#this is what happens when I’m left alone in art class
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#my art#fanart#deltarune fanart#deltarune#spamton#spamton g spamton#no context sorry#this is what happens when I’m left alone in art class#enjoy y’all’s singular deltarune post of the month lmao
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✰ stray kids as uni bfs!
warnings: mentions of food, too much boyfriend material, cause of death: uni!seungmin, inconsistent use of correct spelling
welcome to my first post! <3
-✰bang chan
uni!bangchan definitely… struggles :’) he stays awake till 2-3am every night, either doing homework or procrastinating and making music. thank god his roommate basically lives with their partner, because u get to stay in his dorm with him during these early mornings, urging him to stay on task so he can sleep.
u guys met at the gym!!! u were trying to get back into exercising after the spring break and he saw u on the treadmill. literally hearts in his eyes. like the shy guy he is, he waited until u were almost out of the door before asking “do u go to the uni around here?”
let’s just say he was giggling and kicking his feet when u offered ur number to him <3
bang chan credits u for every completed assignment! he loves that u are so willing to help him, even if he is embarrassed to ask sometimes. (it goes like, “babe.. ugh i’m so sorry but what the fuck does he mean by this?”)
he will get u breakfast from the campus cafe before all of ur morning classes. he says it’s his job as a boyfriend, even if he only got four hours of sleep! (one time he slept in and got u lunch AND dinner to make up for it)
-✰lee know
lee know is an interesting student to say the least. his electives are all “art 101” and “basket weaving” because those are the ‘easy’ classes (sadly, no college class is easy) though, surprisingly, he is very interested in his major classes! studious student.
his go-to look is glasses with a comfy hoodie and sweatpants. when u see him on campus u can’t help but stare. comfy bf material.
u guys always seemed to cross paths at the off campus grocery store! u happen to be picking up comfort snacks after crying ur eyes out due to stress :( he strolled down the same aisle as u, quickly recognizing the university hoodie u had on, staring longingly at what oreo flavor to choose with fresh tears in ur eyes.
“i like the java chip ones :)” after he saw ur tears, he bought them for u.
ur dates consist of: trudging along campus to classes together, movie nights with snacks in the oh so comfy twin sized dorm bed, and grocery store runs! he also loves to do sheet masks together! (just don’t tell anyone how soft he is for u)
studies come second to him. u come first <3
-✰changbin
a jock but not in the aggressive type way. he just wants to lift and pass his classes. (which he always does! nothing below a B- for binnie)
he is good with in-class work! whipping out assignments while the teacher is talking about the subject is light work for him. but homework… alone in his dorm…. his kryptonite. for some reason focusing is so hard in that situation!
when u first heard him speak in economics class, u didn’t expect him to be so sweet?? u sat a couple rows back, so good thing he couldn’t see ur constant staring. his smile, his biceps, his too-tight shirts, his everything.
group projects are ur guys’ weakness because you somehow always get put together. (not that u mind!) in ur third group project this semester, he bit the bullet and asked u out! he was so nervous that he made a whole google slide saying “will u go out with me?” he asked han to decorate it lol.
studying together is no easy task. ur talking about currency then suddenly in a sweet make out sesh! he said he couldn’t handle the “sweet” looks u were giving him.
really soft boyfie !
-✰hyunjin
my art student. what else would he major in?
you guys actually met in starbucks on campus! hyunjin tries to do essays in a cafe setting to “stay focused” (he really just wants to be aesthetic).
you work as a barista, and after taking his order, he couldn’t take his eyes off of u for the 2 hours he was there. he ended up sketching u instead of write his essay! shockingly, he was able to muster up the courage to at least ask ur major before he left (aka, rushed out and ran into the door).
you guys are the sickly sweet couple everyone sees on campus. u are always together!!! hyunjin wants nothing to separate ur hand from his >:(
of course, when he has freedom to choose for his big projects in his art classes, he always chooses something that reminds him of you. he doesn’t like painting portraits that much, so he will choose to paint ur favorite flowers, your first date scene, your hand holding his… yeah, he’s that type of boyfriend :’)
he despises his required classes, like english and math. he doesn’t understand it like he understands art, so he needs ur support!! please run ur fingers thru his hair when he’s whining about his weekly reading!
he loves ur relationship more than anything <3 he’s so happy he can spend his college years with u
-✰han
oh boy. how do we even start this.
i think he tries his best. he really does! he doesn’t want to be one of the few in his class failing, but he just doesn’t really grip onto learning the required subjects like english.
this is how u two met! u work for the university as a tutor, and han was required tutoring for english or else he would get dropped from the class :( he showed up to the tutoring session in an empty lobby in the main campus building, and as soon as he laid eyes on u, he cursed himself. he was supposed to be learning, how can he do that when he has the prettiest person in front of him!! :’(
even outside of ur sessions u help him all the time! he appreciates ur help so much, and of course he doesn’t want his partner to have to help him with his work 24/7, but u don’t mind at all.
his schedule is chaotic. wake up, go to class, go by the convenience store to get both of u snacks, come back to UR dorm, nap in UR bed, wake up when u get back from classes, walk around campus together, get dinner in the dining hall, then fall asleep at HIS dorm.
he always praises himself for choosing to live in a quad with his own room and praises u for working for the university so u get ur own dorm. “it’s like we knew we were going to date!”
he always shows his love and appreciation. power college couple <3
-✰felix
felix has the time of his life in college. he loves being independent, doing something new, and just taking it all in.
that’s why he decided to be ambitious his freshman year; getting a job right away at the campus cafe, and also continuing his hobby of dance by taking a freestyle dance elective!
u were also taking the elective class to try and get more in to ur passion for dance. u never felt too confident in ur skills, so what better way to improve than in a class with others that were learning too!
when felix walked in the room the first day of class, looking all professional in his beanie, oversized sweatpants and a plain t-shirt, u were immediately attracted… but also intimidated!! he must be so good (>:d) u guys actually got put as partners for ice breakers, then a partner project, then a mid-term project, realizing how genuine and sweet he is!!
let’s just say,, things got a lil close for ur projects. flirting was a given around him and kissing, definitely happened.
and even though his excitement for college was a 100! his grades… struggled to reflect that :( like others, college is hard to grasp sometimes!! u continued to help him and remind him that everyone is having a hard time too <3
another sickly sweet couple. he just can’t pry himself away from u!
-✰seungmin
i kinda feel like seungmin is like,, the perfect fit for uni boyfriend? he just gives off those vibes to me so much. (yes i am seungmin biased haha)
does he have all 100% in his classes? yes! does he procrastinate? hell yes…..that’s all he does. to try and help his problem, he wants to study with u! he thinks that this will help him focus more bc silence is always comfortable between u two. but it just ends up him playing some game and u watching, messing him up every time he’s close to passing the level.
if you guys have an in-person class together, he wants needs to sit by u. he doesn’t find it right that u don’t want to sit next to ur own boyfriend. how dare u actually want to listen to ur professor instead of engage in snarky side conversation the whole time >:(
he loves walking around campus late at night. not like, 2am but more like 10pm lol (cuz besides staying up for hw, i feel seungmin is an avid sleeper). after ur night class, he will meet u by ur dorm building and walk around, hands linked the whole time. this is the time where he’s affectionate and loves to talk about ur relationship aww!! it’s conversation like “i remember the first time i held ur hand”, and “we should have another takeout homework date in the library soon”.
i could literally go on and on about uni!seungmin bc it’s a perfect match ahh.
-✰i.n
high school classmates to college classmates! it might have been handy to know someone going into college…. if u and jeongin even knew who each other were.
“yang jeongin? he was in my homeroom? uhh-“
i.n thought that he didn’t need help going thru his first year. he wanted to be independent and make friends on his own >:( butttt with each passing day, adjusting to new classes and even his roommate moving out, he couldn’t even manage to talk to someone new for more than a minute.
u finally recognized him when u saw his academy hoodie he was wearing one day! u rushed to reach him before he entered the classroom, and when u two made eye contact… god jeongin thought the world stopped.
from then, u guys slowly started seeing each other more, than exchanging numbers, then hanging out! ur hangouts usually consisted of studying, but it always ended up in doing to the dining hall and eating together, staying in their right until it closed.
let’s just say, u both struggled in the homework department. but quizzes?? yang jeongin is, surprisingly, an academic weapon.
he loves quality time with u. staying up late, just being in each other arms and talking about nothing.
he will also most definitely require u to watch old minecraft videos with him. quality time right! :)
masterlist!
#sapphire’s log~#🎧#stray kids#kim seungmin#bang chan#hyunjin#lee felix#changbin#lee know#han jisung#yang jeongin#skz headcanons#skz x reader#stray kids imagines#stray kids scenarios#stray kids soft thoughts
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(the best of a) simple thing
sort of a follow up to (don't look) but I want it, tho more of a prequel
Pairing: Yuta x reader
Word count: 2723
Warning: some slight mentions of nsfw stuff but mostly ok
When you walked into his apartment - and effectively into his life - Yuta never imagined he’d become so hooked on you. You had seemed like a bad company, like clear trouble. But you’d found him through a mutual friend, so he let it slide. He needed a roommate, and the worst that could happen would be having to kick you out. Or so he thought.
He never thought he’d become obsessed with you.
Well, obsessed is a strong word. Heavily infatuated could do. You plagued his mind constantly, and just your presence was enough to have him red in the face. Yuta thought that it was just a sexual thing, over time it would fade. It didn’t. And sharing an apartment with you, getting to know you, only made it worse. On one hand he’d be jerking off furiously to the thought of you, on the other he’d be aching to do the most domestic type of shit.
One thing he found himself desiring pretty quickly was to see you dressed in one of his clothes. It was hot, yeah, but it also felt cute as fuck. Sure, he didn’t tower over you, but his oversized shirts would still look bigger than your frame. To Yuta, the thought alone was enough to have his heart leaping - and his cock hardening - in less than a second.
Though, he never thought that would actually happen. Until it did. The first time he got a chance to see you in one of his clothes was on a rare day that he was going from college straight to your shared apartment. It was a day off, and he had plans for it, until it started raining out of the nothing while he was still in class. When it came time to leave, the rain had turned heavy, water falling from the sky with rage and bringing a cold wind with it. Yuta considered himself lucky for always having an umbrella lost somewhere in his bag.
To his surprise, when he came to the arched entrance of the college building, he saw you, looking into the rainy street with a desolate expression. It was rare for him to see you at campus, the buildings where the visual arts students had their classes couldn’t be further from his own. Slowly, he walked up to you, coming to stand by your side as he watched your expression.
“You forgot you your umbrella again?”
You almost jumped by his side, and Yuta couldn’t help the laugh that bubbled from his chest. He muttered a sorry when you looked back at him, eyes burning with anger. Even that was cute. Looking at you now, he also couldn’t help noticing how you had your hands rubbing your arms, body closing in tight on itself. You were dressed in just a tshirt and jeans, clearly not expecting to get cold any time soon.
“Yeah,” you respond with a pout, “this is ridiculous, it was sunny when I left home!”
“The weather changes a lot around this time of the year,” he adds with a shrug, pulling the umbrella from inside his backpack. “I can give you a ride if you want?”
“Don’t you have to go to the office?”
“Nah, got a day off today, I was heading home anyway,” Yuta says with a smile, watching as your face lights up at the offer, his heart warming up at the sight.
“Oh, shit, Yuta, thank you so much. You are a lifesaver,” you smile, and he can feel the blush that’s creeping its way on his face.
“Don’t need to thank me, really, I’m just glad to help,” he responds in a gentle tone, voice growing more concerned as he looks over you again. “Are you cold?”
“A little, I really wasn’t expecting this.”
“Well, I,” he pauses, unsure if he should stay what he is thinking before he decides to go for it anyway. “I can give you my hoodie, so you don’t have to walk back while cold.”
Yuta looks over you, hand tugging at the fabric of the white hoodie he was wearing. He is pretty sure he is blushing, but he can’t focus on that right now. On one hand, you were cold, and he really just wanted to help. But on the other, well he is pretty sure that if you accept, he is gonna have the image of you in that hoodie burned into his mind forever.
“Oh, you don’t need to do that, you are gonna feel cold,” you shake your head, chuckling as you wave one hand in front of your face.
“I’m not that cold anyway, it’s fine really,” he insists, looking into your eyes with a warm smile.
You hesitate for a second, but then you nod, muttering a thanks when he places his backpack and umbrella on the floor. Yuta reaches a hand to his back, fingers digging into the soft fabric of his hoodie as he starts pulling it off. When he wrangles himself off of it, he passes it to you with one hand, the other fighting to readjust his hair.
He watches you smile and put it on, his heart skipping a beat at the sight. The shoulders of the hoodie seem a little loose on your frame, the end of the sleeves just about reaching your fingers. Yuta wasn’t that much bigger than you, but yeah, this was good enough. The walk to your apartment would be short, but he caught himself wondering if maybe he’d be lucky, and by the end of it his hoodie would smell like you.
When you look back up at him, he quickly averts your eyes, busying himself with picking up his backpack and umbrella, getting ready to leave. You two walk and chat, shoulders touching as you share the protection of Yuta’s old umbrella. He is almost sad when the walk ends. The minute he is inside his room, hoodie back in his hands, he brings the piece of clothing to his nose. Under the faint notes of his cologne, he finds it, the sweet smell of your body lotion. He’d for sure be sleeping with that hoodie tonight.
The second time Yuta got a chance to see you wearing one of his clothes was when you’d taken him with you to that bar you loved so much - Devilock, you called it. From the outside the place looked like a shady, hole in the wall type of bar, from the inside it looked just better enough to be sanitary. Truth be told, Yuta had never been one to frequent those places. Between the loud noise and his aversion for social situations, it felt like too much. Yet, he couldn’t say no when you invited him.
The punkest thing he could muster from his wardrobe was a beaten up plaid button up thrown open over a black shirt and some dark jeans. Compared to you, he was a normie, but that was the best he could do. Though, your presence made him feel a little less awkward when you entered the place. The bar wasn’t utterly packed, but it was full, and that was already enough stress, so Yuta would take whatever little solace he could get.
Still, there was a silver lining to this all - aside from the amount of people in the bar counter, forcing you two to sit side by side, shoulders pressed against each other. No, the silver lining was that he got to watch you, free and at ease in your own element, dancing in a skin tight shirt and jeans shorts. Yuta could endure the awkwardness he felt from not knowing how to dance if he got to see you like that.
Shit, you were too hot, and as you both returned to the bar he still couldn’t stop staring, even as you downed another drink, droplets of the cocktail spilling past your lip and down your neck. Maybe the alcohol helped you not notice his wondering eyes, but the bartender sure caught his stares. From behind the counter, the tall, long haired man looked like serious trouble, especially as his black locks shadowed those fox eyes when he leaned menacingly forward. Okay, that was enough to make Yuta look away, for now. Near the end of the night, however, something else happened that had butterflies working up a hurricane in his stomach.
“Yuta!”
When you cried out for him, he could already recognize something off in your voice. You’d both found your way to the arcade machines in the bar at that point, and Yuta felt a little more in his territory this way. Though, you had gone to get a drink for yourself, and it was really off putting to have you return with worry in your voice.
“Hey,” Yuta responded, calling out your name as he turned around. “Everything ok?”
“Ah, mostly,” you chuckled. “But I think my shirt snagged in someone’ jacket and one of the straps torn,” you gave another awkward chuckle and Yuta’s eyes went straight from your own to the hand tightening the knot holding your shirt strap together - the other hand clutching a beer.
“Shit,” he stuttered, torn between the desire to help and the desire to just see the thing fall. “People should really be more careful, they could have hurt you.”
“It’s ok, really, it’s just an inconvenience,” you laughed softly, placing your beer on top of the arcade machine you were. “Tho’, I think I might have to inconvenience you now.”
“Y-yes, whatever you need,” it was almost shameful how fast Yuta responded, he knew it, but he just couldn’t help but jump at the idea of you needing him in any way.
“Could you lend me your shirt? I’m not sure how safe this knot is,” you chuckled.
Yuta froze for a moment at your words, voice muffled by the song playing. Though, he quickly snapped out of it, eager to see you in his shirt. He knew he should be more worried about you, he knew he shouldn’t be thinking as he was at that moment, but there was just something about seeing you in his clothes. Shit, he’d refuse to wash that shirt for the next few days.
Taking out the shirt in a rush as he nodded frantically, Yuta almost knocked down the beer bottle on top of the arcade machine, getting one arm pathetically stuck in the sleeve as he tugged it free. When he handed you the shirt, you thanked him, swiftly putting it on and buttoning it up. You looked gorgeous in it - as you did in absolutely anything, but there was a special charm to this particular sight. Fuck, he could feel his cock hardening already.
The rest of the night goes by uneventfully - although not exactly easily. Yuta had to spend the whole time fighting his own desires and the erection that threatened to sprung up and make things a lot more awkward. When you both finally get back home and return the shirt to his hands, he almost feels desolated. Almost, because the chance to sleep with a piece of clothing that smells like you again is enough to have him in high spirits.
The third time Yuta gets to see you in one of his clothes is in a more permanent situation. One he admits he lucked out on, a bold strike of fortune he will be forever thankful for. After you first moved in, you requested to share the space of his large office - the only spare room in the apartment. He agreed, obviously, he couldn’t say no to you, so he just let you set up your easel and materials in the office, but in the beginning it was awkward. Overtime, though, he grew comfortable in your presence - and learned to watch you paint from the occasional reflections on his monitor.
Besides, Yuta couldn’t say he didn’t enjoy the sight of you working on your pieces. Although you could be a powerful distraction, sitting in front of your easel, wearing only small shorts and an old shirt - even this casual, you were gorgeous. At times, it was an exercise in self control, one he didn’t always win, forcing Yuta to take breaks from his work just to leave the room. Still, he wasn’t really complaining.
One day he catches you frowning while looking at the washing machine, browns pulled together and shoulders slumped. When he asks you what's wrong, you pull a torn up garment from inside the machine - from the gray color and paint stains he recognizes it as the remains of your old work shirt. As you mumble about needing to retire another t-shirt to put in its place, an idea crosses Yuta’s mind.
He sees a chance, and he has to take it - or at least try to, while he is feeling brave enough for the task. Sure, if this goes right, you are going to become even more of a distraction than you already are, but fuck it if he cares right now. So as you sigh in frustration, he is quick to offer you to take one of his t-shirts, claiming he has an old one he was gonna start using as pajamas anyway. When you seem hesitant, he doesn't give you time, stepping into his room fast and bringing you a white oversized t-shirt that he places in your hands, insisting you take it.
