#this only took 300 years to make don't worry about it
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Hello! I love your writing <3 May I ask, do you have any headcanons for Gale? I have a few (eg: his mother raised him alone - he's an only child - as much as he enjoys homecooked meals he's very well known in Waterdeep's fine dining establishments) I'm interested in hearing what you imagine about Gale outside what the game tells us!
Lighter stuff
I agree with you on pretty much all points
Gale might appreciate wine but he strikes me as a fancy whiskey boy. It's a vibe I get
His mother hates the beard, which is why he didn't grow it out until the hermit stage
He loves all books. Magical tomes, history of Faerun, tawdry bodice rippers. And he has a system to his library but it makes no sense to anyone who is not Gale
Personally, I think he's well-known in all Waterdeep's dining establishments. He's in the Yawning Portal at some point as an adult but I also feel like he visits the finer restaurants- probably with his mother
he was raised wealthy, I know he like "oh I haven't dabbled in wealth" but my dear boy was Top Teir middle class at best. I don't think they were 'own the world wealthy' but I believe he grew up with more than just a housekeeper, not having to worry about money. Mama's got Sea Ward money
And of course (because I pointed out his 'tower' is in the Dock Ward) I think as an adult Gale moved to the "rough and tumble" part of town to prove himself. (which is probably why they know him in the poorer establishments )
His tower is a freaking row home, maybe its like two floors taller. But it is a house. Gale is just a fanciful man. Or he's manifesting that shit, idk
I also think he goes home to mama in the sea ward at least 2x a week
Gale is a sorcerer
Gale is 300% a sorcerer whose mother(not magic) was fed up with her shit being set on fire, so she sent him to train in magics the way she was most familiar - Wizard Apprenticing
Less Light Stuff
Gale mentions 'parents' once (I think during the I was denied a kitten speech) I think his father was there at first and then left. Maybe he couldn't handle Gale, or he was just a shitty guy. I think that was the road to Gales "I'm not enough, I must prove I'm enough" syndrome.
I also believe he first encountered Mystra in the Sea Ward at the 'House of Wonder' which is a temple devoted to her. I believe he was young like 13/14 but my guess is she was aware of him from a younger age. (Most wizards apprentice starting at 13... and usually have no spellcasting abilities which is...)
I don't think his favorite color is purple. I think it was Mystra's color and therefor it became his favorite (which is why I like dying all his clothes NOT Purple). Judging by the only room we saw, it's red/maroon/burgundy- but he doesn't know that
I think some of his stunts at Blackstaff were not just his own hubris though he sees it that way, but also at "hey mystra look at me" thing. Which I think she encouraged
I also believe that he was a young adult when the muse-to-lover transition took place. Maybe a few years after he left his apprenticeship, he was old enough to be a 'man' but it was definitely a product of grooming.
I don't think he was ever truly her Chosen. Most gods bestow cool powers (look at the dead 3) or at least protections. She just... screwed him? Taunted him with stuff she knew was going to keep him hooked on her?
When he saw Mystra's interest waning he panicked because he didn't have very many friends (his only named or mentioned friend is Elminster who has the most messed up history with Mystra) and he'd certainly not taken a lover once she 'chose' him. And I assume this was years before the netherese orb disaster. He probably did increasingly dangerous things/adventures to keep her attention, just like he did as a boy.
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Hey! It's me again! I have a request if you don't mind... Could you do a little headcanons with Azul dating a shark merperson? Their boyfriend/partner will be two times bigger underwater than on surface and their height on the surface is... lets just say... very tall. A little shorter than Leech twins, but still very tall. And lets add sharp teeth for them and narrow and vertical pupils. Lets give them a bad vision because if I know that correctly, sharks have a bad vision but they can sense smells well. Hmmm... and what about... I dunno like... they made a pinky promise in childhood that this shark merperson will protect Azul from bullies and Azul will be their friend forever no matter what?
If you don't like the idea, be free to decline my request!
(I'm sorry for my English I'm just usually talking in my home language and it's Kazakh so I'm sorry if I have grammar mistakes...)
The octopus and the shark
{not proof-read}
shark shark shark shark SHARK
And don’t worry dear! Your English is fine!
But, as a biologist and local shark lover, let me shill to you rq. Sharks have amazing eyesight (10x better than a human’s), can smell prey up to a mile, and can hear lower frequencies than humans, some types of sharks are protective and faithful to their partners, and sharks have somewhere between 5-15 rows of sharp teeth which equates to up to 300 teeth!
Anyway, here ya go! I went absolutely ham since you gave me so much to work with so it’s pretty long
I’ll just place this here
Have fun!
Sorry I popped off
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Azul has known you since his childhood years. You often stayed close together since the kids at your school didn’t treat y’all well
He was a chubby little octopus while you were a tall shark, practically two times his size
You, like the tweels, were feared by other students. Your towered over many of your classmates, your sharp teeth always managed to peak out in your smile, and your huge pupils often scared other kids
Because of that, it prevented you from making many friends in elementary. Well, that was until Azul
You often protected him from bullies and the like. You didn’t really have to do much, you just stood there and growled and they’d go running like little minnows
And you only grew bigger from there. You were practically the size of a young teenager once you hit middle school and during the acceptance of NRC, you were the size of an adult shark
As you grew, as did your love for the little octopus you had called a friend for many years. Little did you know that he also felt the same. All it took was a little push from the tweels and then you ended up together
When it was time to go to NRC, you’d all have to adopt a human form in order to go. Good thing there were people willing to support merpeople living on land
On land though, your size was significantly smaller just like the tweels. You still had some good height but it wasn’t even comparable to your underwater form
Even though your height was cut from you, you still retained your sharp teeth and large pupils, though your irises were more visible so you looked somewhat human
Sadly, Azul didn’t gain any height from his transformation and he ended up needing glasses on the surface because of that. Oh well, he still looked cute to you
You and the tweels ended up acting as Azul’s “body guards” though you ended up actually garnering the title while the tweels were his “hit men” so to speak
Even though you’re seen as this big, rough, tough, mean dude, you still held your soft spot for Azul and show it as such
You love giving him little cheek and forehead kisses whenever you can. During your shift as the lounge, while he’s working on contracts, or even during the school day. Whenever it’s possible, you do it
Although Azul doesn’t show it much, he’s a big cuddler. From small hugs and hand holding to literally wrapping his body around yours, he just likes being close to you
Now, how about some events!
Azul really wanted you on his team during beans day because you were absolutely perfect. Your sheer height, you athletic ability, your amazing sight, hearing, and smell, literally his ticket for an easy win
On Halloween, you shine even more! Your appearance only adds to your costume and the scare routine they had for the magicam monsters. It honestly made it more fun
During the endless night and while Azul is being possessed by a ghost, he honestly worried about you. Were you taken as well? Did you get possessed? You were hurt? He didn’t dare think about it
Oh, the joy he felt when he finally saw you in this twisted ghost world. He did not leave your side for the rest of the night, before or even after the party
Lastly, the masquerade. Azul was absolutely floored by your masquerade look. You looked so handsome! He just wanted to spend the entire festival and party with you. Also, please help him with keeping up with the very energetic freshmen
However, once the flowers ravaged the city, he was quick to make sure that you were okay and prevented you from using your magic. If you don’t end up going with him to the tower, he will endlessly worry over you and if you end up loosing your magic. Don’t worry, you don’t because I say so
Azul always wondered how he managed to meet someone like you…
. . .
“Hey, what’cha doing?” Azul suddenly looked up from his pot, startled by the sudden voice above him.
You were above him, sharp smile and wide pupils just staring down at him. You were rather big for an elementary school boy since your head barely fit the top of the pot.
He could easily tell that you were a shark yet you showed no malice towards him like the other kids. But that doesn’t mean he’ll immediately trust you.
“N-Nothing! Go away!” The little octopus shouted. You only pouted in response.
“Aww, come on! I just wanna see!” You whined. Azul felt he wouldn’t get much done with you hovering over him so he decided to just tell you.
“Well…I-I’m learning magic.”
That was yesterday during recess. When he went back into his pot again to work, he was suddenly pushed over and pulled out of his pot.
A couple of the bullies from class stood over him, pointing and laughing at him, saying that he’d ink them if they got too close. He could easily recognize half of them. His heart hurt, he could feel the tears start pooling in his eyes
“Get away from him!!”
Someone yelled. A sand cloud formed. The bullies started screaming and running away, some were even scratched or forming bruises on their arms or faces.
When the could settled, a familiar face stood in front of him, holding his hand out to him. It was the shark from yesterday. You.
