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#viv miedema
meademalove · 13 hours
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Viv's smile can light up the whole world, so beautiful. ❤️
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alotofpockets · 2 months
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Panic attack | Vivianne Miedema
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Pairing: Vivianne Miedema x Arsenal!Reader
Summary: You have a panic attack while in the gym with your teammates. Viv is there to help you through it.
Warnings: Reader has a panic attack.
Masterlist | Woso masterlist | Words: 1.5k
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Vivianne knocked on your door a couple hours before training would start. “Hi baby, what are you doing here? I thought you would pick me up in two hours?” You ask as you let your girlfriend into your apartment. “I was hoping I could take you out for breakfast.” You place a soft kiss onto her lips. “I'd love to, just give me a moment to get dressed.” You gesture to your pyjamas, which actually just consisted of a t-shirt from Viv, paired with an old pair of Viv’s national team shorts. Viv looks after you when you walk out of the room with a big smile on her face. She loved it when you wore her clothes. 
Within a few minutes you were out the door, and off to the restaurant that Viv had in mind. It was nice to get in some time together before you would be surrounded by your teammates for the rest of the day. Not to be mistaken, you loved your teammates at Arsenal dearly, they just didn't know about your relationship just yet. The two of you had decided to keep it to yourselves for now, your teammates were like family, but you knew they would be all over your relationship if they knew about it.
Breakfast at the small restaurant with Viv by your side was the best start to your morning. She drove you home, and walked you back to your front door. “Thank you for breakfast.” You say before you kiss her. “Thank you for agreeing to be my date.” She jokes back. “I love you, Viv.” You opened the door to your apartment, and let her go inside first. “I love you too.” Viv says back while bringing you in for a hug. The both of you change into your training kits before Viv drives you over to the training grounds.
Viv often drove you to practice before the two of you had started dating, as you lived on route for the striker, so you decided that this wouldn’t be a factor in your teammates finding out about your relationship. It was always nice to have some extra time with your girlfriend before you would head your separate ways for training.
Training today was in the gym. Strength training wasn’t exactly your favourite. Of course, you were well aware of the positive effects strength training had on your body physically, however for you it tended to have negative effects mentally. On the pitch your mind was clear, running was very good for your mental health. In the gym, your mind was always racing. 
That’s how you found yourself laying on the bench press, the weights were loaded on for a new PR but you couldn’t set yourself to actually lift the weights. It wasn’t because you were afraid to try and lift the weight, you had been in your head the whole morning about the match you’d be playing in the weekend. Though, your spotter, Katie, thought it was because it would be a new PR. “You don’t have to try for a new PR. I can just take some weight off, and do your regular sets if you’d prefer that.” You couldn’t find the words to tell her that it had nothing to do with the weights.
It was getting harder for you to breathe, so you sat up, hoping it would let the air flow more freely. That wasn’t the case, as you felt your panic attack start crashing down. Your eyes turned glassy, and your chest was going up and down rapidly. Katie kneeled down next to you, “Hey, it’s okay. Take a deep breath in.” She placed a hand on your knee, “And out.”
Katie was trying her best to help you, but quite honestly, she had no idea what to do. She tried to get your breathing back to normal but it didn’t help. A few of your teammates started to form around you, not that you noticed. They were all worried, Alessia tried asking you what you needed. With everything in you, you tried to say VIv’s name but you knew there was barely any sound behind it. They tried figuring out what you were trying to say, Katie was the first to say it, “Viv?” You reach down to touch the hand she has on your knee. “You want us to get Viv?” With another squeeze to her hand, you try to communicate the word yes. “Someone go get Viv.” Katie orders, not wanting to leave your side herself. 
Alessia sprints away to get Viv, the latter being on the other side of the gym, and had not yet noticed the commotion. “Viv, you need to come with me.” Alessia says when she made it to VIv’s side. “I have a few more sets left, can it wait a few minutes?” Alessia shakes her head, “It’s y/n, I think she’s having a panic attack.” Viv drops the weight she was holding immediately, and runs after Alessia.  
She sits behind you on the bench and wraps her arms around you tightly. In this moment, she couldn’t care less about the team finding out about your relationship, she just wanted you to be okay. You find her hands, and she intertwines her fingers with yours as she wraps her arms around your body again. The feeling of her pressed against you helped ground you a little bit. 
Viv started softly whispering into your ear. “It’s okay, baby. I’ve got you. Keep breathing with me, okay? It’s all going to be okay.” Katie had ushered everyone to take a step back, to give you some space. The girls stood to the side nervously, they had never seen you like this before. Some of them had never even seen someone have a panic attack before.
The constant voice of your girlfriend, and the pressure from her surrounding you, managed to pull you out of your panic attack slowly. You leaned into Viv’s body, her signal to move on to the next step that helped you. It was a trick that your therapist had taught you, one that you had found stupid at first, but once put to practice, you found out that it actually helped. “Ready, baby?” You squeeze her hand softly. “Okay, name me five things that you can see.”
It took a moment for your eyes to get back into focus. With a shaky voice you start naming your surroundings. “Your hands, the bench, gym equipment, water bottle, and the team.” Viv hums next to your ear, “Very good, baby, can you name me four things you can feel?” You close your eyes again for this one. “You, the ground, the bench, and the air.” She kisses your shoulder softly, “You’re doing amazing. How about three things you can hear?” Your breathing was already starting to get more regular. “You, my breath, and the team.” 
“Can you take a deep breath for me?” You nod and breathe in deeply, letting out the air slowly. Viv wanted to check if you were indeed doing as well with your breathing as she thought you did. After a few more deep breaths, she realised that she didn’t need to continue with the rest of the steps, as your breathing had returned to its natural rhythm. 
Your body stays pressed against your girlfriend, the comfort she was bringing you helping you come down from the panic attack. Katie walked closer again, your water bottle in hand. “Here, take this.” She says when she hands it to you. “Thank you, Katie.” The both of you knew it wasn’t just for the water bottle, but also for her attempts to help you earlier. “So, you two?” Katie motions between the two of you with a smirk on her face. There was no way of hiding it now, so you nod. “Yeah.” The confirmation said with a smile. The chatter from the rest of the team starts to pick up again, now that they knew that you were okay.. 
“Do you need anything, baby?” Viv’s voice is still soft. “I think I want to run for a bit, instead of being in the gym.” She stands up and holds her hands out for you to take. “Can I join you, or would you rather run on by yourself?” You let her help you up. “Can you come with me, please?” 
Viv takes your hand and walks you to the training fields. “Do you want to talk about what happened?” You shake your head. “Not now, but do you maybe want to come over after practice and then we can?” She gives your hand a loving squeeze. “Yes, of course.” With that plan set in place, you have reached the field, and start running together. 
Your mind full of thoughts emptied the moment you ran your first lap around the pitch. The cold air hitting your face, the way your boots hit the ground. Something about running had always felt safe to you, it helped ground you. You were grateful for Viv, she always knew what you needed, and was able to give you another safe space, by being one.
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delfiore · 3 months
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—DO YOU THINK I HAVE FORGOTTEN ABOUT YOU?
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pairing: leah williamson x reader
synopsis: in the end, what is meant to be will always be. or; leah struggles after the break up.
word count: 4.5k
a/n: this is a continuation of LIKE REAL PEOPLE DO. i just have to make things angsty i’m sry, if i don’t i start gnawing at the bars of my enclosure but worry not, this will turn fluffy in the end :)
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EIGHT. Paris.
It took about 45 mins for Leah to decide that she longer wanted to be in this damned opera house.
The red carpet was exhausting enough, but she powered through it, familiar faces like Amelia DiMoldenberg’s making it barely enough to get through.
The dinner had gone into an intermission, and she had a moment to relax from the cameras, being sat at a table not far from the stage. Ever since she first attended the GQ Men of the Year Dinner a few years ago, it had created a lot of buzz around her every year, fans speculating whether she would come again, donning outfits so foreign on her body. Back then, she still had a support system that she looked forward to coming home to. Now, maybe the only positive to this night was that, whatever happened, she would eventually get to go home and sleep by the end of it.
She had to tilt her head all the way up to get a full glimpse of the ceiling. The Royal Opera House wasn’t the oldest building erected in London by far, but it was one of most interesting to look at, if she wasn’t so in love with her club and the look of the Emirates that was. It was grandiose, regal and typical of Baroque architecture, the concave ceiling arching over her, stretching all the way back to the five balconies—generously lit and horse-shoe-shaped seating areas—stacked on top of each other. It looked a little bit like the Théâtre du Châtelet in Paris that she got to see when she attended the Ballon d’Or for the first time a couple of years ago. A lot of things can change in two years, and Leah wasn’t sure whether it was for the better or not.
Her agent caught her in the middle of her admiring when he gave her shoulder a light tap, telling her that she was expected at the after-party too. Great, another two hours she’d have to endure as people praise her name for achievements unworthy of praise, just because she was Leah Williamson, captain of the Lionesses. But whatever else he said after that, Leah didn’t register, because her eyes had found a familiar frame standing a few tables away.
You looked dashing in your black nighttime attire, which sparkled every time the limelight happened to sweep past you. A gentle smile adorned your face as you conversed your heart away with a couple of actors whose names were lost on her. When you put your hand on one of them and laughed, your eyed darted over to her for a split second.
Only when those actors had left, did she even think of approaching you, but her feet were planted on the ground.
One, two, three, she counted in her head. One, two, three; come on, Leah . . .
“Hi, you!” There was a residual cheerfulness from your previous conversation in your voice. “It’s been a while.”
“Yeah,” she tried to chuckle away her nerves, wiping the sweat in her hands on her pant legs. “You been okay?”
