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#water 7 ofc
bugslap · 2 years
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Mister Franky, ex train engineer turned farrier and horse breeder. unfortunately he names both his trains and his horses after the Battle Frankies line…you kind of have to figure out which is which
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beaulesbian · 5 months
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✨ Happy Birthday Roronoa Zoro ⚔️(11.11)
"Until the day I defeat him and become a master swordsman, I'll never be defeated! Got any problem with that, King of the Pirates?!"
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murphmurphthejerk · 6 days
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Any day we get more Sanji & Robin content is a good day. I wish they had more moments together because their friendship is so special to me <3
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I mean look at them *crying throwing up*
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She was totally going to let him hug her before Nami & Chopper intercepted 💀
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everyroronoazoro · 2 years
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calling out attack names simultaneously with your captain is a very straight thing to do btw.
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cleo-serotonin · 10 months
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you don’t understand. i would commit every heinous crime known to man for an original season one script
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frecklydork · 4 months
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Hi frecklydork!! I just wanted to let you know I was thinking about you- I just got out of a convo w/ a therapist where I realized I was in a really bad relationship and she mentioned I was displaying PTSD like symptoms. I just wanted you to know that theres someone out there who's super super super DUPER proud of you and all the work you've put into managing your PTSD- Feeling constant overwhelming anxiety helped me understand a little of what you must be going through, I can't imagine how stressful your day to day life is and I'm feeling overwhelmed rn! I hope you can take some comfort in this
Goodnight! Or Good day, or good morning whenever you get this!
Hi sweetheart. I'm so sorry to hear that you have gone through a relationship so devastating that it left this much of an impact on you. My heart goes out to you, it's not fun, to say the least, it is a really horrible time and it's especially difficult (in my opinion) when it's repetitive actions from someone you trusted... it's like an extra layer of betrayal on top of everything else. I'm so sorry. I know how badly that hurts.
My response is kind of long so I'm gonna put it under a readmore for ya:
I am so touched that you thought of me, and even more touched that you took the time out of your day to tell me that you thought of me. I hope you don't mind it took me a few days to finally crack open my inbox. I reread this a few times because it really warmed my heart. Thank you for being proud of me. I'm so proud of you, too. I'm so happy you've (I'm assuming, hoping, praying) gotten out of the relationship, or in the very least I'm reassured that you've realized how unhealthy the relationship was for you and you can take the steps to overcome and heal from it now. It's SO HARD getting out of relationships, but nobody else can do it for you, it's always you who has to take those steps, and I'm so proud of you for pushing yourself to take those steps!!!! I know it isn't easy!!!!! I think one of the loneliest feelings in the world is knowing that you're in an unhealthy friendship/relationship with someone and you can literally feel this person draining your energy and making you feel hopeless and worthless and numb. I have never felt more empty than when I was trapped in an emotionally abusive relationship/friendship. It's awful. Getting out of that kind of situation is so difficult, so I am so damn proud of you for recognizing that you deserve better!!! Because you do!!! You deserve the whole world and I'm sorry somebody didn't give you the respect you deserved. It's not your fault. Nothing you went through is your fault at all, and I'll say that as many times as you want to hear it.
I completely hear you on the stress side of things -- thank you for empathizing with me. My God, isn't it the fucking worst? The constant stress?? I PROMISE YOU IT GETS BETTER, I PROMISE I PROMISE I PROMISE!!!!!!!!!! I am finally at a point where my anxiety is not killing me 24/7. It took a hot fuckin minute to get here, but I am at a point now where my anxiety will only eat at me for a chunk of my day instead of my whole day. Getting into the Barbie movie literally saved my life. But, like... it's literally a stress disorder, an anxiety disorder. That feeling of it literally EATING at you every single second that you're awake, and even giving you nightmares when you're asleep -- jesus!!! it's so much!!! it's!!! A LOT and it's intense and it's like you never get any peace. BUT I PROMISE IT GETS BETTER!!!!! 😭😭💙💙💙 IT GETS BETTER ANON I SWEAR TO YOU. I AM HOLDING YOUR HAND THROUGH THIS WHOLE THING!!!!!
One day you will wake up and the person who traumatized you, the events that traumatized you, will NOT be the very first thing popping into your head. One day you'll be able to sit down and eat a sandwich and think to yourself "oh I just went 20 whole seconds without thinking about it". One day you'll be tying your shoe and thinking "oh I think i just went five whole minutes without thinking about it!" slowly, gradually, you will have healed so much, you will look back and think "oh. I'm... so much better than I was."
I actually had this revelation a few weeks ago, I sat down making comics, and then I thought to myself... "...oh... I don't think I thought about my abuser... at all... when a trigger was right in front of my face... for a solid two minutes." I saw a gifset where Margot Robbie was wearing an article of clothing that normally triggers me into a panic attack, but I just kept looking at Margot and thinking "hehehe that's my Barbie!!! <3" and then i realized the trigger was right in front of my face but I was so focused on being gay asf I didn't even realize the trigger was there. And then when I noticed it, my body was like "oh. time to panic" but I managed to push away those feelings and say "nope. nope. that's Barbie. and Barbie is safe. and everything is ok!!!" And two minutes of handling a certain trigger may not seem like a long time, at first... but when you're constantly overwhelmed every single second of every single day... two minutes looks like a blessing. and one day you won't even have to count the minutes anymore. you'll just exist and the misery will only be momentary.
