#why do i torture myself like this | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

netherregionblog · 7 months

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Mfs be like: “They’re my comfort ships ☺️”

The ‘comfort’ ships in question:

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deadhermiteyes · 7 months

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he is so hard to draw but i love him

#mike ehrmantraut #breaking bad #better call saul #my art #bald people are impossible to draw #plus i draw too small #why do i torture myself like this

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confoundedpangolin · 9 months

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WHAT. WHAT IS HAPPENING. JÜRGEN LEITNER JUST FUCKING APPEARED, INFODUMPED ON JON, AND GOT MURDERED BY ELIAS. ELIAS IS A BITCH, WHAT IS HE DOING, DEFEATING PRIMORDIAL ENTITIES WITH FUCKING BUDGET CUTS? HOW IS JON ALIVE? TIM AND MARTIN WHAT? HOW DID THEY GET OUT OF THE HALLWAY DIMENSION THING? I just finished the finale, allow me to gather my thoughts. Jürgen Leitner's description of the destruction of his library, that sounded like a bunch of different entities all together, and how does he move walls with books? And Martin and Tim went to the hallway dimension thing but got out? What is happening with Micheal? The spiral? And Jon has a... patron entity? Fucking puppet master of the Archives? And Gertrude was going to burn the whole damn thing down before ELIAS the MOTHERFUCKER decide to MURDER HER and now all the knowledge is lost and Tim and Martin have no idea what's happening and think Jon killed Jürgen Leitner, Jon is presumably trapped on the tunnels and ELIAS is supernatural? My only solace is that I can watch the next one immediately, if I had to wait after that fucking cliffhanger I might've just given up living, also Jürgen Leitner can dispel entities and stuff but he's dead now like the table and holy shit those three don't have any ideas what's coming and neither do I. Imagine getting a fate worse than death to a fucking meat god. Ohhh season three I can't stop now I don't think I could even if I wanted to

#tma #just a thought #the magnus archives #magnus archives #jonathan sims #tma jon #tma podcast #tma spoilers #tma season two #tma season two finale #I just can't deal with this #why do i torture myself like this #well well back to the confusion gang #tim and martin so clueless about this and reluctant to trust jon #really dug yourself a grave there bud

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companion-showdown · 3 months

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Who is your favourite companion?

ROUND 2 MASTERPOST

propaganda under the cut

Jo Grant

i love her so much, shes so incredibly kind and always wears the best outfits, also her relationship with the master is the best thing about classic who (anonymous)

Truly WHO is out here doing it like her? Finagled her way into a UNIT job (she said she TOOK an A-level in science, she didn’t say she PASSED it …) exactly as effectively and sneakily as she managed to finagle her way into BOTH the Doctor and Master’s hearts. Their shared custody daughter who is single-handedly parent trapping them back together. Does all of this while looking completely fabulous and wearing go-go boots. Casually a better escape artist than Houdini; teaches herself to overcome the Master’s brainwashing with a “what, like it’s hard?” attitude. Out there conscientiously filling in everyone’s horoscopes for them because SOMEONE needs to stay on top of these things. Adorable, hilarious, and kind. (anonymous)

The Brigadier

doctor who's most prolific companion and father of her darling child, the unit dating contorversy (the one about years, not what they were getting up to behind closed doors) (anonymous)

#why do i torture myself like this #showdown 2k24: round 2 #well i guess at least i get to force everyone else to make these decisions too

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beyondthesefourwalls · 1 year

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alli!! bestie!!

I submit this to you on a silver platter: rooster + angst + picture frame + "just breathe"

kisses!!

This one hurt a little (a lot). I'm so not sorry.

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warnings: angsty angst.

California King

His bed felt too big.

It had always been a source of comfort for him, before. It was where the two of you could escape the rest of the world. You’d spend your mornings burrowed under the blankets, legs tangled together as you woke, and your nights tangled in the sheets as your bodies came together. It was a place just for you together. No bad could touch you here.

But you were gone now, and the empty space beside him that you always used to fill felt like an ocean with a rising tide.

Sitting on the edge of the bed, his hands braced on the mattress at his sides, Bradley could feel the tightening starting in his chest, the anxiety creeping its way up his spine to wrap around his throat in the way that had become familiar in the last two weeks.

“Just breathe,” he whispered to himself. His voice was raspy from disuse. He hadn’t had the energy to speak to anyone, despite their best efforts. Not when the only one he wanted to talk to was out of his reach now. “Just breathe, just breathe.”

