Kim Dokja & You, The Reader: A 51% Kim Dokja Character Analysis
Disclaimer: this is mainly an analysis of my own personal feelings while reading the epilogue, although I’m sure this is also applicable for other ORV fans too.
51% KDJ is our narrator. It’s the part of KDJ that loves Ways of Survival, and KDJ first and foremost is a reader to us; that’s how he introduces himself, after all, in the very beginning of ORV. That’s the whole premise, even. One man manages to successfully navigate the apocalypse all because he’s read a book about it. 51 feels genuine and authentic to us in a way that the third-person narrator 49% KDJ, who has lost all interest in TWSA, doesn’t. 49, in comparison, feels like a pale facsimile. 49 can’t be the actual Kim Dokja, because the Kim Dokja we know is on the subway narrating the book to us.
And so as the reader, when 51 is stuck on the subway, it feels like the real KDJ has been left behind. 49 is just an avatar, after all. The actual KDJ isn’t there to experience life after the scenarios with his companions, and that’s why it’s so heartbreaking. Surely, after everything he’s gone through, doesn’t KDJ deserve to be happy?
Here’s the thing: even before falling into the coma, 49 being able to spend time with KimCom still doesn’t feel like a happy ending. There’s a falseness to it; it doesn’t sit right. During the picnic, Yoo Sangah has a conversation with Han Sooyoung; she asks HSY if she really thinks that the other companions haven’t noticed that something is off about Dokja. But then she continues:
“That person is also Dokja-ssi. Doesn’t matter how much percentage he is made out of, there’s no doubt that he is Dokja-ssi. Dokja-ssi who journeyed together with us.”
Yoo Sangah asked her. “Is there any meaning in deciphering which one is really him?”
(Chapter 521)
This raises the following question: who really is Kim Dokja? YSA makes a good point here; 49 has all the important memories that KDJ shared with them, and it’s impossible to truly know 100% of a person, so isn’t it enough that they still have the 49% that matters?
But as a reader, you’re left feeling unsatisfied like HSY because you know that the 49% avatar isn’t really him. Of course it isn’t enough. The 49% of him that’s there isn’t the same KDJ that we know; that one is stuck on the subway.
But that’s not quite right either. Because the KDJ on the subway, as genuine as he feels, is still only 51% of him. We as the readers are like YSA in that respect; we can’t truly know all of KDJ either. KDJ the first-person narrator is different from KDJ the companion, and as the reader, there’s this fundamental distance between our world and his that we’ll never be able to comprehend.
So you’re left looking at 51 thinking, “This is the one that matters! Come get him off the subway!” If you’re me, you might even be looking at YSA thinking, “How can you be happy like this?! This isn’t a happy ending!”
But in reality, you’ve fallen into the same trap. The only part of KDJ’s story you can really know is the parts that he tells you, and as an unreliable narrator, you know he’s leaving things out. Sure, you also know his backstory and his internal monologue. You might even think you can comprehend him the best as his reader, but really, there’s this line between character and companion that we can never fully understand. This line mirrors his own initial experiences with Yoo Joonghyuk; at the start, YJH is only ever a character to him until he learns to see him as a person.
Basically, what I’m trying to say is that we don’t know 100% of Kim Dokja either. In the epilogue, Kim Dokja is split into two parts: 49, the part that his companions know, and 51, the part that we know. The part that’s been telling the story. ORV is so brilliant because it engages with us, the reader, as part of the story too. We further its thematic arcs through engaging with it; KDJ is to us as YJH is to KDJ, and that line between character and personhood is further exemplified through this. There’s a sort of hypocrisy there, in criticizing YSA, if, like me, you really only wanted 51 to be happy again.
HSY and YJH’s character arcs make me go wild because they recognize that nobody can ever truly know 100% of a person. They don’t care; they want all of him back anyway. This is all just to say ORV truly is the greatest found family love story ever written.
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Kim Dokja has this reoccurring fear of being forgotten. It's brought up in multiple arcs, from the 73rd Demon Realm/Revolutionary Arc to the Glorious Return Scenario to Kaizenix..It's always been a present - not exactly subtle fear that's often brushed off by his unreliable narration. In the Epilogue, this fear is realized by both 51! Kim Dokja and 49! Kim Dokja in different ways.