But aside from triggers, now, just in general, I am at a point where I can go hours without remembering my abuser or the events that gave me literally DOZENS of triggers in the first place. Flashbacks are rare, when they used to be constant. I'm not as jittery as I used to be, I'm not as... uh, feeling like I'm going out of my mind, I don't know how else to phrase it, but the anxiety that ptsd gives you literally makes you feel like you're losing your sense of self, and I promise you that feeling goes away with time. I promise you it gets better. I didn't have a support system during my time of need, so my healing process is taking much longer than it would have, so I am hopeful that your healing process is actually going much speedier than mine, even if our circumstances may not be exactly the same ofc but just hearing that you have a therapist helping you out with this is absolutely wonderful. Therapy is so important, paired with self care.
I'm so proud of you anon. I'm so sorry you're going through this and ahhh sorry I'm scatterbrained, it's been a long day and my brain cells are on fire, but!!! I AM SO PROUD OF YOU and I LOVE YOU and IT'S GONNA BE OKAY!!!! IT'S GONNA GET BETTER!!!!!! That feeling of constant anxiety 24/7 is an absolute bitch, but it gets better!!! It gets better!!!! I'll say it a million times, it gets better!!!! And I'm here for you the whole way okay? Please feel free to message me anytime. Ilusm I'm sending you so many hugs and I will be keeping you in my thoughts. 💙💙💙💙💙💙💙💙💙💙💙💙💙
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cuntstable · 4 months
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kms btw, we submitted a small benefit request bc we had to give so much money this month to our water bill and so we are like. broke until december 1st. and the social welfare institution is IN THEORY supposted to give you like. scraps so you dont die bc you cant afford food i guess but ummmmmmmm whoever in the institution failed to include the fucking water bill that was the whole reason we are begging for money into their calculations so our request was denied. i just have to lol…
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nuclearenergy · 1 year
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Sober: rlly awkward and nervous
4-5 drinks: drunk, sociable
>6 drinks: realm of sloppy drunk, blackout area, getting annoying
>8 drinks: cat mode. Socializing abilities in rapid downward spiral
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cyboaronline · 3 months
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i think im the only person in the world who is allergic to the generic fitbit silicone. or it at least irritates the hell out of my skin.
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me: is writing a scene where Steve and Eddie go out and have lunch together at a little restaurant overlooking Lovers Lake and decide to splash out on dessert
me: it would be hilarious if they got pineapple upside-down cake but nah I'm going to look up cakes that were popular in the 1980s, and perhaps some from the 1970s because Hawkins restaurant menus were probably a bit out of touch
me: omfg Watergate Cake
#pineapple upside-down cake is a classic ofc#but I couldn't resist the water gate reference#(for... a scene that I've set in 1985 well before the water gate in Lovers Lake was opened)#also there's something about a cake made with box cake mix pistachio pudding mix a can of 7-Up and Cool Whip w/more pistachio pudding#that just feels appropriate for Eddie#you cannot even make such a cake in New Zealand#it is impossibly exotic to me#yes we have 7-Up and yes we have boxed cake mixes#but COOL WHIP? no#and PISTACHIO PUDDING MIX? no#honestly baffled by what the Americans call 'white cake' and 'yellow cake'#like what FLAVOURS are those? are they vanilla? are they buttery or lemony? or are they just SWEET#so many 'easy' American cake recipes are inaccessible to me#because they call for pre-made ingredients like 'whipped topping' and various pudding/jelly/cake mixtures that just aren't sold here#I make 'key lime pie' with whatever limes are available and a digestive biscuit crust#I sincerely do not care that it is not quite like an authentic key lime pie because you know what#it's nice#and as long as it's nice that's what matters#I recently ordered a big fuck-off box of their 'kosher salt'#just to try to figure out by EXAMINATION what kind of salt that is naturally sold here it most closely corresponds to#American food recipes (not necessarily baking recipes) are just fucking obsessed with kosher salt#IT'S NOT A THING HERE#we have table salt and coarse salt that you put in a grinder and flaky sea salt#THOSE ARE THE SALTS#I'm not trying to be a jerk about this so I hope it doesn't sound that way#it's just one of those things you run up against again and again if you like ‚ you know ‚ American STUFF#that they use terms in their recipes and instructions for STUFF that is absolutely bog-standard in their supermarkets#and totally opaque if you live elsewhere#we only just got one Costco in this country okay people
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svrry · 9 months
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i hate how self care is marketed on tiktok and such as going on a hot girl walk but only if you get ur 7$ coffee and listen to ur tunes with those apple headphones like
not everything has to be giving rich girl aesthetic man i hate seeing all of these clean girl trends n shit. u become a clean girl when u take a shower lmao fuck off idc about what the next trend in nails is (blueberry milk???? did y’all lose ur fucking minds???)
