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#when u could be living Now and could be living a bit more ideally now.

haetrack · 1 month

Note

here bc of ur recent post to request soft dom mark smut!!! maybe like morning sex idk i’m not good at requesting and being super specific😭

req 4: mark lee x f!reader

wc: 2.5k

warnings: reader gets off in front of mark, fingering, morning sex, missionary, light overstimulation, pretty tame actually, softdom!mark, sub!reader

a/n: i am crazy but free. u gave me too much freedom to write what i wanted and now i realize just how much i want mark. mark please answer my calls

- ☁︎

when you wake up, you can feel the heat between your legs as you squeeze them together.

mark came home late last night, practice keeping him longer than he was expecting. you know it’s not easy for him, shaking your head when he tries to apologize to you. it didn’t matter how needy you felt, your boyfriend’s health mattered more to you than anything. he says he’ll make it up to you soon, but you hush him as you both lay down.

his arms wrap around your waist, his head nuzzling against your shoulder as he falls asleep. it’s easy for him, but his warm breath on your skin causes you to squirm around. you tell yourself to calm down, you’ll live if you don’t get fucked now, and try hard to go to sleep.

and you do, except that your dream involves mark fucking you into the sheets, whispering praises in your ear as he does so. when you wake up, it’s almost too much for you to handle. you can feel how drenched your panties are, how your cheeks are warm from how real the dream felt.

you’re not sure what you should do. you know mark is still sleeping, and you know you don’t really want to wake him up this early. he deserves his rest, but you can’t help the need building inside of you. you can only squeeze your thighs together, trying to fight off how badly you need him.

would it be so bad if you got off in front of him? you could sneak off to the restroom, but it’s warm under the blanket, mark’s scent surrounding you. your hand slips under your sleeping shorts and panties, fingers slowly circling around your clit. your hand slaps over your mouth, stopping a moan from coming out.

you know mark’s fingers would feel better than yours, but you have to make do with what you have. your fingers dip down to your entrance, two fingers sliding in easily with how wet you are. your mind drifts to mark catching you like this, wondering how he’d react to the sight of you like this.

you have to bite down on your tongue when your fingers move in and out of you, your palm digging into your clit. it’s too much and not enough, and if you could just wake up mark, you’d have everything you want. you fight against it, your hazy mind falling into how good you’re feeling.

when your fingers manage to hit the spot inside of you, you moan out louder than you mean to. even with your hand over your mouth, you know it might’ve been a little too loud. your ministrations still, your fingers inside you as you hear mark inhale deeply behind you. he groans a bit before he stretches a bit, his arm moving back across your waist.

his morning voice makes you clench around your fingers, “morning, baby. slept so good knowing you were at my side.”

you don’t know if he knows that you were getting yourself off, quietly clearing your throat before you speak, “good morning, mark. i’m glad you slept good.”

he pulls you close to him, head falling to the junction of your neck, inhaling your scent. you can feel him slime against your skin, touchy from the comfort of the morning. you’d call him cute, but your fingers are still inside you, walls clenching tightly just from mark being so close.

it’s quiet for a few moments, subtly shifting your hips to try to get your fingers in a little deeper. it’s not ideal, not when your boyfriend is right there, but what can you do.

“hey…” he starts, murmuring against you, “you feel a little hot, you okay?”

your cheeks heat up in embarrassment. do you tell him that you were just getting yourself off to the thought of him. is it too early to really do anything about this? he calls you again, this time his morning voice calling you baby.

you can’t help the whine that comes out of your mouth, slipping your fingers out of you as you turn to face him. he looks so good, and it’s still morning. his eyes look a little concerned, watching your face for any signs of discomfort. he realizes when you grab his hand to put it over your heat.

his fingers twitch, feeling how wet your panties are, mouth opening in shock. his eyes meet yours, and although they look tired, you can see desperation shine in them. he licks his lips, pupils dilating as he presses his palm against your clothed clit. “baby… do you- do you want me that badly?”

you quickly nod, grinding down onto his palm, trying to get any type of friction from him. he chuckles at the sight, “i kept you waiting too long, hmm? you needed me so much, and i kept you waiting, baby.”

he lays you onto your back as moves to sit in front of you. he slowly peels off your shorts and panties, not wanting to rush despite your hushed pleas. he shushes you softly, his thumb meeting your clit as his fingers prod at your entrance, “what’s gotten you so worked up?”

you answer quickly, “you. i dreamt about you, you fucked me so good, couldn’t help it.”

you can hear him suck in a breath at your words, his fingers sliding into you, satisfied with your answer. he doesn’t try teasing you, realizing just how badly you need him. you watch how his cock twitches in the confines of his shorts, feeling your walls clench around his fingers. “do you want my cock, baby? want me to fuck you?”

“please, mark. need you so bad, been needing you since last night.”

he watches as your hips chase his touch, trying to get his fingers deep inside. his hooded eyes meet yours again, “i’ll give you anything you want, want you to feel so good.”

a whimper escapes you as his fingers scissor inside you, opening you up for his cock. you can hear the lewd squelch of his fingers inside of you, your slick spilling out of you. his thumb circles around your clit, quickly trying to get you off. you can feel tightening in your stomach, your hands gripping onto the sheets.

before you can cum, you call out to him, “w-wait, mark. don’t wanna cum just yet, wanna cum on your cock, please.”

he shudders at your words, feels how his cock presses against the front of his shorts. “i k-know baby, i just… i might cum too fast, want you to cum now.”

at his words, his fingers press into your sweet spots, triggering your orgasm. his cock throbs when he feels your walls tighten around his digits, watching you moan out, curling into the sheets under you. he finds you so pretty like this, prettiest thing he’s ever seen.

he helps you ride out your orgasm, moving his fingers inside of you. he slowly pulls them out, watching them slowly as they slip out. his fingers are covered in your arousal, slowly bringing them up to his mouth to lick it all up. he moans around them, “tastes so sweet, my girl tastes so fuckin’ sweet.”

“please hurry, mark. wanna feel you in me already, wanna make you feel good now.”

he quickly slips off his shorts, not bothering to take them off all the way. his cock slaps against his stomach, precum at tip, begging for your touch. he watches you try to reach for his cock, but quickly swats your hands away. you pout at him, and he just sends you an embarrassed smile, “wanna make this about my girl, i know how much you need me.”

you nod at him, not trusting your voice with him so close to you. he pushes his hips against yours, pressing his length against your cunt. he rubs it against your slit, feeling how your slick wets his cock. his tip presses against your clit, causing you both to moan at the same time. you can tell mark is getting lost in the feeling, leaning towards you as he glides against your pussy.

he doesn’t realize how much he’s teasing you. you clench around nothing, wanting nothing more than his cock to fill you up. you try calling out to him, failing when all that comes out is a moan of his name when his tip presses against your entrance. you look at him expectantly, hoping he’ll slide in.

he doesn’t, his mouth falling open as he continues grinding against you. you can feel frustration build up in you, your boyfriend unintentionally keeping your orgasm from you. you stop him once you hear a deep groan fall from his lips, you whisper-shouting his name, breaking him away from the feeling of your warmth.

his eyes shoot towards yours, a light blush painting his cheeks as he lets out a shy laugh. “sorry, baby. just felt so good, didn’t mean to keep you waiting again.”

you reach for his hand, intertwining yours with his. he smiles at the action, lining up his tip at your entrance. he slowly slides in, biting down on his bottom lip to try to conceal any noise, but fails. a deep groan falls from him, “fuck, baby,” his hips slightly stutter against yours, “feel so good in the morning, sucking me in.”

small whimpers fall from your lips, moaning his name once he bottoms out. you can feel him twitch inside you, getting used to the feeling of your warm walls around him. he reaches out to your swollen clit, “been so long, forgot how tight my girl is.”

you nod, your eyes closed shut as you adjust to his cock. he calls out your name, your bleary eyes looking at him. “want you to look at me, baby. want you to see how good i make you feel.”

your hands make it to his shoulders, nails digging into your skin as he starts moving. his thrusts are slow but sharp, wanting to take his time with you so early in the morning. his eyes watch how his cock disappears inside you, watching how his hips press against yours. he can’t get enough of your pussy, can’t ever get enough of you. he’s missed this.

you pull him down to kiss you, lips pressing against each other as he thrusts into you. it’s slow, but it helps with your aching cunt, feeling so full with his cock inside you. between kisses, you speak out a confession, “mark, making me feel so good,” a moan cuts you off, “i was- i was touching myself before you woke up.”

his eyes shoot straight to yours, waiting for you to continue. “just need you so bad, didn’t wanna wake you up.”

“t-that’s so hot. fuck, you’re so hot.”

he pulls you into a kiss, slowing down his movements. his thrusts are deep and slow, letting yourself feel his cock against your walls. you moan into his mouth, his hand reaching under your shirt to grope at your chest. he tweaks a nipple between his fingers, a satisfied groan leaving his lips as you arch up to his touch.

he can feel your walls begin clenching around him, watches how you throw your head back against the pillows as you moan at his name. even through the haze in his mind, he thinks you’re the prettiest like this. he leans down to your ear, “are you gonna cum for me? is my needy baby gonna cum all over my cock?”

you let out a small yes, stray tears falling from your eyes as he wipes them away with his thumb. at the sweet action of your boyfriend, still caring for you so early in the morning, you cum. his thumb quickly rubs circles against your clit when he feels your walls clench around him.

he has to physically stop himself from cumming too fast, his hips stilling as your walls suck him in deeper, trying to milk his cock of all his cum. he’s not sure how he can hold back when you feel so good, when you call his name so sweetly, or how pretty you look cumming under him.

he calls out to you with a shaky voice, his head falling to your shoulder with a groan of your name. with a few quick thrusts, he cums inside of you, filling you up with his cum. you pull him close to you, and he can feel your hard nipples press against his chest. he’s letting out moans, pressing kisses against your skin as he rides out his orgasm.

“you’re so fucking tight, missed your pussy- missed you so much.” he grinds into you, feeling how your walls clench from overstimulation, “you were made for my cock, we were made for each other.”

he can’t help the sounds coming out of him, not when you clench around him so nicely. he moans in your ear, babbles of how good you feel and how much he’s misses this can only be heard. you can feel his thighs shake against you as it gets too much for him, causing him to still as his cock begs for him to slow down.

he takes a few breaths before he pulls out. he lazily sits back, watching your twitching cunt drip with his cum. he has to stop himself from pushing his cum back into you, fingers twitching at his side as he watches your cum slip down to your sheets. you kick him a little, a shy whine coming from you, embarrassed from how hard he was staring.

he laughs at you, joining you at your side. the sun fills the room, the warmth of your bodies together. he cuddles into your side, taking a deep breath, inhaling your scent. he takes a quick look at your face, thinks you look even prettier after you’ve cum in the morning. he smiles to himself, pressing a kiss to your shoulder.

“think i might have to make you cum every morning if it means i get to see you like this.”

you shove lightly at his shoulder, “you’re so weird-” he laughs hard at your whining, “can’t you just say i look nice and go?”

“can’t be normal around my girl, you make me go crazy.”

his head falls to your shoulder, fingers dancing across your skin, goosebumps raising at the feeling. your hand makes it to his hair, pushing it back as you press a kiss to his forehead. it’s quiet for a few moments more, your heartbeats syncing up from how close you are to each other. you could fall asleep like this.

mark realizes how heavy your breaths get, watching your covered chest rise and fall. he looks at you, so close he can count all the eyelashes on your face. he presses a kiss to your cheek before cuddling up next to you. he follows you back to sleep, a dream of you next to him playing in his mind.

#asks #reqs :3 #nct smut #nct 127 smut #nct dream smut #mark lee fic #mark lee smut #mark lee x reader #mark lee scenarios

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kiztae · 9 months

Note

hi! if ur not too busy do u think u could come up with something for size kink w soobin? pls & thank you ! 💛

SIZE KINK — c.soobin

genre: afab!reader, very suggestive, brothers bestfriend!soobin, bulge kink, size kink (duh), making out, dry humping, dirty talk? that's probably it. wc: 1.8k [requested]

a/n: might be a bit short. hope you enjoy anon!

just like any other saturday, soobin came over to visit your older brother beomgyu and spend the rest of it playing games in his room. it wasn't new to find soobin in the living room, sitting in the couch and scrolling through his phone mindlessly.

it was only natural, considering he almost lived there with you guys with how often he’d come by. so when you crossed his path, you didn't really mind it and conformed to uttering a soft 'hi soobin' before stepping into the kitchen.

"hi y/n" he looks up with a raise of his eyebrows in acknowledgment, shutting off his phone and standing up slightly to move towards the kitchen island. "how's today treating you?" he inquires with a playful smile as he leans over the counter with his elbows.

“it’s treating me fine, soobin. what about you?” you say between yawns while pouring yourself a glass of water.

you had just woken up a few minutes ago, whenever it was sunday you allowed yourself to sleep in as much as you’d like. which is why you were currently standing in the kitchen, wearing your small pajama shorts and a loose t-shirt you found in your brothers room, at noon.

“so far, so good. but i have to say, it’s even better now that you’re here.” he adds boldly, looking down at the marble and then back up at you.

you could see his eyes glimmer mischievously as he ended his sentence, the two orbs dropping lower and trailing down your exposed collarbones, your chest that was exposing just about enough cleavage to help his imagination, and finally, your hands. everything about you looked so dainty and small, soobin couldn’t help but think about how adorable and weirdly hot he found it.

hell, he knew it was wrong to think about his best friend's little sister under this lewd light but it was just so hard not to.

“you really have a way with words don’t you? save them for the girls on your campus.” you grin in response, emptying the glass of cold water in your mouth and feeling the new energy flowing through your body.

if you had to be honest, it’s not like you hadn’t thought about soobin like that before. you were aware of how attractive he was and especially how close to your ideal type he proved to be. soobin was tall, handsome and a literal giant in proportions but also adorable and cute at times.

nevertheless, you pushed those thoughts away quickly whenever you remembered who he was to you. he was your brother’s best friend, he was older than you, he had many other things he could care about other than you… so why bother?

sure, it wouldn't be awful to have some fun with him, especially after not having any form of sexual activity in the past months (not even a kiss), but you were sure it was all not going to happen anyway. so, you tried your best to stay unfazed by his comments and approaches, figuring he was just teasing you.

“i’m not sweet talking you y/n. i’m—“ before he could continue, beomgyu walked into the room with a loud “you can use the shower now!”, signaling that you could start your morning routine and that he could get back to hanging out with his best friend.

“what are you doing here? you could’ve waited in my room man.” he says with an awkward laugh as he taps his friend’s back.

“well, see you around.” you bid your goodbye and go off to continue with your day, not bothering to finish the earlier conversation.

why was getting up suddenly so hard? some sort of heavy weight was placed on top of you, not letting you move up or even around in the room of your mattress. this was not like any other sunday morning. were you still dreaming? after squirming in place for a little more you opened your eyes slowly and looked around despite the hazy vision of your only recent wake up call.

moving around (if you could even call it that) helped you figure out two things: 1. whatever it was that was stopping you was laying half on top of you and pressing your side 2. it was breathing. as soon as you realized the second, you started kicking your feet up and turning around in a hurry like crazy.

"woah—! what the—!" the lump under the other blanket started to blurt out in panic, until it moved up and revealed itself. that's when you were met with a confused soobin with the biggest case of bed hair you've seen.

before you could process it, he swiftly took your wrists into his hands and pushed them against the mattress effortlessly, shifting completely on top of you to keep your legs caged between both of his on your sides with ease. finally, if he got kicked once more he was sure he would get bruises.

"hey—!" you shout against his defense before his right palm comes up to cover your mouth clumsily. it was ridiculous how much of your face his hand covered then, all of your jaw and part of your neck being hidden behind it.

"shhh. don't you realize it's super early in the morning?" he whisper-shouts back, frowning and staring into your eyes, finally.

you relaxed and twisted your head around to take in the room, noticing that it was indeed still dark and that the sunset hadn't even happened yet. once you took it in, you took in the sight of soobin, at last. he was breathing loudly, his hair messy, his shirt hanging low on his chest and his eyes waving around as he looked into yours.

"why are you in my bed?" you murmur with a confused frown once he removed his hand, your breathing starting to speed up when you realize the position you're in right now. god, you hoped he was still sleepy enough to not notice the pink blooming in your cheeks.

"i— i don't know. i thought i went into beomgyu's room after i woke up to drink some water... but i guess not." he trails off, his eyes dipping lower from your eyes to your neck, your disheveled hair, your shirt that bunched up and exposed your waist, until he came back up to stare at your mouth for longer.

"i guess not..." you imitate quietly when your gaze also lays on his pouty lips and then back to his eyes.

"i'm sorry y/n" he states in a more deep voice, his tone sounding hushed as he leaned in closer to you, the hand holding your wrist pushing further up and the other dipping the mattress on your side.

"huh? for what?" you mutter out in surprisement at the sudden apology, your voice breaking softly once you feel him get closer.

"for not holding myself back." he whispers back, his hand interlacing with yours and pinning it deeper into the sheets as he catches your breath in a swift kiss. the action earned a small gasp from you, your form stiffening under his hold briefly, unsure of what was happening, until you sighed into his mouth and leaned in.

he softly groaned in satisfaction once he felt you relax and open your mouth more for him, granting him permission to kiss you deeper. "i'm such a shit best friend aren't i? i just couldn't hold it in anymore." he comments as he leaves your lips for a second, the loss of contact already making you disappointed.

but he doesn't stop. his free hand grazes your side softly and grasps your waist roughly, another gasp coming from you that's quickly swallowed by soobin's lips on yours. his kisses are desperate, hungry even. it's like he doesn't want to waste a single second when he's kissing you.

his tongue dips into your bottom lip and then brushes against yours, the wet sound of it starting to get more noticeable as his mouth melts with yours. you weren't sure you expected soobin to get messy like this, saliva mixing with yours, kisses sloppy and needy, you were loving it.

soobin was heavy on top of you, he was making sure he didn't lay his whole body weight, knowing for sure he would crush you, but he was letting himself press against you just enough for you to be trapped below him. if he wanted to, he could do anything he wanted to you, easily. he could make you his personal ragdoll, move you around however he wanted, take you however he wanted.

as his mouth detached from yours to dip lower and start biting and nipping at your neck, the hand on your waist trailed up and stopped right before your breast. "can i? please.." he says in a hushed voice as he licks a small stripe on the bites he left, his breathing ragged already. following your nod he takes your breast in his hand, his grasp being enough to cover it whole. once he gets permission his hands start roaming around your body more and more, grabbing whatever he can. his palms kneading your ass, then playing with your nipples, grasping your hip tightly as he groans into your mouth between kisses.

"you're so small— i could break you if i'm too rough, couldn't i?" he purrs into your ear, biting your earlobe gently and grinning. he didn't know what got into him but seeing you so weak and helpless in his hold was driving him crazy, he never knew he was so big until now.

"you're just— too big." the whiny tone in your voice as you replied was what did it for him. how could you say that to him and expect him not to go insane?

"fuck, don't do that to me." he blurts out as he lets his head fall on your chest, his hands tightening around your hips. "i won't be able to stop." he warns before his fingers dig into your sides and he pushes himself against you, his giant bulge rubbing on your underwear harshly.

"oh my god— soobin, you're huge" you moan out as the shocks of pleasure hit you, your hips instantly jolting forwards to meet his. at this, he starts thrusting his hips harder and faster against you, rocking the bed carelessly.

"yeah? bet that if i fucked you, you'd have a bulge right here. wouldn't you baby?" he questions while rubbing your tummy right above where his dick was pushing into you. "i'd fuck you so deep, you'd feel it in your stomach." he adds with a smirk, looking right into your eyes as if to taunt you. he never once stopped rocking his hips against you, the tip of his cock starting to leak through his boxers and onto your panties, hitting you right with each thrust.

"then do it." you plead in between whines, taking his cheek in your hand and staring into his eyes desperately. "fuck me until you break me."

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mirkoluvs · 10 months

Text

★ GETTING INTO AN ARGUMENT WITH MHA CHARACTERS (PT. 1)

characters: midoriya, bakugo, todoroki

genre: angst !!

notes: two parter !! just a note that my request box is still open !! love u all <3

izuku midoriya

- he always tries his hardest to avoid arguments at any cost, but of course, it’s only natural for them to happen within relationships.

- you always looked out for him like he looked out for you, but for some reason he would never listen as he was so determined to living up to people’s ideals.

- so when you saw him randomly phasing out during the middle of a group conversation with the rest of your class, you tapped his hand, causing him to shake out of his trance. you signed for him to follow you as you got up and walked over to a more private area of the dorms.