He hesitated in taking your hand, but did so nonetheless. You helped him sit up and even lifted his pot back upright.
“Are you okay? Those stupid kids, they didn’t hurt you, did they?”
The worry in your voice, the concerned look on your face…why?
“Why…did you help me?” The answer seemed simple.
“Because it’s not right for people to treat others like that just because they’re different! It’s stupid! They’re stupid for thinking that way!”
It was such a passionate answer from you.
“Thank you.” The little octopus said. You smiled, your sharp teeth and multiple rows showing. Now you didn’t seem so scary, not that you ever were to him.
“Hey, if I promise to protect you from the bullies, can we be friends?” The wonder and curiosity in your eyes charmed the octopus. Azul had no choice.
“Sure. Let’s be friends. Your name?”
“Oh! It’s…”
———
“Azul! You okay?”
Azul snapped out of his daydream. He was in his office, a small pile of contracts in front of him. You were standing in front of him, still as tall as ever.
“You were daydreamin’ again, weren’t you?” Your eyes, pupils still wide even back then, and teeth poking out like fangs, showed a concerned look on your face. You really haven’t changed.
“Oh, y-yes, I’m fine, dear. Just thinking…”
You knew what he was thinking of. As much as you knew how he wanted to forget those years of his life, you didn’t. They were a part of him. You wanted him to accept that.
“Hey, I kept my promise didn’t I? Even now as we’re older, I still intend to protect you from anyone willing to hurt you. You believe me, right?”
Oh, how could he resist your adorable face.
“Of course I do, dear. I haven’t forgotten it.”
Azul brought your hand up to his lips and kissed your knuckles before standing up from his desk. He walked around the side before facing you, letting you place small kisses on his cheek and forehead before reaching his lips.
As much as Azul wanted to continue, you both had work to do.
“Finals are coming up. It’s time for the plan.”
You nodded in response. As he grabbed the contracts and walked out of his office, you trailed behind not too far from him. You smiled. You were glad his years of hard work were being kind to him, even though he still had much to learn.
Maybe he would, one day.
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#twisted wonderland#twst#twisted wonderland imagines#twisted wonderland x male reader#twst x male reader#octavinelle#azul ashengrotto#azul ashengrotto x male reader
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Batman Kidnapped. Chapter 3
Little by little Batman began to regain consciousness. When he was able to discern his situation a little, he realized two things. He was handcuffed and on the floor of an extremely luxurious place, probably a mansion
-Wake up sleepyhead - said a sensual voice coming from behind. Footsteps slowly approached. When they stood in front of each other Batman found himself facing a young man he had never seen before. A very beautiful man, he thought to himself.
-Where… where… am I? - He asked, struggling uselessly with the handcuffs that held him.
-Oh Batman. Don't worry about that. You're not even in your country. So you better relax.
-What is all this? I must… I must return to Gotham…
-I'm afraid that's not going to be possible for now, Batman. I guess you want to know what all this is. I think it's only fair that you know.
The beautiful young man walked away from him and approached the window that overlooked a garden that Batman couldn't see.
-You're mine now Batman. I know who you are, I know your secret identity, but I'm not going to divulge it. Don't worry about that. I've been in love with you for years. I became obsessed with you a long time ago. Your perfect body, that sensual suit. Your beautiful buttocks. All. So I started investigating you. And finally I could see how you acted, what clues you followed, how you caught your enemies, who you were behind that mask. Bruce Wayne. Who was going to say it? A playboy millionaire channels his sense of justice dressed as a bat at night catching villains. We have the same age. 32 years. And my parents are dead too. But nobody cares.
-Let go! L..let me go please!
-You're going to be mine for a week Batman. You are going to be my property for that period. You will be at my entire disposal. We're going to have sex as many times as I want, in the way I want. When we're not doing that you're going to be here. You are going to eat top quality food and my butler is going to come and clean you every day. The entire house is surrounded by snipers. I left your utility belt but I took out all the contents. I just added a device that will give you a 300 Volt shock if you make a wrong step. I also have Robin and Alfred captured. Any wrong step on your part and they die. If you try to make contact with someone asking for help Robin and Alfred die. If you don't agree to my every whim, Robin and Alfred die. I just have to press a button. Do you understand, Batman?
-You're mad.
-Yeah. It's true Batman. Madly in love with you. You're the only man I'm attracted to. I'm tired of being surrounded by people who kneel when I enter a room. All that obsequential people! But not you. You are the only one who never kneels for anyone. So I ask you one more time, Batman. You have understood?
-The only thing I understand is that you are a disgusting ruffian.
-That outburst only indicates one thing. You haven't rested well. You must continue sleeping. But first let's test the device on your belt.
The prince said the order "discharge" and then two electrodes stuck into Batman's skin, sending an electric shock throughout his body. The hero screamed in pain as he arched his body. Immediately afterwards he was dejected, sweating, but did not lose consciousness. However, the prince knelt beside him with a handkerchief soaked in chloroform that he pressed to his handsome face. Batman could only resist slightly and after blinking for a few seconds everything was darkness again.
#captured#trapped#robin#batman#hero#leather#ia#nightwing#herofetish#hero love#gay hero#gayhot#gay men#gay art#gayboy
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The landlady
After collage I took a job 300 miles away. To a city I knew no one. I took what little money I had saved and my few possessions and set out. I rented a room from a middle age woman. Well the job although would eventually be good for my career. The pay didn't go as far as I anticipated. Everything was much more expensive here. My father was one of those men where failure is not an option.
Jackie my landlady is a loving woman. She is short and a little chubby. But always with a smile on her face. But when fell more then a month behind on the rent she sat me down.
"Paul, I know you have been working hard. But we must all pay our way." She said patting my leg. I went to speak but she hushed me.
"Now there are other ways to pay your way" she unbuttoned her blouse. I sat up straight.
"I don't, I mean I am flattered. But I couldn't take advantage of you" I told her.
"Young woman have been paying thier way with sex for centuries." She removes her shirt. And stands
"Now I know you haven't even been on a date since you moved in, 8 months ago. That is way to long for a young man to hold it in" she dropped her pants. And stood before me in a plain white bra and black panties. She took my hand and led me to her room.
"Now you do no how to eat pussy don't you?" She smiled pushing me on the bed. She removed her panties and sat on my face. She hovered just above my mouth now let's see what you got" she said I started to kiss and lick her. To be honest I had only done this a few times with an ex. After a few moments she stopped me and got off.
"Okay, so you lack experience. Let's hope this works better." She said pulling off my pants and boxer. My dick was rock hard. But Jackie made a disappointing face when she saw it. It didn't stop her she mounted me my 5 inches slid into her very wet pussy easily. She removed her bra and her large breast looked good but sagged.as she rode me I got very excited quickly. I went to stop her. We had not used protection I thought. But I finished before I could.
"What was that?" She scolded.
"Sorry, I mean are you on the pill" I asked as I started to get up.
"That's it? I have to tell you it was the most disappointing time in my life" she was yelling at me.
"Get your ass back on this bed, you aren't going anywhere. Now you owe me $1200. What you just did was worthless. But I will give you $50.
"Jackie, I don't understand" I stuttered.
"You are going to pay me back or you can leave now" she told me.
"What would you like me to do" I said defeated.
"I will teach you to please a woman for free and once you can I will let you work off your debt. She looked at me with a evil smile.
"We could start with you licking your pathetic mess out of me" She told me. Straddling my face. I tried to turn my head.
"Stop, you are going to do this. Don't worry know one will know" she said. As a glob of cum fell on my lips. With no other option I open my mouth and lick up my own cum. Jackie tried to give me instructions on how to please her. I had swallowed all my cum. When Jackie gets off me. She sits on the bed and spreads her legs.
"Look" she was annoyed as she pointed and touched herself. "Suck here, lick even nibble"she walked me through a woman's pleasure ananatamy. She positioned so I could see. Then had me try. Different things, starting and stopping.
"And you can stick your tounge in my ass as well" she told me. After about 30 minutes she let me have a go. Telling me to mix it up surprise her. Pay attention to her moans and noises. I bury my head between her thighs and eventually make her cum.
"Much better, unfortunately we can't do anything about your size but we can work on stamina." She informed me. "That is unless you milked eating your own cum" she got up and went to shower.
I went back to my room. Abita ashamed but I had just had sex for the first time in over a year.
The very next morning, Jackie entered my room and woke me as she got on my bed she was naked and straddled my face. I didn't hesitate I tried to remember everything she had taught me. She shifted at one point and my tounge slid between her ass cheeks. I had no choice but to lick her asshole. She loved this. And pressed hard against my face smothering me. I drove my tounge into her asshole. It seemed to open up for me. She came and calmed letting me breath. She just got up.
