Soo @redactedbloop (they’re amazing, if you see this post I love you dearly) and I spent the past two hours developing a list, I think it is the most important thing I’ve ever done. WITHOUT FURTHER ADO!
Redacted Throat-Goat Master List:
1. Damien
2. Gavin (in general, not counting Freelancer for obvious reasons)
3. Smartass
4. Freelancer
5. Sweetheart
6. Porter (in general, not counting Treasure for obvious reasons)
7. Angel
8. Darlin
9. Asher (in general, not counting Baabe for obvious reasons)
10. Huxley
Honorable Mention:
Guy, who is just very good at head.
Dishonorable Mention:
Lovely. They want to be good at it SO badly, they just aren't.
Important Note:
This does not include the Imperium, because if it did, Pet would win. Pet takes home every prize for throat-goating across the board. (Honestly, we simply didn't have enough space for the just outrageously cum-hungry characters on this show)