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#why i dont love those other platforms the way it seems everyone else does
temporalhemorrhage · 5 years
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im so frustrated with social media nowadays... i dont know if its just because i dont know how to use it properly or because of genuine algorithm issues on the platform but like.... HOW does ANYONE find ANYONE on there???
like okay yes, there’s tags on instagram- i GET that- and it does seem that people use those tags to find new art because thats how im pretty sure ive gained the followers i do have (since its not like there’s a reblog function on there or anything where someone can expose an artist to their followers and thus increase their visibility)... but they also just instituted a new algorithm that basically mutes anyone who doesnt post/respond regularly (which can apparently be as little time as a week/few days without posting), so that’s a no go for anyone who doesn’t already have a large following
then twitter?? is just???? a void????? like i literally have NO idea how anyone finds anyone on there or how you’re supposed to grow your audience or even find people that you know from other social media??  i recently started using hashtags on there for my art (something that im still very wary of because NOT A SINGLE ARTIST I FOLLOW uses them so idk what the commonly used or appropriate ones are??? or if its even considered appropriate to put them on your art post?? like i said- not a single of the nearly 100 artists i follow uses them so im just like lol guess ill die) and yet i still feel like im just yelling into a void (with about the same reaction as you would expect from that action)
meanwhile, tumblr is the only place ive ever been able to build any sort of following and find friends/people i like and content i want, yet aside from its slow decline over the past couple years, im now hearing from artists that they’re barely getting any notes or interactions, even when they have 67k followers or some shit, so they’re all leaving for other social medias
which again returns me to my previous point of HOW are the other ones any better??? how did you amass 112k followers on twitter or w/e and 98k on instagram (if not just migration from an already established platform? which is literally my only working theory)? at least on here i can throw shit in a tag and i know ppl will see it- or i have ppl who consistently reblog my shit so i know that will introduce it to a new audience- how does that work on twitter/instagram???
ive yet to be introduced to A SINGLE NEW ARTIST on those platforms, which tells me that its not just my work that isn’t being spread, but that it’s just how the platform functions (e.g. you can show things to your followers, but their followers will rarely if ever see it, and there’s very few options for otherwise increasing your visibility), which im sure is fine and all if you already have a couple hundred or thousand followers under your belt, but for people starting absolutely fresh? what chance do they have? how do they reach the people they want to reach?
forget art- how do you find FRIENDS on there? how does ANYONE connect with other like-minded people or with those who share their interests? i just dont understand how anyone feels like these sites are anything other than just shouting into the void and ~hoping~ that the void is already occupied and listening...
(and please know this has nothing to do with my content- i understand that i dont put out anything worth paying attention to, so its not like im bitter i dont have followers or anything. it just feels like im missing out on some core knowledge that everyone else knows (which coincidentally is the story of my life) and that it’s going to fuck me over big time when i actually do try to gain an audience)
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ackerpreach · 3 years
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This ending .... I can name 500 reasons and I will name them right now, because I don’t think I’m the only one who is upset with how things turned out. (Also, A positive message for all of you at the end)
MAJOR LEAKS SPOILERS/ READ WITH CAUTION
Update: after reading more theories from fellow RM bloggers, and sleeping over it one day, this entire chapter might be an april fools... Don't fully lose hope yet beautiful people. It's me just giving a review on a possible fake April fools chapter
After following this franchise since 2013, so nearly a DECADE. this ending is a pure disserve to the entire fandom. I feel like Yams has rushed it just for the sake of being done with the entire manga. So many things are left open, characters and their developemt are reverted back all the way to chapter 1 or are left even worse than that...
Mikasa’s worthless character development/ Aaronmika’s horrible toxic codependent relationship 
Oh honey... Let’s start with how horrible Isayama has treated her. We were all rooting for her, because we all felt like she was so misunderstood. She had a horrible childhood and imprinted on a guy who treated her like trash 99 percent of the story. And then, slowly but surely, she starts to realize she has to stop obsessing over him in the uprising arc with the help of a real man who treats her like a queen, more importantly, he treats her like a real human being. This man sees her for her abilities and that she has the power to be self dependent. She learned parts of herself, that she was able to work together with him like no one else could.  She learned parts of herself she was unable to do so if she kept obsessing about Aaron. All this love, care, mutual understanding and RESPECT these two shared. 
but...NAH FUCK THAT, right Yams?? Throw all this development away, all this bonding. Let’s make the main female lead even more yandere than she already was in the first season. Let her make out with his decapacitated head (like dude, this is also pure disrespect to Aaron’s dead body btw) and let her obsess even more about the guy who has treated her no better than a piece of toilet cloth 99 percent of the time. The guy who was never really appreciative in front of her for saving his ass billions of times, who always pushed her away, who yells at her and snaps at her whenever he can instead of reasoning and talking calmly with her in mature way. (EVEN PARODY YOUTUBE CHANNELS WHO DONT SHIP ANYTHING MAKE IT A TROPE WHERE AARON TELLS MIKASA HE HATES HER GUTS WHENEVER HE CAN) 
Then after all that, suddenly Yams tries to last minute persuade us Aaron’s always been head over heels for her???  He should have build their relationship better which he hasn’t even tried to do so... He must be thinking his fans are stupid for eating this from his hands.    
Like seriously??? What is this??? 
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Isayama is just fully contradicting himself. It’s like someone tipped him off with a buttload of money for him to write Aaron like this to satisfy shipping needs and to cash in those extra money’s from it. Even if he tried to cater to Erem*ika, this is not how you write a loving and caring couple which people will root for. 
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This next two panels just freaking infuriates me to the core of my soul. I can’t even describe how dissapointed I am with Mikasa. 
Why is she clutching that head so obsessively like that?  Why is she walking and turning her back away from her comrades? After everything they have done for her, after all they’ve been through?! After everything Armin has done? Standing up for Mikasa, beating up Aaron for hurting her. I feel like even Jean, Connie and Sasha have cared more for her in a healthy way.  Sure, Aaron cares for her romantically too apparently (What a twist Yams :)), but has he aided her to becoming a mentally healthier individual? Has he aided in her mental stability? The answer is a big fat NO!  All I see between these two after today’s raw Chapter’s are too Yandere obsessed individuals who have no clue on how to maintain a healthy relationship. 
Love should only go as far as the heart can endure and it seems like her character is not willing to be aware of that. Even Armin was able to let go of Aaron in those latest panels. Why does her entire character resolve around this guy??? I really do not understand. Her Ackerbond and her age is not an excuse for her to throw her life away like this. 
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Shonen’s disgusting portrayal of women 
I’ve seen this countless of times in the many years I’ve watched anime. SasuS*ku from Naruto, Ichih*me from Bleach, Shinji and that oranged hair girl from Neon Evangelion.. Why do these women get decreased to simpletons with one single goal? And that is to obsess over a bland male lead who either treats them like trash or doesn’t notice them up until the last last chapter (LITERALLY WHAT YAMS HAS DONE). Some go even as far as the male leading wanting the kill the female love interest and yet the female lead is still in love with them???. It’s disgusting for him to write the MAIN female character this way. 
It’s dissapointing we believed in Isayama doing Mikasa’s character right. That she’s finally being able to let go of her codependency and to live for herself maybe live in Hizuru and find more about her roots???, but every single time she shows some improvement, it’s burried deep in the ground again by the Author. It almost seems like a lowkey kink of some of the male Mangaka’s to write about a girl obsessing over them no matter what. I see this so many times to the point that I truly stand behind it that some of them might have this fantasy. 
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I wished he didn’t portray her last panels like this. Everyone else is living their lives while Mikasa is still grieving about him. I’m not saying she’s not allowed to grieve and everyone takes it at their own pace, but cmon... Show her living her life too. This is too much. Her being next to his grave and grieving him as her last panels just shoves it in our faces that YET AGAIN, BEING OBSESSED WITH AARON IS ALL HER CHARACTER STANDS FOR. 
I truly despise how Isayama handles her grieving, kissing his decapacitated head, carrying it around like some handbag, and her last panels being thissss.
The world leaving Paradis alone miraciously after all that??? 
It’s so weird and out of place with so many political feuds and disagreements between the world and Paradis, the entire Rumbling happening and we can see Mikasa just chilling outside in Paradis with no one bothering them. You can see the rings of the walls in the picture below.  I don’t know the exact reason behind as the manga is still in Korean, but from what I see, the story went the route of: throwing a happy ending without enough proper reason and  it was all fixed just like that in a snap! It doesn’t fit the entire narrative of attack on titan for things to be so peacful out of nowhere. When it comes to the narrative, how things work in that world, how hard it is to achieve peace, everything made somewhat sense up until chapter 138. 139 seems so so out of place...  It’s like I’m reading a chapter from a totally different manga. 
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Aaron Yoghurt got defeated so easily/ Aaron’s character assassination
The build up on the first part of the rumbling was great, those kids carrying coins. You could feel humanity’s fear and Aaron’s hatred in those pages. As if he truly had a goal and he has turned away completely from his comrades and his closest friends with no return. The world seemed truly doomed, but he  got defeated just like that. He was in the nape all this time (because screw the warhammer power of hiding yourself elsewhere in his ginormous titan body). There is no master plan as we all expected, and in the end he just acts all yandere in the paths with Armin and that’s it... They massacared his entire character as well. Many fan theories created a better ending with his character. Him being reincarnated as Historia’s baby would be so much better. For him to still keep on seeking and to strive for power. It has always been his motive. It’s his personality from the start until chapter 138. Even if things are okay, to keep on going and to seek that adventure, but then.. He’s so weak and directionless suddenly.. It’s so weird... This is not Aaron at all???
Using Aaron for him this entire post, because I don’t want others to invade our tags... :)))
Historia’s baby 
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The only panel we got from Historia’s child was this. Just a normal kid, normal life... Why did Isayama put so much effort in highlighting Historia’s pregnancy if it was nothing too spectacular anyway? It seemed he had major plans for this kid and for their development too??? It’s again, big plans, big developments, big relationship dynamic, but all  got thrown out of the window... 
Don’t read the next sentence if you are a minor :’) 
It’s like almost ejaculating, but stopping right before it and repeating that every single Arc.
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My energy when writing about this chapter is the same as Nostalgia Critic and his hatred for atla the live action
In Conclusion...
I know us fans should not be deciding on how this story should end, because this is Isayama’s story after all, but I truly wished for him to wrap up things much more rounded. There are so many unanswered questions... Again, I think for the sake of being done with this manga, he rushed all of it. He’s become a millionaire from this story and now his pockets are jammed full, I guess he doesn’t need to put in any effort anymore, right? Perhaps a controversial opinion, but I really wished he cared for his fans a little bit more with this last chapter by giving some answers that make sense at least. It’s his fans who gave him this platform and the opportunity to tell his story and for him to at least give in a bit of effort especially in the last chapter is the least he can do. Rivamika being canon or not, he truly rushed it without thinking much about the entire story line. He expanded it so much, he didn’t know how to bind it all together.
Even after all this, I’ll still ship them in the headcanon type of way. I do give credit to Isayama for giving us a template for such a beautiful dynamic between Levi and Mikasa. He decides to waste it, but that doesn’t mean we have to.  I want to thank all the people with amazing writing skills, the ones who give us beautiful art like @carmenlee @phit chan @vialesana​ and many more. I want to remind all of you that we can create something beautiful of our own and we don’t neccesarily need canon lore for that. The art I’ve seen, the fanfictions I’ve read have touched me deeper than Isayama ever could at times.The Mikasa in our mind is appreciate of Levi, is mature, classy and has a strong will for herself. They spend their remaining days together peacefully. Keep writing, keep drawing, stay creative. 
I love you all so so much, I’ve only been publicly active since March, but thank you Rivamika fandom for giving me so much joy as a lurker these past 7 years <3
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lilyharvord · 2 years
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Do you in red queen univeres is like harry potter. The silvers are like the pureblood family. Mare is a newblood like being a muggles born witch and Julian is more like Dumbledor or the Weasley what do you think?
I'm gonna say the universe itself does seem to lend itself to those categories! Or sub-catagories! It also very easily lends itself to a Hogwarts AU! PREPARE FOR AN AU UNDER THE READ MORE
I mean, Mare seeing her favorite big brother Shade receive a super pretty envelope from this strange school saying he is a wizard and is being offered a position in that school? Going to Diagon Alley with her family and Shade picking out a owl, and old faded robes cause he family really can't afford anything else. Then her hugging him tightly as he has one foot on this strange train and one foot on the strange platform that they had to run through a brick wall to get to?! Holding his hand through the window and running along side the train as he promises to write her every week before she runs out of platform and has to stop as the train pulls away and he is waving and smiling wildly at her. Her little hand slowly falling from her wave to be by her side and she wishes desperately to be on that train with him? ONLY TO RECEIVE HER VERY OWN PRETTY LETTER THE NEXT SUMMER? She gets to do the whole process! And she has all these fantasies about what it will be like based on the letters Shade sent her all last year. She wants an owl, or a salamander, or something like that. And she want to play the strange quidditch game he mentions. She wants to run up and down staircases that change. When she gets on the train with him, she practically pulling out of her mom's arms, and almost forgets to hug a very upset Gisa goodbye.
On the train, Shade tells her all the details, introduces her to his friends: ketha (a second year like him), Ada (a sixth year), and Farley (a second year that Mare is incredibly intimidated by until she sees Shade heart eyeing her every two seconds).
They tell her about the houses. Shade is more than proud to be sorted into Hufflepuff even though Farley teases him about it and Ada only smiles at the whole thing. But they all get quiet about Slytherin. It's not a house you want to be in, Shade says quietly. Mare doesn't quite understand. Cunning? what's so bad about being that? Smart and quick witted? Hell, there's nothing wrong with it.
Then she meets them. The Slytherins. And she sees why she shouldn't be a part of that House. But then she meets the strange, dark haired, blue eyed boy at the back of the group with her, who tries to sit in a boat alone until Mare clambers in behind him, cursing the fact that her socks got wet and they're going to be gross and her shoes will squelch while she walks. He seems a little uncomfortable around her big personality until she introduces herself, and he smiles and shakes her hand, quietly introducing himself as Maven. Nothing more. Mare doesn't mind, loads of people don't give their last names.
Then she's in the Great Hall, underneath the Sorting Hat, Shade smiling at her like a fiend from the Hufflepuff table while Maven is already sitting at the Slytherin one, slouched and looking just a bit upset. (It's not what you think y'all. it's because CAL's a Gryfindor, and their dad was too and he still wants to get his fathers love, and he pretty much just CEMENTED the fact that he won't get it now.) Mare sees him, and the Sorting Hat huffs and says, making friends already? Mare frowns and then thinks back it: he's lonely. And the hat laughs before saying: loyal then, hufflepuff might do you well. She makes a face and it laughs once again when she thinks: I can do better than that. And it seems to nod in understanding before standing upright and announcing SLYTHERIN. Maven sits up taller as Mare leaps down from the stool and runs to him with a big, shit eating grin on her face. Shade goes a little pale in the face but smiles at her nonetheless. It's his baby sister, and if she's happy, he is too.
She's very happy. Slytherin isn't all that bad. Maven's her friend and he's a very good one. He's smart as a tack, and knows all these neat tricks to get through work. But its when they go out to fly on the brooms where they differ finally. Maven is... not a fan of being off the ground. Mare... she could live up there. She tries to get him interested but he jut won't have it, preferring to bury his nose in books and study. (Mare wonders why he wasn't sorted into Ravenclaw like Ada, but she shrugs it off).
It's one day when they're all out walking and that girl Evangeline starts teasing some kid and throws his whatever in the air that things finally get interesting for Mare. In a very impressive showing of skill, she catches this tiny object while flying. IMMEDIATELY, the captain of the Slytherin team wants her as his Seeker. Its UNHEARD OF everyone argues. NO FIRST YEARS allowed! But it's vetoed, and Mare is allowed to play. Shade is more than proud, puffing out his chest, and forcing her to walk around with him so he can introduce her to his class and everyone as the youngest Seeker in years.
It's after she is sneaking out of the Gryffindor tower one night, having stayed to talk with Shade and Farley who is finally losing some of her Ice Queen exterior and even cracked a smile at one of Mare's jokes, that she almost gets in trouble. She is sprinting down the stairs of the tower when she runs smack into someone so they both end up tumbling down the stairs and hitting the back of the Fat Lady's portrait when they land. She stumbles over apologies, trying to grab her things in the dark (and pocketing one or two of his by accident), when she looks up. She's seen him before, she know she has, but can't remember from where. Plus, it's a little dark and she can't see him all that clearly. He's sitting there, tie undone, and shirt all messed up from falling, and rubbing the back of his head where it hit the back of the portrait when he looks at her. HE knows her. This the girl who is the youngest Seeker in years! They blink at each other, and she tries to take off, but he grabs her wrist, keeping ahold of her as he says: Thief! when he realizes she grabbed a few of his things. She looks down at the mess of things in her arms, and then frowns at him before saying, No! These are my things! he pulls out his wand and book from her hands and she's like: okay, well, those aren't mine, but whatever. And he smiles at her as he stands and she's suddenly craning her neck to look up at him, and LORD ABOVE what did he eat as a child?! She squints up at him, still trying to place him when he shifts his things to his other arm and holds out a hand for her to shake. She looks at it, and then takes it slowly. His grip is so warm and comforting, but not sweaty like some of the other boys her age. He shakes her hand and introduces himself as Cal, and THEN Mare knows who he is. This is Maven's brother. The older one, the perfect spitting image of his father who is the "Perfect Son." Maven always sneers just slightly when he says that, and now that she has met this Cal, she knows Maven is right. Turning up her nose at him, she spins on her heel and leaves, completely uninterested.
Okay she lied, she was a little more interested than she let on. She sees him EVERYWHERE after that. He raises his brows at her in the Great Hall, and even smiled and said good morning Mare when she walked by with Maven to Charms one day. After that day, Maven gets really sullen, and tells her that she shouldn't talk to him, that he's trouble. He's a third year, in line to be Prefect and Headboy at some point. She doesn't want to get mixed up with wet blanket like that. She agrees, but something about him, his eyes, the gentle smile, and way he'd looked at her the first time he saw her makes her heart do a little jig every time she thinks about him.