this might sound very confusing to someone who doesn’t spend a lot of time on tiktok lmao
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harshwhimsy · 1 year
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literally the moment we drove over into az my allergies came back full force i love being allergic to everything in the air in this state year round
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jctaro · 2 years
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also thriller bark arc best arc yesyes
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bejeweledblondie · 6 months
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Simon “Ghost” Riley Headcannons
A/N: these are loosely inspired from real life experiences I’ve had living on a military base, these men have a on & off switch it’s crazy
Simon “Ghost” Riley x F! Reader
Warnings: NSFW
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• Simon first saw you while he was in the States for a training exercise, he was out at one of the local bars with some of the other soldiers he was with
• Soap had actually asked for your number first & since he was so intoxicated you turned him down
• Simon apologized for Soap & that’s how you met
• he did have a heart attack when he found out there was a bit of a age gap between you two but quickly got over it when he realized how mature you were
• it was a long distance relationship at first (from personal experience it sucks in the beginning)
• there were times when he couldn’t talk due to the risk of potentially exposing his teams location so you had to write letters every now & then
• you cried constantly whenever you saw some horrific news in the paper about what was going on overseas, the anxiety was awful
• but when he returned the reunions were euphoric
• you have a bottle of his cologne & aftershave so you can always feel close to him
• and you’d spray your perfume on the letters you sent so he couldn’t always smell the paper when he was missing you
• it took him sometime to open up to you about what had happened to him in his past, & your respected that
• when he first met your family, he was shocked by all the support he had received from them
• he asked your parents to marry you the first time he met them & showed them the ring too (ofc they said yes)
• he proposed to you in private after a nice dinner, he got choked up during the proposal
• your dad specifically was elated, he got to brag at how bad ass his son in law is
• your mom if she’s a teacher, had her entire class send cards, candy, anything they’d need in care packages Soap nearly cried when he opened the sweetest letter from a little girl (this actually happened irl my mom’s class did this & one guy got really choked up)
• Simon always would be your fiercest protector
• since he’s like an freakin tree he will guide your head with his bear paw of a hand in crowds
•he CANNOT sit with his back facing the door it stresses him out
•this man is strapped 24/7 whether that be a knife, bear spray etc. he’s ready
•he has a trauma kit in his car because “you never know”
•Simon is 1000% one of those apocalypse preppers you have freeze dried food, medicine, water, etc. he’s always on edge
• he sleeps with a damn rifle next to y’all’s bed
• you have a whole security system too
• your guy’s apartment is impeccable like you could eat off of the floor
• hell your guy’s bed has damn hospital corners
• Simon adopted a cat so you don’t feel as lonely when he’s deployed
• He’s your chonky boy & you do send plenty of photos to Simon when he’s deployed
• Gaz & Soap tease him about him living his “cat dad” life
• you start trying for a baby two years into your marriage
• Simon does fall victim to the “curse of the infantry” (which is not a negative thing btw it’s a running joke that infantry soldiers have all daughters) he makes girls
• he was deployed during your pregnancy & was worried sick he nearly missed the birth of your daughter
• that little girl is the most well protected baby in the whole world, the Task Force gifted him not just baby stuff but damn security for the nursery
• He watches your baby from his phone in the nursery on deployment, he was silently crying once when he was watching you sing a lullaby to your baby girl
•Price had to comfort him father to father
•In reality Simon has a very hard cold exterior at work for the sake of keeping his mental health for the profession he’s in but deep down he’s always held a soft spot & your relationship just brings it out
✨NSFW ✨
• there is a big size difference between you two & it drives him insane
• the first time y’all had together he didn’t want to break you in half
• when he returns from deployment y’all go at it like rabbits for multiple rounds, your poor pussy was so sore afterwards
• has a massive corruption & daddy kink
• he’s an ass man I don’t make the rules here so any position where your ass if the focal point is his favorite
• y’all have made so many sex tapes for him when he’s deployed, he has a whole folder on his phone & jerks off to them in the bathroom or the porta potty (it’s a canon event, trust me) to them
• he lets your cockwarm him constantly when you’re on the couch, when he’s working, hell y’all had even fallen asleep like that
• I know people say he has a Prince Albert piercing but alas per army regulation that is safety risk I think it’s more likely he’d use a cock ring on you
• during a military ball you two snuck off & fucked in a supply closet
• he couldn’t wait to get back to the hotel room after seeing you in your gown, it was red his favorite color
• and he just looked so fucking good in his dress uniform, that was the night you totally conceived your baby girl
• he groans into your ear when he cums & he’ll use his body to just eclipse yours
• “one more baby girl” & “c’mon pretty girl use your words tell me what you want”
• is a sucker for babydoll lingerie it brings your innocence & triggers his corruption kink
• moral of the story Simon Riley fucks
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harmoonix · 4 months
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🔥The Bad Bitch🔥
✮(Astrology Observations)✮
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✮-> Mars in Earth Degrees (2°, 6°, 10°, 14°, 18°, 22°, 26°), gosh their vibes and their attitude is so savage and so striking like they give this boss bitch walking mode
✮-> Mars aspecting Sun or Saturn can get male attention really fast, like they be pulling males looking at them out of nowhere
✮-> Sagittarius Moon/Moon in the 9th house natives have that wild fierce appearance of course, I swear to Nicki Minaj they be the wildest people in the crowd and even at the first sight you met them
✮-> Pluto in the 1st/8th/10th/11th house. Gosh how these natives always attract envy everywhere they go?? Siri play Obsessed by Mariah Carey literally...And even people being mean with you for like no reason. Girl pop off
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✮-> Juno aspecting Mars are that seductive. There are not enough words to describe how seductive these natives can be
✮-> Taurus Mars/Mars in the 2nd house be really having that gorgeous body, and girl go get that cashhhh let it flowwwww
✮-> Mercury aspecting Pluto in your chart makes your voice so deep and so seductive, is also very hard to not fall for your voice
✮-> I swear to Nicki again girl if you have Pluto in the 7th house and you keep attracting obsessive people in your life it's because you have that energy in your life, though relationships can transform you deeply