“Yeah,” you said it so softly that she almost missed it, if she wasn’t watching your lips. “Are you? Beth says you don’t come around her place anymore.”
“You still talk to Beth?”
“Yeah, she’s my friend, Lee. I . . . hope you don’t mind.”
“No! No, that’s . . . it’s great.” Leah said quickly.
You had smiled at her gratefully, and grasped her hand. “It’s good seeing you again.”
“You too.” She had said, robotically, before deciding against it. “Hey, don’t be a stranger, alright?”
You smiled again. This time, you brought her into your chest and wrapped your arms around her neck. “You first,” you said with a glint in your eyes, then you disappeared into the crowd.
And for a few brief moments, Leah Williamson didn’t think about how exhausted she was, only about how much she has missed being held by you. After all, it had been almost two years since she and you broke up, and maybe Leah was never able to move on like she had promised you.
How could she?
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NINE. Be My Mistake.
She hated the feeling afterwards. She hated herself for having initiated it, for chasing after the girl like a hungry wolf in that nightclub. Now, Leah couldn’t bear the feeling of her lanky arms and sweaty skin touching her, like the intimacy was warranted, like she had somehow earned it.
Leah knew it was begrudging of her to shove the girl’s arm away so heartlessly and move upright to the edge of the bed, but she didn’t care. She couldn’t bring herself to be intimate with someone else, not yet. Not when every time she felt her skin she imagined yours, soft and scented with your familiar smell; every time she closed her eyes she saw your face like a ghost, refusing to leave her psyche; every time she opened her mouth to let out a noise of pleasure, it took everything in her to hold herself back from uttering Y/N, Y/N, Y/N.
The girl was confused but she was still, no doubt trying to decipher the sudden shift in Leah’s demeanor. She hated her stillness, the way her eyes watched her frame like she was a wounded animal in its enclosure.
“Please leave,” Leah said quietly, begging.
Silence.
“I don’t know what you’re going through, but if . . . you need someone—”
“Thank you, Delaney.” She gritted her teeth. “Please get out.”
Tonight, it was Delaney with the fiery red hair and dimples peppered over her cheekbones. A few nights ago, it was Lisa-Mae with the sultry brown eyes and unforgettable plump lips. Then there might have been an Erin and Hailey and Polly and maybe even a Daniela from when she visited Keira in Barcelona. She hated that she somehow remembered all of their names and kept count. Body upon body, yet she could not forget the one body she was using them all to forget about.
She couldn’t turn to alcohol, couldn’t smoke or do hard drugs because they would affect her performance on the pitch, but God knows she was thinking about it constantly. Anything to take this pain away for a moment, lest she turns into the starving wolf and goes out to hunt at night again. If only the press caught on to what she was doing.
Righteous Lioness turned starving wolf the moment the loneliness becomes a little too much to bare.
But she knew you wouldn’t have judged her. No, you would wrap her in your arms and let her scream, cry, do whatever she wanted to rid herself of the torment. She remembered all the nights you spent on the bathroom floor with her as she battled through her endometriosis, and how you would hold her like the world was about to collapse outside the window.
Leah was on the bathroom floor again, but she was alone this time, and the floor tiles felt colder and harsher than she had remembered.
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TEN. Tonight (I Wish I Was Your Boy).
The feeling she got when the three whistles finally blew came to Leah quite rarely. It was one of elation and immense joy that the result of the game was finalized, because she had known half an hour ago that Arsenal would bring home the crucial three points from the match.
She brought her fists in the air as she made her rounds, patting her teammates on the back and shaking hands with opponents. She found Kyra and hoisted her in the air with a tight hug, as her younger teammate managed to score and assist today.
“Thank you, Leah.” Kyra giggled, as she was put down. “Is Y/N here?”
Leah’s smile remained, but she scrunched her eyebrows. “How did you hear about that?”
“How could I not? Y/N Y/L/N, coming to watch us play. I won’t be surprised if social media was buzzing about that rather than the actual match.”
If Kyra knew, that meant the entire team knew. She would endure the endless teasing if it meant getting to see you again, though.
Leah had found where you were sitting right from the start, in the VIP box where her friends and family sat, the usual spot you occupied when you were still together. Back then, she would watch you jog down the stairs with a blinding grin on your face, hop over the barricade and pull her into a bone-crushing hug. It could be a sold-out Emirates Stadium, but the only thing she wanted to watch was you. She still wanted to.
“Hi! Great game today.” You didn’t hug her, but did something far worse. You swung your arm and gave her bicep a quick pat, like a friend would.
“Thanks,” she said. “Should have scored that header though.”
“Hey, don’t put yourself down like that. You were great.” Somehow, your words made her feel worse about herself, and she just wanted to crawl into a hole and never come out again. They felt patronizing.
Not far away, Beth’s joyful laughter cut through her sulking. Turning to look at the woman, she saw Beth wrapping her arms tightly around Viv’s neck and the Dutch spinning her around gleefully. Viv had managed to score a hat-trick today—her first since returning from her ACL injury—and even if she didn’t celebrate such an important feat, she would be dragged into one because her girlfriend definitely wouldn’t leave it alone.
It reminded her of when she would come home and celebrate her wins with you. She didn’t need any fancy parties or lavish gifts, just being in your company was more than enough. You would always end up buying her gifts though. “Just because”, you would say, the I love you going unspoken, but she knew it was there. She could always feel it hanging in the silence, in the spaces in your home, even when you were half a world away filming. She could always feel it, like a hearth, a palpable warmth flickering in her chest.
It made her envious watching Beth and Viv that they had what she once did.
“Y/N! You made it!” Beth’s voice tore Leah from her thoughts.
Despite her sentimental predicament, a chuckle made its way onto her lips as she watched you embrace Beth like two schoolgirls finally united again after the summer holidays.
“How long are you staying in London?” Beth asked.
“I don’t know, really,” you replied. “I’m doing a thing with Stella McCartney, so it might take a while.”
Leah couldn’t help but perk up at that. She could feel Viv glancing at her from the corner of her eyes.
“No way! Look at ya. Moving on to the fashion world already!” Beth exclaimed and gave your shoulder a light shove.
Only when you and Beth had walked away happily chatting did Vivianne elbow her gently.
“They seem happy,” the Dutch said.
“Yeah,” Leah pursed her lips. “That’s good.”
“And you? Are you happy?”
Leah knew that the both of them knew she wasn’t, but that wasn’t the right answer. She would not admit to something that she has been working for two years to get over, because it would mean that her woes were all for nothing.
“I am,” she nodded. “I’m glad they’re happy.”
If anything, Leah still loved you enough to admit that.
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ELEVEN. Me.
Leah didn’t sleep much these days. She never really did—adrenaline being her biggest enemy—but she would find herself crying in frustration at four in the morning, unable to fall asleep.
It would be during those torturous hours that she would reminisce on the conversation in which she pulled the plug on your relationship.
It was a slippery slope of miscommunication, both of you were to blame, but she was the one who decided to run away instead of trying to work it out. She still kept the ring in a drawer somewhere, but the memory of your rejection made it to painful to look at.
In hindsight, she could have said it a bit differently, but she was close to exploding the previous days that all of it came flooding out of her.
She replayed the conversation often, like a broken record in her head, swapping out things that she could have said or you could have said that would have lead to a different outcome, maybe one in which she wasn’t so miserable two years on.
It was 1:43am, and she was wide awake yet again. You’d always had an irregular sleep pattern, and she wondered whether you were awake too.
She knew it was a mistake, and that she would regret it in the morning, but she texted you anyway.
hey are u awake?
Slamming her phone on the other side of the bed, Leah curled in on herself, burying her face in the pillows trying not to cry. If she hadn’t looked up in time, she would almost miss the incoming call on her screen. It was you.
“Hey,” she picked up after sniffling her tears away.
“Hey, you,” your voice was soft and lulling. “What an odd time for a footballer to be awake. Shouldn’t you be getting your beauty sleep?”
This made her chuckle. “If I did get all of my beauty sleep, you lot would have no chance.”
“Watch out, everyone. Leah Williamson’s ego is inflating, try not get crushed by it.”
As Leah’s laughter died down, she felt an awkwardness settled over the line. A silence once so comfortable now felt forced, straining under the pull between what once was and the ruins of it. The heavy weight of unspoken words curled on the tip of her tongue, the broken record of her mistake playing ever louder in her head.
“I didn’t expect to hear from you,” you finally broke the silence, your voice teetering between caution and curiosity.
“Yeah, well, insomnia makes one do questionable things.”
Leah wondered if she had accidentally revealed too much, and whether it was appropriate to do so. You two weren’t intimate anymore, you were barely friends nowadays, the finest thread of your acquaintance lied solely on your hangouts with Beth. How strange it was, you were half of her soul. Now you were almost like passersby on the street.
“Is everything okay?” You asked, a sense of concern in your tone.
“Um,” she hummed, trying to pull herself together. “Not really. I-I haven’t been doing too well.”
“Leah,” you said. “I-I know we’re not as close as we were before, but I wasn’t lying when I said I still want us to be friendly at least. I’m here for you. You know that, right?”
“I know.” She said, her voice wavering. She wouldn’t be able to hide her feelings from you, never you. “I know. I’m sorry I didn’t reach out sooner.”
“It’s okay, Lee. It hurt me a lot, not gonna lie, but I understand where you were coming from.”
Leah couldn’t hold it in anymore, and squeezed her eyes shut, her tears wetting the pillow she lay on. “I can’t be your friend, Y/N. I can’t just pretend like the last five years didn’t happen.”
There was a brief silence once more before you spoke. “I know. Might be selfish of me to wish things were different.”
“Then I’m selfish too,” she said, almost a whisper.