Before she knows it, its the first Quidditch match, and she's set to play. She steps out in her beautiful green and black uniform, and while she's in the tunnel adjusting the straps on her wrist guard with her teeth, someone laughs behind her and says: there is a better way to do that. She looks up, the laces half in her mouth, and a tiny bit of drool running down her chin to see Cal leaning against his broom. Of course he plays Quidditch, she thinks with a scowl. What perfect son wouldn't? He takes her wrist though and ties the guard gently, pulling the laces perfectly through the loops. Maven tried to help her with it this morning but gave up when he couldn't do it. Her face burns with embarrassment but he doesn't notice, or at least, he pretends not to notice. When he finished both wrist guards, he shoulders his broom and with a wink says, "eyes up and head up, dont want to take a Blunger to face on your first day." He strolls away after that, and Mare stands there, watching his shoulders as he leaves. How does a thirteen year old boy manage to look like that?! Shaking it off she steps on the pitch but... that's all she remembers. She takes a nasty blunger to side of the head and falls to the pitch floor. When she wakes up, the entire Slytherin team is around her and so is half the Gryfinddor team, Farley is grimacing as she takes in the situation, and Cal is leaning over her, shielding her from the son. She frowns up at him before saying, "you didn't say they moved that fast." He snorts to hide a laugh as the medics take her off the pitch. Good news? She learns later in the Infirmary, they won! When she went down, Cal, the Keeper moved as if to go to her and they were able to put the Quaffle in to get the final point! Her captain claps her on the back, and she tries not to puke when the movement jars her head.
The year ends uneventfully, and she waves goodbye to Maven as she disembarks and he leaves with Cal. A woman with matching icy blue eyes and stark, ash blonde hair frowns at her as Maven smiles and waves his own goodbye. She pointedly ignores Cal's title wave goodbye.
The next year is much of the same but there is a... current in the air, a charge that wasn't there before. Something is happening, something dark in the world. Shade and Farley go to Hogsmead and talk about it, but Mare can't go yet. She sits in a hidden alcove of the Astronomy tower, watching the world outside with her books open before her. Maven is quieter this year, but there is a strange new confidence and glint in his eye. It worries her. He is not the boy she waved goodbye to at the beginning of the summer.
One day while studying, she hears footsteps and looks up to see Cal pausing along side her. Her stomach flip flops when she sees him. The summer did wonders for him. Somehow, he is more attractive. She didn't even realize that was possible. And she REFUSED to admit that she thought about him a few times... well more than a few times... over the break. He smiles at her and before she knows it, she's leaning toward him to talk. She asks why he's not at Hogsmead and he grimaces before saying he is struggling with Diviniation and has to take an extra class on it every week. She laughs, and the smile he gives her when she does laugh turns her stomach to molten lava. He helps her out of the windowsill and they walk to the Great Hall together. Maven intercepts them before then, his eyes narrowing and darkening when Cal waves goodbye and heads on his way. Mare nudges Maven with her shoulder and teases him saying: are you worried I might like him more than you? Maven glowers at her, and she softens before taking his hand and promising him that Cal is "a complete and utter moron, who she could never like." It seems to relax him, but not completely. Again, Mare worries. He was never concerned about Cal or any of this before.
The year works that way though. She slowly get closer to Cal. They have this strange unspoken agreement to meet at HER windowsill once a week and then walk along the ground by the lake. One day, in the winter, she forgets a thick enough coat, and is shivering in her sweater until he shrugs off his cloak and drapes it around her shoulders. She blinks in surprise, before smiling and thanking him. It's far too big on her and drags on the ground a bit, but its warm and it smells like him. Which she is terrified to realize she kind of likes.
She starts spending time in the Gryffindor tower too, getting closer with Shade's friends, and sometimes, Cal is there too. He's not really a staple (he and Farley don't really get along, something about her calling him a Pure Blooded Hypocrite), but Mare finds she likes when he is around.
That summer is terrible. Maven doesn't write her as much as he promised. And the world is getting Dark™️. There are strange disappearances on the TV. Things are getting weird. Shade gets secret letters from Farley that he hides from her. When they go back to Hogwarts, things are... different. There are guards, there weren't Guards before. Maven looks more gaunt and haunted. Even Cal doesn't seem as cheery anymore. They're walks around the lake go from once to twice to three times a week. He tells her about his side of the Wizarding World, and she learns about a group that is known as the Death Eaters (who serve a mysterious Dark One that wants to eliminate the muggle population and the mud bloods). Mare frowns when he says that word. He says it quietly, like its something bad. She's not sure why, it's a word. When she asks Farley about it, her friend's face hardens and she tells her it's a nasty term that Pure Bloods use to describe the people like them. The ones who come from non magic families.
She finds solace in Quidditch, she even goes out when Cal offers to show her a few tricks, and that time... it is strangely magical. She finally gets to go to Hogsmead, and spend time with Shade and Farley there. They have a new little group, a taller fifth year named Tristan is added, Ada is with them, Ketha, and a couple of others. Shade tells her to go off and find something to do one time and she ends up spying on them. When she does, she overhears them talking about the Dark One, that they are back and that is the reason so many Muggles are dying and disappearing strangely. That Hogwarts might not be safe anymore. She confronts Cal about it one day, and he stops dead in the snow, spins on her and says never to talk about it. That the Dark One is dead, has been dead for year and that she should never mention them. She is taken aback, he's never seemed so concerned to desperate before. So she drops it. But things get worse over christmas break.
When she returns, Maven is almost cold with her. She tries to tease him like she used to, but he just isn't having it. She clings tighter to him, worried that things are not going well at home. She knows his mother isn't great, knows his father is an asshole. She can't understand how two people like that managed to make someone like Maven, and someone like Cal. But she tries her best to be a friend for Maven. She can't help but get closer with Cal. Something about him draws her in, and keeps her.
One day at Hogsmead, she runs into him (literally, again). She slips on the ice and he catches her, his hands grabbing her hips and pulling her close so she has to grab the front of his coat and cloak to keep herself upright too. They look at each other for a long time, confused and full of butterflies before she spots Maven at the other end of the bridge. She was supposed to meet him at the sweet shop but was running late. His eyes narrow ever so slightly at what he sees, and Mare pulls away from Cal glaring at him and adjusting her hair when he blinks in confusion. She turns on her heel and leaves without a word, taking Maven's hand in her own as she passes him and dragging him along.
That summer, something changes fundamentally in the world. The world actually gets even Darker. Shade gets more worried, and Farley starts showing up at thier house. Mare know they are seeing each other. But she keeps it to herself. When they go back to Hogwarts... there are Guards on the train. She walks down the hallway and runs into Cal on his way to his compartment. The train rocks as she is trying to pass him and she ends up in his arms again. She's fifteen, and he's seventeen, old for a sixth year. But in his Prefect uniform, he looks quiet attractive, and somehow he got MORE attractive over the summer. The flutters that had once been nothing but tummy flutters when she was elven/twelve are now full blown butterflies in her stomach. She would never admit it, but she had a dream about him over the summer. About his hands on her hips and the stone wall of the Gryffindor common room rubbing against her back as she pinned her to it. She doesn't pull herself out of his arms right now though, there is something comforting about being in his embrace right now, when the world seems to slowly falling apart around them. He lets her go, a falsh of something in his eyes before he smiles at her and says, safe travels.
When they get to Hogwarts, she knows there is something wrong with Maven. He looks like a corpse, his eyes are dark and his features are sharper than usual. She tries to get him to smile for her, but he can't seem to muster much. So one day, out of desperation, she kisses him. He melts finally, and she melts with him, burning like Icarus when he got to close to the sun. They become... a thing for lack of a better term. He clings tightly to her, pulls her away from Farley and Shade and her friends, pointedly makes sure she doesn't spend time with Cal to the point where he actually seeks her out one day, and Maven jeers at him until he leaves. It scares her, he was never hostile, never a person like this. When she talks to him about it, he raves about things she doesn't understand. An In fact, he seems almost angry with her. She can't understand, she tries to get it out of him halfway through the fall, and he turns around and calls her a nasty Mudblood, jeering at her about the fact that is lucky he even considers her a friend. It breaks her heart, shatters it into a thousand pieces. She didn't kiss him just because it might make him feel better. She kissed him because she wanted to, because she thought it felt right (she also did it because a secret part of her hoped that kissing him would make the dreams about Cal stop.)
She stops hanging around him, the other kids like him and the other Slytherins embrace him instead, folding him into their group, while she starts to gravitate to Shade and Farley again.
they go home for Christmas, and the world tilts completely on its access. There is horrible accident that kills a number of families, and Shade immediately packs a backpack that night to go see Farley. Mare forces him to take her with him. When they get to Farley's, everyone is there, all the people Shade has been friends with. She learns they are forming a group, the Scarlet Guard, to defend themselves. The Dark One is coming back, and they will be ready.
When they return in the spring, the teacher for Defense Against the Dark Arts does not prepare them right. Mare feels like a child being handed a pair of children scissors to solve a grown up problem. She talks to Shade about it, and the group agrees. They need training. It's then that Mare does what cements her fate with Maven. She seeks out Cal. He is not looking too great either, there is something haunting his face and when she finally walks up to him one morning on the lawn near the lake, he looks at her suspiciously. She doesn't know why but she ends up curled against his side, sobbing. He's taken aback at first, and then soften, wrapping an arm around her while she tells him everything. With a tight jaw, and a nod, he agrees to help them training.
They form a secret group, and they start training. It's then that Mare starts to realize that perhaps she likes Cal more than she lets on. he's a good teacher, a very good one, and whenever he holds her hand and guides her wrist through a complex spell movement, she feels her face heat up. He's a sixth year, seventeen and on the cusp of greatness it seems. His OWLs were outstanding, he is set on the path she knows he wants. They train together privately. On a nondescript day like any other, she stays after to talk to him, and when she does, he kisses her. It turns her into a pool of liquid mercury, and when he breaks it off and gently caresses her cheek with his thumb she knows she is doomed.
They leave for the summer, and she writes him daily. He writes back, telling her about things happening at home. There are issues, his father is stressed, his step mother is being cagey, and Maven... he's not himself. She worries, Shade is a sixth year and she's just a fifth year, but the world feels like it is resting on their shoulders.
When they come back to school in the fall, Maven confronts her. He found the letters she wrote to Cal. He accuses her of a number of things she is horrified by. Cal steps in to push him back, and in a horrible moment, Maven draws his wand and puts to Cal's throat. The brothers stand like that for a moment, and Mare with her hand on her wand fears who she will have to point her own wand at. But Maven drops the wand, and that is that when he storms off.
The Scarlet Guard grows in number. And then it happens right before they leave for Winter Break. The earth shattering, horrible truth. The Dark One returns, and no where is safe. Hogwarts is under attack before anyone knows what is happening. Mare is fighting through the halls, throwing out hexes and charms she never thought she would have to use. She battles her way to Cal, who takes her hand and pulls her close. The Aurors arrive but they are not enough. Shade, Farley, Mare and Cal storm the upper tower. Cal makes them stay below in the hidden crawl space because Maven is up there and he can hear his father. When he gets up there, it is not what he thinks. Mare and Farley and Shade watch from below in horror as Elara uses the Imperius Curse to actually turn Cal on his father so he kills him. When that happens, the truth is revealed. Elara is the Dark One, or the new chosen Dark One among the Death Eaters. Mare storms up the steps before Elara can kill Cal, using the one spell she knows might end the duel. But Maven steps in and they end up dueling. With tears steaming down her cheeks, she tries to fight him off. But he is not fighting to stun her, he is fighting to kill her, to put her out of commission. She is disarmed, and in a horrible moment, thinks he will kill her. Elara is cooing at him to do it, to punish her for loving his brother instead of him. She pleads with him silently, begging him with her eyes not to. His lips twist as he struggles with the decision. It's too long, Shade and Farley get up the steps and force Elara and Maven to appirate away.
The world cracks open like an egg as war spills out after that.
HOLY SHIT THAT WAS LONG. ANYWAY, ENJOY EVERYONE. I'm not going back and rereading this so whatever you see is what you get XD
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fizzysquish · 4 years
Note
I'd really like to hear about your opinion on the ahit fandom if youre ok with sharing? love your writing by the way!!
Oh wow I actually didn't expect anyone to wanna know yifhfkhck
And thank you!
Alright this is.. Gonna be long and most likely have some spelling errors every now and then but bear with me.
Tw- talk of pedophilia, swear words
Tldr at the very bottom
The ahit fandom..
...sucks
But also doesnt? Its kind of hard to explain. In general, if you just glance at the fandom it will either come across as pure or as a shit show. This fandom has some serious problems.
This fandom has a lot of drama happy people in it. Im not going to name names or anything, cause there's no point, but it does. A single scroll through the tags will tell you that much. And this isnt me saying 'people can't have opinions' or what have you. What im saying is that there are people in this fandom who live just to stir up drama and make others angry.
Or, in a lot of cases, instead of just saying a persons opinion, they'll swear up a storm and say they hate certain people or call certain types of fans 'the problem with the fandom' and like.. That just makes you sound like an asshole honestly. And it hurts people, too.
(And nobody can tell me it doesn't. Ive had to reassure too many venting and upset friends because of it. It hurts people.)
Also, because you know I have to mention this and it fits perfectly after this first paragraph- subcon. Snatcher.
I legitimately do not understand why some people hate snatcher so much. And I also cannot understand why some people will specifically target snatcher fans at times.
Snatcher is a big comfort character for a lot of people. Wether its for personal reasons (ex- mine is because of my own past dealing with abuse and trauma), or if its just because they make someone happy.
Snatcher is a comfort character, and the whole story surrounding subcon is so so interesting and fun to explore? And so what if people enjoy it? I can understand that it can get frustrating seeing so much of it, especially if you like something else, but that is no reason to target snatcher fans (or.. Any fans in general) and/or make people feel bad for having fun.
Fuck, thats how you make people leave the fandom entirely. I understand it can get frustrating, but just.. Try to be nicer? Try not to make people feel bad for having fun? Please?
And before anyone tells me "it's not about that!", i want to point out that I often see posts like "don't let the snatcher fans see this-" and other things along that.
If you want me to believe its not about that, prove it. Cause as far as i can tell, it certainly is.
(Also as a note- who cares is someones thirsty??? Like
Just block them and avoid if it bugs you so much?? It's not that hard dude)
-THIS PARAGRAPH MENTIONS PEDOPHILLIA, SKIP IF NEEDED-
Another serious thing to mention is the pedophilia in this fandom. Feel free to skip this part  if it makes you uncomfortable, but its something i need to talk about.
There are pedophiles in this fandom. Ive seen the art and the fics (no matter how many times i scrub my eyes, because its disgusting and horrible and just- eugh-). There are pedophiles here and its easy to come across them because they just.. Aren't afraid to post in main tags. People follow them. People support them. Granted, not everyone, and generally most people know to avoid em, but they're still there. They havent been kicked out or ostracized. And it disgusts me.
I know this whole paragraph could be argued that "that doesn't represent the fandom!" Or whatever but.. This is a younger audiences welcome game guys. Its advertised as 'the cutest 3d platformer!'. Kids can and do play this game.
There is pedophilia in this fandom, and i feel its important to mention.
-END OF PARAGRAPH-
Also, some people in this fandom just.. Suck. Plain and simple. Some people in this fandom are just genuine assholes. And said asshole just like harassing others and causing problems. There's a literal shit ton of drama and problems with this fandom, and honestly it's.. So dumb??
This is literally just a video game and people are just having fun. If there's a problem, treat it like a grown up and either ask the causes to stop and why, or block and move on. Simple.
Now lets move onto the good parts of this fandom, yeah?
First of all- there are some serious sweethearts and amazing people in this fandom. While there are some that suck, there are more that are actually just here for a good time and to make good content.
Ive met some of the nicest people ivs ever known thanks go this fandom. Ive created friends who I seriously consider family. And most people ive talked with or even just ran across have been pretty cool.
This fandom is also generally very welcoming to new people (minus the assholes), ive noticed. Some people get into it really easily just because eveyones generally friendly and supportive. Which is always great!
Also, the fanworks people in this fandom create. Can i just talk about how fucking talented people are??? Its pretty amazing to see how people create things for this fandom.
People will take the story that gears for breakfast showed and they'll run with it, and create these amazing au’s and stories and 'what ifs' from it. Its just.. So amazing to watch people use what we've been given just weaved it into something.
(And this isnt even going over the mods and the stories those create, which always amaze me.)
So with all that laid out, do i think the fandom good or bad?
...i think its both.
The fandom itself has some serious problems in it. It gets unnecessary drama nearly every other month or so for no reason. There are some truly disgusting people and some absolute assholes, but the majority of people are actually pleasant, fun to be around, and welcoming. As long as you be careful of who you follow and use critical thinking skills, its not so bad.
Im not going to lie to someone and say it's all honkey dory. In this fandom, you will inevitably interact with either a creep, an asshole, or both at some point. There is a likely chance that you will have your feelings hurt in some way in this fandom. Ive see it, ive heard about it, ive experienced it.
All that being said, if you curate your viewing, follow people that seem/are cool, and use the block feature (don't. Debate it, if youre unsure about someone just block em)... Its a very fun fandom filled with both heartfelt creations and memes, and has plenty of potential new friends.
So its both good and bad, yeah.
Tldr-
Fandom has lotsa issues but overall is fun, just make sure curate your experience for yourself and dont let what drama pops up or what assholes say get to you.
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kingjasnah · 4 years
Note
Is there the full list of brandersons favourite games reposted somewhere?
i dont think so? or not that ive seen. u can literally just sign up for the newsletter on his website but screw it ill just post them for u. it sure was a TRIP scrolling past these to get to the interlude though. undertale is on this list.....im shakign at the thought that adolin was based off ff10 tidus but i cant get it out of my head now
#10: Katamari Damaci
I love things that make me look at the world in a new way. Katamari did this in spades. It is an imaginative, bizarre vision with unique gameplay. It is like nothing else in the world and I love it for all its strangeness and occasional lack of gameplay polish.
