "I-I promise I'll take it all... Take all your cum, like a good girl."
Jake knew that you chose not to have sex with him out of respect for Steven, and that only made him love you more. He felt a pang in his heart and a smile tugged up the corners of his lips, eyes locking with yours, full of tenderness and affection.
Right then and there, he knew that you were "the one". For him and Steven.
"Get on your knees like a good fucking girl, then." He breathed, and you didn't hesitate as you instantly dropped to your knees, breasts jiggling slightly as you did. Your eyes widened as his cock stood proudly, mere inches away from your face.
"I...I'm sorry if I'm...bad." Your voice came out as a squeak, mentally slapping yourself before clearing your throat. "I-I've never done this before!"
"You better have not or else I'll hunt down and kill all the fuckers you've ever been with." He barked out a laugh, but his eyes were dark and serious.
Murder was not something Jake Lockley ever joked about, after all.
Strangely enough, you found his possessiveness...sexy. Which only meant that Jake was already corrupting you.
But was that really such a bad thing?
You shook your head, focusing on the cock--erm, task--at hand. Your hand wrapped around his shaft, hearing Jake breathe sharply through his nose as you did. You licked your lips as you watched the pre-cum drip out of the tip, so curious, so transfixed like a moth to a flame.
Your tongue then darted out, experimentally licking the milky fluid. Jake threw his head back with a guttural groan; you've barely even started, and it made you fucking giddy that he reacted like this.
"Jake..." You murmured, giggling softly. You peered up at him through your long lashes, flashing him a dazzling smile. "You're so beautiful, Jake."
"That ain't something you should call a man, mi vida." Jake scoffed, but the crimson tint on his cheeks have spread like wildfire to the tips of his ears and neck. "Especially not when you're the beautiful one."
"Going soft on me now, Jakey?" You teased lightheartedly, slowly beginning to stroke his length.
Jake's breath hitched, brows furrowing as he watched you intently, attentively. "You really are a little devil, Y/N." He chuckled deeply, and you knew that meant trouble. "You think I'm going soft? Looks like you really have a lot you need to know about me."
Like before, his hand fisted your hair, pulling your head back and making you look up at him. "Open up, slut." And you did, opening your mouth and sticking your tongue out. You flinched slightly as his cock hit your tongue, his other hand grabbing his member and moving it around on your tongue, painting it white.
"Now you're gonna be a good cocksucker, got it?" He grinned down devilishly at you, eyes twinkling with sheer, wicked glee. "You're gonna make Papi cum, like the good whore that you are."
You nodded hastily, eagerly. And you just couldn't fucking take it anymore, jostling forward and burying his cock in your wet, hot mouth.
"That's. Fucking. It." Jake hissed, his grip on your hair tightening ever so slightly. Slowly, you began to bob your head, your mouth accommodating his size. You briefly wondered how anyone could ever even compare this to a banana or a popsicle stick; it was much bigger and your jaw started to hurt, which Jake quickly noticed as you tensed.
"Hey, relax." He cooed, reaching down to tenderly wipe away the tears you didn't realize were flowing down your cheeks. "Easy, Y/N. Relax your mouth, loosen up your throat... Fuck, yeah, that's it. Keep going, hermosa."
With newfound confidence and assurance, you gradually increased your pace. You hollowed your cheeks, your tongue sliding along the underside of his cock with each rhythmic bop of your head. Up, down, up, down--Jake's sinful groans bouncing off the walls of the bathroom, never breaking eye contact as you burned all of him into memory.
Then your surprised gasp was muffled as his foot pressed against your clit, only offering you a cocky smirk in return.
He began to move his foot, his toes budging your clit and stroking along your pussy. You moaned around his cock, grinding against his foot for more friction. Then his other hand grabbed onto your hair, both of his hands now pushing and pulling your head up, down, up, down--drool spilling down the sides of your mouth, resisting the urge to gag as the tip of Jake's cock pounded your throat, your hands floundering to his thighs as you clung on for dear life.
"Fuck, look at you... Una putita tan bonita solo para mí." He laughed, the thrusts of his hips growing fiercer, more rabid as he mercilessly fucked your throat. "Wanna taste me, mi vida? Think you've earned it?"
All you could do was nod, nod, nod--looking up at him pleadingly as you continued to desperately grind yourself against his foot, your own orgasm fast approaching.
Jake's jeering laughter soon stuttered into a heavy, gasping moan; his eyes squeezing shut as his head fell back, hitting the wall. You felt his cock twitch, releasing his seed, shooting down your throat and his balls slamming against your chin.