This fear is a natural one, but it also stems from Kim Dokja's identity as a reader and his tendency to distance himself from other people as an 'outsider' of the story (which physically manifests in the Fourth Wall).
The 73rd Demon Realm conversation between Yoo Joonghyuk and Kim Dokja is one of the more direct mentions of this fear. After Yoo Joonghyuk updates Kim Dokja on the lives of their companions while he was in the Demon Realm, Kim Dokja says this;
'As I listened, I felt somewhat sweet, sad and nostalgic.
"Everybody is busy living."
I felt a strange loneliness at the end of the story. I see. Everyone was living well.
[The exclusive skill 'Fourth Wall' is shaking.]
I realized that I was an 'outsider' of this story.'
In Reading Again, Kim Dokja says a similar line in regards to his loneliness at the end of Yoo Joonghyuk's story;
'The protagonist and supporting characters walked off with the sentence 'They lived happily ever after' and I was left alone at the end of the story.'
Although a story needs a reader, it will eventually end and leave its reader behind that full stop. Its characters will continue on living past that full stop, but for the reader, it will simply end there. In a similar sense, Kim Dokja's companions continued living on when his story as Incarnation Kim Dokja ended.
In both instances, Kim Dokja, the reader, is left alone. In both instances, his absence doesn't matter. They would continue living on without him.
'Without me, people were still continuing the scenarios. Just like Yoo Joonghyuk repeated the regressions. The 4th, 5th, 6th rounds… it led to an endless story where I could be easily forgotten. Meanwhile, people would move towards the ending. It was natural. It might be natural but I felt pained at the reminder.'
In the end, it's painful and it's lonely. Being forgotten like that is only natural as an outsider of the story - as someone who loves that story with every fiber of their being but could never truly be part of it. A wall separates the reader and the characters, and it isn't easily breached.
Still,
'Then I heard Yoo Joonghyuk's voice. "In addition, everyone is telling your story."
I slowly raised my head at the words. Yoo Joonghyuk's face was still expressionless. "They say it a lot. Your story."'
Even if they could've continued living on without him, they wanted him back.
'"Let's go back to Earth, Kim Dokja."'
And they tell him this.
The next time a similar situation to the 73rd Demon Realm where Kim Dokja is away from his companions or separated from them for a lengthy period of time happens is during the 1863 arc where Kim Dokja was gone for 3 years.
Kim Dokja returns as a disaster and can't communicate with his companions anymore. In this time, his companions would have grown and changed in ways he wouldn't know. He changed as well. Still, he hoped they would recognize him even with the scenario and all of its changes. (Quietly, he hoped they didn't forget him.)
'Maybe I had hope. The others were different but they would definitely recognize me. Perhaps I wanted to believe that.'
They don't, however. It's still a bit painful, a bit lonesome.
'Somehow my hair looked like tentacles to the other side. They didn't know it was me but I couldn't help feeling sad.'
It's not their fault. They ended up recognizing him - they've never forgotten. Most people don't intend to forget, afterall.
The next time, his fear does come true. He was 50 years too late this time and no one remembered him.
His loneliness, his sadness, his pain, and hope all swirl in his chest as he tries to make them remember.
'I was holding onto a certain expectation, a hope.
"I asked you if you have any last words."
If it was her, wouldn't she be able to remember me?'
Wasn't there anyone who remembered who he was?
Wasn't there anyone that cared not to leave him behind?
And then,
'"I've come to save my dongsaeng."
I was greeted by this overflowing sense of happiness.
..
There was someone who'd never change even if the worldview or scenarios around him did. Indeed, there would ever be only one such person even if you searched through this entire world-line.'
There was someone who wouldn't forget about him.
'But, I closed my lips just as they opened up half-way. I wasn't sure why, though.
My companions so far had forgotten about me. I was sure it'd be the same story for that dude, too. In a way, it might be the best thing for him, I thought.'
But, did he even deserve to be remembered? All this time, he had been afraid of being forgotten - of being left behind at the end of the story and so he continued reading. Now as the sole reader of that story, he was partially to blame for this man's suffering and yet he dared to hope that he would remember him?