"Don't take care of this, I may have use for it later" she said grabbing my hard dick. I got up and took a cold shower. I came out to find Jackie had made me breakfast. She only wore a robe. I found I couldn't even look Jackie in the eye.
"Paul, you will need to become an expert in oral. Or you will never keep a woman with your little dick" she said bluntly. I had never thought I was small. Average wasn't I?
"Well that is unless you let her cuckold you of course" she added.
"Cuckold?" I asked
"Um, let her have lovers" she said then looked in my eyes to see if I understood. I was confused why would anyone let thier girlfriend take lovers? She saw my confusion.
"Some men love it when thier girlfriend, wife take bigger better lovers. While they stay faithful. Some like to watch thier wife get fucked by other men. Some wear panties and take on the more submissive role in the relationship.
"This all makes you excited" Jackie said. Getting up and grabbing me thru my pants.
"No its, well your breadt are hanging out" I tried to explain. She just smiled. Letting it go. I spent the day looking for a part time job. When I got home. Jackie was getting ready to go out for the evening. Was home alone I had no money so I just stayed home and watched TV. Jackie came home about 11. She walked in and grabbed my hand and led me to her bedroom. She was naked in a flash and again laid me on the bed and mounted my face. I instantly had my mouth full of another man's cum. Jackie rode my face making me take it all. I didn't stop until she came again on my tounge.
"Did you like that?" She asked. But grabbed my dick it was rock hard she took that as a yes. She took my dick in her mouth. After a few minutes I feel her push her finger into my ass. She focuses on my ass. Fucking me with her fingers. Before I came in her mouth she jumped up and kissed me feeding me my own cum. Then having me suck on her tits. She held me and had me sleep in her bed that night.
in the morning I woke with her holding me.
"Morning sleepy head" she said kissing me. I was a bit thrown.
"What?" Jackie laughed
"You're old enough to be my mom" I said
"So you want to call me your momma" she laughed. This all got her riled up.
"I want to teach you all about pleasure" she cooed grabbing my dick she starts to jerk me off. As she did she laid so she was behind me. And nibbled on my ear. She would start and stop.
"Tell me about your sex history" she whispered. I told her about my two girlfriends one in high school one in college.
"Any boys, you know a experiment" she asked.
"No" I moaned as she stopped again
"You seemed to like my lovers cum, maybe you should try one" she teased. She didn't let me finish instead smacked my ass. Gave me money and sent me to go buy coffee. I got up dressed and went to buy breakfast.
when I got back Jackie was waiting in her robe. After we finished she looked at me
"Strip" she told me. I still wanted to cum so I did. I stood naked in the kitchen. Jackie comes up behind me and bends me over the table.
"I want you to be my little boy toy. You can leave here for free and I will make you feel more pleasure then you ever imagined" she holds me I fell something cold poke my ass. She applies lube to my asshole.
"Jackie no please" I wimpered as she worked in her fingers. But found myself moaning as she did.
"I know it feels amazing" she assured me. She replaced her fingers with something else it was big it hurt as she worked it in. Soon the pain turned to pleasure as she fucked my ass in long strokes. I found myself pushing back to meet her thrust. She reached around and stroked me twice I shot my load on all over the table.
"Lick it up bitch" I did as told as she still fucked my ass. Jackie finally pulled out I was barely able to stand.
"You are mine, I will take care of you, support you, you will be my little submissive sex toy"
I moved into her room. Although since I no longer paid rent Jackie made sure I didn't waste my money saving it for a rainy day. She was actually a year older then my mother. She would go on dates a few times a month and always came home and fed me another man's cum. Which was followed by her fucking my ass. But I spent most nights with ,y head buried between her thighs. It was three years before I got a promotion and made enough money to get my own place. But would still go back to visit whenever I needed a refresher in pleasure.
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longform here but on rereading the lost hero camp jupiter is so. fucked up.
like don't get me wrong, i love new rome and the idea of it and how utopic it must seem to percy and the other young demigods, but there's a fundamental mismatch between camp half blood and new rome.
camp halfblood's problem is that there are no adults. being a demigod is very, very dangerous. we don't see many members of camp half blood surviving into adulthood or coming back as camp counselors. one of the oldest at the camp is luke, who's only college aged. and so what you get is a society of teenagers - of course there's a pecking order, because it's a society of teenagers. of course the rules are blatantly unfair, because it's teenagers making them and policing them. the only two adults who are in any way intimately familiar with the demigods are chiron and dionysus, neither of whom are mortal and understand the true struggle that's happening here.
and so yeah, you get this situation where it's not safe to be a greek demigod, and you probably won't live to adulthood. but it's not because they're not trying. it's because teenagers just aren't always capable of protecting and raising and safeguarding each other while trying to do the same for themselves.
the problem is that that environment is mirrored in new rome, where the legion is a protective force but also a very, very dangerous one. quests are dangerous. monsters are dangerous. even war games are dangerous - gwen would have died before percy had even slept one night at camp jupiter if not for the doors of death. they explicitly mention that the incident where the fifth cohort lost the eagle was "a massacre."
except that while camp halfblood is this way because they don't know there is another way, camp jupiter is just....not. assuming a fourth of new rome - population around 300, according to hazel - is too old to fight and a fourth is what would reasonably be considered too young, you have a community of around 150 grown, capable adults, who grew up in the legion, who were trained to fight, and who have the perspective of age to see how barbaric it is that there are 200 teenagers being used as their front line.
but the thing is that new rome kind of quietly just....pushes that away. pushes that thought to the side.
see, the thing is that camp jupiter isn't actually within the safe haven bounds of the pomerian line. they have the little tiber, but it's clearly not as powerful as, say, the camp half blood safe havens - it took percy using the river to stop the gorgons. but most of the legion can't use the pomerian line for protection because you have to be unarmed to enter it. they protect the pomerian line, not the other way around.
in any other society, it would only make sense to take the 10 years spent serving in camp jupiter - the 10 years it is explicitly most dangerous to be a demigod - and shelter children during that time. if you come to new rome under 18, you should be housed. you should finish your education without worrying about which of your friends will die in the week between now and exams. you put your years of service into keeping that community alive after it's nourished you through the worst part of your adolescence. And you could probably halve the years of mandatory service if demigods weren't dying at 11 years old so often.
and the thing is, that's actually how camp half blood operates. The point of it IS to provide young demigods a safe place in the absence of adults who can meaningfully help them. It's dangerous to be there only because it's dangerous to be a demigod. Should Greek demigod adults maybe be taking more responsibility here? Yes. But camp half blood's resources aren't prioritized to them. Their purpose is to shelter teens, not adults who have passed the worst of it and can reasonably support themselves. They're not safe because the resources available are not adequate to ensure full safety.
at camp jupiter, instead, the teenagers are removed from daily life and put on the front lines - why? because they're disposable. there are resources there, but they aren't for the teens. they can't be members of the community, because it's too dangerous to rely on them, to count on them, to absorb them fully, until you can be sure they're not gonna get killed. not to mention, you can keep them in the legion because they have nowhere else to go. where camp halfblood said "we can't guarantee your safety unless you stay, and we have things that need to be done," new rome only allows members to muster out of the legion if you've served ten full years. imagine how someone like nico would have been treated if he truly was a child of pluto. he wouldn't just be a runaway, he'd be a deserter - there'd be none of the 'showing up every now and then for a hot meal and vanishing' thing. he'd be gone for good. "you give us your life in exchange for the safety we can provide. if you leave you can't come back."
and that attitude, that the rule of law at camp jupiter reigns supreme and those who fail aren't worthy of staying, permeates into everything involved with the camp. camp half blood has satyrs who explicitly search for and protect demigods until they realize who they are, and it's implied the punishments for failing to do so are relatively severe. at the very least, they don't like sending out satyrs who've failed to try and protect more children. jason, leo, and piper meet annabeth for the first time because the camp knew there were demigods there and came for them to bring them somewhere safe.
but roman demigods as a whole are just built different, right? all of them find the wolf house and get prelim training with lupa and then end up in new rome.
except...it's not all roman demigods. it's just all the demigods new rome knows about, and not even that, because hazel herself hasn't been to the wolf house. her cover story is that nico found her in new orleans and brought her personally to the camp. it's all the roman demigods who didn't die on the way down from the wolf house. it's all the roman demigods who didn't die trying to find it.
and yes, i know it's big stupid to try and apply adult rules to YA novels. of course the real reason for all of this is that it's more fun this way to a younger audience, and for that i have no complaints.
it's just fun to think about.