His coaching was helping, if even just a little bit. He thought maybe he’d get through this episode without slipping into a full blown panic attack. But then he looked up, and his red rimmed caught sight of the picture frame he still kept on his side of the bed. Your smiling face stared back at him. You looked so happy there, so carefree and so in love, and he was just the same with his arm wrapped around your shoulder like it belonged there. Because you were, and because it did.

He picked up the 4x6 wooden frame, tracing a shaking finger over your face. As tears welled up and slipped down his cheeks, he wondered when things had changed, and how things could possibly ever be okay again.

word count: 320

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#alli's tgm blurb party #alli's tgm mix and match blurb party #alli writes #bradley bradshaw x reader #bradley rooster bradshaw #bradley bradshaw fic #Bradley bradshaw blurb #why do i torture myself like this #rooster x reader

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josephquinnswhore · 1 year

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We’re Done

🌂-angst

Pairing: Eddie Munson X Fem! Reader

Summary: All you and Eddie do is fight and you're sick of it, you make the heartbreaking choice to breakup.

Word Count: 1.5k

Content Warning: emotional/financial abuse, some bullying & degrading, overall toxic relationship, reader had shit childhood.

You knew today would be shit. You were already in a sour mood from constant fights over the weekend with Eddie that left a foul taste in your mouth. All but apologies were spoken, empty threats and harsh words left hanging in the air had your body radiating heat like an overused furnace.

You’d forgotten to fold some laundry, getting distracted by the already multiple tasks you’d forgotten you’d stashed to the bottom of your bag from Math class, you had left it till the last minute as math was your Achilles heel so to speak. So, there you were from 4pm to 8pm struggling to complete the booklet through Eddie’s lecture.

“I work 10 hours a day y/n. You’re lucky we don’t have guests, look at the state of this house. What do you do all day?”

Eddie had dropped out of school, by the grace of God himself & then some he managed to land a job as a mechanics apprentice. It didn’t pay the biggest coin, nonetheless Eddie had managed to put down the deposit on a small 2-bedroom house just out of town. It came to be something you despised of him though, as it was a fundamental bullet, he liked to keep in his back pocket to shoot you with whenever he got the chance.

“You know I’m fucking studying Eddie! I’m actually trying to graduate so I can have a reliable career.”

You had a few stray weekends of babysitting and waitressing at a cafe, but you knew out of Hawkins employers were looking for permanent full time childcare workers. That had been your dream since you could remember. You had always gotten along with kids and the thought always warmed your heart, watching them grow, reach milestones, pick them up when they fall and encourage them to try again, praise them for their achievements and teach them how to manage their emotions. It was your lifelong and career goal, which you didn’t need to attend university, fortunately for you that course had been available for off course studying. It was truly your passion and something you’d dream of spending a lifetime doing.

“You’re lucky you even have a house to live in away from your parents y/n! You’re so ungrateful I’m tired of it.”

You had a hard time growing up, your parents were critical and not as supportive as you needed them to be, there was some emotional and verbal abuse which made you a very shut off person. Which is why you refused to let the anger you felt for Eddie go, you had trusted him with something traumatizing and he used it against you. You were never taught to regulate your emotions and it’s why you completely blew up when you were angry, just an overwhelming feeling of someone blowing you up and you popping like a balloon, overcome with rage and irrationality. You would say everything and anything just to hurt him, all the while it felt like someone else was in control of your body and mind entirely.

Slamming the car door as you threw your bag onto the passenger's seat and practically threw yourself into the drivers, shaking the car violently from the motion. Tears threatened to fall from your lash line as they collected from the overwhelming amount of stress you were experiencing, you’d gotten a C- on your math test today, although it was a well enough grade to pass the class and graduate, you felt the frustration in yourself overcome you.

Tyres screeched along the pavement of the carpark as you drove off, towards yours and Eddie’s house. Your foot to the floor on the accelerator turned your usual route home of 15 minutes into an incredible 7 minutes and 35 seconds. You were amazed at the fact that you didn’t end up in a ditch somewhere or completely mangled on the road as you had dissociated while driving, not remembering leaving the school carpark at all. The gravel rocks on the driveway flew in every direction as you skid to a halt, swiftly exiting the car and abandoning your bag with that garbage fucking excuse of a test grade.

You turned the metal knob to your front door to see Eddie standing on the other side, his work clothes tossed to the side just centimeters from the dirty clothes hamper, mud-stained boots subbing off on the carpet, and wearing a face so furious you’d be scared of you weren’t so infuriated yourself. Confusion crept through you as you realized you hadn’t seen Eddie’s van as you pulled up.