“Yuta,” he glances at you through the reflection as you call for him, seeing you turn from the easel towards him, “you sure I can use this? It feels so nice, the paint is just gonna destroy it.”
Yuta feels beyond lucky that on the very next day, he'd already gotten to see you wearing his shirt. Though, it's posing a slight inconvenience as now he's having to try and answer you without fully turning his chair around - lest you notice something you shouldn't. He turns just enough to glance at you, body still turned to his screens, anything below the hips mostly covered by the blessed shadow of his desk.
“I told you it's fine. Is it comfortable? If you like it, you can just keep it,” he shrugs, trying to act nonchalant about the whole thing. “This shirt is old, and it was nothing special to begin with.”
He lies straight through his teeth, the plain white shirt had been an expensive one - you'd probably just never know because he'd removed the tags long ago, they always pinched his skin. But he didn't mind that, not one bit, no price could pay for the sight before him. The oversized t-shirt went all the way down to just below your ass, covering a third of your thighs. Better yet, it almost swallowed your shorts, and from certain angles, it looked like you were wearing just the t-shirt. Wearing just his t-shirt. Yeah, he didn't mind the price tag.
You look into his eyes for a long second - a stare down Yuta is driven to win, despite the growing discomfort for every moment he had to spend holding his gaze into yours. But it was for a good cause, at least from the point of view of his own selfish desires. When you hum and look down, he holds his breath in anticipation.
“Ah, it is really comfortable,” you trail off, glancing at him again before shrugging, Yuta finally letting go of the breath he was holding. “Guess if you say so, thanks Yuta, you are a lifesaver!”
You cheerfully thank him with a bright smile and a sweet chuckle, stretching your arms above your head before going back to work. Yuta can feel his face burning, and he can only hope it doesn't look as red as it feels. You are too sweet, too cute - and it's not helping at all the sick images running in the back of his mind. Oh, how he wanted to have you sprawled on his bed wearing only that shirt, oh the things he wanted to do.
Fuck, now he could feel his pants straining already. Just as he imagined, this was worse than before - though, it was still a price worth paying to see you in his shirt almost every day. If he could have it his way, you'd only wear his clothes around the apartment anyway.
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Idk where the art is someone drop the art credit in the comments 🙌😜
Small Encounters
Itadori Yuji x Reader
!Basketball College AU!
After accidentally running into Nobaras Friend, a small interest
sparks between the two college students.
1/?
☆*:.｡. o(First Small Encounter)o .｡.:*☆
10:47 AM
Nobara : Y/nnnnnnnnn
Y/n : ?
Nobara : Come to the basketball game with me pleaseee I don’t wanna come alone☹️☹️
Y/n : What time and where
Nobara : Girl. Literally it’s been promoted everywhere. literallt where all the games happen duhhh and it’s at 7. Be ready at 6
Y/n : Dude i never even said yes but okay text me when ur on ur way. my classes end at 4 so i could’ve have time to get ready
Nobara : Okay i’ll see u then love u 😘😘
You place your phone down on your nightstand, sluggishly rolling your body out of bed. You put on you slippers and walk to the bathroom to do your morning routine. Classes didn’t start till 1:30 so you had some time to get ready and eat.
^Itadori POV^
“Nobara did you ask her” Itadori had the same morning class as Kugisaki. He whined to her as he laid his head down onto her desk.
“Yes now give me money.” Itadori had always thought you was pretty. They had attended some of the same parties this year since he had mutual friends with you. After finding out Kugisaki is close friend with you, he used it to his advantage. Using every chance he got to try seeing you more often.
^Y/n POV^
After putting on a decent outfit you headed to the front door of your apartment and slipped on your shoes. Looking at the time in your phone. It was exactly 12. Still an hour and a half till your class started, you went to the nearest cafe to get a snack and some Drink before heading to class.
You walked to the cafe, not driving since the cafe was only a couple minutes away. Passing some clothing stores, taking a glance inside you see your friend shopping.
“Nobara I thought you had class” You Walked into the store and approaching the brown haired girl.
“I did but i left early, I couldn’t deal with my friend, He’s such a headache.” Kugisaki massaged her temples. Linking her arm with yours before walking out of the store. “That store has no cute clothes, it’s all old lady clothes.”
“That’s not nice, I thought some of the shirts were cute.” She eyed you before continuing to walk. “I’m gonna go grab a coffee, wanna come with?”
“Sure! You’re paying though.I paid last time we went out and I’m broke right now”
You opened the door to the cafe for her. All tall figure comes behind you grabbing the door, their arm above your head, now holding the door open for you. You thanked them before walking in, already seeing Nobara looking at the menu. She turned around, her facial expression turning into an annoyed look.
“Yuji what are you doing here.” Looking up at the pink haired boy. You watched them interact then looking at the menu to decide what you wanted to get.
“I was just walking by and I saw you and your gorgeous friend and yea. What are you guys getting? Have any recommendations?” Itadori was now standing right next to you. Standing way too close. Ignoring his presence and the conversation he was having with you friend, you kept on looking at the menu before getting your body yanked to the side by Nobara.
“Leave us alone Yu, she doesn’t wanna give you a “recommendation” you don’t even drink this type of stuff. You only like energy drinks” Nobara seemed annoyed by his sudden appearance. You noticed Nobara getting protective over you, questioning it.
“You’re such a meanie Nobara, I just wanted to try something new.” The pink haired guy walked towards you, standing in front of you. “Hey my name is Itadori Yuji.”
“Hello, I’m L/n F/n” He extended his hand to shake yours. Which you hesitantly shook. “Is he the “headache” from your class?” You turned over to Kugisaki, rolling her eyes at Yuji.
“Yes that’s him. Now you see why he’s a headache?” Yuji clutched his sweater, pretending to be overly offended by her words.
“Such a meanie, this is why no guy likes you.” Itadori said teasingly, he averted his gaze back to you. “She’s so mean to me for no reason. I’m so cool in my opinion, I have cool hair, I do cool stuff, and I’m funny. Right?” He stared at you, waiting for a response.
“I mean I don’t even know you but yea?” You didn’t know what to say, you haven’t even had a conversation with him before but he does seem like a cool person to you. You walked to the register and ordered your drink.Kugisaki ordered hers and right after Itadori ordered his. Catching you off guard, knowing you had to pay for his drink now too. You let it slide since you didn’t want to seem rude.
Grabbing your wallet out of your bag, you look up to see Itadori had already paid for it. ‘what a gentleman’
The three of you waited for your drinks, stand in to the side as Itadori and Kugisaki argued about anything and everything. Hearing your order be called, you all grabbed your drinks before heading out the doors.
“Hey L/n what time does your class start at? It’s 1:18, we should go do something.” Itadori glanced at you, watching your expression change.
“Oh shit, class starts in 12 minutes. And the walk is pretty far. Bye guys It was nice meeting you Itadori!” You quickened your pace. Saying your goodbye and thanking Itadori for paying for the drinks.
“Hold up! My car is right over there, I’ll just drive you to campus.” He jogged to you, matching the same pace as you. Leaving Kugisaki all alone. She turned around and went in her own direction, towards all the clothing stores.
“Are you sure? I don’t want to be a burden to you. I can just walk it’s fine.”
“It’s not fine. Going late is bad L/n, and don’t call yourself a burden. Don’t worry I’ll just take you.”
He grabbed the keys out of his pocket before leading the way to his car. You arrived to the parking garage where he stationed his car. An all black 2015 GT Ford Mustang, he opened the passenger door for you, you dipped into the car. The interior was mostly black leather with some red accents.
"Your car is sick Itadori." You watch him get into the drivers side, putting on the seat belt before starting the car. A low pur coming out of the engine. You smiled to yourself, you were never a car girl but you did enjoy cars, especially going fast.
"Thanks, if we take the long way, we can get onto the highway and I'll show you how fast it goes." Itadori changes the gears of the car before rolling out of the parking garage.
"I'm so down but maybe another day, my class is almost starting. Thank you though." You glance down at your phone to check the time you had 7 minutes till class started. You might be a little late but that wasn't a big issue.
You arrive to the school campus 4 minutes. The car ride over to the campus was pleasant, you held a small conversation with the pink haired boy and got to know more about him. He told you about his dreams and ambitions, how he wanted to become an all star basketball player some day, moving to the states to pursue his career after he finished college.
"Thank you so much Itadori, it was a pleasure meeting you!" You hoped out of the car, slightly bowing your head in a form of gratitude towards the man. You left some money in the console of his car, he did pay for the coffee and gave you a ride to school.
"No problem seriously, what time does your class end at by the way?" A few cars that were behind him started honking their horn since he was blocking the way.
"It ends at 4. People are honking at you, you should get going." You laugh a little at him as you closed the door, Itadori lowered the window of the door down. He rolls his eye playfully at you as he begins to put his car in first gear.
"Alright, I'll pick you up. Just meet me near the music building." His car started move slowly, you quickly started following the cars pace. Placing your hand on the ledge of the door. You glare your eyes at him.
"You are not picking me up, you already done so much for me, bye Itadori." You walk away from the car, waving at him over your shoulder and start walking to your class.
"We'll see about that!" He yells out of the car window before speeding off. You walk up the stairs to your first class, arriving a couple minutes late. Taking a seat in the back next to an acquaintance, Ogami Hinata.
"So, you and Itadori a thing?" Your eyes pop out your head as you face the black haired girl.
"Excuse me?" You're extremely taken aback from this comment. You had just met the guy and people already assume your dating! You thought to yourself he relationship with Itadori. Maybe she was a crazy ex girlfriend.
"I mean he dropped you off and you guys were laughing and smiling. Do you like him." She glared at you, "Many girls would kill to be in your position, including me! Just imagine Itadori driving me to school." She covered her face and blush tainted her ivory cheeks. "You're so lucky!"
You don't respond to her, not knowing what to say you leave the conversation as is, letting silence take over.
Class came to an end faster than you expected. You step out of the music building and to your surprise you see Itaadori's all back Mustang parked.
Notes - Sorry this was so rushed, should i continue this small ff?😜
#jujutsu kaisen#yuji itadori#jjk itadori#itadori x reader#jjk x reader#x reader#nobara kugisaki#jjk nobara#college#basketball#jjk#itadori x y/n#voidimwrites
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I'm Going to Paint Your Heart Yellow!
Pairing: Lee Seokmin x f!Reader
Warnings: Going Ranger au, kindergarten teacher reader, fluff, toxic relationship, grumpy reader, sunshine seokmin, tiny bit angst.
Word count: 5.3k+
Summary: When a grumpy teacher meets a sweet ranger, an unlikely pair. What will happen when one fall in love with the other? Will they find their mutual standing?
“I’m going to paint your hearts yellow. Going Yellow!”
You simply did not expect this. How could you? This scene is straight out of the cartoons you watched during childhood. Who would have thought that power rangers are actually real living people and their headquarters are next door to your workplace.
You watched, in utter confusion as the six-man team stood before the class of 4 year olds, introducing themselves ‘enthusiastically’ without a hint of embarrassment coloring their faces. Oh, actually one person does looked ashamed of what he’s doing and wishes the ground would swallow him whole. His eyes met yours and the tip of his ears burnt brighter red as he looked away immediately. The secondhand embarrassment you’re getting from this is unreal.
“Seokminieeeee~” a girl cheered. The man who’s hair is dark orange, wearing the uniform jacket with yellow detailing smiled sweetly and waved at her. Oh, he’s cute. You noted.
“That is not Seokminie. That is Going Yellow!” a boy argued.
“Its Seokminie!” the girl argued.
“Going Yellow!”
The banter is going back and forth, it’s going to become chaos soon. The rangers were trying to calm them but they made it worse because more kids started to join the fights. You stood up straight, cleared your throat loud enough for the kids to hear. Immediately, the children went silent.
“Kids, the rangers made their time to come see you today. Are you going to fight? Should I ask them to leave so you could fight instead?” you asked, voice firm.
“No…” they chorused.
“Is everyone going to behave now? So that Mr. Rangers can continue?” you asked again.
“Yes, teacher,” they answered in unison.
“Good. Thank you” you calmly stated, aware that all eyes are on you but decided to just be cool about it despite panicking on the inside.
“Oh, This is Miss Kim Y/n. She’s our new teacher. But ever since she came it has been a lot easier to control the kids because she’s very strict but very kind at the same time” the principal, Madam Lee introduced you. You gave a slight bow to the men and they returned the gesture with an awed smile.
The rest of the day went well. The kids enjoyed the time they spent with the rangers and they seemed to share the same sentiment too. They went back to their office after lunch and the daycare quiet down since most of the kids had gone home with their family. It’s almost 7pm and one kid still hasn’t gone home yet. And you’re left alone with her after Madam Lee went home.
“Soojin-ah. Do you usually go home this late?” you asked as you began to pack up your things. The little girl who was coloring her book looked up at you and nodded.
“Usually, Madam Lee accompanies me because Seokminie gets off work at 8pm. Or sometimes it’s Teacher Seo who stayed behind. But there are days when mom came to pick me up earlier too. But now mom is on a business trip” she explained cutely, her hands flailing everywhere as if to emphasise her story.
“Seokminie?” you asked, sure that you heard that name before.
“My uncle. He is Going Yellow. He worked next door” she cheered. You smiled at her cuteness so you bend down to pat her head. You took a seat next to her to see her coloring book and was genuinely impressed to see it was so neat and tidy. Usually kids her age have a very messy art style.
“So today, I'll be the one to accompany you. Is that okay with you?”
“Okay!! But I’m super hungry right now hehe” she giggled cutely. You noticed she has the same smile as her uncle, it was very bright and innocent that they’re able to melt anyone’s misery right away.
“Oh no… That’s bad but I don’t have any food on me right now. Should we go to the convenience store nearby? It will be my treat. But we’ll have to let your uncle know first, in case he comes here to search for you” you suggested after you rummaged through your bag for any snack you could find.
“Is that really okay?” the girl asked again, she was very polite for her age, you could not help falling for her even more.
“Of course. But it will be our secret only okay?” you chuckled, holding out your pinky for her to hold. She beamed, immediately jumping to her feet to lock her tiny pinky with yours. You helped her to pack her things before locking up the school to head to the Ranger Headquarters next door, hand-in-hand with Soojin.
“Annyeonghasaeyoooo~” the little girl announced as soon as they stepped into the cold office. There was the pink ranger from earlier and he immediately beamed upon seeing the little girl.
“Aigoo, it's Soojinnie. Are you looking for Seokmin?” he asked, kneeling to be on the same eye-level as her. He gave you a polite nod and a smile, acknowledging your presence next to her.
“Eung. Is he here, Hao-samchon? I want to ask him if I can go to the convenience store with my teacher because I’m hungry” she pouted.
“Aigoo, why are you going to the convenience store if you’re hungry? Stay here, I’m cooking dinner right now” another voice piped in from behind you, startling you. The figure appeared, stopping next to the pink ranger, grinning at the girl before turning to look at you. He’s wearing the same jacket as ‘Hao’ as Soojin mentioned but you haven’t seen him before. He is super tall, towering over your frame, with long hair framing his attractive face with a box of groceries in his arms.
“Soojinnie? You’re here?” Seokmin’s voice called from behind you yet again. You both turned to look at him who also had a box of groceries in his arms.
“Seokminieeeee. I’m hungry. I wanna go to the convenience store with my teacher. May I?” she asked, giving him her cutest puppy eyes. Seokmin turned to look at you for confirmation and you nodded.
“I can even leave my things here if you’re wary of me,” you stated. He immediately looked guilty because his eyes went wide as saucers.
“No! It’s not that! Of course I trust you. You’re hired by her school after all” he panicked.
“Just eat here. We’re having dinner” the taller guy said.
“But I’m suuuuuupeeerrr hungryyyyy noooowwww” Soojin whined, enhancing her pout even more.
“How about we go buy some snacks first while you’re cooking then I’ll send her back here for dinner” you suggested.
“You’re staying for dinner too” all the other four stated in unison and you’re left speechless.
“Are you okay just going alone with your teacher? Because I need to go cook. What do Soojinnie want to eat?” Seokmin asked her niece.
“I’ll behave. I want to eat tteokbokki please?” she asked nicely. You almost coo, but held yourself back when the uncle coos at his niece first. He nodded, and let you take his niece away as the both of you trotted to the nearby Family Mart.
“I’ll introduce you again. We have 2 teams. Each teams consists of 6 people and there’s 2 doctors. This is my teammates in Division 1. Our leader, Red is Lee Chan, he’s the youngest by the way. White is Hong Jisoo, Blue is Choi Seungcheol, Pink Xu Minghao, Black Jeon Wonwoo and Yellow is me, Lee Seokmin. For Division 2, Red is Boo Seungkwan, Blue is Chwe Hansol, White is Yoon Jeonghan, Black is Kwon Soonyoung, Yellow is Wen Junhui and Pink is Kim Mingyu. This is our founder Dr. Woo or his real name, Lee Jihoon and his assistant, Hong Yeseung, Wonwoo’s girlfriend. Did you get it?” Seokmin explained as if he’s shooting a rapping bullet through your brain at dinner and you blinked nervously, not getting anything at all.
“She obviously doesn’t get anything with that kind of explanation” Dr. Woo commented.
“It’s okay. Let’s take time to get to know each other. We’re neighbours after all. We’ll see each other a lot” Chan nodded in assurance.
“Aigoo, look at you trying to be the leader” Seungkwan sassed. The rest of the team laughed at their banter and you chuckled, feeling strangely at ease with the lively bunch.
“What’s your name? Seokmin only tell you ours. But not yours. What should we call you?” the sole female, Yeseung asked kindly.
“Y/n. My name is Kim Y/n,” you replied.
“Nice to meet you, Y/n” she chuckled.
It actually doesn’t take long at all to get along really well with them all, considering your nightly routine to drop Soojin at the rangers’ office and staying over a bit to chat with Yeseung while babysitting the girl as she wait for her uncle to finish work. Your work hours are supposed to end at 6pm and it was supposed to be rotational to stay with other teachers but you offered to stay back with her everyday because the other teachers has their own family to tend to, and you’re the only single teacher plus you have a tiny weeny crush on the girl’s uncle but of course you weren’t going to admit that. It’s funny how hard you were trying to hide that but some of them already seemed to notice your crush on the yellow ranger, well except the man himself of course.