Your own release coated Jake's foot, your entire body shuddering from the intensity of it all and coughing as Jake finally withdrew his cock out of your mouth. But you didn't have time to revel in the afterglow as Jake's hand wrapped around your neck once more, dragging you up and crashing his lips with yours. You swapped spit and cum, but neither of you cared; the two of you groping, squeezing, clinging onto each other any which way your needy hands could fumble.
You didn't keep track anymore of who pulled away first, laughter ringing in your ears as you both grinned at each other; spent, happy.
The dawn of something new, exciting, promising shining between the two of you.
Wordlessly, Jake turned on the shower again. Then he grabbed the soap, his hands gliding along your smooth skin, his lips attaching to the crook of your neck where he could see the faint pinpricks of his handprint slowly materializing.
"Did I hurt you, mi vida?" As rough of a lover as Jake was, none of his pleasure mattered if you didn't enjoy yourself.
"A little bit." You admitted, wrapping your arms around his neck and kissing the top of his head. "But it's okay. I...liked it." You blushed furiously.
"Fuck..." He grumbled, pulling away and looking very much like a kicked puppy, something that you thought only Steven was a pro at. "As cute as you are blushing like that, princesa, I'm so fucking sorry. I know I should know when to stop, when to be gentle...but those are not really what I'm good at." His eyes drifted down, and you can tell that he had a lot more to say. A lot more to regret. "I'm sorry, Y/N."
"I forgive you, Jake. Now please... Stop beating yourself up, okay?" You cupped his face, pecking his nose and meeting his gaze. "I'm not lying when I said I liked it, but don't blame yourself too much. I also should've done something, spoken up if it was too painful for me." Your fingers ran through his hair, smiling softly, lovingly at him. "All of this is new for me--for us. But it's okay, 'cause we can learn together, yeah? And if you'd like, we can come up with a safe word if things get too rough."
Jake hesitated, wondering if you were really telling the truth and not just trying to comfort him. But one look at your sweet, loving smile was more than enough for his worries and doubts to fade away, his own smile gracing his lips and his hands holding your own that were so gently, kindly cupping his face.
"I think that would be great. Any idea what the safe word should be?"
"I was thinking 'Khonshu'." Your answer made Jake snort before he bursted into laughter, you joining shortly after.
"Mi vida, if you say that bastardo's name while we're fucking, you really are gonna make me go soft." He chuckled, pinching your cheek and kissing your forehead.
"Fine, fine! Clearly coming up with a safe word is what I'm not good at. Let's figure it out together." You playfully rolled your eyes, giggling and kissing his cheek. "Anyway, I'll head out first. But don't take too long or else I'll jump in the shower with you again and for the sake of Steven's water expenses, you do not want that happening."
"On one condition, señorita. You have to wear my clothes when you get out, not Steven's." He hummed to which you laughed and nodded, but just as you were about to step out of the shower, Jake suddenly grabbed your wrist and pulled you back to his chest.
He leaned down to your ear, voice a low purr as he spoke; like it was a secret, a sacred oath between only the two of you.
"El amor de mi vida, mi salvavidas... Nunca te dejaré ir."
Your lips curled up into a smile, your heart swelling achingly within your chest. You turned around and leaned up on your tiptoes, your lips melting perfectly together with Jake's, becoming one.
"I love you, Jake Lockley." You whispered, sealing your oath. "Now... Don't keep me waiting. You know I'm an impatient woman."
Jake watched with a dumb, lovestruck grin as you pulled away giggling, finally stepping out of the shower and closing the bathroom door behind you. And as soon as you were gone, Jake piped up to the other occupant in the bathroom.
"Steven, ese... I know you're there, might as well say something, huh?"
'Bloody HELL, mate...' Steven's words stumbled out in a rushed, breathless breath. 'That was MENTAL.'
"You're welcome for the free show, ese." Jake chuckled, standing under the spray of the shower as he washed himself off.
Although Jake couldn't see Steven, he knew that the poor, flustered English man was having a damn heart attack at this very moment.
'That was...that was...' Steven was completely at a loss for words, making Jake smirk.
"The hottest fucking thing you've ever seen? Yeah, I know. Y/N's our sexy girlfriend, after all." Jake turned off the shower, hopping out and drying himself off with a towel. "You're right, by the way. We're both absolutely fucked."
'I'm just glad it all worked out, mate.' Steven replied, relief and happiness flooding his voice. 'You deserve her. WE deserve her. It's just...' He trailed off, sighing deeply. 'Now that I think about it, I'm worried about Marc.'
"Fuck Marc." Jake snapped, his eyes settling on the mirror, Steven's reflection staring back at him with an anxious crease between his brows and lips downturned. "We deserve to live our own lives, too, Steven. That cabrón's just gonna have to deal with it."
