Friendly daily reminder to live and let love, and don't tag your hate.

Last , Last Thoughts on That Issue/ Why I'm just Disappointed in Both Sides

Disclaimer before I get stared: yup, I’m going back to THAT again. If you just want to see art on the Glitchtale tag and are sick and tired of this issue like I am, sorry for making you scroll a bit more so you don’t have to see this. I probably should just let this die because we’re pretty much off this, but I still see the occasional comment on twitch or on here, so I need to get this off of my chest. I’m going to try to not take a side, but if you’ve seen my other posts, you know I do believe that word could be seen as offensive, though not in context, but that it should be treated more carefully, and that I also do not hold much Ill will towards Cami (still slightly peeved) I will also have a section of this where I talk about not liking the use of SJW or triggered. But again, I’ll try being non-partisan here besides that.

I’m disappointed in both sides here. For people who found the use of the r-word offensive or troublesome, I’m disappointed in the lack of trying to peacefully reach out to Cami. It was clear she meant not to insult anyone mentally disabled and that she had no idea the word had a negative connotation in some parts of the world. Now, that wasn’t entirely clear when she first said the word and people might not know the word had no offensive connotation in Chile, but still, anyone who knows it as a slur should also know that some people use it like a standard Insult to mean idiot (such as younger kids do in America) because they are not aware of what it’s been turned to, and that the user is not trying to insinuate someone is a lesser being because they were born with a mental disability. So it was not right to say things like Cami was ableist (someone who hates the disabled) or that she was trying to be rude to anyone other than that kid. It also doesn’t help to get super angry and toss out other swear words like “fuck” or “bitch” left and right because it makes you harder to take seriously when you swear like a sailor while arguing with someone, and they are less likely to understand or want to compromise with you when you insult them. And finally, it doesn’t help to either a) try to act surperior or Talk down someone who you think is being a jerk because it makes you look egotistical, and b) don’t specifically insult Cami’s friends (however, overall being annoyed with people supporting Cami is understandable, which is what my next thing is about). Overall, if you act to rudely or intensely in trying to make your point or change someone’s mind, you only guarantee that people are less likely to agree with you, which means you are shorting your argument in the foot. And as someone who was making that argument, I’m really freaking angry at the people who made it impossible for the argument to go anywhere pleasant, and I feel sorry for anyone else who wanted to be civil while still disagreeing. While civility may not have changed anyone’s mind, it would have been better than what did happen, because now Cami’s probably never going to understand or empathize with people who don’t like the word.

Now, here’s my other point. I feel like Cami and some of her supporters got kind of–and yes, I will use this word despite the fact that it seems to piss off people on here–rude. Rude for understandable reasons, but still rude. It feels like, because There were people who were being equally rude at a stressful time in Cami’s life, she was too angry to be willing to compromise or be understanding. I just am bothered by the fact that everyone seemed to say stuff along the lines of “the word isn’t offensive at all to me/ check the context/ check the definition” and write it off there. And that’s what bothers me. People didn’t seem willing to understand that word really was seen as offensive to a decent amount of people. It seemed like Cami and a lot of her supporters felt that, if they couldn’t see offense in it, no one had a reason to get offended. And it’s fine that they Don’t get offended or see any problem with the word. But it would have been nice to see something like “okay, I still don’t think the word is offensive, but I understand why people are bothered by seeing it.” Instead, it felt like anyone bothered by that word was being treated like a baby who was calling Cami Hitler and saying the kid was better than her. So that led to some people immaturely using the word when being asked to stop, which feels like the verbal equivalent of a baby tossing their peas in their parent’s face when asked to eat them in terms of behavior. (I am not referring to Cami herself using it more because I get she only used it once, I’m referring to the fact that I saw other people saying that as if it made them comedic geniuses) there was also a few people saying stuff like “stupid Americans trying to make the world about them.” Forcing you to adopt the death penalty, use English, eat my food, or use the imperial system of measurement would be arrogantly forcing my culture on yours. Getting offended by something seen as an offensive word in my country which I have been taught not to use is the result of naturally carrying my national baggage onto an international stage. I’m not saying that means the American view that r-word is offensive is right, but if Cami makes the honest mistake of assuming the rest of the world doesn’t find it offensive, why can’t we make the honest mistake of assuming the rest of the world does find it offensive? Heck, asking “why is it like that in this country” instead of saying “this country is stupid then, because I know the way I grew up with is right” would allow for some discussion that lets us open to each other and increase our worldview. It would help you understand we don't just choose to get offended because we want to. Heck, maybe you have actually read about how the word became a slur and still think we're stupid. Fine. But at least don't write it off as us having no reason .