“is there something wrong?”, he asked. looking at his features, you could see dark circles coming in. sighing you took his hand into yours, holding it before looking at him. “izuku you know how much i love you, and how much i look out for you and everything. i just- do you think you can maybe tone it down with all the training…?”, you hesitantly asked, head hanging low. you could hear izuku sigh as he rubbed a hand over his face. “y/n, you know i cant”, he started, but you cut him off before he could go on his usual rant. “i just don’t get why. i mean, you’re doing all of this but you’re literally draining yourself while doing it which means you aren’t giving it your best”, you tried to reason, looking back at him. he scoffed underneath his breath at your words. “are you implying that i’m not putting in enough effort or something?”, he asked, his tone starting to become a bit defensive. your eyes narrowed at his words, shaking your head in denial and confusion. “no, that’s not- why are you twisting my words right now? i’m just trying to look out for you-“, “you aren’t my mom, y/n! just give it a rest! i know my own limits, i know when to stop. i’m here to become a hero if you somehow forgot, so just quit getting on me about rest and things like that, okay?!”, he quickly interrupted you. his words left your throat dry, your head lowering to the ground as you subtly nodded your head, sucking on your bottom lip. he quickly took notice at your body language and realized the harshness of his words. “baby, wait- that’s not how i wanted that to come out. i just-“, he started, but you cut him off, shaking your head. “no. i get it. it’s fine. forget i said anything”, you quietly responded, your voice somewhat cracking as you walked away, his hand just missing your wrist as he watched you walk off. he cursed at himself underneath his breath, shame taking over.

katsuki bakugo

- it wasn’t uncommon to get in arguments with katsuki considering how stubborn both of you were, but none of them were ever really serious.

- something everyone knows about him is that his number one goal was to become the number one hero, and he never let himself get distracted from that.

- turns out, he was serious about not getting distracted, because due to him training, he somehow managed to forget your one year anniversary all day.

- that’s why when he knocked on your dorm room door and didn’t hear anything back, he was a bit confused.

“y/n, it’s me. open up”, he muttered, knocking on your door again. silence. just when he was about to knock again, the door slightly cracked open. “what the hell are you doing?”, he asked, confused at your behavior. “you cant be fucking serious katsuki”, you scoffed. you pulled him into your room before slamming the door shut behind you, turning to look at him. “what are you so upset about?”, he asked, slightly annoyed at your big mood change. “you really forgot our one year anniversary…?”, you asked, your voice somewhat cracking as you leaned back against the door. his eyes widened. he forgot your anniversary. he got too caught up in his training and hero-related activities that it completely slipped his mind, but once again, his pride and stubbornness was too strong to let him apologize so easily. “is it really that big of a deal?”, he muttered, cocking his head to the side. your eyes widened at his words, anger rushing through your veins. “ok, i get you don’t like to admit when you’re wrong and shit, but can you at LEAST apologize for forgetting?!”, you slightly raised your voice, moving closer towards him. he scoffed under his breath, anger quickly taking over him as well. “it’s just a year, what the hell is so special about that?! it’s not my fault you wanna make everything such a big damn deal”, he fought back. your heart dropped at his words. was this really how he saw your whole relationship? “wow. nice to know how much this means to you katsuki”, you muttered. he cursed under his breath as he watched you start to fall into a sad state. “talk to me when you calm down”, you told him quietly, leaving him alone in your own room as you just wanted to be away from him at the moment. once the door shut he groaned, rubbing his hands across his face as he cursed at himself for being so reckless with his words.

shoto todoroki

- it obviously took him a while to become so comfortable and open around you considering his past, but he managed to do it all for you

- although he was a lot better at being open with you and actually talking things out than he was before, he still struggled every now and then with it.

- and it just so happened that this was one of those days, but it was worse than usual.

- shoto had told you he was going to his house for the day and you knew that usually he’d end up returning in not as good as a mood as before, but when he came back today, he seemed really pissed.

“sho? is everything okay?”, you asked, confused and concerned as to why he came back with such an agitated expression on his face. “fine”, he muttered quickly under his breath, kicking his shoes off as he placed them neatly in a cubby. “clearly not… something happened when you went to visit, right?”, you questioned. it wasn’t uncommon for him to be annoyed in some sort when returning from his residence, but he was never this annoyed. “i told you it’s fine”, he grumbled again. you sighed as you followed close behind him as he took the elevator up to his dorm, where you both usually hung out in together. the elevator ride up was awkwardly silent, you could hear a pin drop even. once the elevator stopped, you both walked out, you following behind him. the silence continued to linger for longer, to the point where it was pissing you off a bit. “shoto, seriously. cant you just talk to me a little bit? i’m not asking you to give me every single detail, i just wanna know if your okay”, you explained, grabbing them hem of his sleeve to make him stop moving. you heard him let out a sharp exhale as he turned around, pulling his sleeve out of your hold. “do you have to be so persistent?! i told you i was fine already, stop shoving your nose in things that don’t concern you”, he snapped at you. you froze at his words, not even knowing how to respond. you quietly cleared your throat, exhaling before responding. “if that’s how you feel… i’ll go. see you”, you muttered, pursing your lips as you slightly nodded, tears glazing your eyes as you walked away, not even giving him the chance to speak. he tried to call after you, but you were already in the elevator, the door beginning to close. he balled his hands into a fist, hitting himself against the forehead as he groaned at his inconsiderate words. he let his anger out at the last person who deserved it and he knew he was in the wrong completely.

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localkiss · 7 days

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Screaming for attention!

manipulative brothers best friend re4!leon kennedy x fem!reader

cw: DEAD DOVE DO NOT EAT!! Mentions of past grooming by leon, age gap(~8 yrs), manipulation, guilt, dirty talk, p in v, afab reader, noncon creampie, slight anal/talks of anal, codependency, slapping, daddy kink, pet names, depressed thoughts in the beginning, chubby/thicker reader, manhandling, praise kink, degradation kink, talks of pregnancy (just a bit), oral (f receiving), virginity talk, controlling leon, obsessed leon, slight size kink if u squint!

note: hhh... read the warning lol before you comment. I was going to put more of leon being so fucking weird but erm, decided not to. not proof read btw!! but i do want to say i am a victim of SA and i used to heavily think about him and wished that he went further. lol idc what people say, i still struggle thinking like that, but ik it's wrong. so yes that's what this fic is loosely based on -_-

wc: 3.1k! tags: @rigorwhoring, @argreion, @xoxostarlet, @fairry1 bc I love u all :33!

Maybe it's for the best. No more surprises. This is nothing new. All you can hear is deafening silence, swallowing you up in a warm cocoon, suffocating you like a million years of guilt and thousands of weights on your throat and chest.

You can't help but wish he had done more. Maybe he would've if he could see your thoughts. Maybe he would've stayed.

But those sleeping pills really did a number on your body. You tried to overdose on everything you could, even your antidepressants. Yeah, it was dumb. But it was all just killing you from the inside anyway.

All you can do now is just sob violently into your pillows. Claw at the sheets and at your scalp, so pathetically. No wonder he chose you. So fucking easy to manipulate, to knead into someone he can use. No wonder he said he only loved you like a friend after he finally got caught in the act.

Whatever it was that he said, you can't remember exactly. You just tuned him out. White noise oozing into your eardrums like water does when you stand underneath the showerhead. He didn't apologize. Didn't explain. Didn't even try to. All you did was cry and plead for him to stay.

"Please don't leave me, Leon. Please, I can't live without you! I love you! Please!" You sobbed into the phone because, yeah, he broke up with you over text. It's not like you guys were even in a relationship. The age gap was too big and illegal to even be considered a real relationship.

You knew he was so much older than you. Liked it. Knew it was wrong, yet went forward with it. He should've stopped it. Should've. But he didn't, though.

You still love him deep down in your heart. He was your first love. First 'boyfriend'. First person to grope your body. You asked for a kiss, and he pressed his chapped lips against your forehead. He asked you for ass pictures, and you gladly sent them. Giggling happily whenever he complimented you and your body.

He's still your ideal type. A cuddly, tall, muscular brunette.

You wish you could stop yourself from comparing every guy to him or hoping they won't end up like him. Using you and throwing you away as soon as they got what they wanted.

But, now that you're legal, he reached out to you. Said some nonsense to try and get back into your heart. You didn't even care what he said. Just wanted to feel alive, to feel loved, and to be loved again. Even if it meant being loved by your abuser, you would let him drag you through hell and back if it meant he would love you like he did in the past. If it meant you could feel happy, free, and weightless again, you would march into hell with him.

As messed up as you are, you would do anything to make him stay. So that you can feel full again. Happy again.

"Wish you would've taken all of my firsts," you pouted as he pulled away from your lips. Swollen and red, so pretty.

Leon grinned and raised an eyebrow at your statement. "Really, baby girl? Damn," he bites on his lower lip, and his thumb brushes across the apples of your cheeks.

Taking in the way you look different but still the same as you were years ago, just a bit fuller in your hips, thighs, and stomach, he remembers when he gripped your thigh with both of his hands. Couldn't even manage to grab ahold of all of the fat. A few inches away from completely grabbing your thigh with both hands.

Now, he probably couldn't even make it so that there were a few inches between his hands; it would be a bit of a distance. That's how much you've grown width-wise. Length wise, you haven't really grown much.

"Yeah, daddy," you preen under his attention, shifting your weight from your heels to your toes, and back down flat on the floor. "I mean it."

He lets out a soft chuckle, and his calloused hands softly grab onto your shoulders, rubbing small circles into the fabric of your shirt. "Wish I could've taken all of your first too, baby. I know I would've made it all special for you. For my special girl." Leon coos, his head dipping down to lick into your mouth.

Hot spit trickles down the back of your throat and onto your chin. Making you squeeze your doughy thighs together, moaning as his hands squeeze down to your ass. Pressing you up against his built body. His hard-on throbbing against the confines of his skinny jeans, onto your soft, pudgy tummy.

He groans as you tug at the hair on the back of his head. Pulling back and squishing your cheeks together, and then tapping your face as you try to press your lips on his. His blue eyes darken as you moan when his hand makes contact with your face.

"Fuck," he grips onto your chin, forcing your mouth open to let a wad of spit hit the edge of your tongue, letting it slide down into your tummy. "Daddy knew you'd like that. I've got a slutty little princess, huh?"

It's a rhetorical question, but you answer with a few quick nods.

"Yeah, daddy, I'm your slutty little princess." Always so quick to repeat what he said. What he drilled into your brain years ago obviously holds up. You still want to make him happy, even if he ruined you for anyone else. Ruined you for life.

The corners of his lips quirk upwards, his hands giving your ass a quick squeeze before he pushes you down into the bed. He climbs on top of you like a hungry animal, licking his lips at the sight of his prey.

A whine escapes from your throat at the sight. He's gotten even more attractive and bigger, and it's making your brain all mushy. Shooting directly down to your core, feeling it gush out slick onto the gussets of your panties.

You lick your lips and wrap your legs around his hips. "Please, Leon."

He lets out a low growl, his veiny forearms coming up by the sides of your head. Firmly planting them on the mattress as he rocks his hips into yours. His bangs fall into your face as he teasingly grazes his lips against yours. Panting hotly against your lips.

"Relax, baby," is all he says before he moves his mouth, making a wet trail from the corner of your lips down to your jawline.

"Let me love you." Leon murmurs into your skin as he sucks a hickey underneath your ear, making you gasp and squirm beneath him.

You become pliable, easy to bend, and easy to please. Brain too foggy to clearly think straight. Leon's marking up your neck like you'll try to run away from him. It's like you're his property now. God, you've always been his, ever since that fateful day, right?

Just a few words, and he can do whatever he wants with your body. Maybe one day you'll let him take your first time with your other hole. Who knows.

"So pretty, fuck," his tongue dips between the valley of your breasts, hands grasping at your shirt to push it up, exposing you to his hungry eyes. His knee slots between your thighs, making you squeak and squeeze his leg involuntarily. Pressing your tits together to swipe his tongue across your perky nipples.

Bathing your tits in his spit, he suckles on them like a madman. Enjoying the way you mewl and gasp, using his teeth to draw out more noises from you. Obsessed with every single part of you, even the not-so-pretty parts. He has you mapped out in his mind, his sweet, supple princess.

"Has anyone ever eaten you out?" Kissing your areolas, soothing the small bite marks he left. He looks up at you through his eyelashes, brows furrowed in concentration. He's doting on you like it's the last time he'll ever see you again.

"No," you say, pressing your lips together in a flat line. Feeling your stomach tighten up with butterflies and hints of nausea.

Leon likes that. So much so that he smiles into your stomach, softly gnawing on the pudge around your belly button, earning some soft squeals and pats to try and push him away. He wants to make you crumble under him, submit to him, and never leave. Never want another man. Always comparing someone to him, wishing they did it like him. He wants to plague your mind and control you from the inside out.

He wants to tie you up in his bedroom and never let you leave. Live your own life? No. Leon wants to drill it into your brain and body that he owns you, no thoughts about anything else but him and his body.

He pulls down your shorts and panties in one go, watching the string of your arousal stick to the gussets of your panties. His large hands pry open your legs, pushing them up to your chest and holding them down with his weight.

"Remember this," he spits onto your pussy, watching it swim down to your holes. Squeezing your legs when you squirm a little too much for his taste, deciding to spit once more to make sure you'll have his DNA in you for the next couple of days.

Pressing chaste kisses on your clit because he knows it'll make your mind go all fuzzy and only think of Leon, Leon, Leon. And how good he's making you feel. Nobody else but him.

He dips his tongue between your folds and begins to languidly make out with it. Thrusting his tongue and swirling it upwards as his upper lip continues to make contact with your clit. Drawing out all sorts of pathetically cute noises from you.

Wishing he was recording this so he could show it to his friends and brag about how he has molded you to be his perfect girl. You're not a woman until he fucks a baby into you.

"You like that?" He suckles on your clit and gently bites down on it. Watching the way your face crinkles up and how you squeeze your eyes shut. Everything you do amuses him.

"Daddy, mmh... god, yes!" You grasp the sheets as you feel a warm, fuzzy feeling in your lower abdomen. Toes curling as Leon fucks his tongue into your drippy hole.

He shakes his head, pressing his nose into your sensitive bundle of nerves, trying to get you to cum quickly.

Your hands desperately try to reach for Leon for comfort as you stumble into an orgasm. "Daddy... Mmphh—fuck!"

Legs kicking out and vibrating as he coaxes you through your orgasm. Slowly swiping his tongue through your folds to slurp up all of your cum, he presses soft kisses all around your pussy. "Such a good girl," he sighs.

Leon spreads your legs, kissing his way up to your face. He licks his way into your mouth, forcing you to taste yourself on his tongue and gulp down some of his saliva. "So easy." He puts his hand on your neck, lightly applying pressure as he goes back in for more kisses. Make sure you never leave this cloudy state of mind, so he can do whatever he pleases with you.

"Maybe I can even eat you out here," he says, letting his hand wander down to your asshole and lightly tracing the rim of it. Feeling you tense up brings a sly smile to his face. "No? Okay. Maybe next time." He chuckles and pulls back to unbuckle his jeans.

Slowly undoing his belt and putting it next to you on the bed. Unzipping his fly as he makes direct eye contact with you the entire time. He makes you gulp nervously as he finally pushes his jeans down his muscular thighs.

Your eyes immediately jump to his hard-on. How does he even keep that thing in there? It's begging to be freed, and quite frankly, you want to run away out of nerves, not believing his cock can even fit inside of you! What the fuck did Leon even eat for it to even have grown that big and thick?

Leon sees the cogwheels turning in your head as he steps out of his pants. With each step he takes, it bounces against the slightly stained, striped fabric. "Baby, don't be so nervous. It'll be alright." His voice is soothing and convincing, almost hypnotic in the way it makes your body buzz and your mind go blank.

It is a bit terrifying to think about the effect he honestly has on you, your mind, body, and soul.

"Are you on the pill?" He asks, although he already knows the answer.

"No, I'm not." You mumble shyly. Embarrassed to not be on some sort of birth control.

Leon reaches down for his wallet and pulls out a condom. "Good thing I always come prepared, huh?" Chuckles as he pulls down his briefs, stepping out of them as he tears open the condom packaging. He slipped it on his drippy and flushed tip, sliding all the way down to the base.

Slowly kneeling on the bed to lead his dick to your hole. Sliding through your folds to gather more fluids to make the first push easier on you.

"Ready?" He grunts as he teases you by tapping himself on your swollen clit.

"Uhuh, 'm ready," you whine as he slowly eases himself into your pussy.

Moaning as you helplessly flutter and tighten around his shaft. Watching your face carefully as you scrunch and tense up. Stopping halfway and grabbing ahold of your hand, his other one grips the fat of your hip so tight it'll leave a bruise the next day.

"Almost there, baby girl, doing so well for me," he presses a soft kiss to your forehead as he drives more of himself deep inside of you.

You look down at your stomach and tighten around him as you notice the bulge from his cock being so big and deep inside of you. His tip is brushing against the opening of your womb.

"Nnh, Leon, too big," you gasp as he rolls his hips against yours. Legs squeezing against his waist as he slowly starts to thrust shallowly.

"Baby, relax. Can barely pull out of you," Leon rasps in your ear, sending chills down your spine as you try to force yourself to relax around him.

"Mnmph, sorry, Daddy. Please—" you pout, squeezing his hand tightly. Trying to signal for him to start pounding your needy cunt already.

He nibbles on your earlobe, slowly shifting his hips to thrust in and out of you properly. Soft plap, plap, plap, of his body hitting yours, making sure that he hits your g-spot.

You swallow a whine as he lets go of your hip to lazily rub his thumb on your swollen little button. Hearing the way your breath hitches and seeing the slight curve in your spine makes all his administrations worth it. Slowly speeding up his movements as he squeezes your hand, groaning low in his throat when you clench around him tightly like a vice.

"Tight cunt all f'me," he thrusts harder and harder, making it difficult to keep quiet. Soft punched-out cries leave your lips alongside Daddy, Daddy, Daddy's. "Fuck, daddy's gonna make you cum so hard around his cock, might even make you scream."

Leon slowly pushes your legs up, putting you into a mating press as he drives himself deeper into you. Fucking into your womb, which craves his thick cum. Ecstatic with the idea of 'accidentally' slipping the condom off and cumming deep in your womb. Get you pregnant and finally be his woman.

"God, wanna get you pregnant so bad, baby," he pants, bangs falling into your face with each harsh thrust. "Would take care of you and the baby. Mmhh shit—would suck the milk outta your fat leaky tits."

Drools into your mouth as he kisses you with fervor, teeth clashing as his dick continues to fill up your sloppy pussy.

"Leon, please, 'm so close," you hiccup as he vigorously rubs your clit in tight circles. Your legs brush up against his head as you feel that familiar warm coil in your stomach.

"Cum for me princess." Leon's eyes darken; pupil's swallowing up his iris as he watches you unfold before him. Because of him.

Your body tenses up and convulses with each swipe of his thumb on your sensitive nerves. Letting out a silent scream, your eyes close tightly as you try to hold onto Leon as best as you can, feeling his hot breath on your kissed, swollen lips. His fat cock is hitting all the right spots, almost painfully good as he fucks you deeply. Constantly pressing up against your womb, making your toes curl.

Slowly rutting through your orgasm, he feels his own start to creep up on him. "Fuck, hold on, baby. Gonna pull out for a sec," he pants, pulls out of your heat, and discreetly pulls off the condom, letting it fall on his jeans.

He quickly puts it back in before you can notice, giving you a spine-chilling smile. Giving you a few pecks on your lips and on your forehead as he uses you like a fleshlight now.

Letting out soft whimpers and moans, he puts his head on your shoulder. The sounds of sex are his favorite sounds. Your crying is his favorite sound in the entire world. Nothing can top you crying out for him while moaning like a total slut.

"So fucking hot, Jesus Christ," he groans, hips rabbiting into your pussy. Your insides are so warm and so wet, he feels like it's the first time he's going raw ever. Orgasm on the fence with each thrust. That and you're making all these noises, it's hard for him to concentrate on not cumming so fast.

"G'nna cum, babe, holy fuck—" He lifts his head off of your shoulder and kisses you feverishly, spitting deep into your throat. Putting his forehead on yours, his nose touches yours as he grunts, pumping his cum into your pussy. Sticky white ropes straight into your womb.

Panting and whimpering as his cock slowly ruts into your messy cunt. "Fuck... So good," he chuckles lightheartedly.

Your pussy quivers around his shaft as it softens up. It feels so hot and sticky, and your mind is too fuzzy to even process that he came inside. A dumbfounded smile plastered on your flushed pink face makes his heart swell up.

"Such a good girl. My good girl, right?" Leon nuzzles his nose against yours. Driving the fact that you'll always be his. Even if you move across the country, he'll always follow. Always in your shadow.

"Uhuh," you respond shyly, giggling at the affection he's giving you. His eyes soften up, and you take in his face. The light stubble, small acne scars, and the way his hair is fading from dirty blonde to brown. "always, daddy."

#leon kennedy #leon s kennedy #resident evil smut #leon smut #resident evil x reader #leon kennedy x you #leon x reader #leon kennedy x reader #dead dove fic #dead dove do not eat #leon resident evil #re4 leon #re4r leon #leon scott kennedy #localkiss

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astrologydayz · 6 months

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SOUTH NODE IN HOUSES - SYNASTRY💘

South Node in partners 1st house makes the house person feel so fucking comfortable. South Node person can help the house person with how to have a healthy, and loyal partnership. House person is alright with South Node person being the leader in the relationship, and feels like South Node is someone they have a deep soul connection with. This placement is meant to have a relationship of some kind, and a very deep one. U left a deep impression on each other in a past life and you're supposed 2 meet one way, or another in this one fam ✨❤️‍🔥.

South Node in partners 2nd house makes the house person feel very possessive over the South Node person, but not in a toxic way. House person feels safe for the first time, and doesn't want anyone to ruin that. Honestly, they were probably together in a past life so house person will do anything they can to protect the South Node, maybe sometimes even do irrational things 2 keep South Node around. But they'll love to be in each others company, and can last a very long time cuz they feel so secure together 👫🌤.