It was children day’s celebration, the school decided to work together with the rangers to organize a mini picnic day for the children. The event will be held at the Rangers’ training grounds because their spaces are bigger and can fit more people. Parents are invited to join the picnic but since it was held on a working day, not many could attend.
You were helping around when you noticed the red rangers bicker with each other which color of mats suits the theme the best. Hansol, the blue ranger from Division 2 was standing in between the both of them with a blank expression plastered across his face. In his hands, he was holding red and blue mats as he waited for them to decide which one he should lay on the grass for guests to sit on. You sigh, reaching for yellow mats silently and began laying them on the grass, leaving a bit space in between so that it will be easier to walk around. Hansol noticed what you were doing, and promptly leaving the two to help you lay more yellow mats in silence. He was slow on his actions but you didn’t mind because he was still helping nonetheless.
“We’re using yellow?” Seokmin’s voice was heard behind you, very loud and excited and you had to hold yourself from screaming in shock at his sudden appearance.
“Yellow? I thought we’re using red?!” Seungkwan questioned, looking shocked at how many mats you and Hansol had placed around the venue.
“We’ll be having this picnic next week if I let Hansol wait for your decision on which color to use. Plus, I’m hungry already” you stated, unamused. Seokmin snorted while Seungkwan scoffed at your audacity but he didn’t say anything and just gifted you with his bombastic side eye which you’d get on a daily basis already.
“You did’t have breakfast today?” Seokmin asked, ever the gentlest one– looking at you with his doe eyes. It was so hard to maintain a blank face when you just want to coo at his cuteness but, you’re a cool lady, so a facade is a must.
“I overslept and rushed here without my morning drip” you grunted a bit and he just chuckled at your respond.
“Come with me, there’s some of the meat that’s already cooked. You can eat that first. Jisoo made some coffee too,” he beamed, grasping your sleeve covered wrist and tugging you gently to follow him to the grill. You had to fight the blush that is trying to creep up your face at that intimate gesture but it certainly doesn’t help when you see the knowing looks your friends sent you. Mingyu was holding back his snicker by flaring his nose as he grilled the meat, Yeseung was hiding her grin behind the paper cup that she had been sipping on for the past 15 minutes. Meanwhile, Yoon Jeonghan doesn’t even bother to hide his smirk while his evil twin is beaming at you with his ‘angelic’ smile.
“Do you prefer beef or samgyeopsal?” Seokmin asked, letting go of your wrist only to pull a paper bowl to fill your food as he stared at you with those innocent eyes again.
“Beef” you mumbled and Jeonghan who was grilling the beef quickly placed some in the bowl as he giggled evilly, his eyebrows going crazy as he looked at you. You moved back to stand slightly behind Seokmin as you glared at him, mouthed ‘be quiet’ but the older guy only laughed more, happy to tease you. Seokmin was puzzled, to see his friend acting like that so he turned back to look at you, but you had your blank face on again.
“Why are you so happy?” he questioned innocently.
“Ah, no. I’m so happy that Teacher Y/n wants to eat my cooking~” he laughed evilly with his signature deep giggles.
“Of course she'd want to eat your cooking, you're the best at grilling beef!” Seokmin beamed and you almost threw away the bowl and kissed him stupid.
The picnic started soon after, parents and students filling up the venue, talking and playing with each other. You were just sitting by the coffee counter with Jisoo and Yeseung when a familiar child came running to you.
“Teacher! Come eat with me and my family. Mommy and granny want to meet you,” she beamed up at you while pointing towards where her family is seated. They were easy to spot, as there was a head of dark orange amongst the dark hair.
“Go ahead and join your family” Jisoo mused, his eyes gone as he beamed while his sister nodded along. Sometimes you didn't know if they were teasing you or genuinely happy for you but you had to remind yourself that the Hongs are the most mischievous among the bunch (plus Yoon Jeonghan) so you have to be careful not to be pulled away by them.
You let Soojin guide you to her family, her mother and grandma greeted you with a warm welcome and the man you've been crushing on silently is smiling so brightly it's almost blinding.
“You seemed awfully happy today. Did something good happen, Seokmin? Grandma Lee asked her youngest son.
“Jiwon is back from Canada. And she's coming today, I'm waiting for her right now. Hehe” he answered with a sheepish smile. You could see his sister and mother glancing at each other in concern before turning to look at their youngest again.
“Jiwon? Didn't you two break up already?” His sister asked.
“We did. But Jiwon texted me last week to fix our relationship. So, I agreed”
The atmosphere is tense and you could hear your ears ringing from the knowledge of Seokmin having a girlfriend and you might have been rejected before you even got the chance to confess.
Not longer than 15 minutes after that, Seokmin got up from his sitting position to fetch someone at the gate of the headquarters. He came back, a few minutes later with a woman probably in the same age range as you guys– hand in hand.
The girl took a seat next to you, who had Soojin resting on your lap. She eyed you suspiciously before turning to her boyfriend.
“Who's this? I haven't seen her before?” She questioned.
“Ah, this is Y/n, Soojin’s teacher. She's a close friend now considering she's always there to accompany Soojin while I get off work. Y/n, this is my girlfriend, Jiwon” Seokmin explained, the bright smile never leaving his handsome face.
“Hello, Jiwon,'' you greeted politely, only to receive a frown and half-hearted nod in response. You were quite taken aback by this behavior until you saw Seokmin's sister rolled her eyes in annoyance but didn't say anything else whilst mother only smiled at the new girl.
Jiwon is a brat, you noted.
For the whole day, the girl next to you has been clinging to her boyfriend as if to show off to you that he belongs to her and hers only. You got tired of it eventually and excused yourself to go back to your friends.
“How was it? Their family is nice, right?” Yeseung asked, when she noticed you're back– handing you a cup of iced coffee to soothe your thirst.
“Yeah. But someone isn't”
“Who?”
“Jiwon”
“That bitch came back?” Yeseung questioned, her eyes blazing now.
“You knew her?”
“Well yeah, I punched her in the face once because she was trying to take advantage of my Wonu,” she muttered and you gasped.
“What?! Holy hell, you punched her? What did she do?”
“Well… She sprained her ankle and I asked Wonu to help her because Seokmin wasn't around. And then, she started flirting with him suddenly, when Seokmin came back, she accused Wonu of trying to harass her. Yeah, and I did that”
“Damn… Did Seokmin get mad?” You inquired.
“He did. He was upset with me for hurting his girlfriend but he knew I wouldn't lie and Wonu wouldn't do that to her. So, yeah, he apologized the next day,” Yeseung sighed. You looked back at the couple who were laughing together and sigh.
The days after that passed by normally, you still stayed late to accompany Soojin as you always do, talking and joking around with the rangers including Seokmin occasionally. It was really a big change for you. Truthfully, when you learned that your crush has someone else you'd immediately cut things off with them and run away.
But you found yourself unable to do that to the Yellow Ranger. Not when you see how happy he is to be telling you how his days went by, how happy he looked when he said his girlfriend likes his cooking and how cheerful he is after she came back. Not that he wasn't cheerful before, it's just all of you could see how he's happier now, that he's bouncing in every step he takes.
You didn't know how you could see this even brighter side of him was due to someone else and not you. Maybe you overestimated yourself, because the world does not revolve around you and you absolutely do not have the power to make everyone happy. But a part of you did hope that this unrequited love would be requited anyways, what a wishful thinking.
You were surprised that you didn't run away this time, and you didn't feel as bitter as you did when you were rejected. Maybe your heart really was painted yellow by the ranger, and that is why you're still here, wishing him happiness with his girlfriend. And he'd look at you with his brightest smile, cheeks bunching cutely, eyes gone, nose scrunched as he thanked you.
But today, Seokmin wasn't at his office when you came over at tea time to pass the muffins that you and your class baked. Mingyu had told you he went out with a sullen look on his face earlier. It was raining heavily outside, and you were worried that he didn't have his umbrella with him.
You run around the neighborhood, only to see a familiar figure crouching down behind the concrete tunnel at the playground in the rain.
“Seokmin? What are you doing here? It's raining” you asked as you carefully came up to him. He was still crouching, eyes downcast as his hands held waterproof cardboard over a puppy lying down on the ground.
“This puppy, he's dead. I- I always feed him but I was a bit late today be-because–” he sobbed, still staring at the lifeless puppy below. You crouched next to him, covering his head with the umbrella you brought even though he's already drenched and your heart broke at the sight of him, face wet with tears and raindrops, a frown and pout decorating his handsome face.
It was the first time you saw him cry, because he's always the one who comforts others, always puts others before himself.
If he's the one who always offers his shoulders to anyone who's sad, who offers their shoulders to him when he's upset?
“Do you need a hug?” You offered silently, opening your arms for him. Seokmin pouted even more before nodding and slowly moving to bury his face in your shoulder, and wrapping his arms around your torso as he sobbed sadly. You patted him on his back in a comforting manner, just listening to him crying his heart out for who knows how long.
“Sorry, I've wetted your sweater with my tears…” he mumbled as pulled away from you after he calmed down a bit.
“It's fine. Are you feeling okay now?” You asked with a soft smile.
“Yeah, thanks. But you're all wet too now! I'm so sorry!” He panicked again upon seeing half of your body was wet from the rain too. Your skirt was drenched, same as your shoes and socks.
“Hey, it's fine. I have spare clothes back at school. You've been in the rain longer than I am. We should probably get inside now or else we'll be sick. Come on,” you stood up, offering your hand for him to take. He did, and you walked together to find a box to place the puppy so that he can bring him to the pet crematorium at the end of the block later.
You didn't ask anything to him, it wasn't your place to be nosy of his affairs even though you're dying to know why his members said he's so sullen today.
“I had a fight with Jiwon,” he said out of nowhere when you both were watching the process of the cremation of the little puppy.
“Ah, I see. No wonder Mingyu said you looked sullen today. It's okay you can always talk and fix–”
“She wanted me to quit my job as a ranger,” he added and cut you off. You gasped, but didn't say anything to let him continue.
“I mean, I was fine if she didn't want me to raise the puppy at my apartment because she's always there. But telling me to quit my job just because Yeseung and Wonu are there and you're next door is a bit overreacting, don't you think so?”
“Me?”
“Yeah, Jiwon knows we're close to each other. I told her that you're my closest friend next to my members and she didn't like it. She was mad and we argued. She should've known that I love my job very much and she should have just supported me even if she didn't like it but forcing her decision on me is unacceptable,” he complained but all you could hear was ‘you’re my closest friend next to my members’.
The way he rejected you whilst being so unaware about it was so unreal that it stopped being funny to you.
“Yeah, she should have respected your opinions instead of forcing her beliefs on you” you muttered weakly as a response. You both walked back to the headquarters in silence only to hear screaming on the foyer.
“Jiwon?” Seokmin called out. The woman turned towards where you both stood at the gate and she rushed towards you to push at your shoulders violently, making you stumbled back.
“You bitch! Why are you with him?! What did you do?!” she screamed at your face.
“Jiwon, why are you being like this? Y/n was just accompanying me to send off the puppy that I always fed” Seokmin explained, trying to get his girlfriend off of you.
“That damn dog again?! How many times do I have to tell you? It's disgusting!” Jiwon yelled. You grabbed her by the collar, irritated at her constant yelling.
“Shut your trap. You're making a scene” you warned, voice low and demanding.
“And who are you to tell me anything?! Oh, you're ashamed that people are gonna know you're an ugly bitch who's trying to steal someone's boyfriend?!”
“No one's ashamed of anything and no one's stealing anyone. Calm down, Jiwon. Listen to me, please” Seokmin pleaded, pulling his girlfriend away from your grasp.
“Why are you siding with her? Did you actually like her?!” Jiwon shouted.
“I am honestly stunned. How did a guy who's so nice like him ended up with someone crazy like you? Did you put a spell on him or something?” You sighed exasperatedly, before snickering at her in a mocking manner. You've lost your cool. Your anger is blazing right now.
“You called me crazy?! Who do you think you are!” She yelled yet again, splashing the cup of orange juice at your face in anger. The whole foyer was stunned, including Seokmin. No one dares to make a move or utter a thing.
“You should have been grateful that he's the nicest human being on earth, the purest and kindest to ever exist. You should have been kind and respectful towards him, treat him with care and so much love the way he treated his friends and you. The way he deserves. Honestly, he deserves so much better than a nasty piece of crap like you” you spat, venom lacing in your tone. Your eyes are glowering in rage, if looks could kill, the woman in front of you would have died more than a few times already.
“What? Do you think you're better than me? That you deserved him?!”
“I'm not. If I'm better than you, I wouldn't even be here entertaining your pathetic ass. I'd rather ignore your pitiful yapping and tend to him because right now, he needs comfort more than anything. But here I am, standing eye to eye with such an ungrateful bastard when my heart is burning with envy”
It was indirect confession, you realized it too late as you noticed Seokmin's eyes widening at your words. But, you'd rather tell him the truth now instead of seeing him getting hurt by this wench.
“You actually have feelings for him, you shameless bitch!” Jiwon screamed, lurching forward to give you a slap but you were faster. She staggered back, the sound of smack was deafening. All eyes landing on you.
“Stop trying to touch me with your filthy hands. It's disgusting” you spat, before walking away from the scene.
You didn't know how you ended up at Yeseung’s door after that, only staring mindlessly at Wonwoo who had a shocked expression seeing you there– drenched.
“Come on in, Yeseungie is inside” he ushered you in, closing the door behind him.
“Bub, Y/n is here. She needs you” the tall guy had said to his girlfriend who was inside the bedroom.
“Y/n?” Yeseung’s voice was heard before she emerges from the bedroom wearing matching headband and pajamas as her boyfriend.
“Oh my gosh you're drenched. You're gonna wet my floor. Off you go to wash up, I'll bring you a change of clothes” she huffed, pushing you off to the guest bathroom.
“Baby can you get us some snacks?” Yeseung said.
“Yeah, I'll leave them at the door later and I'll be at Soonyoung's place. Call me if you need me, okay? Love you, bub,”
“Wonu left. You can wash up and then we'll talk,”
You ended up crying the whole night, before running down with a fever. It was embarrassing, being heartbroken until you fell ill as if you're still in highschool. It was even more mortifying that your body decided to fall sick at Yeseung’s house– troubling the couple even more. But they didn't mind at all, nursing you back to health as if you're their child.
You saw Seokmin again the next school day and you tried your hardest not to just bolt away and listen to what he has to say instead. You guys decided to talk at a nearby cafe, with a cup of coffee and cakes.
“I broke up with Jiwon” he announced, capturing your attention. You didn't know what to respond to that, so he continues,
“Thank you for saying what you said that day. I was really thankful and grateful for that. What you said made me really happy. Knowing someone thinks highly of me is really comforting,”
“I wasn't the only one. All of us feel that way. All of us think very highly of you. You're the kind of person who deserves the whole world” you mumbled. Seokmin smiled warmly at your words, enough to make you flustered.
“And… I'm sorry I didn't realize that you've liked me for a long while already. Mingyu told me that I've been blind. It must've hurt a lot yeah? Listening to me talk about Jiwon all the time… I'm sorry…”
When his voice sounded sad, you whipped your head up to look at him, his smile gone with a pout decorating his handsome face.
“It's fine. You don't have to be sorry, I'm just glad to see you're happy is all”
“But I am upset that you said you didn't deserve me and you talked badly of yourself. Because to me, you are so caring and loving towards others even though your face is intimidating sometimes”
“I really like being around you, Y/n. You made me feel at ease and I know I can always be myself and count on you. So… will you please not run away and stay until… until I can learn to love you more than a friend does?” He asked, round eyes looking at you with hope. You looked away, trying to hide the blush that's creeping their way up your face but he took it the wrong way, immediately pleading.
“Did you not like me anymore, Y/n? Is it because of what Jiwon did to you last time? I'm sorry, please! I promise I'll learn my hardest even if I'm not the brightest student!” He panicked.
“Only for a short while. I'll stop liking you if you take too much time to learn” you muttered, still staring out of the window at the cats.
“I'll try my best!” He chirped excitedly. His smile came back, beaming at you brightly like the sun itself.
You lied. There's no way you would actually be able to stop liking him, because you're falling in love with him deeper every second you spend with this man. Because your heart has already been painted yellow by the ranger himself. Making you feel bright, easy going and fluttery ever since you met him.
I guess rangers do exist. And their powers actually work too. – you noted, staring at the man who was petting a cat rolling around on the pavement.
“Y/n, let's adopt him!” He quipped, looking up at you with thise shiny eyes again.
“You can adopt him, but why do you need my approval?” You asked.
“Are you not going to be my girlfriend later on? I'll need your approval if you're going to always come to my apartment,” he questioned.
“Have you taken your lesson seriously? I told you I'm not going to wait for long,” you sassed. He gasped, bouncing on his feet to stand up quickly with the cat in his arms. His brows furrowed as he stepped closer towards you with that cute pout again.
“I'm learning! I promise I am. Don't leave. You're not allowed to” Seokmin whined, his fingers curling around your wrist gently. You smiled.
“I'm kidding. I won't leave. You can paint my heart yellow again if I tried to,” you chuckled, pulling your hand away only to lace your fingers together with his.
It was his turn to blush now, even the tip of his ears burned bright red.
“I will! As many times as it takes!” He announced, squeezing your hands together. He looked so cute like this, it warms your heart. You both ended up laughing at your ridiculousness, walking hand-in-hand back to your workplace.
-Fin-
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Alyssa Vaughn
Pairing: Pre-established!Beck Oliver x Fem!Reader
Fandom: Victorious (Nickelodeon)
Summary: Based on the Victorious episode “Jade Dumps Beck” where you take the place of Jade. Some things are changed.
Warnings: Cursing
*******
“You know, they filter the fist pee out before we drink it,” you informed, sitting down at the lunch table between André and Beck.
André quirked an eyebrow. “How do they do that?”
You paused. “I-I don’t know.”
Beck hummed knowingly. “Exactly.” Just then, he got a text message. Beck moved to respond.
The only people you knew to text Beck were his family and your little friend group at Hollywood Arts, so your curiosity got the better of you. “Who’s that?”
Beck played it off unconvincingly. “Oh, just some girl from yoga.”
André asked the obvious question. “What’s her name?”
“Oh...you know...Alyssa...Vaughn.” He said her last name quickly as if he was hoping you and André wouldn’t notice.
You choked on your drink.
“Alyssa Vaughn? Seriously?” André beat you to the punch. “She’s famous! And hot!”
“You’re friends with Alyssa Vaughn?” you asked in a voice that sounded meeker than you wanted it to sound.
