#we were watching that ''welcome to raccoon city'' movie and it made very grumpy
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Laios wouldn't judge me or make me feel bad for being excited about things I enjoy.
#victor beeps#sometimes i feel guilty for being happy#i hate feeling like too much all the time#i always feel too weird for my best friend. i could tell i was annoying her tonight but switching topics so much#and when i got in i was infodumpping to my mom about resident evil and she just waved me off#we were watching that ''welcome to raccoon city'' movie and it made very grumpy#NOT the topic for today but i do NOT like that movie#just. i wouldn't get rid of my autism for anything it's a part of me and makes me *Me*#but it is still a disability and makes a lot of things hard for me and makes me feel Not So Great sometimes#i love my best friend and gc friends so much but i still feel like i can't be 100% myself around them#but laios would finally be that person!#he'd *get* me. we'd just get each other so well#he wouldn't get annoyed when i spoke really fast and bounced around on topics#he wouldn't wave me off or just want me to shut up#i think i'd finally feel truly loved and accepted and wanted#i didn't expect laios to remind me so much of myself!#to everyone else he's weird and off-putting and annoying#and i am too#but to each other we're so wonderful and perfect#we could be in love with each other in peace without ever worrying that we're too much for the other
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