South Node in partners 3rd house makes the house person feel like they met in a past life, or have some unfinished karma to take care of. House person finds it very easy to communicate with the South Node person because they've met before, they could also have been siblings or neighbours in a past life ⭐⭐⭐. House person can also feel a little tense at times, because they think so alike ⚡⚡⚡.

South Node in partners 4th house makes the house person have deep karmic relations 2 the South Node person, can be bad or good tho depending on aspects 😇👿. They have each others back at ANYTIME! against anyone that tries 2 tear them apart. House person feels so connected, that they sometimes even go against their own morals. But they are meant 2 be together, and they're family 🖤. Till death do us apart baby 💋⛓.

South Node in partners 5th house indicates that they were lovers in a past life, maybe even an extramarital affair between the two 👀💍. In this lifetime you've come together 2 do it right, and be together properly. Social events, and parties is ideal 4 u guys. Kids could also have been a big theme in a past life 4 u guys, so no kids could be a big option in this life 💍🥂🍾.

South Node in partners 6th house makes the toxic traits a bit more obvious here, than any other placement. House person could feel like the South Node person owes them something from last life. House person might have the upper hand in this lifetime 🗣💪👀 it also indicates that they will feel like they can't be without each other , so you'll keep coming back together 🙅‍♀️🙅💗.

South Node in partners 7th house means they were tied by death in a past life🤲🪐, and will be together in this one. House person will feel like South Node pushes the house person to change, but 2 change with them and not feel alone while doing so. After they worked their karma out, there's a high chance that they will part ways. South Node helps house person 2 find out who they are, and when they do? all bets are off 🤷‍♀️❤️‍🔥

💔

South Node in partners 8th house means that you guys were probably enemies in a past life, and no we're not talking about petty shit. One of y'all could have killed the other, especially the South Node person 🧐😮‍💨👁, now let's get2 the good shit. House will have been waiting 2 find South Node person for a long time. House person feels like South Node is the only one who can connect with them, soul level indicated 💋💋.

South Node in partners 9th house makes the couple expand every area of their lives, especially when it comes to higher learning, spirituality and long distance travels. They are meant to be each others "guiding star"⭐ in this lifetime, cuz they've healed each other before and will do it again ❗❗❗. House person will feel like South Node person knows best, not because they don't trust their own judgement but because they have so much faith in South Node person<33.

South Node in partners 10th house indicates great business deals and partnerships - u guys helped each other a lot in a past life so naturally you'll do the same in this one 💁‍♀️💸💸💵💵. Could also indicate an arranged marriage by your parents tho 😵‍💫😵‍💫😵‍💫. House person may feel like South Node person want to get married, getting started on creating a family quick and things like that. They naturally look good together btw 💅✨✨.

South Node in partners 11th house could be an indication of step kids in this relationship, both or one partner could have kid/s before meeting the other 💜. Your soul contract is 2 finish unfinished business, and start 2 love how fucking nice it is that y'all are different. You met in a past life, and probably didn't like each other 😭🤣, but in this lifetime you'll learn how to love each other and come together when things get rocky 🦾🖤.

South Node in partners 12th house is a deep soul contract/karma that these two have. One can end up with a deep soul connection, or a deep heartbreaking experience with no understanding of what was really going on 👿🥺. South Node could take advantage and use the house person, 4 their own personal gain! but look at the aspects 2 c which way it will go babe<333.

THANK U 4 SUPPORTING ME, I'll always do anything I can 2 help u!! BE KIND!! WE NEVER KNOW WHAT PEOPLE ARE GOING THROUGH. Let’s love and support each other, instead of tearing each other down💜.

#south node #astrology notes #astro community #astrology #synastry #astrology observations #astro notes #astro observations

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dragcnbreak · 6 months

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AHHH THE AGE REGRESSION ONES R SO CUTE I NEED MORE!!!!! maybe one where reader is having like a breakdown/ptsd flashback which results in them regressing involuntarily and mike comforts them? could be headcanons or a fic idrc :3

IM SO GLAD PEOPLE GET THE CG MIKE VISION… here is my attempt at writing something along those lines!!! I hope u enjoy nonnie <3

◞♡࿐

The Schmidt household was practically a second home to you. You crashed on the couch more often than not and even had a drawer full of your things in Mike’s room for easy access. Your living situation was less than ideal and you felt more comfortable with Mike and Abby than anyone else so it just worked out.

That’s how you found yourself outside their door one morning, knowing it would be just Mike at the house as Abby had already left for school. You used your key and offered a shaky smile to the sleepy man on the couch. “Hey.” He says at first, taking a few seconds to look up at you. When he finally does, his eyes widen at the tears running down your cheeks and he rushes towards you.

“What’s wrong, honey?” Mike asks, using his thumb to wipe under your eyes. You don’t answer but instead, you start to sob loudly. He’s definitely awake now, all his attention on you. He helps you the best he can to the couch so you can sit down. The second he sits down with you, you fling yourself into his arms and continue your breakdown.

Mike is quick to hold you, rubbing your back softly and whispering soothing things like “it’ll be okay” and “I’ve got you”. It helps more than he knows and the both of you sit there for what seems like hours.

When you begin to quiet down, you detach yourself from him and rub at your eyes. “Are you feeling any better?” Mike asks you and you nod lazily, a sudden tiredness washing over you. “T’ank you, Mikey.” The slurring and the nickname alerts Mike to the fact that sometime during your crying session, you slipped into littlespace.

You didn’t age regress too often, specifically around Abby. But Mike was always more than happy to take care of you when you did, especially when you were sad. “Of course, baby,” he uses his favorite nickname for you when you’re in that headspace, “how about we get you something to eat and drink and then you go take a nap?” He continues.

You nod again, “m’kay.” The idea of eating doesn’t sound too bad and you know you need to stay hydrated, even more so after crying. Mike grabs the television remote and turns on Abby’s favorite channel with all the cartoons. He gives you a kiss on your forehead and then hurries to the kitchen.

He and Abby had just had breakfast so he heats up the remaining pancakes and bacon, periodically checking on you. He slathers the pancakes with butter like he knows you like it and also cuts them up. Mike then delivers them to you on a plate.

You lighten up a bit at the food, starting to dig in as he goes to get you a glass of water. He comes back and sets it on the table in front of you. Before too long, you’ve finished your food and water and are back rubbing your eyes tiredly again.

“How about that nap?” Mike offers with a knowing smile. You nod and make grabby hands, indicating you want to be picked up. The man isn’t the most built but he works out enough to easily pick you up, knowing how much you like it when he does. You wrap your arms around his neck while he holds your thighs not too tight.

In a few seconds, you’re in Mike’s room and he deposits you carefully on his bed. He tucks you in so you’re nice and safe and comfortable. He’s about to turn away when you stop him. “Can we cuddle, please?” You ask and he already knows he’s not going to say no. He hums and slips into the bed, fortunately already in comfortable wear.

In the bed, you turn to face the wall opposite the door and Mike catches on, wrapping you up in his arms. Before he knows it, you and him fall asleep even with the sun peeking through the blinds at you both.

◞♡࿐

this was kinda therapeutic to write because ive been going through a tough time myself :( tysm for the request <3

#mine #text #my fanfics #sfw agere #sfw age regression #agere #age regression #mike schmidt #michael schmidt #mike schmidt x reader #mike schmidt x you #fnaf #fnaf movie #five nights at freddy's #five nights at Freddy’s movie #mike schmidt x male reader #mike schmidt x female reader #mike schmidt x gn!reader

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gyutopia · 2 months

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dried flowers | park jongseong

ꕤ DESCRIPTION: it’s always been jay, even all those years ago when you were fresh out of a relationship with your first love hueningkai. it was jay who was always there, the man who helped you find yourself again and showed you your worth, the man you could clearly picture a future with, the father of your twins. so why are you now having doubts about your marriage? it’s always been jay...hasn’t it?

ꕤ GENRE: fluff, nsfw, angst….

ꕤ WORD COUNT: 13.3k

⟶ WARNINGS: mean dom!jay, sub!reader, oral (f receiving), p in v intercourse, no protection, degradation, possessiveness, jealousy,, jay gets his heart broken, the park family is in shambles, mentions of cheating, slut shaming, knets hate u lol, mentions of depression and therapy.

❥ 𝑎/n: she’s been in the drafts for a while, decided to post while i work on my jake fic!

12:39am

There was a time in your life when you felt free and the world was full of possibilities...and him, especially him. You love your husband, you always have and you always will but a part of you can’t help but wonder if your life would be different had you given your first love a second chance. The circumstances surrounding your relationship with Hueningkai were far from ideal, an overly busy boyfriend who could never seem to make time for you and a short stay for your study abroad program. The odds really were never in your favor.

It also didn’t help that the two of you had completely different ideals and aspirations. You wanted to settle down at some point and have kids, you wanted the big wedding and the house at the end of the cul de sac but Kai wanted you and his music, nothing more. He didn’t believe in marriage, claiming he didn’t need a piece of paper to show you just how much he loved you.

He also wasn’t big on kids, coming from a somewhat big family himself and seeing how his parents marriage didn’t last and the pain he and his sisters endured when the divorce was finalized, he came to the conclusion he wouldn’t ever want to put someone he loves through that and swore off kids for good. His focus was his music career before anything else and he expected you to simply adjust to his hectic life and be content with being kept in the shadows. Your relationship really took a turn for the worst when he brought you to a party his label mates were throwing, everything went to shit that night.

The party resulted in a broken relationship, bloody nose and bruised knuckles and you pulling out of the SNU study abroad program the following week and returning back home to the states.

You don't even know what you’re doing thinking about Kai, it’s been years and you’re content with the life you lead now. You’re married to an amazing man who shows you each and every day just how much he loves you and the children you have together. Jay has never given you any reason to not trust him or even doubt him. So why are you now?

Jay is the kind of guy who actually enjoys dinners with your mess of a family, he stands on the train no matter how many seats are empty and somehow manages to be the most handsome yet humble man in any room. He’s your all time favorite person and you want to live a hundred years and die at the exact same moment so your souls can find each other on the other side as soon as possible and fall in love all over again.

So maybe you don’t regret picking Jay, you’re glad you did. Really, but you just can’t help but think: what if it had been Kai?

Would you be as happy as you are now? Would you have kids? Would you still be his dirty little secret or would he have told the press about you eventually?

You sigh in frustration and rub at your forehead. “It’s too early for this,” you mumble to yourself before standing from your bed and exiting the room.

You slide on your bedroom slippers and slip out of the master bedroom to head downstairs. You stop by the twins room and open the door just a bit to make sure they’re still sleeping. You smile softly when you find them passed out in their respective beds.

You shut the door and continue to pad down the hall and stairs into your kitchen to grab a mug and tequila. You pour yourself a cup and head into the backyard to sit on the hammock chair Jay had set up a month prior to you giving birth to the twins.

You place the tequila bottle by your feet and cradle your mug to your chest as you overlook your backyard. It’s a mess, there are toys scattered about and the play set Jay had installed with the help of his members sits proud and tall right smack dab in the middle of the mess.

You lean your head against the wood of the hammock and pull your phone out of the pocket of your robe. You can feel your eyes water as you scroll through your contact list searching for one specific person. Yujin.

The phone rings for a few seconds before she picks up.

“Hello?”

You let out a shaky laugh, “oh. Hi, you’re still up?”

She laughs. “Do you know who you’re talking to? My sleep schedule doesn’t exist. But I will say I’m surprised that you haven’t passed out yet. You know, being the mother of one year old twins can be very tiring.” You hear some commotion in the background before you hear the gentle shut of a door. “Why are you still up?”

You bite down on your bottom lip and play with the rim on your mug. “I can’t sleep.”

She hums, “hey, has Jay ever choked you? Because if he hasn’t he really should.”

You let out a scandalized gasp, “oh my gosh! You were with heeseung weren't you?”

She giggles and sighs into the phone, “he might have spent the night.”

You kick your feet and allow the hammock to swing, “oh wow. Was it that good?”

She hums eagerly, “yes it was. Maybe we should get married? Then he could do it for the rest of our lives.��

You nearly choke on the sip of tequila at her words. “I love that it takes asphyxiation to get you to settle down.”

She laughs as well, “please, you’re acting as if you didn’t marry Jay because of his, your words not mine, ‘monster cock’,”

You shrug your robe off and place the mug down, finally getting comfortable. “I don’t recall.”

She snorts, “of course you don’t. But moving on, are you going to tell me what’s really going on?”

You clear your throat and stare off into the distance. “I’ve been doing some...thinking..?”

You trail off as you try and think of how to phrase your next sentence. “A lot of thinking actually. About...him.”

Yujin hums in amusement, “ouu, who?”

You sigh and place your head in your hands. “Come on Yujin, you know who.”

Silence follows after your statement and you hang your head in shame.

“Are you kidding me?” Yujin takes a seat at her dining table and reprimands you. “Do not fuck up your gorgeous family.”

You shake your head adamantly, “I’m not.”

“You better not! Jay is such a good guy, _____!”

You sigh, “I know that!”

Yujin scoffs, “then appreciate it for a second, how lucky you are to have found him. Do you know how many millions of women would kill for what you have with him?”

“Look, I know that. B-but I just can’t stop thinking about how different things used to be!”

Yujin lets out a confused hum, “with Kai?”

“No...with me. I was different...I- I don’t know what happened.”

Yujin sighs, “you said yes, moved to the suburbs and had kids. This is what you wanted, _____. It was your choice.”

You groan in frustration. “I know that, Yujin! But I just, I-I need to feel it again!”

“Feel what?”

“Some small piece of that interconnected love rush you know? It was just-- it was such a high!”

“_____...I get it, Kai was out of this world for you but that kind of love is a fickle bitch. It hurts, it betrays and is ultimately unsustainable but what you have with Jay will go the distance. He really is the one for you.”

You close your eyes and lean back in the hammock. “I know.” You softly say, “I know it with everything in me.”

Yujin nods, forgetting that you can’t see her. “So what are you gonna do?”

You open your eyes when you hear Jay’s car pull up in the driveway. “I don’t know.” You properly sit up and collect your mug and tequila off the floor, “I have to go. Jay’s home.”

You don’t give her a chance to respond before hanging up and entering the kitchen through the back just as Jay walks in through the foyer. You dump the remaining liquor and place the bottle back in your drink cabinet.

“Hi, my love.” You feel Jay wrap his arms around your waist from behind and place a kiss on your collarbone. “Why are you still up?”

You finish washing up the mug and place it on the drying rack. “My mind won’t shut off.” you turn in his arms and wrap your own around his waist. He smiles at you and leans down to place his lips on yours for a quick peck but you pull him back in for a longer more meaningful kiss.

Loosely, his hand moves to grip your neck, as you lift your chin higher - so you can press your lips harder into his - while your hands fist into his shirt. His free hand drops to wind around your waist, and in one swift movement, he pulls your body flush against his. Gasping at the motion, Jay uses the opportunity to slip his tongue between your teeth, your lips parting further in response. Indolently, his soft appendage swipes across yours, curling around your tongue and gently massaging it.

Electrified by his kiss, you moan into his mouth, your chin lifting higher as you press your lips harder against his. Mouths moving in tandem, you lose yourself into the intoxicating feel of his lips against yours. The soft petals of his mouth are soft, and as pillowy as you remember; albeit a little chapped, but you don’t mind so much. No - because the slight abrasion only adds to the feel of your kiss.

When you feel his tongue flick against yours, your hands uncurl from his shirt - only to wind up his chest, along his throat, towards the nape of his neck. Further and further, you sink into Jay: his body pressed flat against yours, his saccharine taste coating your tastebuds, and his warm breath wafting over your face. You can’t help but find yourself drowning into him - his entire presence encasing your senses as you lose yourself deep into his entire being.

Both of you lose track of time, your tongues gliding and sliding against each other, both of you consumed wholly by the other. Lost in your own selves, you feel nothing but each other - want to feel nothing but each other - and soon, the rest of the world fades into the background. There’s a soft ache in your lungs - your chest aching from the lack of oxygen, but you don’t care. No - right now, breathing is the last thing on your mind. In fact, the only thing you can think of is Jay, and the intoxicating sensation of his tongue against yours.

Nonetheless, eventually, your lungs begin to burn - the lack of oxygen searing through your chest. When the sweltering ache grows too much to be ignored, the two of you pull away - breathing harshly against each other. Your eyes stay closed as you gasp for air, both your breaths mingling together and circulating the air. Your lips are slightly swollen, and as you flick out your tongue to soothe them, you can’t help but whimper at the aftertaste of his essence on your mouth: the flavor only deepened by his breath fanning your face.

With your eyes closed, you still feel him linger around you - his calming presence washing over you and soothing your earlier hurt. Swallowing thickly, the two of you gradually open your eyes - coming face to face with each other. You’re still only a hair's breadth away, his mouth ghosting against yours in tender brushes. Gaze meeting his, you search his eyes for something - anything - even just an inkling of the emotions you feel for him. And as usual, Jay doesn’t disappoint.

He smiles gently at you, the soft tip of his nose brushing yours as he repetitively presses affectionate kisses to your lips. “Not that I’m complaining but, what was that for?”

You place your head against his chest and lowly whisper into the night, “I love you.”

You wake up with a headache and the muffled sound of voices echoing from your living room all the way to the master bedroom. Groggily, you push yourself up off the bed and stare at the empty space beside you, realizing one of the voices belongs to Jay.

You vaguely remember him coming home last night after his meeting with his producer, your moment on the kitchen counter. How he carried you back upstairs and tucked you into bed beside him.

You hoist yourself off the bed and throw on the silk robe you had in the bathroom as you begin your morning routine of brushing your teeth and taking a shower. Trudging along the hallway to the living room after freshening up, you stumble upon a woman rounding the corner and walking up to you.

You think your eyes are deceiving you when you finally recognize who the jet black hair pulled up high into a sleek ponytail belongs to. “Oh sweetheart! You’re awake! Good morning.”

It’s Jay’s mother.

She pulls you into a hug and you blush. “I-I didn’t know you were visiting today.” You return the hug, “If I knew, I wouldn’t have—“

“Don’t be silly! We’re all allowed to drink once in a while!” Her eyes sparkle with her words, making you smile. She’s always been fond of her and was quite vocal about it. “Let’s get you some coffee, okay?'' Jay's mom leads you down the hallway, past the living room where you see Jay and his father engaging in what seems to be a serious conversation, and into the open kitchen where she ushers you to sit down. “The twins haven’t woken up yet, I was about to get started on their breakfast” She informs you when she catches you looking around. You hum and stir your still hot coffee.

Before you get to take a sip of the morning brew, you feel someone kiss your temple.

“Good morning, baby.” Jay whispers, placing his phone by your coffee mug, “Are you okay? Do you need aspirin?”

“I’m fine.” you sigh, stretching your neck to kiss his cheek before he straightens his back. His mother sets down another plate, filled with eggs and bacon, before ushering the men to sit.

“Let's eat!”

┕━━━━━━━✿━━━━━━━┙

Brunch goes by fast, small talk about your father in-laws' business is shared and pictures of your kids go around the table before goodbyes are bid with promises of lunch sometime soon. Retreating back into your home, Jay takes a seat on the couch and massages his temples with two fingers.

“Jay?” You worriedly ask, sitting beside him and placing your hand on his knee. There’s something unsettling about how it takes him a second to reply, staring at the glass coffee table with a stoic expression. You begin to retract your hand until he sighs and grabs it gently

He closes his eyes and smacks his lips together, “This morning… your previous relationship was broadcasted all over the news. I don’t know how they got the information but I’m doing everything I can to take it down.”

“Oh.” You blink, unsure of what to say or how to react. If anything, the headache you woke up with starts acting up again as you try to process what your husband had just said. The world knows about Kai. Even more, the world knows about your past relationship with him. You can only wonder how the media is painting you.

You think it’s something along the lines of a gold digger. First you get swept up in a whirlwind romance with an international superstar just to break things off and marry the son of one of South Korea’s biggest chaebols who just so happened to not only be friends with your ex but work with him as well. There’s definitely no saving your image now.

“I’m sorry.”

He frowns at your apology, tilting his head to the side. “What for?”

“About this mess, I’m sorry this is interfering with your image.”

“You did nothing wrong, love. I just hate how even after all these years Kai is still associated with you. It’s almost like you won’t be able to ever fully leave him in your past where he belongs.”

You want to reassure him that while yes, Hueningkai played a major role in your life, he’s the past. You want to tell him that it doesn’t matter because he’ll stay in your past but you can’t bring yourself to lie to your husband.

The truth is you don’t know where Hueningkai stands in your life at the moment and as sick and twisted as it sounds, if he were to show up at your doorstep right at this moment….you don’t know what you would do.

Jay turns to face you. “I don’t want you to think I don’t trust you, _____. That isn’t it, I swear. I just...I guess I just need the reassurance that Kai isn’t coming back. I’m secure with our relationship and I just want to know what you’re thinking, please don’t shut me out.”

You open your mouth to respond but nothing comes out, “u-uh...I-'' You're soon cut off by the wails of your twins over the baby monitor. You close your eyes and thank God for the distraction. “-I should probably go get them ready for their day and feed them. They have a playdate with Chaeyoung’s kids''

You abruptly stand and turn in the direction of the nursery. “You should get dressed for work, I’ll stop by the studio with lunch later for you and the guys.” You hesitate before turning back around to place a quick kiss on his lips. “I love you.”