“Where the fuck have you been y/n? I’ve been worried sick waiting for you to fucking come home!” He slammed the door behind you as you fall into the comfort of your couch, over this conversation already. You look to your watch as it read;

5:26pm. What the fuck.

“I’m home now so don’t start this Eddie, I’ve had a long day I don’t want to argue with you.”

You swear Eddie’s eyes had turned black at your comment, his iris and pupil becoming one black mass.

“YOU’VE HAD A LONG DAY? I had some fucking morons cut my brake lines because he didn’t want to pay for a service. I had to find a ride home after 10 hours of working my ass off, to come home to find you missing, dinner not ready and the house is a fucking mess!”

You swore you could almost feel the walls shaking and the floor vibrating as he yelled at you, his body towering over you as he stood but two feet from your position on the lounge, he was obviously bothered by the fact that you seemed so unbothered, which was the complete opposite of what you were feeling. Absolute rage. That part of you inside was begging and clawing to be released, that coping mechanism to hurt them before they hurt you.

“I don’t know what to say to you anymore y/n! I’m so done with it.”

Flick, just like that a switch inside you was turned on and there was no going back. Your chest heaving from the anger you’d pent up. You stood up from the lounge, only a foot away from Eddie looking up directly to his eyes, “you’re done? YOU??” A maniacal laugh left your lips which left Eddie confused.

“All you had to do was fucking graduate Eddie, you could’ve had a decent job instead of working 10 hours like absolute shit to rent a fucking house that has a leak in the roof from rain damage. But now we’re stuck in this stupid fucking town because of YOU. Because you’re to fucking stupid graduate,” you poke his chest angrily and take a step forward now you’re nose to nose with him. “All you do is fucking criticise everything I do, I’m the only girl in this town and probably within a 100mile radius that would even look in your direction, let alone try to start a fucking life with you. But not anymore Eddie, I’m fucking done. We’re done.”

Eddie’s face had fallen and turned a pale white, you could practically hear his heart shatter at your confession, but you were to overcome with negative emotion to care. You stormed out of your shared house, not caring that all of your belongings were still inside with your now ex-boyfriend.

You were about to pull your car door open when you were jerked backwards by what turned out to be Eddie’s hand around your wrist. You face him and your heart trembles, his eyes are already puffed and red, tears stained his face while fresh ones still ran, his bottom lip quivering.

“Please don’t go baby, I promise I’ll be better. I’ll do anything, you can’t go baby. I want to marry you,” his hand caressed your own that held you there and the other held the side of your face. “Sweetheart please, you’re my everything, I’ve lost everyone... my mum, I can’t lose you too.”

Your heart suddenly felt like it was made of concrete, your chest restricting making your heart race, you began to panic.

You shook his hands off, so you were free of his touch, he had lost all hope he hid in his eyes once you’d done so. “I can’t Eddie... I can’t just take all of the things I said back. It won’t be the same. I’m sorry. I love you Eds, but this won’t work.”

You quickly retreated into your car and drove off so he wouldn’t see your own tears, you felt your heart breaking as you saw him drop to the ground onto the gravel driveway as you drove off, his sobs could be heard along with your own as your whole body racked with guilt and heartache.

You drive mindlessly as you had nowhere to go and no possessions, Eddie was your home and without him you had nothing, you were nothing.

Maybe you should just disappear, you were done after all.

#eddie munson #stranger things #joseph quinn #angst #eddie munson x reader #eddie x reader #eddie x y/n #eddie munson angst #why do i torture myself like this

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osaemu · 9 months

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breakups ft. the bsd men ☁︎

osamu dazai, nakahara chuuya

a/n — i listen to too many breakup songs... anyways i personally hc that dazai has severe commitment issues and nothing anyone says will change my mind

also send me requests / thoughts! i'll take (almost) anything !! :)

dazai probably initiates the breakup.

you don't see it coming. one second, everything was fine. the next, he sends you a text saying nothing but "we have to talk". and when you meet him, all he says is "we should break up."

your eyes widen and it takes a second for his words to sink in. surely this was a joke - everything seemed normal between you two. but you knew that even dazai, an incessant tease, would never make a joke as cruel as this.

