girl my DR self insane im tryna live their life as a shifting exercise and bitch ur workout routine is killing me???

so every time I start exercising regularly again I start to get real fucked up about everything - I just ate pop tarts and donut sticks (leave me alone) bc I wanted them and it was FINE bc I worked out but it’s also not fine because I worked out, you know?? But I have to be ok with it or else it’s goodbye chzburger’s carefully built recovery. it’s so wild. brains are so wild!

Hey tumblr how do I go outside and get exercise when I am very sensitive to heat and it's warm outside and exercise makes it worse and holding back is almost physically painful

Apparently, by fitbit's standards, natural childbirth is only strenuous enough to count as "moderate" cardio. Like, my heart was beating 144 beats a minute. What more do you want me to do. Apparently "strenuous" is only reached above 200 bmp, a feat I'd only be capable of on meth.

I've decided on giving my s/i just a liiiiittle bit of muscle even though, in real life, I look like a redead if they had a scene phase

Just gonna make him a little toned... maybe try to start working out again just a little bit to try to match my s/i's physique

But I hate lifting weights because I'm noodle armed like Spongeboy me bob... and it's boring to me *all my favorite Jojo characters gasp, start crying, one faints* I wanna swim for hours!!! Ah well... I'll figure something out

(or I could pretend Vanilla is there encouraging me and stuff... let's just hope I don't rip my pants bahahahaha-)

Cw under the cut: a redead is a scary looking zombie like creature from L.egend of Z.elda. I made a little edit where one looks like they actually had a scene phase

If you think about it... Cream is kind of like a muscular redead /joke

Being USAmerican is just realizing you're thinking like a puritan every day multiple times a day.

"I have to run for this amount of time or else it doesn't 'count'" what are you talking about

"ugh this headache kills. I can probably handle it without pain killers though, I'm tough enough" what are you doing

"I don't like salad but I should eat one anyway because it's Good For Me" who are you trying to please

Like why are we so estranged from our bodies and what's comfortable and pleasurable. Why do we secretly believe that suffering is virtuous. It's not, it's just suffering for no reason when you don't have to. Your innocent pleasures hurt nobody, your pointless suffering doesn't benefit anyone, relax and let yourself be

(shaking myself by the shoulders telling myself this)

I'd love to stuff myself silly while you're at your spin class/at the gym. Sending updates as the class goes. Videos of me chugging weight gainer while you're working out

It’s only 45 minutes so you better pick up the pace. maybe a little over an hour if you count cool down and getting to/from the gym.

wouldn’t that be a fun challenge? I could make you the richest, thickest, most calorie laden shake I could find and expect it all to be done by the time I get home. Maybe we could increase each time - you’re pushing yourself the same as me, just in a different way 😉

July Fitness Journey Update

I made it! This month it was a challenge to stay on track. I worked a ridiculous amount leading up to vacation, sacrificing my health goals for a bit. Then I had a long vacation AND a bout of Covid. But overall, I didn’t slip. I still got my steps, and I managed four workouts during vacation (two of those post-Covid). I probably could have counted some of those 20,000+ step days as containing workouts because we did a LOT of walking. But I’m a purist. Workouts require workout clothes. 🤷🏻‍♀️

Seeing it all laid out this way helps me to celebrate my wins and not be too hard on myself for the bad days. Not sure if I’ll keep doing the posts. But I’m excited to see that I made it through a very disruptive month and stuck to my personal goals. Good job, me.

Last spin class of the year done! I am suitably exhausted and sweaty now.

I’m really pleased I tried the cadence club app this year - it’s much more my sort of spin classes and there’s a lot of variety with playlists. Today I did an underrated 00’s pop class and it was such fun. Except for when I spilt my water bottle everywhere in the third song!

Here’s hoping that I can get more organised and a better schedule for working out in 2024 - I actually have really missed it and it does make a difference to how I feel