After dropping off the twins and making a quick trip to the grocery store, you’re talking to Yujin over the phone about her taking her relationship with Heeseung to the next level when your phone chimes with a message from a number you should have blocked and deleted a long time ago. It’s Kai.

You block out Yujin’s words about her current issues and shakily reach for the device, scared to read the contents of his unprompted message.

2:33pm [hueningkai]: i’m sure you’ve seen the articles by now and i really am sorry if it put you in a difficult position with jay. i know you told me to delete your number and never reach out again but i don’t want you to hate me anymore than you already do _____.

2:33pm [hueningkai]: i’m not the one who sold the story to the press, i don’t know how it got out and i’m working really hard to get them taken down so please be patient and wait for me a little longer.

2:35pm [hueningkai]: i’ll make things right.

“I don’t want you to hate me anymore than you already do.” Your ears ring and your breath hitches as the phase catapults you into the past.

“_____.” he called in a breath.

He felt the panic rising. He wasn’t ready to confront you. From what Yeonjun had told him, you weren't doing great when you left the party last night. He told him how you had cried your eyes out on your way back home. Hueningkai had never seen you cry - apart from that time the two of you watched All The Bright Places together - you were always so cheery all the time, always in a good mood. In the past months you’ve been together you’ve never had a fight - you bickered continuously, yes, but never fought. You were always in sync, as if you could read each other’s minds. Hueningkai never felt such a connection with anybody else.

You were still looking at him. you looked at him and you saw the beautiful man you fell in love with tremble with fear. He was afraid of you. And in some way, you were scared of him too. you were scared of who he was, who he really was - because last night you had come to one conclusion: you don’t know Hueningkai. You thought you did, you thought you had learned enough of him in these past months, but you were wrong. He wasn’t the great, responsible and loving person you thought he was - because the man you thought you knew wasn’t capable of breaking your trust.

If there was something you were sure about it’s your worth. Your pride and tenacity were the qualities that allowed you to be where you were. You're intelligent, independent and determined. You had your moments, but you were strong, and you knew it. You knew that you didn’t do anything wrong to deserve his deception. You had cried your tears and felt the pain, but no more.

“I just want to know why.” you said, your voice a little bit too shaky for your liking.

Hueningkai closed his eyes hard, his head pounding. “_____ …”

“how long?” you pressed on.

The boy shook his head and took another shaky breath. He stood up and walked to her desk, trying to get some space between the two of them. He couldn’t think clearly.

Your eyes followed him without wavering. “You’re not going anywhere until you speak.”

Hueningkai was biting hard on his lower lip in the hope to cover up the pang in his chest. He didn’t want this. He cared about her. He loved her. But he knew, deep inside, that there was no going back from what he had done. There was no turning back from this terrible mistake.

“I ended things with her.” was all he could say.

“You clearly haven’t.” you responded in almost a clinical manner. “How long?” you repeated. “How long were you seeing her behind my back?”

The boy shook his head again, letting himself fall on the chair. “I wasn’t.”

The girl sighed, slowly getting angrier and impatient. “I saw you kiss each other yesterday. Please, be honest.”

“I-” he mumbled, struggling to find the words. “It wasn’t what it looked like.”

You couldn’t help but smirk. “Very cliché of you to say.”

“It really wasn't,” Hueningkai exclaimed, finding the courage to look at you before cowering back, seeing the disdain on your face. “It- It was after your first day back to classes after winter break.” he finally admitted.

You furrowed your brows, going back with your memories. “The day I learned I failed my bio final?”

He looked up to the ceiling, wishing he could turn back time. “Yes.”

You thought back to that day, the same day you noticed Yeji for the first time. They hugged, you remembered that day too. You didn’t think anything of it when it happened. It didn’t seem important to you.

Were you too naive?

“Did you have sex with her?”

He shook his head. “I...I don’t remember, I was drunk.”

“You were drunk.” you repeated. “Does it sound stupid only to me?”

“No.” he gulped. “It was stupid.”

You suddenly came to a realization. “The day after my math final,” you remembered. “You weren’t yourself …”

“You told me you fought with Bahiyyih.” You murmured in recognition.

“I didn’t.” Hueningkai responded, fingers through his hair. He wanted this torture to end.

You were feeling slightly nauseous. You were worried about him that morning, but he was fine only hours later. He had laughed with you during your lunch break. “And you decided it wasn’t worth … it wasn’t important enough?” you asked, your anger rising.

“I didn’t want to ruin anything!” the boy exclaimed in fervor, looking back at her again. “You still had three more finals to take and I didn't want t-”

“So you went on with it.” you interrupted. “As if nothing had happened.”

“I didn’t want to-”

To what?” you raised your voice. “To what Hueningkai? To lose me?” you laughed a cold laugh that made the boy quiver. “That’s bullshit and you know it. And then what? You continued seeing her? Those weeks we couldn’t see each other because of your schedule, you were with her, weren’t you?” you accused him in one breath, thinking about how distant he had been.

Hueningkai was petrified. He was unable to speak against your claims, he wanted to but his throat was constricted. He could feel you slipping away by the minute and he was unable to stop you. He was losing something important, and it was all his fault.

Your breath had turned labored with the realization of how foolish you had been. Four months of lies. You couldn’t believe you fell for all of it, that you fell for him.

What was it _____? Was it his looks? Was it his personality? What about him rendered you so stupid?

Hueningkai couldn’t stop looking at you now. You were sitting on the edge of your bed with your head down and your hands on your knees, your knuckles taught. He wished he could avert his gaze again but something inside him wanted to masochistically remember this moment. He could feel his heart pounding in his chest and his own hands trembling inside the pocket of his jeans, where he had hidden them. If he didn’t know himself better, he could swear his eyes were starting to sting. What happened to him?

You finally take a trembling breath, as if you were trying to compose yourself and not cry. You looked him in the eyes with all the courage you could gather and finally spoke the words he had been secretly preparing himself to hear. “I never thought I could hate someone as much as I hate you. I hate you, Hueningkai. With all my heart.”

“_____? Are you even listening to me?”

You shake your head as the memory comes to pass, trying to get your head out of the daze. “Y-yeah, sorry. Chaeyoung sent me a video of the twins but I promise you have my complete undivided attention.” You lie. Why did you feel the need to hide this from your best friend?

“Oh, it’s okay. I have to go anyway, gotta wrap up my thesis.”

You bid her goodbye and wish her luck with her thesis for her PhD program before hanging up. You stand in silence in the middle of your kitchen as your mind cooks up every reason why texting Hueningkai back is wrong and downright disrespectful to Jay but a part of you itches to see what would happen if you did. Would the part of you you feel is missing come back?

2:40pm to: [hueningkai]: i believe you.

You quickly exit the messages app and shut off your phone to finish packing the boys lunches. You individually wipe down each lunch box and place them neatly in the large lunch bag you had found at Costco a while back. You make sure to pack a few snacks and a sealed platter of fruits for them as well.

You’re back in the car with a few minutes to spare from the time frame you gave yourself, the members warmed up tteokbokki perched on the passenger seat as you pull out of the driveway to your destination. You’re there in no time; there wasn’t much traffic around 4PM.

You park the Mercades in the assigned spot for workers and their family members. You make sure to grab your purse and lunch bag before you enter the elevator to head to the main floor. You greet the security guard; who had remembered you from your previous visits, greeting you as ‘Mrs. Park.’

Bashfully, you bow to him as he lets you pass and make your way to the elevator and ride up to the 10th floor.

Jaebeom, the group's manager, recognizes you the second you step out of the lift and stands up from his seat, “_____! Perfect timing! The boys just wrapped up their dance practice.”

“amazing!.” You beam as you follow him down a corridor. Some employees look up from their work to glance at you; recognition in their eyes.

Enhypen’s practice room is such a large space with multiple glass windows allowing you to see all over. He’s sat on the floor beside Jake, fingers supporting his forehead as he reads something off a piece of paper.

Jaebeom knocks on the open door and pokes his head in, “boys, you have a visitor.”

You watch as their heads snap up simultaneously to see who has stopped by.

Jay puts whatever he was reading down and stands up, “_____? What are you doing here?”

Jaebeom quietly excuses himself and you whisper words of gratitude as he leaves before stepping further into the dance room.

“I promised to drop off lunch,”holding up the lunchbox you made for them. “I can’t have my husband and dear friends starving.”

The boys all cheer and abandon their previous work to come crowd you by the door. Sunoo takes the heavy lunch bag off your shoulder and happily skips to the middle of the practice room with the members following behind. Jay walks up to you, kissing your forehead, “You really didn’t have to. We could have ordered-”

“But you weren’t, were you?” You scowl, “Come on, let’s fill that belly up.”

He leans forward to whisper in your ear, “I’d rather eat you.”

You gasp, instinctively reaching your hand out to hit his shoulder, but he catches it instead and interlocks your fingers together. “Stay and eat with us?”

Your heart melts at the gesture and you inwardly chastise yourself for even ever thinking about someone else when you have a husband as caring and loving as Jay.

You shake your head gently, “I already ate, plus I have to go pick up the twins soon.” You stand on your tiptoes to place a chaste kiss on his lips, “you should go join the boys before they eat your half as well. I’ll see you at home?”

He whines and leans in for one more kiss, “at least let me walk you to the car?”

You shake your head firmly this time. “I can walk myself to the car, Jay. Go enjoy your lunch, I’m sure your body’s dying for some nutrients. I’ll call you as soon as I get back home.”

You kiss him goodbye and say your farewells to the members before exiting the large dance room. You walk down the corridor not paying attention to your surroundings, you’re in your own little world thinking about how your life has seemed to turn to shit overnight when you hear the faint calling of your name.

Your eyes wander about until they fall onto a lone male standing in front of the lift. Blinking at him, you couldn’t believe your eyes when his profile registers in your head.

Your lips have parted in a mixture of dread and astonishment. You haven’t seen him in almost a decade since you left and returned to Korea. All at once, the memories you’ve shared together come flooding back and you don’t notice you’re staring at him; not even when your phone starts buzzing in your hands.

Your eyes meet and in those few seconds you’re able to see that he’s out of his awkward puberty stage; that he’s finally matured into a man his label had been shaping him up to be. He wasn’t scrawny like before, but he wasn’t ‘soft-looking’ either; he looked lean and in good shape. The faintest shadow under his eyes tells you that touring and practicing must have been shit to him but he was still handsome as ever.

“_____?” The way he says your name hits you with nostalgia. He’s still soft-spoken, but you can’t really imagine him having such a stern voice.

Finally coming to your senses, you take a deep breath and fake a chuckle. “Kai,” You gulp, “Hey.”

“It’s been so long! Wow, you look great.”

It takes a second for his compliment to register in your head as you’re still in shock at seeing him again. “Y-yeah, you too. H-how are you?”

“I’m good, the group’s doing well so not much to complain about.” his eyes shift a bit as he clears his throat. “Congratulations, by the way. I saw on the news, and overheard the other members talking… about your wedding and twins.”

Instinctively, you look down at your hand; to your wedding band. “Ah, yeah. Thanks.”

“I’m glad you’re happy, _____.”

Not knowing what to reply, you nod your head, “Uhm, so what about you?”

He lets out a sad chuckle, “No luck. Touring the world doesn’t really give me that much time to socialize. I’m always on the go.”

“Not even groupies?”

“I guess I'm just not interested in them.” Kai shrugs with a half smile on his face, displaying how chiseled his face was. “Still caught up on an ex.”

You shiver at his words, “still caught up on an ex.” were you by any chance said ex? You slightly shake your head. It shouldn’t matter if it’s you. You’re married and a mother, you can’t betray your husband like that and put your family at risk. Whatever lingering feelings you’re holding on to need to be dealt with and put aside. Kai isn’t someone worth losing your family over.

Before you can reply, suddenly, someone steps beside you, pressing a kiss on your temple and wraps their arms around your waist tightly, making your blood run cold. Looking up, Jay smiles sweetly at you but gives the complete opposite glance at Kai. “You dropped your wallet, love.”

You clear your throat and nod, “thank you.” You unravel his arm from your body and take your wallet from his free hand. “I should really get going now. It was nice seeing you again Kai.” You offer him a tight lipped smile and move to walk past him but Jay grabs onto your hand and intertwines your fingers. “Let me walk you to the car.” You turn to look at him ready to tell him it’s not necessary but the way he says it makes it sound like a command and the way he stares at you shows there’s no room for disagreement. He nods his head in acknowledgement at Huening before walking past him, purposely bumping shoulders with him. You outwardly cringe at the clear jealousy in his eyes and show of masculinity. The two of you enter the elevator in silence, you hate how tense the atmosphere has become. Jay squeezes your hand one last time before releasing it.

He lets out a deep sigh, nodding, “do you still love him?”

You blink up at Jay, hands clasped together to stop them from shaking. Do you still love Kai? You always thought you did during your freshman year, but never really thought about it again when you left. When Jay came into the picture, you knew you loved him - probably more than you did Kai, but were you just going to disregard your entire past with Kai?

“He only meant something to me before, you know that.” You could hear your own heartbeat thumping from your chest as you anticipate his next words.

“You look at him the way I look at you.” He turns his head to face you, “you look at him the way I wished you would look at me when we first started dating. Like he holds the whole universe in his eyes.” He gulps as he clenches his fists, “you look at him like you’re in love with him.”

You wipe your clammy hands against your jeans as Jay's words ring in your ears. Do you really look at him like that?

“You’re not even going to deny it?” he scoffs and glares down at your shorter figure. “This morning you couldn’t even tell me that he’s a part of your past, G-God! I should have known!”

You shake your head, “Jay..”

He only speaks over you. “Why are you still hung up on that piece of shit? Are you forgetting everything he put you through? Why aren’t I enough for you? No- fuck that, why isn’t the life we’ve built together enough?”

You reach out to grab his hand, praying he doesn’t pull away. To your relief and mild shock, he doesn’t. “It is! It’s more than enough, Jay! I-I love you, and the twins. I can’t picture my life without the three of you!”

He nods and grips your hand back with the same ferocity you’re holding on to his. “Okay, then look me in my eyes and tell me you don’t love him anymore.”

You lick your lips and look down at the ground. You know what your answer should be yet that’s not what it is and you’ve never lied to your husband. You’re not going to start now.

“I-I don’t know what I feel for him.”

You’re heartbroken by your own admission, but even more so with how Jay releases a deep sigh and your hand; brows meeting at the middle of his forehead as he rips his gaze away from you. You could see his hands ball up into fists against his sides. His breathing is deep and slow; his tongue slowly licking across his bottom lip.

You should say something; explain it further to him. “J-”

The elevator dings and the doors separate. You sniff to hold in your tears as new people enter the lift.

“You should go. The twins are waiting.”

Your head snaps to look at Jay but he makes it a point to avoid your gaze. “B-but you said you would walk me to the car.”

He slowly shrugs. “It’s not like you wanted me to. Besides, being around you right now is too painful. I’ll see you at home.”

The elevator doors close with one last ding and your husband is whisked back up to the 10th floor leaving you all alone in the middle of the reception area crowded by HYBE staff. You try your best to contain your tears as you rush back to the parking garage. You shoot Chaeyoung a text to let her know you’ll be late to pick up the kids, when she lets you know that it’s alright you toss your phone and book it out of the parking lot.

You know you shouldn’t be driving while so high on emotions but you can’t stay anywhere near that fucking building.

Not wanting to go home to silence, you drive to your second safe place. Where you know you won’t be judged and your worries seemingly just melt away.

You frantically knock on the door to Yujin’s home, wondering what the fuck was taking her so long to open the damn door.

“Who is it?”

You choke on a sob and seize your rapid knocking, “i-it’s me”

“_____?”

You nod and resume your knocking, “just let me in!” You hear the click of the lock coming undone before the door swings open and Yujin steps aside to let you in. She takes in your frantic appearance and takes cautious steps towards you, not wanting to set you off even more.

“Hey, what’s wrong?”

You place your right hand over your chest as you wheeze, finding it hard to breathe. “I really fucked up.”

You slap a palm over your mouth when a loud sob comes out of your mouth.

Before your body starts to fold as you fail to control your sobbing, Yujin’s arms are around you, encasing your frame against her chest. There’s no point in pushing her away. You’re tired in every aspect and it feels like the only thing to relieve you of that stress is to cry it out.

Your knees give in so suddenly, catching her off guard that she stumbles back a little; balancing your weights until she has both your bodies settled on the floor with her back against the white wall.

“It’s going to be okay,” she shushes you gently and strokes at your back as you sob into her clothes. She allows you to cry to your heart's content and calm down before asking you if you’re ready to speak on what’s caused you to break down.

“I should have listened,” you whine, shaking your head in disbelief. “I should have listened to you when you told me to leave it alone, I-I don’t know why I didn’t!”

“What happened, _____?”

You look up at her with watery eyes. “I really fucked up Yujin…” She sighs and adjusts the way she’s sitting.

“I can’t help you if I don’t know what’s wrong, love.”

You sniff and play with the hanging thread on your shirt. “I...I saw Kai today.” You timidly look into Yujin’s eyes, searching for any judgment in them but her face is passive. “I went to drop off lunch for Jay and the boys and ran into him on my way out.”

“Was that...the first time you’ve seen him since what went down?” Yujin softy asks.

You nod, “it was too painful to face him when I came back and Jay just hated me being near him so I guess I always made it a point to avoid him at all functions I knew he would be at.”

Yujin nods, “did something else happen?”

You close your eyes and bite down on your bottom lip, “an article dropped this morning about my past relationship with Kai and Jay asked me if Kai really was in my past but I dodged the question...he also saw Kai and I together and asked me privately if I...if I still love him.”

Yujin’s eyebrows shoot up, “...and what did you say?”

You scratch your neck and open your eyes, “I told him I don’t know what I feel for him.”

A heavy silence falls over the two of you as Yujin goes over your words. “What the actual fuck, _____?”

You sigh. “I know, I know I fucked up, okay? But Yujin these past few months I haven’t felt like...like myself.” You wipe your nose and try to find the right words. “I’m not saying I don’t love Jay, because I love that man with everything in me but when I think back to Kai-before everything went to shit it feels like everything’s normal again.”

“When I saw him today, it’s like something clicked. I felt like the old me again, for a brief second everything seemed clear and like the haze that I’ve been in ever since the twins turned six months just- vanished!”

Yujin waits for you to finish your rant before she gives you her opinion on the topic. “I don’t think this was ever about Kai.”

You look at her questioningly, “what..?”

Yujin sits up and reaches for your hands. “I should have paid more attention to you when you called me that night, _____. Everything you said then and now...it’s clear. This isn’t about Kai, you don’t miss him or your past relationship with him. You miss the person you used to be when you were with him.”

You shake your head, “n-no.”

Yujin cuts you off and goes on, “-Everything you’ve said- reminiscing on the past, who you were, feeling like a part of you was missing? _____, you’re so focused on Kai and what could have been because you never got the proper closure for what happened. He betrayed you in one of the worst ways and left you with so many unanswered questions. Now that you’ve moved on and experienced a new you, you’re finally having the chance to reflect on the version of yourself that you lost and never got to properly say bye to.”

She reaches for your hand, “...it also sounds like you might be dealing with postpartum depression. It doesn’t kick in until 6 months, maybe even a year after birth. And before you disagree, it’s not just not being able to bond with your kids, it’s feeling lost and hopeless, heightened anxiety...wishing you were someone else.”

You feel as if a weight lays heavy on your shoulders as you process her words. Postpartum depression? The way she gingerly explains it makes it easier to understand and process. It makes everything you’ve been dealing with more clear, your conflicting thoughts and feelings for Hueningkai finally seem to fall into place.

“I-I think you might be right, I definitely need to sort things out with Jay and schedule an appointment with my therapist but thank you for being here for me.”

Yujin softly smiles, “I hope you do actually schedule that meeting with your therapist. Don’t prolong this, and I’m sure Jay will come around. Just explain everything and be truthful. You know he can’t stay mad at you.”

You open your mouth to correct her but your phone buzzes in your pocket before you get the chance. You take it out and see a notification from Sunoo. You open the message and see a link to a website. The header for the article leaves you winded.

Hueningkai of TXT issues a personal letter regarding his past relationship stating he’s still in love with his ex.

You don’t bother reading the attached message Sunoo sent and slap Yujin’s arm to get her attention. She looks over your shoulder and gasps as she skims the article as well.

Hueningkai’s apology:

Moa~ recently it has come to light about a past relationship of mine. I’m sorry for belatedly relaying news of said relationship now but I can not apologize for being a normal teenager and wanting to experience the thrill of a relationship.

I don’t know how the media was able to get a hold of such private information and I sincerely apologize to those who were caught in the crossfire.

It’s true that my past lover is Park _____, the wife of my label mate. If there’s anyone who deserves a sincere apology, it’s her. She has done nothing to warrant the hate she has been receiving, people have been making attacks on her morals, character and parenting skills. All of which have nothing to do with the situation at hand, she is an exceptional being and an even greater mother.

We have not engaged in an affair of any type, I have only met with her once, today being the first in nearly eight years.

However, I can not lie and say I haven’t missed her. Seeing her in person today reinforced my feelings, I never once stopped loving her.