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✮-> It's good to know that all Liliths (h12) or (h13) give bad bitch vibes based on the element they are in (+ Lilith asteroid 1181) = All your combos of elements
Lilith in earth element = Boss Bitch
Lilith in fire element= Destructive Bitch
Lilith in Water element = Sensual Bitch
Lilith in Air element = Mesmerizing Bitch
✮-> Asteroid Sirene [1009] conjunct/trine/sextile/parallel/ Saturn, girl you really be attracting those dominant people in your life, like if you are looking for serious relationship is really great
✮-> Asteroid Sirene [1009] in the 7th house gonna make you to attract mischievous partners, partners who can pretend something they are not
✮-> Lilith (h13) in 8°. 20° degrees girl you should embrace yourself way more, take care of you and of your energy and of your magnetism too
✮-> Midheaven at 1°, 13°, 25° degrees or Midheaven in Aries , you make sure people know you are that BISH, PURRR don't let people disrespect you and show them who's the boss
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✮-> Midheaven at 10°, 22° degrees or Midheaven in Capricorn is giving "I'm a bitch, I'm a boss imma shine like gloss" these Capricorn Degrees babe so ofc they are bosses
✮-> Midheaven in 9°, 21° degrees or Midheaven in Sagittarius are "wild at heart with a lust for life" that's how my friend describes them and I agree because honestly Jupiter is supporting them so much, go queennnn
✮-> Midheaven in 2°, 7°, 14°, 19°, 26° degrees or Midheaven in Libra/Taurus, you know you are the IT because of your beauty, the people approach you as charming and sensual
✮-> Don't forget where you have Scorpio/Aquarius/Pisces in your chart, because these signs are ruled by 2 planets and they will both influence the house and planets you have in these signs
✮-> Venus at 29° degrees, we are all together in this cus' these are the ender degrees, you'll have to end something in your love topics in this life, these degrees also give you influence
✮-> Capricorn Mars and Mars in the 10th house can't hide from their sensuality, Mars is like a carefree here and doesn't like to hide it
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✮-> Mars in Sagittarius, Leo, Aries bring the fire in your life literally, they're hot and they know that, honestly Mars gets crazy everytime it enters in a fire sign
✮-> Asteroid Salome [562] in Scorpio/8th house knows how to enchant people, they have an unique magnetism that just pulls people and their aura is so sexual, they can aslo have a big sex appeal
✮-> Salome [562] in Capricorn/10th house they're very dominant in everything, very dark feminine vibes and very sassy/sometimes they tend to be a bit mean with people/ they can appear as being hot or sexy in public or by others
✮-> Salome in Libra/Salome in the 7th house can have a very beautiful body and their beauty itself is aswell, they also appear as being charming with people, seductive too
✮-> Sagittarius Venus/Venus in the 9th house, guys just search Venus in Sag women you'll see 90% of them having a very beautiful body/(hips mostly), Sagittarius rules over hips and Venus will make that prominent in your body (Ice Spice and Nicki Minaj both have it in Sag and they are no joke)
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✮-> Venus in Aquarius/11th house or in Aquarius Degrees 11°, 23°, something is so unique/outstanding about these natives, that type of person who stays out of the crowd yet the one who gets the most attention vibes
✮-> Venus in Aries/Venus in the 1st house or in Aries Degrees 1°, 13° 25° their energy though, it's very fierce and they will be the most confident when it comes to their beauty
✮-> Saturn conjunction/square/opposite/parallel Lilith (h12) = Bad girls, this is their world and we just live in it, they're aura gives "I'm the authority here" if you ever read Lilith's Myth and how she became she first woman you'll realize how much Lilith - Saturn aspects have in common with the myth
✮-> Something I will always always and always admire about Capricorn/Aquarius placements is that they have this Saturn protective side, Saturn is their teacher and a father figure in the same time and be sure it can revenge for them aswell (especially in Sun/Moon/Rising because they have it more prominent)
✮-> Lilith in the 1st house/Lilith in Aries/Lilith in Aries Degrees 1°, 13°, 25°, these natives have the vibe of Goddess Eris from Greek Mythology if you don't know her check her out she's iconic. They have this chaos in them but some power too
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✮-> Eros Asteroid (433) in elements can indicate the love style you want/like:
Eros in Fire element loves physical touch
Eros in Water element loves emotional bounding/ or true love
Eros in Air element loves communication in love/talking/opening out
Eros in Earth element loves words of affirmation and quality time
✮-> What's cool about your Midheaven is that it can change its place it doesn't always have to be in your 10th house
Some natives have their MC in their 9th house
Some in the 10th house (just like the basic one)
And some with the MC in the 11th house
You can see your Midheaven by sign it's repsented by (MC) and look in the house it's in.
✮-> Sun in Taurus Degrees/Sun in the 2nd house (2°, 14°, 26°), are giving so much feminine vibes, in looks, personality, they way they act in everything and you can recognize it so easily (at least me)
✮-> Sun/Moon in the 8th house really give that "Im here to experience and to evolve not to take your bullshit" like you don't have to care about others opinion and you focus on yourself, get that crown queens and kings
✮-> Moon in the 10th house (Moon at 10°, 22°) can have it though when it comes to their emotions and feelings, sometimes they can suffer and keep it inside for a long time and they're so strong emotionally!
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🔥 I really hope my posts help you to understand your birth chart better and to be proud of your placements even if they are not always all the placements, I have a lot of posts you can read about so everyone is included 🔥
🔥 H a r m o o n i x 🔥
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thot4ellie · 25 days
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oh sweetheart pt 3
pairing: boxer!ellie x f! jesses sister!reader
word count: 5.4k!!! longest part yet yay
rating: 18+ (smut will be coming in later parts)
warnings: dealer! boxer!ellie, weed, alcohol, boxing, kissing, joel is dead in this, talk of abusive relationship, smoking, they’re drunk but eveything is consensual ofc! lmk if im missing anything
summary: you and ellie share a moment and both of you admit it :)
author notes: hi everyone thank you for all the love on this series <<<333 this is a good one! not all the way edited yet but i wanted to post cause i finished it 20 minutes ago! sorry for the wait but i think maybe some smut in the near future ;) requests are open and id love any feedback. thank you for 200 followers and over almost 2000 likes!! this is unbelievable and im so grateful! pls let me know if u want to be added to the taglist!!!
part 3 | part 4
series masterlist | main masterlist
from the river to the sea, palestine will be free 🇵🇸
READ: this account stands with palestine, and so— i require everyone who interacts to educate themselves, and support/donate. READ THESE; 1 and 2, HELP HERE, BOYCOTT. silence is complicity, do not scroll past this.