I was transfixed the first time I played it, and have looked forward to it being remade and rereleased on multiple different consoles. I love the cute—and somehow creepy at the same time—storyline. It feels like a fever dream more than a game sometimes, and is probably the closest I’ll ever get to understanding what it’s like to do drugs.
#9: Undertale
This is an oddball on this list because I think it’s the only game that is not a franchise from a major studio—but is instead an indie game, which I believe was originally funded on Kickstarter.I loved how this felt like a novel as much as a game. It was one person’s vision; a single story told really well, with a huge amount of personality. The humor was just my kind of wonderful/terrible, and I was instantly enamored with the characters.That probably would have been enough, but it is a nice deconstruction of video games as a medium—and has not one, but multiple innovative gameplay mechanics. Together, the package left me enamored. This is a work of genius that I feel everyone should at least try, even if it ends up not being for them.
#8: Fallout: New Vegas
I have played all of the core Fallout games, and I was one of the (it seems few) who was really excited when it moved from turn-based tactics to first-person shooter. While Fallout 3 was good, it didn’t have the charm of the first two.New Vegas delivered on everything I was hoping to see. The charm was back, the writing sharp, the quests imaginative. The gameplay was engaging and branched in a variety of directions, the gunplay was solid, and the atmosphere immersive. I of course love the first two games in the series—but New Vegas combines everything I like in gaming into one package. (As a note, I own the Outer Worlds, and am looking forward to digging into it. Consider this item on the list a recommendation of other Obsidian games—like Knights of the Old Republic Two—regardless of genre, as I’ve found them universally to be superior to their contemporaries.)
#7 Super Mario World
When I was eleven, I flew (alone, which was very exciting to me) from Nebraska to visit my uncle Devon in Salt Lake City. Before I left, my father gave me $200 and told me to pay for my own meals while on the trip—but of course, my uncle didn’t allow this. At the end of the trip, I tried to give him the money, which he wouldn’t take.I mentioned my dad would take the money back when I got home, but that was okay. Well, my uncle would have none of that, and drove me to the local mall and made me spend it on a Nintendo Entertainment System. (This uncle, you might guess, is an awesome human being.)Since that day of first plugging it in and experiencing Mario for the first time, I was hooked. This is the only platformer on the list, as I don’t love those. But one makes an exception for Mario. There’s just so much polish, so much elegance to the control schemes, that even a guy who prefers an FPS or an RPG like me has to admit these are great games. I picked World as my favorite as it’s the one I’ve gone back to and played the most.
#7: The Curse of Monkey Island (Monkey Island 3)
I kind of miss the golden age of adventure gaming, and I don’t know that anyone ever got it as right as they did with this game. It is the pinnacle of the genre, in my opinion—no offense to Grim Fandango fans.This game came out right before gaming’s awkward teenage phase where everything moved to 3-d polygons. For a while after, games looked pretty bad, though they could do more because of the swap. But if you want to go see what life was like before that change, play Monkey Island 3. Composed of beautiful art pieces that look like cells from Disney movies, with streamlined controls (the genre had come a long way from “Get yon torch”) and fantastic voice acting, this game still plays really well.This is one of the few games I’ve been able to get my non-gamer wife to play through with me, and it worked really well as a co-op game with the two of us trying to talk through problems. It’s a lovingly crafted time capsule of a previous era of gaming, and if you missed it, it’s really worth trying all these years later. (The first and second games hold up surprisingly well too, as a note, particularly with the redone art that came out a decade or so ago.)Also, again, this one has my kind of humor.
#6: Breath of the Wild
I never thought a Zelda game would unseat A Link to the Past as my favorite Zelda, but Breath of the Wild managed it. It combined the magic of classic gameplay with modern design aesthetic, and I loved this game.There’s not a lot to say about it that others haven’t said before, but I particularly liked how it took the elements of the previous games in the series (giving you specific tools to beat specific challenges) and let you have them all at once. I like how the dungeons became little mini puzzles to beat, instead of (sometimes seemingly endless) slogs to get through. I liked the exploration, the fluidity of the controls, and the use of a non-linear narrative in flashbacks. It’s worth buying a Switch just to play this one and Mario—but in case you want, you can also play Dark Souls on Switch... (That’s foreshadowing.)
#5: Halo 2
Telling stories about Halo Two on stream is what made me think of writing this list.I’m sometimes surprised that this game isn’t talked about as much as I think it should be. Granted, the franchise is very popular—but people tend to love either Reach or games 1 or 3 more than two. Two, however, is the only one I ever wanted to replay—and I’ve done so three or four times at this point. (It’s also the only one I ever beat on Legendary.)It’s made me think on why I love this one, while so many others seem to just consider it one of many in a strong—but in many ways unexceptional—series of games. I think part of this is because I focus primarily on the single-player aspects of a game (which is why there aren’t any MMOs on this list.) Others prefer Halo games with more balanced/polished multiplayer. But I like to game by myself, and don’t really look for a multiplayer experience. (Though this is changing as I game with my sons more and more.)I really like good writing—which I suppose you’d expect. But in games, I specifically prefer writing that enhances the style of game I’m playing. Just dumping a bunch of story on me isn’t enough; it has to be suited to the gameplay and the feel of the game. In that context, I’ve rarely encountered writing as good as Halo 2. From the opening—with the intercutting and juxtaposition of the two narratives—to the quotes barked out by the marines, the writing in this game is great. It stands out starkly against other Halo games, to the point that I wonder what the difference is.Yes, Halo Two is a bombastic hero fantasy about a super soldier stomping aliens. But it has subtle, yet powerful worldbuilding sprinkled all through it—and the music...it does things with the story that I envy. It’s kind of cheating that games and films get to have powerful scores to help with mood.The guns in Two feel so much better than Halo One, and the vehicles drive far better. The only complaint I have is that it’s only half a story—as in, Halo 2 and 3 seem like they were one game broken in two pieces. And while 3 is good (and Reach does something different, which I approve of in general) neither did it for me the way Two did, and continues to do.
#3: Final Fantasy X
You probably knew Final Fantasy was coming. People often ask if the way these games handle magic was an influence upon me. All I can say is that I’ve played them since the first one, and so they’re bound to have had an influence.On one hand, these games are really strange. I mean, I don’t think we gamers stop quite often enough to note how downright bizarre this series gets. Final Fantasy doesn’t always make the most sense—but the games are always ambitious.Ten is my favorite for a couple of reasons. I felt like the worldbuilding was among the strongest, and I really connected with the characters. That’s strange, because this is one of the FF games without an angst-filled teen as the protagonist. Instead, it has a kind of stable happy-go-lucky jock as the protagonist.But that’s what I needed, right then. A game that didn’t give me the same old protagonist, but instead gave me someone new and showed me I could bond to them just as well. Ten was the first with full voice acting, and that jump added a lot for me. It has my favorite music of the series, and all together is what I consider the perfect final fantasy game. (Though admittedly, I find it more and more difficult to get into turn-based battle mechanics as I grow older.)
#2: Bloodborne
Those who follow my streams, or who read other interviews I’ve done, probably expected this series to be at or near the top. The question wasn’t whether Souls would be here, but which one to pick as my favorite.I went with Bloodborne, though it could have been any of them. (Even Dark Souls 2—which I really like, despite its reputation in the fandom.) I’ve been following FromSoftware’s games since the King’s Field games, and Demon’s Souls was a huge triumph—with the director Hidetaka Miyazaki deserving much of the praise for its design, and Dark Souls (which is really just a more polished version of Demon’s Souls).As I am a fan of cosmic horror, Bloodborne is probably my favorite overall. It really hit the mix of cosmic and gothic horror perfectly. It forced me to change up my gameplay from the other Souls games, and I loved the beautiful visuals.I am a fan of hard games—but I like hard games that are what I consider “fair.” (For example, I don’t love those impossible fan-made Mario levels, or many of the super-crazy “bullet hell”-style games.) Dark Souls is a different kind of hard. Difficult like a stern instructor, expecting you to learn—but giving you the tools to do so. It presents a challenge, rather than being hard just to be hard.If I have a problem with Final Fantasy, it’s that the games sometimes feel like the gameplay is an afterthought to telling the story. But in the Souls games, story and gameplay are intermixed in a way I’d never seen done before. You have to construct the story like an archeologist, using dialogue and lore from descriptions of in-game objects. I find this fascinating; the series tells stories in a way a book never could. I’m always glad when a game series can show off the specific strengths of the medium.In fact, this series would be #1 except for the little fact that I have way too much time on Steam logged playing...
#1: Civilization VI
This series had to take #1 by sheer weight of gameplay time. I discovered the first on a friend’s computer in the dorms my freshman year—and I can still remember the feeling of the birds chirping outside, realizing I’d been playing all night and really should get back to my own dorm room.That still happens, and has happened, with every game in the series. I have a lot of thoughts on this series, many of them granular and too specific for this list. (Like, it’s obvious AI technology isn’t up to the task of playing a game this complex—so could we instead get a roguelike set of modifiers, game modes, etc. to liven up the games, rather than just having a difficulty slider that changes a few simple aspects of the game?)I’ll try not to rant, because I really do love this game series. A lot of people consider IV to be the pinnacle of the series, but after V unstacked units—and VI unstacked cities—there was no way I could ever go back. If for some reason, you’ve never played this grand patriarch of the 4X game genre, it’s about starting with a single stone-age settler who can found a city—then playing through eras of a civilization, growing your empire, to try to eventually get offworld with a space program. (Or, if you prefer, conquering the world.)It’s a load of fun in the way I like to have fun, and I feel like the series has only gotten better over the years. My hat is off to the developers, who keep reinventing the series, rather than making the exact same game over and over.Now, about that request for difficulty modes...
there are runner ups but for the sake of anyone whos on mobile and cant get past a read more (first of all omg im SO sorry) ill refrain. anyway he thought WHAT loz game was the best before botw?
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mysaldate · 4 years
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(UM seduction methods anon here) Im in awe over how much you write for so many character, every day! Do you have any hc on how they live? (where they live? living conditions?) BUT please dont push yourself or anything either!
Thank you so much for worrying about me! I’m simply trying to do my very best for all of you! And thank you also for such wonderful and original requests!
The living conditions of the Upper Moons headcanons
Daki&Gyuutaro
This one will be short since we know quite a lot about them. They’ve lived in the red lights district for their whole lives. In the streets and usually with little more than just their clothes on but they had each other.
They stayed in even after they became a demons. No surprise, there’s plenty of food and nobody will really care if a couple girls disappears.
They don’t have separate rooms of course. These two are literally inseparable so of course they wouldn’t bother with something like that. There’s nobody to tease them about it either since people are not aware of there even being two of them and as for their fellow demons, those just don’t care. Except maybe for Douma but he wouldn’t tease them about it.
We got to see their room so there’s not much to be said about the decorations either. Daki is a stylish girl and she likes to show it off even in the way she sets up their room – even if nobody much gets to see it.
Kaigaku
He never really had much of a home per say. He became an orphan at a young age (if he wasn’t abandoned as a baby already) and then was chased out of Gyomei’s temple as well. Jigoro took him in but unfortunately enough, that relationship didn’t really work out either. Strangely enough, he felt most at home when he was outside, travelling from one mission to another.
After he became a demon, he stayed with Kokushibou for a short period of time but that was just before Muzan approved of his existence. After that, he had to find his own territory – which wasn’t really too hard anyway. He picked a run-down old house as his shelter from the sun for the day but he didn’t really care much how it looked, at least not at first.
It’s not that he wouldn’t like company but there’s not really anyone to share his place with. Humans wouldn’t hang out with him, other demons literally can’t. Other Upper Moons won’t.
He first didn’t care at all how the place looked but after some time, he decided that since he didn’t have anything to do during the day anyway, he could at least try to decorate the place a bit. So while the sun is up, he does little things inside, like sweeping the floors or painting the walls. He even learnt to sew to make curtains. And at night, when he’s not out hunting, he does other reparations. Even he is surprised by how much fun he can have, giving the place a personal touch.
Gyokko
Being an artist, it’s not unlikely that he lived in an open, arid room before he became a demon. Lots of sunlight too. And occassionally, a companion or two but those never really stuck around for long. His place was filled with various unfinished art pieces.
Now that he’s a demon, he can’t have the luxury of a sunny appartment. His pots, however, work as a little pocket dimension so that’s an upgrade? Of sorts? It doesn’t really have a set shape either, it’s a little bit like Nakime’s Infinity Fortress but shapeless, like the walls are made of water or another liquid and constantly change form.
He lives with plenty of goldfish. The entire place is nearly filled with aquariums of various shapes and forms. You know how people make mazes for hamsters, guinea pigs or even cats? Well, those are nothing when compared to the lengths Gyokko goes to for his fishies. It’s not just glass, coloured or plain, either. Sometimes he would use the nichirin blades or pretty hairpieces of his victims’ to decorate the elaborate fishtanks as well. If a human ever strays in, it’s the last thing they say.
Gyokko LOVES decoration. Aside from his fishtanks, he has numerous statues, paintings and just about everything else you can think of. Both handmade and stolen. For his handmade art, he usually uses bodies or bodyparts of his victims, possibly their blood too. It serves both as an artpiece and a food reserve just in case he ever gets to a position where he’s forced to starve. Surprisingly enough, his pots are great at preserving things. Oh, and let’s not forget about the amount of detail he puts to the exterior of his pots! 
Hantengu
Back when he was a human, he didn’t really have a home, naturally. He couldn’t afford it. And most people wouldn’t let him stay more than one night, chasing him out often with sticks and stones. He had to travel all the time and preferably somewhere far away where the rumors about him didn’t reach yet. Due to this, he becomes restless when he has to spend a long time in one place.
Now, as a demon, he also doesn’t stay in one place all the time. He usually sneaks in a house, kills the family and stays there for a few days before moving on to the next one. Some of his other personalities, namely Sekido and Karaku, find this a little useless and bothersome but they wouldn’t really fight him on it.
Speaking of whom, his other personalities split when they have time to be alone as well, taking care of him and the house. It’s a great way to keep him safe as well since at least one of them is always on guard for possible intruders. They get along... somewhat well. There are the usual conflicts between Sekido and the others. Karaku is careless about their cover, Yoroko likes to make pranks on them and Aizetsu tends to lock himself in his room for hours on end. Poor Sekido is left with the task of housework, making sure they don’t get discovered too soon, acting as the voice of reason... and he still has to go out hunting and stay on guard when it’s his turn.
Yoroko likes decorating stuff and Karaku loves to watch him but their taste is strange to everyone but them. Surprisingly enough, Hantengu as well as Aizetsu both can actually create rather beautiful tapestries and Zohakuten sometimes paints when Sekido is just too done with the three useless dorks.
Nakime
She used to be your typical hikikomori. Nakime spent all her time in her room, with nothing but a pile of books and her biwa. It wasn’t a big room either. While her room did have windows, she prefered them covered and read in the light of an oil lamp. As expected, it wasn’t too good for her eyes...
She lives in the Dimensional Infinity Fortress now. A place she can fully control and knows everything about, one that bends to her will and where she can transport anyone anywhere at any time, just as she wants. The only exception seems to be Muzan who comes and goes as he sees fit (at least until the current arc but y’all already know how I feel about that). It’s not that she minds it, she still knows where and when he enters and leaves and even if she didn’t, it’s not like he would ambush and kill her for no reason (right?).
Despite providing rooms specifically suited for the Upper Moons, she much enjoys her solitude. Even when they’re in and she has to keep an eye on them (I’m sorry, I’ll stop with the puns now), she keeps her distance. Try to annoy her, or even just seek her company, and you will mercilessly get thrown out. An exception, again, is Muzan. He doesn’t live there with  her though and only seeks her out when he has work for her to do.
Decoration of the rooms varies greatly, mostly based on what are they used for. Most of the Fortress is not decorated since Nakime sees no reason to waste time and effort on that. However, there are special parts that deserve special attention. Just as an example, there’s Muzan’s upside-down lab, Douma’s lotus pond, that traditional japanese area Kokushibou first appeared in... And of course, the execution platform that’s now decorated with the red of the Lower Moons’ blood.
Akaza
Again, we have a very good canon idea about his life as a human. First living with his father and then spending some time in the streets, he eventually ended up staying at Keizo’s house, taking care of Koyuki. He had his own room there too but it didn’t really matter because he spent most of his time by Koyuki’s side anyway. Rumor has it he dragged his futon to her once when she was having a nightmare and never moved out until she got all better.
He’s pretty much a street rat as of now, looking for challenges and new foes to fight for the most part. During the days, he usually stays still outside, in dense forests or deep caves. He’s not particularly picky. Sometimes he stays there during the night too, setting up a campfire and waiting for someone to wander close. For some reason, he doesn’t really like cities, especially during the festival season.
So yeah, he lives alone. At least usually he does. It’s not all that rare for Douma to find and bother visit him. He doesn’t want company. Getting attached would make him weak. The more people you care about, the easier it is to take advantage of you.
The only thing he cultivates in his surroundings is his own body. No, I’m not talking about the tattoos, though those certainly are a decoration as well. Rather, it’s his muscles and strength. However, he still prefers to have some manners over raw power, hence why he keeps refusing Douma’s more than generous offers to hunt down some girls together even if that could make him stronger.
Douma
Grew up in the temple in the forest. High up on a mountain overlooking a small town, it’s not a place with the most access to society. But cults are usually like that. When he was about three years old, his father planted two magnolia trees in the courtyard so that the place is a little more lively and the trees can grow tall to provide lots of shade in summer since the sun could be quite annoying. If only he knew...
Loyal as he is, Douma stays at the temple even now. He had it expanded a little and even had a lotus pond build right behind his room so he can calm his thoughts at least a bit after every session. He used to need it more than he does now, especially since he now also has the one made by Nakime that is way better and more spacious.
Canonically, there is at least one temple servant staying with Douma at the temple. But honestly, it wouldn’t be quite like him to satisfy himself with a single person. There’s probably a number of people taking care of the place, both temple servants and maidens. They also serve as a source of entertainment and possibly even as a last-resort snack just in case. There also used to be Kotoha and Inosuke for a short period of time but well...