I’ve caused her an immense amount of pain and a lifetime worth of trust issues and I can only hope one day she forgives me. But until then, I’ll do everything in my power to right my wrongdoings.

-Hueningkai.

“What the fuck.” You whimper, how could he do this? His ‘apology’ did nothing but add more fuel to the fire. You can only imagine how Jay is reacting to this. You pray he hasn’t made any reckless decisions.

You scroll down to the comments to see how it’s being received by the public.

omo he’s so brazen 💀 +366

she’s a married woman with children...this is a bit…. +987

she’s really been passed around 😭 -217

i wonder just how many more hybe men she’s slept with +38

he’s only made her seem cheap ㅠㅠ -21

i wonder what her husband is thinking… +765

it sounds as if he cheated… +92

i wonder why they called things off if he’s still in love with her 🤔 +10

8...years..? (°_°) -65

“The internet thinks I’m a whore.”

Yujin reassuringly pats your back, “they don’t know anything and you don’t owe them an explanation.”

You shut off your phone, “that’s not the point, Yujin. i’m being slut shamed and vilified because my ex doesn’t know when to keep private information private and my husband’s pissed off with me and this probably made it worse!”

“Then talk to him, _____. He’s rightfully upset because you still don’t know how to properly communicate with him even after all these years. It’s not too late to fix things with Jay and this whole Kai situation will work itself out once you work things out at home.”

You sigh, maybe she’s right? “I should get going, I still have to pick up the kids and make dinner. I’ll let you know how things go once I talk to Jay.”

You say your goodbyes before leaving to go to Chaeyoung’s home to pick up your babies.

It isn’t until 9:30pm do you finish with your household chores. You made sure to feed and wash up the twins, cook dinner for both you and Jay, clean the kitchen and catch up on laundry. You even made it a point to clean Jay's home office for him.

He doesn’t get home for another three hours. He walks right past you and barely acknowledges your presence. He checks in on the twins who are fast asleep and gets himself ready for bed. You try and get him to talk to you, to say anything but he only tells you he’s tired and falls asleep facing away from you for the first time ever in your relationship.

┕━━━━━━━✿━━━━━━━┙

Three days pass by of the cold shoulder from Jay. He makes it a point to wake up before you and leave early in the mornings for work. On the rare occasion you happen to wake up before him however, he takes his time in getting ready to avoid having to sit down for breakfast with you and simply kisses the twins goodbye before murmuring out an I love you in your direction and leaving.

Simply put, you’re over it. You want your clingy and loving husband back. Luckily for you, today’s Sunday The one day you know is promised for you. He doesn’t have studio time on Sunday’s because you all go to your in-laws to have a family brunch and come back home for a weekly reset. Granted he slept in today and you missed brunch but you still have a chance to make things right. You asked your parents to babysit for you so you would have the house to yourselves for a bit. That way all the pent up anger can finally come out without the fear of upsetting the kids.

“Where are the twins?”

You look up from your tablet where you have been outlining points you want to make during your conversation with him.

“I had my parents come get them while you were sleeping.”

He sighs, “why?”

You fiddle with the apple pen in your hands, “because we need to talk and we can’t do that if we have to censor our words because our kids are in the house.”

He stares at you blankly for a second before shaking his head. “I don’t have much to say to you, _____.”

You sigh and push aside the iPad, “yes you do. Just get it off your chest Jay! This marriage won’t work if you keep avoiding me and keep your emotions bottled up!”

He slams his hands down on the kitchen counter and huffs, “what the fuck do you want me to say, _____?” He looks at you furiously, chest rising erratically. “That I’m pissed off with you? That I feel like I can’t trust you anymore? That I feel like you never even loved me?” Your heart breaks as you listen to his rant but you don’t stop him, you need to let him get it off his chest in order to actually heal and move on from this.

“I was the one who was there for everything, I’m the one you came to when you returned to Korea! Hell I’m even the one who put everything on the line for you when I found out what he did to you! And yet, you were still in love with him. You couldn’t even pretend to be half as in love with me as I was with you when we first started dating. So yeah, I’m pissed off that now, years later- as my wife, you still can’t open up to me the way you opened up to him within four months of dating.”

You sniff and nod. “I do love you, Jay. I always have and y-yeah, maybe I wasn’t upfront with my feelings for you when we first got together but that doesn’t change anything!”

“But it does! It does change everything, _____! Do you know what it feels like to know you’ll never be enough for the person you love? It feels like fucking hell! And that stupid article didn’t make things any better!”

You stand from your seated position to embrace him but he only shakes his head and backs away. “J-jay, that article has nothing to do with what I feel for you! I’m sorry I keep hurting you, I’m sorry I’ve put us in this position but you have to trust me when I say that Huening really is in my past!”

“How am I supposed to trust you when you’ve given me every reason not to.” He blinks away his tears and clears his throat. “I need to work on some lyrics for our new album. I’ll be in my office.” Jay exhales, walking around the counter and past you.

“B-but it’s Sunday.”

Both of you promised each other that as much as possible, Sundays are days off. Unless it’s extremely urgent, neither of you are allowed to work.

“It’s still Saturday in Seattle.” And without another word he retreats to his home office

Confused and guilty, you don’t know what to do in your own home. It takes about ten minutes for you to gather your bearings and finish up the dishes from breakfast. You can’t even think of coherent thoughts, mindlessly doing the chore until you’re finished and feel lost again with what you could do. After another five minutes pass, you decide to head to the bathroom and sit in the bathtub for an hour.

Once you dry off from your bath, you apply your usual skincare and opt out of putting on any makeup aside from some lip balm. You spritz on a little perfume and get dressed in some gym shorts that hug your butt and a loose fitting top before heading back downstairs to the kitchen to make Jay a plate of food to bring to him, praying that by now he’s cooled off a bit.

As carefully as you can, you quietly walk over to where his home office is and peer through the crack. You want to roll your eyes at what you see; Jay slumped back on his couch, his game console controller in his hands, and an annoyed, but focused expression on his face as he stares at the fifa game he had going on.

“lyric writing, my ass.” You mutter, knocking on the door to alert him before opening it. “I brought you some lunch.”

“Thanks. Just leave it there.” Jay mumbles, still concentrating on his game as he nods his head towards his coffee table.

Your heart drops; he didn’t even spare you a glance. You set the plate to where he gestured and start making your way out until he grabs your hand. You flinch at his sudden action, turning your head to meet his piercing gaze.

He blinks up at you, anger clearly in his eyes, he slowly stands up and discards the controller on his seat. You’re starting to feel small when he’s towering above you. After a long stare-off, he breaks the silence, “Where’s your ring?”

You look down at your hand and it only hits you now that you forgot to put your ring back on after you finished your skincare. “In the bathroom; I took it off to do my skincare.”

He’s breathing deeply; the strength of his hand around your wrist varies.

You take this as an opportunity, while his attention is on you. “Jay please” You don’t know what it is you want from him so you do what seemed like the best choice; you step closer and kiss him.

He doesn’t respond though; just closing his eyes in response.

“Jay.” You whine, running your hands up his arms and tiptoeing to kiss him once more, but his hand comes up to your neck and holds you in place, making you gasp in shock.

“How far did you two go?”

You grow flustered with his question; wanting to run away but his gentle hold on your neck keeps you planted. “Jay…”

He dips his head down, ghosting his breath over your cheek. “Surely, you two kissed. Probably made out, right? Was he any good?”

“Not as good as you-”

Jay scoffs and pulls away, dragging his thumb across your bottom lip deliberately, “You don’t have to stroke my ego sweetheart so answer my question.”

You shift uncomfortably. “I-I don’t know. I guess?”

He purses his lips briefly before clicking his tongue. His eyes drag down your body, tracing a path with his palm, “Did you ever get touchy with each other? Any below the belt touching?”

You can feel your arousal growing as he applies a bit of pressure to your neck, “Jay, I-”

“Just answer the question, baby.” He hushes, racing his free hand up to your chest, palming one of your breasts. “Did he do this to you?”

“Yes.” You whimpered, arching your body towards him; desperate for more.

“And being the little slut that you are,” He pulls you closer to growl into your ear, “I bet you liked it, doll?”

He flips you around, pinning you to the door and presses his erection into your ass. He still has a hand on your right breast, kneading it a little more roughly now. You loudly moan at the sudden turn of events, putting your hands flat against the wall to stop him from completely crushing you against it.

His left hand begins to travel dangerously low on your stomach while his hips are still rutting against yours, “Did his hands ever touch you here?”

“No.” You resolutely denied, “you’re the only one.”

He hums in approval, but his hands are back on your breasts, which makes you whine again.

“Please touch me.”

Ignoring your request, he kisses your neck, “So that’s all you did?”

You moan and nod your head adamantly. Jay steps away from you, cold air intruding the warmth his body provided. You impatiently look back at him, wondering why he pulled away.

Jay releases you completely and kneels before pulling down your shorts causing you to gasp at the cold air that hits your clit.

Jay lets out a hum of approval. “Spread those legs for me, Kitten,” he says - though from the domineering tone, you know it’s more of an order. Without question you obey. The moment your legs are splayed wide. Large hands spread your thighs further before Jay presses his head between - then, he tentatively presses his tongue to your clit.

“Ah-” you gasp out, your hips automatically bucking into his face at the roughness of his tongue. Once again, he chuckles before licking a swipe from your cunt all the way to your ass. Your back automatically arched, pushing your hips further into his face. Jay teases you with a couple more kitten licks before pushing his tongue into your dripping hole, swirling his tongue around and collecting all your arousal on his tongue. He laps deep into you, thrusting his tongue in and out, palming his cock as you ride his face. Gently suckling on your clit, Jay presses his nose to your clit, expertly locating your g-spot and causing vibrations of pleasure to strum along them. Your vocal cords strained, voice cracking as you let out another cry. You feel your pussy walls ripple, abdomen twisting into a wrenching knot inside of you as he continues lapping your clit.

You simply can’t catch your breath, your head lolling helplessly to the side as your shoulders slump. You quickly feel your orgasm approach, the knot in your stomach twisting even further as Jay drives you to the brink of pleasure. Your hips move instinctively, grinding your pussy against his eager face as Jay buries it deeper between your thighs.

“I’m- oh gosh I’m going to cum” You warn, voice raspy and throat raw. You breathe deeper, gasps turning into low moans as your body seizes up, eyes rolling deep into the back of your skull as you come around his skillful tongue. Jay feels you gush around his mouth and lets up a bit to catch his breath before diving back as he licks and swallows up all of your cunt juice. You try to push him away, thighs still quivering as he continues eating you out. You squeal, the overstimulation of your orgasm paired with his continued ministrations driving you wild.

You feel him pull away, exhaling as your pussy finally has some relief. However, it doesn’t last long before suddenly Jay stands and grabs the back of your neck to pull you into a sloppy kiss, all wet from your saliva. You respond immediately; hands flying to his shoulders and hoisting yourself up on his body, prompting him to carry you by your thighs.

“You’re so fucking spoiled.” He groans. He reaches from below to push his pants down and slips his shaft in.

A moan erupts from your throat; his length slipping in easily with your arousal. You cling onto his shoulders, burying your face in the crook of his neck as he starts pounding into you with immense force. You’re moaning in pleasure when his hands are practically clawing at your hips, ramming himself deeper and deeper.

Jay slowly makes his way out of his office making his way to what you assume is your bedroom but stops at the foot of the staircase and gently places you down on the first few steps, his dick not once leaving you. He puts you down to spin you around and enters you from behind; you’re convinced that your hips are bruised at how his fingers are digging into them to help him control the pace

“Jay.” You moan, barely holding yourself up by your forearms. You reach beneath you to try and stimulate your clit, wanting just a little more something to climax.

He stops you from touching yourself, grabbing both your wrists and holds them behind you. He’s pushing all of his weight up into you, practically lying on top of you. His skin is hot and sweaty, sliding against your back.

It’s almost too much - the pleasure, the emotions, and the love you feel. Your heart begins palpitating in your chest, beating so hard and fast that your chest begins to ache. “Jay,” you whine, the sound high-pitched as you squeal from his ministrations, “I’m cumming,” you whimper though, Jay doesn’t need the warning. He already knows your orgasm is impending, from the way your thighs begin shaking and the way your walls clamp around him.

“Ah. AH- AH! Jay!” you finally sob. Your peak hits a crescendo, and your orgasm ricochets through you with more force than you expected. Jay groans, feeling your pussy ripple uncontrollably around his cock before tightening. Your walls contract rhythmically, and suddenly, his hips still as he begins cumming.

Rope after rope of Jay’s cum slowly fills you. His warmth practically burns inside you, coating your walls white and claiming every single piece of you as his. His cum spills out of you once he pulls out and he rests his forehead on your shoulder as both of you catch your breaths, rolling off of you.

Soon, you’re turning to face him. You lean in and place a kiss on his lips, this time he responds to it; opening his mouth so you could slip your tongue in.

Without breaking off the kiss, he sits up and cradles one side of your face with his hand.

“I’m sorry.” He quietly says in between kisses.

“I’m sorry, too.” You curl up into his chest as he leans back on the bannaster. “I should have just been honest from the start. You deserve to know.”

Jay combs back your hair for you, “You don’t have to talk about it today.”

“No. I don’t want to put it off any longer.”

“Okay, let’s get cleaned and dressed first.” He kisses your cheek before standing, helping you up as well.

Jay helps you clean up and carries you up the stairs to bring you into your shared room, he wipes you down with a warm cloth and dresses you in his boxers and oversized graphic before leaving to enter the bathroom to clean himself up as well to get dressed.

Five minutes later, Jay is back and clothed; sporting another plain tee and boxers. Sitting beside you, he patiently waits for you, angling his body to face yours.

“When you asked me if he was a part of my past I should have told you what I was thinking instead of avoiding the topic,” You pick at the bedsheets, “Kai and I were always complicated, and I can’t say I miss that or him but I do miss who I was before I lost him.”

You sigh, “these past few months have been hard and I should have told you when I first started feeling less like myself. I guess I thought it was all in my head and I didn’t want you to think it was you… I love you and what I feel for Kai-”

Jay tips his head at your sudden pause.

“What I felt for Kai, is nowhere near what I feel for you. He’s a part of my past and..,” You shake your head, “and I’m sorry for being so shady about it. I don’t look at Kai the way I look at you, I never can because I don’t love him. And it’s something that’s taken me time to realize but, I don’t miss Kai. I miss who I used to be when I was with him, before he ruined that.”

“I’m sorry I hurt you in the process of trying to figure out my shit but I can assure you that no part of me is in love with him. I’ve been feeling differently and it’s not because of anything you did or said,” You nervously laugh, “I talked to Yujin about it and she totally went all psychologist on me, but she thinks this is all stemming from a larger problem… she thinks I might have postpartum depression..”

He lifts his hand to your cheek to wipe away a stray tear you didn’t even know fell from your eye. “Postpartum depression?”

“Mmmh. My issues are stemming from my inability to let go of who I used to be to allow myself to be who I am now.” You inhale as deep as you can and exhale with an awkward laugh, “I booked a therapy session with Dr. Lee for Tuesday, we’ll know more then.”

Jay pulls you to him, kissing your forehead, “I’m sorry for not paying closer attention. I’m even more sorry that I’ve been such a jackass to you recently.”

“I should have communicated better.”

“Yes, you should have but as your husband I shouldn’t have missed the signs. I’m so sorry baby.”

You lean into him, slinging your arms over his shoulders. “Are we okay?”

He smiles softly and nods. “Of course we are.”

He grins, nose scrunching at how you curl up like a cat to cuddle his chest. You run your fingers over his hair, slowly and repeatedly, reciprocating the little smile splayed on his face. His lips are on your shoulders and neck, softly sucking on patches of your skin and murmuring sweet nothings.

“I love you.”

You’re sat on the couch in your living room with Jay and his publicist with a random kdrama playing faintly in the background while the twins take their afternoon nap upstairs. It’s been a week since Hueningkai’s apology dropped and the press and fans are still raving over it.

There are protests outside HYBE demanding Hueningkai be pulled out of further TXT promotions indefinitely while some fans are still shading you and your integrity on Twitter. You never imagined your life would become such a hot topic yet here you are.

“We need to satiate the media,” Jay’s publicist, Jaemin, places down his coffee on the coaster in front of him and clears his throat, “I’ve talked it over with your manager, members and the CEO himself. We believe a statement from the two of you and the third party is a good way to clear the air and show to the public that there is no animosity or anything scandalous going on.”

You feel Jay squeeze your hand as he mulls over what has been said. “Why a statement? Where would it be posted? Is this really the best option?”

You pat his knee and chuckle at him, “what is this? 20 questions? At least let the man get a word in.”

Jay sighs and turns to face you. “I’m sorry, it’s just… the press has been slandering you all week and I don't want this statement to fuel that fire.”

Jaemin nods. “I understand your want to protect your wife from the malicious comments being made online and I can assure you that we will be reading all drafts and making edits as needed so it can’t be interpreted in a different way.”

Jay wearily looks at Jaemin before looking back at you. “I...I’m all for it only if you’re comfortable with it, love.”

You look at the two boys and ponder the possible outcomes. “I think we should do it. It’ll clear any and all tension and we can all finally move on.”

Jaemin smiles and stands, fixing his suit he says. “Great. I’ll leave you two then, send your final drafts to me and they’ll be revised, sent back over to you to read one last time before being posted on Weeverse. Your manager should be in touch soon, Jay.”

You and Jay stand as well to see him out. You thank him for his time and watch him drive away before going back inside.

“You’re awfully quiet… Do you want to talk about it?” You ask once you’re seated back on the couch. Jay spares you a glance before sighing and placing his hands on his knees.

“I know I said I would support your decision no matter what it was but.. are you sure you can handle this, _____? That it won’t be triggering for you?”

You purse your lips as you stare at his side profile. “I’m not on the verge of a mental breakdown, Jay. I’m stronger than you think.”

He turns to face you and takes your right hand in his. “I know you’re strong, _____. Your strength is a part of why I fell in love with you to begin with. I’m just thinking about what Dr. Lee said.”

You sigh as you think back to your joint therapy session with Jay two days ago. You opted to attend the first one alone, you didn’t think you could be completely upfront with your therapist had your husband been there in fear he would be disappointed with himself and blame himself for your actions and emotions. Once you had gotten the initial meeting over with, you scheduled a joint one with him for Thursday. It went better than you anticipated.

Jay takes a seat on the lounge chair beside you and peeks at you, letting out a sigh when he sees your face, “sweetheart, you being nervous is making me nervous.”

“I’m sorry.” You shake your head, “I just know things will be different once the hour is over.”

It breaks his heart more than it scares him that you think it’ll be that way. He squeezes your knee to stop it from bouncing. “Different isn’t always bad, I’ll better know how to care for you. This is what we need my love.”

There’s a knock on the door before it opens. A slender female walks in, wearing a black skirt and a baby pink blouse, and smiles brightly at both of you. “Ah, so this is the infamous Jongseong! A pleasure to finally meet you.”

He stands up to shake her hand and offers a smile, “likewise.”

She smiles once more at you as she sits down on the armchair and taps her finger on the clipboard she brought in. “So, shall we begin?”

You look at Jay and he nods at her, easing back in his seat.

She leans forward and crosses her legs.“How have you two been? The twins?”

“We’re doing okay, better than we were last week.” Jay answers, “the twins are good too. They’re spending the day with my mother.”

Dr. Lee nods her head at him. She turns to you, “You must be excited, I know I would be if I got some alone time away from my children.”

You feel your cheeks warm up, “the quiet home is nice, it’s been a while since I could hear a pin drop.”

She hums before looking down at her notes.“During our last session_____ explained to me feelings of loneliness and isolation, has she explained this in any detail to you Jongseong?”

You didn’t think she’d segway into your postpartum so abruptly; your mouth opens, but you shut it immediately. It’s not your turn to speak.

“She has, very briefly though. It was after we had an argument about her ex, I was upset and I also felt…betrayed. I couldn’t understand why she couldn’t just put him and their relationship to rest. I only really became more empathetic when she explained she might be dealing with a mental disorder.”

“I see. _____ did mention an argument during our last session.” Dr. Lee says as she makes some new notes in your chart before returning her attention to Jay, “I’ll get into her diagnosis in a bit but first, I’d like to know something. _____ explained to me the fight you had in the elevator and everything that followed..”

“It might be difficult for you, Jongseong, but I’d like to ask what you were thinking of from when you walked in on Kai conversing with _____, to confronting her in the elevator, until the night ended.”

“I tried calling her before I left to look for her but she wouldn’t answer and when I saw her holding her phone and talking to Kai, blatantly ignoring my call it just made me feel second place to him again. It didn’t help that she couldn’t be clear about her feelings, all I wanted to do after that was go back and punch the smug look off his face.”

“I see. Why were you so mad at Kai? He wasn’t the one who hurt you, so why take your anger out on him?”

Jay doesn't answer immediately, trying to properly think through his response. “He hurt _____ yet she was still hung up on him. I didn’t think it was fair that he continuously got a second chance with her when he never deserved it to begin with, all I ever wanted was for her to love me as much as she loved him...to open up to me like she did with him.”

“Hasn’t she?”

“No. It feels like I always have to argue with her before she tells me how she truly feels.”