There was a pause, in which Leah bit the inside of her cheeks so hard they might start bleeding.
“Are you coming to Beth’s thing on Friday?” You asked.
“I think I’m expected to be there. Why?”
“Good, I’ll be there too. We’ll talk then.”
“Okay,” Leah said dumbly.
“Now, go to sleep.”
She giggled. “You first.”
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TWELVE. Sincerity Is Scary.
Leah’s teammates have teased her many times throughout the evening, stating her unnecessary brooding was actually unnecessary this time and that she should liven up. She really couldn’t. Just thinking about seeing you again tonight made her want to have a heart attack and end her misery right there.
But the moment she heard your voice as you stepped into Beth and Viv’s house, a bottle of wine in hand and a bright smile on your lips, Leah felt her anxiety dissipate into oblivion, scolding herself for ever feeling nervous.
After all, it was you.
She waited patiently with a soft smile, her arms folded behind her back as she waited for all the girls to swoon over you. She had all night to keep you company, she was in no rush.
“Hey,” you found her after all the canoodling. Extending an arm, you awaited a hug which she gladly accepted.
“Hi,” she offered to take your jacket and hung it on the rack by the door. “You got here alright?”
“Man, the traffic at rush hour,” you sighed exasperatedly. “That’s the one thing I’ll never get used to. Almost makes me miss you being my personal chauffeur.”
She laughed. “That’s the only thing I was good for, was it?”
You narrowed your eyes at her teasingly. “Not just that.”
Leah wasn’t sure what you meant entirely with We’ll talk then, but seeing as she was the one who stupidly broke up with you, the balls were entirely in your court. She was just happy you were still willing to talk to her after she called you at 2am to blabber her insomniac nonsense.
She wasn’t courageous enough to sit directly next to you at the dinner table, but rather took the seat next to Katie who sat in front of you. Courage wasn’t something Leah felt much lately, and it took seeing you again for her to admit that. Perhaps she was never brave, but you always made her feel like it anyway.
Everyone loved you, the movie star that graced her team’s humble dinner. She couldn’t help but watch in awe as you managed to charm the pants off of everyone at the table with your witty remarks and crazy anecdotes. You had a presence that made everyone want to be your friend; it made her uncharacteristically shy at trying to get you to notice her, that she resorted to watching you from afar. And the few times you would make eye-contact with her, she could only look away, bashful that she had been caught staring, as her courage dwindling with each gaze.
Later in the night, when everyone was scattered around the house chatting, she found you sitting alone on the patio. Upon closer look, she could make out a smaller, fluffy unit in the form of Myle, Beth and Viv’s little pup, prancing around in front of you, waiting for you to throw the tennis ball in your hand.
The constant sound of the girls’ conversations died down the moment she stepped out in the backyard, now lit with rows of incandescent lights overhead. Myle barked once with excitement as she spotted Leah approaching.
“I think she wants you to throw it,” you handed her the ball.
She grinned and took it. “No one beats Auntie Leah.”
Little Myle was quick to launch herself across the yard on a mission to retrieve her precious artifact.
“I wanted a dog really bad, the first year we started dating.” You said, pulling your knees to your chest as a gust of wind pulled at your hair. “I wanted a little corgi or an Italian greyhound. I spent hours looking for one to adopt and researched food, bills, insurance and stuff.”
“Why didn’t you get one?” Leah asked.
“We haven’t even moved in together at that point. Plus, I was still bouncing around, you knew that.”
She did. You were shooting a movie in Canada the few first months you and her started talking. Then, you were hopping around Spain, Portugal and various parts of the UK for another project. It wasn’t ideal, but still much closer than Canada. You would fly out every other weekend to watch her play, and she would do the same and visit you on-set, moving most things aside for a couple days with you.
“I would have loved a dog, I don’t know about you.”
“I’m sure you would have. You’d probably love it more than me,” you laughed.
“No,” Leah shook her head softly. “Never.”
Summer was approaching. She could feel it in the mildness despite the breeze. For a while, the soft murmur of the wind caressing the trees was all she could hear, and Myle’s occasional huff as she impatiently waited for the ball to be tossed again.
You both sat there watching her, fantasizing of a different life, a dream that never materialized, another fragment of memories again tainted by what-ifs. Leah bit her lip, trying to calm her spiraling thoughts. She felt her courage slipping away again.
“I’m sorry I called you the other day,” she pursed her lips. “That wasn’t very appropriate. I should have asked to talk to you properly.”
“Don’t worry. Wasn’t the worst thing you could’ve done.” She heard you chuckle next to her. “I’ve had some time to think about us. Admittedly, I didn’t want to think about it at all the first few months, but my therapist told me I had to face it one way or another.”
Leah held her breath. This was the part where you tell her that you’d moved on and that she should stop pestering you. One of her knees started bouncing up and down as she waited for you to talk.
“I had to face the fact that you’re the love of my life, and that night I met you and we danced to Hozier together—on the first night we met no less—was the second best night of my life. The best was when you told me you loved me. And the worst night of my life was when you broke up with me.”
“I’m sorry,” Leah whispered, feeling her throat tighten at your confession.
“No,” you said, moving closer. “I don’t regret it. I wasn’t ready when you proposed, and that was my truth. But Leah, I’d be lying if I said that I’d be okay with letting you go again.”
“I should’ve talked to you about marriage before I asked you to marry me. It wasn’t fair on you.” Leah offered you a tearful smile.
“I want to try again. I would do it again for you.” You reached out and wiped away the tears that had silently rolled down her cheeks as she listened to you.
“I thought I’d lost my chance,” she said. “I thought you’d moved on.”
“Oh, baby,” your thumb brushed over her cheek softly. “How could you think I’d ever be able to forget about you?”
She let out a soft cry of relief. Her heart was pounding in her chest, and there was only one thing she thought of doing.
So she leaned in, never minding her wet cheeks. The last thing she saw was you closing your eyes too.
“Oh—sorry!”
The two of you jumped apart at the voice behind you. Leah turned around with a visible scowl on her face, seeing Beth grimace sheepishly as she called for Myle.
“It’s her dinner time. Come, little one, you hungry?” Beth attempted to explain herself, as Myle sprinted inside. “Alright then. As you were.”
The moment the door closed, you burst into laughter, making her break out of her frown and smile with you. “I can’t believe that just happened,” you said, laughing into her shoulder.
“I’m going to kill her,” she shook her head and placed a chaste kiss on your cheek.
She didn’t mind it too much, because she got to take you home later and make up for the last two years until the early hours of the morning. You and her would laugh about it years later.
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THIRTEEN. About You.
Your lover never backed down from a challenge.
That was her way, and that was what made her one of the best in her sport, her unrelenting spirit.
Yet, her legs felt like they would turn to jelly the moment she laid her eyes on you at the end of the aisle, umber dirt covered in white rose petals. She felt like drowning in her emotions which had all risen to the surface, and the waves would only plunge her further into itself until she was completely immobilized by it. But she knew once she was able to pull herself together and walk to you on the other end of that path, heaven would be waiting for her.
The officiate went on and on about love, life, and promises of forever, but she had made that promise to you long before this day. She kissed you fervently the moment she was able to.
It only seemed fitting that the first chapter of your story began with a dance, and the most important one to also end with a dance. She offered you a hand, and you gladly took it, a childish giggle bubbling in your throat. The song you danced to the first night you met rang out in the venue, a soft and folksy tune the backdrop of your falling in love.
“It’s not so bad, is it?” She said with a teasing grin.
You gazed into her eyes like they held the world. You had no idea that her heart beat for you, how her soul yearned for yours, how her life will not forever be intertwined with yours.
You closed your eyes and hummed, swaying with her slowly, just like you’d practiced at home a couple of weeks ago, only that instead of the four walls of your shared home baring witness to this dance, it was all your friends and families.
Memories of the first night you met, and the one in which she promised you her heart bubbled as she saw the serene look in your face. You both have come so far.
You placed your head on her chest for all to see, the way you do when you are tired after long hours of work in front of the camera, when all you wanted was the magic and warmth of her company.
Leah smiled; she couldn’t stop smiling. She smiled and smiled until her cheeks ached, even beyond then, until forever.
“No,” you mumbled. “Not bad at all.”
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a/n: happy holidays to everyone :)
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skipper1331 · 6 months
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Silent and Loud // Vivianne Miedema
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a/n: based off this request. Hope you like it :)
Do you know the saying: opposites attract? Well, that was definitely true, at least for Viv and you. You couldn't be more different, the only known common thing was that you both played football.
Viv was shy and quiet while you were adventurous and loud.
She was tall, you were small.
She was a striker, you a defender.
scoring - assisting
Her love language was act of service while yours was words of affirmimation.
Yet you couldn‘t help but let the dutch steal your heart. There was a mutual pining between the two of you - everyone knew. You told her when she looked good or when she did something great, to which she always responded with a stuttery "thank you" whereas Viv made sure that you were okay or if you were missing something she would give it to you (a hair tie or anything) or made sure that you didn't become too careless/reckless.
Actually, you were made for each other, except that neither you nor Viv saw it, only everyone else.
-
"Viv! That was beautiful" you yelled as you jumped on her, celebrating her goal against Chelsea.
Even after the game, you couldn‘t shut up about that banger of a goal. It was almost criminal, that‘s how brilliant it was. Her cheeks flushed red, her fingers playing with jersey, getting very shy by all your praise.
-
You sat in the canteen next to Viv as Lia, Leah and others were also sitting at your table, enjoying their lunch before heading to the gym. Viv was in a conversation with Leah and Jen while Lia was telling you about her trip to her home country. The clumsy self you were you smacked your knife of the table with your elbow as you tried to adjust your sitting posture. Meanwhile Viv was still in her conversation but saw out of the corner of her eye that you leaned down to pick up your knife, not breaking the conversation her long arm streched over the table to the edge of it, her hand resting above it so you wouldn‘t hit your head and hurt yourself.