"...is something wrong?" you try to reach out to dazai, hoping he'll give you some sort of explanation for this. but he doesn't reply. and you know better than to press him for an answer.

dazai was never easy to read, and attempting to judge his emotions is next to impossible if his guard is up, like it is now. he won't even meet your eyes...

all he does is stand and rest a cold, steady hand on your shoulder. he quietly says "i'm sorry", and leaves.

you never do find out why he decided to break up with you out of the blue. maybe it was his ever demanding work. maybe he had another lover. who knows?

life goes on and dazai never contacts you again, and you don't try to either. but his sudden departure from your life is a mystery you would do anything to solve...

chuuya takes it well.

chances are you're ending things with him for some reason related to his job in the port mafia, and he understands that dating a mafioso isn't for everyone.

you look up and see that chuuya's eyes are sad, but he's doing his best not to show too much of it. "i understand," he says quietly.

he was a wonderful boyfriend and always treated you perfectly but you knew that his job always came first. the port mafia was his life, and you and him both knew that if it came down to you or his job, he'd have to choose the mafia.

chuuya smiles sadly and shakes his head. "maybe one day..." is all he says before you two go your separate ways.

right person, wrong time. maybe in another life, if chuuya never got into the darker side of yokohama, you two could've stayed together. but in this universe, it just couldn't work out.

after you're gone, chuuya goes home and drinks every night for two weeks. he misses you a lot, but he's not the type of person to stay hooked on an ex for too long. so as time goes on, he gradually stops thinking about you.

but there are a couple nights long after the breakup that he can't sleep, and he spends every one wondering if he should have begged you to stay.

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irlkpop · 1 month

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If anyone needs me.....I'll be building a thing from temu......

#why do i torture myself like this

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adeledrinkscoffee · 8 months

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JJK shibuya arc / volume 0 spoilers:

i believe gojo did curse geto in the end like he asked, and that’s the reason suguru was able to prevent kenjaku from using his body to harm satoru. some part of suguru is trapped in his own body as a curse, maybe not even a sentient special-grade curse, and decided to use all of the strength it had to protect satoru.

and now the thought of a first or second grade curse husk of suguru mindlessly repeating something to the effect of needing to protect satoru is making me want to scream into a pile of dirt.

if gojo has to kill this man’s body again AND exorcise what little of geto remains, i will not be recovering.

#jjk spoilers #jjk #jjk season two #jjk shibuya arc #satoru gojo #suguru geto #satosugu #eating dirt #screaming #staring at a wall #why do i torture myself like this #insert rickie montgomery song

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rocketboots564 · 2 months

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GUYS GUYS… so long story short I’ve been watching 9-1-1 for the first time, and I’m on season six.

In fact, I’m on EPISODE 10 OF SEASON SIX

I THOUGHT HE WAS GONNA BE OKAY!! HOLY SH#%T THE UNIVERSE CANT GIVE HIM A BREAK

That’s where that fucking gif came from I knew the MOMENT I saw it something bad was gonna happen this season

#9 1 1 fandom #911 fox #911 abc #9 1 1 buddie #evan buckley #eddie diaz #why do i torture myself like this #9 1 1 writers when I catch u

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corazon01 · 1 year

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They say a mothers love is unconditional, but I must hold my tongue

and do as you say

and hide my flaws

and hate everything I am to be accepted by the one who gave me life.

“I love you daughter.”

“Do you?”

“Unfortunately.”

#personal diary #poetry #sad poem #mommy issues #i’m so tired #im tryin my best #this is hard #i’m not perfect #why do you hate me #i’m so alone #family #odd one out #unconditional love #conditional love #why do i torture myself like this #i should shut up #why do i care #motherslove #family issues

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uglykingsquid · 7 months

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I did a little birthday painting for my friend of her as a Pokémon trainer! Her favorite Pokémon in gengar, personally I would call myself a trapinch stan but that might just mean I need to do one of these paintings for myself

#pokémon #gengar #pokesona #painting #i did this instead of sleeping #procrastinator #like majorly #it’s horrible #why do i torture myself like this #but it was fun #and i’m here for it #it turned out better than i expected #trainersona #trapinch #fav pokemon #I actually don’t care for gengar not to be controversial but gengar just isn’t my favorite

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jamietarttdodo · 8 months

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y’all i worked to hard on this to not share it with the world.

#jamie tartt #phil dunster #ted lasso #taylor swift #speak now #edit #sad #why do i torture myself like this

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black-suns-rim · 1 year

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Black Momba's reference sheet

GUYS, I finally got around to making Tumblr's yautja mama a ref sheet. It was definitely something that I've been needing to do cause I draw her all the time dhsksbrbqk.

As you can see, she definitely has a lot of scars which i always forget to draw on her.