Dr. Lee nods, “Well, what if I told you she has? She might not flat out tell you what she’s thinking like she did with Kai but you can’t expect her to.” She sits up straight and places her chin in the palm of her hand. “The one person she trusted enough to open up to betrayed her trust in multiple ways. It won’t be easy to do it again. While she might not be at the level of completely opening up, she’s doing it in her own way. When she feels as if she’s ready, she comes to you, she takes her time to think her thoughts through so as to not hurt you. There’s no doubt that she needs to work on her communication skills but at the very least, she’s trying.”

You look at Jay to see how he’s receiving the news but his face is blank.

Dr. Lee watches Jay as well, waiting for a beat to pass before she clears her throat, “I officially diagnosed _____ with postpartum depression, also known as PPD. It’s a continuous pattern of mood swings, restlessness and reduced ability to clearly think. People with PPD can go through very intense episodes of emotions, such as anxiety and depression.”

She pauses to let him process the information, seeing his brows furrow ever so slightly.

“Symptoms of PPD,” she continues, “are feelings of loneliness and loss of self. People with PPD will often seek out people or things from their past to prevent this from happening; along with this, because they’re so focused on their past and what feels like is missing they can’t allow themselves to focus on the lives they have now.”

You don’t say anything, even though you feel like you should. But still, you don’t comment on it and nod at her. “This can lead to a lack of bonding with their children. While _____ hasn’t shown much trouble connecting with the twins there’s still a chance it could happen if we don’t properly care for her.”

“Is this treatable?”

“Yes, there are many options such as medication, therapy and even self soothing measures but your wife has elected to not medicate. For _____, this is what we call cognitive behavioral therapy; a type of therapy that tries to identify and change negative thinking and pushes for positive behavioral changes.”

“There’s nothing wrong with wanting to get closure and putting this behind us.”

Jay nods and leans in to kiss your forehead, “okay. If you feel you’re ready then I won’t push.”

Later that evening the two of you sit down to draft your personal statements regarding the current situation before sending them off to Jaemin to revise. The edits are quickly made that night before being sent to you to read. Once receiving the stamp of approval from the two of you both are posted to Weverse and the response is rather surprising. You’re met with sympathy and grace, fans understanding how hard you must have had it these past few days. Engene step up and start trending tags for both you and Jay and you feel relief all over your body.

While Jay wasn’t your first boyfriend, your first kiss nor was he even your first love, he was the only love for you. And that’s the only love that matters, the only one that’ll last and go the distance. It’ll always be him.

#enhypen imagines #jay smut #jay imagines #jongseong x reader #park jongseong #jay x reader #enhypen jongseong #jongseong smut #enha imagines #hueningkai #hueningkai imagines #enhypen jay #jay angst #jay park

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fleurlia · 3 months

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tropes and tulips: a romantic rollercoaster

ʀɪɪᴢᴇ as ʀᴏᴍᴀɴᴛɪᴄ ᴛʀᴏᴘᴇꜱ

pairing. riize x reader genre. fluff, angst author's note. hi guys! i’ve been so excited about this riize series and makes me soo happy to share with u guys, it’s been a while since a posted some of my work. i promise to keep this interactive as i can, i love to hear what u guys think!!! so i guess the resquest are open (riize and nct dream, in the future i hope to write for enhypen too).

RELEASE DATE. february to march. TAGLIST. send an ask/dm/reply to be added.

caught in the choreography of fate: a dance with osaki shotaro | grumpy x sunshine | college student!shotaro x college student!reader

when your best friend's jerk ex-boyfriend abruptly dumped her, all you and your friends could think about was how to get revenge on that shitty dancer. despite weeks of planning your little evil scheme, everything goes wrong, and you are the only one caught in the middle. in that moment, everything passing by you was how your life was going downhill, and your perfect record as the brilliant student you were was ruined. but for some kinda miracle the academy decided they could use you and as a retribution, you ended up as the dance partner with shotaro, the star of the company.

testing the family bond: siblings edition | brother's best friend | college student!eunseok x sungchan younger sister!reader

the most precious thing in the world to you is your family. your older brother, sungchan, has been your best friend since forever, and due to the small age gap, you also share the same interests, friends, and even attend the same college. you would never hide anything from him, and he wouldn't from you. for years, you've upheld your role as a sister and best friend, following the agreement to not get romantically involved with any of his six closest friends, until the day you found yourself entangled in a foolish game with eunseok.

faking it with the heartbreaker | fake dating | college student!sungchan x college student!reader

you always had a thing for jerks; that was clear to you after many letdowns in your love life. trying to escape a never-ending situationship, you feel stuck and tired of heartbreaks until jung sungchan looked into your eyes and suggested playing the part of your fake boyfriend. of course, he was totally benefiting in the process. all you could think is how this could get really wrong really fast, but well, what disappointment could you have when it was all just pretend?

frozen hearts, warming love: the park wonbin effect | the heartthrob + doesn't believe in love (first love) | college student!wonbin x college student! reader

wonbin is popular, even though he's shy and, to those who know him, a bit awkward. hundreds of girls have confessed their feelings to him, only to be politely rejected. rumors and gossip circulate through the hallways, but no one has ever managed to melt the heart of the icy prince, park wonbin. until you come into the picture. famed for being a flirt cupid, you decide to bet that even the icy prince has his ideal match, and come what may, you're determined to find it.

stormy relations; frenemies under one roof | enemies to lovers + the boy next door | student!seunghan x student!reader

you've known seunghan longer than you'd wanted to. since moving to a different neighborhood three years ago, you've had the worst view in town: seunghan's room, your declared enemy for three years or more now. neither of you can even remembers why you dislike each other, but now your rivalry is known even in the school corridors, and everything turns into a competition even if one is not interested. everything changes for you when a storm and a fallen tree force you to start living under the same roof, and for a few fleeting moments, seunghan doesn't seem so bad in your eyes.

love in the lab: 36 quetions, one answer | friends to lovers + classmate to lovers | college student!sohee x college student!reader

after being subjects of a close friend's psychology study, which involved an experiment with "36 questions to fall in love," sohee can't stop thinking about you. you're fun and kind, surrounded by friends and numerous contenders trying to win your heart — how could sohee not fall for you? while this might be the most embarrassing thing to happen to some, for sohee, it was like waking up from a deep sleep. now, he needed to wake up to another reality: the fierce competition to win your heart.

life, love and anton | childhood friends to lovers | anton x reader

you've known anton before even knowing yourself. you grow up together, attended preschool, graduated side by side, you were there for all of his competition and he made sure to never miss one of your presentations – you even shared your first kiss. for both of you and your families, your relationship is more than friendship; you're each other's family. things take a turn when, on your 18th birthday, a rather awkward confession occurs, and then anton realizes: there never has been and never will be any girl after you. you've always been his soulmate.

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fictionismyreality3 · 4 months

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CAN YOU GIVE US MORE OF JASON STALKING?? I SWEAR TO U, IS REALLY HOTTTT AAAAH

I loved your writing btw

Omgomgomg hi babes!!!! You’re my first ask ever!!! You’ll forever have place in my heart 🥲 but really that is so sweet of you, and toTALLY STALKER JASON IS SO HOT HERE YOU GO

A Little bit of Sunshine

Jason Todd x Reader

Tags: stalker!jason todd, innocent!reader

Warnings: stalking, mention of drugs

Notes: I’m actually dying at picturing getting stalked by Jay 😩 like that should not be hot but it is??? If people like this I might make it into a mini series or something 👀

He was going to stop the first night.

At least, that's what he told himself.

Since Jason had come back from the Pit, being alive was something of a nuisance. Whatever weird ass magic they used to bring him back to life had made it harder to control himself in every way. He went on a year-long violent rampage, much to Bruce’s disdain, that left Gotham in shambles.

Only now was he actually putting a good face behind the name of the Red Hood. It’s not like he wanted to hurt people, but when everything was so vivid, it was hard to listen to Bruce’s non-lethal policy. But as much as he hated to admit it, he wanted Bruce to trust him again.

So, when Dick was called out of Bludhaven for some other crisis, Jason volunteered to help with patrol.

It was the third day of what was supposed to be a week-long shift in Bludhaven, and nothing out of the ordinary had happened. Sure he had broken the legs of a few robbers when they tried to run from him, but it was all in good fun.

In fact, Jason was dying for some fun. Bludhaven was somehow even darker and dingier than the rest of Gotham, and it was getting tiring only having drug dealers to play with. The rain was coming down, casting a foggy overcast to the darkening sky, and most of the sane residents had retreated to their homes. Everyone who had ever been to Bludhaven knew that nighttime was when the dangerous criminals liked to do their work.

Which is why Jason was a little astonished that a seemingly random girl was stupid enough to walk home in the dark.

Living in Bludhaven wasn't ideal, but the rent was cheap and that's all that mattered. You had been working at a donation center for the homeless for the last few months, wanting to help out the city in any way you could. It wasn't that you were trying to be a hero or something, you just didn't like seeing other people suffering. It also helped that volunteer work looked killer on a resume. The staff loved you, and quickly entrusted you with the keys, giving you the last shift of the night.

You usually walked home with one of your co-workers, a woman in her 60s named Rose. It wasn't the typical company for someone your age, but her never-ending stories were nice to zone out to after a long day of work. Rose was sick today, which meant you had to walk home alone. Looking out the window, you saw that it was already dark. Definitely not ideal. But, you had made the trip hundreds of times and knew all the shortcuts to get you home quicker.

Jason watched as the girl walked down the dimly-lit streets. He was going to just leave it, and let you learn your lesson the hard way, but then he took a second glance at you.

He thought the Pit bringing him back to life was the closest thing he'd ever get to seeing heaven. But now?

Now he knew he was dead wrong.

A soft face with pretty lips and pretty hair and pretty everything. Jason felt his heart beat inside his chest with a vigour that betrayed the dead man he thought he was. All of the lonely, unclear and dangerous thoughts in his head suddenly vanished. His breaths were heavy and he couldn't tear his eyes away from the pretty little thing walking all alone. He felt like there was blood flowing in his veins again. He felt alive.

If you were walking alone at this time of night you were either innocent or stupid, and the innocence was practically rolling off you in waves. You were far too sweet for this place. His eyes scanned the logo of the bag you were carrying and his heart exploded and regrew in his chest all at once. The kind face you had made sense if you were generous enough to work at one of Bludhaven's seedy donation buildings. His mouth went dry at the idea of anything remotely distressing happening to you.

Fuck it.

He was just gonna make sure you got home safe. That's all it was.

Jumping from rooftop to rooftop, Jason silently followed you as you walked home, watching from above like a twisted guardian angel. He was always on high alert, he was raised to be vigilant, but he found himself paying extra close attention to every single movement he saw out of the corner of his eye. Logic was telling him that if he was going through all this trouble to make sure a random girl was safe, he should just jump down from the roof and walk you home instead of watching like some-

Oh, that was cute.

Jason's gaze followed your hands as you pulled your keys from your bag. The fabric keychain they were attached to was dotted with tiny drawings of the sun. He hadn't even realized that you'd gotten home. Perching on a rooftop, he kept you in his vision while he quickly scanned the area where you lived. It wasn't the best, nothing in Bludhaven was, but at least it wasn't at the south tip of the city.

You had finally gotten home after a long day. Oddly, the walk didn't feel as scary as you expected. Sighing, you took out your keys and unlocked your front door, slipping inside your apartment. After making sure your door was locked, you kicked off your shoes and hung up your jacket, a yawn falling from your lips. You were definitely gonna call it an early night.

The soft clicking of your front door shutting brought Jason's attention back to the present. You obviously got home safe. He should get going. He should get going.

But he stayed rooted on the spot.

The rain fell around him, hitting the concrete rooftop he was frozen on. His helmet suddenly felt claustrophobic and he took it off gasping, the rain soaking his hair. The cold rush of despairing thoughts that he had grown used to flooded back into his brain. His heart grew still in his chest and he felt his smile disappear.

He had smiled?

He hadn't smiled since the pit. He hadn't smiled since he died. You retreated into your apartment and took all the sunshine with you. The sunshine that hadn't been able to reach his skin for years. With a sickening thought, Jason realized that he was about to make a very, very, very bad decision.

Who was he to deny himself happiness? Didn't he deserve to be happy after everything he had been through? He argued with himself as his gaze remained on your front door, trying to will himself to push away the wickedly possessive desire that he felt for you. Jason ran through all the possible outcomes that could come from.. whatever this was, but nothing held a match at the prospect of having you. He had to have you.

Fuck it.

Locking away the part of his mind which screamed at him to stop, he leapt from the rooftop, landing softly on the balls of his feet. Carefully, his head on a swivel for anyone walking by, he took out his phone. His finger hovered over the photo button, his mind telling him that if he did this, there was no going back. He snapped a photo of your apartment.

As he made his way back to the safehouse he was staying in, he could feel you being cemented in his mind. Every raindrop that hit his skin felt like it was washing away everything that he thought was important until only you remained. The image of your precious face became ingrained in his mind. By the time he got back to his safehouse, the only goal he had was to know as much about you as he possibly could.

He was already at his computer, his helmet tossed to the other side of the room. His clothes were still soaked from the rain, but he didn't care. This was more important. You were more important.

Using Bruce's tech, being careful not to leave a trace, he uploaded the photo he had taken of your apartment and began to run a search. Within less than 5 minutes he had everything he would need to keep you for himself. Your school records, social media posts, and more were at his fingertips. He took the liberty of adding himself to your bank account, hacking in so he could be aware of every transaction you made. Soon he would be the one making them for you.

Jason spent the night scrolling through your information. For once he was glad for Bruce's training, as his disciplined mind allowed him to commit everything about you to memory. His eyes burned from lack of sleep, and he was vaguely aware that it was well past 3AM, but he was enraptured reading your search history.

How to change a lightbulb?

Cute.

As soon as he could get a copy of your key made you would never need to change a lightbulb again. Every so often he would come across a photo of you dressed up for some event; a christmas party, a graduation, whatever. When he saw those photos, every doubt that was trying to creep back into his mind was pushed away by his increasingly twisted desire for you.

Jason knew he had gone off the deep end, but if this is what drowning felt like he would gladly let you kill him all over again. When he went to bed that night, he fell asleep knowing you now belonged to him.

And you didn't even know it yet.

#oneshot #jason todd x fem!reader #jason todd x y/n #jason todd x you #jason todd x reader #jason todd fanfiction #stalker!jason todd #jason todd

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juyeonszn · 7 months

Text

DIVE TO YOU

PAIRING lee sangyeon x f!reader

WORD COUNT 2.61k

GENRES fluff ﹒suggestive

WARNINGS 18+ MINORS DNI u already know, roommates to ;) type beat, ummm they’re naked, they are in a bathtub, sangyeon is… wow sangyeon just deserves a warning on his own, he is A Lot, there’s a mention of a voyeuristic moment but it’s nothing crazy, he massages reader, they make out, i tease u all bc i’m evil like that

SUMMARY you’ve never really thought of sangyeon in an explicit way, but now that you’re stuck in this position, it’s going to be difficult for your thinking to go back to normal.

MORE SURPRISE ALLY (@winterchimez) MY BELOVED THIS ONE IS FOR U <<<3 i hope i didn’t kill u </3 this is another request from my 100 followers event! prompts used are: 9, 16, 17 🤞

PERM TAGLIST @winterchimez @maessseongs

You hated your job more than anything in the world. It was mind-numbing. All you did was stare at a computer all day and type type type, responding to emails or drafting up documents for your boss. It was exhausting. To be honest, you were sick of it.

But you needed it, unless you wanted to get kicked out of your apartment for not making your share of the rent. Sure, having a job you disliked wasn’t ideal, but you were surviving and wasn’t that all that mattered?

Besides, you’d probably die if you were forced to move out of your apartment. Your roommate was the only reason you moved in to the damn place despite rent being so fucking expensive.

You remember the day you stumbled upon his ad like it was yesterday, though it had already been exactly one year. You’d just finished your first month at your job and you were growing tired of dealing with your parents. Yeah it was nice that you didn’t have to worry about half of your current expenses while living under their roof, but you knew you needed to ship up and move out eventually. You figured this was the perfect time to do so.

You scoured the internet for apartments, but soon realized that living on your own would be way too much, considering all of the other things you also had to worry about now. As you started filtering through listings that requested a second habitant, you stumbled upon your roommate’s. The rent itself was a little bit over your budget, but the way he worded his ad had you hooked.

Just an hour later you were emailing him and setting up a meeting to discuss important details. You met up at a cute little coffee shop a few days later when you both found some free time. Being the punctual person you were, you arrived earlier than planned, ordering your go to and picking a two seater in the corner by one of the floor-to-ceiling windows.

You had always been the type to psych yourself up before doing anything major. You needed at least half an hour of prep time if you were making any important decisions, because you could not handle things going wrong. Everything in your life had to be carefully and methodically done. You liked to say you were thorough, but everyone else called you a perfectionist. It is what it is.

And because you didn’t know this guy, you had no idea what he looked like and you weren’t aware that he had the same mindset. You glance up from your drink to see the most handsome man you’ve ever laid your eyes on walk into the cafe, ordering something you can’t make out. He looks like something straight from a drama, his hair styled neatly and his outfit put together. Even under his thick coat, you could see how well sculpted he was.

You don’t realize that you’re staring until he’s suddenly walking towards your direction, his coffee in his hands. He furrows his brows and clears his throat. “Hi, I don’t mean to bother you, but do you happen to be Y/N?”

Oh my god. No way. There was no way this hunk of a man was your potential roommate. It was impossible.

When your lips part in shock and you don’t respond for a couple seconds, he blinks at you. Okay, maybe it wasn’t that impossible. You nearly facepalm for already making such a fool of yourself before you’ve even held a proper conversation. You stumble over your words as you gesture to the chair across from you. “Y-Yes! Yes, that’s me. Please, take a seat!”

He smiles politely, setting down his drink and shedding his coat. “It’s nice to meet you, I’m Sangyeon.”

You wipe your hands on your jeans before reaching to shake his hand nervously. If you could hardly handle this simple meeting, how could you handle living with the guy? He might send you into spontaneous combustion by just looking at you.

Sangyeon had the patience of a saint, and you would be eternally grateful for it. After getting to know each other better and growing more comfortable around him, the two of you discussed the roommate situation. You truly lucked out in finding him, seeing as you shared a lot of similar ideals. He even offered to lower your part of the rent as much as he could, explaining that you were by far his favorite candidate for the second room.

Later that same day, you went over and got an apartment tour prior to signing a lease agreement. And then the rest was history.

You sigh as the clock finally hits 6, signaling the end of your very long work day. One thing you disliked about getting off at the time you did was the fact that it was always snowing. It made it hard to navigate your way home, since most people packed around the bus stops like sardines. You hug your coat to yourself to block out the harsh winds, your scarf wrapped up to your nose.

You were tired and cold and all you wanted was to be inside the blanket that was your apartment, soaking in a hot bath with a glass of wine beside you. Sangyeon was supposedly working late today, which meant you’d have some much needed alone time.

The entire bus ride, you find yourself drifting off and then startling awake when you drove over a bump. You don’t remember the last time you were this drained after a work week. It could’ve been because you stayed over time a couple days, but you didn’t think it would affect you that badly.

When you finally arrive at the stop near your apartment, you’re almost in a zombie-like state, trudging through some of the snow that has started to stick. The only thing keeping your eyes open was the obnoxious chattering of your teeth.

It feels like a millennia by the time you’ve reached your front door, hands shaking as you attempt to unlock it. You’re partly surprised you didn’t drop your keys. The moment you step into your home, it’s like a huge weight has been lifted from your shoulders.

From the lingering scent of your peppermint and vanilla candle to the warmth of the building’s heating, you felt like you’d just been cuddled by a teddy bear. You shrug off your coat and hang it on the set of hooks beside the front door, leaving your shoes on the rack just beneath. Your sock clad feet drag you towards the kitchen, where an unopened bottle of wine awaits you.

You’re tempted to just drink straight from the bottle, but you didn’t want to get shitfaced, you just wanted to feel relaxed. Nevertheless, you pour yourself a… hefty… glass and waddle to the bathroom. A mental note was made to thank your coworker for the bath salt and bubble set she got you as a gift, seeing as it was finally being put to good use.

It doesn’t take long for you to peel off your layers of clothing after you’ve turned on the faucet and adjusted the temperature to your preference. You watch with heavy eyelids as the bubbles begin to form along the surface of the water, rising up and filling the tub. You dip your toes in while simultaneously taking a sip of your wine, damn near moaning at how much better you felt.

You press play on one of your playlists and light a candle before finally sinking into the water, succumbing to its serenity. Your eyes start to flutter shut and you don’t even try to fight the sleep that calls your name.

You’re not sure if hours or minutes have passed since you fell asleep, but the creaking of the bathroom door opening stirs you from your slumber. Most people probably would’ve had a bigger reaction, considering someone just walked into the bathroom without checking if it was occupied first. And also because you had assumed you were home alone.

This was one of the various times you wished the earth would just swallow you whole.

Lee Sangyeon stands in the doorway, shoulder resting against the threshold with his arms crossed. His dress shirt from work is unbuttoned all the way to the third from the top, his muscular frame stretching the fabric deliciously. You wondered how he was comfortable, since he wore such tight shirts. Occasionally you truly understood why the term ‘Take A Picture, It’ll Last Longer’ existed.