Beck nodded. “Yeah. Is that a problem?”
“No.” You shook your head. And you were telling the truth. Or at least you hoped you were.
Well, if it wasn’t a problem the, it sure became one soon enough.
Alyssa Vaughn would text Beck, your boyfriend at least five times a day for a week, unprompted. You didn’t say anything, but it annoyed you to no end. What annoyed you even more, however, was the fact that Beck seemed to have no problem with it.
“Listen, Alyssa Vaughn is just a friend,” Beck assured you one day in the hallway at school.
You weren’t buying it. “Yeah. A ‘friend’ who’s already sent you six text messages today...Seven,” you added with an extra annoyed tone when you heard Beck’s phone buzz.
He rolled his eyes. “You don’t know that’s her.”
“Is it?” you prompted.
He checked it. When he saw that it was, in fact, Alyssa Vaughn, Beck decided to change the subject a little. “Okay, let’s see if I understand you. Because you and I date, I can’t be friends with other girls?”
“You can be friends with all the girls you want! Just not this girl,” you clarified.
Again, he rolled his eyes. “Why not this girl?”
“Because she texts you 24/7...and she’s pretty and rich!”
“Oh, so that’s it. You just don’t want me being friends with pretty girls.”
“That’s not true!” you fought back. “Cat’s pretty. Tori’s got those cheekbones. Hell, I’m even fine with you and Jade! And you two used to date!”
Again, he rolled his eyes at you. “You just won’t let that go, will you?”
“That’s not what I--” you didn’t want to start another fight. “Just please. Drop Alyssa Vaughn.”
Beck reaffirmed his stance and looked at you dead in the eye. “Or what?”
“Or what?” You couldn’t believe what this was coming to.
Beck didn’t back down. “What’re you going to do if I keep talking to Alyssa Vaughn?”
You stood there for a moment, suddenly feeling very alone. You searched Beck’s eyes, looking for any hint of a joke, but finding nothing. You said the only thing that was left to be said. “I’m breaking up with you.”
“Fine by me.” There was no hesitation on Beck’s part.
“Fine.” You swallowed past the lump in your throat, and stormed away from Beck, ignoring the stares from everyone else in the hallway as you went.
Avoiding Beck was pretty easy, you realised. That had happened at the very end of the day, so you were in the clear then. The only class you had with Beck was Sikowitz’s, and that was in the second half of the day, so you were good until lunch.
You were perfectly happy sitting on your own at lunch, until André came and sat with you. You didn’t mind him being there either.
“Hey,” he greeted as he sat back down.
“Hey,” you greeted back.
You could actually see André cringe. “So, I heard about you and Beck.”
“And?”
“Nothing.”
A car horn sounded before any other awkwardness could transpire. You turned to see Alyssa Vaughn pull up in the Hollywood Arts’ parking lot with Beck in the passenger seat of her car. You could just make out Alyssa telling Beck, “You’re amazing, you know that?”
Before your teeth could break from clenching your jaw so hard, you figured it was best to get out of there.
André found you in the black box theater, alone, crying your eyes out.
“Hey, hey, sweet girl.” He sat down next to you and put an arm around your shoulder. “It’s okay.”
“No it’s not,” you cried, “I lost Beck and now he’s running around with freaking Alyssa Vaughn and I’m just...UGH!” You broke down even more and hid your face in André’s shoulder.
“Shh, shh. It’s okay, sweet girl. It’s okay,” André comforted.
“What the hell?” came a voice at the main entrance of the theater.
You were busy wrapped up in your own thoughts, so André was the first to see who it was. “Beck. I was just--”
“Just nothing. Get off her please.” Beck pushed sounding nothing like the guy you dated.
“Beck!” You jumped to your feet and put on a brave face. “What are you doing? André was comforting me.”
“Comforting you about what? You’re the one who broke up with me.”
“Stop it with your bullshit, Beck. You didn’t want to full-on cheat on me with Alyssa, so you made me break up with you. And now you’re parading her around here like some fucking trophy. Well, you won, Beck. Congratulations. The least you could do is let a friend comfort me while I wallow in self-pity.” At the end of your speech, you collapsed back in the chair you’d been sitting in. You let your head fall into your hands.
Somebody sat in the chair next to you.
“I am...so sorry,” Beck started. “I...don’t know what got into me. Someone famous was giving me attention, and I was thinking about my career. I lost sight of everything that I care about. I lost sight of you. You...are all that matters to me. I’m so sorry that I’ve been acting like this. Will you...Could you ever forgive me?”
You turned to look at him. Instinctively, your eyes darted down to his lips. You leaned in and kissed your ex-boyfriend.
“So...I think I’ll go now.” André took his leave.
You smiled against Beck’s lips.
Beck chuckled. “I missed you.”
“I missed you, too,” you leaned your head on his shoulder.
*******
Author’s Note: Thank you so much for reading! Fill up that heart and reblog if you liked it. I would also really appreciate a comment, if you have the time. If you would like to read more, check out my masterlist. Have a nice day, night, or whatever time it is for you! <3 <3 <3
#beck oliver#beck oliver x reader#victorious#victorious nickelodeon#avan jogia#companion jones#alyssa vaughn
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The Big Vision
Summary: Y/N and Dalton work on an art project together, but after a few hours they end up confessing their feelings for each other.
Word Count: 1.7k+
Warnings: fluff, language, arguing, mentions of the further
A/N: Hey! This is my very first Dalton fic so i really hope everyone likes it! pls feel free to let me know what you think, feedback is always appreciated!!
MASTELIST ✩ SEND ME A REQUEST
It was a rainy day on campus and Dalton was getting ready to work on his big art project with Y/N. Professor Armagan usually had students work on their art by themselves, but for the first time she thought it would be a great idea to have them work in pairs to create what she called: ‘one big vision’.
Once he was ready he gathered the art supplies they would need and left his building. Y/N’s dorm wasn’t too far away, they agreed to work there after Y/N reassured him her roommate wouldn’t be there. Not that he had anything against her, but he needed a lot of peace and quiet for a project like this. And he also would prefer to be alone with Y/N.
He thought about how much easier it would have been to work in his dorm, due to the fact that he didn’t have a roommate and had way more space, but since Dalton got possessed, Y/N had a harder time being there.
Y/N and Dalton have been friends pretty much since the first day of class, when they sat next to each other and Dalton caught her eying his painting instead of working on her own.
After a 10 minute walk, Dalton arrived at Y/N’s dorm. He knocked and waited a few seconds before she happily opened the door for him.
“Hey” She said with a big smile, taking a step back signaling Dalton to come in.
“Hi” He replied, stepping in and dropping his stuff in Y/N’s desk “I brought a few things we can use to get started today” Dalton informed her.
“Great” Y/N squeaked, looking through the things the tall one laid across her work station “I see you got some new brushes” She said, grabbing the mint condition box.
“Well yeah, I thought we might wanna try something different, at least for one of them”
“How are we gonna do this anyway?” Y/N questioned. The assignment was simple but tricky. They had to make two collaborative paintings, switching every 30 minutes to complete each other’s vision.
“I’m not sure” Dalton took a deep breath as he sat on one of the the chairs “We could start both paintings right now so we don’t waste time”
“Yeah, I think that would be the best idea” Y/N agreed “So different techniques for each one?”
“I guess” Dalton whispered, getting a few more things out of his bag.
Y/N could feel something was wrong, which was a little unsettling considering what had happened with him the month prior. She cared for his friend, and she wanted to ask him if everything was ok, she really did, but they also needed to get started as soon as possible.
They started to plan how they would actually do this, making rules to make sure they wouldn’t ruin a painting and discussing the techniques and supplies they would use for each canvas. After deciding on everything, they finally got started, each grabbing a canvas and setting a 30 minute timer.
The first two rounds were slow, not much happening on the canvases but their proguess started showing after the first hour. They kept working and switching paintings for two more hours, until Dalton’s eyes were too heavy to fully concentrate on their project.
Dalton sighed as he fell down onto Y/N’s bed. It had been nearly a month since he closed the door and things have been a lot better. His relationship with his dad, his fear of the dark, his nightmares, he didn’t even project as much anymore. It seemed like everything was finally going his way. Except for one thing.
“You look tired” Y/N said, eyes still focusing on the canvas in front of her.
“I am tired” Dalton replied, closing his eyes for a bit.
“What’s up? You’re not projecting again, are you?” Y/N finally turned around to look at his friend, paying close attention to his face.
Dalton opened his eyes and stared at the ceiling, feeling his face turn red as he thought of the reason why he wasn’t getting enough sleep “No, no need to worry about that” He giggled, in hopes of lightening the mood. He knew how his friends felt about The Further. Especially Y/N.
“I'm glad cause I can’t imagine going through that again” Y/N joked, still examining his face. She looked at him shuffling in her bed, any sign of discomfort would instantly worry her “Talk to me, Dalton”
He closed his eyes again. He wasn’t the best at opening up about his feelings, so being in this position made him feel a little weird “I’m just really tired, I guess. I didn’t get enough sleep last night”
“Come on, don’t do this to me” Y/N insisted “If you’re projecting again, or if you have entities chasing after you I would like to know”
Dalton sat up facing Y/N “It’s nothing like that, I promise” He gave her a little smile to assure her he wasn't lying.
“What is it then?” Y/N questioned again.
“Y/N, don’t worry about me” He said standing up and stretching his legs.
“Please don’t ask me to not worry about you when just last month you had one of those… demons inside of you or whatever”
“There’s a different reason why I’ve been losing my sleep, it’s not demon related” Dalton promised, avoiding eye contact.
“Well, I’m still your friend” Y/N stood up and carefully grabbed Dalton’s hand. She cared about him and she just wanted to make sure he was ok “You can tell me anything, even if it’s not demon related” She giggled.
Dalton looked at how their hands were touching and felt his face burning again. The reason he was feeling this way was pretty obvious, but he could never say it out loud. Dalton was a very shy person and he never really did anything about his crushes, he never bothered but Y/N… she was different. She was sweet, funny, talented, beautiful and the way she cared about her friends (especially about him) was admirable.
“Hey” Y/N snapped him back to reality, forcing eye contact “I understand if you want me to get out of your hair, but if you wanna talk I’m right here” She said giving him a comforting smile. He wanted to be honest but he was scared that a confession like this would ruin their friendship.
“I’m just- I’m really stressed with homework” He lied. Again.
Y/N knew he was lying, he wasn’t very good at it “Yeah, me too” She grumbled, dropping Dalton’s hand and sitting back down.
‘Coward’ Dalton thought to himself. Y/N returned her attention to the canvas she was working on, wondering how much time had passed since she got distracted.
“Are you hungry? We could take a lunch break” Dalton asked, sitting next to Y/N, desperate to change the subject.
“I’m ok, you can go get some tho” Oh.
Dalton was surprised at the attitude, she never really acted that way, not with him “Everything ok?” He questioned.
Y/N scoffed, but her eyes were still glued to the canvas. Suddenly the timer went off, making both of them jump and an unwanted line appeared under the brush she was holding “Fuck” Y/N said under her breath.
Dalton turned the loud timer off “Don’t worry, we will cover it up” He tried to make her feel better.
Y/N sighed “I’m sorry” She said as she put down the brush, Dalton wasn’t sure what she was apologizing for “I just get worried about you, I don’t want you to get hurt” Y/N went for Dalton’s hand again, this time intertwining their fingers.
Sometimes he thought Y/N felt the same way about him, and right now was one of those times. With a random boost of confidence, Dalton knew it was now or never.
After seeing no reaction, Y/N was about to drop Dalton's hand but he stopped her, holding her tighter “I like you” He blurted out. He could feel his heart rate get significantly higher when Y/N looked at him, seeing the surprised look on her face Dalton felt regret fill his body. He was even more nervous now, feeling his hands sweat wishing he never said that.
“What?”
“I- I’m sorry”
“You do?” Y/N still had that surprised look on her face, but her tone made Dalton hopeful.
“Yes” He smiled at her “I do, and I’m sorry if this makes things weird from now on but… I’ve been thinking about you a lot and I wanted to tell you” Dalton directed his attention at their hands, his heart was still racing and he knew for a fact his face was bright red.
“Dalton” Y/N whispered, cupping his face with her free hand forcing him to look at her again “I like you too”
“Really?” Dalton tried to hide his smile but failed.
“Of course I do” His smile grew bigger and he let out a breath he didn’t know he was holding.
“Good, cause I don’t think we could’ve finished this project on time if you had rejected me” They both laughed and finally relaxed for the first time today.
“Can I kiss you?” Y/N asked softly and out of nowhere, looking at his blue eyes anxiously waiting for an answer.
Dalton was speechless and his face was burning again “I’ve never kissed anyone before” He forced the words out.
“I thought you and Chris-”
“No” Dalton quickly interrupted her “She kissed me and it was only to get out of a weird situation, it doesn’t count”
Y/N gave Dalton a soft smile, without taking her eyes off of him “That’s ok, I just- if it’s ok with you-”
Before she could finish the sentence, she felt Dalton’s lips on her. His soft lips. For a second Y/N was frozen, but soon enough she was kissing him back, letting go of his hand and moving her own to Dalton’s long hair.
After a moment, Dalton pulled back and studied Y/N’s face “What now?” Y/N breathed.
“Now I take you out on a date”
#dalton lambert#dalton lambert x reader#insidious#insidious the red door#insidious 5#ty simpkins#horror films#dalton lambert fluff#dalton lambert fic#dalton lambert imagines#dalton lambert imagine#movies
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💜Purple💜
☀️Feelbokkie M.list ☀️
Purple: Creativity, Royalty, Wealth
genre: heavy angst, unestablished relationship
pov: 2nd person
description: life can be lonely when everyone thinks you're perfect. Hyunjin knows that first hand.
pairing: idol!hyunjin x reader
warnings: swearing, reader is a bit of a shitty person
word count: 1,580 (unedited)
©feelbokkie (2023) — all rights reserved. reposting/modification of any kind is not tolerated.
🖍️Crayon Box M.list🖍️
“You truly are a prince.” You stare in awe as you examine Hyunjin's face mentally talking as the sun lights his face. You managed to sketch out his face onto your canvas, not that it did any justice to the demigod of a man sitting in front of you. Thankfully you took a picture of him earlier so you can reference it later. And you're thankful that Hyunjin took his turn painting you first, your nerves alone would have definitely cut into his painting time if you had gone first. He's busy enough as it is, you know it would be hard for him to find another day off again so you two could work on your project.
When Hwang Hyunjin himself walked into the community center for the local painting class, you thought that it was an accident. And when he took the only open seat, which happened to be next to you, you froze, not sure if you were dreaming or actually alive. You vaguely knew who he was. You heard his music before and seen his ads around the city, but with those looks and that talent, you weren't even sure he was a real person.
You heard whispers from other classmates about how he was nicknamed a prince. You could see it, although you found his features more godlike than anything else. As your classes went on, Hyunjin stuck to you and you had no idea why. You definitely didn't want to deal with the negative attention from your classmates. But you didn't mind working with him.
He was quiet and kept to himself. His work seemed perfect, you weren't sure why he was even in the class. You spent more time staring at his art rather than at him. It always seemed sad. And maybe it was the fact that you never engaged in any of the gossip and that you also kept to yourself that drew him to you. So when you were assigned to find a partner and paint each other's portraits, he asked you. What shocked you even more is when he asked you on a date as well. Before that, he hadn't spoken more than two words to you.
“Please don’t call me that.” He hums quietly, careful to keep his pose perfect for you. His long, dyed blonde hair framed his face perfectly. His eyes focusing on the prop rose that he brought with him. With the way he looks now, you're so tempted to add a crown on yourself.
“What, a prince?” You question as you dig into your bag looking for a color to start the background. Maybe literally working from the outside in might intimidate you less and you can start painting Hyunjin.
“Yes,” He answers shortly.
“Why not? I think it’s a perfectly good compliment.” You pull out a blue and green, debating if you should stick with the colors that are very visible behind him.
“It’s not,” He scoffs, rolling his eyes. He's quickly reverting to the Hyunjin you see in class. The quiet, easily annoyed man who always looks like he would rather be anywhere else until he actually starts painting.
“What’s wrong? Why are you acting like this?” You set the paint down and peek your head past your canvas.
“Like what?” He hisses through his teeth.
“Angry. Annoyed. A jackass.” You roll your eyes. Before this, he was so much happier. The two of you had several deep conversations. Hyunjin speaking more than you so you could keep your pose for him. He even laughed a few times. You couldn't help but watch him speak from the corner of your eye. His mouth twitching upward as he spoke about his work, groupmates, and all of the things he loves. That Hyunjin has clearly left the park now.
“I’m annoyed," He squeezes his eyes shut, taking a deep breath, "I'm annoyed because people often call me a prince and belittle my accomplishments based on my appearance.”
"Got it," You nod pressing your lips together and disappearing back behind your canvas. You pull out a larger bottle of green paint and put a bit in a cup before diluting it with water for the underpainting.
The two of you sit in silence as you mix the paint and water. The tension in the air unsettles you. You feel like how you did on your first day of class.
"You agree with them, don't you?" Hyunjin asks, breaking the silence and your concentration. You furrow your eyebrows at him, even though you know he can't see you behind the large canvas.
"I didn't say that," You say quickly, hoping to calm the nerves that no doubt were brewing inside him.
"But you're thinking it. Or at least you thought it. That's why you're being quiet." He says accusingly, his voice getting louder. You look around the park. It's nearly deserted, which is why you chose it. You wanted to avoid a fan spotting him and alerting fellow stay of Hyunjinn's whereabouts.
"Hyunjin, let's not--"
"Oh my God, I was right!" He shouts. You once again turn around to check the park as you put down the diluted green paint and walk over to where Hyunjin was posing. He's now cleaning up his stuff and putting them in his bags.
"Hyunjin, we were having a good time, let's not get into this right now." You try to calm him down as he haphazardly throws small tubes of paint into his bag.
"No, I think we should get into this right now before we even think about going on a date." He spat.
"I didn't mean anything by it when I called you a prince. It was just a compliment." You pause and look at him, really look at him. His face is twisted in anger. His jaw clenched, lips curled in disgust, nostrils flared, and eyes shooting you a warning glare. Daring you to elaborate.
"It's a backhanded compliment at best." He scoffs again. You step closer to Hyunjin. His fist clench, crushing the flower he was holding oh so delicately moments ago.
"I did not mean it like that." You breathe calmly, placing your hand on his.