While he is quite childish and it might sound just like him to go overboard with decorating stuff, that’s not entirely true. Really, the most he has is the skull closet with engraved golden door. That and the pot in which he planted Kotoha’s head but that one is a gift from Gyokko so it doesn’t really count.
Kokushibou
As with most of them, we were blessed with enough info on Kokushibou’s, or rather Michikatsu’s, homes. Growing up a samurai, he never had time to spare, little to no friends and a bride who was most likely found for him without him having any say in it, it’s really not that much of a surprise he would elect to leave it all behind and become a demon slayer since it gave him significantly more freedom.
Even as a demon, not much have changed. During the day, he stays at a mansion like the samurai lord he is, and at night, he goes out to hunt down the pests in the area, more often than not treating himself with a bountiful feast while he’s at it. He also has a room in the Infinity Fortress but like the majority of the Upper Moon demons (actually everyone but Douma), he enjoys his solitude way more.
He has a few servants at the mansion. Ones that get replaced every once in a while when they mysteriously disappear. But the salary is high enough to let any major rumors die out in a blink (I know, I promised, I’m sorry) so the most he has to deal with are whispers about him overworking his servants to the point where they rather abandon the money and run away under the cloak of the night.
You would probably find the house eerily plain but he’s used to it. The backyard is where he spends most of his time aside from his room and those two are the only actually decorated places in the house. And they’re still kept neat and practical for the most part. He rarely has anything that wouldn’t serve a purpose, both when it comes to items and people.
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putschki1969 · 4 years
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Hello, Sara. My name is Claire and I am also a huge fan of Kalafina. In the light of their disband (I dont wanna use this word this makes me sad :( ), I still listen their music every single day. With all my Kalafina enthusiasm, your detail information about Kalafina was really helpful and cleared few things up in my mind. While I have been reading your posts, there are a lot of your thoughts and feelings toward Kalafina that I agree with. So I do appreciate your effort and kindness.
Okay, this is my first time I am using tumblr. didnt know they have limited number of words. So my question is that I know you posted that why Yuki Kajiura left Space Craft due the change of her manager if I remember correctly. And the manager did not allow Kajiura to make music in her own preferences. Do you think this intervention affected Kajiura’s work afterwards. Because when far on the water was released, I thought the way she composes music was a lot different than before.
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Hello Claire!
Yes, disbandment does sound very final so it’s really not a word I enjoy hearing in relation to Kalafina. However, I understand why Space Craft decided to use that term. It was time for them to make a clear cut so they could move forward.
No matter what, I am positive that one day they will stand on stage together (even if it is just for a single reunion-live). It will probably take years but it’s definitely going to happen.
Just like you I still listen to Kalafina and their solo projects regularly. I know some people find it painful to relive the old days but I personally find nothing but joy diving into Kalafina’s world again and again.
I am really glad my posts have been helpful. After all, spreading Kalafina-love is the sole purpose of this blog.
Yeah, sorry, Tumblr has quite a lot of character-limits when it comes to asks/messages/replies. Unlike many other social media platforms, Tumblr has not been designed with a focus on interaction (which is probably one of the reasons I chose to create my blog here XD).
Yes, Yuki’s long-time manager Mori ended up leaving Space Craft which in turn led to Yuki ending her contract as well. He had always given her some measure of free rein to do what she wanted. Generally speaking they have always been pretty close. In many of her old and new interviews Yuki talks a lot about wanting to have full control over what she creates. Which is why she was super excited to get the Kalafina project for Kara no Kyoukai. Space Craft put their faith in her and as we know, Yuki spun them gold. That’s not to say that she had control over everything. Creatively speaking, yes, I think she was allowed to make whatever she felt was best. However, the concept of Kalafina as we know them is almost entirely Space Craft’s brainchild. Yuki never meant to form a group with steady members and she definitely did not intend for the singers themselves to have so much spotlight. Let’s not forget, for Yuki, vocalists are really nothing more than human instruments. That’s totally fine of course but Space Craft knew that Kalafina wouldn’t have had a long life expectancy if things had gone according to Yuki’s vision. As a business-minded agency they naturally decided to use typical idol marketing strategies to promote Kalafina. It started with little things but gradually Kalafina became more and more “commercial” if you will. Don’t get me wrong, that’s not a bad thing. Good music alone unfortunately isn’t enough to survive in the Japanese music industry, you have to cater to the masses. And that’s what they did. Endless photo-heavy merch, lots of mainstream anime tie-ins, more elaborate stage productions, tons of appearances in popular events/TV programs etc…It’s those things that made their fanbase grow considerably which eventually led to them being able to perform THREE times at Nippon Budokan.
So yeah, what I am trying to say is that while Yuki gradually lost control over Kalafina as a “product” I don’t believe she ever yielded an inch when it came to her creative process. All the music she wrote was written because she wanted to write it, I am convinced of that. She doesn’t strike me as the type of person to phone in her work. Yes, her style has undergone some changes throughout the years (which weren’t always met with appreciation by fans) but for the most part I would say she has stayed faithful to her unique style (which most gifted composers do).
When “far on the water” was produced and released back in 2015 Mori was still Yuki’s manager and everything was perfectly fine. Any changes you might have noticed were absolutely on purpose. No one made Yuki do anything or guided her in a particular direction. This album is entirely her own vision and she loved making it, she has talked a lot about that in various interviews. She was also brimming over with further ideas for a new album which she was eager to produce (but alas, that never happened).
Things didn’t start falling apart until early 2017 when Mori left Space Craft (things didn’t seem to be perfectly peachy in late 2016 either but that’s reaching a bit too far). The changes from then onwards were very visible. Mori stopped being featured in the FictionJunction Club newsletters, the launch of Kalafina’s very own fan club Harmony was announced, all sorts of YK Lives went on hiatus, Kalafina’s 6th studio album which technically would have been due that year was never made, all focus went into increasing Kalafina’s live activities. I cannot say if at that point everyone had already predicted Kalafina’s fate and Space Craft were just milking the cow for all it’s worth or if that was a genuine effort to keep Kalafina alive as long as possible. I am leaning towards something in the middle of these two options. I think everyone involved had hoped for a better ending (or rather - no ending at all) but along the way (autumn 2017 I would say) it became clear to them that it wouldn’t work out.
I never outright said that the new management didn’t allow Yuki to do her own thing. Honestly, I have no idea if whoever replaced Mori was planning to take control of Yuki’s music. I suspect however that the new management might have wanted to take more of a lead which definitely would have put off Yuki… While tabloid articles have talked about creative differences between Yuki and the new manager, Yuki herself has never confirmed that that was the reason for her leaving (not that she ever would even if it were true). Yuki did however confirm in one of her FictionJunction Station newsletters that she no longer felt comfortable going on tour since she didn’t have the people around that she could trust. Maybe for a similar reason she didn’t feel like making a new Kalafina album which is why they had to focus so heavily on live activities that year.We are all creatures of habit. Yuki seems to only feel comfortable with Mori around. That’s fine. The only logical thing to do for her was follow his lead and leave Space Craft. Unfortunately she couldn’t take Kalafina with her so they ended up being collateral damage…*sighs*
And here we have another essay, sorry about that. it wasn’t my intention to write so much. My point is that I believe that in her time with Space Craft nothing/no one affected Yuki’s creative work, from the very first song “oblivious” right up until “Tombo” all songs are 100% Yuki and they were written/composed with much love, effort and dedication. Fans may not like everything she has created throughout the years but that’s just how life works. They have a hard time computing the fact that their favourite composer might have changed to an extent that they can’t appreciate anymore or that they themselves have developed different preferences. In such cases fans are eager to find someone to blame for that. Since they would rather not blame their idol Yuki they resort to blaming Space Craft. Space Craft have certainly done a lot of shitty stuff throughout the years but it would never cross my mind to make them responsible for Yuki’s music because that has always been under her control. 
Really, you shouldn’t be blaming anyone. These things happen, people change, people fall out of love with something. It’s easy to complain and lament the old days but what you have to do is just accept it, move forward and find something else.
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devintrinidad · 6 years
Text
10 GIFs of Anime that You Love, Then Tag 10 People
Just got tagged by @chemicalflashes.
Durarara
One of the first few anime I watched. I adored how the intricate stories were intertwined with others; how a bystander in one scene could be a hero or a villain in another. A choice that one makes can easily have devestaring consequences. And of course, the mastermind himself: Orihara Izaya.
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Death Note
Oldie, yes. Overrated, probably. Completely worth watching and still able to discuss a decade after completion? Along with a few movies, musical adaptations, and a live action remake? Oh, yes!
Favorite characters are Near and Misa. The former for his cool nature that resembles L’s, but ultimately serves as a better allegory for Justice because he doesn’t find Kira for fun. No, he captures and probably would have him imprisoned for life because it’s his duty as L’s successor. He’s also heavily under-appreciated by the fandom. The latter for her adaptability and unpredictability in situations. Did you guys watch the Yorsuba arc? The girl was calculating how cute she was going to be. Plus, she’s not mentally well (her parents were murdered in front of her), but she still managed to handle herself SO WELL during her time as a prisoner under L’s inhuman methods to seek out the Second Kira. Again, she’s under-appreciated.
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Death Parade
Brilliant idea. Has a possible tie in to Death Note. The opening was laughably so misleading!
There are some flaws, like plot holes and unfinished storylines, but it held up pretty well. We learned about the characters through how they interact with one another—especially when put under pressure. The Arbiters are amazing in that they can’t question the system, and yet, in the end, Decim tries to understand and formulate how Chiyuki is going to be finally put to rest.
If nothing else, just watch for the skating scene and the opening sequence.
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Cells at Work (Hataraku Saibou)
How could I not add this show??? I’m not that great science, but I have been intimately acquainted with how the body works (I’m frankly disappointed no one has called 1146 a granulocyte yet and we haven’t seen any neurons in the manga 😞). Also...3803 is basically me: I’m terrible at directions, I’m continuously learning new things because I moved away, and the way she met 1146...is kind of how I met my best friend, hehehe.
That said, I’m really in love with this anime/manga fandom and hope to continue writing for it. (Insert self promotion: please read my fanfics on my main platform which is ffnet!)
Another reason why I love CAW...
The neutrophil squad.
...and wbc x rbc...and by that, I mean any or all of those wbc squad can get paired with 3803. Because I have a soft spot for reverse harems. *cough Ouran High School Host Club*
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Hetalia: Axis Powers
This show made me love geography and my country so much. It’s funny, it’s hilarious, and it’s so heartwarming how the fandom likes to make all sorts of fanmade stuff to expand on what Hima-papa gives us. (YES, IN THE YEAR OF OUR LORD 2018, I SHALL REFER TO HIMARYU-SENSEI AS HIMA-PAPA. FIGHT ME.)
Is Hetalia dead? I don’t know, but the fandom and one particular FanFiction by @cultureandseptember really helped me out a few years back.
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Bungou Stray Dogs
I love literature, good looking animation, and smarmy little know-it-alls who like to play the fool. Hehehe, I’m planning on reading No Longer Human when I get the time. Does that mean Osamu Dazai is my favorite character? Well...
Can you blame me if I said yes? He’s so charming and enigmatic that you can’t help but love him. However, I think I really love him because I struggle with dark thoughts and suicidal ideation from time to time. I haven’t actively sought it out quite like he has in the past, but well... hehehe! I can also relate because he’s kind of like an outsider in the Agency due to his past—he’s different because he can’t actively cancel out your abilities, which always makes him a threat.
Anywhoozles, I’m still waiting to see the movie...Le sigh.
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K Project
This. This is not the best anime out there. Seriously.
The animation gets wonky here and there, they do the women in here a huge disservice, and they put too much emphasis on how great Mikoto Suoh. Like, he’s great and all, but the dude has no effect on the story except for the last season.
With that said, I think the main selling point here isn’t the anime, but the side materials like the manga/novels. You get to appreciate the backstories of so many of the characters and you get to feel for them because some of them have suffered so much! (Read: Fushimi Saruhiko).
I think you can get the same amount of enjoyment if you stick to the novels/manga.
Favorite characters: Scepter 4 Alphabet Squad. They are the best boys. Also, Lieutenant Awashima Seri. And Fushimi Saruhiko. You know what? Just put down Blue Clan here. They’re all nerds and they enjoy it.
Also: Domyoiji Andy reminds me of U-4989 from CAW. So...
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Violet Evergarden
Remember how I said that I liked literature? This entire anime is about the power of not only the written word, but of also the act of writing, sending, and receiving those words. The anime may be episodic in nature, but you can really connect with the character through her terrible backstory and really feel for her when she realizes that she needs to face her past. PTSD is real and I think the anime really handled the post war aspect of this torn down world really well.
I’m also a sucker for typewriters, steam punk, and characters that don’t really know how to function in society (but learn over the course of the story).
Watch this if you want feels...and get ready for episode ten.
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Samurai Champloo
This takes place in feudal era Japan.
But there’s rapping.
And breakdancing.
And guys spraying paint everywhere.
Also, there’s a sunflower samurai we gotta look for???
Hahahah, while episodic in nature, this was a joy to watch. You never get to know the characters really well and when we reach our mission’s end, it seems to fall short, but it’s not about that. The journey is what makes this anime worth it simply because the characters interactions are rife with hilarity and all three mains balance each other out. There’s a fanfic out there that describes them in detail, but in a succinct manner that had me melting. (https://m.fanfiction.net/s/2351750/1/The-Order-of-Things) check it out when you have the time.
Anyway, for those of you who have watched it, I sincerely hope that they meet again in the future.
(But, let’s be real. They probably didn’t).
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Tokyo Mew Mew
Guys.
This isn’t a joke.
I have a soft spot for this anime because this was my first ever anime I watched where I realized that this was anime. This was like my gateway anime. Not Sailor Moon. Not Naruto.
This.
Looking back on this, it wasn’t the best—it’s your typical monster of the week deal with some environmental activism involved but for what it’s worth...it’s good??? Like, even the 4Kids dub (DONT CRUCIFY ME) even added some songs that were really great??? Bree Sharp’s Don’t Wake Me Up was my jam??? It fit better than the original Japanese counterpart???
TMM also introduced me to shipping, FanFiction, and amvs. That’s right, without this little gem, I would be writing/writing/thinking about FanFiction. I probably wouldn’t have been an anime watcher without this magical girl anime from the early 2000s.
So, yeah. This anime will always have a place in my heart because without it, I probably wouldn’t have become the person I am today. Thank you, Tokyo Mew Mew.
(This was also the birth of my first OTP before I knew what OTPs were: Kisshu/Ichigo...although nowadays, people are calling them Quiche/Strawberry? Hehehe, there’s so many things wrong here, I only like interactions, not the implications. That’s why I’m completely okay with Aoyama/Ichigo being endgame—and they’re actually really cute in the sequel manga???)
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Honorable mentions (because I only thought of these now after I wrote analyses and gifs):
Five Centimeters Per Second
Ouran High School Host Club
Kimi no Nawa
Wolf Children
Psycho Pass
Trigun
(There’s like a dozen more, but nah. I’m good).
Aaaaaaaaaand that’s a wrap!!!
I’m tagging everyone who reads this! MWUAJAHAHAH!
I’m kidding; I don’t have that many friends here (if any) who are into anime so, umm...try it!
Thanks to @chemicalflashes for this amazing opportunity to find out why I love anime so much!
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homosexualeo · 6 years
Text
1. He spends half a semester staring at me across the seminar table, flirts with me over Instagram, Super Likes me on Tinder only to say “I don’t date other grad students, I just wanted to show you some love” when you then ask him out. I feel confident he never would have swiped right in the first place if we had never met.
2. Around others, they are aggressively friendly and even flirtatious. Although they make it a point to mention they love spending time with other people, other bodies, every attempt to spend time with them one on one gets deflected or expanded into group plans; either way they rarely come to fruition. Eventually, over text, they tell me they are dating someone. This is our primary means of communication; it is the one where my body is least present.
3. I ask S out, they say yes. After three dates they tell me they aren’t in a space for dating and intimacy is hard for them right now. We keep flirting. A month goes by and I ask to check in. They say nothing has changed; intimacy is still hard. Two weeks later I see them on Grindr. I know that Grindr is used for a lot of different reasons, but I wonder why we never talked abt boundaries around intimacy before breaking up, and it crystalizes what has transpired. It has happened. Again.
4. I meet a social media celebrity through A, a mutual friend. We have heard of each other, but aren’t connected and don’t follow the other. This is common for queer of color microcelebrities. Queers of color always seem to think my work on bodies is somehow not as relevant to our communities. They rarely connect with and uplift my work the way I see white people from fat communities. This night, I see them flirt with the tall, thin, light skinned friend we met through. They post my work about economies of care on their platform for Valentine’s Day. I am flattered, and wonder why we never even exchanged numbers.
5. I’m with S at a dance party, shortly before I ask them out. I turn around and they are talking to someone that had approached them and introduced themselves. I keep dancing. I turn around and they are making out. I leave to give them space. Sometime later my friend reappears near me. Before I can talk to them someone else approaches them. And then other. I give them space. At the end of the night I leave without having met anyone new, without being approached or feeling confident any attempt of mine to approach someone would be received positively.
6. I’m with S on a date at a gay bar. A lesbian interrupts us to fawn over how beautiful they are in their tall, thin whiteness. She only interacts with me to affirm their beauty. Later we are at a coffee shop. Someone approaches them for a blind date for a friend and they decline graciously. We are sitting at the same table but the person does not interact with me. And even later, they casually name a Black trans femme mutual friend as being ‘bad at rejection.’ I wonder if they have considered how an evidently superior handle of rejection is might correlate w an experience of having opportunities handed to you, an experience less common for those of us not tall, thin and white.
7. My thin friends tell me abt their dates and their hook ups. They seem to offer this information as if it were not imbued. My attempts at making these connections similarly are rarely successful. My messages get responded to so infrequently I have stopped sending them. I offer the emotional labor of processing their rejections with them, and am humbled to see that thin people experience this too. I try not to ask for it back; I’m not sure if they can hold it. I’m not sure I can ask for anything at all.
8. My queer friends of color commiserate abt having our hearts broken by white ppl and masculine ppl. I wonder why we aren’t dating eachother but I also know why. The people we are fawning over are all some combination of thin, white or masculine.