You were extremely thankful that you added bubbles to your bath, the foam covering up your body where the sun usually doesn’t shine. Sangyeon has an amused glint in his eye and even with the fogginess of your partially awake brain coupled with the few sips of wine you’ve had, you know it’s off brand for him.

“S-Sangyeon, what are you doing in here?” You trip over your words, wrapping your arms around yourself tightly.

“Well, I just got home and I was planning on doing the same thing as you,” he rolls his neck as if to display his own tension from a long day. “But it looks like you’ve beat me to it.”

You blink at him. Why was he still standing there? Staring at you like… that?

“Um… Why haven’t you left?” You swallow, but your mouth is dry.

“Is there some space in that bathtub?”

He asks the question so smoothly, the words rolling off of his tongue like he’s asked to join you in the bath on numerous occasions. You gape at him, your head spinning in circles. Perhaps you were still half asleep and your mind was playing tricks on you. That made the most sense. Perfect, sweet roommate Sangyeon would never ask you a question like that.

“I’m sorry?” Part of you feels stupid, gawking at the male and stumbling over your speech. It’s like you’ve completely malfunctioned, every logical point of your body shutting down for unscheduled maintenance. You had to recalibrate your systems fast.

Sangyeon repeats himself, not skipping a beat as he does so. You do a 180, glancing around the room as if someone else was present. You jab a finger into the only exposed part of your chest and then at the water with scrunched eyebrows.

“Yeah, is there some room in there for me to fit? You know, Y/N,” he shrugs, going for the next button on his shirt. “I have seen you naked before.”

You nearly drown yourself on the spot. Lee Sangyeon has seen you naked? This was news to you. Last you checked, neither of you had ever done anything intimate enough for that. He laughs that attractive laugh of his, his eyes forming crescent moons. You’re enticed to drown yourself a second time.

“Y-You have?” This was probably single-handedly the most embarrassing moment of your life.

“To be fair, it was an accident. I walked past your room while you were changing once but you didn’t have the door closed all the way, and well, I am a man so, I couldn’t help but take a peek.” He scratches the back of his neck, letting out a small chuckle. Okay so God definitely had favorites and you weren’t one of them. Nice to know.

He unbuttons another button, stepping closer to you, closing the distance between you. He crouches next to the tub, finally at eye level with you. Oh, what you would give for a moment of this man’s time. Here he was, handing you just that on a silver platter and you were royally fumbling the bag.

“So is that a yes?”

You really don’t trust your own voice, so you merely nod, biting back the urge to groan when he grins at you, standing upright. It’s like you’re stuck in a trance, watching him clear the rest of the buttons of his shirt like light work. The sight of his abdomen on full display has you releasing a tiny squeak. Then comes the unbuckling of his belt and that alone is a mental image you don’t think you could ever forget. You dip your chin into your shoulder, looking away when he strips the rest of his clothes.

You feel him before you hear him, his leg brushing against the back of your arm as he slips behind you into the tub. He exhales deeply, exactly like you did when you got in. You’re as stiff as a board, not sure what you should do with your roommate naked and sitting behind you, sharing bath water like it was a regular Friday night. You keep your focus on the faucet, too afraid to make any sudden movements.

“Relax, N/N,” he pins his chest to your back, hands coming up to massage your shoulders. “You’re so tense.”

The way he works his thumbs into your skin has shivers running down your spine, your entire being feeling like it’s lit up. You suppress a whimper when he kneads a knot just below your neck, squeezing your eyes shut and biting your lip. Before today, you’ve never really thought of Sangyeon in an explicit way. Sure you thought he was extremely handsome, but that had always been just a surface level notion. You’d never fantasized about a crazy, fan-fiction type moment like this. But now that you’re in it, you don’t think your thinking could ever go back to normal. You could never see him as just your handsome roommate.

You have half the mind to scoot into his lap, but it seems like he’s beat you to it, sliding his hands down to your waist and pulling you towards him. Your eyes widen when you feel him, hard and pressed to your lower back. At that, you finally make a noise; something between a strangled moan and a whine.

Sangyeon brings his lips to your ear, grazing them along the shell of it. “Can you feel how much I want you?”

“Y-Yes,” you gasp. “I can feel you.”

This is insanity. Were you still waking up, conjuring up this entire scenario with your half conscious mind? Maybe some sick and deluded higher power wanted you to realize the possibility of having feelings for Sangyeon, and this was their way of doing it.

But then one of his hands trails to your thigh and he pinches you lightly. That’s how you know this is real, this is actually happening. You crane your neck slightly to glance at him. His eyes are darker than usual, a deep brown swimming with lust that almost looks black. It’s similar to how a predator would stare down its prey and it’s a look you could get used to.

Sangyeon’s gaze flickers down to your lips and you just about lose your last bit of clarity, leaning forward to connect your mouths. It’s kind of messy, kind of rough, but the way your stomach twists into knots and goosebumps litter your arms makes you think that the higher being you were cursing minutes ago was actually doing you a huge favor. You’d have to thank them later.

One of Sangyeon’s hands comes up to cup your cheek, his thumb caressing your cheekbone as he does so. Without parting, you turn around in his lap, straddling him as best you can in your limited space. If you thought you felt him before, you definitely feel him now, his cock pulsing against your aching core. Your need was carnal, primal even. He hisses when you grind down on him, gripping your hips to halt you.

“Don’t start something you can’t finish, sweetheart.”

#the boyz #the boyz x reader #the boyz suggestive #tbz #tbz x reader #tbz suggestive #the boyz sangyeon #tbz sangyeon #lee sangyeon x reader #lee sangyeon suggestive #sangyeon x reader #sangyeon suggestive #juyeonszn #juyeonszn.100🪩

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junhuiste · 14 days

Text

experi-meant to be ⋆ park wonbin

pairing: wonbin x gn reader

tags/warnings: fluff, cursing, college au, laboratory environment, one mention of baking, 1600 words

a/n: i meant to publish this on valentine’s day since i had lab that day but i never finished it lol. there’s some microbio lab procedure jargon so like this is what streaking plates is if you want a visual lmfaoao. this is my first published work in like three years it feels weird haha + i might change my layout/header for fics but for now i’ll keep the same layout i've had for past fics

wonbin believes U are the uracil to his adenine—you should always be paired together.

| seunghan: dude

| seunghan: lowkey i can’t come to lab bc my car won’t fucking start so i’ll have to make it up next week :\ but taehyun and his partner would probably be willing to help you out with calculations and clean up hopefully

Wonbin pants heading up the stairs into the classroom lab, cheeks immediately pink as he’s made a spectacle amongst everyone already sitting and tuned into the TA’s pre-lab lesson. Sighing as he processes Seunghan’s text, Wonbin turns to the drawing of bacterial growth curves on the whiteboard but is soon after preoccupied with the fact that there is no Taehyun on a stool. There’s just your backside entirely in front of him.

Taehyun is one to set up all his materials before the TA even steps foot through the lab door so if he isn’t here now then that means—

“Guess you’re stuck with me for today.”

Wonbin tries to swallow but it gets stuck halfway down his throat and is about to go into a choke type cough frenzy when he surprises himself and softly clears his throat instead. His thoughts are all just stuck there—in the middle of his esophagus, begging for them to travel back up to his brain so he has enough stamina to stick it through the four hour class.

“No hate to him because Taehyunnie’s a tad faster at getting through the steps, so you know, we’re usually out thirty minutes early, but I can promise you I’m better at calculations. And I’m more precise with measurements,” you let out a small giggle before setting your backpack on the floor next to Wonbin’s.

The commotion of pipettes being thrown onto the surface, glass tubes clinking, and sneakers squeaking rushing to obtain their samples is right away drowned out in Wonbin’s ears by the sight of you perched atop the stool a mere few inches away from him. He tries to keep his chest from heaving at bay by taking his notebook out of his backpack and reviewing the method for today’s class. The solution is only short lived though, promptly taking notice of how you gather materials from the drawer while simultaneously reading through your own notebook.

Every Tuesday and Thursday, Wonbin assumes his seat in the third to last row of his Virology lecture, close enough to the door that he can be among the first to leave as soon as “see you guys next time” leaves Professor Choi’s lips. He longs for the day (ideally it would be quite before the last week of classes but realistically that’s the best he has to offer for now) that he musters up just the slightest bit of courage to join you and Taehyun in the second row, where Seunghan also occasionally accompanies you two. It’s only the third week of this semester, but perhaps the sixth course of his over the past three years Wonbin’s seen you in. From Biochemistry to Rhetoric 2, he has never taken place at a desk next to yours.

Wonbin’s always aching to know how you’d answer everything he could ever ask you, be it the attendance quiz question or your weekend plans—what time you usually roll out of bed, whether or not you stroll to the local farmer’s market near campus, if you’re spending Saturday with a special someone. He needs to hear you laugh at Taehyun’s cynicism about college. He needs to hear it up close, not having to strain his ear when he’s fifteen rows behind when you crack up at your friend during the five minute break Professor Choi gives the class.

But Wonbin will take what he can get for now, and if that’s helping you fulfill your wish of completing the lab procedure as quickly as possible, he’ll do it.

“I can do the calculations for us,” you begin, “would you mind getting our mutant strains at the front of the class and streak the Petri dishes?”

Wonbin nods almost too enthusiastically and curses at himself for seeming embarrassingly desperate in front of you. Sure, he’d like to muster up the courage to ask you out, but today he’ll try to take it one step at a time.

When Wonbin returns with new plates to grow your bacteria on and two tubes filled with your bacterial strains, you scoot your chair closer to his to later show the finished calculations. He catches a whiff of your light perfume and almost falls out of his own chair.

As he’s setting up the Bunsen burner for sterilization, you chuckle, “you know the real reason Taehyun’s not here today is because he left town last night to get a head start on the extravagant romantic weekend he has planned with Gaeul.”

“If there’s one way to use our one free unexcused absence, that’ll do it,” Wonbin replies.

“Do you have any plans for Valentine’s Day, Wonbin? I mean if you did I just hope you wouldn’t leave me early like Taehyun did,” your eyes meet his for a brief second before flitting back to your notebook.

Wonbin’s grip on the matchstick to light the burner loosens. He just barely catches himself before the match could fall from his hand onto the lab bench. What he needed to get a grip on was his fucking sanity—he almost set the classroom on fire because his heart instead is aflame for yours.

Taking a breath, Wonbin exhales when the flame turns to blue, finally lighting the Bunsen burner.

“Nope, no plans,” he briefly turns to you. There’s a beat and he considers that asking you back would seem too forward, but he does it anyway.

Upon seeing your grin before you open your mouth, he turns his attention right back to the tubes and plates in front of him.

It’s so over.

For a second Wonbin’s relieved, because he thinks he can actually get through the next two hours without overthinking his micro movements in front of you. Now that it’s over for him, maybe he can actually pay attention to the way the metal loop he’s holding makes contact with the jelly-like agar inside the plastic plate and not disappoint Seunghan with the results. However, it’s not realistic because even still, Wonbin takes note of all your beauty and remains completely bewitched.

“Honestly I wish...I mean Minjeong, Yunjin and I are gonna do a rom-com binge and bake desserts…but you know…not any plans with someone like that…”

Your temporary lab partner tries to hide his smile and nods silently as he continues switching between spreading bacteria on the plate with the metal loop and then sterilizing the loop in the blue flame.

The rest of lab goes smoothly as Wonbin tries to quell the embers within him for the time remaining. There’s forty minutes left but technically to you Wonbin knows time is dashing away and it should feel like there’s what but only ten minutes left to do everything. Your pair was a few steps ahead of the others, just like how it would be when Taehyun accompanied you every week.

Wonbin has been psyching himself up the past two hours to finally ask you out but currently he’s stuck in his head and just can’t seem to get it out. Does he chase you after you’ve stepped foot out of the lab or should he leave you be? Or maybe he can try next week. He’ll keep telling himself that until there’s one day of instruction left and then he won’t see you for three months and then he’ll lament the entire summer to Seunghan that he didn’t say shit.

He can do that…or just rip the bandage off at an agonizing speed.

The last Petri dish that Wonbin holds is being wrapped in parafilm to prevent contamination. He’d been going through the motions of the procedure while simultaneously not paying attention to his surroundings, at his own self’s behest. You’ve already cleaned the entire lab bench and he doesn’t notice until he hears “see you in Virology,” and suddenly you’re slinging your backpack over your shoulder.

It’s now or next week…or never—wait you know that Wonbin’s in your Virology class? What you said is ringing in his ears and it hits him all at once.

Petri dishes in hand and turning around, Wonbin freezes in his tracks.

“Um…”

Your eyebrows furrow.

“Do you want to hang out tomorrow?” his own mouth betrays him and suddenly it’s all coming out much too quickly for his liking.

You��re about to answer but before you can even get a word in, “I-I don’t mean to interfere with your plans with your friends but uh, if you wanted to do something like that I’m down.”

Your lips press into a line and Wonbin is about to pass out from the threatening fluorescent classroom lights.

“Park Wonbin…are you asking me out on a date?” He can practically feel his sweat melting the parafilm tape off and a vision of him dropping the Petri dishes in front of you, cracking open and shattering, exposing E.coli to everyone in the room flashes before him. He blinks once and calms his vice grip on the plates.

“Yes. Yes I am asking you out on a date,” Wonbin looks down at your sneakers, not knowing where else to shift his gaze to.

“Well, I’ll see you tomorrow then,” you smirk, slinging the other strap of your backpack over your other shoulder and saluting.

Park Wonbin swears his heart is on fire and does a backflip off a fifty foot cliff. A curve forming on his lips, he smiles slightly waving with the plates still in his hand, “see ya…”

You halt your forward movement and turn back around, “Wonbin?” he perks up again, “you should sit next to me in lecture on Tuesday.”

#riize imagines #riize scenarios #wonbin scenarios #wonbin x reader #riize fluff #wonbin fluff #wonbin imagines #riize #wonbin

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chasedbyatlantic · 2 months

Text

highway to hell, joel miller

masterlist summary: IN WHICH — ellie drives a car for the first time with you and joel attempting to teach her, but it doesn't go as you had imagined.

warnings: post outbreak!joel, pre jackson!era joel, female!reader, implied relationship, protective joel, secretive-ish joel, ellie being a fucking comedian as per usual, stripping, swearing. lmk if i missed anything!

wordcount: 2.7k

a/n: this is genuinely so funny to me. i can SO see ellie doing all of this HAHA. plz request ideas for fics i am out of them!!!! also if u want me to write for any other characters. remember to like, comment, reblog, and follow for updates! xoxo

—

It was no earlier than eight in the evening. The sun was just below the horizon (it was late autumn), and the breeze had started to pick up. You, Joel, and Ellie had been up since before the sunrise this morning, continuing your journey down to Wyoming. Right now, you were in the outskirts of the Illinois countryside, in some small town that was in a time capsule from decades ago.

Before the outbreak, you had worked with Joel (and his brother Tommy) in their contracting business, as a secretary (well, secretary-in-training). You decided to stick with him during his travels after the apocalypse had commenced, despite his bitching and complaining about you being there. Though, the complaining only happened for a short while, he learned to appreciate you and enjoy your company, you were one of the few people he had cared about in this horrible world.

It had only been a few months ago since you had met Ellie for the first time. You didn't like her at the start, to say the least - she was an 'annoying little shit', like Joel would say. All Ellie did all day was nag and pester both you and Joel, but she, as well as the two of you, learned to interact peacefully with one and other. Now, all three of you were inseparable. You sure as hell didn't mind this, but Joel didn't want Ellie (or you, for that matter) near him when he would get himself in shit. Oh well, you can't have everything you want.

Ellie was talking to the two of you about something she had probably learned from all the books she had read at the Boston QZ. To be honest, Ellie had taught you lots of things. Not any survival things, far from that, but brainy things that you would have probably needed if you actually ever lived a normal adult life - paying the government, how much you should ideally spend on groceries, etc.

You weren't paying attention to the girl beside you, tuning her out completely. You were far too tired to be in any more conversation than you had to be in right now, and you just really couldn't give a shit about the percentage rate of silverback gorillas being born in American zoos in the late nineties compared to the early eighties. As Ellie was talking, you had spotted a nice little home of sorts, one that the three of you could spend the night in.

"Hey," You had interupted the other two who were in small conversation, "we can spend the night there." A nod was sent from you to the direction of the small home. The other two went silent, Joel had sped up a tad bit, now in front of you and leading the way. "Wait out here, lemme check't out." With that, he was off inside.

Ellie turned to you, breaking the silence. "When're you gonna teach me how to drive, princess?" That was the nickname she gave you, princess. According to her, it was because everyone had always treated you like royalty. You thought different, but it was whatever. "How old're ya'? Twelve? Not yet, missy." This had earned a gasp from Ellie, like she had just seen a ghost. "Fourteen, actually! More adult than yo-"

She had gotten interrupted by Joel stepping out of the small home, "It's clear, y'all're safe t'come in." He did his little head motion, signalling you guys to come in. You began to walk, and Ellie was on your heel. You brought your hand around her shoulder, roughing up her hair. "Soon, promise."

When you two had entered the tiny abode, it reeked of old. You weren't sure if it was the contained moisture, or nobody cleaning the place in twenty years, but it smelled old. "Fucking Christ! Someone open a window!" was exclaimed from Ellie as she moved out from your grip, and plugging her nose. You and Joel had eyed one another, before you moved to the two windows (one each) and hoisted them open. An immediate relief was sent through the room, with a nice breeze of wind following suit.

"So much better." Ellie groaned, now moving over to the couch in the middle of the room. The house was not big at all, there were a total of three rooms. The living space, a bedroom, and a bathroom. The bathroom was totally out of commission, so that meant only two rooms. "Ya' can have the bedroom," Joel had said to Ellie, "We'll take the livin' room."

"Sleep with a fucking pillow divider, please. I am not babysitting any kids in the near future." This had earned a stern look from Joel, and a wack from you. "Bed, now." You told her after she yelped from the hit across her shoulder. "Jesus! Let me go piss, and then I'll go!" You tsked as Ellie quickly and efficiently moved out the front door, to go and do whatever she needed to do.

"Un-fucking-believable." You had only managed to get out, before sitting down on the couch. Joel had let out a small sigh as he removed his gun that was slung over his shoulder. "Kid's got'ta mouth." He sat down beside you, arm now draping around your shoulder. "I fucking know! How does she even- even know what that shit means? Swear ta' god, I was her age'n playin' with barbies."

After not replying to this, knowing it was just going to keep setting you off, he began to unbutton his shirt. You had glanced down, taking the hint Joel was giving to you. You had tugged at the hem of your jeans, sliding them off. This wasn't for sex, not tonight. You two had known each other for years, and you trusted each other with your lives, so you were both able to get undressed in front of each other without a caring what the other would think.

After Joel was just in his jeans, and you were just in your shirt and underwear, you two had melted into the couch. The couch was the cleanest part of the entire room, which was a huge plus- though, even if it wasn't, you would still have a great sleep on it shortly. Joel had his arm wrapped around you once again, and you were pulled into his bare chest. He hated PDA, so it was perfect when the two of you were just alone- even though Ellie knew something was up between the two of you.

"Can we take the day off tomorrow?" Your voice wasn't loud, just barely loud enough for him to hear. You ear was pressed against his chest, head rising everytime he inhaled and exhaled. "'M sorry, ya' know we can't." After Joel had said this, an audible exhale was heard through the room. Joel's thumb started to rub up and down your shoulder, his hand staying in place. "Don'tcha worry, baby. Only a bit longer, then we'll get time, 'kay?"

Before you had time to respond, you heard a booming sound coming from a bit away. It was an engine. You shot up, causing Joel's arm to fall off of you. He had grunted as he sat up, his brain running a thousand miles per minute right now. Then, you two both had a moment of realization. "Ellie."

It felt like an eternity for the both of you before you had your clothes back on, when in reality it only took about fifteen seconds. "We shouldn't have fuckin' let her go out there." Joel had stated as he grabbed his gun and quickly made his way to the door. You were on his heel as Ellie was to you earlier, praying nothing had happened to her. If something did, you would never forgive yourself- and Joel sure as hell wouldn't forgive you either, despite it not being any of your fault.

The door had burst open as the two of you emerged from it, eyes scanning everywhere all at once, looking for the small brunette. As you did this, you could see some sort of headlights approaching quickly. You had grabbed Joel's arm and pulled him down with you. By the speed the car was approaching at, they wouldn't see you at all if you were on the ground. Joel had his gun aimed towards the approaching vehicle (the only reason he hadn't taken a shot was because he couldn't get a clear one, due to how fas the car was going).

Before you could even process it, the car was stopped in front of where you and Joel were, and the window had rolled down. A honk or two was set out, very loudly. You still weren't able to process what was happening, neither did Joel. Finally, after a moment or two, you snapped back (harshly) into reality). "Is that-"

"Get in fuckers, we're going on a road trip!" The familiar brunette you two were so scared you had lost was, in fact, sitting in the front seat of this random pickup truck, the biggest fucking grin on her face. You were on your feet just after Joel was on his, he looked like he was about to kill someone. "Get out'ta the fuckin' car, Ellie." He had slung his rifle back over his shoulder once he knew that she wasn't some sort of raider.