DO NOT BUY THE REMASTER, TLOU2, TLOU1, OR ANY GAME FROM NAUGHTY DOG! neil druckmann (the creator) is a zionist. PLEASE READ THIS. AND REBLOG THIS.
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finally friday is here, it feels like you’ve been counting the minutes until you see her again. you woke up around eleven am and put water in the kettle to make yourself some tea as you went to the bathroom to get your morning routine done, paramore playing over your speaker in the bathroom. your routine is something you’ve started to build since you moved to try and keep your anxiety at bay, not all the time it works but its a good way to get your day started. you started with washing your face, brushing your teeth, then brushing the bedhead out of the mess you call hair.
a couple minutes later, you hear the kettle hiss and you make your way back to the kitchen and turn off the stove. you picked your favorite mug out of your cabinet and make your tea. leaving the kitchen, you went back to sit on the couch and think about a million different outcomes that would possibly happen tonight when you see her. you wonder if you’re reading too much into the way she talked to you, was she even flirting with you at all? or just being nice? did she just feel bad about seeing what happened outside her gym?
your phone buzzed in the mist of your thoughts on your and you read a text from dina telling you they’re leaving for the gym around 7 and if you wanted a ride. before responding you pulled up the weather app on your phone and decided you could walk there, its a warm summer day out again and by the time the sun fell, it would be cool enough to walk and it was only about 15 minutes from your house, that and leaving open the possibility that she would want to drive you home again.
you texted her back saying that you would just meet them there. you looked at the time seeing its about eleven thirty so you still have a while until you have to leave. you decided you were gonna be productive today. you did laundry and washed your sheets, did the dishes, vacuumed, cleaned the bathroom and made a sandwich for lunch even thought by now it was 4 o clock. as you were walking around your apartment, you made a mental note to try and find some nice thrift stores around to help you decorate your place. you made your way to your bathroom to shower for tonight.
you love taking long showers, its your guilty pleasure. thanking god that your landlord pays your water bill as you dried off from the shower, put on your strawberry lotion, a big black t-shirt and fuzzy socks to hang around in while you did your hair and minimal makeup. you couldn’t stop thinking about seeing her tonight. new girl was playing on the tv in your room as you finished the final touches on your face. doing light everything since its hot but still wanting to look nice for the occasion: finally seeing her again.
four episodes later and its 6 o clock so you change into a pair of black levi shorts and a green top. your hair and makeup still looked good from earlier so nothing to touch up but you still triple checked yourself. you wish you could have smoked today to help beat the nerves but you wouldn’t have anything until tonight, smiling to yourself thinking of you and her on the phone both laughing when you asked if she was bribing you. you slipped on your converse, grabbed your bag, and locked the front door behind you and started making your way to ellie’s gym.
you got there around seven and you didn’t see jesses car yet but you did see hers. ellie’s beat up 2000 green honda cry sat in a spot towards the back of the parking lot. memories of you leaning on her window practically admitting you liked when she called you sweetheart and the peaceful feeling of comfortable silence you both held.
you heard someone call your name in the distance to turn and see dina getting out of the car, you were so concentrated on ellies car you didn’t even see them pull in. you made your way over and greeted them with a hug as dina wrapped your arm in hers and dragged you in with her, jesse following behind. you tried to calm your nerves but it just wasn’t working. not nervous about being here, even after what happened outside with the man last time, but of seeing her again. you’ve only spoken to her a handful of times but you thought of her more times than you can count.
as soon as you made it closer towards the front door, it was loud, like the first time you were here. loud people, loud lights, loud everything but now knowing it was ellie’s changed it. jesse held the door as dina went in first and you both followed. florescent lights beamed from above you, shining on the sweaty bodies in the gym. it was just like it was the first time you came. your nerves followed you everywhere, but it was worth seeing her again.
you went in and dina guided you guys to the same table you had last time. you wonder if they sit here every time. you looked around for ellie but you didn’t see her anywhere. you saw her car so she has to be here.
dina and jesse got up to go get drinks from the makeshift bar while you sat and waited for them to bring back your drink. you looked over to them waiting their turn when you heard something behind you.
“hey sweetheart,” she whispered close to your ear, and before you could respond she pulled out the the seat next to you and sat down.
“hey ellie,” you said almost startled. she was wearing a pair of skinny jeans, a black t shirt and all her tattoos were showing this time. it was almost mind blowing seeing her and you couldn’t even explain what it did to you. you don’t understand why a girl you barely know has this effect on you.
“i told you to call me el,” she said and laughed kindly towards you, “i have the stuff for you” she finished.
“oh thank you, i’d hope so considering that’s the reason i came,” you joked.
“wait you mean you didn’t come to see me?” she said sounding fake hurt.
“that was just a plus,” you flirted. dina and jesse came back to the table with the drinks before she responded to you and they both greeted ellie as they sat.
“hey els we didn’t see you before we ordered the drinks, i can go get one for ya?” jesse asked her.
