i have no horse in the kid ships on st bc i don’t care but i have to say, i do think that it makes more narrative sense at this point for el and mike to break up and for them to explore mike and will’s relationship. not even because i ship anything but just bc as el has so much trauma, she has been through so much and i feel like she just needs to learn to be a kid without a boyfriend and she needs therapy and to be with her dad again. 

and will needs to stop being sidelined and i think having his sexuality explored and his feelings for mike maybe being reciprocated would be very refreshing instead of having mike react poorly or something. i see so many people on twitter talking about mike and eleven having to get married and have kids and it’s like. they’re kids. and i love me some childhood friends to lovers and who knows who will end up with who but i think leaving it open ended on both ends while el and will promise not to let a boy get between them would be the most realistic and best writing choice? i dunno. 

i feel like this is true for all the ships ngl. i personally ship nancy and jonathan and i think their relationship is far better written than steve and nancy’s (though i love steve as much as the next tumblrina!) but them breaking up is like. it happens? 

the beastie <3

anyone else have multiple traumatic memories associated specifically with holidays/family vacations? because that is a topic I never see discussed in all the So You Had A Shitty Childhood, Now What? self-help books i've been reading. but for me, it was a significant thing. and the more i think about it the more it seems like this would be an (unfortunately) common experience. would be grateful to hear if this matches other peoples' experiences...

before you know about women, you hear that you do not need to love the man, just that you need to love him through his manhood. which is to say you have seen the future painted in lamb's blood over your eyes - how your mother shoots you a look about your father's inability to cook right. how your aunt holds her wineglass and says i'm gonna kill em. men, right! how your best friend bickers with her boyfriend, how she says i can't help it. i come back to him.

you learn: men are gonna cheat. men aren't going to listen when you're talking, because you're nagging. men think emotions are stupid. they think your life is vapid and your hobbies are embarrassing. men will slam things, but that's because men are allowed to be angry. if you get loud, you're hysterical. if a man gets loud - well, men are animals, men are dogs, men can't control their hands or their eyes or their bodies. they're going to make a snide comment about you in the locker room, about your body, about how you're so fucking annoying. you're going to give him kids, and he will give you the money for the kids, and you're going to be running the house 24/7 - but he gets to relax after a long day, because his job is stressful. the man is on stage, and is a comedian, and says "women!"

and you are supposed to love that. you are supposed to love men through how horrible they are to you - because that's what women do. that's what good women do. wife material. your father even told you once - it'll make sense when you're older. it was like staring down a very lonely tunnel.

it feels like something's caught in your throat, but it's all you know, so. it's okay that you see sex as a necessary tool, a sort of okay-enough ritual to keep him happy, even though he doesn't seem to care about happiness as-applied-to you. it is relationship upkeep. it is kissing him and smiling even though he didn't brush his teeth. it is getting on your knees and looking up and holding back a sigh because he barely holds you as you panic through the night. it's not like the sex is bad and you do like feeling wanted. and besides! he's a man! like... they're another species. you'll never be able to actually communicate, right. he isn't listening.

you just don't get it. you don't feel that sense of i'm gonna climb him like a tree. mostly it just feels fucking exhausting. you play the part perfectly. you smile and nod and are "effortlessly" charming. and it's fine! it's alright! you even love him, if you're looking. you could have good life, and a good family, and perfectly happy.

in the late night you google: am i broken. you google i'm not attracted to my husband. you google i get turned on by books but not by him. you google how to get better in bed.

the first time he yells at you, it almost feels like blankness. like - of course this is happening. this is always how it was going to end up. men get angry, and they yell, and you sit there in silence.

you mention it to your friend - just the once - while you're drunk. she shrugs and says it's like that with me too, i just try to forget and move on. men are always gonna hear what they want to. pick your battles and say sorry even though he's in the wrong. you play solitaire online for a month. you go to your therapist appointment and preach about how you're both so in love.

after all, you have a future to want. nobody lied about it - how many instagram posts say marriage is hard. say real love takes work. say we fight like cats and dogs but the best part is that we always make up. how many of your friends say happy anniversary to the best and worst thing to ever happen to me. if you really loved him - loved yourself too - you'd accept that men are just different from you.

the first time she kisses you, it's on a dare at a party. something large and terrifying whips through your body. you wake up sweating from dreams where her mouth is encrusted with pearls and you pick them off one by one with your teeth. fuck. you sit at the computer and your almost-finished game of sim city. you think about your potential perfect life and your potential future family. you google am i gay quiz with your little hands shaking.

you delete each letter slowly. you don't need to love him. you just need to keep going.

can't believe garak went from 'hope you have fun following my little breadcrumb trail of maybe-truths doctor it builds character ;)' at the beginning of the show to '*sigh* fuck it here's the whole loaf. the entire fucked up bakery of my soul. if you somehow still wanna have sex with me after this you know where I am, yours in infinite longing etc.' in a stitch in time. has anyone ever been so pathetically horrifically enduringly down bad as garak is for julian (laudatory)

"I never knew you were a hugger..."

"No body protects nature better than you, sweet Amy."

Whoa, he's bisexual! I didn't know that!