"No can do, Joel-ly boy. I already got yours and the princess's bags in the back. Hop in, I need to show you this cool fuckin' shit I found!" You had only turned to look at Joel, his view still at the young girl. He was thinking to himself. First of all, how the fuck did Ellie find the keys for the corresponding car, and how the fuck was she able to drive it without any previous experience or help? He was dumbfounded at the moment.

All you could do was grab Joel's arm and lead him to the car, Ellie was refusing to get out and well- you promised to teach her how to drive. God, he was going to kill you later. "I told her I'd uh- you know, teach her." You had audibly gulped, your eyes not meeting Joel's. He was silent, the only thing heard was some Brittany Spears song Ellie had playing.

Once your eyes had met his for a split second, he gave a 'fine, but we're having a long talk about this later' look to you. You opened the door for him like the nice person you were, and he hesitantly got in. You were so nervous right now, you felt like you had broken Joel's trust by doing this. But hey, if for some reason Ellie is on her own in the future, she needs to know how to drive a car.

You made your way to the other side and got in the passenger seat. Joel was sitting in the middle seat of the second row, his hands resting on the shoulder of the seats in front. Once the door was shut, you most definitely did your seat belt up. You had turned your head to eye Ellie, as she just grinned at you. "First rule, always wear your fuckin' seatbelt."

You could tell her heart fell by this, "Right- my bad." She quickly pulled the piece of material over her chest and into the lock. "Alright, now-" She had reached over you, and to the compartment in front. "I found some killer albums. Ones that our Joel-ly boy would love. I'm playing them so the mood isn't totally fucked."

You shook your head, eyeing Joel through the rearview mirror. He met the gaze, looking absolutely annoyed. Though, he was silent and just watching what the two of you were doing. Ellie had finished fumbling with the tapes, and removed the one that was playing. She put the new one into the radio system, and tossed the recently-played one into the compartment. The play button was hit.

"Okay, uh- where do I start? I guess now we talk about the gears? Basically, you'll take the shift and-" Your heart had dropped as you were suddenly cut off by the engine roaring, and now going about eighty miles an hour. For some fucking reason, Ellie was laughing. You and Joel were sure as hell not laughing, as a matter of a fact, Joel was screaming with you.

Some 'oh my fucking god!'s and some 'stop!'s were heard through the music, that was now blaring through the car's speakers. Taking a fraction of a second to listen into the music, you had figured out it was Highway to Hell by AC/DC, an old rock band that was popular when Joel was growing up. How fucking fitting for these circumstances.

Joel's hand, from the back seat, had found your shoulder as he held you to the back of your seat. He didn't have his seatbelt on, but he didn't care. He had to make sure you wouldn't go fucking flying through the front windshield if Ellie came to a halting stop. "Stop the fuckin' car! Slowly- off the gas! Jesus Christ!" He was screaming from the back.

Sure, adrenaline was an exhilarating feeling every once in a while, but going eighty miles an hour in a car from someone with zero driving experience? Not exhilarating one bit. Though, Ellie would beg to differ. She was draining out the screams and panicked tones coming from both you and Joel, and was just having a great time.

After another minute or two of screaming and pleading for the girl to stop, the song came to an end- and so did her manic driving. "Ellie-" You were panting, like you had just ran a marathon. In reality, you were panting because you had just held your breath from the exact time the engine accelerated, until now. "-Ellie, pull the fucking car over. Please god." You were in no means religious, but right now you felt like you needed to go to church and pray.

Ellie didn't really know how to pull over properly, so she just- swerved off the road and pushed the car's "off" button. Joel's hand had fell from your shoulder, and he brought both to his face. He covered his face by his hands for a moment, and Ellie smiled to herself. She felt accomplished by this, even though she almost fucking killed everyone (including herself).

After a moment of silence, Joel had made a sound. It sounded like he was crying. Both you and Ellie, in unity, had turned to him in the backseat. It was so muffled that you did think Joel was crying. You immediately brought your hand to his knee, your heart still racing from what had just happened.

It was only after you did this that you realized he was in fact not crying, but had bursted out with laughter. Joel fucking Miller, the most serious man on the planet, was laughing after he almost just died. You had removed your hand from his knee and turned back forward, shaking your head and crossing your arms. "This isn't funny, Joel!"

Ellie turned back after you, glancing in your direction. She couldn't help but burst out with laughter too. Not at you, but at everything (it also didn't help that she, along with you two, were exhausted). Your gaze went from forward, to the left of you, to Ellie. You could only shake your head, disappointed.

But, if you were disappointed, why had you started to laugh as well? This situation sure as hell wasn't funny, to you at least. "I hate you guys." You managed to get out between your laughter fits. Even if you were setting a bad example right now, you couldn't help it. Everyone's laugh was so contagious, despite the current situation.

Moments like this, you would remember forever. You would remember this as the time your psycho kid almost killed you while driving for the first time, and all three of you bursting out with laughter afterward. Even though the world had ended, you couldn't help but enjoy the small moments like this, where you almost died (but didn't), just being surrounded by the people you had loved more than anything. You had learned so much from moments like this, like not to let a fucking fourteen your old girl drive a car without proper lessons, or that Joel Miller was in fact not made out of stone, and he was able to laugh alongside the rest of you.

Even though the world you used to know was gone, you were happy that, whenever it came, you would get to spend your last minutes surrounded by the people you loved most. Joel and Ellie.

—

highway to hell, ac/dc

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oleicim · 9 months

Note

i wanna be a hayakawa child too pls can u write gn reader living with aki denji and power (mainly focusing on aki being a dad cuz it's funny to me LMAOO) and if you feel like it can the reader be a bit younger than denji and power maybe 14-15? just some random kid they picked off the streets and who aspires to be a devil hunter like aki

PART OF THE FAMILY

PAIRS: p!denji hayakawa x reader ,, p!power hayakawa x reader ,, & p!aki hayakawa x reader

WARNINGS: mention of starvation and uncleanliness ,, angsty attributes overall. reference to suicide, but not detailed at all-no character death. poor self-esteem (aki)

CIELO'S NOTE: this is so over the place but i hope its still okay!! there is no makima in this okay so we are all happy and living together in #peace because thats what everyone deserves... i seriously need to start proofreading

ONE ASSUMPTION MANY SHARED ON WHAT TYPE OF PERSON AKI HAYAKAWA WAS THAT HE WAS HEARTLESS. he seemed so, with that stoic expression and nonchalance of his in many situations where he should’ve shown distraught. but aki was the direct opposite of everything that word conveyed, all the antonyms of it gathered because aki wasn’t heartless, he was compassionate, just discreetly so.

although when the rumors of aki being heartless were asked to him, he’d say he was. it was only because he truly dreamt of being that disconnected from the world so he could just feel the immense pain and sorrow that continuously flooded his veins every minute of the day just disperse just for a second. but even this plain out rejection of the true caring quality he had; it could never be erased. as much as he agreed to the rumors and attempted to force this indifference people assumed of him, he did a number of selfless actions in the shadows that would always prove that he just couldn’t be that person.

so, even as he tried to still yet again close himself off from being humane, he couldn’t help but feel that familiar quality of caring when he had saw your malnourished body shivering in the alleyway. you were just a kid, younger looking than the idiots he’s grown to love. your eyes gleaming still, and it guffawed him that you still had that light in your eyes.

seeing you also reminded him of himself, when the gun devil massacre occurred and had left him as lonely and shivering as you were now. that’s what ultimately led him to stretch out his hand towards you. he wouldn’t allow anyone suffer the same fate he had been bestowed of, not when he has the choice to prevent that. he took the part as your sort of saving angel, despite his personal belief that he was still more of a corrupted being.

he told you then that you could only stay with him till you could pick yourself up, ideally a week to get some food in you and hydrate as well as bathe. but that week ultimately turned into two weeks, then three to four until it turned into months and to the point where the days are still counting.

you’ve got a drawer of clothes in aki’s dresser now, pair of shoes fitted in-between the space of denji’s and aki’s at the front door. you even have your own home slippers, a different color from the rest of the residents in the hayakawa household.

you were part of the family.

now it wasn’t hard to warm up to power, and in a short time you both were so close she said you will be her right-hand when she becomes president, learning that the role she deemed for you is actually called vice-president from a tired aki during dinner.

she's certainly overwhelming, with her shameless antics and loud boasts, but you don’t mind. it's better than the loneliness the streets gave you.

she uses you as her alibi or brings you in when she gets a scolding from aki so you could defend her, and because aki blatantly has shown that he favors you more than others she always gets off the hook.

besides that, “abuse” which aki calls it, power has her own way of doting on you and showing she does truly care, such as throwing out your vegetables during meals, so you won't endure its “nastiness” (that's what she says.)

she lets you play with meowy, and there are times you two and the kitty fall asleep together on the sofa, which has become your favorite pastime. power is unbelievably warm, and oddly soft to the touch. she crawls and latches onto you like a koala, and cradles you like she’s protecting you from the outside world. she lets you in on pranks and dangerous activities that lead aki to give her another scolding, and a firm warning to you.

denji is different, but not in a bad way. he at first was annoying and rejected you, but that was till he learned why you live with them, and then he started to warm up because you also reminded him of himself. he treats you now like power, doting on you with a faux annoyance at first to the action. he bathes you if you're too tired, and lets you poke and prod him and gives you a goodnight kiss on the forehead before you slip in the sheets of aki’s bed for the night.

he honestly looks after you more than he does for himself, making sure you're fine and well before he thinks about what he needs to do for him. that ends in late nights where he comes back from a mission and is so exhausted and weak that you help him swallow down a meal aki cooked earlier, as he hadn't eaten in many hours but made sure he begged aki to make dinner your favorite meal before he left.

what he does for you makes you choke back a sob at night when you think about it and how truly kind he is at heart.

but neither the softhearted but unhinged siblings of yours could take the place of aki’s as your favorite out of everyone in the unofficial family. aki hayakawa gave you everything, the normalcy of a domestic life that you were sure you wouldn't have been able to gain back out in the dirty alleyways. no one can ever top the amount of gratitude and admiration you have for the stoic man.

there’s also something special about how aki treats you, it's a contrast from how he is perceived. he treats you softly. you at times have to pout and tell him you're not a toddler because of how gentle he is, which he always gives out a breath of a laugh and a ghost of a smile in response.

he buys you anything you see, within certain extents, when he brings you out with him for mundane things like grocery shopping. and even then, any expensive item you like will end up in a couple weeks' time in a gift bag by your side of the bed.

theres also the fact of when you first came to live with them, and when everyone, including yourself, warmed up, he learned how to braid your hair. he wanted to help you out, as your hair had grown out a lot from the amount of time of you were out there. he learned the simple braid and that was your hairstyle till he reluctantly picked up scissors and watched a video on the decided hairstyle you wanted, even buying other products to keep up the maintenance your hair needed.

he was ultimately the father figure you dreamt of on those cold nights on concrete, and you couldn't have asked for anyone better so that's why even with denji’s selfless acts and power’s constant love nagging he still remained your favorite. even with his grumpy and nonchalant attitude, you loved him.

and aki equally loved you, so hearing your new boasts of how you wanted to be just like him made his heart stop and his breathing hitch. it was quite clear that aki didn't have a great self-image of himself, he was a man previously living solely on avenging his family, he was rage and depression bottled up and living on the brink of breaking, until you and the others came along. but that inner turmoil still left its fragments inside of him, and aki didn't ever want you to feel or be the same way as him. he doesn't want you to endure the mornings where he has to remember he has people that truly care for him now, that he has people to live for, to protect, so he won’t make a life altering decision.

he knows your words come from a good heart, aki knows that you see him as your savior and he feels a little better at the thought of being a saint to someone such as you. but he still grimaces internally when you state you’ll be as great as him, he loves you so much that it hurts in good and bad ways when he hears your idolization. he’s not what you think, he tells himself, but you do. you’ve grown to know who he is underneath that tough facade and still continue to want to be like him.

you admire his strength for what he has endured, and want to be like him in that aspect. you want your compassionate quality to be as large as his so you could help people like he helped you. he’s your favorite, through in and out and you want to be everything he is.

this all brought you here, standing in front of the television and blocking the comedic show from your unofficial siblings and father figure. they all stared at you, denji’s brows furrowed with an open jaw that you guess is about to let out an annoyed question to what you're doing, whilst power just stared at you with the same intensity denji had, while aki just bored his attention onto you.

“hey! what are you-”

before he could finish the sentence, you had predicted to note, you looked straight at aki, a newfound determination set on your features as you clenched your fists.

“i wanna be a devil hunter jus’ like you!”

your words reverberated against the walls of the apartment, and you could see the eyes of aki and denji widen in reaction, but to your surprise you could see more shock coming from aki. you had thought about this decision for a while, your admiration blossoming for aki as each day passes and it's become so overwhelming that you couldn't just not take an actual step towards being just like him.

denji smirked, puffing his chest as he let out a sigh. “ah, i knew you’d want to be as good as me!” he exclaimed, and your own brows furrowed, and you drifted your attention from aki towards your brother who took the direction of your statement to himself. “what!? not you, idiot!!!!” you rebutted, which resulted in an obnoxious laugh from power, her body falling to the floor as she held her stomach and kicked her legs, spurting out words of insults to denji as he started to argue with power in frustrated embarrassment.

the bickering got louder as the two started to fight, and you chose to ignore them like always and looked back at the stunned aki. the man sat there still with crossed legs, but his gaze seems clouded as he was lost in thought.

“aki?” you said, moving to sit down on the floor next to him, his glossed over eyes moving with you as he kept his stare on you. the man then blinked, once, twice, before he seemed to snap out of his world.

aki knew you’d eventually start to take steps towards your admiration, but not this soon. it was endearing and scary and oh so overstimulating to think about your decision. but he knew you long enough that the determination of yours could never die out, the proof being the light that still gleamed in your eyes on that day he found you.

“really? are you sure?...” his words are soft but had a firm tone, and his seeming acceptance to your words throw you off a bit. you nod after a few beats of silence between you two, the bickers of your siblings drowning out in the background as you focused on the conversation with aki. “yes. i want to be jus’ like you aki.” you confirmed, and before he can refute that he isn't everything you say he is you speak again. “i wanna be able to be strong enough to protect people i love jus’ like you, to save others so they dont leave behind people who will be on the streets like me.” the explanation that falls off your lips made aki’s bustling mind quiet for seconds, your words being drunk in by him.

then, he nodded, slowly, then reached out, moving your body to rest against his side as your head found place in the crook of his neck and your body unconsciously melts into a cradle position beside him. his left hand stretches to rest on the arm that's tucked in front of your body, and the other is placed on top of your head. it was his last chance to properly shield you from the world before throwing you back in it.

“okay, we’ll start with basics, no devil contracts or actual battles just yet.”

CIELO'S SECRETS !!

aki legally adopted you so your last name is actually hayakawa! your siblings are still waiting to gain their actual hayakawa last name :P

i rewrote this 5 times and i still cant seem to like it >:( but this one was the best version! i liked writing about the siblings tee hee.

#chainsaw man x reader #csm x reader #aki hayakawa x reader #denji x reader #power x reader #chainsaw man fanfic

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mazeinthemiroh · 1 year

Note

hello angel !! <3 first off, never feel insecure about your writing, you do SO WELL!! :)) i was wondering if we could get txt members as ur boyfriend if they're asked to describe their ideal type for an interview, and they try to subtly (or not-so-subtly) describe u ???

txt when asked to describe their ideal type (you!!) in an interview

genre: general, fluff

word count: 0.7k

warnings: none

author's notes: thank you for your encouragement :(( you're very sweet. i hope this is to your liking my lovely. some of the scenarios are a bit different to the others/have different situations. hope that's ok. let me know what you think <3

soobin

soobin looked around at the other members dumbfounded by their reactions.

"what?" soobin's eye grew wider, "what did i do?"

beomgyu and hueningkai were laughing hysterically whilst yeonjun and taehyun had their hands over their mouths in shock. you couldn't make this situation up at all.

on live television, soobin was asked what his ideal type was. and he, of course, unknowingly started to describe you. and he got specific. the hair colour, the face structure, the height... being a sleep-deprived leader came with its downfalls.

and when the pin dropped and he finally realised what he has done, he let out a little 'oh' and his ears went bright red. his secret was out.

yeonjun

"my ideal type?" yeonjun leaned back into the interview sofa leisurely, staring off into the distance, "well let's see..."

"i like a person who can... make me feel happy," yeonjun mused, "someone i can goof around and have fun with. someone i don't need to worry about how i act around them."

"you're being too generic with your descriptions," the interviewer retorted playfully, nudging his side slightly, "be more specific."

yeonjun pursed his lips and lifted a hand to his chin as if to act as if he was contemplating the whole universe.

"well.." yeonjun started off again, matter-of-factly, "if i had to be picky, i would sayyyy... their name needs to be called y/n!"

"ahhh, your partner!" the interviewer exclaimed, "now that's a safe choice."

beomgyu

it was an audience participation interview, where the audience that had come had a chance to ask the members their own questions. a lot of moas had shown up for this event, but of course, you were there as well, in the audience, supporting your boyfriend.

"my question for you guys is," an audience member nearer to the front had the microphone now, "what is your ideal type?"

the members went in turns saying what their ideal type was, but when it was beomgyu's turn his mind went blank. all he can think about was you. and as he made eye contact with you in the audience, he couldn't help but smile.

"my ideal type is someone who makes me feel like a better person when i am with them," he said sweetly, trying not to stare at you for too long while the audience reacted to his answer. you knew he was talking about you, and that's all that mattered.

taehyun

"i don't have an ideal type, really." taehyun shrugged as he played with the microphone in his hands.

"surely everyone does, no?" the interviewer questioned, tilting their head to the side, trying to figure him out.

"well i suppose my ideal type would be... well their eyes have to be (your eye colour), and their hair should be (your hair colour). and they should dress like (your style)..."

"ahh i see what you're doing there sir," they cocked an eyebrow at him as he gave the camera a little wink. everyone knew he was talking about you. "what about before your current partner? before you met them, what was your ideal type?"

"i didn't have one," he said plainly and shrugged. "but when i did meet them, i finally had an ideal type. and only they can fit that ideal."

the audience at the interview made a collective 'aww' sound at his romantic words. this boy was in love for sure.

hueningkai

hueningkai is not very good when it comes to their type of personal questions. and when it was asked, his mind went blank as his members looked at him, awaiting his answer.

"my ideal type..."

hueningkai trailed off and stared at the floor. an image of your face came to mind because that was his life now. just you. his ideal type. his one and only. his everything. the person who stuck with him through thick and thin. the person who he trusted the most in life-

"kai~"

beomgyu waved his hand in front of his friend's face to snap him out of his daze, earning a few laughs from the audience.

"uhh," hueningkai bit his lip, "pass?"

the other members laughed along with the audience now as he smiled sheepishly and scratched the back of his head.

646 notes · View notes

radskull-69 · 4 months

Note

(copy pasting what i said earlier-)

May I request Bob Velseb accidentally adopting child!reader? Like he found them one night and brought them home but accidentally got attached? Don't care if it's headcannons or a scenario!

If not, then that's fine!

at first, I was gonna do a whole ‘he found u in a dumpster thing’ but decided to take a bit more of a darker turn.

he was killing two victims, a couple by the looks of it in their own home. Nothing out of the ordinary.

until he heard the meek voice of you call out down the hall, turning his head he saw a small child strolling out of their room. No doubt waking up thanks to the commotion of their parents dying.

you were no doubt any older then five or six, such a shame to lose your parents at a age.

You thankfully couldn’t make anything out in the darkness other then bob’s glowing cyan eyes as he panted, frozen stock still as you both stared at each other .

bob was standing over the mangled bodies of your parents in his costume, blood coating his already red outfit. He didn’t feel guilty per say, but he didn’t feel hungry anymore. He lost his appetite…

it was when the flashing red and blue lights came from outside he broke out of his staring match with you, and in the mist of the moment he grabbed you with his spare hand and flee’d the scene before the cops could get him.

taking you back to his house definitely wasn’t ideal, but he didn’t have anywhere else to put you. He was sitting on the couch with his head in his hands while you ran around the living room and looking at all the bones he had laying around.

he was already regretting this, he should just eat you now. Though, as he peeked through his fingers and saw you playing with a rusty chainsaw he owned. He felt annoyed, but didn’t wanna kill you. Yet.

but other time the distant hunger to eat you faded without him realising it, just thinking that when you got more fed and fatter he’d eat ya. But it never came.

it was a bother for him to take care of you, fighting with himself if he should kill you the whole time. He definitely doesn’t know shit about kids and got you a dog bed at one stage, but after accidentally mentioning you while at work to a customer they gave him some tips. Thinking he was finally married and had a kid or smth

he doesn’t take you on his… hunts, but does feed you the meat he comes back with. He doesn’t tell you where he gets it until a while later when you catch him dragging in a body.

doesn’t take you to school or out much, since your considered missing. Begrudgingly let’s you sleep in his bed with him but after a while became content with it, would let you watch as he butchered the meat and gave you tips about knives.

when your a bit older, maybe around ten. He takes you on his hunts with him on Halloween, the first time you wore a ghost costume, a simple sheet. But that didn’t last long since it made killing hard.

you became desensitised to all the gore and killing since it’s what you were around so much for so long, not realising how wrong it is. Gives you pats on the head when you manage to cut someone in the ankles when they try to run.

when you got your own wanted poster he was so proud! Definitely hangs it up on the fridge.