9. My tall, thin, light skinned friend A and I talk abt how their normatively desired body is fetishized and tokenized in communities. I have listened to their stories of people crushing on them. I know the discomfort and dehumanization of being fetishized or even just desired. I would still take it.
10. Someone messages me on a chubby chaser platform and I can tell they are also fat because their message is polite, cautiously friendly and purposefully vague. It reads like a message I would send. I wonder abt the collective social histories that have produced this dynamic, and also why this is the only platform where I have seen ‘married (to a woman)’ as a relationship status.
11. I go on two dates with a fat, white guy I match with on Tinder. I find him obnoxious and ultimately us incompatible.
12. I have a date invitation from a fat man of color older than me. I’m open but reluctant, unsure of how well our political beliefs and intellectual interests align. I accept halfheartedly.
13. I gaslight myself by saying standards and expectations are not luxuries I can afford if I want to be loved. I wonder if the people I want to love me ever tell themselves this.
14. I spend most of last Monday sexting with a guy on Grindr. He initiates race play by telling me to worship his big white cock and tell him how much better white men are. I do it willingly, eagerly, happily. It feels good that someone wants to be honest with me for once. It fucks up my sleep schedule and we never end up meeting as promised.
15. A new friend taps me on Grindr. I feel confused abt the whole situation and try to lean into it. He makes a big show abt wanting to hang out; I invite him over at 11pm and he takes a raincheck. We mention plans abt Friday but never confirm so I make other plans. When he txts me that morning I feel guilty and cancel my other plans. He says he will txt when he is free. I dont expect to hear from him and have a fine night alone, but it hurts to be flaked on. When he finally txts at 2am I check in abt our tentative plans. He apologizes that time got away from him and I say I understand but it felt bad, am honest abt it being triggering and ask him to be more mindful in the future. He responds affirmatively and over the next few days our previously casual and consistent texting throughout the day slows to a complete stop.
16. The next night, I have a reading with T. 3 of my thin friends show up. I realize it’s the first time I see S since they broke up with me the second time. A and C come from hooking up w different people. J invited someone they wanna kiss, who kisses them back. I come home and C texts me abt how cute T is; T texts abt how cute S is. My thin friends throw themselves at eachother in front of me, casually mention their easy access to sex and pretend I have not recently vented abt the difficult it is for me to meet people, even for casual sex. Everyone is angry at S when I tell them the story. They all seem to see themselves as different, as separate.
17. This is how it is and how it always has been. I have no reason to believe it will ever be different. I have no more good faith to cling to.
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misterbitches · 3 years
Text
here’s what confuses me. we are on a public platform and people are posting things, tagging them, and even just perusing. ostensibly to be heard and get engagement. that’s how the internet works and what it encourages. so when people put something out there especially when they make it localized (? is that a right word) for access, why is the critique or response, even if it’s unfavorable, now a problem? we put it out there and it exists, if someone stumbles upon it why wouldn’t they engage? otherwise, why bother with all this output? i mean not many people read my posts but it’s a good thing for me to have them because what i do write it helps me understand the world better and something mainstream in ways it could be better and what could be done to get away from it. helping understand the context and history of the problems i am seeing on screen in many diff ways. but i do make it seen for a reason. i have drafts or posts privately that are just for me that i don’t think others should see so that means i do not want that engagement and i am closing it off. 
it isn’t like people can’t see it and respond if they so choose  bc this is basically a tacit agreement of having this in public. so if you have an opinion and someone disagrees why would that be hard for you if you are the one who put it out there? we know how this website works and how the web works. do we just want to hear what we agree with or even just know? otherwise i wouldn’t know shit. even with my best friends we try and come to a form of understanding and get on the same page or ask questions. i don’t get upset when they say, “no, because” or introduce a new perspective and this happens with the people i am closest to. so on a public place what else would we get? we allow ourselves to be seen...
i don’t think i have blocked anyone but i know people have blocked me and it has been for probably me being annoying but still fairly innocuous when i reply with a critique or make a joke. you take this risk posting it every time. but i dont want to block people because they could be of value at some point even if i want nothing to do with them. but every time it so happens that i say something even a little off from what this person wants—and it’s generally when i go into things in detail—they shut down from the perception that i am being hateful or accusatory or unfair? even when i try de-escalation tactics or being like “calm down” (not that explicitly) so these seem to be very emotional responses to not hearing exactly what we want and knowing there’s objection when there should be anyway. even if pieces are damn near perfect there’s still something. i find it very hard to believe that there’s intense pain enacted on others for liking “unsavory” things when the “unsavory” is the mainstream and it is necessary to uphold these things and for capital to continue to produce what it does. you’re not different when you accept it into your life either critically or uncritically because that is the norm. so when people are knocking the norms, tropes, whatever it’s like a shock every time and like someone is telling you not to enjoy it. but, again, we put this shit out there and want a response so it cannot be just what we want to hear. i hate that i hate the idea that wanting a  work to be better and seeing shit critically even as a leftist or whatever is oppressive and limiting other ppl when it is in no way the same or even on par with being silenced in general because of the garbage you find in a work. you will still be the minority and it will still be popular so there’s a false sense of superiority put onto others who disagree by the ones who feel “attacked” or like they can’t defend themselves or whatever. and who fucking says? if some random says so like oh well man. you cannot compare it to the real shit these fans do and the massive fanbases they have and the shunning they love to do then feel as if they are priority in feelings.
 they say everyone is sensitive and not able to think about things with nuance but it’s the opposite most times. you aren’t and when someone pops up with it or even says something offhanded cos they dont feel like having a huge discussion that is not the same as pushing others down. there is no majority saying this is wrong and we don’t want it; there’s a majority dedicated to defending it, their choices, and frankly the false sense of even light persecution. especially as adults but in fandom you’re not encouraged to act as a fully fleshed out person for a majority reasons and esp in a fandom that will skew younger. they are reliant on rabid fans or uncritical ones and i have demonstrated that constantly and given quotes etc. we should talk about discourse and what the private owes to the public, what the state owes its viewers, what artists owe the people tuning in. we should talk abou tfreedom of speech forreal and what that means but if we go deep into that you’ll unveil more things you dont’ like how people absolutely rally against this shit and want nothing to do with it. if you don’t want to think about that that is fine but it doesn’t mean others won’t say it.
idk like it may seem insensitive but i dont like the idea that a person pointing out things that are gross or micro or macro agrressive or what the fuck ever is the ruler over the discourse and how people interact with the work when frankly that just isn’t the case in the pattern of the work that people do and utilizing fans and using capital to defend yourself and recreate industry. you may not like to hear that it’s all bullshit but people will say so and it holds not even close to the same weight that the tacit agreement in indulging can sway  us towards not great perceptions. the harm of pointing things out, or being rude, or whatever is not the same as what fans will do to those people and the obfuscation of the real fucking issue. 
now it’s no longer about the problems in itself but the way people are receptive to the way others respond when they have a problem with the very real and prominent problem. now there’s no interest in engagement or even seeing people who may have more to say to it. if we think constantly about defending our right to like a work then the work takes ona life of its own and it latches on to your emotions even more it’s so fucking silly bc it’s like....this shit isnt for us anyway and if it’s gonna be here we should make it better and talk about it but it’s not about that it’s not about the rapes it’s not about the culture it’s about personal feelings which is why it becomes about how we talk about it as if things that ever skew to the left or focus on liberation would ever be the most popular. since when did saying this is fucking bullshit, this shit sucks, this real “crime” means nothing because it’s just entertainment yet you must find ways to defend your right to see that entertainment. it makes no sense no one is talking about that we’re talking about the ins-and-outs of storytelling and the toxicity and nature of these REAL PROBLEMS THAT ARE PROBLEMS SINCERE PROBLEMS as in there is no negotiation in wrong or right because it is wrong in every sense it’s what you do with that wrongness and what the fuck you want to say. it’s not about what i say about them being fucking shitty about the way they say it. dont focus on the way i dislike it focus on what the fuck im saying man bc this shit is disingenuous and it COMPLETELY eclipses the issues and attitudes and it lets these fucking idiots off the fucking hook for making straight up garbage like not even in a sociopolitical way just thoughtless drivel sometimes. like most times i dont even hate the villains in these shows or the men who are o dark and fucked up but we still got to like them it’s literally like “no nigga like why r u here tho?” what do u fucking add. you’re dead space and they let us know it’s dead space by saying “oh man isn’t life SOOOO complex dont think about it just think about him being a nice rapist okay guys even tho we are gong to do NOTHING ABSOLUTELY NOTHING to establish fucking any of that” 
this is what people said for tharntype and it’s what they say about fucking everything whether it’s about gay shit or not. good example is the star wars fans with that guy and that girl or wahtever in that stupid racist franchise. just clamoring to make sure we know you’re good and that you’re okay for thinking that way when no one says you aren’t. but if something is presented then expect to get a fucking response especially abut what it is about at its fucking core. enough of the bullshit about misunderstanding and acknowledge it’s about your comfort in your interests and not having that questioned or antagonized in a way that may implicate you are a bit complicit but fucking all of us are as consumers. you arent hurt for having an opinion that seems to not go with the flow but is certainly part of the status quo. the world relies relies on harm, in a way it is reliant on rape, and that permeates through us and always takes precedent. additionally, again, this shit is mad patriarchal so it does a disservice to us as well as women cos it’s like. no man that’s born out of misogyny actually. what can we do? well, dont rely on the state. but if you dont rely on the state then will you make real money? not the money we’re talking here with the genre in itself. to me that means they dont have an interest in showing different types of lives they have a majority interest in showing “attractive” “conventional” men kissing and making bank.
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snkpolls · 6 years
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SnK Chapter 99 Poll Results
The chapter 98 poll closed with 1,751 responses. Thank you to everyone who participated.
RATE THE CHAPTER 1,722 Responses
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On the “awful” to “awesome” scale of 1-5, nearly 70% of respondents rated “Guilty Shadow” with a “5″, making it the highest rated chapter since we started polling. Well done, Isayama!
On that day, Marley received a grim reminder... this chapter woke up the obsessed snk fan in me, finally JESUS CHRIST
SNK has always been a wild ride, but I don't believe I've ever been this excited and frustrated that I don't have the next chapter in my hands RIGHT NOW- if only to satisfy the itch of knowing which half-hidden face is who from Paradis. And also to figure out what they've done to Porco, Pieck and Zeke to neutralize them while Eren gives Reiner the most uncomfortable tableside chat.
My heart was pounding throughout the entire chapter. The last time that happened was chapter 84 and I gotta say, I finally feel like this whole Marley arc has been worth it. What an adrenaline rush it's become! Now that's now Attack On Titan is supposed to be. I can't wait to see everybody else again and proceed to reach the climax of the story.
The hype for SNK 100 is too real. Everything will explode
I need Ch100 right now immediately. Waiting another month is going to be torture. In the meantime I hope Porco and Pieck enjoy their time in the pit. If it turns out that Helos is Levi I will eat my own platform boots
It was amazing. Really great story.
I'm so glad this chapter is fake and SnK ended last month with everyone having a huge pizza party!
....is it December yet?
  DID THIS CHAPTER SHOOK YOU? 1,711 Responses
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To not be excited by this chapter was simply not an option, but I’ll assume that those who voted “Yes”  are slightly more subdued than the majority of us who shouted “AW YISS”.
omfg hype for next chapter!!! How does Eren not have a leg, it really should've grown back, this doesn't make sense. Why is he even there, I feel like I missed something but it's probably just this manga's bizarre structuring. I've been selling my soul the past few months. There is nothing more to sell.
Kill me now The hype is REAL. I had a feeling issue #100 would be THE BANGER. This issue (#99) however set the stage for the next one. We have potentially Connie and Jean going undercover, we have Willy's solution that is just about to be revealed, the Asian woman's sudden leave, etc. I am really excited to see what will happen next month. Just need to add: seeing Eren's hand cut to threaten Reiner and Falco was such a power move, I had chills all over.
Boy howdy this was crazy I'll tell you what
Holy crap I love isayama. What a genius!
God help me I cannot wait another month
Endgame right here, brothers.
#shooketh
  WHAT SIDE CHARACTER MOMENT DID YOU MOST APPRECIATE? 1,720 Responses
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The giant red chunk that wins this question  is the “All of the Above” option with 26.4% of the vote. “Every character with a partially hidden face” was second with 23.8%. There was plenty of excitement around Trapdoor-kun. He came in third with close to 20% of the vote.
I hope the SnK world has a heaven or some shit, because then Bertolt can maybe be finally happy together with his dad at least ;-;
ANNIE IS ALIVE AND FREE CHAPTER 100 HYYYYYYPE
I love moment with Trapdoor-kun/Connie (I hope it's him). He promised Reiner in Utgard Castle that he'll return the favor and I want to see their reunited. Maybe Connie will save Gabi and the other kids in this shitstorm. Please Isayama! Connie needs his personal moment!
  ON THE SCALE FROM “FLUFFY KITTEN” TO “ACTUAL PENNYWISE”, HOW CREEPY WAS EREN IN THIS CHAPTER? 1,727 Responses
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Eren’s creep factor was strong! More than 70% of us picked a 4 or 5 on the “Actual Pennywise” scale.
Eren is 100% savage. Damn I'd be lying to myself if I said I didn't like him. His meddling works so well with his bitter ass and his sense of entitlement over making all these fuckers taking his freedom away disappear and get their comeuppance (read: the whole world). Fucking human worms.
Eren using Falco as a hostage makes me cry
Eren gave me fucking chills of fear
I'm loving this Eren alignment shift. Lawful Good boy is changing and I am HERE for this.
Eren's "Same reason as you" and "I don't have a choice" are the single most savage moment in the series.
I don't like Eren at all... Poor Reiner
Eren is frickin INSANE
  ON THE SCALE FROM 1 - 420/69, HOW MUCH DID EREN ACTIVATE YOUR HARDENING ABILITIES IN THIS CHAPTER? 1,713 Responses
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The creep factor and hobo hair didn’t hurt Eren’s attractiveness for the majority of the fandom since 36.1% would love to be locked in the basement with him right now. The second most popular choice was the extreme opposite. 22.2% selected “ewww no” on the question about Eren’s attractiveness.
why did y'all have to write "Lock me in your basement, Hobo Daddy!"
Protect Reiner Braun You've made me have sexual thoughts about long haired Eren, damn you pollster!!!!
Eren made both my jaw and panties fall straight to the floor. It's finally getting somewhere.
my mom called eren hobo daddy o__O"
Eren being so chilled out and yet so chilling at the same time...how does one being so cold make the room seem a lot hotter than it actually is?!
I want to officially shame Eren for telling Mikasa to cut her hair during training and now he could model for   L'Oréal (I love his hair but he is a hypocrite)
EREN FUCKING JAEGER. I want to say he's cool... but I feel so strangely conflicted. I'm turned on by his loony face but at the same time fucking terrified that it's all going to crumble. He'd grown so much. I can't believe the kid that we used to adore has turned into such a beast.
eren would be a 4/5 if he shaved his facial hair imo
  WHAT WAS EREN’S MOST CHILLING MOMENT? 1,717 Responses
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Again with the “All of the above” as top pick. The most popular write in was “Reiner. Sit”. We clearly made a mistake when we forgot to include that.
Reiner. Sit.
His eyes all the time, they're like windows to hell
Everything! Eren was so chilling and bad this chapter, I love love loved it!
The fact that he's still missing a leg, it should've grown back, does he just keep cutting it off?
Messing with the head of an already mentally unstable Reiner
Eren did not come to play. Cutting his hand was a power move and then when he said "same as you." I can't wait to see him transform into a Titan. Reiner wasn't ready for this. He looks like he's gonna pass out.
I never thought i needed psycho!eren and badass!eren in my life. But then i read this chapter and HOOOOOOLY SHIT!
  WHICH OF REINER’S TORTURED FACES WAS YOUR FAVORITE? 1,707 Responses
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I’m borrowing a quote from a friend who said, “Reiner had enough panels of his sanity crumbling like pie crust to fill a photo album”. We thought so too and had a hard time limiting ourselves to just these six. The look of horror on page 20 was Reiner’s expression as Eren told him, “I’m the same as you. I didn’t have any other choice.” It was the winner with 44.5% of the voice.
Note to Isayama: If you want to torture a character, hands on the face is the way to go (even when those hands are strangely tiny.)
Don't freak out, Reiner, your buddy Eren has come to save the world just like you've always wanted.
I wonder how bad  will Reiner's strabismus be when Eren ultimately touchs the Bertolt and Annie subject.
Someone please protect Reiner D: (and maybe give him a hug)
ISAYAMA STAHP TORTURING REIGNER!
#stopreinerabuse2017 >:) 
Reiner is the true victim here man
If Reiner didn't have a drinking problem before he sure has one now
I really don't like seeing Reiner looking so scared... It makes me feel so bad and helpless because I can't do anything. ;-;
I’m expecting Reiner to go full insane next chapter. Seriously, he can only be pushed so far!
I absolutely love Reiner's suffering faces :D I also loved how shocked Falco was. I have a feeling that something bad is going to happen, that why Eren told him to stay. He wants to save his life. I only wonder what will happen with the other kids.
reiner has baby hands
  CAN YOU PINPOINT THE EXACT MOMENT FALCO’S HEART SHATTERED? 1,700 Responses
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This was not a fun chapter for our poor little bean. There was no shortage of moments with him looking on with wide-eyed horror as the situation was unfolding.  His expression on page 35 was the landslide winner. It’s the moment Falco realized Eren must’ve met Reiner during his time on Paradis.
My boy Falco doesn't deserve this.
DONT HURT BABBY FALCO 
Calm the f down Eren! You’re scaring Falco!
Falco is too precious for this messed up world
  WHAT IS RANDO MCSOLDIER WHISPERING TO MADS? 1,709 Responses
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We have a poll meme now and don’t think I wont use it! Thank you to the 29.1% of you for playing along. We were a close second. Thank you also to everyone who took the question seriously. One respondent suggested they might be whispering about the fact that all the warriors were missing. I love that thought.
Yes. There's sour cream in Marley.