"Yes, you did. Everyone always does. Everyone always overlooks my hard work and dedication and dismisses them because--what? I'm attractive? 'Blessed by good genes and god?' They don't see the countless hours I've spent in dance studios going over choreography until I felt like my lungs were going to collapse and bones were going to break. Or how many times I sing or rap until my voice is raw and sore before I even have to record and still not be good enough. Everyone just sees my face or just thinks I'm naturally talented so of course I'm an idol. I am sick and tired of it, Y/n. I'm tired." The anger quickly leaves his body. His lips fall slack, head falling forward as he squeezes his eyes shut. His chokehold on the flower loosening.
"Hyunjin, I didn't mean to dismiss your hard work. Honestly. It's just that, you're so beautiful, like living art, that you can't expect people to not comment on it." You close the gap between the two of you, placing a hand on his shoulder.
"But?" He mumbles.
"But?"
"Your voice. Something is missing in your words. I can hear it in your voice. Like there's something you're not saying."
"I'm not hiding anything."
"Bullshit," He scoffs. "I spent an entire hour studying your body language as I painted you. I can read you like a book now. If you have something to say, say it already." He lifts his head and opens his eyes. His red, sore eyes meet your concerned dry ones, piercing into your soul.
"I don't have anything to say." You lie.
Because, how can you tell him that he's partially right? You don't dismiss all of his hard work. You've seen him dance and hear him sing. You can tell that he has some sort of natural talent, it's impossible not to. And you also know that he works hard to maintain that talent and grow as a performer. But you also know that his princely looks helped him get to where he is today. If he looked average--if he looked half as attractive as he does now, he might not be as successful as he is now. But you can't tell him that, you don't have the heart to.
"Good talk," he sneers, pushing your hand off of his shoulder and stepping back, "I'm so glad we had this little chat. Now I know that I'd be wasting my time dating you."
"What? I didn't even say anything," You're taken aback by his sudden change in attitude. You can't help but stare at him as he finishes gathering his things.
"You didn't have to Y/n, I could see it in your eyes. It's another one of my princely talents, I can read everyone like a book. And I read everything I needed to in your eyes. And I want no part of it." He says as he starts walking away, dropping the crumpled rose on the floor.
"Wait, Hyunjin!" You call out.
"That's the thing, Y/n. It's fucking lonely at the throne. But I'd rather be miserable and lonely than surround myself with people who genuinely do not give a shit about me or how hard I actually work. See you in class."
—
Buy me a coffee?
—
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Soooooo I noticed you like Hassel and your boi's got daddy issues. So how about some headcanons of Hassel being someones father figure? Student or not whatever's easier for you please and thank you!
I got two asks about Hassel as a father figure in the same day as each other and that’s so funny to me. He just exudes dad energy huh? I’m going with a teenage student in this one rather than a young kid, though I can definitely be persuaded to do a different Hassel dad scenario! Um, I did end up getting a little project-y here, sorry about that. Oops- Hope you enjoy :D
CW: Absent father, implied bad mother, and feelings regarding that
Hassel As A Father Figure
- It’s easy to get attached to Hassel, especially if you’re a young teenager lacking praise or affection. Your own father is distant at best, and not in the picture at worst. You don’t let it bother you. Whenever one of your peers gives you their sympathy, you shrug it off. He hasn’t been in your life for a long time. How can you miss something you’ve never had? That is until an innocuous compliment from your art teacher makes you tear up. You manage to hide it behind your paper, but you know that your eyes sting and your heart simultaneously aches and soars inside the confines of your ribs. It’s hard not to feel ashamed. You thought you were beyond this, that whatever wound your father left closed up a long time ago. Evidently, you were wrong.
- Hassel notices. Of course, he does. Teenagers are never as good at hiding things as they think they are. Out of respect for your privacy, he doesn’t mention it. He does keep a closer eye on you, though. When you find yourself at his desk, nervously showing him what you’ve been working on, along with a heaping of praise, he adds that his door is always open if you need to talk.
- It takes you a while to take him up on his offer. During your lunch, Hassel happens to have a free period, and you’re too busy fidgeting with your lunchbox, wondering if you’re a weirdo for even showing up, to notice Hassel approaching you. He waves, invites you inside, and asks what you need. You shrug. “I don’t really have anyone to eat lunch with and I feel stupid just sitting at a table alone. Can I eat in here?”
- Hassel, of course, says yes. The art room is open to anyone for whatever reason. Would you prefer to eat in silence or talk? You decide on silence. He takes it in stride, offering you a smile before he sits down and works on his lesson plan. It takes you even longer to talk to him. Every so often, you’ll blurt out a question you had in class but were too shy to share. Hassel’s answers are never concise. The rest of your lunch is spent slowly working through your sandwich while he rambles.
- It’s during one of your lunch visits that Hassel’s cousin drops by, and he steps into the hall to give them a piece of his mind. You can’t help but listen. They’re right outside after all, and you can’t deny your curiosity. His situation isn’t the same as yours, but you can’t help but feel a bit of solidarity. His dad is far away, and though that is his choice, you want to know if there’s any common ground. Your dad left you. It was out of your control. How can you make yourself feel like you wanted that? That you were the one that left him. Would you go back to normal? You never felt like this before. Why now?
- Hassel steps back into the room, running an exhausted hand down his face, and starts to offer you an apology. Before he can speak, you beat him to it. “Do you ever miss your dad?”
- Not the most elegant way to start a conversation. You immediately recognize you may have shoved your foot in your mouth with an embarrassed blush. He’s caught off guard for a moment but recenters himself after a few seconds. “I do occassionally, but I am far happier here than I would have ever been at home.”
- “How do I, um.” You fidget with the strap of your lunchbox. “How do I stop? Missing him, I mean.”
- Hassel doesn’t have an answer for you. He does, however, decide at that very moment that you need someone. A strong guiding force to help you get through this. While there may be no easy solution, he knows that at your age, he would have appreciated support more than anything. His own relationship with his family is rocky. There was no one to foster his talent or interest outside of what was expected of him. There was no helping hand through that brief and lonely period right after he left home. No one to help him navigate his admittedly large emotions. If you ever need anything, no matter how big or small, you are welcome to ask. The same offer he gave you before, though, this time, there was a new weight to it.
- As usual, you start off small. Popping by during his free period to ask for advice on making friends, or whether he knows of any instance that Raifort allows late work. (She doesn’t) Eventually, you go a little deeper. You had a fight with your mom, and you know she’s wrong, but she made you feel childish and small. Hassel frowns and gently tells you that you’re right. She shouldn’t talk to you like that. For some reason, that makes you cry. Which you feel ashamed of because you shouldn’t be crying anymore. That fight was hours ago. You aren’t even mad anymore, so why are you crying? Hassel consoles you and tells you that it’s normal. It’s better to let it all out than keep it in. As he rubs your back, you end up sobbing even harder. He’s right, though. You do feel better after.
- On one of the lunches you spend with Hassel, Brassius happens to drop by. When he sees you, you’re almost taken aback by his grin. He always looks so serious on the billboards of Levincia, not to mention how intense he can be when he’s a guest speaker in class.
- “You must be that student Hass speaks so highly of.” He crosses his arms as he throws a glance at Hassel over his shoulder. “I am honestly surprised he hasn’t tried to pull out adoption papers yet.”
- There is a part of you that worries your attachment to Hassel is one-sided. You’ve accepted that you see him as a surrogate father, but you’ve also accepted that it’s likely he only sees you as a particularly friendly student. Maybe he pities you or something equally awful. Hearing Hassel’s scolding “Brassie!” and Brassius’ snort makes you realize how wrong you are. Even if you want to turn into a Slugma and hide in the vents for a little while.
#pokemon imagines#pokemon headcanons#pokemon x reader#elite four hassel headcanons#hassel headcanons#this is like 1000 words i went off#also brassius bringing up adoption papers is his roundabout way to tell you that he has picked u up by the scruff and hes ur dad now too#two dads for the price of one!
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Chapter Ten (Part 2)
I smile and shake my head, because I’m sure that I won’t be. Jude shuffles on the bed to readjust himself, and when he settles, his leg is resting against mine. It’s warm, mine feels cold. I notice it and wait for him to move but he doesn’t, so I just let our skin touch, and I get a shiver from my toes to the top of my head.
“When you go to Berlin,” I start. “Will you know anybody else there?”
He shakes his head. “No, I’m going on my own, which I’m kind of excited about.”
“Scared though?”
“Yeah, a little bit I suppose. More excited.”
“I think I’d be scared to leave and be away from everybody I know.”
“Yeah, I get that, but I wasn’t really thinking that way when I applied for university there, it was honestly more about the experience I’d have and what I’d learn from doing my degree there.” He shrugs “Plus when I applied I didn’t actually think I’d be going on my own.”
“No?”
“My girlfriend at the time and I applied together, actually, but she didn’t get in. It was brutal, we got our letters on the same day. Art schools work like that sometimes, they send their offers out earlier than other courses because your Leaving Cert points aren’t important. I got accepted and she didn’t, so it was a bad day.”
“So you decided to go alone anyway?”
“Yeah it felt like the best choice for me, I just didn’t see myself being in Ireland anymore, I don’t want to waste my early twenties in this horrible recession, and I don’t want to graduate into it with no job prospects. I just need to get away from it.”
“and your girlfriend?”
“We broke up. We stayed together until we finished our exams and then we called it quits. I don’t want to put her through the long distance thing, like, honestly I don’t want to put myself through it, because I know I can’t handle that. I really just… I don’t want any attachments when I go, like, no responsibilities towards anybody else. Having a relationship while trying to navigate the changes that are ahead of me,” He shakes his head. “It would be too hard.”
“Wow. How long were you together?”
“Almost a year.”
That seems like forever to me. Nobody I know has been in a relationship for that long. “It must have been a hard decision.”
“It was, she’s a great person.”
“Well you can always get back together at some point in the future, you know, like maybe someday when you graduate…” I don’t continue because he’s already shaking his head no.
“I don’t think so – It’s just over, I can’t really see us picking up where we left off, like, nothing to do with her or the relationship per se. It’s just that I feel like I can’t ever go backwards, once it’s done, it’s done for me. I just don’t really hang on to other people in that way.”
I think about how I do. I’m a clinger and I always have been, so his philosophy on life is totally foreign to me, just like the idea of jetting off to some unknown city all on my own without speaking the language or knowing how a single thing in its society operates. I think that he’s much braver than I am for doing it, but I’m a little sad that he’s going. Maybe in a parallel universe he and I would have attended the same art college and been friends who hung around in Dublin together after our respective classes, sitting outside coffee shops in the city and talking about art and sculpture and our silly assignments, but none of that will happen. In a few weeks he’ll be gone forever and I will likely never get to see him again.
I look down at our legs and move mine away from his. Perhaps it’s not a good idea for us to be touching after all.
“You look a little sleepy.” He says to me gently, and I am. I’m more than sleepy. It’s so late now that I must be awake for almost forty hours straight, running purely on the last shreds of adrenaline from being with him, but as soon as he mentions sleep my eyelids feel so heavy, and even the hard, flat wall that my back rests against feels cosy. I’m certain I could doze off in this exact position. I admit it, “I am.”
“Then sleep. I’ll leave.”
“Okay.”
He makes a tiny movement towards me and then hesitates and begins to get up. “Okay Evie, I’ll see you again soon.”
I reach out my weary arms for a hug goodbye and when he leans in to embrace me my face grazes his neck, and he’s warm and his arms are strong and I wonder what the consequences would be if I let myself fall asleep on him right there and then. Maybe he’d be forced to stay here with me all night.
“I’ll text you when I’m free to hang out again.” He says, letting me go.
“Mm”
I lay down to sleep on the bed. The blankets are so warm from where he was sitting.
Before my eyes drift closed and I surrender to my exhaustion I glimpse him climbing nimbly out the window and hopping down onto the grass outside, disappearing into the darkness and leaving the gauzy curtains fluttering behind him. It’s like he was never even here.
Prev // Next
#sims#sims 4#ts4#simlit#sims 4 story#writing#fiction#romance#sims story#sims 4 storytelling#sims4 storytelling#sims storytelling#lucky girl part 1
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Shattered hearts
Il Dottore x reader angst
Summary: In 3.2, Dottore takes both gnosis, the electro and the dendro, and ya’ll know all his segments are dead 💀; but what if this happened, Dottore made his deal with Nahida, but he made a exchange for Nahida’s assistant (reader) instead of the electro gnosis, the exchange was for the deaths of his segments, Nahida didn’t want too, but reader insisted; She insisted because she wanted to protect her hometown and Nahida. Nahida was sobbing but she excepts your offer. Reader said her goodbyes and went with Dottore. Two years has passed as you being his assistant; through those two years. Reader notices his routines and how he noticed how a nice and beautiful woman can change someone perspective; they both got fairly close; but the fatui are not on point with these new notices and closeness, so they have to take it by hand… (Also there’s an age gap in this AU, Dottore is 41 and reader is 28; thats a 13 years age gap, i do like my older men 🥺 also Dottore sometimes speaks in lab terms.) also also, i think Dottore looks amazing like this beautiful art that how he gonna look like in this AU and go follow the artist by the way they’re amazing!
Suggestion of a song I was listening to while writing this.
Warnings: deep angst, blood, blood lose, starvation, cursing, depression, soft Dottore, spoilers for Dottore real name (Zandik), deep guilt, character death, and sad ending
Word count: 5279
(Y/n)’s POV
“GET AWAY FROM HER!!” Dottore said
Everything felt heavy around You, the astrosphere of your surroundings were slightly blurred from the tears and crimson blood that was flowing out of your body, your chest felt like a burning sun was going right through you, (Y,n) tried to move her eyes to look at Dottore, he was being pulled down, by two fatui guards, he was trying to break there strong grip, but no budge, (Y/n) tried to move her hand forward, but got crushed by a boot, “AAAAAAAAAAA-“ the boot move fairly quickly to (Y/n) mouth to shut her up.
“Shut your mouth princess, we don’t want your boyfriend to get anymore feisty then he already is-“
“I will fucking dissect you and use your organs as fuel for my fucking fireplace if you, LEAVE HER FUCK ALONE.”
‘Zandik…’
The fatui member just laughed because he knows damn well, Dottore can’t do shit, they took his special abilities away, his knifes, his living space, EVERYTHING, the only things he has is what he’s wearing when (Y/n) and him first meet at Sumeru…
“I’m soo scared Mr Dottore, OH WAIT, your not in the fatui anymore, no more 2nd class fatui harbinger, NO MORE Mr doctor to be called, because you broke a rule!”
Dottore felt deflated because he just lost all his progress because… because of me, ‘why… did- why did i insisted. he lost everything, his work, his segments, and… just- everything just gone…” While Dottore looked to the ground, he then looked up, “no, I haven’t.”
“And what makes you say that?”
“I still have my assistant.” He looked at (Y/n) through his mask but his lips was quivering.
“Aww how disgusting… HEY YOU” the fatui member pointed at the member that was holding Dottore down on his left. “Take his mask off, he doesn’t deserve or have the right to wear that mask. Also I just wanted to see what he looked like.”
The left fatui member yanked Dottore mask off in a harsh way, he threw it across the room, “damn your a lot older, I thought you were in your early 30s”
Dottore just looked at him with burning hatred.
“Welp enough chit chat, time to put this sick puppy to sleep.
“NO!? LET GO OF ME!!”
(Y/n) never knew that a man that's been called a psychopath or a monster, can have so much emotion to someone. The man moved his boot to your arm, and faced a shotgun, right on the tip of your skull. The cold tip of the gun gave shivers down your spine, soft whipping came from your gentle voice and it frightened Dottore to the bone.
“No- no please I beg-“
“Wow, I've never seen such a sight.”
A deeper and much rougher voice walked in the room.
‘Captaino?!?’
“Let her go, I have orders to execute her.”
The fatui member moved his feet off (Y/n) and gave the shotgun to Captaino and ran off. Captaino saw how (Y/n) was trying to get up, but Captaino put the cold tip of the shotgun on your head again. And you paused.
“I suggest you don’t get up… crawl instead.”
“Why…”
“Do you want to die?”
(Y/n) started crawling slowly to Dottore, Captaino was watching from afar but he was counting.
“Stop— sto- stop please” to Dottore cry was out of this world. “Dottore… help-“ “sweetheart- please just-“
Dottore try to move out again, squirming to break free, Captaino was slowly walking up to (Y/n), he saw how much blood was on the floor, painting crimson all over the concrete flooring. Dottore was panicking because each time Captaino got closer, he felt like he'd be a nobody without you, "please pick me— not her- I’ll do anything- please!!!” Captaino put the shotgun on the tip of her skull… “Nahida… I’m sorry— I’m sorry, I failed you, I’m sorry Zan-“
“Shut your mouth, you rat!”
“PLEASE— please just pick me- leave her be-“
Everything felt more heavy, your body felt slightly colder than before, your eyesight is fading slowly, ‘please…’
Dottore POV
Dottore eyes were clenching shut ‘NO- NO- NO, please oh archons please…’
Suddenly he felt cold, frostbite cold, his body was slowly getting colder by mere seconds, he opened his eyes and saw a cryo vision, the right fatui member saw it too and tried to grab it but right when he let go of Dottore. Dottore snatched it, ‘I’m such a fool.’ Then he found out he can have fast cryo speeds and swoop up (Y/n).
“SEES HIM”
‘Fuck what else can this mechanism can do!?!?”
As Captaino was inches from the both of you, you both teleported; leaving an icy debris where they were at.
“Find them now!!!”
—- time skip —-
When Dottore opened his eyes he was laying on the ice cold snow, snow was slowly falling from the sky, which made him panic and stopped him from his calm trance, he sat up and looked below his chest and saw (Y/n). “Sweet Thing-“ he immediately checked your pulse and your heart was fine? You were breathing normally but.- he checked your stomach region and it was covered in snowy ice, “how long was I sleep-“ Dottore heard a whipper and look at your face, you were crying softly and he just now noticed you slightly shaking, “I-
“SEARCH, I WANT THERE HEADS ON A STICK, LOOK FOR THAT WOMAN’S BLOOD”
Dottore is sweating bullets now, he looked to his left and saw Captaino screaming for murder. “Fuck- ok ok.” He looked back at you with panic, “don’t worry I- I got you- just… Shezhnaya to Sumeru, just- *gulp* fuck…”
“There!?!”