-
The dutch and you always had this connection, on and off pitch, it was special, it was magical. Despite the fact that you were complete opposites, you understood each other even without words. Sometimes a simple look was enough.
However, your confidence did not help you to have the guts to ask her out, there was no way she would like you (back). Most of the time you didn't even notice when Viv did something nice for you because you didn't have your eyes on the situation and the gestures that she consciously showed you, offering a hair tie, etc. was something any other player would have done too - which didn‘t mean you didn‘t appreciate it.
No one of the both of you intended to act on their feelings but when Leahs birthday rolled by and she invited you to her party every thing took a turn. You drowned shot after shot, dancing with Leah as Viv drank her cocktails with relish. Slowly but surely the alcohol hit her. If you can't taste the alcohol in fruity drinks, why stop drinking? you can drink so much of it until you get dizzy, then you'll notice the alcohol that was actually in it.
That‘s how Viv and you both ended up drunk at Leah‘s party. It wasn‘t until midnight though before you approached her, the pretty lady standing all by herself. "What‘s a pretty lady doing all alone?" you slurred, your body automatically leaning against hers, "Not alone anymore" the dutch replied, her accent thick. "I wanna kiss you" you said, the striker taking matters in her own hands as she pressed her lips against your own.
You didn‘t remember how you got to Vivs home, you didn‘t know how ended up naked in her bed, the only thing you knew was that it was - even drunk - the best night of your life.
Early in the morning, you slipped out of her bed, scrambling your stuff from the floor as the striker slept peacefully. You wanted to leave yet you couldn‘t, at least not without placing a glass of water and pain killers on her nightstand. Leaving the house, you looked at your phone, dozens of messages from the skipper, your best friend
Gooner4ever
Cbdiöq
Fnfejsb
Blub
Sksksk
Drunk texts from last night and new ones from an hour earlier
Where r u?
U good?
Call me
!!!
With a quick click on your phone, you called the english captain who answered immediately. "Hi" you said, not really knowing where to go, your car wasn‘t here. "Where are you?" the defender asked without even greeting you, "didn‘t see you going home"
"Yeah long story actually" you nervously, chuckled, "Can you pick me up?"
"Only If you buy me breakfast and there‘s a story time"
"Deal"
You sent her a text with your location, the blonde on her way.
Let's see what you had to say.
So while you remembered everything that happened between the dutch and you, she didn‘t remember anything.
She didn‘t remember kissing you,
she didn‘t remember cherishing you,
she didn’t remember telling you she loved you.
-
You hoped Viv would text you, say something to you about the night but she didn‘t. She acted like she normally would, heartbreak then struck when you overheard a conversation between her and Wally.
"Nope, don‘t remember anything besides the delicious cocktails"
The rest of the day your mood had been horrible. You were salty towards everyone, your game was shit but mostly you were mad at Viv and felt sorry for yourself. Actually it was kind of your own fault, how could you expect her to remember something when both of you were drunk? How could you allow yourself to get your hopes up?
Your weird behaviour didn‘t go unnoticed, the girls sharing looks behind your back. "Hey-" the dutchie greeted, the striker wanting to ask you if you‘re alright, your salty mood effecting her more than it should.
"Fuck off"
As soon as your best friend heard the words and seeing the anger radiating from your body, she grabbed your wrist pulling you away from the tall woman.
"What the fuck!" she spat. You slapped her hand away, "Do not touch me!" as your anger bubbled up. "Get your shit together" crumbling under the blonde‘s glare, her eyes softened as she saw you fighting the tears. All eyes were on you, something you didn‘t enjoy at all, you were humiliating yourself which wasn‘t your intention - you just didn‘t know how to control your emotions.
Looking at Leah, you asked for help, your body trembling as you couldn‘t open your mouth - your eyes said more than a thousand words. "Go" the defender gave a nod towards the changing rooms. You‘d never run so fast in your life. Everything was crushing down on you, you felt like you lifted all problems of everyone on your shoulders - the weight of the world.
Anger and sadness controlling your body and mind. you were no longer the ruler of yourself - you were someone in something of someone. Not yourself.
The locker room seemed small, so so small. Though it wasn‘t, it was like always - everthing was like usually besides that you slept with Viv, besides the fact that you remember everything and she nothing, besides the fact that you wanted Viv to remember.
Trying to calm down, you sat down, head in your hands while your breaths choked with sobs. Why did this have to happen? If only you hadn't drunk anything then you wouldn't be in this situation. "Fuck" with all your anger you smacked away the bottle which was standing next to you. The bottle flying through the room, breaking as it hit the wall.
"You shouldn’t do that" a voice startled you. The dutch. You were about to say something before she cut you off "don‘t tell me to fuck off" she stepped further in to the room, walking to you, to stand in front of you as she leaned down, her hands resting in your thighs, "don‘t ever tell me to fuck off again" she placed herself in front of you, her hands still on your legs as her thumb rubbed soothing circles on them, "do you want to tell me what‘s wrong?"
"No" you answered, eyes annoyed. To be honest, you wanted to yell at her, you wanted to say 'that‘s none of your fucking business' but you couldn‘t. It was Viv after all, the girl that couldn‘t kill a fly, the Taylor Swift lover, the girl you wanted to be yours.
"Okay" she simply replied, her hands leaving your body.
"Vivianne…" the stikers orbs looking at you in a way that left your heart fluttering, you could‘ve told her all your secrets and more. "stop looking at me like that" you breathed out, trying to contain your self-control. "Do you want me to go?"
"Yes"
Wordlessly, she stood up about follow your wishes. As she opened the door, you spoke again, "we had sex" you mumbled. She closed the door, still standing backwards to you, "what?"
"At Leahs party or rather after"
"It was you who placed the pain killers on the table"
It wasn‘t a question, it was a realization. As respond you hummed, looking at her back, hoping, wishing she would turn around.
"Is that why you‘re in a sour mood? Because we slept together?" Finally, she turned around, her heart beating in her chest. Did you think it was mistake?
"Yes and no? It‘s complicated!" your voice grew loud, the opposite to Viv whose voice was quiet, "explain it to me"
"Why wouldn’t you remember?" you cried, "you said all those nice things and now nothing!" walking around the room, your arms were wild.
"I told you i loved you" you stopped in your tracks - did she remember? "I told you, you were the prettiest girl with the prettiest eyes and prettiest smile. I told you i would treat you like the only girl in the world and love you forever" it was a rare sight to see her talk that much about her feelings - were those her feelings oder just the drunk slurs? "I will, If you let me" she stepped closer to you, coming to an end in front of you. "I meant what i said, even though i forgot it afterwards" her arms looped around your waist while yours rested on her biceps. Her eyes flicked from your own to your lips then back up.
Roles swapped - it was your turn to do something after she did the talking. You tilted your head up, standing on tip toes as you gently pressed your lips against the tall one‘s.
The kiss was short and gentle yet it told much more then words could. It was a confirmation - the silent act and the loud affirmimation meant the same.
The pining was mutual.
—————————
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gloomyhearts · 5 months
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Bundle of joy ~ Vivianne Miedema x f!Reader
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Her sweet wife's expecting and her teammates being just like family.
Tw: Mention of vomit and a swear..
Wrapped in your coat only your eyes and scrunched nose looking out you sat behind the bench of her team; Viv organized you a bandage for the seat. When the team walks back to the locker room Katie and some other wave at you and as Vivianne makes her way past you she stops at the railing. “Look at you all freezing up, just wearing gloves, what are you hoping for,” you laughed and she rolls her eyes. Her hand reaching for yours intertwining them, “You okay?” She knitted her brows. “you’re quite passive just some jogs.”
“Yeah, yeah, someone kicked me against my shine.”
“Nasty.”
“You can say that loud. Are you alright?” her eyes wandering from yours down to your abdomen.
“I’m fine, we’re fine” her lips curl up and her dimple visualizes on her cheek. “You’re rocking it Anna,” you squeeze her hand, the goner laughed, and you showed how you have her finger crossed, she gives you another radiant smile before disappearing into the dugout.
When the game ends her eyes search for you on your designed seat. “You good Miedema?” her thick accent filling the air.
“Yeah just looking..”
“For Y/N? I think she left ten minutes ago.” The woman takes off as the words left katies mouth.
Banging on the several doors in the restroom she hears heavy breathing behind the last one. “Schatje,” she raises her hand and knocks hesitantly on the door, “can you let me in?”
“It’s open,” you mumble, and she slowly pushes the door open. “It hit out of the blue, couldn’t even watch the end.”
Her hand rubs over your back, her other holding your hair back, “it’s alright, it wasn’t even important.”
“Every game is important for me, seemingly not for her.” Your head rests in your hand as you take deep breaths in.
“She cannot quite understand it,” Viv lets out a chuckle and takes your cheek in her hand.
“Don’t, I stink.”
“So, do I.”
“You don’t wanna kiss me with all the vomit.”
“I’d always kiss you but if you don’t feel like it it’s okay.” She rises to her feet holding out a hand for you, “you wanna come into the changing room and wait for me?”
“I don’t know I’m not sure if the nausea is gone,” you take her hand, and she helps you on your feet.
“Good, small steps, okay? So how are we?” leading you out of the stall and towards the sinks, getting some water in her hands she attaches it to your skin, a prickling feeling runs through your body. “You’re doing so well.”
“I’m just standing.”
“Yeah, and that’s enough,” she places her hands on your tummy which is hid in your coat. “We’re almost done, only a few weeks.” She pecks your cheek, then the other and at last your forehead. “I’m so proud of you.”