For the question of what Rambo McSoldier whispered, I'm actually kinda wondering if he's whispering about someone being missing from the crowd. (I.e, Reiner.)
how much farther is my sour cream joke going to go
I do NOT trust Eren one bit and we still do NOT know if there's sour cream. Crazy stuff man.
This wasn't an option for the question about what the soldier was whispering to Mads, but I thought it had to do with that panel where the guy on the rooftop said to "report it" no matter how small it is. The Marley soldier was relaying that report, whatever it is.
The lack of concern over the disappearance of all the Warriors from the audience is alarming...unless it's part of their plan, which removing the fighters from the crowd sounds like something inline with what Paradis would be attempting if they're about to hijack the play.
  CHARACTER ALLEGIANCES! WHICH SIDE DO YOU THINK EACH PERSON IS ULTIMATELY SUPPORTING?
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So much uncertainty here! We are truly divided over Willy, Zeke and Kiyomi’s loyalties.
I do not think that Zeke would be on Paradis side, he had that chance and discarded it as an idiot.
The Warhammer Titan seems to know so very much about Paradis and the truth (and Eren's name) that I think it's no coincidence he looks like an adult long hair Armin.
Willy was such a sweet pie in this chapter. I wish he joined the Team Paradise.
Why did the Asian lady wish Willy good luck and then immediatly got away from the play as fast as she could? The plot thickens...
Everyone need to calm tf down and stop being huge mega douchebags on the whole warriors vs paradis sides of the fandom Ima lose my goddamn mind let yams tell the fucking story. This fandom is killing me far more effectively than yams ever could, crying Reiner or no!
The Asian lady and the rest of the Azumabito definitely know something, as they didn’t stay for Willy’s play, and she said that “she hoped he’d play his role ‘safely’”
What is Willy's game? With so many important people there, it is setup for a massacre. But, why tell the truth beforehand? There is a part of me thinking that it is all a setup to Willy simply saying we're all going back to Paradis.
  WHAT ALLIANCE DO YOU THINK IS MOST LIKELY? 1,697 Responses
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EZ and REZ feelz so strong! A sizable percentage think Kiyomi is also a part of the alliance.
I love/hate how much Isayama plays with us (?).. this is the worst who is with  who and why and when and how is it its 99 chapters and i am stiff as confused as when i watched the first anime chapter in 2013...
Yeah, I still believe in Reiner + Zeke + Eren alliance. Grim Reminder won't happen and I will be a happy, happy fan." İt's amazing!
I think Willy is working with Armin, whereas, Eren is working with Zeke. Isayama did say they were going to split.
I think Zeke is helping Eren for the time being but I also think it is only a temporary alliance. He will double-cross Paradis like he did the Restorationists and Marley before the end, and he will be a sizable end-game threat to both Paradis and Marley.
"Lady" Kiyomi of the Azmabito family seemed like she was teasing Willy before his performance, since he was so nervous. But then, she said "you're very brave. And you know our family very well", she seemed like she was threatening Willy
I ABSOLUTELY LOVE CRAZY EREN. I think he's gonna offer an alliance with Reiner so they can both save the Eldians. I hope the SC will appear next chapter!
I'm willing to bet 'The Owl' Eren knew Willy and the Asian chick when he was still living.
  WHY WERE PORCO AND PEICK SEPARATED? 1,715 Responses
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62% believe Porco and Pieck were captured to keep them from meddling. An even larger majority believe Zeke was in on it. Hmmmm....
about porco and pieck. I think they will be locked somewhere. But not to take their titan. Well, it's good opportunity to take their titan but... who wants do that anyway? Jean, connie? I think not.
PLEASE SAVE PIECK
"We done fucked up" -peick and porco
My favourite panel is Pieck looking at 'springer, not a shower' whilst falling into the sin bin. Wow, she's perfect.
Porko remains oblivious
  WAS ZEKE PART OF THE PLOT TO SEPARATE PORCO AND PEICK? 1,701 Responses
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That would be a solid “yes”.
Zeke does seem to comply with too much questionable activity to not be working secretly with someone. He doesn't question being separated from Pieck and Porco, he's the only one not facing the guard that summons them, he let - encouraged- Reiner to go with Falco right as the ceremony started, and the baseball mitt Eren had likely had something to do with him. The Zekeret is still a wild card though so it makes all this hard to pinpoint.
  WHO IS THE SOLDIER THAT TOSSED PORCO AND PIECK INTO THE BALL PIT? 1,691 Responses
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Nearly 80% of the fandom thinks Connie is  parading around Marley as a very tall Marleyan soldier. The write in responses on this were insane!
A pikupork shipper
Hajime Isayama
The Plothelping Titan
If Pieck knows him, the most probable option is Connie, buuuut... Is he even taller than Porco? He used to be really short, has he grown up?
When I first read the chapter and found similiarities between Connie and the trap-kun soldier I was like "what the fuck?!" And than I thought Connie being that soldier would be absolutely LIT.
I don't think any of the background characters are people we know. We saw how Isayama does that with Amputee-Kun, he appeared several chapters before the official reveal and there was no doubt once it was done. Trapdoor-kun, Helos Cosplayer, anyone else? Nope. as expected of pieck, she figured out the soldier was an impostor
Personally I really hate how people are making these predictions and analyzing details like chin shape in attempt to recognize him. We simply do not see enough of his face to tell who it is so it's pointless that people are arguing about it so vehemently. It could be Connie. I could be Levi. It most definitely isn't Armin. It could be a whole lot of people but right now at least half of the people will be wrong about it so arguing is going to get us nowhere. End of rant.
Zofia from the future, who traveled through paths
  DID PIECK PASS A MESSAGE TO THE SOLDIER SHE HUGGED? 1,717 Responses
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Yes. As expected.    WHO IS THE HELOS COSPLAYER? 1,703 Responses
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Jean trounced this poll question with 64.4% of the vote. “No one important” was second with 18.4%. 8% are hopeful it’s Levi.
A Majestic Stallion
A member of Paradis Team, but it is too early to say who
Jean dressed up as Levi aka the REAL Helos (Deja Vu).
Kenny "The Ripper" Ackerman rides again!
I want the Helos cosplayer to be Hange, but if it's not, Armin would be interesting.
  WHAT ARE YOU MOST HOPEFUL FOR IN CHAPTER 100? GO NUTS AND CHOOSE AS MANY AS YOU WANT. 1,718 Responses
1,161 (67.6%) Seeing the rest of the SC
1,134 (66%) Annie. Please. It’s been 84 years,
1,027 (59.8%) Information about character loyalties
1,013 (59%) Learning Willy’s “one solution”
875 (50.9%) The Warhammer Titan
788 (45.9%) Eren wreaking havoc
781 (45.5%) More Reiner suffering
747 (43.5%) RIP everyone sitting in the audience at the play
652 (38%) Grim Reminder
565 (32.9%) Action with the Asian Clan
534 (31.1%) Overwhelmed Falco turning into a falcon and flying away
Seeing the rest of the Survey Corps is our dearest wish, followed by a sighting of Annie. The most common write-in was simply “Levi”.
RIP Gabi and everyone else in the audience. But mostly Gabi.
I'm saying it now - there won't be another Grim Reminder. It would be the worst possible move to make. However, I can see some sort of staged assault happening.
What if chapter 100 is just an elaborate reenactment of the finale of shrek two where shrek and the gang ambush the castle with a collosal gingerbread man whilst fairy godmother sings. Honestly I would pay good money to see willy start singing 'i need a hero' with a choir behind him make it happen isayama I believe in you.
I am going to sell my soul for chapter 100
All the pieces are being set in place. It is about to begin. We don't know for sure what will happen but things are about to get wild. Prepare the feelingstrain cause we're all hopping aboard
  HOW BADLY DO YOU WANT TO RETURN TO THE ORIGINAL CAST ON PARADIS? 1,712 Responses
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No matter how great a chapter is, we remain desperate for the original cast. Last month 34.5% select “5” on the poll. This month that number was up to 38.1%.
And gimme some of that paradis crew daddy yamyams ✊️💦✊️💦😩
I'm severely lacking in Ackervitaminz
I'm tired of Marley to be honest. I hope next chapter shakes me, because this chapter didn't at all.
i still wanna know what the little miserable gremlin man is doing and my badass child Hanji
I loved the Marley chapters, but GOD I NEED MY PARADIS CREW THE SNEAK PEAKS ARE KILLING ME
while I haven't really been in any rush to return to the main cast, I'll be really excited to learn that they've all infiltrated Marley in this way, and for some final smack down to begin soon.
It's just a setup chapter I just want my Mikasa fix.
GIVE ME MIKASA AND ARMIN  BACK. I MISSED MY BABIES. I WOULD SELL BOTH OF MY KIDNEYS TO SEE THEM WELL AND HAPPY AGAIN. JUST GIVE ME THAT WISH ON CHAPTER 100 ISAYAMA. AM I ASKING TOO MUCH?
  WHICH CHARACTERS DO YOU GENERALLY ENJOY THE MOST 1,717 Responses
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Cries forever for my vets.
Nearly 100 chapters in and I feel like I'm losing my damn mind. Oof. Isayama...amazing. PS: I will continue to select 'The Vets' even long after The Vets are gone!!!
(fist bumps you, my friend!)
   WHERE DO YOU PRIMARILY DISCUSS THE SERIES 1,695 Responses
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Last month this question was 40% Tumblr and 48% Reddit. This month Reddit was most active on the poll with 56.8% of the responses. The other platforms remained consistent.
"Where do you primarily discuss the series" giving 4chan the silent treatment?  Although I guess what they do doesn't really count as discussing.
  ANY OTHER CHAPTER THOUGHTS YOU'D LIKE TO SHARE? We had 360 write-in responses and some were essay sized in length! Thank you all for your enthusiasm! Here’s a portion of the comments.
  EXTRA DANCC
It's about to be lit fam
NERD-SQUAD TO THE RESCUE! Nothing but goosebumps for that entire chapter thankyou.
If Helos is actually a lie created by Marley and Tybur, then was the devil of all the earth a lie too? Or did it exist in reality? Will it return? And how the hell could Tybur know of Kenny and Uri sitting in front of that lake? Does he have some spies on Paradis? All this stuff is just becoming more and more fishy...
I want everyone to die.
Is it just me or did Reiner lose weight? Not aroused. Isayama sensei please try harder.
Pieck grabbing Zophia's shoulders. 100%. A+. As expected.
Okay, so, we've been speculating like mad on how Eren arrived in Marley. Reiner asked the same thing. And Isayama, through Eren's words, answered us: "is that really what you want to ask first?" LIKE DAMN, at this point I'm sure Isayama reads our blogs. At least he answered the "Why", kinda...
for god sake. reiner's suffering have to stop TTTTT-TTTTT
Bertl deserve this world.
Isayama has officially changed his icon to Reiner. Protagonist confirmed. It was Reiner's story all along. We were just along for the ride. The very traumatic ride.
I love the parallel between Reiner and that old man that hanged himself back in Paradis. I'm quite sure that Reiner, like the hanged-man, is looking for judgement. Cool to see how Bert nightmares played a big role in the end.
sc stans are insane I wonder how bad  will Reiner's strabismus be when Eren ultimately touchs the Bertolt and Annie subject.
needs more porco
Is Eren gonna sacrifice himself for the sake of saving the world as a scapegoat? Will his death be the only meaningful one in the whole series??
I hope to God Armin has a different haircut.
Learning that we're getting ova of Lost Girls and reading this chapter was the best way to start my week. I love you I wish Isayama hadn't made Reiner so hot. Too hard to focus on everything else going on =\
if reiner wants to get judged maybe he should look to judge judy for judgement, that'd be lit
I love my shifter kids, but they're fucked.
I don’t personally think there will be a Grim reminder 2.0, Paradis people, ie Armin, Hanji and all, usually don’t fight fire with more fire, they plan better shenanigans. Also, how they would be considered better than marleyans if they did the same stuff? They won’t play this low, they also know that Grim reminder™️ Is everything but effective.
Isayama why it's great that we have all those informative, descriptive chapters but something need to happen. I hope that next chapter will be full of action.
SHOW ME MIKASA AND LET HER AND EREN  BE MARRIED. And let annie be alive and well and dont make reiner any sadder. #chap100 No
Soldier, who are you? Willy, what are you really trying say? Eren, will you start causing some trouble? Levi, come out!" AAAAAAAAAAAaa!!!!
Pieck was actually exactly right! I always loved her design and oppressed but trying her best herb merchant aesthetic. So cool that she saved the lives of Reiner and Zeke, her influence on character relationships and the plot.
In RtS I wanted Reiner dead. Half to end his suffering, half to be vindicated for the things he'd done, but I guess it was Berty Beetle's turn.
I miss Levi so much, it's been such a long time since we've seen him and all I want is for him to keep his promise to Erwin and obliterate Zeke.  I can see him now, sitting with his arms crossed as Zeke enters the room.  "Been a while, you piece of shit.  Not so tough now when you're not ripping a bunch of people in half with rocks, eh?"  He cracks his knuckles.  "I will destroy you.  I will make it hurt.  Because you killed Erwin Smith and I promised him, I *promised him* that I would end this fight for him." Ahhhh please Isayama. <3
CHAOS FOR THE CHAOS GOD The slow build has been so worth it, we're all going to hell and I can't wait
Annie is alive. That shouldn't be a point of discussion anymore,
Please make my children happy, they suffered enough
I really think Jean is the Helos cosplayer because of face/mouth shape. That might be wishful thinking though :') Also DAMN EREN REALLY IS HOBO DADDY
ISAYAMA CAN YOU PLEASE DRAW BERTL FAMILY OR PHOTO OF HOOVER HOUSE OR WHAT SO I CAN REST IN PEACE I WANNA BERTL AGAIN I DONT CARE WITH OTHERS 
I just want to say that the chapter 99 pre release megathread on /r/ShingekiNoKyojin was one of the best things to ever happen, and i'm proud to be a part of it.
Now i just want to see jean What if we're all just too hopeful and in reality the helos cosplayer and trapdoor-kun are just normal people. If Annie isn’t coming back I’m rioting honestly. Also where TF is mikasa?!
I LOVE PIECK SO MUCH she is becoming one of my fave characters. Also hopefully nothing happens to cause Reiner’s mental state to become worse than it is right now. CAN’T WAIT FOR NEXT CHAPTER I think the Asian woman is Mikasa. My evidence to support this claim is that after she talked to Willy, she said ‘let’s go’ to her body guards. As if she knows what’s going on.
Seeing Pieck being smart and quick-witted made me like her even more. I'd be very sad if she ends up being killed or if Porco and her never truly meet the original main cast. Give us those warriors/soldiers interactions Isayama.
Annie...please...it has been too long now...
Regarding Eren he ackwonledged that Reiner and co. were just clueless kids trying to save the world when they destroyed the Wall. And he is stating that he as well has been forced in this role. I think he is trying to bring Reiner to his side as well as to remove a Warrior (and Falco) from the stage where things will soon go wild.
This shit was lit lit lit!!! I need war!
If the marley arc was a dubstep song, this chapter was the part where the song builds up in speed and frequency and ends right before it levels off and the beat subsequently drops. Ya feel? Warriors, come out to plaaaaay.
IMO PIECK IS ON EREN'S SIDE AND SHE ACTED IN FRONT OF PORCO
I want to know who works with who (especially ZEKE), how they arrived in Marley, I want the SC but also I really love the Warriors, asdfghjkl I really don't know what to expect but I love the way Isayama keeps us on this subtle line between ""OMG"" and ""WTF MAN"". I want some answers!  AND I DEFINITELY WANT ANNIE BACK
I hope Sasha is in Marley too. She needs pizza.
Too few panels of Marco's death. 😠
i miss zeke memes
PATHS
I love the art in the recent chapters. I will forgive slow pacing for good art.
Karina is a bitch
Isayama give Reiner a break or kill him already, end the suffering pls
And lastly, the Rick and Morty copypasta meme made it's way into our poll. I laughed!
To be fair, you have to have a very high IQ to understand Attack on Titan. The humor is extremely subtle, and without a solid grasp of theoretical physics most of the jokes will go over a typical viewer's head. There's also Eren's nihilistic outlook, which is deftly woven into his characterisation - his personal philosophy draws heavily from Narodnaya Volya literature, for instance. The fans understand this stuff; they have the intellectual capacity to truly appreciate the depths of these jokes, to realize that they're not just funny- they say something deep about LIFE. As a consequence people who dislike Attack on Titan truly ARE idiots- of course they wouldn't appreciate, for instance, the humour in Zeke's existential catchphrase "As expected of Pieck 👉😶👉," which itself is a cryptic reference to Turgenev's Russian epic Fathers and Sons I'm smirking right now just imagining one of those addlepated simpletons scratching their heads in confusion as Hajime Isayama's genius unfolds itself on their television screens. What fools... how I pity them. 😂 And yes by the way, I DO have a Reiner and Historia tattoo. And no, you cannot see it. It's for the ladies' eyes only- And even they have to demonstrate that they're within 5 IQ points of my own (preferably lower) beforehand.
Thank you also to those left nice comments about the poll. We appreciate it!
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thelifetimechannel · 6 years
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sundancingdragon · 4 years
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ATTENTION: REPOSTER ON TWITTER/INSTAGRAM - glojo3798 / GlojoCuscuhing
Hey guys, I will take some of your time here by writing about this particular Star Trek gifs reposter that’s been brought to my attention, but first let me provide some links explaining what reposting is and why it is bad. See posts here and here. A lot of gif makers and other content creators have faced reposters since tumblr exists and I myself wrote a lot of posts about it, but those sum it up well.
Recently I was notified by @ansonmountdaily that there is a massive reposter who’s been going through tumblr stealing thousands of Star Trek gif sets over the course of at least three years, and reposting them on their Instagram and Twitter accounts glojo3798 and GlojoCuscuhing, 99.99% of the time without giving credit to the original gif makers on tumblr, which come from every Star Trek fandom (TOS, TNG, VOY, DS9, Discovery and Picard) See list by AnsonMountDaily at the bottom of the post for a sampling of gif makers that have been targeted. The purpose of this post is to let people know their work has been reposted offsite without credit. It is not meant to attack the reposter in any way.