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my server vs netflix
Long post for a few mutuals who asked about this 🏴☠️
Netflix (according to the geeks on server forums -- so this could be off a bit) has individual servers that hold about 100TB of data each, and Netflix claims they have around 18,000 servers worldwide.
Netflix has about 3000 movies and 1800 TV shows available in the United States at any given time. It varies in other countries, but is similar.
This is my server below (pen for size comparison and purple sticky note covering the super bright blue light that bores into my brain)
It's got 5 drive bays, and right now I have 60TB of storage space in it (meaning it's just a little smaller than one of Netflix's servers), and only 37TB of which is currently used. I can easily expand with add-on bays once I fill up the 60TB.
I currently have 4470 movies and 862 TV series, all with closed captioning that I've curated and about 100 of the TV shows have bonus scenes and specials included.
My server cost me about $2700: $1200 for the 5-bay box and the rest was spent on hard drives over the course of 2 years -- 5 inside the server and 6 backup drives. I bought good drives when they were on sale.
I spent another $300 on a range extender for my house so mom and dad could watch in their bedrooms without interruption.
My home internet costs $50 a month and I'm able to serve friends and family in the US, Canada, Europe, and Australia. It's not always accessible (sorry Australia and your shitty internet), but it's up most of the time.
I never take movies/TV shows off of my server, and all the TV shows have their original DVD soundtracks, so nobody has to worry I'm going to remove their faves or ruin soundtracks.
I take requests from anyone, adding it when I find it with no judgement on content.
I don't charge anyone for using my server, and yet I'm paying less than I used to for internet and streaming services.
My payments for internet and streaming for my business and two family houses (Charlie's house and my house) used to be $900 A MONTH ($450 of it was the business internet because ISPs gouge businesses even though the internet usage at the shop is less than home).
Just before I quit Cox Internet, they were about to raise the cost and my new total would've been $1000 per month.
My monthly payments are now $220 for internet service and streaming services. So within just a few months, the server paid for itself.
I still have YouTube TV, Netflix x2 (one for each house), Hulu, and Discovery+.
I'm not saying the average person can set this up, but I want to make it clear that streaming services aren't the mysterious, unknowable magic that people think they are.
They're just servers (hard drives) with data on them and a good internet connection.
Anyone can set up a home server. You don't need a $1200 box like mine. Even an old computer/laptop or single hard drive will work.
A brand new 2TB good-quality hard drive that could hold about 1000 movies or 60-80 TV series would only cost $60 plus another $29 for a basic enclosure/case. (I bought mine from NewEgg for backups)
I use Plex as my media server program. It has a free version and a paid version. I bought the lifetime pass on sale for $90. It goes on sale 2-3 times a year. There are other programs out there too, including Kodi, which has a Netflix skin so it looks like you're using Netflix.
Plex and other programs like it already have a huge library of metadata, so I didn't have to create my own cover art or fill in any other information other than title & year for movies or title + season + episode number for TV shows.
Careful naming of files and sorting in properly-named folders is all you need to have this:
It took me about 3 months to download and organize most of the movies and TV shows in between working and taking care of my home/family. Now I update the server once a week and it takes about 2 hours a week to download/update new TV shows and movies.
I wasn't able to torrent when I had Cox Internet, but the new $50/month ISP doesn't give a shit. Even so, I use a VPN, which is $9 a month just in case they ever decide to get touchy about torrenting.
The server does regular maintenance on itself, and I have backups of everything.
I realize not everyone has the tech skills to set something like this up, but even if one tech person in the family or circle of friends has the ability, they could serve around 60 people.
The most I've had streaming at one time was 10 separate people watching different things, and my server handled it with no problem.
Others on the server forum claim they've maxed out around 25 people simultaneously watching, but 60 people is the number suggested because not everybody will watch at the same time.
Streaming, as it currently works, does NOT support anyone related to the creation of TV shows and movies.
Hopefully this will change, but even if it does, that doesn't change the fact that I can easily support creators myself by buying their DVDs, merch, going to cons, and donating to them or their projects directly.
Right now, pirating movies and TV shows doesn't hurt creators because streaming services and big studios are the main villains, and if all you did was donate $5 to your favorite TV show/movie, you'd be giving them more than if you streamed their content as many times as you wanted each month on a big streaming service.
I have movies and TV shows on my server that aren't even available from content creators anymore due to greedy CEOs and execs who dump their content for tax breaks.
If more people switched to using their own servers, MAYBE it would scare the greedy assholes into paying content creators what they deserve, but in the meantime it's a great way to enjoy content that was created to be shared and to support the creators.
EDIT: I need to add that streaming a TV show/movie as much as possible in the first few weeks of the release date DOES help the show get renewed and the movie execs are more likely to buy future movies, so please stream as much as possible then to help content creators. After that time is up and the streaming service moves on, then it's totally fine to pirate.
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It has been 300 years since I've worked on a particular fanfic and I want to return to writing it but I am filled with Concern About My Writing Abilities and Anxious Procrastination. I come to your blog to humbly request words of wisdom and/or encouragement. I will send an ask about Izzy Hands as humble offering.
OKAY. PULL UP A SEAT.
Firstly: read my blog title. No, really; read it. There's no such thing as wasted words, you improve every time you write, so if you go back to your fanfic and you write 1000 or 10,000 or even 100,000 words and you're like "man, this is shit, I don't want to post this" it's fully and 100% okay to delete all that crap and do it again but better. You've learned. You have upped your skill. You have levelled up, it's just that in Real Life (damn that reality thing) you don't get a cute little ding when you level up, you just have to believe it's happening.
Second, I genuinely think most creative skills are like riding a bike, except maybe not the way you expect. I don't think that when you pull that bike back up you just immediately and without fail know how to ride and don't fall off, but I do think that after an hour or so of scraping your knees and rolling around in the dirt, you will get the hang back, instead of it taking however many hours and hours it took for you to get that skill to begin with.
If you get back on the bike, steel yourself and start pedaling, you will remember how to ride eventually, even if it doesn't feel like that at first.
Assuming that you are not a vampire and are in fact a human being and are exaggerating somewhat with the claim that it's been three hundred years since you last wrote this fic, I also believe in seasons of creativity. Sometimes you'll output so much you're like, "Where did all these words come from?" and other times weeks or months or even years will pass with little to no writing (or art, or sculpting, or sewing, or whatever creativity you might do) to show for it and that's okay.
Plants go dormant in winter and bloom once more in the spring, and so will your writing if you let it. It's okay.
If you're worried about consistency, I highly recommend going back to your WIP and rereading it. Curl up in a cozy blanket with your phone or sit with a cup or tea or something and just...read through your fic again, and let yourself enjoy it as a reader, not just the author. Make notes in your head (or on paper, if that's what you're feeling) of what you like about it, what you don't like about it, and what things you've written that might be setting up future chapters or passages for you to draw from. My longest fic is an cql fic which is 86k and when I do go back to add more to it (which I do plan on doing), I will reread it all before I do, and not only get that reader-y feeling of, "Damn, I wish this had more chapters!" but also refresh my memory of where I was going with it and what my plans were.
Now, as for procrastination. Is your Anxious Procrastination because of anxiety about your writing abilities? If so, all of that above might just help, and at the end of the day you don't have to post anything you don't want to. You can write and write and it never see the light of day, if that's what you want.
You don't have to feel anxious about posting until the moment you decide to post.
For other kinds of procrastination my Official ADHD-Haver Recommendations are:
Get a timer app or one of those cube things, set it to a reasonable amount of time (say, 15-20 minutes) and turn it on/flip it over and tell yourself you will Work On The Thing for that long. Having an "end" time for if you struggle works wonders for giving my brain the feeling of leaving when things are too hard, but I rarely have to use it, I usually just keep going. I also find the physical act of turning on the timer (I use YAPA aka Yet Another Pomodoro App for Windows) clicks my brain into a different Zone than "sitting around messing with Minecraft" or "doing absolutely nothing and being mad at myself about it".
Find a playlist or some ambience or something. Earmark it as your Writing This Specific Fic music/sounds. Only turn it on when you're working, and turn it off when you're done. Pavlov is a strong tool for these things.
I'm a big fan of 4TheWords which is a gamification app for writing. I really like it (I have a referral code if you want one), and I find the fun vibes, the inclusive atmosphere, the cute lil creatures you battle while writing etc all really helps give me a dopamine hit while I work that I don't really get from just writing into Scrivener or something.
FocusWriter is another app I really like. You can customize the themes (so you could put like a blurry OFMD image in the background for the vibes while you write) and it's (optionally) full screen to minimize distractions.