And here’s where I get to the part that I do become partisan. Why the hell is anyone who gets offended even when they aren’t personally insulted deemed an SJW these days? What the hell is wrong with worrying about someone else? I guess people would say “if they aren’t part of that group, they are misrepresenting it by trying to talk for them. Heck, I am a part of this group and I’m not insulted.” Five things: 1) what about people who actually, legitimately, understand the issue and want to defend that group. 2) how does not being part of that group stop me from having an opinion? 3) is it wrong of me to defend other people (and before you say “I could defend wrong” reread 1) 4) great if you aren’t insulted, but there are others who will be insulted. 5) defending a group does not mean you want attention, you can legitimately have feelings on an issue. This isn’t just applying to what happened with Cami. This is almost any freaking time I see someone use SJW, and I just happen to be here while I’m venting. SJW should be used for someone who is taking an issue where nobody has complained ever anywhere, making it an issue, and bringing nothing to back up their argument. That’s someone who you can be legitimately pissed off at because they want to make themselves a hero out of something truly meaningless to anyone.

Oh, also, for People who make the “Triggered” jokes. You know, that word refers to people who would actually have PTSD if they saw something that reminded them of an uncomfortable experience, like a soldier with PTSD hearing a gun or bomb. I get that a small number of people might appear to act that extremely. But getting offended by a word is not the same as that 99% of the time. And generally those people who get offended actually have a reason that it might help you listen to, instead of saying “lol, that person is upset, so I’ll make fun of them by doing something I know bothers them.”

Still I understand that she was angry, and already at a stressful time, and that there were people who were being too rude in their responses to her that word. They did not have the right to insult her like they did or act like surperior dickheads. And I understand why, emotionally, she would be unwilling to be less angry in her responses if a decent amount of the opposition wasn’t civil to begin with. And I get that I’m probably generalizing her reaction and I’m mistakenly assuming she didn’t literally mean people were calling her hitler. I was just bothered that some of her and her defenders counter responses seemed pretty rude and Inconsiderate. And that people who got angry at her were also inconsiderate by insulting her so rudely or acting like their position made them morally superior. It was stupid off them, and what lead to Cami insulting them in the first place.

And I don’t mean to imply Cami was weak for having an emotional response. Emotions are part of who we are. Obviously not everyone will be able to stay calm and fine at all times. Heck, I have one of the shortest fuses on the planet. I brought up emotions because I think people who chose to insult Cami were at fault for why she would be somewhat hostile.

TL;DR I feel like both sides here were not professional in how the r-word issue went down. I am Not expecting pure civility or happiness on the internet, and I understand not all arguments can be handled calmly and orderly, or that polite argument leaves everybody satisfied. I’m just disappointed because we could have still had that debate without drama or angriness, Even if we ended upcoming to the same conclusion as we did a few days ago. And sorry for anybody I might have thrown under the bus with a generalization, or if I assumed to much of the meaning behind what someone said. Also sorry if I ended up using loaded language in my argument or subconsciously made it anti-r-word usage despite trying to remain neutral.

Finally sorry for bringing this up if it starts the whole mess over again. If it happens, put the blame on me and my inability to not let shit die.