This individual has reposted 7000+ gif sets for which they’ve received thousands of views and likes from their 4100+ Instagram and 1700+ Twitter followers. Reposts include gifs clearly watermarked with the gif makers’ names but conveniently re-cut by them to make the watermark on gifs harder to see. Glojo also has the habit of combining stolen gifs, creating a collage, changing the size and order of the gifs, putting additional text over the graphic, and sometimes even their own watermark on stolen edits (original), giving the impression they’re the creator of those works. To top it off, Glojo has turned other people’s gifs into “birthday gift” collages, tagging Star Trek actors’ Twitter/Instagram handles on the reposts, again making it seem as if the gifs were their creations.
Glojo knows where the gifs originate from because the captions on the reposts are often the same as on the tumblr posts, and on the rare occasion they do admit the gifs are not theirs, it’s done in a vague manner, in the style “credit to the owner” (“gif from tumblr”) which is not credit at all, it’s merely acknowledging the platform the gifs come from, when credit should be given to specific users.
Before AnsonMountDaily told me about the reposting I did not know about any of this and am pretty sure the gif makers on the list didn’t either. They have since been notified. Glojo was contacted via Instagram about giving credit more than once, only to block those users. I myself wrote to them (also commented) about it, but they were not even bothered to answer me, but still continued to repost my works after i wrote them.
I want to ask those who see Glojo’s reposts or already follow them on social media, to NOT like/follow reposters or give them views. Please encourage the content creator and not the thief. We know it can be difficult sometimes to recognize an account as a reposter, and that net etiquette about reposting and ”resharing” isn’t immediately clear to everyone browsing social media, which is why we’re alerting people about this particular case, and spreading the word to other graphics makers who have been affected.
If you respect content creators who provide you with fanart and gifs for your favorite fandom, if you appreciate the love and dedication and energy they put into their work, and don’t want them to lose interest in giffing (a skill that takes time to practice and learn, and a process that is longer and far more involved than non-gif makers tend to believe), do not encourage people like Glojo into stealing more because it is very upsetting. As a member of @startrekladies I had a hard time going back on posting there because a lot of Glojo’s stolen works originate from said blog or got reblogged by it. More than that, Glojo went through my old blog @spockemon and reposted 50+ edits and gifs, and even my Doctor Who gifs (original), and that’s just what I found from browsing their instagram a little, pretty sure if i scroll down to the end i could find more :/ which is very upsetting.
They reposted not only Star Trek gifs/edits, but also Doctor Who, Farscape, Stargate and Star Wars gifs.
We do hope that if they repost more they will give a credit to original creator, but as someone whose gifs and edits were reposted a lot and even re-edited and watermarked by glojo, i prefer them to not repost my works at all. Even if it is just a small screencap edit, I still put my time and effort into it and using it as a base for their work and even claiming as theirs is disrespectful.  The worst is - Glojo is not the only one who does this, there are more accounts stealing works from creators and getting praise for it, never mentioning that it is not their work. That is why my recent gifs are all watermarked. I put in my about page that if someone reposts my works outside tumblr at least give me credit, linking back to my tumblr, that is not much to ask and all the time I ask for the credit I get rude answers and get blocked. or no answer at all :/ I hope you will have better luck with it.
Feel free to reblog this post to help us spread the word, thank you! If your gifs have been reposted and you wish for them to be deleted, we suggest you either contact Glojo on their social media and politely request a removal (please, DO NOT harass or attack them!), or report the reposts to Twitter/Instagram.
Thank you very much for reading!
The following are gif makers’ names and examples of their gif sets that have been reposted on Glojo’s Instagram and/or Twitter that we can recognize. Please note this is just a small sampling of gifs Glojo has taken from each gif maker, there are many more, just like there are numerous other gif makers not covered on the list! (if you want to be removed from the list, contact me)
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jamesdazell · 4 years
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Happy New Year 2020
Happy New Year. I hope this year brings more love and less hate. More peace and less pain. More kindness and less jealousy. More self-love and less comparison. A time to embrace new beginnings and wave goodbye to toxic times.
I
I posted one thing to Instagram last year. I had a really productive year and it was so full of growth in every important way to me. You cant Instagram that. It's something within you. You dont photograph it; you recognise it by a change of behaviour and outlook. Everything else in a year to year comparison is acquisition, age, or a change of scenery. I'm more excited and fulfilled by the experiences of personal growth and major changes of perspective than a drive for success in a career reshaping myself after the ideal habits and image that would more undo me than make me. I have no interest in a success wherein at the end of the journey I wouldn’t know myself, nor enjoy the company I shared. Success at all costs, is not very interesting. At the moment, if I were a successful writer by exactly what I wish to do.. who would I sit with when I got there? No. I won’t become published. There is more to success than pulling yourself up by the bootstraps and rolling up your sleeves. That’s a straight white male Christian’s romantic rhetoric. who gave themselves a free passport to show up anywhere and set up an imitation of success back in Europe. Nothing betrays the reality of white male priveledge like success and failure as an act of one's own will or quality of mind.  In reality, there are circumstances and situations to take in to account. Success in the end is a kind of assimiliation; a manner of fitting in, and imitating the model of success. One finds the same thing succeeds in the same place time and time again, with subtle novelty to make it seem new. But on deeper analysis, there are places where certain achievements never occur at all, even in the richest conditions, because it wasn’t the nature of the place; it's not to their particular temprament or personal contstitution. One is successful because they lend power to already existing success. They are useful to power or that which desires it.
My existence fulfills me, more than the world’s idea. Life and all its difficulties and lessons, learning how to become a better and a more contented me. In a way my life is a series of finding ways of preserving myself and not being shaped after the pressures of life or adapting after the world's image and excitement, because I've always known who I am and what I'm about. But it does become hard to preserve and to affirm oneself in the ever changing world with its innovations that change the very farbic of society. There is always a need to find my defensive and offensive strategies to preserve and affirm myself in the face of the world. And my interests and passions - though this may be true of everybody - are ways of retaining, maintaining, and developing the best parts of myself, without giving them up for popular fads that rise and fall. Learning about myself, the world, and what everything is really about. Finding my own drama, meaning, goals, and adventure of life on my own terms, out of my own experiences, not those shoved into me from media and social pressure. How could I Instagram that. The moment I post a moment I am happy with is the moment I doubt my happiness and put my memory up for public validation. No. I validate myself and I validate my own experiences and memorable moments. I dont need to know how much something is likeable: I have liked it. I dont need to know how agreeable a thought is: I have thought it. I dont need to know how achieved an act is: I have done it. I dont need to know how good this is: I am proud of it.
I envy the blind person who has no use for the narcissism of Instagram, is spared of the passive agressive anxiety and pessimism on Twitter, and still appreciates life for all the things truly worth appreciating. Whose appreciation for life cannot be photographed, and does not know the dopamine addiction for a validation 'like' counter to compensate their low self-esteem. Social media is a petri dish for narcissism. And every woke person is a basket case with the same narcissistic anxiety as everyone else on it hoping to be validated and gain followers for their wokeness. Narcissists crave validation. Disable them by disengaging. Narcissists are made not born. They are overindulged in validation and underindulged in emtional connection. They dont reflect. They socialise to have conversations about their problems in order to be forgiven and receive consoling kind words about themselves, and pretend they dealt with it. Because all narcissists want is validation. And it’s the epidemic of our time.
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Our self-impression of ourselves we upload onto (anti-)social media, is not nearly as interesting and attractive, as the details, humour, idiosyncracies we are unaware of, because it's not interesting when we try to impress - especially by such superficial things, most of which aren't even things to do with ourselves, but places we arrive to and things we acquire. Images of ourselves without context, a macroscopic gaze devoid of the energy and life of its context: namely, existence. All the things that make up the rest of the picture that a healthy perception takes into account. It rubs away so much of a human being that they are left little more than a skin surface. It makes us into journalists of our own lives (except not reviewers), and advertisers of everything we don't need.
I understand I could use social media to gain success in my aims, but I dont want to become what that entails in the process nor want a success that would depend on other people being on these platforms to grant me it. Work hard and succeed quietly, making your work your achievement. Do good deeds in silence. Don't do it to then post on social media because you still need the excess validation. Do it because it was a good thing to do. Absolving your mistakes by your own conscience is the long road round of not caring about that you made them all. If its not forgiveness by a change of behaviour, or attitude then nothing has been learned and nothing changed.
Dont just travel to places. Make memories there. Theres nothing impressive about boarding a commercial plane and showing up where it lands. What else was expected. If there was no growth or contribution there, were you even there. Just passing through like an invisible wind. Lifestyles are for people with no real meaning in their life. It's a way to fill the void of daily meaninglessnes that they have to stylise their life. It used to be that there were things unnecessary to buy. Now it is things unnecessary to know. You must know? What for? Knowledge without purpose is decadence. Keep to your lane. If it's youre job to know, then know and do your job. One voice of reason well articulated can silence a room of idiots. Thats how the world works. On social media, the idiots gain ascendancy by liking each others idiocy 10k skyward. Power is reversed online.
Once you no longer care for the validation and public reception, and once you realise that politically social media is ineffectual to substantial change - snce it's effectively a right wing publishing model with every ounce of sense falling off the algorithm - it's just watching the world go to hell one post at a time. And that to thrive on it is to assimilate with its ideal: a narcissist. A juvenile superficial arena of naval gazing dopamine addicts. Everything else on it is somewhere between a complaint box, click bait, and ‘food-food advertising.’ Then there feels no point to it regarding your health and self-esteem. Filling your mind, your eyes, with things which were not present a moment ago, which may have stirred and disturbed you for a much longer time. It's made by and for narcissists to peak dopamine hits.
Dopamine acts as a neurotransmitter made by different parts of the brain that is part of our evolutionary chemicals that gave us the drive to do things that were positive for our survival. The chemical that made our brain drive us to eat when hungry, find warmth and shelter when cold, to reproduce our genes to survive, now that same reward chemical in the brain floods in excess. Your brain wants the dopamine not the thing. Its the motivation chemical. We need it. We evolved by it. It keeps us positive by controlling memory, focus, attention, motivation. Without can cause lack of focus, restlessness and irritability, erractic impulsive bodily movement, and indecision. And prologned deficiency due to the excess of it swell and depletion it, cause stress, anxiety, depression to ensue.
We live in a dopamine driven culture. We sell this idea that drugs are enhancing. Drugs are not enhancing at all. It's evident that no feeling of reward from alcohol, smoking, cocaine, heroin, cannabis, meth, other pain relief and psychoactive drugs, etc is giving you anything that your body wasnt already giving you, and if anything those substances only reduce the same chemical that is desired to attain by one using them. And naturally this deficiency therefore leads to dependency and addiction, because the person thinks these substances are where they got them and how they got a boost of them. When actually they use them up and it takes a couple of weeks to restore to normal regulation which is why people go back to substances, then bulld up a tolerance and need more. Tolerance is actually your body's natural adaptation trying to regulate your body to new circumstances. Tolerance isn’t you handling the substance more. It’s a natural adaptive response that the body undergoes to re-regulate, to counter-act the effect of alcohol and drugs. Your body thinks it’s sick and adapts to the change. That’s why you get drunk faster if you drink less frequently than if you drink regularly long-term. It’s like resetting the zero point on weighing scales manually. So, a drinker will need more to tip the tolerance, because your body reset ‘a-lot-more-alcohol’ to the new zero point. The reason a person gets drunk less quickly after drinking regularly is because the body reduces its GABA inhibitiors and increases the exciters, because the effect of the alochol had been increasing the GABA inhibitiors and reducing the exciters. But the alcoholic wants the GABA inhibitors because the dopamine has now associated it with the reward chemical, and so drink more to tip the balance in favour of the GABA inhibitors because they get the “good feeling.”All which the body would have given you anyway. Whats more, is that its the same of one-click online shopping, advertising, high sugar food and drink, high carbs, junk food, binge watching TV, image scrolling sites, porn, dating apps, and social media. As well as anything that increases stress, because it depletes dopamine, which results in further stress, anxiety, attention deficit disorder, depression. Our cultural lifestyle is dopamine addiction. But it’s effect is the reverse. It’s self-depricating and makes us less ambitious because dopamine is needed for motivation. The only thing that adds extra boost of reward chemical of dopamine, endogenous opioid, serotonin, and endogenous cannabinoid, is by eating healthy food, getting sufficient sleep, and getting regular and intense aerobic exercise, and some stretching/strength building. The healthier we are, the more powerful and stronger we feel, the motivated and ambitious we are, the more daring and inspired, the happier and more tolerant of things that would otherwise stress. We are a better human being for it. Big business exploiting our evolutionary chemicals to keep us addicted to unnecessary lifestyles, media, and products. And because it takes a week or more to replenish naturally, an addiction cycle to quick fix substances occur. It used to be that a person should just not do drugs, but now its a whole lifestyle that should be avoided.
Our most legal drugs are the worst. Alochol and cigarettes have more death related incidents than illegal substances. 5 minutes of doing nothing is better for your brain than 5 minutes of social media. You improve your brain and subsequently your body, having the same feel good pain relieving chemicals that are desired,  and subsequently the power over your environment and subsequently your life by doing nothing, compared to engaging with most of culture available.
Here is a video explaining drug addiction and dopamine (same applies to carbs, sugar, fast food, junk food, and other quick fix dopamine reward high)
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NxHNxmJv2bQ&t=2s
The reason is people want the inhibitors. Even though its not giving them anything that their body wouldnt give for free. Its wiring the brain to respond to stress, suffering, and pain. Drugs alleviate pressure. But whether for pleasure or for stress, it’s a response to a situation. It’s not the danger of drugs that matter to me. It's a mental health issue. But your body gives you what it needs, and drives you to get what it needs. If you would only allow it to do its job. You want to make life lighter. But in reality all real things are heavy. The pressure of life ought to stimulate a response that demands more health and more strength. The body wants to give you more health and strength. The very feeling of struggle in life, psychological feeling, and at times physical strife, is your body signalling to you that you need a higher health and strength. In strife, the body fights or flight. In other words, innately decides if it behaves decadently or towards health; existentially or ecstatically. The proper reaction to pressure is to be stronger, the reaction to signals of low moods is be healthier, the reaction to de-motivation is to eat dopamine increasing foods, get exercise, sunshine, and sleep; the proper reaction to insecurity is do something daring that would require confidence. “To have strength, one must first need it” Nietzsche. It’s a resilience and strength of mind that has to be trained. Drugs don’t alleviate depression, they perpetuate it, by never solving the problem. They decrease the feel good chemical in the brain that would have pulled the person out of depression. That’s what rehab centres are really doing, they are taking the person out of the habits that are disrupting the body’s natural chemical regulation. The body has to rewire itself to desire healthier habits, feel good, and motivation. The pressures of life are life demanding you to be more and you have to go meet it. That's just the game of being a functioning human being.
You are getting the feel good drugs all the time. You are actually depleating your body of things which it thinks it wants. You get those chemical in such a surge that they create deficiency. You think its an uplifting buzz. You're getting a buzz from things that wont improve your life when your body is trying to give those chemical to you to motivate you for things that will. Knowledge is not power. Health is power.
Drugs just block stuff. It doesnt give. It just blocks so that your body supplies more of what it already has because it thinks it cant provide. This deprives people of realising the native vigour of their human potential. Whats needed to realise the ecstatic nature of a human being has always been Great Health. There are however obvious remedies, none of which define post modern culture if you bring them all together. Getting plenty of sleep, exercise, sunshine, socialise better, have healthier and uplifting hobbies, read, draw, learn an instrument, learn often, eating certain dopamine increasing foods, less carbs, less meat, less sugar, less coffee, less alcohol etc less of everything that is post-modern American culture. Read more, great things, with charisma and intelligence, with depth and meaning, things beautifully written and timeless. Listen to music that reaches into you and excites as much as it calms, a catharsis of emotion that needed to be recognised and explored. Visual art that belongs to great times, and not artists who think their pain is worth your attention. A culture that brings out the best of you. The best mind. The best health. The best company to be around. The best aspirations for yourself. The best diet and lifestyle. It’s an interesting time because it feels to go with the flow is the worst thing to do, not only boring, but bad health. And to experiment with exploring your own direction is essential. Find yourself in your own culture you invent. Design your own culture. Experiment with everything and explore what brings out you the most at your best.
Our genetic code is like a piano. It has all the notes laid out. But it makes proteins, and it decides which to make based on responses to situations and experiences, that is epigenetics. So it's like your genetic code is a piano, all the available notes laid out, and epigenetics is like the music being played on it. Choosing which of the available notes to use when in response to situations and experiences. We live by the piano made by generations of our ancestors. Each one of us trying to play new beautiful music to pass on.
Foods that help increase dopamine are fish for omega 3, oregano and oregano oils, probiotic foods that help absorb amino acids to make dopamine, green tea (as it helps electrical signals to move around the brain), tumeric (easy way is to add it to rice or pasta) which lowers inflammation in the brain allowing for more dopamine release, high magnesium foods like pumpkin, beetroot, spinach (this also helps for good sleep), blueberries, everyday vegetables like broccoli, tomatoes, garlic, asparagus. Plus good for boosting serotonin are walnuts pistachios, lactose free milk. For both, have avocados, and eggs.
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This is not to denounce hedonism and Epicureanism. On the contrary give me all the Saturnalia  Lupercalia  Bacchanal you like, the more ecstatic culture the better. Music and dance are the only arts of the twentieth century that got anywhere toward the ancient ecstatic culture. And because it looked beyond European tradition to world cultures, on other continents like Africa and Asia. But this trans-Altantic post-Modern culture is just decadent self deprecation. Naturally, spawned by Christian cultures, which favoured transcendence from everything bodily. And has always had an aversion to power and strength. which the body is trying to supply but we keep kicking it away for cheap fixes. Principle causes for a love of Minoan-Mycenean-Greco-Roman cultures, utterly in contradiction to Abrahamic faiths. Not Ancient and Modern. Polytheism versus Monotheism as a whole frame of mind. Ecstatic versus Existential. Greco-Roman vs Abrahamism.  I don’t want to get rid of Abrahamism, but there are much  better alternatives healthier mind and body, from which emanates a whole  culture and art, indeed, civilizations.