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smad-lesbian · 1 year

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Sooooo, I made so angsty as fuck McDuke drabble and I'm sorry for this. Someone please take me to therapy.

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"Heather".

The name, so simple. How could such a name possess such pain and happiness, such love and hatred, such power, yet such worthlessness.

"Heather, please just look at me". Duke's words were choked out, her eyes lined with tears that threatened to fall, exposing how weak she felt, how weak she was.

Cold eyes stared at her, not uttering a single word. Mcnamara looked at her, not with love or sympathy, like she used to. But not with the hatred that would make the pain Duke's heart go away.

Why couldn't she just hate her, why couldn't she just speak words of hatred, laced with the promise to hurt and cut deep, like how Chandler's always did.

But Mac, sweet Mac that deserved so much more than this, stayed quiet. The hallway soon to be filled with students rushing in and out of class, not even looking at them, unless they saw they could exploit this, stayed deadly quiet.

Mac looked past Duke, almost as if she wasn't there.

The bell rang.

And Mac walked away.

A single tear fell to the floor.

#heathers #heather duke #heather mcnamara #mcduke #a n g s t #i regret everything #i regret nothing #someone help #why do i torture myself like this #Give over you tears #🫴 give me the tears #SmadWrites

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josephquinnswhore · 2 years

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Bloody Mess

Pairing: Eddie Munson X Fem! Reader

Summary: Eddie learns the hard way that porn isn't a good resource to try new things.

Word Count: 1.5k

Content Warning: pornography, knife play, blood play, allusions to sexual activity, sexual scene going wrong, panic attacks, switchblades.

When it came to the bedroom between you and Eddie, well it was like a routine, same sex every time, not that you would complain, Eddie was incredible in bed. Semi-vanilla sex that you had never left the bedroom, he considered himself a soft dom. He was attentive, sensual and absolutely incredible when it came to giving you pleasure, wanting you to receive as much pleasure as you could handle, encouraging you all the while that you could take it.

But much more sinister thoughts overcame his gentle nature when he could taste the blood coming from your lip where he had accidentally bitten down too hard. The soft moan that escaped your lips was barely audible, but he caught it, which made his body heat up as if he were on fire.

You watched from underneath Eddie as he licked his lips, tasting your blood on his lips, his smile faded and was quickly replaced with a smirk, his eyes turning a shade darker than his normal vibrant sun kissed brown eyes. You’d be lying if you said it didn’t make you nervous, your heartbeat was thumping in your chest, you could’ve sworn in that moment it would burst out of your ribcage and land on the bed beside you.

“We’re going to try something baby, is that’s alright with you.” His dark eyes scanned your face, he could see you were nervous, it made him all the more desperate to act out on his desires. You could only nod in agreement, afraid that your words would leave your lips broken and unheard.

“You remember our safe word baby, if you don’t want to keep going, I’ll stop.” A small smile plastered on your lips, even as heated and desire fueled as Eddie was right now, he continued to make you feel safe and comfortable.

Cherry.

That was your safe word. Eddie suggested it as he loved the scent of your cherry Chapstick you kept on hand, he said it reminded you of your first kiss, how every time his lips met your own a spark ignited in him, and he still felt butterflies. He roughly dragged his thumb against your lips which were slightly damp from said Chapstick, Eddie lifted his thumb to his lips and sucked the cherry flavored Chapstick off of his finger, his finger creating a popping sound as he pulled it from his mouth with a satisfied smirk to see you squirming underneath him.

Eddie’s hands grasped your shirt in his hands and with ease tore the fabric in half, revealing your bare skin, and much to his surprise and content without a bra. Your top half was bare to him, Eddie eyes you hungrily, not daring to take his eyes off the sight. His stare was intense enough to make you hide your face in the crook of your arm, suddenly wondering if what you were offering was good enough for him.

A squeal escaped your lips in shock as suddenly your arm was pried away from your face and both of your arms were held above your head with one of Eddie’s hands. The other unbuckling his belt and pulling it from out of the loops of his black jeans. He had tied your hands to the bedframe with such finesse and expertise you’d wondered if he had done this before, perhaps he had been adding some more adult magazines to his collection.

“Close your eyes for me baby.” You quickly complied, his newfound confidence was growing your need for him, becoming desperate to the point of trying to discreetly press your thighs together to get the slightest bit of friction between your legs. Unfortunately, it didn’t go unnoticed, Eddie had shifted into the position of him straddling you, his hardness left no thought to the imagination. A small moan escaped your lips, raising your hips upward, begging for him to do something to you, anything.