His heart was racing like a wildfire, “just Shezhnaya to Sumeru-“ “KILL THEM.” “Just- FUCK- just Shezhnaya to Sumeru” Dottore was holding you tighter and tighter from each step the fatui took, “just Sumeru please-!”
Teleport
“They got away sir-“
Shot
The agent’s body fell limp to the ground, blood spewing out of his skull leaving a crimson snowflake to the ground.
“Dispose the body, his family won’t be very happy about the news. That he failed to do a simple order.”
— time skip —
Dottore was holding (Y/n) and Fell to the concrete ground on his back, “physics…” then he got a spear above his face, it was a Sumeru guard, he was shocked that he made it to Sumeru but felt so lightheaded and drained, “how the hell did you got here, and stand up!” Dottore tried but he felt like he was gonna puke, “please- I just need her to be at- a medical station or a doctor- she’s bleeding badly-“ the guard kept his spear at him and moved his head to see (Y/n) and fear was his eyes, “(Y/n)!?” The guard dropped his spear and picked (Y/n) up brittle style, and ran to the big green palace, “good- *sniff* fuck-“ tears ran down Dottore eyes, weak sorrowful tears that just won’t stop, he put his gloved hands on his eyes, to hide his shame from everyone, the two guards that were around protecting Nahida palace were shocked, Dottore just remembered he has trackers on his vest and boot, so his “fatui friends” would “help” and find him, he got the one in his left side of his vest and frosted it and smashed it in his palm and try to sit up again because there was one under boot, ‘“tch”, and slowly got up, and took it and frosted that one and smashed it, one of the guard’s from the palace; walk up to Dottore and point a spear to Dottore’s face, “why did you destroy those-“ “how idiotic can you simpletons can be, I destroy my trackers so no- no one get… fuck… hurt” the guard noticed Dottore was clutching his stomach region, “how did you- teleported here?”
Dottore couldn’t care less so he showed the guard the cryo vision, “a delusion?”
“No, my vision…”
The guard tried to speak up again but Dottore shut him up.
“I got it, from saving (Y/n), she was dying, and…”
Suddenly Dottore felt prickles in his abdomen, small roses spikes that were stabbing his insides, it felt like it was growing up fast, slowly going up his throat, “aa— *cough* *cough*” rose petals were coughing up from his throat, the guard was worryingly confused until Nahida came into view. “Leave.” The guard walked back to his post, “didn’t I tell you were banished from coming here.”
“Yes— but- *cough* I was banished from Shezhnaya too—“ “So you think you can just come back-“ “No—“
The prickles were getting to his lungs, it was hard to breathe, “I— *gasp* I wanted to save— fuck— I can’t—“ “CANT what Il Dottore!” “I— COULDN'T LEAVE HER- OK—“ Dottore was trying to breathe but couldn’t, with little strength he had he punched his chest to try to break the prickles, but that just made it worse, he just coughed out some more blood and crimson petals, his lightheaded head was turning to a migraine, “please— I’m- *gasp* sorry I took her from you—“ Nahida was shocked… hearing a man that use to have so much pride and thought everything was a sick joke; begging, begging for his life, Nahida sighed, and killed off the roses that she made his body, Dottore gasped for air and had some coughing fit but at least he was breathing again…
“When you feel alright I want you out, out of this region, you are banned from seeing (Y/n), i hope you rot in the abyss.”
And Nahida just walked back to her palace not even looking back.
Dottore laid on the ground for a while, waiting for his dear (Y/n) to recover…
— time skip (3 hours past) —
After he felt recovered, by using his cryo elements, to put some ice on his wounds, he waited by the stairs, while his wounds slowly heal, he felt so exhausted, this migraine isn’t helping either, he growled in frustration; he started to stare at his gloves again and put his gloved hands to his forehead, and a ice coolness cooled his head, a sigh of relief came out of him, until he heard one of the guards from the palace coming near him, “scram…”
“I should be the one saying That to you.” The guard spoke.
“…”
“Hey don’t ignore me. Leave and leave-“
“This region I get it…”
Dottore slowly got up, he felt dizzy, ‘fuck’ “leave!” “Tch…” and slowly walked down the long steep walkway, the sun felt hotter than usual, ‘I hope I’m not having a fever… Well lots of blood loss, open wounds, using cryo to close them up, having an awful migraine, and out of breath.’ He slowed his pace and made it to the bottom, food stations were everywhere, Dottore was breathing heavy; he sweating bullets, “fu— *breathing heavy* where’s a chair or bench—“ as Dottore was panting while looking downward , a woman came up with concern, “sir are you-?” While Dottore looked up just the slightest, she had a horrified look, “sorry- I must go!” Dottore felt miserable, ‘stupid face, stupid scar, stupid people…” when he felt less dizzy, he straightened himself up but hid his face with a hand when someone looked, he slowly walked through treasures street and passed the grand bazaar entrance, ‘damn this heat’.
Everyone was staring daggers and disgusted looks, he sighed in a shaking breath, and walked to the fence and leaned on it, two people were talking behind the blacksmith building and saw Dottore, and ran off.
Dottore just groaned in disappointment; ‘Not a single person is gonna help me, hehe , why wouldn’t they, I murdered countless of people, test subjects thousands or maybe even millions over the years, strangled men and women’, he put his gloved hands over his face, he shakily soft laughed, ‘how do you care for someone like me, you were afraid of me at first, but you just had me wrapped around your sweet little finger, showing the equivalent of love in a short while of time, how touch starved, I can be around you, I always wanted to try to get close to you but the law and the act in Shezhnaya is to not get close to someone, show no emotions, no love, just pure rage, and arson, everywhere you walk; you were afraid of Shezhnaya, terrified of me… but you stop being fearful, instead of fear, you were concerned and worried about me, why— why were you concerned about me, is because to torment me, to change my motives, for the good and not for the rotting evil of a harbinger’, his hands were freezing up slowly, ‘why— was it because it took me a year to finally understand what you were doing to me… how— you just…
No, no— what am I saying, you were a woman that got tooken away from your homeland, so of course, she needed someone else to talk to… and you just talking to me, made me feel vulnerable, haven’t felt that in years, being slightly immoral, can be so lonely and trapped, but you changed that, which— fuck.. god damn it!… Hehe—‘ his lips started to quiver; and he slowly turned his back to the fence and sat down on the concrete floor, he put his head back with his eyes closed… ‘What am I gotta do with you, oh (Y/n)…’
—- time skip —
The small nap was interrupted by there royal fucking guards again, “didn’t I tell you to scram.”
“Didn’t I tell you, I have no were to go…”
“I don’t care, you need to leave.”
“I can't leave this place that far anyway, I’ll be dead in mere seconds…”
“And-“
“I’m already dying anyway, I’m using my ice to repeatedly covering up my wounds, I feel unsteady when I walk, I’m just stuck here with no medical attention-“
“Don’t you have your own medical supplies, you are called the doctor.”
Dottore looked like he was about to murder this man. “They took my supplies at Shezhnaya and I can’t get any, because everyone is afraid of me…” he said while gritting his teeth.
“Yeah, because you're a murder and a freak.”
Dottore’s anger turned to disappointment because of hearing it again or just several times. “Tch” the guard left with annoyance, ‘just leave me the fuck alone… I’ll skin you…’ Dottore sighs and lays his head on his knee. After some minutes his stomach growled, ‘I can handle this later’ and rest his migraine away…
— time skip (the next day) —
Dottore woke up from his stomach growling again, but it slightly hurt this time, ‘hmm how long was I asleep…' ' he felt undizzy, his wounds felt a lot better, but they felt they might reopen again, if he doesn’t be careful. So he slowly got up and rubbed the dirt off, and looked up and saw the dark blue sky filled with stars, he looked back at the stalls and saw people still working, he walked past the blacksmith and went to his left, and arrived at the first food stall.
“May I-“ the person at the stall, put a close sign up and rushed to the back of his stall. “Fine.”
Walked to the next
“Can-“ and did the same thing but covered his shop up.
‘Idiots’
He walked to several others but they all said no, the last one was the bar and they locked it, before he even knocked on the door, “FINE.” He walk up to one of the tables and sat down on one of the chairs, it was more comfortable then, sitting on the concrete, he put his arms on the table and rest his head on them, trying to ignore his stomach even though it hurts, each time it growled, he sucked his stomach in to stop the pain, the guard from either was walking passed by and saw Dottore, he shocked his head walked away to his spot again.
‘Darn this body’ Dottore put his head back down. A couple minutes passed and a brave young waitress came up to him.
“Sir, you-“
“I need to leave, I get, but I can’t go anywhere, because…” he puts his head up with annoyance, “If I leave, I die, I have a bounty on my head, from the fatui, I can’t go to liyue, mondstadt, Shezhnaya, or any other regions, you can think of, because apparently I’m still fatui to everyone but I’m not.
“Why is-“
“Why you might ask, because a archon I made a deal with, to take her assistant instead of the electro gnosis, because I thought I NEEDED an assistant because all my segments were dead; so I did. And what did that get me?”
“…”
“A change of perspective in life…”
“And that’s a bad thing, why?”
“It’s not… I just… I don’t know, I lost all my work, because of a single person…”
There was an awkward silence. Not until Dottore’s stomach was craving for food once more, it made Dottore look away from embarrassment. She saw how he slightly tense up each time it craved.
“Do you… have mora?”
“I do…”
“I'll.. try to negotiate with my boss, and give you one of are menus”
Dottore looked back dumbfounded, “you're not scared of me?”
“No, well maybe a little, everyone knows what you did in the past was terrible, but you definitely changed, when you got down here you didn’t even attack anyone or hurt anyone, even when the other stores faked out they were sold out or they were closed, you just walk off… I saw you when you first walked down the walkway; when I was doing food deliveries…so don’t beat yourself up… I’ll be right back…”
She went back inside, and tried to negotiate with her boss. It took an hour in a half but she came back with not a menu but a well down steak, with potatoes and fish fries on the side and also put down a glass of water, “sorry, we argue for awhile, so while we argued I made a meal for you, I hope you like it. If not, I can change it.”
Dottore was so focused on the food in front of him that he forgot the waitress was there, he shook his head and looked at the waitress, “sorry dear, and the food looks delicious so no changes but here.”
Instead of giving mora he gave a gold coin, it almost looked like a gold nugget, but it was certainly not mora. She was shocked, her eyes were slightly puffy, “also this is for your boss, for hiring an amazing chef.” He gave yet another gold coin. He was about to pick up his fork, but she hugged him. “Thank you— so much—“ his body tense up, but she let go, “ *sniff* also you're not terrifying as people say you are; having a massive scar on your face doesn't make you look scary, you're actually quite handsome- well thank you again, have a good meal!” And she left.
‘I’m not terrifying’ he touched his face with his left hand, and touched his scar. ‘Handsome…’ he put his hand down and was about to eat again until he heard her boss cheering with joy from inside the bar.
“You're welcome.”
And started to eat his food.
— time skip (the next day) —
Dottore felt at ease, walking around Sumeru, less stares happened around, some people pity him, some of them stare with hatred, and some look with sad looks, the little waitress incident probably brought the whole town on a good note. Even some nurses or doctors ask for medical facts, which was surprising. Nahida was still a bit, spectacle on Dottore, so she made Al Haitham have a close eye on him.
While he was walking he was thinking back to what you said, when you both were at his lab.
—
“Why do you test on humans anyway?”
“To check what was their cause of death, to see their blood cells can generate more blood cells than any normal human being, to see if their soul can go into mechanical matter, or you might say a robot or droids.”
“Has.. anyone healed much faster than a normal being?
“No. Haven’t got anyone to heal much faster than anyone, I would say only archons can do that, not unless you kill them fast enough.”
(Y/n) kinda tense up from that. Dottore noticed this. And looked back on his notes.
“Sorry dear, I know if I frighten you but I’m not thinking of hurting lesser lord kusanali, or have her dead, I haven’t killed an archon in years so you're fine.”
“You killed archons.”
“Some but very few, couldn’t get samples. I was planning to help with my segments but that’s a long waste now.”
“What if… you found someone with that ability?”
He finally looked back up with a questionable look, “if I did I would’ve been more immoral than I already am?”
“You're immortal?”
“Not really, but I can age once every 50 years.”
“That’s pretty short compared to archons.”
“It is… but why do you ask?”
“Umm… I used to have a friend that was half archon, she lived half the life span as an archon does, but that’s still more than any other humans, she meant.”
“Is she-“
“She passed away years ago from a spear to the heart.”
“…”
“But she could've lived longer, if the spear missed her heart by some inches she would’ve lived, they said when she was comatose sometimes the only way you knew she woke up or fully healed is when it rains…”
“Was her mother, Amphitrite.”
“Yes.”
“And her father?”
“A human of course, but unknown.”
“Maybe… nevermine.”
And he went back to his studies.
—-
‘Half-achron…’
When he was walking up to the green palace to see if he could check on (Y/n) , it started to rain… it started to drizzle, but when he got closer to the last steps. It was pouring, his coat was getting soaked but he couldn’t care less…
“Shot it’s pouring hard…”
“Yeah…” Both guards said; they both walked back to the palace.
Until…
Door slam open
“Zandik!?!”
“Your- your a-“
Before he could say anything else.
She flew right in his arms, he had to take aback what happened, ‘you have wings, you have hydro vision, you— you're the half archon?!?!’
“I’m— sorry I didn’t tell you, who I was-“
“You were terrified (Y/n), I wouldn’t doubt you for telling me before either…”
She just softly giggled, they both hugged for a while until Nahida stepped out, she was frustrated, she didn’t even notice Dottore, , “(Y/n)! You're still healing-“ she saw Dottore, she wanted to stop him, but after she saw (Y/n) genuinely happy, her frustration cooled down, she had a sad but forgiving smile, she walked down gently. Little music notes each time she stepped, the rain was lessing out, to a soft drizzle.
Dottore looked down at (Y/n) and (Y/n) looked back, she had shuck a gentle smile, then he looked at her wings, they were like blobs of water, but as shiny as sapphires, gentle gemstones that can shatter in a simple touch. He put his hand through her wings, they were warm, “your hands are cold even through your gloves”, “sorry… still new to these visions…” “hehe”, her laugh was generally cute… “is your vision really next to your heart…”
“It is…” she made her vision glow; her skin glowed slightly where her heart was located. “I’m very fragile; when there’s no rain out; I’ll be shattered like a glass heart; lefted like dirt and grime; lefted like the abyss.”
“But when there is rain, your power grows like a sunflower, looks beautiful, when it consumes sunlight, but mellows down when there isn’t…”
(Y/n)’s cheeks blushed, which made Dottore chuckle; closed his eyelids and delicately kissed her forehead, “then I’ll treat you delicately like a sweet little sunflower, love…”
The drizzling was just near drips.
Click
Dottore's eyes shot and looked to the stairway that was leading downward and saw Captaino, he had a gun that had a large harpoon at the end of it, pointing at (Y/n). He moved her behind him, and the drizzle slowly went back to rain.
“Sorry to cancel your plans, but oh Dottore, we wouldn’t want your poor princess to be hurt don’t we…”
“Back. Off.”
“So demanding. when it comes to her, I wonder… is it because she is a half-archon.”
Dottore was about to speak up, but…
“Oh I knew from the very start; when she arrived to are quarters, when the harbingers and I saw you stepped in with her, we thought you were going show some murderest game, that was going to a irrupt, but we got it all wrong, that little glass heart was your assistant, how she hid behind you, when we had other meetings, I did some digging and found out that she’s a little straight angle of a archon, her other half is a mere human; I kept silent for so long, because i was wondering, what in the world are you toying with a half-fucking-archon.”
“…”
“Hehe, but you weren’t toying with her, your cold shivering heart, couldn’t seem to understand how a kind and beautiful sunflower can change your reality…”
“Hmmp, I guess that’s why they put me as the 2nd harbinger; I’m well known for my facts that… how should I say it… oh! That love can show more meaning than some garbage gadgets.”
Captaino was silent and pointed the gun at Nahida. He shot the harpoon at Nahida, Dottore put an ice wall before the harpoon could hit her.
“Clever… oh so clever…”
“Miss Kusanali! Are you ok-“
Captaino clicked something on his gun, and the harpoon grappled back, the edge of the harpoon sliced the throat of the Sumeru guard.
“Kaasska—“ the guard was gagging, crimson blood was pouring out of his neck and mouth, he was looking at Nahida for help.
“*sigh* So annoying…”
Captaino moved his left arm up and revealed the shotgun from before.
Shot
“See that wasn’t hard was it… Now.”
Captaino Pointed it at Nahida, but before he can shoot Nahida, Dottore teleported Nahida and the other guard into the green palace and blocked the entrance with solid ice.
Captaino growled with anger in his veins. “You-“
“Me what! You're not killing any archons or any more of Lesser lord Kusanali’s people.”
“Well that’s a shame… because… that half-archon is more valuable…”
“Tch…”
Dottore grabbed a hold of (Y/n)’s wrist and teleported them to the akademiya back entrance that leads to the green palace.
“Zandik?!?! What about Nahida-“
“She’ll be fine! Capitano is aiming towards you; as a rock of captain he is, he’ll do anything for that person to be dead…”
Dottore picked up (Y/n) bridal style and ran into the akademiya building, “everyone get the hell out of here! There’s-“
Captaino broke the door to the back entrance, everyone screamed in panic and ran out. Dottore ran next door to the library, he closed the door and blocked it with yet another solid ice wall.
“Everyone up the elevator now, there’s a murderest fatui harbinger in this building!”
Everyone went up the elevator, it was cramped but everyone got up… apparently they turned off the elevator so no one else could enter. When Dottore got close to the elevator the lower floor was wide open because the power was off…
“(Y/n)…”
“Zandik don’t-“
Dottore dropped her down the elevator shaft and blocked the entrance with solid ice before she could fly up quickly.
“ZANDIK!”
Her voice was slightly muffled because of the ice. The door behind him smashed open. And the man himself; Captaino, has walked in.
“am I interrupting something…”
It made Dottore fist curl, and he turned around to look at Captaino.
“Let’s just get this over with…”
“My pleasure…”
— time skip (I suck at writing fight scenes 🥸) —
Al Haitham POV
I ran into the akademiya, I looked to my left and saw Dottore looked like he was at his limit; Captaino looked like he was unflinched but with bleeding deep cuts.
“LET ME OUT— PLEASE—“
Al Haitham heard (Y/n) from the elevator shalf and ran to it.
“Al Haitham?”
“Don’t worry, I’ll get you out of there!”