There was a recent study of the healthiest countries in the world with the obvious result that the Mediterranean (listing Spain and Italy first and second) and Japan as the healthiest cultures. Of course, the traditions of their culture are entirely health driven. "a Mediterranean-style diet, which has been shown to reduce cardiovascular events, mostly stroke, compared with a Western diet. A Mediterranean diet includes generous quantities of olive oil, fruits, vegetables, nuts, whole grains, and fish; limited portions of red meats or processed meats; and moderate amounts of cheese and wine." explains Dr. Ron Blankstein, a cardiovascular imaging specialist and preventive cardiologist at Harvard-Harvard-affiliated Brigham and Women's Hospital.
Post-war America created post-modern society and the PR/advertising industry. Post-modernism, not only a juvenile variation of modernism, but a hijack of evolutionary biology. Everything innate to our nature stimulated into an excessive overkill, exploited in order to get us hooked on unnecessary media, lifestyles, and products. To be healthy is to be unAmerican, to be unPost-Modern. Everything introduced is psychologically detrimental. Walk around and try to find a place that isn’t junk food, gambling, alcohol, shopping, coffee.
The more capitol cities are the epicentre of post-modern culture as we 'move forward' into regression, I am lured away to less notable locations, that have been spared and still retain some health without artificial substance abuse just to keep afloat. Cities now brim full of juvenile yuppie narcissistic kidults on finance living like they’re still at university, and cultural funding dwindling as we’ve regressed back into the 1980s yuppie culture that made all the baby boomers rich. You can almost map the baby boomer life with the creation of post-modernism. The PR industry, nicotine, plastics, sugar, the colour television, LSD, ketamine, the 60s in their teens, the 70s love-in in their twenties, the 80s wealthy cocaine yuppies in their thirties, repackaging their youth to kids in the 90s, and ever since, and the masterplan that has been the 21st century of white nationalism they were raised on in their earliest memories in the 1950s. And what is “progressive” today is only what was progressive in the 60s almost as a left-wing conservativism because things have moved so far-right,
But it has become clear (as big business, big tech, fossil, and right wing gain ever more ascendency) that our knowing is ineffectual and only depresses us. "We absorb so much information that we've lost our common sense" Gertrude Stein once said. Politics has become worse since the advent of social media, not better. We don’t know more, but find those comments that argue our own opinion for us. People buy books, go to the theatre, to hear about things they already believe. Armchair activists are not as effectual as they think. And hardworking Foundations and Charities still exist. The richest of the rich only take care of things that concern them, and believe if the poor suffer enough they'll take care of themselves. The detriment of engaging with the platform, outweighs the good intentions of using it. And consequences are always more important than intentions. It's not important to know, if prudence and profoundness are lacking. 
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My life has its own universe, and social media inhibits that to the degree that I cannot see the situation of my own universe enough to do enough about it for its own sake. My existence is it's own universe. Make your world your passion. Better to do whatever makes you feel empowered and proactive and take care of your lane as much as you can. The more you listen to the news the more you live after it. You react to whats todays news and tomorrows and the next, forgetting your own personal power. Be disruptive as a child that is full of energy and aim not living after the world but their own happiness. The world must always find its arrangement. Where people find where they belong. Not fitting in to any success at all costs, but knowing who you are and what you are about and finding an environment which stimulates enriches their potential. What a life needs to thrive is not social comparison, but a mirror to reflect ourselves. that we enjoy ourselves, to make the positive changes necessary, and to be present within our own existence, with our own circumstances, working within its own sphere of influence.
Be the light and goodness in your own knowable and experiential world. Avoiding unnecessary information entering your mind that really serves no purpose but to inform you of things others are doing, or have, that is far beyond your sphere of influence, that wouldn't have entered your mind at all if you had not taken out your phone.
There is a real luxury: Living without concern for the conversation on social media and the news. Being present in your own existence. Not thinking about every corner of the globe, but what you can do where you are. Feeling your own life and being present within it, positively effecting things around and within your physical proximity.
🧘‍♀️🧘‍♂️🚶🏽‍♂️🚶‍♀️
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ministryofgamers · 6 years
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The FIX - Bren
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I’ve been doing YouTube for a LONG time now, well 8 years certainly sounds like a long time to me.. but eerily doesn’t feel like a long time. We’ve been through so many changes and trails, trying different things, making movies, TV shows, Interviews, Press events... you name it, as a content creator for the video game community I’ve made it. I’ve always wanted to be a successful youtuber when it came to video-games, these days that usually means you have to figure out a silly name and play lots of games and make a fool of yourself (and yeah i’ve done that too). A youtube star is someone that has millions of followers, uploads daily, sometimes twice daily, but I have none of those things... does that mean i’m not successful? I dont’ think so. I’ve conducted interviews with lead game designers, been to top tier invite only press functions, had 2 shows on UK TV for video games, a movie, and run an active community driven youtube channel that has a great gathering of awesome people. So why is it that I feel like I’ve failed somehow? is it because I didn’t find the right audience? is it because I didn’t get launched to super stardom for my time as a games journalist... would I even want that if it came knocking... i’m not even sure I would like it to be honest. It's strange, I've always felt like I’ve wanted to be successful in making video content, films, art, always wanted to entertain and make something that would make someone say “wow” and I have done that, but on a small scale.
Now on Youtube I see things are very different, attention spans are miniscule, kids are starting channels left right and centre, no knowledge of how to frame a good shot, how to use a decent microphone, no knowledge on how to make a proper video... vertical videos of cats being dicks, fail videos, pranks, challenges, all of that stuff to me is benine crap,  redundant. I feel the same about reality TV and how most formats prey on schadenfreude( german phrase meaning "to take pleasure in anothers missfortune") I find it nausiating that television, for the most part, has become so mundane, fuelled by adverts and les than average production values. I recently watched a shocking piece of output form the BBC where they seem to have forgotten that sound levels are important... as well as whitebalance and did the OP forget his tripod? Hand held is ok, but this chap looked like he'd had a bit too much rum in his coffee that morning.  
Anyway, back to Youtube. I'm a part of a few "small youtuber" groups on facebook, basically if you don't have 500,000 subs these days you are considered to be pretty small time. And in these groups I see thousands of the same posts everyday "yay i got 20 subs" or "how many views do i need before i can monetize." and the best one "sub for sub anyone?" honestly pretty much everyone on those groups that i've looked at (except one or two) literally have no fucking idea what they are doing and couldn't make a video if it meant saving their own life. Time and time again I see the same shit, constantly. It honestly makes me Wince at the thought that these kids are about to embark on the most dissapointing crusade of thier lives.  I started youtube in 2009 and it was a bloody good time to do so as there were pretty much no such thing as lets plays or video game shows etc... we had an amazing show, 4 presenters, heavily edited reviews, sketches, comedy! And best of all we were in with the big boys, interviewing people I never thought i'd ever get to meet!  "But Bren, why didn't you just keep going with that?" Well, thats a whole different story and i'll just sum it up by saying there were differences of opinion and it fell apart.
Starting GameGazmTV was very freeing... I had decided that I needed a platform where I didn't care too much about what content I put on it... I had boxed up my camera equipment and used a phone to film most of the stuff for it... we slapped half naked manga girls all over it with flames and rock music in the hope that we would offend someone enough to just come and look at the channel... even the name "GameGazm" was fucking ridiculous. It wasn't long before we started to slowly change everything. Removing the semi naked girls, and some "dead weight" and started to clean up the brand... but it didn't do anything really.. I started to slip back into the "everything must be good" routine, so started heavily editing videos again, making bigger productions, adding more visual effects to everything... graphical updates, weekly updates, started doing let's plays for more content, live streams... then by year 4 we changed the name fully to Ministry of Gamers in the hope of finally shedding the GameGazm crappy beginnings. And now I've suddenly realised... that I hate most of it... I look back at a lot of our content and pretty much 90% of it I could throw in the bin and no one would bat an eyelid. The content I love the most on our channel is 2 videos... Solstice and Top Gun. 2 videos that I think are actually really worth watching... the rest of them i'm not that bothered about... but solstice and top gun both took 6 weeks each to make... thats a lot of time... and then the most successful video on our channel is a video about a fucking controller that we shot in an hour because we thought "why not" I couldn't give a crap about that controller... but its the only video that i've spent the least amount of time on and its the most successfull thing ive ever made.... talk about a kick in the teeth... thats some way to really get yourself down.
Up until this point if you asked me is YouTube worth doing, should I start a channel? I would have said " yeah its really fun to do, and totally worth it." but ask me right now? i'd say "no... don't do it.. its really not worth the stress you'll put yourself through, its not worth seeing comments like "shut up and stop reviewing games you fat cunt." on a video that you spent DAYS writing, recording, editing.  Its not worth making any video that takes you longer than an hour to do, because honestly... your effort is the last thing youtube gives a crap about." Youtube does not care if you stayed up for a week straight slaving over an edit, making sure your colours are good, sound is balanced, Youtube doesn't care if you spent days crafting a CGI intro for your channel, making custom graphics, building a brand! It DOESN'T CARE... but make a controller video, slap it up, and youtube will give you £300 and a pat on the head..... great... just film your cat doing something retarded and you'll be a millionaire in no time. don't worry about talent... its not required here.
Basically youtube isn't the kind of platform I would like to be on. But not being on Youtube is like saying "I don't want to be on the biggest viewing platform available." throughout my video carrer I've only ever really been interested in making content about videogames. It's my passion so what else would I do? I have a couple of thoughts about other avenues I could explore. But if I really cared about them then I would have been doing it already. No I still care about making content for videogames but now its time to change the focus... change the direction because something has to change... i'm no longer going to use youtube as a platform to give content thats about something else.. i'm going to make it about ME and my team as people, its not a show anymore. I want it to document OUR struggle, OUR journey through a project, how we as people are focused on making entertainment. Youtube doesn't need another gaming channel, it needs to hear about how crushingly difficult it is to get anywhere with content creation, and thats where I want to be now. I'll be working on something I really care about, and i'll provide updates to that on youtube.
I can't keep going the way I have been, a constant viscious circle of dissapointment and failiure, over and over. I'm done trying to fill a gap that just doesn't need to be filled. There are other ways I can use my time and thats the most precious thing to all of us.. becasue there really isnt' that much of it.
Why have I written this? I guess to just put it all down somehwere other than my head.. the more I write at the moment the more I feel it leaving me.. literally like ive turned a tap on and the water was filthy and its slowly starting to clear up. My main point to all of this though was to fully understand why i'm so successful at failing, I make incredible work that never gets anywhere and no one really cares that much about, but its still MY work, and even if only one person sees it and is entertained by it, then to me, i've won. So in closing, I am a youtuber, and a fucking successful one.  And no one really knows it...... yet, and of course i'll never give up, I firmly believe I have something to offer a wide audience, i'm not quite sure what that is yet, but I feel like its my mission to figure it out, I owe it to myself to keep trying! and always give my best. Take pride in what you do, and if you believe in something enough, you will get it... after a long bitter road of absolute mental turmoil.... you'll get it.
Bren.
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roaldseth · 7 years
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Dankovsky (patho) or/and Gale (dds)!
You said “/and” and I am taking thatopportunity.
DANKOVSKY:
Why I like them
Second-handfavoritism—from you. Sometimes I like characters because of other people thatlike whatever said character. Psych myself up for something, I will attach toit. And I like his appearance. He has an appealing design, and I have to saythat characters describing him as corpse-like in passing sometimes ispersonally appealing.
Why I don’t
… well,he is kind of an asshole. Realistically, I wouldn’t bother with people likethat, but in terms of character traits it makes him interesting.
Favoritescene
TheMarble Nest as a whole. The cycle storytelling is very appropriate in terms ofthe endings that can be chosen, and the fact that there’s essentially no way to“win.” It’s a lot of traveling around aimlessly that gives an air ofhopelessness, whether you complete or botch the quests, you can’t reach thecharacter’s ultimate goal, but you can get yours as a player.
Favorite line
Wouldn’tsay it’s “favorite,” but the only thing I can readily think of atthe moment is: “what’s in you pockets, pumpkin?” Or at least I think that’swhat he says when you want to barter with small female children.
Itseems like one of the few times he’s actually “welcoming,” kind of likeGordon Ramsay when he talks to children versus talking to people that thinkthey know what they’re doing. I imagine him squatting down or kneeling or something to met the girls’ levels when saying it.
Favoriteoutfit
Newremake outfit > original outfit.
… hedid have those platform boots in his original art…
OTP
Burakh/Dankovsky
I willadmit that I entered the Pathologic fandom—if that’s what you can call it—allsorts of backwards. I’ve read fanfiction before actually “experiencing” thegame, and if fanfiction has ever made me ship a ship, it’s with these two. (Ihaven’t braved google translate, but) they way people write them like somesnarky (vaguely domesticated) couple is something I can get behind.
brOTP
I don’tknow. Dankovsky and Isidor or Rubin? They were colleagues, right? Or Andrey for That One Time In College feeling?
HeadCanon
Unsure.
Unpopularopinion
Also unsure.
A wish
maythe remake be release by the end of the year.
Consideringit’s impossible for him to escape his fate: may healways have a good bed to sleep on, enough food to not starve, and an abundanceof smowders and ammunition.
Anoh-god-please-dont-ever-happen
Honestly,I’m not quite sure. I haven’t given it enough thought. I mean: the man’sdealing with a plague. His life can’t get much worse.
5 wordsto best describe them
100%done with everyone’s shit?
Or:Steadfast, analytical, irritable, influential, and tired.
Mynickname for them
If I’m trying to becheeky, I’ll refer to him as Dr. Dank or Dan/Daniel, but most of the time Itake the time to say/type out “Dankovsky” or use the common diminutive “Danko.”
GALE:
Why I like them
I like his logic and level-headedness. He’s the one to suggest something out of probability, butwill place his tactics in gambits—quick to adjust and assess for situation andwhat’s called for.  He’s onlyan advisor, but will take action if deemed appropriate.
Not to mention he’s brain AND brawn. Hisbiceps give me vitality.
Perhaps there’s also a fondness for him “notcomprehend[ing]”—that he has to put a little bit more effort to awakeningto/understanding emotions. It’s a sense of (wanting to see) accomplishments andgrowth, I suppose. When everyone else around you seems to be achievingimportant life goals/markers, and you just can’t or at such a slower pace thatit get’s discouraging. But, in the end, Gale does get emotions, and it’s all themore satisfying seeing them.
Why I don’t
Not applicable. Everyone loves Gale.
Favoritescene
TheChurch’s forced interrupt in chapter 3 of Quantum Devil Saga.
It’s aninstance of vulnerability that does not really get translated within DigitalDevil Saga. The novel takes the time to point out that Bishops’ “headspaces”are very important, fragile pieces of a tribe. It invokes a feeling of pity and“feeling sorry for” this near non-human(ly described) character being subjectedto the higher power. The description given clearly displays Gale is in pain,but Serph’s calm, articulate reaction gives off the impression that it issomething that has happened before. Of course, Serph doesn’t take lightly tothis. And once everything is all said and done, Gale just comes back/wakes uplike it was no big deal, shrugging it off saying it was his duty.
Favoriteline
The firstthing that had come to mind was: “We have the advantage. Proceed.”
To me,there was nothing quite like going into a battle and hearing that being spoken.It’s done so distinctly casual. No second thoughts. No smugness. Just stated. If I wasan enemy and heard that, it would’ve probably made me very uncomfortable.
Andit’s also this distinction of approval.
Favoriteoutfit
DDS uniform > QDS uniform
I prefer the grey to the navy because it gives off more of amysterious, undefined existences, rigid, static, techno dystopian air. And the hood shiftsto a way more appealing design, in my opinion. I don’t understand the “windows”(but I will admit I do prefer it being closed), and the earpieces (that I don’treally know what to call if it even has a name) looks like it’s designed forsomething audio/sound related in DDS, and it’s not really defined/hard to interpret in QDS.
Plus, itdoesn’t look like DDS Gale is hiding a mullet under that hood.
OTP
I’llship him with Lupa, I’ll ship him with Angel.
brOTP
Galeand Cielo, Gale and Serph; might as well toss Gale and Roland in there, too, as a concept/could-have-been dynamic.
HeadCanon
It’smore of a theory than headcanaon, and a rather extensive one, but simplified:David knew Greg—that they were colleagues in the International EnvironmentalStabilization Committee—and that’s why Gale reacted strongly in relations toLupa.
Unpopularopinion
Not really an unpopular opinion, but more of a point to be made.
I remember readingthreads and post from younger days of this fandom that generally grouped theLokapala into being a “terrorist group” or the one’s acting in some sort ofextremist way, but Gale is the one shown to have reacted to fear and terror asa resource.
When Gale is the playable character, Roland points this out saying: “I suppose you could scare civilians and then use their confusion as a tactical diversion… That’s what you were going for, right Gale?” 
Argilla suggests that Gale might actually be amused by their panic when saying: “I’m starting to feel sorry for them… Don’t tell me you’re enjoying it.” 
Gale is not a terrorist. He did not initiate the action that caused the panic and confusion, nor was the source—god retracting data from the earth—political or ideological or anything of that ilk, but it’s interesting for him using what is around him with that in mind. Not to mention the scarcity we see of his counterpart, David Gale, is during the aftermath of a terrorist attack against the Cuvier Syndrome Isolation Ward.
A wish
That Lupa was also reincarnated, and Gale was able to befriend him in thatlife as well. That’d be nice.
Anoh-god-please-dont-ever-happen
Unfortunately,I can’t think of an answer for this, not that I would want something terribleto happen, I just can’t think of anything.
5 wordsto best describe them
tactical,astute, intelligent, loyal, and… tall(?)… he’s pretty tall…
Mynickname for them
I was going to say that I don’t have any, but then Iremembered That One Time I tried to get a friend to play Digital Devil Saga andhe can’t remember any of the character’s names to save his life. If I refer to him to asanything other than “Green DJ” or “Venus Fly Trap” he probably won’t know whomI’m referring to…
I don’t know, he thought he looked like some futuristic punkDJ, I guess.
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