And deal with it, Marc will. But...
You'll have to deal with Marc, too.
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citizensun · 6 months
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Queerness and the House of Usher (spoilers!)
See I just added these Thoughts to the tags in @quecksilvereyes 's post but now I have Feelings too
TFotHoU (or HoU, as I will refer to it here), as expected from a Mike Flannagan show, has a bunch of Queer Rep™ to talk about. HoU is, also, about remarkably evil people - amoral capitalists who'll step over anyone if it means they'll get something from it. And look! Some of them are queer! Kinky too!
That's bad queer representation... right?
The show isn't that clear when stablishing sexualities, but we see that at least three of the Usher kids - Napoleon, Camille and Victorine - have same sex SOs/assistants with curious job descriptions. Prospero's taste for orgies probably implies queerness too, but honestly I don't remember if he gets it going with any guys in the story. I honestly have no idea about Tamerlane's voyerism thingie and Frederick is the only one with a "traditional family" going on.
Unrelated, but: Leo is definitely cheating on his bf Julius. Completely dismissing about his worries for him too. And for his cat. That's objectively evil, clearly. Vic literally killed her fiancée Alessandra, though she didn't stuff her under the floorboard, which is an L when compared to Poe's original. Cam doesn't believe in true love. Perry blackmailed his sister in law. Mean. He's also got a surprisingly high kill count for the family's disappointment, but since unlike Roderick he only killed rich people, we stan. I don't belong in Kinky spaces so I haven't got a big take on Tammie, only that - well, she's completely dismissing of her husband and sees him as a prop, just like the sex worker she hires.
Huh.
See, the nature of a story called "the fall of X family" is that X family is going to be the main character. The title kinda implies that they're falling for a reason, ergo, they're despicable fucking people. And they're queer! They're very queer. Many flavors of gay. They're the main characters, and they're monsters, and they're gay.
No, that's not bad rep.
Queerness as a movement, a community and a theory is very focused on scaping a cisheteronormative society's binaries (ie man/woman, husband/wife, public/private) and creating living conditions to those who fall outside of these categories - mlms and wlws, the trans, the nbs, the aros and aces... we are all queer, strange and estranged from this weird and limited worldview. And so we create a community for ourselves. It's very focused on care and anti-stablishment. Since a cisheteronormative society tends to be very white, rich and western, it's also focuses on anti-racism, anti-capitalism, anti-imperialism. Y'all know that, this is Tumblr and we love leftist Discourse.
I also know many, many gay people irl who are not like that at all. Libertarians, anarcho-capitalists, terfs, completely apolitical people and the like. Sexuality at it's core is personal, not political, so there are gay people out there who are perfectly comfortable with their sexuality on an individual level but do not see the point of getting involved in the broader context. They're queer, but are they...?
Well—
Not to mention there's lots of asshole gays out there! Don't you have a shitty ex? Have you never been almost run over by a drunken butch who blew cigar smoke into your face? I have! Life experiences are just like that. Maybe you should touch more grass. You'll probably find a lucky gift from your neighbour's dog, who is an astrology-obsessed bisexual and also really hot but stopped making out with you at a party once she found out you're a pisces (the neighbour, not the dog).
(Granted, none of this is as bad as implanting an experimental heart contraption into the fiancée you just killed because she dared to have ethical principles and then being so consumed with grief you stab yourself in front you'd your dad but you know how it goes. We're not the 1%.)
My point is, queer people are people. We are complex. We fuck up, and sometimes there's still times to fix things and sometimes... there isn't. We're consumed by jealousy and regret and sometimes we're so locked into our own head we stop believing the rest of the world is real too. Just like any other people, because unfortunately, queerness isn't a sign of morality.
And even if queerness does mean community, kindness and acceptance, tell me... Where the hell would the Usher kids get those from? The people around them are not really peers – they're ass-istants, blowjob-giving apartments, orgy mates, heart surgery providers, hired fitness moneybags, perfect housewives. Even if the partners are all shown to care for the Ushers, there's still a distance, a power gap, that makes the relationships fundamentally wrong.
And the partners? Arguably they're the good queer rep in the show, but look – even when Julius and Alessandra are shown to be good people (or at least people with an ethical boundary), they're not the good gays, they're simply the good SO's to a family of psychos. Exactly like Bill and Morrie, who afawk are straight people.
Which leads us to HoU's parameter of morality - Auguste Dupin. He refuses to drink the Amontillado, symbol of all the Usher opulence over the years. He got screwed over by the Usher twins and by the Raven herself, but he refused to cave in (except for the informant part, admittedly). He's not a good gay guy; he is gay and he is a good man.