Al Haitham used his sword to crack the ice. “Cover your eyes!” (Y/n) covered her eyes with her hands, Al Haitham was about to break the ice, “damn it…” and with one final hit, it broke.
(Y/n)’s POV
When the ice broke, (Y/n) flew up, and saw Dottore, he was on his back, looking afraid and powerless.
“Well… it was nice knowing you Dottore”
Click
“Sleep Well… old friend…”
‘No—‘
Before Captaino shot Dottore with a harpoon, (Y/n) swoops in and got shot straight through the heart by pushing Dottore out of the way.
“NOO—“
Before Captaino would say selfish remark, with the last of her powers she used the water from her wings and made it to a thin line, to cut right through Captaino’s neck, it was like she cut through paper…
“Bastard-“
Captaino’s body fell limped and his head moved just slightly away from his body.
Dottore’s POV
“No— no, why—“
Dottore crawled up next to you. At the tip of the harpoon had your slowly pumping heart and the poor shattered vision was clinging on it, grasping for life but can’t.
“Zan—“
“Stop— I can fix this—“
(Y/n)‘s body was slowly starting to shake, her eyes were blurring up because of the amount of tears there were.
Dottore tried to touch her heart that was slowly decreasing by the second, but with little strength she had left she held his wrist weakly.
“Zandik- it's no use—“
“No- I can fix this—“
“Zan— just stop—“
Dottore looked back at her, then at her heart one final time; her heart stopped, her vision didn’t have that beautiful glow anymore.
“Za- remember when I said— *cough*
She coughed out some blood, crimson droplets dangling from her mouth.
“Remember— how I said… you can do so much in so little time— when you're close to someone…”
“Don’t say—“
“I’m— glad that I get… to meet someone like you— in such little time I had…
“Sweetheart-“ Dottore hold her right hand, “your— fuck— FUCK—“
“Zandik—“
“Yes- sweetheart—“
She moved her hand that was holding his wrist and moved her hand to his soft cheek.
“Stay strong for me, ok…”
“I— I can’t- I’m nothing; nothing, without you.”
“Zan—“
Everything felt blurred, her soft hand fell limp to the ground, her chest stopped slowly moving, her eyes was lifeless, her bright delicate smile was nowhere to be seen… Nahida ran in and sobbed what she witnessed, Al haitham quietly sobbed too.
“Sweetheart…”
Dottore had clumps of tears falling down on (Y/n)’s face.
“I’m sorry—“
Dottore slowly lowered his head and placed it on yours…
“I’m sorry— my little delicate sunflower…”
When a bird is alive... It eats ants. When the bird has died... ants eat it. One tree can be made into a million matchsticks... but only one match is needed to burn a million trees…
Circumstances can change at any time... Don't devalue or hurt anyone in this life... You may be powerful today but time is more powerful than you…
#Genshin impact#genshin#il dottore#genshin impact il dottore#dottore#zandik#genshin impact Zandik#il dottore x reader#Genshin impact fanfiction#Genshin impact Il Dottore x reader#genshin impact angst#Genshin impact Dottore x reader#Genshin impact Dottore x reader angst#al haitham#nahida#genshin nahida#genshin dottore#genshin al haitham#genshin fanfic#genshin impact al haitham#genshin impact Nahida#genshin impact capitano#Captaino#genshin capitano#genshin angst#Genshin impact sad fanfic#genshin fanfic sad#Genshin impact fanfic#genshin impact au#genshin au
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Xavier’s Revenge
Masterlist
Pairing: Xavier Thorpe x Hispanic!Reader
Summary: After Y/N pulled two pranks on Xavier, he decided to get her back. Since Xavier’s love language is physical touch, what will happen if he limited his affection?
Warning: Boyfriend!Xavier, Sad!Reader, angst?, maybe spelling mistakes
A/N: If i made the reader too sensitive or Xavier too distant, I’m sorry.
Xavier was in his room thinking about Y/N. She already pulled two “pranks” on him, two! Both pranks kinda played with his emotions. He was looking back at his interactions with Y/N before. Even when she called him by “Xavier” and when she didn’t say “I love you”, she still kissed him and hugged him, and was close to him. He thought back to that TikTok Ajax showed him of guy wiping off the kisses his girlfriend gave him.
That’s what Xavier got the idea; for a whole day, which is a bit ambitious in his mind and will probably break sooner, he is going to limit his affection. There will be no more kisses anywhere, no hugs, no physical or emotional intimacy whatsoever.
This was going to be hard on Xavier too because that’s how he shows his love, by physical touch, but it has to be done. It was late so he texted Y/N goodnight. Xavier had things to “plan”.
The next morning, it was Friday. Usually Xavier would knock on Y/N’s dorm, Yoko would let him in, and Xavier would wake her so they could walk together for breakfast on mornings he didn’t go to art shed. But this time he decided not to go to Y/N’s dorm and went to breakfast by himself.
Meanwhile Yoko was getting ready, she looked at the time and realized it was getting close to breakfast and Xavier hasn’t knocked on the door yet. She waited two more minutes before deciding to wake Y/N up herself.
“Y/N, girly, it’s time to wake up.” Yoko said, shaking Y/N. She stirred in her sleep, “In a minute Yoko, I’m waiting for Xavi.” Y/N said softly. “Yeah well Xavier didn’t come so I’m guessing he’s already at breakfast, now get dressed.” Yoko said. Y/N got up quickly, thinking to herself that maybe Xavier just forgot their little “tradition”. Maybe he’s not feeling well, Y/N made picarones last night with Eugene’s honey, maybe she’ll bring some for Xavier.
Y/N got dressed as quickly as she could, put on her earrings (because as a Hispanic, you get your ears pierced very young, for me it was when I was baby) and grabbed her container of picarones, took off the lid, said the incantation, and put the lid back on. She looked at her phone and realized she was 10 minutes late for breakfast. She walked out onto the quad really fast and found Xavier sitting with Ajax and the rest talking about who knows what.
“Good morning everyone, I’m Xavi, you didn’t come get me, are you feeling alright?” Y/N said, she tried to feel his forehead but Xavier lowered her hand before she got too close. “I’m fine, babe, promises. Sit down and have some breakfast, yeah.” Xavier said. Y/N noticed a weird shift in his behavior. She ignored it. “Um, I made those doughnuts I talked about the other day if you guys want some.” Y/N said. She opened the container and put it in the middle so everyone can grab one. Y/N grabbed one too, eating silently.
Enid noticed Y/N’s weird behavior but decided to not say anything until she got her alone. Breakfast continued until the bell rang. “I’ll see you in class, babe.” Xavier said. Y/N was gonna scoot over so she could kiss him but Xavier left the table before she could. Y/N frowned as she saw Xavier walk away. Enid waited for Y/N. “Hey, Y/N, are you okay?” Enid asked. “Um yeah, I’m fine, let’s just go to class.” Y/N said.
Enid and Y/N walked to class and when they made it, Wednesday was sitting next to Xavier. He would always save her a seat if she was running late, maybe the teacher said he could do that this time. Y/N went to the empty seat next to Ajax, maybe she can figure out what’s going on with Xavier.
“Ajax, do you know what happened with Xavier?” Y/N asked softly so the teacher couldn’t hear them. “I have no idea what you mean, he was normal yesterday.” Ajax replied. “Did his father say something or do you know if..” Ajax interrupted her. “Y/N, i can’t really talk about this right now, we can talk after class okay.” Ajax said, Y/N nodded silently. Y/N was having a hard time concentrating in class.
Coming from a Hispanic family, Y/N’s family was very loving and affectionate. The fact that she hasn’t received the kind of affection she was used to from Xavier made her feel sad. After class, Xavier went to the next one before Y/N was able to talk to him. The same thing continued for the next few classes until lunchtime. At lunch, Y/N got food and saw that Xavier was sitting between Ajax and Wednesday.
“Don’t you think you’re getting carried away?” Ajax asked Xavier, looking at Y/N’s face, which wasn’t her usual happy face. “I’m sure she’s fine, besides, she pulled two pranks on me, so I’m doing one back.” Xavier said. Then Ajax looked at him. “From what I remember, those pranks literally lasted, at most, 15 minutes. Each one was about 15 minutes, what you’re doing started this morning, just remember that.” Ajax said. Y/N walked to the table and sat next to Enid.
“So flaquito, i was thinking we can go into town later today.” Y/N said. “Yeah sure, we can go.” Xavier said. Xavier saw the way Y/N looked down at her food tray, playing with her food, struggling to finish. Y/N tried to finish it though. Xavier felt very guilty for what he has decided to do but he had to stay strong. The whole table felt very uncomfortable, Y/N being quiet wasn’t very common. Lunch was awkward until the bell rang and everyone went to either fencing or combat. Y/N said goodbye to those who had fencing, was going to kiss Xavier on the cheek goodbye but decided against it. Enid walked with Y/N to combat.
“Y/N, I don’t like seeing you this way, just talk to Xavier and see what’s going on.” Enid suggested. “I can’t talk to him, when I tried talking to him earlier, he completely left without me. I don’t know what’s happening.” Y/N said, when they made it to combat, Y/N had to spar with someone else to “challenge yourself” and she was paired with a gorgon, they were sparring but because Y/N’s mind was somewhere else, she twisted her ankle and fell on the mat.
“Y/N, are you okay?” The coach asked. “Yeah I’m fine, just give me second.” Y/N said and said the incantation to heal her ankle. She moved it around and it felt a lot better. She was going to get off the mat but the coach told her to sit out. “Your mind is somewhere else, can’t let you get hurt, even if you can heal yourself, sit out and watch what they do.” Y/N did as she was told, class was finished, she went to her next one until her school day was over. She left her bag on her bed in the dorm and walked to Xavier’s.
Xavier was laying down in bed when there was a knock on the door. “Corazón, It’s me, we need to talk.” He heard Y/N’s tired voice. He got up and opened the door. “Come on.” Xavier said and Y/N walked in. “What’s wrong?” Y/N said, trying to cup his face but Xavier moved back and that’s what broke Y/N, she nodded, she felt tears in her eyes but won’t let them fall. “You Don’t get to do that.” Y/N said.
“What am i doing?” Xavier asked. “You know what you’re doing! You’re trying to push me away, assuming that I would get so fed up with your attitude that I break up with you because apparently you aren’t mature enough to break up with me yourself. Look me in my eyes and tell me you’re breaking up with me because honestly, Xavi, you being distant hurts much worse than getting broken up with.” Y/N said looking up at Xavier, tears falling down. Xavier wiped Y/N’s tears with his sleeves and Y/N looked down. Xavier places his finger under her chin to make her look at him again.
“I’m not breaking up with you, I love you too much.” Xavier said. “That’s the first time you said it all day.” Y/N said. “I know, I’m sorry, Ajax showed me a TikTok of a guy wiping off his girlfriend’s kisses so I kicked that prank up a few notches.” Xavier said scratching the back of his neck. “I never meant to make you cry though, honestly. I am so sorry for making you think the worse.” Xavier said as he hugged her tightly so she will know that she’s still loved.
“What i did to you wasn’t this bad, was it?” Y/N asked curiously. She felt awful the entire day and wanted to know if she made Xavier felt that way. “No, of course not, angel, I swear you didn’t, what you did only lasted a few minutes. I’m pretty sure what I did affected you the whole day. Enid said you twisted your ankle.” Xavier said. “But i healed myself.” Y/N said. “Still, I’m sorry it went on too long, I really am. How about we go to the Weathervane. With Tyler gone, I’m sure the place will be so much better.” Xavier suggested.
“Sure, I can use some dessert. Let me go change and we can go, okay?” Y/N said. “Of course, darling, I’ll go by your dorm.” Xavier said, kissing Y/N before she left. Both Xavier and Y/N felt a lot better because Y/N thrives off affection and Xavier’s love language is physical touch so they’re both glad everything is back to normal.
Should I continue with the TikTok/Prank collection and write a couples video next time?
@pauphs
#xavier thrope imagine#xavier thorpe x reader#xavier thorpe#percy hynes white#wednesday#hispanic#hispanic reader#romance#latina#latinx
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Seeing Stars Pt. 21
Part 1 if you missed it!
The aftermath of Star and Eddie's big fight spills over into the lives of those around them. It takes them a few tries before they're able to talk again, both feeling hurt and defensive. What will it take for Eddie's stubborn nature to be derailed? What will be the thing that makes Star realize she has to confront her fears to grow? Eddie finds out from the source what Star went through in her past relationship. Star is left with no more reasons to deny that she's in love with Eddie.
CW: Descriptions of events that happened in an abusive relationship given by the victim. Not graphic but I still wanted to mention it. The abuser uses hurtful language toward the victim. Use of gay slurs by the abuser. A short conversation on men and women and their differences, it's a bit black and white and outdated so I wanted to mention that as well, gender roles and that. More fighting and more hurt. But also a light at the end of the tunnel.
-
Star survived the long lonely night after her and Eddie’s fight. She drove to school, painfully aware of the fact that she was very alone. She had only taken her sunglasses off if commanded by teachers. She was hung over, she felt like hell down to her bones. New depths of feeling hurt and terrible had been discovered.
She was shaking, watching the clock tick to lunch. She was starving and somehow also nauseous. She didn’t know how to face him. Would he act like nothing happened? Would he tell her to fuck off? She had no idea. So she acted in the way he had called her, and she hid in the bathroom for lunch. She wasn’t proud. She’d try again tomorrow.
Feeling defeated already, the universe felt it suited to further punish Star for withholding her feelings. If she wouldn’t open up and be vulnerable on her own, it could always beat her into submission. So it started with her car. Except that’s exactly what it wouldn’t do. Start. She was on the side of the road out of town and banging her head against the steering wheel. Unlike the guys in her life, she didn’t know much about cars. When your older brother is a great mechanic you never have to learn anything. She let out a groan before popping the hood to make it feel like she was doing something. That way when Robbie inevitably asked her what happened she could say she looked and that it wasn’t on fire at least. She grabbed her bags, locked up the car, and started the walk home. The dark clouds were a middle finger from the universe as it started to rain.
“I would say it can’t get any worse but I know you’ll prove me wrong and hit me with lightning or something so okay I GET IT!” She shouted alone on the side of the road with her arms in the air in annoyance. Luckily it wasn’t too long of a walk.
Tomorrow came, and she’d found Eddie completely ignoring her in their classes like the day before. He made her wonder if she’d gone invisible. She didn’t know he could act like that. But then again, she hadn’t expected him to blow up like he had either. Even if she was starting to understand it. She felt really strange about it. As heartbroken and sad as she was, she felt oddly… calm. She didn’t know that it was acceptance creeping in. Deep down she agreed with everything he’d said. She just had to realize it for herself now.
Greeting her was a not-unusual collection of mail on her counter Robbie had politely sorted for her. She knew the news couldn’t be any worse than the one she’d already got about Bobby so she flicked through them without much thought until one from a Chicago address came into view. Holding it with unsure hands she realized it was from the art scholarship group.
“I don’t even have to open this with the week I’m having do I?” She said aloud.
Sure enough.
“We regret to inform you you were not selected to receive-“ she sighed and tossed it into the trash can not bothering to read the rest. “Fucking great. So I’m stuck here with a guy I love that hates me now and I can’t even escape after graduation to be some shitty artist. Great.” She kicked the cupboard and immediately regretted it. “I guess this summer I’ll be working doubles until I collapse to save up, huh?” She plopped into the bed, full of disappointment in herself.
The next day she made it halfway to the Hellfire table. Eddie still ignoring her, she thinks she would’ve preferred if he was been glaring at her. Indifference hurt more somehow. So she turned at the last minute and sat with Robin. She didn’t ask why. At least not at the table. She did demand answers when it was just her alone, so Star gave in and went to Family Video to spill the beans to both her and Steve. Both were disappointed in her. Both were surprised at Eddie.
After rehashing everything with the Family Video duo, she felt a new wave of gloom wash over her. The bad news of the scholarship and an out-of-service car was enough to push her into old habits. She fell back on the old coping mechanisms she’d taken comfort in before and found herself at The Hideout. She wasn’t proud of it.
Unlike his usual behavior, Eddie took to the confines of the dive too. He knew he could be left alone to brood and have a few drinks. Fulfill some aesthetic of a heartbroken man wallowing in his self-pity for a bit. But he’d been wrong. Now he was trapped, unable to leave the corner booth where he’d hidden away because Star was busy drowning her sorrows across the bar. He had his hood up, zip-up black hoodie, and thankfully no major identifying articles of clothing like his vest. Star had been quiet at first, sulking and somber, sipping away at hard liquor and making small talk with the bartender she liked. The longer the night went on, the louder she got. In 2 hours she was singing karaoke and although it wasn’t bad, the articulation of her words was certainly lacking. Sad song after sad song she went, being ignored by the few other bar customers. It wasn’t hard to tell the poor girl was going through something, so they let it be. She was finishing up a Queen song, trying to sing every part, which was physically impossible, but that certainly wasn’t stopping her from trying. To Eddie’s surprise he saw Steve enter the bar, a noticeable sigh, then a fond smile, a shake of his head as he watched her perform. He took in the space around him. A leftover paranoia from his trauma always compelled him to know where exits were, see who was in the room, and check for danger. He missed waltzing into a room without a care, thinking he was untouchable.
He met Eddie’s eyes, and despite his hair being pulled back into his hood to make himself less noticeable, Steve recognized him. At first surprise, a step back and glancing quickly around the room. His face then shifted and gave him a look that Eddie had seen him give the kids. It was full of irritation and disappointment. Eddie’s eyes widened as he saw he’d been discovered, quickly shaking his head no, pleading with Steve through his eyes to not draw attention to him. Steve picked up on the situation quickly, crossed his arms, and rolled his eyes, head still shaking back and forth as he ran his hand through his hair and left Eddie’s line of sight to retrieve Star.
He was being gentle despite how annoyed he was, Eddie could hear him politely telling Star it was time to go. He heard Star perk up at his voice, saw her melt, and hug him around the neck tightly.
“Oh, Stevie. M’so glad you’re here.” she cooed, kissing his face.
“Alright, there hun.” Steve pat her back and rubbed it as she nuzzled into his chest.
“God you smell so good.” she groaned. Eddie felt heat rise in his face.
“Thanks,” he mumbled, knowing any response from him wouldn’t truly be heard. “Let’s go home. C’mon. Get your coat.” he instructed the wobbly lady.
“We gonna go to your place?” she asked.
“Do you want to?”