“nah i’ll wait til the next round, thanks though” she told him. she smiled at you and the conversation started between all four of you, before you knew it an hour and a half passed, you had more three more rounds and just enjoyed your friday night. the match started and you find it so convenient that you can still see the ring from where the table is so theres no need to get up and watch considering its not ellie up there.
you watched for a bit until it was coming to the end, cheering erupted and ellie told dina and jesse that she was going out for a smoke, before she got up, she leaned over to you and whispered “you coming sweetheart?” softly in your ear, her face inches away from yours, then she moved back and smiled. she held out her hand and you held it as she pulled you up with her as you blushed so hard, you swear you turned into a tomato.
your eyes stayed on her hand holding yours and the beautiful moth tattoo covering her arm, not believing that she’s actually touching you again. you followed behind her as she moved with you through the gym towards the door, as you walked out still hand in hand you saw the side of the building, it was the same place she defended you the first time you met her.
she lead you over to a bench that you never even realized was there. your hands broke as you both sat, she went pull out her cigarette pack and the lighter from her back pocket when she noticed you were staring at her still. she smirked as she opened the pack, and surprisingly pulled out a joint. she put it in her mouth and brought the lighter up to it before telling you “its not polite to stare sweetheart.”
you blushed and looked away as soon as she said it. she laughed and she passed the joint to you, you told her you just couldn’t help it. and you really couldn’t, she’s breathtaking. the way her freckles danced across her whole face, her eyes had a small tint of brown circling her iris, the scar on her right eyebrow, the way her lips just sat perfectly on her face. you so badly want to reach out and touch them again.
you hit it a couple times, you are sure your cheeks haven’t been back to normal since you saw her and you wonder if she’s noticed. you passed her back the joint and she staring at you taking in every detail of you too as she brought it to her mouth and took a hit. blowing out the smoke she smirked, and said “i can’t either sweetheart.”
she leaned back against the bench, legs spread a little as she handed you the joint and asked, “so what brought you here besides jesse?” she acquired. you told her about living in brooklyn, above the cafe you worked and how your time spent there wasn’t totally great but the real reason was running from a shitty past, you weren’t ready to tell her specifics but you told her that’s why you left, you had to get away from what happened there but it was more like who. she told you she understood and then she told you “well i’m glad you’ve made your way here sweetheart.”
you don’t know if it was the alcohol or weed but you sat outside on the bench for another 20 minutes, smoking and laughing as you talked about so much: you talked about the tv shows you’re both watching, the albums you had on repeat, the guilty pleasures you both had and what you both did in your free time. you spoke to one another like you’ve known each other for years. it just feels so good to talk to someone like this again.
she learned that your parents live in portland, so moving coasts was a big deal but you felt like you were on auto-pilot growing up and you knew you had to get out when you could, she learned that you dropped out of college two years and haven’t made any plans to go back but you would like to. you told her a couple funny stories about you and jesse growing up and she laughed at them all.
you found out that she plays guitar and that she spends time drawing and journaling. you learn that ellie was adopted when she was 14, she grew up in boston, and she has an older sister named sarah but that she doesn’t come around much anymore since she gotten married. she told you that her dad passed away from a heart attack about a year ago and since then, her and her uncle tommy.
“im sorry to hear about your dad els” you sympathized.
“its okay sweetheart, just fucking sucks sometimes.” she responded softly as she put the joint out next to her and slipped it back in her cigarette pack. instead this time she pulled out a cigarette and lit that this time. she slid it in her pocket before she stood up off the bench, offering you her hand again and said you should probably head back inside.
you grabbed her warm hand and stood up to follow her, you started the walk towards the side door but before she opened it, she turned around to you and faced you.
“hey sweetheart?” she asked.
“yes els?” you waited for her to continue, her hand still covering yours.
“im glad you came sweetheart, this was nice, i mean as nice as it gets sitting on the side of this place,” she laughed softly, you felt like she was closer than ever but maybe because you just wanted her to be, “you know, id love to do this again.. and maybe play you something on my guitar.. if you want.” she said almost nervously, feeling the urge to look away from you.
“i would love that els.” you said, looking up from staring at your hands together to smiling in her face. you cant believe she asked you, part of you prayed she would, you knew there was a connection here. she realized it too. your eye contact never faded as you stood here.
“great, im looking forward to it more than you know,” she told you sweetly. she let go out hand and you felt slight disappoint in your heart as you assumed she was going to turn around and open the door and this moment would be over. instead, she brought her hand up to your face and let it rest on your cheek as she brushed her thumb over it. the touch of her warm hand sent sparks through your body this time and you couldn’t be bothered moving as she grew closer to you.
“you have no idea how much i wanna kiss you right now.” she whispered, from only what felt like two inches away from your lips. fuck, you thought silently. she was so close to you, you could feel her breathe as she spoke.
“please do it.” you practically whined, you couldn’t take this anymore. all you wanted to do was feel her lips on yours. after you spoke, you felt her thumb move from your cheek to brushing your lips softly. the drinks you had definitely brought out your confident and the want you had for her.
“oh sweetheart,” she purred towards you, “how badly i want to but it has to be more special than this.” she said moving her thumb back to your red cheek.
“just as long as it happens el,” you responded, breathing heavier as your nerves grew in anticipation.
she nodded as she slowly moved her hand off your face and brought it down to your hip and gave it a squeeze, still smiling at you as she reached to open the door and let you through in front of her.
you walk back into the gym and went to find jesse and dina. you saw jesse at the bar and ellie went over to him, telling you she was getting more drinks. you went over to dina at the table and took a seat next to her. you asked her how the match went and she told you same as always and nothing crazy this time.
“you guys were out there for a while, whats up with that?” dina asked while smirking and wiggling her eyebrows at you.
“dina…” you laughed, “we just smoked and talked for a bit.” you replied to her.
“sureeee that’s all, we see the way you look at her!”, she squealed, “and the way she looks at you, it just seems pretty obvious.”
you laughed and told her that nothing happened yet but you did admit to her that you wanted it to.
“stop we knew it!” she laughed loudly and hit the table in excitement. you pulled your hands to your face that was full of embarrassment.
“what do you mean you knew it, was it obvious?” you gasped. your eyes darting towards ellie at the makeshift bar.