Kim Dokja sinks into his guilt.
Yoo Joonghyuk glares at him.
'– You fool. You must be Kim Dokja.'
And he doesn't forget.
..
Kim Dokja reaches his ■■.
He splits himself in two - 51% and 49%.
One had to stay behind on the train and continue as a reader - as an outsider.
The other becomes the character, becomes the one who lives past the full stop.
No one would know about the existence of 51! Kim Dokja, and 49! Kim Dokja would get to live out happily ever after with his companions.
"But, I can still see them, right?"
Just like how it used to be, a really long time ago. And so, this story would continue on in that manner.
"…That's enough for me right now."
I stared at the back of the subway disappearing into the darkness. Now, the figures of my companions couldn't be seen all that well.
⸢And everyone lived happily ever after.⸥
I always hated that phrase. However, the current me dearly wished for that phrase to become true.'
And so, 51! Kim Dokja faces his longest held fear.
But. The story didn't stop. It continued on past that full stop.
They remembered him, who stayed behind on that train.
They could've continued on living without that part of him - but they wanted him back regardless.
They regress as a group. They aim to cross the Final Wall that had always separated them from the reader.
As they face it, another Kim Dokja confronts his long held fear.
49! Kim Dokja.
The fear that what's beyond this wall would confirm everything - that he wasn't the 'real' Kim Dokja, that he was simply a fake.
The truth hurts even more. Ah, he was truly Kim Dokja. He was 49% of him, afterall. But he wasn't the Kim Dokja this world wanted.
In the end, they both shared that same fear of being forgotten.
His companions push against that full stop to reach him.
At the same time, they leave him behind.
In the end, they lose both of them.
The Fourth Wall calls them greedy, maybe they were.
2 years pass by. They try to live on. They learn to live on through the story of another. Fragments gather together to make one - the parts one person couldn't recognized were remembered by others.
And now, there are no parts of him that are forgotten.
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share your character playlists with us we beg
aslkjglsdfg most of mine are on private because. they're so subject to change at a drop of a hat and also I constantly fear judgement but >w> since it's something someone's actually interested innnnnn
I can unprivate some and share a few with you haha
These are my One Piece ones o3o I'm very happy with Law's, Sanji's, and my Lawlu one, but the other two 🤔 well, they're still just vibes and all of them are stillgetting rearranged regularly asdlkjglkdfsg
Sanji - (❤️ ω ❤️)
Zoro - En Guarde
Zosan - i'll kick you in the front cause i've always got your back
Luffy - Sunshine
Law - Moonlight
Lawlu - Too Many Captains on the Ship
(Also, here's a few general vibe playlists I really like and blatantly browse for songs that Vibe Right! this is how i find new music idk what to tell you Sanji Lawlu Law)
Here's a few other ones I've made that I like for other fandoms that are more stable than the One Piece ones.
I really like my Obey Me playlists for Belphie, my MC in game 1 and my MC in game 2, despite having to leave that fandom for predatory-gacha-gaming-and-it's-addiction reasons.
(Venti from Genshin also has one despite me leaving the fandom for exactly the same reason)
For Touchstarved, I've made this Leander playlist public before- but since you're asking. Here's a second one I've had hidden this entire time lmfao. May become privated again at some point; who knows where my anxiety will lead me.
Sylvain is the only FE3H boi I've made a playlist for and it kinda says all. I love him. He's an angst pit.
BG3 gets one for Astarion and one for Tav(... Tavier. my Tav lmao). As well as a combo one that is literally just a mashup of the two that I'm not going to bother linking.
Ichimatsu from Oso-san and Nagito from Danganronpa both have xReader playlists that are entirely self indulgent.
Lastly, because this link storm is becoming chaotically long, here's three vibe ones I'm pretty happy with; one for Hypnos from the Hades game, one for Wally from Welcome Home, and one for Tendou from Haikyuu.
I have. So many more. They're literally spilling out my pockets asdlkjglksdjgd but these are the most stable and favourite ones of mine.
Let me know if any of the links don't work and uh
Sorry you opened the gates to the dam alkjlkjkfglsdjg >w>;;
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