“Thank you, my love,” you bring your arms around your neck and snuggle into the crock of her neck, the sweaty smell almost calming you. “I’m ready let’s get this done.”
She guides you into the changing room where you’re meet with cheers and shouting from her mates, Beth almost jumping you to the ground, Viv could catch the two of you before worse could happen. “I can’t believe only a few weeks,” she squeaks still jumping up and down. Two strong arms sling around your body as Katie pulls you into her embrace “Can’t leave before aunty Katie said hello,” she lowers her head to the bump, “Yo hello bud in there, it’s your favourite don’t upset your mommies they’re doing their best and beyond. Can’t wait until you’re here.”
“Oh, girls you’re so sweet,” tears built up in your eyes and your bottom lip trembles they’re taking the cue and hold you in their embrace until Vivianne is ready to go home. “Okay guys see you tomorrow,” she waves for them, and you both step out.
The first days back home with your little bundle of joy was everything besides joy, screaming, crying, vomiting, pooping, people who say it’s easy peasy lemon squeezy should rod in hell. Hectic that was your new normal. Don’t get this wrong the birth of your baby girl was next to your wedding day the best day in your life, Heleen is a sweet girl and looks just like her mom but then she got this cold in the first days being home, she gets fuzzy and screams almost the whole day, neither of you could keep an eye shut, your hearts breaking at her being sick.
After this bumpy start the three of you fell perfect into the family routine and life. The only thing that was a topic that you discussed with your wife was football. She paused training with the girls the first month of Heleen’s life, she needed to get back on the pitch, stay in form, train for her to be part of the squad but that wasn’t as important to her than her family.
“Viv, it’s been a month you can’t stay home and workout here.”
“Why so?
“We don’t have the capacitate nor the girls to push you. You miss them. I know,” you caresses her cheek as you step closer to her in the rocking chair. “They need you. We got this; you still have half of the day with us my love.”
“But what if I don’t want to leave you?”
“I don’t want it either but there are some things we can’t change. We’ll come around as much as we can,” you peck her cheek and rest your head on hers as your hands hold her face. “You’re not a bad person, it’s your job.”
Marking her tenth month she was the first time in the stadium with you, the noise cancelling headphones on her head as she cradles in your arm eyes sparkling as she observes her surroundings. “Quite lovely innit Hel?” you kiss her occipital. “Look there’s mommy,” you point towards your wife who walks behind Beth onto the pitch, she squeaks and jumps in your lap. Heleen fell asleep around the twentieth minutes.
Viv scored twice that day and sent you a heart each time. Your daughter wakes before them and sees them as well, so you think cause she somewhat claps her small hands together, making you giggle. When the games ends you moved closer to the pitch with your daughter tight pressed into your body.
“Look who’s there,” you turn her in your grip, “your favourite aunty.” Katie sees you and runs over to you almost crashing into some other player.
“Look at you, all proud of aunty to win,” she raises her hands towards you, and you hand your daughter to the other woman.
“But careful Katie,” one brow raised, and your pointing finger dared on her.
“You know me.”
“Yeah, the biggest argument.”
“Let’s get you to your mommy,” she coos and walks over to Viv who was wrapped in a conversation with Beth and Caitlin.
“Oh, who’s there!”
“Our biggest fan!”
“Hartendief,” Viv tickles her side, and she wiggles in Katie’s grip and then she takes her off her aunties arm and into her body. “I scored for you have you seen that?” she whispers into her little ear, “I’m very happy you’re here.” She pecks her forehead and joins the conversation again, a smile plastered on her lips.
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woso-fan13 · 6 months
Text
Whumptober 2023: 1 (Arsenal)
No. 1: “But now this room is spinning while I’m trying just to fill in all the gaps.”
Safety Net | Swooning | “How many fingers am I holding up?”
You had laughed at the viral video of Sam hip checking a pitch invader, the move being such a classic Sam move that you didn’t even think about the possibility that something bad could have happened. It seemed so unlikely that someone would manage to make it past security, onto the pitch, and then over to the players just to harm one of them. 
But it happened. It was the 86th minute and you had just assisted Beth with an absolute banger. You were resting your hands on your head, not paying attention as you tried to force air back into your lungs before the game restarted. 
You weren’t paying attention to much of what was happening, only noticing when you heard multiple players- teammates and opponents alike- shouting your name in a panic. You looked up to see a very large- very scary- man charging towards you. You did what most teenage girls would do in your position and froze. 
He rams into you, knocking the two of you to the ground forcefully. His tackle was definitely more American football style than the type of football you usually played. 
You lay on the ground, this man who is easily a foot taller than you and double your weight crushing you. You can’t scream, can’t move, you’re just paralyzed with fear. 
In a recurring theme, Sam Kerr decides to handle the situation herself. You can finally take a breath- shallow and shuddering- as you watch your opponent pull this beast of a man off of you and stand over him. Your panicked eyes manage to find security, making their way over, but that’s the last thing you see before you’re enveloped into a hug and your vision is obscured by someone’s body. 
Viv. Viv was safe. So you latched on to Viv, your fingers gripping into her jersey as you shoved your face into her neck. You were spiraling and Viv was your safety net. 
The next little while is a blur, but you remember getting taken to the side of the pitch. When Viv tried to push you into someone else’s hold, you freaked out. Sobbing, you clung tighter to her, begging her not to leave. Leah was shocked that you wouldn’t move into her embrace, she knew that you trusted her. Trying to help you out, she unlatches your hands and tries to pull you into her arms. 
You become dead weight, sobs breaking through your hyperventilation. Jonas took pity on you, telling Viv she could be subbed out to stay with you. The woman quickly picked you up off the ground, carrying you back through the tunnel and into the locker room. 
She sat on the bench in front of your locker, cradling you in her lap. She rocked gently, speaking quietly to you in Dutch. You couldn’t understand her, but the process and the soothing tone calmed you and you were able to regain control of your breathing. Even as your sobs slowed and eventually stopped, Viv kept up the calming repetition. By the time you had finally calmed down enough that Viv was no longer afraid that you were going to make yourself sick, you were slumped into her, your exhaustion clear. 
Explaining everything to you before she makes any move, Viv manages to rinse you off in a shower and get you dressed in a sweatsuit. She has you sitting in between her legs as she brushes your hair out when the locker room door opens. 
It was quiet, something that was a rarity for the team. Everyone was in shock still, the previous events having shaken everyone up. You huddled closer to Viv as everyone entered. Realistically, you knew that they would never hurt you- the whole team had become older sisters to you. But still, the nagging thought in the back of your mind was that he might be there, coming for you. 
Everyone’s gaze was sympathetic as they looked at you, giving you a wide berth. You sat still for the next while, watching as everyone went to shower and put on clean clothes. No one approached you until Viv gestured to Leah and Beth to come over. The two women walked slowly, not wanting to spook you. Beth moves to sit next to Viv and Leah crouches in front of you. You can hear Viv whispering something to Beth, but you can’t make out what she’s saying. 
“Schatje,” Viv says, getting your attention, “I need to go shower. You’re going to stay right here with Beth and Leah, and I will be back as soon as I can.”
Partway through her sentence- when you realized that she would be leaving- you turned your body enough to cling to her again. You wiggle as close as you can to her, tears beginning to flow again. 
“I know it’s going to be hard, but you’re going to be okay. I just need 10 minutes, I can leave a timer on my phone. After that, you’re coming home with Beth and I and we can cuddle for the rest of the night,” Viv had hoped that the promise of a quick reunification and snuggles would be enough to convince you to let go. 
It wasn’t. You began sobbing harder, your cries becoming more frantic as you felt someone else rest a hand on your back. You squirmed, trying to get away from the other person while staying as close to Viv as you possibly could. Your panic only heightened when you heard Beth whisper, “just go,” to Viv. 
You began hyperventilating, pleading with Viv to stay between breaths. She couldn’t leave, you needed her. 
You felt her shift under you, and you felt another pair of arms wrap around you from the back. It was awkward, but you were transferred into Beth’s arms, your back to her chest. Her grip around you was tight, her hug keeping your arms down at your side. 
You’re fully panicking at this point, and it only increases when you see Viv stand up and walk away. As soon as the door shuts behind her, you become inconsolable. 
Leah resumes her position in front of you, very carefully moving her hands towards you. She makes sure that you see her, that you’re aware of her presence, before she puts her hands on either side of your face. Still, you flinch. 
She angles your head so that you’re looking directly at her, panic also evident in her eyes. This was a situation that no one had seen before, the team’s happy-go-lucky little sister was broken. 
“You’re alright, Love, you’re going to be okay. Viv’ll be back as soon as she can, and then we’ll get you home. No one in this room is going to let anything else happen to you, you’re safe,” Leah continues to speak calmly and reassuringly to you, still holding your head so you’re forced to look at her. 
Your eyes are wide, frantically searching the room for any possible threats. After about five minutes of Leah reassuring you and Beth holding you tightly, you finally make eye contact with Leah. Both women breathe a sigh of relief. It might be small, but it’s an improvement. 
A few minutes after that, your breathing becomes somewhat more controlled. You’re sobbing and your breath is hitching as you choke and cough around your sobs, trying to catch your breath. But you weren’t actively having a panic attack, which, again, is an improvement. 
Leah, feeling bold, moves one hand to smooth back your hair. When she feels you lean every so slightly into the touch, she continues stroking your hair. You were coming back to them, albeit slowly. 
You’re so distracted by looking at Leah as she guides you through your breathing that you don’t notice the door open. You’re not even aware as a figure approaches, fully trusting Leah and Beth to keep you safe. You only notice as this person sits beside you and rests a hand on your leg. 