“to me and jesse yes.” she told you still smiling over the fact that her two friends maybe starting something new soon.
as you went to reply, the drinks were on the table, jesse and ellie were back already at the table pulling their chairs. the conversation between you and dina came to a halt as you all started talking. you all sat, conversing and finished your last round by the time it hit around 11 pm. you were getting tired and you were definitely drunk after all the rounds of drinks everyone bought. the matches ended an hour ago and you guys were the last few people left besides the lady behind the bar and a couple stragglers paying their tab and chatting.
“hey i think me and d are gonna head out,” he said looking over to dina, who was definitely feeling all the drinks she had, he laughed and said, “this one needs to make it home into bed. can you make it home okay? i can take you now if you need” he asked talking to you.
“no i’m gonna take her home.” ellie cut in before you could respond. you looked at her and smiled as jesse told you to text when you both got home safe. he helped dina up and they made their way to the door. your eyes followed til they left and then you turned to ellie, who was already staring at you.
“that okay sweetheart? that i take you home again?” she asked smirking towards you.
“yeah els, that’s okay.” you blushed as she stood up and put her hand out for the third time tonight. you connected your hands again. touching her had your skin was burning up. you followed her into a back office. paperwork, receipts, and random things littered the room. as you looked around and saw a decent couch, a safe in the corner and a coffee area on a little table and a large desk with folders and boxes of things you didn’t know.
you watched as ellie disconnected your hands to go over to pick up her backpack from the side of the couch and then she grabbed a jacket she had hanging over the deck of the chair to the desk, she slid it over her shoulders then grabbed a piece of paper, writing something non legible from where you were standing. she smiled when she turned towards you and held her arm out motioning to the door for you guys to exit.
the stragglers were gone and the bartender bid ellie goodnight as she walked out the front door. you walked the distance of the gym and made it to the door with ellie, she leaned over and turned the lights off and then held the door opened for you.
you told her thank you and she nodded towards you, “i think we should walk, it’s not far from your apartment.” she spoke looking towards you for confirmation as she turned and locked up the gym for the night.
“that’s okay but how are you going to get home without your car?” you asked. you didn’t want her walking home alone either, you knew she could handle herself but still, the thought made you worry.
“i’m only 5 minutes away from you actually so its not far, ill be back for my car tomorrow.” she told you. you nodded and both of you continued to walk the sidewalk in a comfortable silence next to each other. you glanced up at the sky, noticing the stars and the way the moon beamed over the city. it was so much cooler now than it was earlier and you moved to brush over the goosebumps that covered your arms. ellie noticed your movement and took off her jacket. you turned when you noticed what she was going and told her, “no its okay we’ll be there soon i don’t need it.”
“sorry sweetheart, got to make sure you stay warm.” she smirked as she put it over your shoulders and watched as you put your arms in. you smiled to her as you readjusted it and continued the walk to your place. the smell of her engulfed you and you’ve never felt so comfortable.
“its so beautiful.” you whispered, “and quiet, new york was never like this. they don’t lie when they say the city never sleeps ya know?” you finished.
the city you moved to that you wish you could escape from. the shitty and abusive relationship you wish you could leave behind. the things you tried the most to forget. you never spoke about it, you just ran. the city you wished had better memories connected with it. but now all you want is to create new memories.
when you moved across the country, you told yourself that you’re not getting into anything here because you know you need to heal from the those years of abuse and insecurity so the last thing you expected was to meet ellie and end up feeling this way about her. you don’t want this to happen and you ruin it because you aren’t okay but with her, you feel like you could be okay one day.
“i could only imagine, boston was a busy place too but not the same, it always is quiet here.” she chuckled softly.
“i love it, things finally seem calm now.” you smiled as you looked her. she took in the sight of you in her jacket and she loved it. she can only imagine seeing you wear her t shirts… or nothing at all. she shook the thoughts from her head but she just couldn’t help it. you were the most beautiful girl she’d ever seen. you were breathtaking. she couldn’t believe she’d met someone like you in this shitty small town.
the town where her dad and her moved, and the memories of them together haunted her. now that he was gone, she knew a piece of her was missing. things were incomplete without him. he was all she thought about, the guilt of what happened and how she couldn’t do anything to stop it.
the only time ellie wasn’t thinking about joel was when she was thinking about you, she was grateful that she met you. she didn’t know what this was going to turn into but she hoped it would be something. she sees the effects she has on you and she wishes she really knew how to communicate with you that she feels the same way about you.
you continued the walk in a comfortable silence, both of you wrapped in your thoughts of each another and eventually made it to the front of your building. you turned to face her with a smile,“here i am,” you spoke softly to her, not wanting the night to come to an end.
“here you are, thank you for letting me take you home sweetheart, call it peace of mind,” she admitted.
“thank you for walking me els… do you want to come up?” you said without a thought. you didn’t know if this is was the alcohol talking but you know you didn’t regret it when you said it and you wish that’s what you could blame it on but you knew you wanted this even sober.
“if you want me to sweetheart” she smirked as she responded.
you stepped closer to her as you looked at her, only a couple inches away from her face, watching her eyes move from your eyes to your lips. you knew you both could feel the tension.
“please just say yes.” you sighed wishing you could feel her lips on yours already.
“okay sweetheart, lets go.” she pulled away but connected your hands and it took you a second to recognize that she agreed. you turned around, suddenly nervous about the fact that she’s going to see where you spend your days. you opened the door to the lobby, and ellie held the door as you both walked in. she followed you up the stairs by the front, and you made your way to the front door as you held ellie’s hand in one and used the other to pull your keys from your bag.
you unlocked the door and you brought ellie in with you before the door was shut and you were locking it. you took off her jacket and put it on your coat rack and turned to look at her.
“okay it’s kind of a mess so i’m sorry but-“ you started before she cut you off.