Bye bye Sebek, :]

(he didn’t stand a chance, poor guy :[  )

Things every Dick vs Tim Red Robin fallout gets wrong no matter who's side they take

1. They still loved each other

2. Dick went after Tim after Tim stormed out of the cave. He didn't just leave it at that

3. They didn't have 0 contact, Dick called Tim back to Gotham for Blackest Night. They weren't talking because Tim didn't want to talk

4. Alfred gave Damian the Robin costume initially without Dick's knowledge, and his first mission as Robin was saving Tim's life after he got beat up by Jason (again). He apparently left this mess for Dick to clean up, and I don't think anyone ever told Tim that's how Damian ended up with the mantle

5. Dick helped in the process of bringing Bruce back to the current time, Tim presented his evidence when he got home, and Dick checked it out and solved the time puzzle in Bruce's ancestral home. Tim didn't magically pop back with Bruce after doing everything by himself, it was a coordinated effort that involved the Justice League

6. Tim and Damian started to get along. Not during Red Robin, but during Batman: Gates of Gotham

7. They were both grieving, Dick just masked it better

8. Tim didn't feel like he could ask for help because he knew sounded insane (and was feeling/acting insane). He was doing one of those 'i push away everyone i love because i hate myself' things, which he also did to Steph (who he fired as Spoiler under god knows who's authority) and Cassie. Dick wasn't special in this treatment, and he can't force Tim to stay, so he trusted Tim's judgement and let him leave. It is a "Tim's a sad boy" comic, but he's also very much a part of causing his own problems

9. They still loved each other. They never stopped loving each other. They never hated one another. Both in this era asked the other "Do you trust me?" And the other replied "Yes" and did the thing they asked. *shakes everyone who's ever written about this* that's the whole point, it's about miscommunication, and being in a bad place, but having what you need where you started waiting for you the whole time

If somebody in your life offers to knit or crochet or, really, create anything for you, please be an active participant in the creation of the piece they are making. I adore making and gifting things, but nothing bums me out quicker than a person who passively just goes "okay," to my ideas about what I'm making them - it can send the message that they won't like it, or that they don't care, even if they're happy about my offering. The back-and-forth feedback is a great way to make sure that you are being gifted something that was truly worth the time, effort, expertise, and money that will inevitably go into the gift!

I know it's really hard to be an active participant, believe me, I'm an anxious ball of horror, but it will only do good for both parties to interact in this situation. It is a big deal to be offered a hand-crafted gift, but it's also something we want you to love and use, and that can only happen if you tell us what would make you fall in love with what we create.

no thoughts just Heiji Hattori (HD)

Was giving these analysis a read [ x , x , x , x ]

"And there's nothing you can do!" ⛧ Ghost - Rats for WORLD RAT DAY 04/04/2024

I say this in the kindest way possible, but I think this style of prose is more appropriate for a personal account rather than an update account. I have no idea who's being talked about half the time. 🥲

[ Tumblr meme via @mikaikaika ]

i love this funky kid

Okay but I'm going a bit insane about the growing disconnect of "maybe we're meant to harness it"/"maybe we're meant to fight it". They both thought they were on the same page when they said it, when actually they were on polar opposite ends of the same spectrum. Imogen meant "I never plan to give in to this power even if part of me wants to, I will continue fighting it, but it’s a comfort knowing there’s someone who understands the temptation and who I know won't judge and will still love me and understand if I ultimately fail and give in". Meanwhile to Laudna it meant "I've been in this struggle for longer than I can remember and I don’t know if I can do it much longer. I don’t know if I want to. I don’t know if I even should, or if giving in would be better for all of us because I'm a lost cause. You understand this about me and won't judge as I inevitably am doomed by the narrative, and you won't demand of me that I fight an inherent part of myself, even if it’s destroying me". And Imogen is finally catching on to this disconnect, is realizing that to Laudna their connection isn’t just understanding but an excuse, not too different from Lilliana. And, desperate of losing Laudna to power just like she did her mother, she says, 'if you let me go, I'm gone', meanwhile Laudna is going 'all I can do for you is die and let you go to lift you up' and both of them are going 'why are you so upset about this. i love you'.

It's interesting to think about how, to me at least, Dust and Killer are like mirror versions of each other.

One who joins a villain enthusiastically, jumps at the chance to leave his past behind and have a purpose again, and the other who has to be dragged in, would rather rot in the consequences of his own actions.

One who needs orders, needs the distraction and the action and the thrill, can't sit alone with his thoughts for too long lest he hear them clearly, and the other who can't bring himself to ignore the ghost over his shoulder, would rather sit in place and listen to his own self loathing parroted back at him than stand up and find a way to drown it out.

One who doesn't associate with his past anymore, that wasn't me and I wasn't him, and cannot stand the thought of going back from where he came, and the other who wants nothing more than to be his old self again but feels so strongly that he doesn't deserve to return to the life he tore down himself.

They both wear their new names like dog collars, but one is a gift given by someone else because he's theirs, he has somewhere he belongs that he's expected to return to, and the other is a choker tying him to a post, warning others of his danger while never allowing him to get out of arm's reach of his past.

And getting them both back-to-back while trying to understand mortals was probably enough to give Nightmare whiplash