Viv. Viv is safe. Again, you throw yourself at her, almost knocking her off the bench. The only difference this time is that your legs are still in Beth’s lap, and Leah still had a hand resting on the back of your head. 
Viv hugs you tightly. She would never admit it, but she hadn’t wanted to separate from you either. Realistically, she knew you were safe and that you would be okay with your teammates. But, still, a little part of her didn’t want to let go and give anything else the chance to hurt you. She could feel your hands gripping into her shirt, clutching like you were afraid she would disappear. She held you just as tightly. 
After you have calmed down from your reunification, Beth and Leah slowly remove themselves. The three women hear as you whimper slightly at the loss, Beth and Leah having to hold back smiles. Instead, they gather all of their belongings, shoving them into bags as quickly as they can. Beth grabs Viv’s bag and Leah grabs yours, and the two return to you in about a minute. 
It would take some time, but the three women would eventually coax you out to the car, Viv settling in the back seat with you. The other two sat in the front, almost constantly staring back at you in the mirror. 
The drive was short, and you pulled up to a familiar house. Viv steps out of the car, pulling you into her arms. The simple act of getting you away from the stadium had allowed you to calm considerably, and you were no longer crying. Your breathing was steady and slow, your eyes blinking heavily as both physical and emotional exhaustion consumed you. But you knew you were going to be taken inside and snuggled between all of the women. Everyone already knew that Leah would be staying, the woman already having invited herself over. And tomorrow, though you didn’t know it, the rest of the team would be showing up with breakfast. With your support system, you would be okay. 
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hi18364 · 29 days
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midfielders room
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“Jill, I really have to go or we will be found out.” “10 more minutes, then I'll let you go." I look at her eyes I say, "Okay." 
 
10 minutes later 
 
"Jill, I'm serious. I have to go." hugging her one last time then I open the door and step out I hear another door open up looking over and I look the person in the eye we both look shocked then the door down the hall open and out walks Beth mead 
 
She is coming out of Viv's room. I’m now standing in the hall with Beth Mead, my England teammate, and Ellie Carpenter. Beth goes to the elevator with her head down, and so does Ellie. I walk to the stairs and quickly go back to my room. getting in bed and go to sleep. 
 
Next day 
 
I'm sitting in the hall eating when Beth sits next to me "So tell me, y/n, why were you in a certain Dutch midfielder's room last night?" 
 
I looked around us, and the hole table was looking at us. "Ok, I'll tell you if you tell me why you came out of Viv's room." 
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stargirlsfc · 25 days
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viv trying to close beth's jacket lol
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dutchmeadema95 · 2 months
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Still love Jen for this 😅❤️
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wosounited · 10 months
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They don’t know (Leah Williamson x reader)
Ko-Fi: https://ko-fi.com/wosounited
BMAC: https://bmc.link/Wosounited
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Loving Leah was so easy, because being in love with the right person is meant to feel like that.
The only issue that you had in the relationship was Leah’s reluctance to tell anybody. Family, friends, teammates, not one of them knew about you.
You understood it to an extent the first few months but now, 2 years into the relationship, it got to you every now and then about how difficult it was you had still never been introduced to them as her girlfriend.
It was the root cause of most of your problems together, but after a blow up argument, you both would calm down and come back to eachother. Never losing the amount of love you shared.
You had actually met through your mutual friend, Kiera who played football with Leah on the England team. You were so good at hiding the relationship not even she had any suspicions that you were dating. It hurt you both whenever she would try and set either of you up with someone else which you both politely would decline.
“Hey baby?” Leah shouted as she came through the front door dropping her bags as soon as she shut it.
“In here” you shouted from the couch, banging on your laptop aggressively trying to get work finished.
“Hello” leah said gently placing a kiss on your forehead before heading out of the room again.
“Tea?” She asked on her way to the kitchen.
“Please” you shouted back.
Your apartment was small enough you could talk at a normal tone of voice from anywhere in it and the other person would hear.
“How was your day?” You asked Leah when you heard the kettle on.
“Good. Gym session today so tired now. How was yours?” She said with a hint of concentration in her voice, focusing on getting your tea just right.
“Fine just busy with work” you told her as you sent off an email.
She arrived into the sitting room with your tea and left it on the table infront of you sitting on the couch beside you and pressing play on the TV.
“Better now” you said.
“Hmm?” Leah asked with a frown on her face, cocking her head turning to look at you.
“My day” you said moving your laptop and reaching for her hand. “It’s better now”. Leah smiled and kissed you gently. Turning back to the tv.
“Fill me in so what’s happened in LA today” she pointed at the reality show you were watching that she always pretends not to be interested in.
You explain what had been going on in the show, and within minutes she was silently watching along, without blinking almost incase she missed something.
You finished up the last few bits you had for work and shut the laptop off for the day.
“What day is your match again this weekend baby?” You asked scrolling through your calendar.
“Saturday” she replied.
“Perfect. I’m sure I can pencil you in” you smirked at her. You had never missed one of her games.
“Oh how kind of you” she said pulling you into her side as you cuddled into her and continued watching the show.
“We are planning to go out afterwards though, so make sure to pack some nice clothes too” she said sipping out of her mug.
“Is your jersey not nice clothes?” You smirked at her as she laughed.
“Nice nice clothes” she smirked back.
“Will your teammates mind me being there?” You asked softly not wanting to almost bring up the topic.
“Of course not, they love you. Some of them probably as much as I do” she laughed.
You laughed for a second but blurted it out before you could stop yourself
“So why won’t you tell them that we’re together?”
“Y/n” she spoke softly. She hated this topic.
“It’s been two years Leah” your tone of voice a little more angry. You don’t know why you had to ruin this happy moment but you couldn’t help yourself.
“Everything comes so complicated when other people find out” she said.
“It only becomes complicated if we break up which we aren’t going to” you replied sternly.
She nodded indicating you were getting somewhere until she spoke again.
“I know but that’s always what I thought with Jordan”
“Jordan, Jordan, Jordan. Why do you always link it back to her? I understand the break up was difficult for you Leah. I really do. But do you not realise how stupid it is that you won’t tell people we are a couple because of how it went with your ex? I’m not Jordan, Leah, and I never will be. So if you want someone who will just sit placid and let you keep them a secret, it’s not going to be me” you were shouting at this stage
With that you got up and left the apartment, grabbing your keys and kicking your shoes on.
You pulled out of the driveway hearing Leah call your name from the door but you ignored it.
She walked back up to your apartment door and slammed it shut.
“Fuck” she screamed as she slid down the door holding her head in her knees and beginning to cry.
You on the other hand were replaying what you wished you said in the car, as if you hadn’t said enough already.
“Am I not good enough Leah?”
“Do you want to keep me hidden forever?”
“Maybe you were better off with Jordan”
You began slamming the wheel when your phone began to ring.
Kiera.
“Hey Ki, now is not a great time” you began saying trying to get rid of her as soon as possible to back to your ranting.
“Hey y/n/n sorry just quickly. Can you pick me up from the airport Saturday morning?” She asked quickly.
“You’re coming home?” You asked surprised.
“Surprise!” She shouted back. “Me and Lucy are coming over for a few days and are coming to see Leah’s game but you cannot tell her” she asked.
“Not a problem” you said back. “What time?” You asked your best friend.
“We arrive in at 10am in Stansted” she replied.
“Okay perfect. I’ll meet you there. Can’t wait to see you both” you said smiling now.
“You too! Bye”. She smiled as she hung up.
“Okay at least that’s a positive” you said to yourself taking the turn off to drive away from home a little longer.
You and Leah hadn’t talked much since the fight but when it got to Saturday morning you told her you needed to stop into the office before her match and you would see her after her game.
She pouted, but didn’t argue. You caved slightly and kissed her before you left, knowing she’d struggle in her game if you were still fighting.
“I love you” you said while taking a hold of her hand.
“I love you more” she wrapped her arms around your waist and hugged you tightly. “I promise, I’m going to work on it” she offered a solution to the problem.
You nodded and placed another kiss on her lips before running off to collect Kiera and Lucy.
Although, being best friends with Kiera, you got on incredibly well with her girlfriend Lucy, who was also Leah’s teammate.
“Luce!” You shouted when you saw her.
“Y/n/n” she shouted back abandoning the suitcases and running to jump into your arms.
“Easy Lucy you will kill her” Kiera shouted trying grab all the suitcases now on the floor. The same floor Lucy had just knocked you down on before picking you back up again.
“Hey Ki” you said hugging her as she helped you too her feet.
“Hey darling” she hugged you back.
“So will we swing by yours drop the bags and go?” Kiera asked.
Fuck. They don’t know you and Leah live together. But you couldn’t hesitate because that would be weird.
“100%” you replied checking your watch hoping Leah was going to be early for once in her life and be gone by the time you were back.
Lucy grabbed the suitcases off Kiera again and chatted with you the whole way to the car.
She told you about a place that had opened up beside them in Barcelona that sold the best coffee, apart from Jill’s. She promised the next time you were over she’d take you there.
When you got back in the car and headed for home you kept checking your watch. Lucy didn’t notice as she was distracted talking to you but Kiera did.
“Everything alright y/n?” Kiera asked interrupting Lucy in the middle of showing you pictures of Nala, that you couldn’t look at anyway between checking your watch and the road.
“What? Yeah all good” you replied gesturing Lucy to carry on before Kiera could ask you anything else.
When you arrived home, you scanned for Leah’s car which you couldn’t find so you took a breath of relief when you ushered the girls out of the car and into the apartment. Only to be met by your beautiful blonde girlfriend in her Arsenal suit on the other side.
“Hey bab- Ki” she screamed loudly, pulling her best friend into a hug.