If you're still struggling to get started, maybe find like a list of numbered prompts, roll a dice and write like 100-500 words of just... whatever comes up for whatever character or ship you feel like writing. Something just to get you started. I always find it easier to write once I've written, if that makes sense.
Always leave your work unfinished at the end of each day. Sounds daft, but what I mean is: always stop for the day mid-sentence, mid-word if you can. When you come back, you'll see, for example, this: "Izzy has never felt so betr" just lingering on your writing app and you'll go, "Oh yeah, betrayed," and you'll type out the "-ayed" and your fingers will just keep going to finish the sentence, and the paragraph, and so on. That said, if you're posting a final chapter of something, maybe just start the first sentence of whatever you want to write next? Even if you don't come back to really dig into it, you have that word to finish. (I left mine at the end of a sentence today and I am mad at myself for it)
Reread the comments on your fic, if you have them. Let how much people love and enjoy your work wash over you.
Open your writing app of choice and write down all the reasons you're anxious on a bulleted list, then go back, hit enter on each one, tab in for a bullet underneath, and argue with yourself. Tell yourself why your anxiety is so silly and why you're super wrong. Not only does it get you typing into your writing app (see what I did there???) but you'll be surprised how much debating yourself can help with anxiety.
I find most of my own Anxious Procrastination comes from fears of publishing (both my original stuff and my fic), because the idea of Putting Things Out There To Potentially Never Be Finished (hi, yes, I have ADHD and I never finish a damn thing unless I try So Hard It Hurts - see also: my 80k unfinished cql fic) and then am I not a Failure? Am I not a Let Down?
But I also got some amazing comments on that fic, from people who genuinely got a lot out of it, even if it did never get finished (so far 😠) and so I go back and read those, and remember that most of the people who commented on those chapters didn't... really care, if it never finished. They cared that the specific chapter that really got to them existed to begin with.
And I also think of Game of Thrones a little (well, the books). If he never finishes those books, would it take away from the joy people got from reading the ones he did put out there? I don't think so.
So I try to focus on that, with my own anxiety.
This got a little rambly (what, Jess? You? Rambling? Never!) but I hope it helped. Let me know if it did or didn't, please! 💖 And good luck with your writing endeavors!
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Are you a worried Christian, conflicted because you are being drawn to a pagan path but concerned for your mortal soul due to your upbringing.
The number of people going to Church is declining year on year, pews are empty and many churches have simply had to close their doors. The number of people however who identify as pagan is growing rapidly as people discover a more flexible approach to spirituality. In this post I hope to put your mind a rest by giving a different view point to the common concerns of those thinking of converting.
Am I going to hell?
Nope it doesn't exist, even in the original bible. The original Hebrew bible does not contain the word "hell" neither did the original copies. It was only much later in the King James bible that it became common. It is thought to be a miss translation that originally simple meant the grave. It could have been added to help keep parishioners in line, as priests ever since have used it as their main sermon to "Drive in the fear of God". One theory is that it was actually added to help convert Nordic pagans who stuck rigidly to their beliefs. So Helheim one of the nine worlds and ruled by Loki's daughter Hel (keep in mind this religion predates Christianity) simple led to Hell. The images that the world hell brings to mind are mostly thanks to a 14th century poem called Divine Comedy, describing Dantes decent through the circles of hell and the artwork this has generated. So you shouldn't be worried about something add just to keep parishioners compliant.
But the church says witches are evil!
As Christianity grew the male leaders became concerned that women and some men were not converting and choosing to stick to their pagan beliefs. It was only in the year 906 that a church law was added to state that "the operation of witchcraft was heresy". However the actual text is aimed more at stamping out the remaining pagans who worshipped "Diana the goddess of pagans" in their words and trying to make her appear evil. The idea didn't really catch on and it took another 300 years till pope Gregory IX authorized the killing of witches and then things got really bad. Pagan traditions threatened the churches control and had to be stamped out, this was far more about power than anything else, control the religion control the people. Ask yourself what is more evil, a maid who makes healing potions and is the local midwife or a religion that authorised the killing of between 5 and 9 million people just because they didn't follow them? Sometimes to maintain power and keep a people in line you need to create a common enemy, Witchcraft simply provided an easy target. "Evil is as Evil does" and one of these practices is far worse than the other.
But I want to still believe in God!
So do, don't confuse Faith and Spirituality with Religion. Christianity at its core is just a book written by men who died a long time ago and used as a way to control people, bringing themselves riches and power, they are not the only way to their god. There are lots of other Religions that also believe in one true god that are not Christianity. Splitting yourself off from Christianity does not mean you have to give up your faith. Those in pagan traditions who follow a different deity mostly do so because they have been drawn to them not because they are forced to do so. With Modern witchcraft there are no rules and you are free to discover your own path, make your own decisions and question everything, instead of following a religious dogma blindly.
Can I still follow the Christian Celebrations like Christmas?
Yes they are pagan not Christian. From the Bible we read that the Sheppard's were tending their flock when Jesus was born. This only occurs during lambing season so would put his birth in spring. So why do we celebrate at mid winter. Pagans were already celebrating hard at the winter solstice, Christianity at the time was seen as rather dull and restrictive. So Christmas was created to help people to convert and the traditions continued although the church never really approved, indeed various attempts were made to rein in the event which went against a lot of church doctrine. Before the Christian Easter was conceived pagans were celebrating "Eostre" a fertility goddess who's celebrations revolved around eggs and bunny's (Sound familiar). Christianity really didn't bring any new traditions here but joined in with the rebirth theme. Ps even your christmas tree was a pagan tradition from Germany.
Can I still go to Church?
You wouldn't be the first pagan to do so, In Dorset so popular was witchcraft that in 1816 a full 50 men and women from the Methodist church were expelled for being witches (that’s one heck of a coven). Not put off they simply moved to a local building and continued to practice there for 10 years before being allowed to return to the church. Interestingly the building became affectionately known as Conjurers Lodge.
Lots of Churches are built on important pagan sites and aligned to celibrate the solstice. A good example is the Isle of Portland. The two main churches “St Andrew’s (built abt 1150) and St George’s” (blt 1754) were specifically aligned for solstice worship, even though this meant that St Georges ended up on barren area with few people. St Andrews receives the sunrise on the winter solstice and St George is aligned for the sunrise on the Summer Solstice. Pagan practice hidden in plain sight.
I should warn however that openly coming out as Pagan to other church goers is normally going to get you kicked out or worse. So tread carefully.
What about my Immortal Soul?
The idea of a soul came originally from Plato and other Ancient Greek philosophers long before Christianity. In Hebrew the person is split into your inner self (Nephesh) this how you see yourself, it also describes your body (Flesh and bone) and your outer appearance (Shem) which is how you are seen by others including your reputation. The original bible simply referred to a persons Nephesh. This was later translated as a soul and far more meaning added to it. If a soul exists it is yours, not a religions. It is a part of who you are and will remain with you no matter what.
I hope this has helped those who need it.
If you like my posts don't forget to like and follow for more.
Click this link to find my Master Post with great ideas for those new to the craft.
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Some random thoughts on Obey Me! Nightbringer up to lesson 10 (with LOTS of spoilers)
If you ask why I'm making a post like this in this blog is cause I will defend that this is a queer coded game to my last breath –and cause is my blog and I do what I want.
Full disclosure: I'm not done with the first game yet so no spoilers for that one please. I'm guessing I'll get spoiled by Nightbringer anyways as the story progresses, and I already did lol, but I wanna gush about this game because I love it so much already.
Starting with the title screen, oh my gosh the art is beautiful. 10/10 would definitely buy a poster of this.
They continue using they/them for MC and that's a thing we all gotta appreciate. Thank u.
The layout and the art of the game is just SO PRETTY in general. Definitely an upgrade from the first game, credits to the designers and artists.
It's a rhythm game!! I like it, the gameplay is easy enough and in classic Obey Me fashion you gotta be really precise when you click or else, which adds a good layer of difficulty.
We don't have 8 different types of support items, just 4, which makes it easier to keep count of how many we have. I am still broke in-game to buy them tho.
WE CAN GET DEVIL POINTS BY COMPLETING LEVELS THANK U SO MUCH. In contrast, I feel like they give less materials when you clear a stage? I mean, they gotta balance it I guess, or maybe is just me.
The game was lagging like hell when I first started playing tho. Idk if it was the game or my phone that couldn't run it or what, but it's fixed now.
I love the fact they're using the character songs for the levels!!! I was waiting for the unit songs and they took a while, but they're there too. The remixes are fun and I can't believe how good they sound.
