I'm about ten years too late but going absolutly feral about the fact that The Day of the Doctor happens between The Waters of Mars and The End of Time for Ten. Literally right after his whole Time Lord Victorious thing. He's in the middle of his mental breakdown.

And I knew that. Of course I did. But I've never watched The Day of the Doctor right after finishing the RTD era. I've just seen him at his worst. And this takes place right there?? Of course they can't really get into this in the episode. This is the 50th anniversary special and he's there for fan service and to be fun. Not the time and place to get back into some character development for Ten that was finished four years ago.

But just to have that in the back of my head! He's at an all time low in his life and then a future version shows up that seems to have moved on and be happy about forgetting all about the Time War. And the very man he was when he pressed the trigger, when he made the choice to loose it all, is standing right next to him. When he has just lost everything again although be it in a very different way!

And then! And then he decides to stand next to that past him! He puts his hand above his on the nice big red button. It's the same decision he's regretted all that time and now he is doing it again! How awful must that have felt?!

I know the whole point of the special is then that he saves Gallifrey and that is amazing and fantastic and he's forgetting about all of this anyway (except marrying Queen Elizabeth, that's still there). But part of me can't help but think maybe something of that whole experience stuck. Maybe some unconscious part of him remembered that future self. And he wasn't ready yet to move on like him. And maybe that's one of the reasons why he fought so hard against regenerating. Maybe that's why it was so hard for him to let go.