“What are you doing here? Damn we wanted to surprise you” Lucy said pulling Leah in for a hug, less violently than you got.
“I live here” Leah pointed out puzzled they asked, almost forgetting who stood beside her.
“With y/n?” Lucy asked eyeing both of you.
Fuck.
“Oh yeah. I moved in when me and Jordan broke up” Leah said.
“So you’ve been living together for what like 2 and a half years? And you never thought to mention?” Kiera asked.
Oh god if they were angry at this part, how would they feel when they found out we’d been together for 2 of those years.
“No way. I definitely told you” Leah laughed it off making Kiera shake her head smirking.
“Are you coming then?” Leah asked the three of you.
“I’ll drive” you replied.
“Wait both of you grab clothes for later” Leah told them as they went into the spare room to get their stuff.
“Why is this room empty?” Kiera shouted.
Leah raised her eyebrows at you.
“Come up with something” she whispered.
“Uh I was painting” you said as Leah facepalmed and shook her head.
“Well, y/n, you done a shit job” Lucy shouted back exiting the room laughing as Kiera followed her out taking a peek into what she thought was just Leah’s room.
“Come on we’re late” Leah said gesturing them out the door.
They were a few steps ahead when you whispered to Leah.
“I’m sorry I thought you were gone”
“It’s okay, don’t worry. They don’t suspect a thing” she wrapped her pinky finger around yours.
“Definitely fucking” Lucy whispered to Kiera who nodded in agreement.
“Yep” she replied.
The game finished 2-0 to Arsenal and thank god because you hated nights out when they didn’t win. It was messier than the happy drunks they were when they won.
You got on well with Leah’s teammates. After an awkward encounter with Caitlin one evening trying to flirt with you, you opted to steer clear and speak to the ones you knew would cause Leah’s head not to explode again.
This is why most of your nights out were spent with Beth, Frida, Jen and Viv. All of who were in happy relationships.
“Can I get you a drink?” Jen asked you as you sat talking to her girlfriend Amber.
“Who are you talking to?” Amber asked smirking.
“Y/n obviously, why who are you?” she smirked back
“Seriously, though. Drinks?” She asked again.
“The usual babe” Amber replied.
“G&T please” you said.
“On it” she smiled as she walked away.
You were interrupted when a very drunk Leah approached you.
“Dance with me. Love Island is shit” Leah said sticking the finger up at Amber and grabbing your hand.
“So is your defending” Amber jabbed back.
Jen arrived back with your drinks dishing them out.
“Jen, Leah’s bullying me again” Amber pouted at her girlfriend.
Jen turned to Leah and faked a punch. As she raised her hand, you stood infront of Leah. Instinct.
“Ohh protective” Viv joked from her seat.
You laughed but Leah pulled you away to the dance floor. You danced a little too close together but she was too caught up to notice.
“Definitely fucking” Amber said as Beth, Jen and Viv at all agreed by nodding. All eyes glued on the two of you.
“I told Kiera” Leah whispered in your ear.
“You did?” You almost squealed.
She nodded her head and went back to dancing with you.
It was 3am when you, Leah, Lucy and Kiera piled into a taxi. Abandoning your car at the Arsenal ground vowing to collect it tomorrow.
The three of them slumped on the couch when you got home as you went to the kitchen to get a glass of water, bringing one back for Leah too.
“God my head” you said holding it waiting for your girlfriend to kiss it but it never came.
“I’m gonna head to bed” you told them as Kiera and Lucy wished you a goodnight.
“Don’t be long” you said to Leah and placed a kiss on her cheek.
You walked out of the room, not noticing the looks you were currently getting from Kiera.
“Where’s my kiss?” Lucy shouted but Kiera elbowed her to shut up.
“Leah what’s going on” Kiera asked from the other couch. Leah stayed looking at the floor fiddling with the glass in her hand.
“Nothing” she replied, refusing to make eye contact.
“She just kissed you mate” Lucy piped in but Kiera elbowed her again.
“Leah” Kiera said getting up and taking her best friends hand dragging her into the kitchen.
“What’s going on?” Kiera asked.
This was her moment to tell Kiera what was really going on. But she couldn’t.
She had lied to you in the nightclub. Caught up in the moment.
“If you’re fucking her just say it” Kiera snapped.
“It’s just sex but she’s seeing someone else”
What the fuck?
“What?” Kiera asked.
“Yeah she has a boyfriend” Leah said digging herself in further.
“A boyfriend? When has y/n ever had a boyfriend?” Kiera asked confused.
“Oh yeah eh a good while now. But we’ve just slept together a few times it’s nothing” Leah looked to the floor again.
“Is there feelings?” Kiera asked and Leah shook her head forcing a laugh.
“Nah” she lied again.
“You’ve got to end that Lee you can’t come in between that” Kiera told her.
She shook her head.
That night Kiera and Leah slept in the spare room together, and Lucy hopped in with you.
Thinking it was Leah, you immediately swung your leg over her in your sleepy haze and cuddled into her side.
Even if you were fully aware of what you were doing Kiera or Leah wouldn’t care. They both understood you loved them.
“Definitely fucking” Lucy whispered before heading off to sleep.
Part 2 🔜
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onna0 · 5 months
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why am i crying 😭
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meademalove · 22 hours
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Everytime I see this clip I think that Beth has so much to say but doesn't comment because of the cameras, especially something along the lines, 'yeah you'll get a headache now and it'll be my problem'. Beth's head shake and slight eye roll at the end, and Viv's shy guilty smile - she knows she's in trouble. 🥰
The sarcastic 'brilliant' and the music all adds up too. 😅
They're so married. ❤️
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kamwilliamsonn · 11 months
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pretty - Vivianne Miedema
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request : here
of which Viv gets a little too drunk at one of Katie's parties
"y/n come join us, please!" Leah pouts at you, asking you to come and join with them.
"I think I should probably stay sober, mate, somebody has gotta look after you lot." You smiled at her, laughing as she slouches herself against you.
She drunkenly points across the room to wear your favourite Dutchie stood, clearly out of her mind. "Think she might need it more than the rest of us."
The blonde was staring over to you and Leah, a small pout on her face, one arm holding a glass that she's drinking far too quickly, while the other is holding onto the table to keep her standing.
You laughed softly and pulled Leah off of you, passing her over to Jen instead, and made your way over to Viv.
She hadn't even noticed you make your way over until you had plucked the glass from her hand.
"Hey, pretty, let's get you home, ey?" You mumbled softly, putting your arm around her waist.
Her head instantly leans down onto your shoulder - it was a struggle because she was a little taller than you - and nods tiredly. "y/n/n, I'm sleepy." She mutters out and you smile down at her.
"Hey, everyone! I'm gonna take Viv home, does anybody else want a lift?" Beth instantly took the invite and headed towards your car, climbing in the back seat while you help Viv into the front.
Ever the animated drunk, Beth talks to you the whole way to her house, only having her seatbelt on because you had forced her to.
Viv, on the other hand, sat quietly in the front seat - a comfort-loving drunk - her hand was resting on your knee, as she stared at you driving, her eyes flickered all over you, ignoring every word that Beth said.
Beth was the first to be dropped off, you walk her up to her door, your eyes flicking to Viv in the car, making sure that she didn't do anything dumb.
You grab her keys from her hands for her and unlock the door, watching as she collapsed onto the sofa and falls asleep instantly.
You grab two aspirin from your bag and grab her a bottle of water, leaving them on the coffee table next to her.
"Goodnight, Beffy." You mumble softly before leaving the house, shutting the door behind you and making sure it locks.
When you get back to the car, Viv is practically crying in her seat.
You instantly sit down and shut the door. "Hey, what's wrong?" You ask her, only to be met with silence. "Vivianne." You warn her softly, letting her know she should answer.
She looks over to you, and the pout and tears almost make you start crying yourself. "I thought you forgot about me." She mumbles.
You lean over and give her a soft kiss on her forehead. "I would never."
That makes the tears stop, her hand instantly goes back to your knee, drumming a little beat as you pull your seatbelt on and start the car once more.
Once you arrive at her house, you ask her for your keys, and see the tears form once more. "I left them inside. And Beth is the only person with a spare key."
"That's okay. It's okay, don't cry. You can crash at mine and we'll get your key from Beth in the morning, how does that sound?"
The blonde nods softly, a pout still on her face as you start the car again.
The moment you pull up at your house, you shut the car off completely, pulling your keys out.
You get out of your side and walk around to Viv's side. You unlock the door and help her out, wrapping your arm around her waist once more.
Her head drops into the crook of your neck and in her drunken state she starts to press soft kisses.
Your breath hitches softly as you try and ignore it, walking her up your steps, unlocking your door with your left hand - it wasn't easy.
You walked her up to your bedroom - you'd use the guest, your bed was nicer and you didn't want Viv to be uncomfortable - and found a pair of jogging bottoms and a t-shirt that would fit her before placing them on your bed.
"I'm gonna grab myself some clothes and go get changed in the guest room, then, I will bring you some aspirin and some water, and you will go to sleep. Understand?"
"Can't you stay with me?"
"Do you really want me to?"
"Yes. Really." She nods energetically. "You're pretty, I wanna share the bed with a pretty girl."
"You're so drunk."
You still ended up getting changed in the other room, and she got changed in yours, you went to bed with her in your arms.
And the next morning, even with your hair a mess, and a little dribble dripping down your chin, she still thought you were the most gorgeous girl in the world.
And even with a pounding headache she made sure to tell you. Her head once more resting in the crook of your neck as she mumbled to you,
just how pretty you were.