Speaking of sound, this game's ost is SO GOOD like huh? I was kinda expecting it cause it's a big production and all but bruh. Every now and then I end up having to stop because I gotta appreciate the bgm. There was this one funny song where a banjo started playing and I straight up laughed out loud. 10/10
MK is that you?
Coming back to the layout and the designs: THERE'S SO MUCH RURI HANA IN HERE!!!!!! Love it. 20/10. Best thing ever. Whoever decided to add that I hope they're having an amazing day.
Also, is that a Ruri Hana Miss Em?? Gosh I love this game.
And I'm not done gushing about the designs yet cause LOOK AT HIM!!! LOOK!!!! He's so cute!!!!🧡🧡🧡
HE'S SO PRECIOUS JUST LOOK AT HIM!!!!! 🧡🧡🧡
The art for the cards is really pretty and I need more Levi cards so badly asap
Also, there's a shit ton of extra content, wow. I'm not sure how I feel about the whole 3D models yet (mostly cause my phone only gives me bad renditions of them) but the extra content is slice of life funny bits. I like that they're voice acted, they're good.
Hey so y'know how you can click on the characters and get voice messages in the home screen and how you interact with them in the surprise guest screen? In neither of those I can click on Levi's tail and I consider that a crime against all Levi stans.
OKAY SO when this game was announced and as time went on and we got little pieces of the plot, not gonna lie I was worried. When it comes to time and time travel this franchise has a, well, a record. I'm still worried how it's gonna develop but for now I really like the things they're showing in the main story regarding the characters and the plot. Just, y'know, fingers crossed it doesn't become a mess.
Honestly the timeline is a mess already as it is. We met Luke and he has apparently just started learning how to bake, but in the first game he says he's been doing it for about 300 years, so it's been only 300 years between the end of the Celestial War and the beginning of the first game? Shouldn't the time be at least a few thousand years?? I'm solving this by doing a headcanon that time moves differently in different worlds cause otherwise the lack of coherence bothers me too much.
I'm so intrigued about Nightbringer himself. You think the prologue is giving us a red herring about who he is? Will it be a new character? An old one? Us from the future? They did a good job in implementing the mystery and I can't wait.
I was rereading this chat we have with them at the beginning of the game and something caught my eye:
Do you think maybe we'll start jumping between time as the story continues? So that we'll be at and see different time periods with different characters?? 🤔
This guy has an omurice for an icon when we all know he can't cook to save his life and I find that so ironic xD I like how much he's getting involved in the story so far too
I still don't know who gave them the right to go THIS HARD on a rhythm otome game. I love this thing what the hell. I wish I went this hard with my own projects.
That's all, I'll be waiting for more lessons to drop✌️
#obey me#obey me!#obey me! nightbringer#obey me nightbringer#nightbringer spoilers#spoilers ahead#om! nightbringer#queer
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Since your a taekooker, I wanted to know what your opinion is on the whole November 8th, 2015 being Jimin and jungkooks anniversary theory. They’ve posted things that were on certain hundred day mark multiple times (like 100 days, 300 days, 1000 days, 1500 days. Although, some of these were posts that were just Jimin or just jungkook, not together), it seems like that number (1108) has been referenced by them on multiple different occasions (jikookers bring up the biggest moment being when jungkook posted the story with the time 23:08 on it and Jimin saying the whole student thing with the numbers 2 3 15 after it had been 2315 days since that date) and multiple other things. If you would like, I could send you posts that explain it?
I’m not a jikooker, I just want to know what your opinion is on this since you don’t think they’re dating and it seems to be a very popular theory between jikookers.
Thank you!
Hi anon!
Kinda confused by this ask, though it's quite alright (don't worry), because you kinda already know my answer to this right? I don't think Jimin and Jk are together, therefore I don't think there is any anniversary date to start with. I've also not gone through this extensively, so I may not be entirely aware of everything surrounding this idea.
But to elaborate a bit. It appears to me there is not much to base the actual November 8th, 2015 on. Only one short video of Jk and Jimin together on Twitter(?), which Jkkrs have dubbed Jikook day. That can not stand on it's own as proof at all. So if your starting day is based on nothing, then why start counting from there? There's also been no consistency in posts from either of them on 100 day's marks, not even if you combine their posts. It's only a few instances that match, which can easily be seen as coincidences, since Jimin and Jk post regular as it is. You can also not deduce any meaning from those posts. Who knows what was meant by them? Pics of them together are not rare, Jk posting songs is not rare. None of those instances can stand alone as Jikook proof. So all there is really is fanbased theory.
I don't know if this is true, but to me it looks like someone took the releasedate of GCF Tokyo and made that out to be a special dat in general and that way 8th of November 2015 became Jikook's anniversary date. They came across some posts that fit that narrative and a headcanon was started. Jkkrs talk about the appaerance of the numbers 11 and 8 in some posts as if it's too much to be coincidence, but if you look at ot in the timespan of ten years, and take with that the amount of posts in general, it really is coincidence. Same goes for Jimin mentioning 2,3, and 15 at that concert. It cannot stand alone for anything. What kinda day is 2315 days even? With their schedules I can imagine them losing track of time and places constantly.
So, no I obviously don't think anything of this, except that it's fans trying to make something fit. I don't even place significance on Taekook dates really. It's stuff I think fandom won't be privy to.
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Do you have Faroe Islands and Aaland islands OCs? 😊 Or other children of the Nordics. How do you view them? I would like to know
I do have Faroe and Åland oc's though they're both kinda work in progresses still 😅
for a total list you have
Denmark's kids
Kalmar Union - Henrik (deceased)
Kristiania - Benedikte
Sweden's kids
Åland - Kristiina
New Sweden - Johan (deceased)
Ladonia - Arvid
Norway's kids (not particularly in age order; my man got around during the viking age lmao)
Shetland - Liv
Orkney - Bodil
Faroe - Ida
Iceland - Ari
Isle of Man - Erik
Caithness - Ailsa
Sutherland - Solveig
Greenland - Sia
Helluland - Anders (deceased)
Markland - Aksel (deceased)
Vinland - Dagny (deceased)
how I view all of them would be a really long post so i'll just do what I have for Åland because out of the two you asked for I have more on her haha ( side note; I hc Finland as being trans and all three of Sweden's kids were mothered by Fin)
So anyway; Kristiina was born in the 1380s around the same time Kastelholm Castle was built. That makes her younger than all of Norway's kids by a good 300 years, but older than Denmark's oldest by about 10-15 years (aka her and Henrik were physically about the same age). Her childhood was interesting, cause not only was it a time when upper class/noble parents weren't all that involved in raising their children but also Björn wasn't around all that often, and Kasper really didn't get along all that well with Björn at the time and was distant not wanting to acknowledge they had a child together. All of her cousins were either far older, or had more responsibilities than her; because I do believe her and Henrik did a few years of their basic schooling together he reached about ten and suddenly was being taught things 'not appropriate for young ladies'. So she's alone again.
In August of 1521 when Harald and Björn got into their Last Big Fight, the Straw that would break the camels back; all she remembers about actually leaving are snippets where she woke up to her papa carrying her, and her parents whisper arguing about something (she couldn't tell you what). She was told she woke up at some point and asked where they were going but was just told not to worry about it, and to be quiet. There was a year or two where she was left in Lübeck in Germany with a couple different people to watch over her. She didn't really see either of her parents for those two years, they didn't even technically come back for her. A letter just came one day asking for her to brought to Stockholm. At the time she was just relieved to see her parents again, but now she sometimes look back at it in a bittersweet way, it took two years of being apart for them to be excited to see her.
I'm gonna jump forward to 1809; she's about fifteen physically when Finland and Åland are ceded to Russia. For the first time in her life she had no one to speak to except her mother, Kristiina had always gravitated towards Björn because he never well... he never seemed as if he regretted her existence, to be blunt. Even when he was gone on months long trips for some reason or another she would beg to go with him to avoid being stuck with just her mother. But her uncle was there at least, and Kasper turned into an entirely different person around Kalev; a happier person, even if comparatively the situation was worse.
It was still super odd for Kris, she had been around mostly her dads family her entire life and suddenly she's been moved from her home and is interacting far more with her mom's side of the family (her Finnish is iffy at best at this point). And her mother, a woman she had always known to be very quiet and fidgety was suddenly loud and always getting in dumb fights with her siblings. The big turning point in their relationship would be a fight they would get into where something along the lines of "Don't you want to go back to Stockholm? Don't you want to go home?" "Stockholm was never home." would be said.
jumping to modern day bc i'm bored
she's kind of distant by now, her relationship to both her parents became odd once she went to live by herself, and even a little more when Arvid was born because both of her parents were happy about him and it upsets her seeing them treat him differently.