The fundamental difference between our show's main tragic yaoi couple isn't that Auggie is a happily out gay man (and therefore is good) while Roderick is a sad divorced hetero (and therefore is bad). Auggie is the richer man because he is a good man; he has a spouse and children and grandchildren he loves with all his heart. He has a family and a community and he has found a sort of happiness no money can buy. Roderick owns the world – but what does he really have? What do his children even have? How could they ever build communities for themselves if they were never in one? Their father made them compete for his love. He never nurtured their bonds, he just showered them with money and excess until it was too much for them to handle. Juno herself pointed out - they were never a family. The House of Usher was only that. A house. It is empty and soulless.
What is queerness without a community? How could the people who represent the relentless corporate normativity and cutthroat capitalism ever be good queer rep? How can they even be queer?
Hear me out: on the most individual, simple level, being queer is still about not fitting in. These kids are bastards. They are are PoC and women in a predominantly male and white dominated space. They're on top of the world, but they're still outsiders to their own House. How could they not be queer?
And yes, I know this discussion takes a different turn when it comes to representation in media, but it's not like Flannagan fell into a Hays Code-era flamboyant villain trope. Queerness is just there. Just like Victorine and August are both black people in (arguably) the opposite ends of the morality spectrum, there are queer characters of many kinds here. The story just happens to be about the fucked up ones.
HoU is a poignant critique of capitalism and a surprisingly funny adaptation of Poe. We'll judge it by that. It happens to be queer – more things should be.
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eusaevi · 5 months
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♡ you and satoru were rivals when you both were still studying at tokyo jujutsu high. there was always this sexual tension between the two of you, but it was always pushed to the side. now, after a year since graduating, you met each other at suguru's house party.
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satoru grins, his eyes locking onto yours. "you know," he said, his voice a low, seductive murmur, "i've been wondering what it would be like to run into you again."
you swallowed hard, a wave of emotions crashing back over you. "have you?" your voice was barely more than a whisper.
his fingers brushed a strand of hair away from your face, sending a delicious shiver down your spine. "yeah, i have. i've missed our... competitive spirit." he said it with a playful glint in his eye, hinting at the sensual tension that had always simmered beneath the surface.
a nervous laugh slipped from your lips. "it was more than just competition, wasn't it?" your heart pounded in your chest.
satoru's gaze softened, and he took a step closer, closing the gap between you. "you're right," he confessed intimately. "it was something i couldn't put into words back then, but now... i can't help but wonder what might have been."
the world seemed to fade away entirely as satoru's hand cupped your cheek, his thumb gently tracing your lips. the electricity in the air crackled, and the longing you'd both kept buried for so long was now impossible to ignore. you could practically taste the intensity of your mutual desire, and it was intoxicating.
"me too," you whispered, your breath hitching as he leaned in closer.
"glad to know you felt it too," satoru murmured before closing the gap between your lips.
the moment your mouths met was like a wildfire consuming dry wood, an overdue explosion of desire that sent a surge of heat coursing through your body. all your inhibitions fell away as you succumbed to the intoxication of his kiss.
his lips were demanding yet tender, and the urgency in his kiss made your head spin. it felt like all those years of suppressed attraction had finally erupted, and you both surrendered to your deepest cravings.
tasting him was a decadent indulgence, a sinful mix of yearning and sensuality that left you gasping for more. your tongues moved in a slow, seductive dance, exploring the depths of desire that had smoldered beneath the surface for so long. each stroke of his tongue against yours was a lingering caress that sent shivers down your spine.
satoru's hand, previously cradling your cheek, ventured down your back in a teasing, tantalizing journey that left a trail of longing in its wake. his fingers gripped your waist, pulling you closer, your bodies melding in an intimate embrace.
the kiss deepened, and the heat between you escalated with every passing second. it was a kiss that spoke of unbridled lust and the magnetic pull that had always simmered between you.
when you finally pulled back, your breaths came in sultry sighs, and you gazed into satoru's eyes. the connection between you felt more potent than ever, and it was clear that this reunion was more than just a chance encounter. it was a rekindling of an old flame that had never truly gone out. after everything, you had rediscovered each other, and this time, there was no rivalry, only a deep, passionate love that had finally found its way to the surface.
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♡ 2 months passed by real quick. send help, i'm back to the hard core kpop fan girl life after 8 years 😭 (like I HAVE to go to the concerts if there's any) going to BamBam's area52 concert really solidified it for me 🫠 ♡ that aside, how've u guys been? to all my jjk ppl who read the manga, hope y'all been fine cos i'm still not ♡ reblogs and interactions are appreciated, luvs xx
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