“sweetheart, your place is practically spotless, you should see mine.” ellie laughed.
you laughed as you pulled ellie over to the green couch that took up a lot of your living room but it was a dream purchase and you loved it. you told ellie to take a seat as you walked over to the kitchen and grabbed some water for you both. as you were walking back towards her, she was digging around in her backpack. as you placed the waters down and took a seat, she pulled out weed in a jar and handed it to you.
“here this is yours.” she said.
“oh thank you! i totally forgot, do you want to smoke now- fuck i don’t think i have anything to roll with.” you told her as you went to open the windows in your living room.
instead of saying anything, she reached back into her backpack and pulled out a jar of already rolled joints.
“i came prepared.” she laughed, “and you won’t owe me anything for that.” she said, motioning to the stuff she gave you as her hands were cracking open the jar of pre-rolls.
“ellie- no i’ll give you the cash,” but she shook her head no and brought the lighter to the joint between her lips.
“no, it’s on me, don’t worry about it.” she responded as she took a hit.
“do you give other people weed for free?” you asked, looking at her as she was smoking while sitting next to you on the couch. you wish you could stay like this forever.
“only pretty girls that i like…” she said sweetly as you held eye contact as she handed you the joint.
“oh so you think i’m pretty?” you teased her as you took a hit.
“sweetheart, i think you’re the prettiest girl i’ve ever seen.” she told you. you instantly blush and look away from her, trying not to choke on the smoke you held in your lungs.
“thank you els, i think you’re beautiful.” you said to her. when you looked up, you saw her cheeks tint lightly as she grabbed the joint you held out to her.
“thanks sweetheart.” she said as she put the joint down on a cup at the table you’d been using as an ashtray and she brought her hand up and held your cheek like she did earlier. you couldn’t help yourself as you nuzzled your face into her warm hand. your eye contact only made the tension in the room worse.
“you really are beautiful… sweetheart, can i?” she asked as she looked down at your lips. you nodded and as she came closer, your lips just barely brushing, as she asked, “i need to hear you pretty girl.”
“yes please els- please just kiss me already.” you begged.
her lips were on yours before you could even realized this was actually happening. your lips moved slow together at first but you couldn’t help yourself from deepening the kiss as ellie brought her other hand up and tangled it in your hair as you moaned, her tongue slipped into your mouth, both of you tasting the weed and alcohol you consumed.
one of your hand rested against her chest and the other gripping her arm as you melted into the kiss. both ellie’s hands were in your hair now as your tongues continued to fight for dominance but you let her win and moaned again and she swallowed it as she kissed you.
ellie pulled your leg over her lap so you straddled her, never breaking your lips apart. your lips continued to move in sync as you grinded against her. her hands on your hips moving with you. your lips stay connected until you broke the kiss to come up for air and rested your forehead on hers.
“you okay sweetheart?” ellie panted as she caught her breath too.
“yes els just need a second.” you said as your eyes stayed shut while you tried to control your breathing. you couldn’t believe that you guys finally kissed. the tension was killing you both and now it’s finally happened.
“hey it’s okay, take your time sweetheart.” ellie said as she rubbed a hand along your thigh at a comfortable pace, brushing the cloth from your shorts as she moved it. she brought the other one up to your cheek and lifted your head to look at you. you looked tired and ellie didn’t want to take full advantage of you after you guys had been drinking and smoking all night.
“hey sweetheart, lets get you to bed, we’ll finish this another time i promise.” she said sweetly as you mumbled an “okay els thank you,” and moved off her lap to sit back on the couch. ellie stood up and offered her hand. you stood up and walked both of you to your bedroom.
you moved to sit on the edge of your king sized bed and ellie stood in front of you still holding your hand as you asked her if she wanted to stay the night because it was late and you didn’t want her walking home.
“sure sweetheart i’ll sleep on the couch, and only for your peace of mind.” she chuckled, thinking back to the conversation earlier.
“els we can share the bed, it’s okay, i’ll keep my hands to myself.” you joked and she laughed.
“i don’t think i’d be complaining if you couldn’t but i’m okay on the couch.” ellie insisted.
“els please just lay with me.” you said looking up at her as she moved her hand to rest on your cheek again.
“okay sweetheart.” she finally agreed.
you smiled up at her and you took ellie’s hand from your face and guided her into the bathroom connected to your room. she watched as you bent down and opened the sink cabinet and grabbed a toothbrush. you turned around and handed it to her with a smile. you guys brushed your teeth and then went back into your bedroom.
ellie stood here as you moved across the room to your dresser, and pulled out a t-shirt and a pair of shorts from your drawer and handed them over to ellie. she told you thank you and you smiled at her. ellie walked into the bathroom to change and you walked back to the dresser. you stripped yourself of your shirt and bra before throwing on a different oversized tee and changing your underwear. you didn’t even realize you were soaked after what happened on the couch.
ellie watched you as she leaned against the bathroom door frame as you untangled the sides of your underwear after you pulled them up.
“you’re perfect”, she thought in head before speaking out loud. “thanks sweetheart.” you turned around when ellie spoke, sending her a smile before you moved to your side of the bed, you grabbed the duvet and moved it so you both were able to get in your bed.
you and ellie laid facing each other in a comfortable silence as you were both growing incredibly tired. you felt your eyes starting to get heavy and felt ellie’s hand brush your hair back from your face so you kept your eyes open to look at her.
“el?” you whispered.
“yes sweetheart?” she spoke quietly back to you.
“i really like you… i don’t know if this is too early but it just feels right.”
“i feel it too sweetheart, i like you too so don’t worry,” ellie said softly, hand still holding your face, “now get some sleep, we’ll talk more in the morning pretty girl.”
“goodnight els.” you whispered.
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