It's not as if her relationship with them is absolute garbage, and she's bitter and isolates herself now. She's just an adult, and there's things from her childhood, and with her relationships to her parents she's had to reconcile. I think she's accidentally become very close to Kalev because he seemed like Kasper's opposite while still being family and someone she could see regularly. She did want to be apart of Sweden again for a little bit, but not in a 'would be upset if it didn't happen' way because she is also trying to be on better terms with Kasper.
I don't know... she just had a long and complicated childhood most nations do, and now she's just doing her best to hang on to the things she did like about it, while also trying to forget most of it? If that makes sense.
also kinda random side note: I think she prides herself on being more 'quiet and stoic' like Sweden but anyone who's been around her for more than five minutes knows she is neither of those things and is far more like Finland. Though no on is going to tell her that.
#hws åland#hws sweden#hws finland#sorry this took so long!!#hetalia#i know it's kinda rambly and long i'm bad at talking about oc's personalities without giving entire histories about them
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Just to explain the culture and differences of media's and why I'm hesitant to explore new social medias
Tumblr is the first social media I took part on
Back in 2015 as a high schooler I wanted to take part on the people excited about content, however I found myself getting the feeling of constant reaching into a void.
Tumblr is and remains a algorithm nightmare for new skill creators, to get any follows you need to reach out beyond likes and reblogs, your blog should clearly show your content type and people will reblogs if they feel comfortable enough with you and like it enough but good luck getting interaction. It had the purge moment and it became an even larger void until recently. Currently under 3000 followers (note this is the one I've been on the longest).
I then naturally looked for other social medias for more interaction DeviantArt
There are only artists there and frankly not even a good space to place a portfolio go to Artstation if you want to have good examples of portfolios and find jobs for it. DA is more a mess than ever and with the Ai situation there is nothing but lack of respect to the creators. Currently under 300 followers
I looked into Livestream areas for artists Picarto
It's a space where people talk while they draw and found friends on those spaces but the spaces are quite small in audience and still quite niche to artists. Twitch came by storm and the picarto is still used but overshadowed. Last I checked I had under 100 followers (but only 5 views a stream)
Twitch I also looked into to watch artists who transitioned over
The space is well, more like an entertainment center they have themes and you pick and most people are more likely to pick the gamers than the artists. Unfortunately. Also under 100 followers and under 5 views a stream
I found Instagram around 2017-18 ish? I didn't like the format in comparison to Tumblr the requirement of images or videos for post but I kept it anyway.
It's necessity for images requires more action from the poster and their algorithm (at the time) was fairly reliable, tags were helpful they got your posts to people who searched said tags. Stories were also very nice, I could share thoughts and polls and doodles without a worry of making my posts messy. I broke 10k followers on Instagram. Then they changed the algorithm and tried to imitate TikTok and it feels like a mess. Currently at under 16k followers.
I tried TikTok for a hot second mainly because people were stealing my art and nope, i already do so much work making the art I don't have the time as a college student to make it video appealing as well. I think I got 200 follows for the short time I was active.
So on to Twitter.
I have made the most friends and enemies here. The space is designed for people to interact, you see the good and bad of your favorite topic. You can have group chats polls threads and posts and gifs. Currently it's on fire. I liked the format I entered with the mind I wasn't going to be maintain an effort of aesthetic or worry over follows like I was with Instagram, which was the right mindset to have. I made a goal to interact with people without a care of them not responding and after a year people actually responded the space grew on me. It was nice to be acknowledged of the years of effort I put into art skills, I didn't see bots on my posts and I made connections with cool artists and writers. Currently at 13k followers.
Most recent media I've entered is discord
I created a discord but I don't qualify it as a social media. It is a group media you make a little spot for you and your buddies and if you already have a large following from somewhere else then it's for you and that group. And it be as helpful as possible or as cultish as possible. Cause it's just a group of people and the rules they established and that's the reality you live in. Currently my discord is at just over 100 followers.
Other website I've been on are simply not worth mentioning they simply faded in the moment, require other skills, not meant for artist, or are Facebook (and yeah don't 🙏)
So there you go I played my best cards on every space as a learning online artist but I wouldn't lie and tell you to go to Instagram or Twitter to gain a following even tho they both have my highest followings they have turned into a wild fire of destruction or brainlessness. Instagram literally with have the same video by 6-10 different people and it drives me crazy. Twitter is burning in Musky fires and who knows if it's breaking as I post. But I am here waiting for a social media that doesn't exist. Because the problem is this.
New social medias don't exist. Not in the eyes of the nonartists. Most of them see twitters down and go awww then open up Instagram and scroll through reels. Artist are scrambling. We literally have no clue where to go. Most of the artists who make money do so because of content cannot turn to Tumblr or insta because their income is in more mature material. And these two places will panic cause you posted two boys kissing with no shirts then punish you if not kick you out.
New social medias even the ones fine with that kind of content need the flow of audience. People online will not care unless the media style has something that make everyone feel valued in a new way.
The new way whatever that may be should happen soon tho cause we all out here dying and looking for audiences to consider commissioning us or following us on Patreon (another group media btw)
Anyway if you read this whole thing sorry to not have a space to go but stay calm there's good people who will figure it out.
#rambles#not art#inky rambles#social media#i still think tumblr has great potential#what if they’re actually good noodles?#message me back tumblr#i have ideas
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Introductions! (Again)
Okay, now that we're doing explicitly out of character stuff on this blog, time for proper intros for all of us. This is going to be a lil lengthy, so we're putting it under a cut.
Cat
Species: Fox
Age: 300
Pronouns: She/her
Cat's definitely the funloving one here. Food, alcohol, cuddling, basically her jam. She also has disturbingly good luck and has the second most malleable thoughtform out of all of us. I'm pretty sure she literally can't remember bad stuff, which would explain a lot.
Kris
Species: ??? (fey? maybe?)
Age: ???
Pronouns: Not yours
As for me, I was our childhood anger issues, then I spent time in nonexistence jail till I popped out again, leeched some parts off of the Entity Futurely Known As Cat, and became this thing after a while. Don't worry if you didn't follow any of that, I don't get it either.
I have difficulty recalling good memories, but I use sarcasm and an excessive love of tropes to dull the pain.
Jeanne
(Outdated Model: Picture to be replaced if we ever get around to it)
Species: Robot (Modeled after an angel)
Age: Early 30s (mentally) roughly 15-ish (literally) we're not telling you our actual age (physically)
Pronouns: She/It
Kindasorta our first and only foray into intentional headmate making to date, Jeanne was built to help us deal with our depression as a teenager. Note to anyone trying to make tulpas: don't make their entire existence around helping other people, it's not good for them. She's still trying to balance her desire to help people with being her own person, but she's definitely making progress. Shares a love for horror movies with Cat.
Victor
Species: Frog (Or maybe a toad? idk how to check and it's not like he can tell me)
Age: mute (tho literally he's almost 2 years old by this point)
Pronouns: He/They
Victor was an interesting case. On day Cat starting carrying around a stuffed frog in our headspace. At this point Jeanne was still in her "freaking the fuck out about our plurality" phase, so she started freaking the fuck out over the possibility that it would turn into a headmate. Then it turned into a headmate. He doesn't talk much, mostly because saying anything in English for more than a sentence at a time gives him a headache. He can manage Toki Pona just fine, but it took us months to find out that exists. tbh he's the chillest one here, I'd be flipping tables if I couldn't speak for a couple months.
😭Calamity
Species: God
Pronouns: She/Her
Age: Literally incalculable
Long story short, we tried making a Fate OC that wasn't a self insert, and now she's a self insert. She's usually the most level-headed one of us here, though she does have her moments. Also, she hates the cold with a passion. We're learning Nahuatl to help her be more comfortable in our skin, though it's slow going.
Sitna
<picture to be added>
Species: Demon
Pronouns: He/Him
Age: teens? ish?
Y'know how I said I used to be our anger issues? Say hello to the current title champion. Despite that introduction, he's actually a pretty nice guy, in a toxic masculinity "I must be strong at all times" kind of way.
Mara
<picture to be added>
Species: Demon
Pronouns: Changes, mostly She/Her
Age: ???
Yes, that Mara. The Kama one. Also Sitna's sister, somehow. Loves tempting people into ruin and all that jazz, which is why we don't let her front that often. Jeanne falls for her wiles pretty often though.
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Yesterday, i finally fixed my bathroom scale. All it needed was a battery. And, to my horror, i discovered i had gained 15 pounds. I have crossed my Rubicon: i am now over 300 lbs. My bogeyman is here.