“Please Eddie... I-I need you.” Your voice came out a pathetic whisper and Eddie chuckled at your attempt to beg for him. He thought you were so beautiful, seeing you so desperate for him you felt the need to beg. He slid something over your face, and you felt a sudden heaviness over the top of your eyes to the bridge of your nose, a blindfold?

“You’ll have to be patient princess.” Eddie’s confidence was soaring, seeing you tied, bound and blindfolded, nearly deprived of all of your senses. Your body looked absolutely beautiful, submissive and giving your all to him, you were all his for the taking. Everything was going smoothly so far, so there was no indication of how badly things would end up, here’s when things took a turn for the worst.

Eddie reaches into his Jean pocket and dug out a blade, a switchblade more specifically, it was almost a staple part of his outfit. Everywhere he went he took it, always concealed in his pocket, but he figured it would come in use one day. Today was that day, he thought. In one of his adult magazines there was a page with the headline reading, “blood play, it’s in now!” He thought it looked absolutely incredible and knew he had to try for himself with his stunning girlfriend.

You felt a stinging sensation along your abdomen, and again. This happened twice more from the under breast to your belly button. The last sting made you flinch, suddenly jolting upwards at the painful sensation. A silent tear had left your eye when you’d come to realize how badly the last sensation had felt, that started the waterworks and there was no stopping them now, it really hurt.

“Cherry, cherry!!” You had choked out through a sob. Eddie immediately withdrew his body from yours and reached for the lamp switch. Guilt and panic set their course through his body as he witnessed what he’d done to you, to your perfect body. Your face tear stained underneath the bandanna he had used to blindfold you, quickly he slipped it off and untied you from the bed frame, throwing his belt far across the room. You struggled to sit upright, bearing the pain as Eddie helped you sit upright to face him, you hadn’t yet noticed the blood until you stood from the bed and felt the liquid trickle down your pelvis.

You foolishly assumed it could have been sweat, or candle wax, seeing the blood in your fingers after you’d ran your fingers across the wetness that covered your stomach freaked you out. All you could think was how could Eddie possibly do this to you, how was this something that aroused him. When in all truthfulness, when he saw what he did to you, he felt sick to his stomach.

“Run me a shower, please.” Your eyes refused to meet his and your voice was cracking due to the amount of crying you’ve done. His hands reached out to you as he stood but you retreated from him, taking a step back, your arms crossed against yourself to protect yourself. That action itself made Eddie flinch, he realized how badly he had fucked up, you were never going to forgive him, he assumed the worst and knew you’d leave him for this. Then the whole world would know Eddie Munson is a freak.

His hands grasp the knobs in the shower, mostly turning the hot water, exactly how you liked your shower. You’d entered the room so quietly it startled him; his eyes couldn’t meet yours, full of shame after once again seeing the damage he’d caused. He was feeling sick and absolutely revolted. He figured you’d want to be alone and shower before you left him for good, his eyes burning with tears as they ran down his cheeks freely. He didn’t care, he was about to lose everything because of some stupid shit he had seen in a porno magazine.

He was surprised when you caught his wrist before he left the bathroom, “Stay. Please. I need you to stay.” Your eyes finally met his as his neck snapped up at the sound of your voice. You stripped yourself of your remaining clothing and helped Eddie do the same. You guided him into the shower with you, he was hesitant, still in shock at your request. You closed the gap between your bodies and held him to you, feeling his body tense and heart thumping in his chest.

You realized in this moment; this had affected him just as equally as it did you. He needed your support, reassuring words as much as you did. “I know you won’t forgive me; you’re going to leave me. Everyone’s right y/n, I am a freak.”

Your hands cradled his face and made him look at you, really look at you, you were okay, and you were here for him. You wanted him and you weren’t leaving. “It’s not your fault Eddie, pornography is toxic, we have learnt from this and we’re moving on. You’re not a freak baby, I love you. I want you.” That was enough to send him spiraling, sobs broke through his mouth and his wet hair covered his face. He sunk to the shower floor, and you sat behind him, pulling his back into your chest to have him as close as possible. “We’ll stay here as long as we need baby. It’s just us, it’s always us.” Eddie knew he would stop contributing to the porn industry buy no longer purchasing those magazines. He had been given a second chance and he was not going to lose you.

#eddie munson x reader #eddie x reader #eddie munson #angst #stranger things #why do i torture myself like this #i'm sad #i love him #eddie munson angst

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