What do you think? I feel like the writing sucks a little, and it could have been written better, but I adore the idea so- yay :)
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sleepdepriveddee · 5 months
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Anna Margaretha Marina Astrid 'Vivianne' Miedema is back! She's back! And she can smile!
🥹❤️‍🩹🐐
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skipper1331 · 6 months
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One Day // Vivianne Miedema
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a/n: based off this and this request - thought i could combine them.
"Good morning, my love" you whispered as your alarm ringed, the dutch never one to wake up by just an alarm. "We have to get up" your pressed a gentle kiss to her cheek, knowing she loved it when she woke up to kisses, "No" said person grumbled while she tightened her arms around you, pulling you closer in her embrace. "We have to" you entangled your body out of her arms, one leg already out of bed as Viv suddenly sat up, "Need kissies" she pulled you back in, your legs resting at either side of her waist, "so needy" you giggled before you littered pecks all over her face, her nose scrunching in responds.
"Now i‘m ready to start the day!"
-
"Liefje" the tall woman called as you were in bathroom, ready to start your morning routine, "what do want for breakfast?" her head chipped in, her eyes roaming over your body as you were in nothing but her too big clothes. A slight blush covered cheeks while her heart fluttered, you never failed to amaze her by you just being you. "Smoothie? Maybe?"
"Smoothie it is" the striker left you alone, making her way down to the kitchen as you continued or rather started your routine. The smoothie was on the counter, already in a cup (your favorite) as you patted to the kitchen, Viv nowhere to be seen. Sipping from the straw, the delicious taste of your favorite fruits hit your mouth - Viv made the best smoothies. "Hm, you like it?" said person asked. "Shit!" you jumped, hand over your chest as you tried to control your breathing, "babyyy" you whined, "I almost dropped my smoothie" grumbling at her, the tall woman poked your cheeks, making you laugh, "i love your laughter" she muttered, eyes full of love as her arms looped around your midsection, "the smoothie?"
"was perfect" you gave her a peck or two, "like you" pecking all over her face. The dutch giggled, her nose scrunching as a big smile broke out on her face.
"Ik houd van jou"
"I love you too"
-
"Liefje, hurry up!" Viv yelled as she stood at the front door, your kit bag as well as her own in her hand. "I can‘t find my bag" your eyes scanned through your bedroom, then the living room - every room. Walking up to Viv you gave up, you had no idea where your bag was, the striker chuckled at your helpless expression. You gave her a glare, how can this be funny to her? With an ease she lifted your bag, waving it in front of your eyes. In reaction you snatched it away, "you let me search for it for 15 minutes, knowing you had it in your hand!" you growled, frowning like a child.
"You’re cute" the dutchie slung her arm around your shoulder as she pressed a kiss to your head, "now let‘s go"
Viv took a seat in the drivers seat while you sat next to her, even though you had the passenger princess privileges Taylor Swift music was playing the whole time on the way to the stadium. You just had to look at the shy girl and you would crumble and do anything for her. So meanwhile she sang to herself yet audible for you (something only you had the privilege to hear) her hand was resting on the bare skin of your thigh, absently drawing circles on it.
-
Derby day.
The blues.
Always a strong opponent.
The stands were filled with red and blue, fans were singing chants, both teams in the tunnel. Viv was behind you, you could feel her eyes on you, like always. Every match the dutch would stand behind you, it calmed her. Her eyes would roam over your figure, always stopping at your jersey. One day her surname will be on the back of it. That was a promise. A promise she made ages ago.
At half time the score was 1-1. Sam Kerr scoring the opening goal while Kim Little scored the penatly. The game was rough, Emma Hayes looked like she was about kill someone and a certain defender was targeting you, Maren Mjelde. Each time you had the ball you hadn‘t had it for long - your body hitting the grass every time. A little push or her leg in your way would cause you to fall. For sure, your body will have bruises tomorrow. Viv was the first by your side, asking If you‘re okay or what hurts. Slowly but surely the dutch was getting angry, how could Mjelde get away with it? No card - no foul. After the 8th time of your body hitting the ground Viv had enough - you didn‘t get up. Lia at your side while Viv was by the Chelsea defender shoving her as she cursed in her mother tongue. Most of the time, the tall woman was calm and collected but not when it came to you. Her patience was very short when it came to you.
Katie had her arms around the dutch trying to pull her away while Kim stood in front of her, pushing her away. Captain duties. As the ref showed Viv a yellow card, the same card Maren Mjelde finally got, Viv was by your side. Her hand wiped the sweaty hair out of your face while the medics examined your ankle, "is it bad?" you whispered, tears running down your cheeks. "I don‘t know, my girl"
Your ankle hurt and you were subbed off but in a few days, everything would be fine. With an ice pack around your ankle you watched the rest of the game, your lover not scoring once but twice. Her reply to your substitution - her statement: do not mess with her girl.
When the final whistle blew, the dutch shook every opponents hand, Maren being the last, "I‘m sorry" she apologized, "i didn‘t mean to shove you" It was simply out of the situation - out of her emotional state. She couldn’t harm a fly, even If she tried. At the end of the day it was just an intense game where no one had any evil intention.
It was important for Vivianne to have apologized. It wasn't like her not to.
Viv was one of the best strikers in the world but she also had her values ​​and morals. If things got more intense on the field, it was important for her to clear the air after.
As it should be.
At the end of the day, every player was only human.
-
You were glad when the match was finally called to an end, ready to go home with your lover. Both of you decided to shower at home, it was already in the evening - you wouldn‘t leave your home anymore. Again the striker behind the steering wheel, this time with her hand in yours as she drove the two of you home. At a red light, she occasionally would press a kiss to your lips as she had not felt them against her own the whole time. Even though every one knew you were a couple, you would act professionally, only in private showing the lovey-dovey side you shared. Yet there were always loving glances and sneaky touches, you couldn't do it completely without - the love you shared was way to powerful and present to hide it.
The tall woman carried your bag inside as you patted after her, your ankle still covered in ice. "Take out, baby?" you asked while you snuggled your arms around her from behind - the dutch being too tall for you to rest your head on her shoulder "sure, your usual?" she asked turning around, her arms going around your shoulders as she craned her neck down, pressing a loving kiss to your head. In agreement you hummed in to her chest, tightening your grip around the striker. "Missed you" you mumbled as an exhausted sigh left your throat. Viv squeezed you, knowing what you meant.
You had missed her kisses.
You had missed her hugs.
You had missed her shy smile and blushing cheeks.
You had missed her.
"Lets take a shower" the taller girl lifted you up, your legs going around her waist as she carried you to the bathroom. She placed you on the counter, "is it okay if i take your clothes off?" she asked. In respond you muttered a tired yes - the dutch made sure everything she did was with consent. She took your shirt off, she asked If it was okay. She took your pants off, she asked If it was okay. That just who she was.
After showering and dressed up in some comfy clothes, the two of you found yourselves sitting on the couch. You had your back leaned against Vivs front as your limbs were tangled together. With your hair and body freshly washed you felt clean again, the striker behind you, ordering the take out while you searched for a series. As you decided which series you wanted to watched you nestled back in Vivs embrace as she silently massaged your shoulders. "Thank you, baby" you muttered contently, eyes closed as the voice of Phil Dunphy filled the background noices. Though, the dutch was sitting behind you, you knew that her cheeks were covered in a blush, her shy smile across her face. No matter how long the two of you had been a couple If you called her any kind of pet name, the girl would squeal inside, skin tingle, heart race, love burst.
When the food arrived, both of you took a seat at the kitchen table and while you enjoyed your meals, you talked about everything and nothing, loving glances and touches being shared.
-
Back on the couch, your head rested in the crook of her neck, legs tangled as her fingers combed through your hair in a manner to help you fall asleep. Pressing featherlight kisses to her neck, you mumbled inaudible words - the taller girl pulling you close(r). The series in the background long forgotten as your breathing evened out, soft snores hitting Vivs neck. Vivianne continued to watch the episode of modern family before she carried you to bed. She tugged you under the blanket like a burrito, herself laying next to you as she pulled you in her arms - she could only sleep with you in her touch, knowing you were safe.
"Good night, liefje, Ik houd van jou" she mumbled, pressing a long and final kiss for the day to your head before she settled in to the pillow. It didn‘t take long for the striker to fall asleep - dreaming about you.
Mrs. Miedema, one day.
———————
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woso-fan13 · 4 months
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Comfortember 2023: 24 (Arsenal)
24. Blankets 
You slowly become aware of your surroundings, but your eyes feel too heavy to open. You’re so warm, nestled snugly between two bodies. The television in the background is playing quietly, softly illuminating the room. Life is so good. 
You make a small noise as your hand reaches out, clearly searching for something. You feel the bodies around you vibrate as your mums laugh. You grunt in reply, unamused. 
“Here, bean,” Mummy says quietly as she presses the needed object into your fist, “here’s blankie.”
Satisfied, you murmur sounds that could be interpreted as a thank you to Beth, clenching your fist around the fabric and pressing it into your face. 
You feel hands wrapping around your waist, pulling you up. You go limply, body and mind both still sleepy. You’re moved to be cradled, resting against a firm chest. It’s familiar, you know it’s Mama’s. 
Viv sways gently with your tiny form cradled against her, soaking in the cuddles. She uses one finger to brush the small strands of hair back off your face before tracing your features. She runs her finger over the tiny furrow in your tiny brow, watching as you relax even further. She can’t resist caressing your pouty, sleepy lips with her thumb, watching as you try to latch on and suckle. It causes both women to chuckle. 
Mummy snags a spare dummy from the coffee table, slipping it in between your lips. You pause for only a moment before resuming the suckling pattern you had started on Mama’s finger. 
Your blankie is still held tightly in your fist as another warm blanket was tucked around your body. Life is so so good. 
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