So i made an appointment with my PCP. I could see him immediately! Cool! So i went in. I tried to mention my intense fatigue from the beginning of the year, thinking it might be a concern. I tried to mention my unrefreshing sleep and asked for recommendations for a different sleep neurologist. I asked if he might have any colleagues who specialized in PCOS. Also, i took for granted he would consider that one of my past doctors thought i had hypothyroidism.
The dude talked down to me the whole time. Fatigue can be anything, he said. You're going through some tough life events, all you need is some good old-fashioned exercise and diet. Let's get you to a nutritionist. Talk to your sleep neurologist again.
He repeated over and over for me not to worry. Which is when i realized: he thinks I'm overreacting. He thinks i came here on a whim.
Motherfucker my problem is that i don't react fast enough!
The thing is, this isn't my first rodeo. I have been on many diet and exercise regimens. I have noticed weight loss only twice before: once, when i played basketball in high school and was doing intense cardio five times a week; the second time was when i almost completely cut out carbs. The low-carb diet was a very slow process, but it was working. It was a literally agonizing experience because i would crave carbohydrates so much i was shaking. I am not sure it was healthy, in retrospect.
This is something my Special Dietitian made me realize: that in the name of health, we form disordered eating, and prize physical appearance over actual fundamental health. I only want to exercise and diet if they are inherently healthy.
I just want to live life without feeling like I'm on a quarter tank. I also don't think needing to fall asleep in the middle of the day is normal. I don't think gaining 15 pounds in 6 weeks is normal. And i know the difference between feeling tired because i need to sleep and tired because I'm low-energy/something is off.
I hate PCOS so fucking much, if only because it makes everyone think I'm lying about my health habits.
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March 13th, 20__
It was a hard, but good day today. Wren and I both have wednesdays off from our job, so we went out to Peigi's place to work on getting the garden there reading for the growing season. It was unseasonably warm for March, but then the last three years in a row have been the warmest globally on record. So, really, while I'm glad the sun has come back (less than a week until the equinox!), I'm worried about the heat waves and wildfire smoke that will certainly hit us this summer. Ugh, not looking forward to that. Just, hopefully no actual wildfires here.
Anyway, it costs a whole two hours worth of wages to drive out there, so we try to spend the whole day when we go- and yes, we've designed the garden around that. We packed a lunch (sandwiches with my sourdough and some black bean tempeh we've been working on), and a plan to fill the day.
See, we haven't been out there since the end of fall, and the crocuses out there have just now started to bloom. (Ours bloomed the last week of January, but we're pretty close to the water and they're halfway up- well I was going to say mountain, but with Mt. Tahoma right there that seems silly. Halfway up a tall hill? They're at roughly 2000 ft of elevation, and we're barely at 300. Still high enough we don't have to worry about the rising sea level though!) So today we went around and took down the temporary deer fence from the last two years (yes, that really should have been taken down last fall, but, well, life happened. What matters is we're getting back on track now... Right?), weeded two 4ft by 70ft rows, refenced one of them, and sowed fava beans as a cover crop/deer lure in the other. We also talked about putting in a real, sturdy deer fence- I think we can afford it this year, and Peigi and xyr parent, Nancy said they could pitch in.
Did I mention that we're getting to garden/farm/forage Peigi and Nancy's land in return for sharing the harvest? It's a pretty sweet deal, and the only reason why Wren and I kept our place in town.
So, anyway, out at Peigi's, we grow the plants that appreciate cooler temperatures (because that urban heat island effect is real! our place is toasty, and I don't appreciated it), plus the plants that are riskier to grow on urban soils, namely root crops and low growing leafy greens. That leaves the fruiting crops and heat lovers for our place (tomatoes, green beans, eggplants, corn, squash, etc, etc. And amaranth. Because amaranth is awesome). Well, and the raspberries and such, because up until now our place has been better protected from the deer. Small yappy dogs are good for that!
Anyway, it's still a bit early to start things out there, as they're still getting hard frosts and a little snow, but I sowed some fava beans, and while the deer have munched on the garlic, it's still there. I'm hoping that with generous enough fertigation that garlic will size up and make a decent harvest. Yeah, yeah, the deer ate them last winter and you'd think I would learn- what, the deer fence? Why didn't that keep them out? Uhhhhh, well, it's not a great deer fence. It wasn't actually a deer fence, or it wasn't originally meant to be for deer, it was originally an electrofence for sheep. And sheep are less nimble than deer.
And since no one wants to hunt the deer any more because of the chronic wasting disease and the cougar and other predator populations haven't rebound yet, there's too many deer, and this is the hungry time of year. So they're a bit desperate, and willing to eat things they normally wouldn't bother. Like garlic. I'm frustrated, but I can't blame them. And I certainly don't want to eat them myself. Ugh. Thus, getting a better deer fence, and in the meantime planting the favas as a distraction. Hopefully it works.
Where was I? Took down the fence, weeded the garlic/other things bed, sowed fava beans, covered them with fall leaves from like 6 months ago, put the fence back up around the garlic bed, checked under the mulch on the other beds (which, the soil looks so much better than it did three years ago! It actually looks like soil now! Deep mulching and cover cropping and patience for the win!). Wren was displeased by all the native black berry, but come on! Having that as a weed instead of the (invasive) cutleaf blackberry? I'll take it! I'll take it home, that is! I'm going to set up a really simple trellis and see if I can grow it semi-domestically so that it's easier to pick the berries. As tasty as they are, the vines are just unpleasant to walk through.
We also went through the wooded area and took out more invasive blackberries and did a light thinning of the native berries there. We really haven't touched that area, so it's super thick and very hard to work through, and it's mostly salmon berry. We'd like more thimbleberry, salal, and huckleberry, so yes, we did remove some salmon berry to make room for the others. I feel a little guilty about it, but it is the most abundant. I put them in the back of the truck and will post to the local groups to see if any one wants some. Not quite the right time of year for transplanting, but they're still dormant, so as long as they're mulched well and watered this year they should do fine. Also worked on expanding the trail, and checked on the nettle patch but they're still doing nothing. Too cold yet.
Now I'm back at our place, and it's time to do a little resting and relaxing before the next work day.
#solarpunk fiction#be gentle#it's my first time#I eventually want to build this in to a whole world#but this is just me day dreaming of what a more sustainable food#system would look like#in the transitional period between now and you know#a more hopeful solarpunk future
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I'm simply posting this to get my thoughts out
I've had a rough month, and the months before weren't much better. I'm at home as the caregiver of my husband, and we live off of his Pension only. The problem is the rent was raised, electricity and heating, phone and internet increased as well and the food prices are just continuously going higher. It's really the food prices that pushed us to the absolute limit now.
It's enough to pay the rent and bills, but after these are paid, there's hardly anything left to last the whole month. Last week I had to decide between getting migraine tablets or food. I decided on the food.
I'm not eating much anymore, because I'd simply not possible. I only make absolutely sure that my cats are cared for properly and my husband.
On Saturday, I had to leave some bread behind at the checkout, because I had a few cents missing. I must have misread the prices. I felt horrible. And embarrassed.
I did start a fundraiser a couple of weeks ago, to help us raise money to move to a more affordable apartment, but I'm not getting anywhere with it, because I don't have enough exposure, that a post of mine would be seen widely. Besides, I had a hard time to get myself to post it on twitter. I just felt horrible and I was worried to anger people.
But despite all of that, I'm not unhappy and I'm thankful. Because at least I have a home, I'm not cold, I have water and my wonderful cats who are all fed and warm and my husband.
I also have hope for the future. I'm sure that I'll earn at least a little from monetization later on, once I have enough followers/subscribers on my accounts. I might even get tips from people who like our content and live streams. If I'm able to earn 200€ (212 USD) or even 300€ (319 USD) a month, it would make a huge difference in our life.
I'm thankful that I am finally able to try this, since my daily migraines were reduced to just a few attacks a month thanks to the pill, which I got for PMS. Unexpectedly, it also took away these near daily migraines I was having for years. Of course there are triggers that will bring them on instantly, like stress, panic, or physical activity. Now I'm able to actually spend time on my laptop or phone to create and to interact with others.
I love sharing our life in my posts. I always loved doing it. I enjoy it so much. If I'm able to get my own income from it, even if it's little, it would change my life in a big way. Not just financially, but emotionally. I would finally have money that I earned myself again.
I am going to improve our lives, and will work hard on it, while also enjoying what I'm doing.
Sorry for the wall of text, but this is the only place where I felt comfortable to write about it.
#cats#life#home#prices#problems#stressed#struggles#blog#finacial help#worry#thoughts#hope#thankful#grateful
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