“Whatever you wanna do Stevie, baby.” she pat his cheek and Eddie scowled. “Wherever you wanna take me I’ll go,” she said with a bright smile and a nod. She was fully giving in, throwing her misplaced affections at Steve. He was handsome and sweet, and she was craving intimacy something awful. Of course, Steve had no intention of letting her try anything. Eddie was his friend, and Star was drunk. That wouldn’t stop her from acting out though.
“Let’s get you back home then,” he said putting his arm around her shoulders and directing her out of the bar. He shot daggers at Eddie one last time, a look of, 'see what you’ve done'. But to his surprise, Eddie was shooting them right back at him this time. Steve scrunched his face in confusion, shaking his head and turning his attention back to Star who had slid her hand into Steve’s back pocket.
“You gonna stay with me? I don’t wanna be alone.” he heard her whine as they walked out the door. Eddie didn’t hear Steve’s reply but he could certainly hear the blood rushing in his ears with jealousy.
-
So the next day she sat with them at lunch. Eddie was surprised but from a lifetime of hiding his emotions he didn’t give away anything at first. She tried to talk to him, fleeting moments of eye contact as he’d lower them to the table and give her sharp, short answers. He could see her hair hadn’t been washed that morning or the night before, he saw the way it lay flatter in the back because she’d slept on her back. Or had she been on her back for other reasons? He took in every inch of skin he could, any mark of redness or bruise pulling his attention and fueling his delusion that she’d slept with Steve. There was a red splotch on her neck, it wasn’t like the ones he’d left on her before but his mind wasn’t listening to reason. He was fuming, grinding his teeth down to nothing. Star could feel the anger coming from him now, assuming it was from her. The conversation kept moving among the other people at the table.
“I don’t know, I’ll ask Steve after school, I couldn’t get ahold of him last night.” Eddie’s eyes shot to Dustin, snapping the pretzel he had in his fingers.
“He was with me,” Star said casually and Eddie wondered if she was crueler than he had ever imagined she could be.
“Oh, did he say anything about this weekend?”
“No, sorry. Not that I remember anyway. But we weren’t really talking about him taking you all to the movies so I doubt it.”
“What were you talking about then?” Eddie hide his emotion, looking down as he asked then a pointed swing up as he saw Star turn her head with hopeful eyes that were matched with his, black with anger.
“We-uh.” she stuttered at the surprise of the question, and more so the fact that he was speaking to her directly at all.
“Or were you two not doing much talking?” he accused and she tilted her head in confusion. Everyone felt the wave of anger now, looking at Eddie with the same expression.
“I don’t-? I was…” she huffed, her cheeks turning red. “I didn’t wanna talk about it but I was drunk and he took me home,” she confessed, looking down, her hands fidgeting. She was ashamed. She looked at him defensively, turning in on herself, feeling hurt from his stinging accusation. Dustin glared at Eddie.
“Dude,” Jeff said sympathetically to Star at Eddie’s tone.
“Why are you talking to her like that?”
“If you’re so sore-assed about it maybe you should’ve taken her home.” Gareth, a surprising voice of reason caught Eddie’s attention as they stared each other down. No one knew exactly what had happened, they only knew Eddie was being a dick this week.
“Thankfully Steve was there to take care of me last night,” she said looking down, gathering her things as Dustin reached to stop her but she shook her head. “You’d be surprised what a little support and kindness would make a girl wanna do.” She stared right into Eddie's eyes as she stood. She was seething with anger. She wanted him to hurt, wanted him to think his friends had scorned him by sleeping together. She walked away with her tray and Eddie was left to be gawked at.
-
So naturally, the next question Eddie asked Steve when he went to Family Video the next day was direct and full of venom.
“Are you fucking her?” He almost growled at an unsuspecting Steve in the empty store. His eyes blinked rapidly, his hands raising between him and the glaring man across the counter.
“Woah, Woah. What?” Steve sputtered out.
“Don’t play stupid, sweetheart. I know you well enough to know you aren't.”
“That’s the weirdest compliment I’ve ever gotten,” Steve said bewildered.
“Stop avoiding the question.”
“No!” Steve shouted, now moving into being offended. “What the hell, man? You think I’d sleep with Star? Now? You’re off your meds, man. Don’t be crazy.”
“I saw her all over you at the bar.”
“She was drunk. You saw her. You know how she gets. She’s very friendly.” his nose wrinkled at the underselling of Star’s physical affection needs when intoxicated.
“And she’s pissed at me. Plenty of reasons to try it with you. I know she wants to fuck you. It’s the perfect storm to fuck me over.”
“Calm down,” Steve said in a drawn-out deep voice, leaning on the counter. “We didn’t do anything like that. I took her home, and all she did was cry over you.” he shook his head, his hair bobbing at the force.
Eddie blinked and leaned back in response.
“You think I’d sleep with her knowing you loved her? Good to know you think so highly of me, shit.” he leaned back and crossed his arms.
“I-” Eddie shook his head and put his hands to his face. “I’m sorry, Steve. Fuck.” he groaned. “I accused her at lunch and she-”
“You didn’t.” Steve groaned, his chin leaning forward “You idiot! Why would you do that!” he shook his hands at the run-down looking man across the counter.
“I don’t know. I’m all messed up. I saw her all over you and I saw red, man. I’m sorry.”
“All she did was sling snot and blubber on about how much she loved you but she couldn’t say it because what if she fucked it all up? What if she’s a terrible person and you find out and leave her? And you go and accuse her of sleeping with me? No offense but- you know, NO, FULL offense that’s bullshit!” Steve was angry on his behalf as well as Star’s now.
“I see that now,” Eddie muttered and hit his head on the counter in front of him.
“Get your shit together man, Jesus.” Steve scowled. “Go talk to her. Apologize. Don't be a dick. She’d never do that to you. I can’t believe you’d think that. And about me! I thought we were friends!”
“We are! I’m sorry. Old habits die hard.”
“You’d gonna die alone with your old habits if you don’t stop being such a stubborn jackass.” Steve pointed out, leaning down to Eddie’s mushed face on the counter.
“I know I hurt her, I thought she was trying to hurt me. I know she used to-”
“Yeah. USED TO. She even said that. That before she would’ve tried. To distract herself for a minute with someone else. But she wouldn’t anymore because of you. That she didn’t want to take a step back or hurt you. She was already upset she got so drunk.”
“Fuck.”
“Yeah. Fuck… you.” Steve said with a joking tone but there was truth behind it.
“Yeah, fuck me.” Edie groaned and hit his head a few times on the counter.
“Stop that shit. Someone’s gonna come in and 5150 you.” he shoved Eddie’s shoulder and he stood up.
“The Van Halen album?” Eddie asked, a bit dazed.
“Did you hit your head that hard?”
“Sorry I-”
“The more you say that the less it means you know.” Steve glared.
“What?”
“Sorry doesn't mean shit if it doesn’t come with changed behavior.”
“You sound like her.”
“Good! Because she’s smart! She’s trying to get better despite you being a baby and saying you were done with her because she couldn’t say she loved you back.”
“Wouldn’t you wanna hear it?” Eddie hit his hands on the counter, the weight of them making a heavy sound.
“Of course! But when she tells you she can’t because she’s afraid she’ll fuck everything up and then YOU go and leave, proving her right…what does that accomplish? Nothing! You need to see how much she loves you. She needs to be brave enough to say it and not think everything is gonna go to hell when she does. You’re both wrong and you’re both right.”
“I have the right to want to hear it from her. I’m not wrong.”
“That isn’t wrong, no. It’s how you’re going about it.”
“I deserve to hear it. I said she has to say it for me to be able to keep doing whatever it is we’re doing. I’m not even asking her to be my girlfriend, I just want to hear her say it.” Steve sighed, seeing the circles under Eddie’s eyes and the hurt behind them. He was just as sensitive as anyone else. So much for the whole macho tough routine. “If I don’t stick to my guns, then nothing I say means anything.”
“Yeah, you’re stubborn.”
“I’m not stubborn, I’m sticking to what I said.”
“Dude! That’s THE definition of stubborn.”
“Ugh!” Eddie threw his arms up. “It’s like everyone’s gone crazy this week.”
“If everyone around you is an asshole…. Chances are you’re the asshole.” Steve said with a lecturing face.
“I’m not the asshole here. Neither is she. I’m stating what I need from her. That’s it. That doesn’t make me the bad guy.”
“It doesn’t… not.” Steve bobbed his head side to side in thought. Eddie stared with a deadpan expression back at him. “Look, you’re asking her to do the one thing she can’t. That’s the issue. If you can't get past that then you need to tell her and drop it. End it. Completely.”
“But I love her, I don’t want to lose her.”
“You can’t have both.”
“Yes, I can. She’ll say it.”
“At least stop being an asshole to her in the meantime then? Just treat her like she’s your friend.”
“I can’t. If I’m around her I'll give in. I can’t act like she’s just my friend anymore I don’t know what that feels like. I’ve loved her for months now and I don’t know how to act.”
“Sounds like a you problem.”
“Now you’re being a dick.” he grumped at Steve.
“Yeah. That was me being a little bit of a dick.” Steve grinned. "Cut me some slack I’m stuck in the middle of you two. It’s not fun for you? Imagine how much it sucks for me to have to hear you both bitching and moaning?”
“Nothing about this is fun.”
“No shit,” Steve said sarcastically. “Love hurts, man. It sucks. It’s also the best thing that exists. It’s…” he sighed.
“Yeah. I know what you mean now.”
“First time, huh?”
“Yeah,” Eddie grumbled.
“I don’t have any happy metaphor for you man. My first love ended in flames. I won’t bullshit you.”
“I appreciate it.”
“Then don’t accuse me of sleeping with your…girlfriend…person situation.”
“Sorry about that.”
“Yeah, you should be.” Eddie sulked. “You’re a good guy.” Steve slapped his arm. “But even good guys can be assholes sometimes.”
“Not an asshole.”Eddie lilted, raising his head, his mood lighter but not chipper by any means.
“You’re not… not an asshole.” Steve clarified.
-
Thursday was awkward. Eddie felt like an idiot after what he’s said the day before. But Star braved his misplaced anger and sat with them anyway. If anything, she could use spite to be brave even if she was still hurt and sad. Eddie was apologetic with his eyes. They didn’t say much, but the intensity was certainly more tolerable. The group conversation flowed with no issue this time, Eddie answering like a sane person and Star doing the same. They exchanged a few words and kept it civil. She felt hopeful.
At the end of the day when Star shut her locker, she jumped at the appearance of Eddie after the door moving gave away his approach.
“Shit!” she squeaked and grabbed her bag. “You scared me,” she said, looking down immediately.
“I didn’t mean to,” he muttered, hands shoved into his pockets.
She stood with her face downward, fingers picking at the yarn in the strap of her bag, her eyes turned upward to meet his. She didn’t say anything, she didn’t know what to say.
“I wanted to apologize for what I said yesterday. At lunch.”
“Okay.” she nodded slowly, eyes wandering again.
“I saw you two in town that night and you looked… awfully cozy together.” he groaned out, eyes now losing their bravery as he too looked away.
“I was drunk. You know how I get,” she answered quietly, but the tone wasn’t lost on Eddie’s ears. I was drunk because of you, is what she’d wanted to add.
“Yeah.” he kicked at the linoleum floor with his sneaker.
“We didn’t do anything. Not that you’d have any right to be mad at us if we did." Eddie tilted his head and his nose twitched.
“I think I would have the right,” he muttered.
“You essentially told me to fuck off,” she stated plainly. “Or do you not remember storming out and saying you were done with my bullshit?”
“That’s not what I said.”
“It’s burnt into my memory because I’ve been crying about it for days, I’m pretty fucking sure that’s what you said.” she hissed back.
“Then that’s not what I meant! Okay?” he said back with the same defensive attitude she had.
“Then what did you mean?” the snarky attitude she was giving him wasn’t helping their situation.
“I meant…” he lowered his voice. “That whenever you were ready to give me the validation I needed to hear that I’m here. I didn’t mean I’m done with you, like, totally. I..” he groaned and sighed. “I love you, I don’t want you being with anyone else,” he mumbled, eyes paranoid and seeing if anything else was around to hear. “I meant I was done with… that conversation. There was no point in fighting more about it. It wouldn’t have helped.” he added with his exhaustion showing through.
“And I still can’t give you that,” she said entirely annoyed with herself and the situation, but Eddie took it for her not caring. He felt like a dagger had been shoved in between his 4th and 5th rib. “I’m sorry,” she added quietly. “I’m… trying,” she whispered, less angry as she saw the hurt in his body language. “I don’t know how to do this. I’ve never done this… felt this before. I’m not... equipped to deal with this level of shit.”
“So what we have is shit now?” he blurted out.
“No.” she whimpered, “You know that’s not what I meant.” she huffed and closed her eyes.
“That’s what you just said.” he bit back.
“Shit as in the overwhelming amount of emotions I’m having. Everything little fucking thing is triggering the hell out of me!” she admitted with a crack in her voice.
Eddie didn’t say anything, he sighed in response. They stood in painful silence for a moment.
“Well, I’m gonna go. This clearly isn’t going anywhere. I wanted to say sorry for accusing you of sleeping with Steve. And I did. What I said still stands. When you want to give this a real try, and man up to how you feel then come talk to me. Otherwise…we’re just going to argue.” he threw his hands up.
She didn’t respond as he turned and walked away. She felt the exhaustion hit her all over again. She missed him so much. She missed how he used to bring her comfort and not pain. She was sick and tired of feeling sick and tired. Something had to give.
Star was dehydrated she’d cried so much. She thinks if she tried again dust might come out of her eyes. She was drained. So she did what she knew, and sat at her kitchenette, her cards in her hands.
“Alright. Hit me with it.” she sighed.
The Star reversed slapped onto the table.
Star let out the first laugh she’d had since the argument.
“Yeah.” she let out a deep breath. “Fuck me, right?” she snorted and chuckled, rubbing her face. “Okay… Two card pull here.“ She says aloud, another shuffle. “If I tell him I’m in love with him. If I let myself be vulnerable enough to very likely fucking up... What’s gonna happen?”
The Lovers.
Star rolls her eyes and pulls another card.
10 of cups.
“If I had a dollar every time I pulled that when I asked you about him.”
“Then maybe you should fucking listen, you dumb bitch.” She heard in her head and laughed again.
“It’s too good to be true though. But… every time.” she tapped the 10 of cups card. “Is he really it?” she whispered, holding up The Lovers card. “Did you really send me a soul mate?” her face was sad, tired at even the thought of the effort it’d take for her to digest such a weighted statement. “Okay, so if I don’t tell him? At this point... why pull these? You’re going to hand my ass to me.” she slapped down a card.
Two of swords.
“Yeah, no shit.” she cringed.
Five of cups.
“Ugh.” she leaned away from the table, concerned. “Fuck.” she frowned and looked around as if something was going to jump out at her. “Tell me how you really feel.” she slumped back in the booth. She lovingly put the cards that had just rode her hard and put her up wet into their velvet holder. She sat, elbows on the table, chin on her hands, looking out the window. She wasn’t being left with a choice. Not if she was going to grow and change. What Eddie had said had hurt. Deeply. She wasn’t denying that there was truth to it though. How long was she going to stay like this? She wasn’t happy. It wasn’t working. And according to the cards she’d handed a gift she was shunning. So of course her life was going to shit. She had to adjust. She’d extend the olive branch, she’d figure out how to tell him. Somehow.
-
So then came Friday. She wore her Hellfire shirt, the same as the rest of them and Eddie was visibly tense. More so than usual before a session. She could feel it coming off him from where he sat at the table adjacent to her. Lunch was civil enough again. She hoped he wasn’t as angry as he had been the previous afternoon. She stopped him, waiting him out to be the last two to leave the table.
“Eddie?” she asked, his back facing her as he was walking away. His eyes screwed shut at the way she said his name. Man, he missed that.
“Yeah?” he asked, turning, his shoulder shifting with anxiety.
“I just wanted to say I’m really looking forward to Hellfire tonight,” she said with a subtle smile.
“You are?” he met her eyes, surprised.
“Yeah. I was looking forward to it as a distraction at the least. I’m sure you’ve come up with something brutal. Plenty of… fuel for that sort of thing.” she laughed nervously, tucking her hair behind her ear.
“I’ve put a lot of time into it this week,” he confirmed with a small nod.
“I was looking forward to seeing you too.” she offered, losing her nerve halfway through the sentence and looking away.
“Yeah?” a hint of hope in his upturned voice.
“Yeah.” she nodded chewing her lips. “I mean, it’s weird not seeing you. Talking to you.” she quietly added.
“Yeah.” was all he was managing to say. “I’ll see you tonight then.” he nodded and turned away. It wasn’t the warmest of interactions but it helped fuel Star’s optimism.
So she showed up early to Hellfire. She hoped to extend that olive branch. To show him she was trying. She wanted so badly to move past whatever this was that they were stuck in. If could just get through to him she was certain things could get closer to normal.
“Hey,” she said with bright eyes and a hesitant smile as Eddie was putting out the grid and making his control center.
“H-hey,” he said looking around, then to his watch seeing she was early. He hadn’t expected her to be early or alone.
“I thought I’d come early to talk.” she hesitantly stepped farther into the room. “Is that okay?”
“I mean… you’re doing it so…” he shrugged, anxious about her appearance. He saw the dejected look on her face at his response.
“I was hoping I could maybe… extend an olive branch, you know? I hate this weird disconnect, this animosity between us. I know it’s not good for anything, especially the campaign.”
“Yeah I’d been thinking about that.” he stood still and rubbed the back of his neck.
“I wanted to say that I get where you’re coming from, you know? I was hoping you had had time to think and see things from my point of view too. So maybe we could go back to talking to each other like…not like we used to but more like normal.”
“Star…” he sighed, and rest his hands on the table in front of him. “I said what I said. If you’re not ready, I can’t.” he saw the lump in her throat, and the shine in her eyes grow.
“I’m trying to meet you halfway. I’m trying. I want you to see that I’m trying.”
“Trying isn’t doing, sweetheart.” he shook his head.
“Don’t call me that,” she whispered, wiping away a tear before it fell. “Not like that.”
“I’m not trying to be difficult,” he said in an exhale.
“That’s good to know because it feels that way,” she admitted with a soft laugh, rolling her eyes and sniffling. “You have to try to do. And you being so cold and distant is making it harder. I can’t respond with love when I don’t feel it back.”
“You’ve been feeling it for months. It’s there. It’s just... I’m having a hard time too.” he admitted.
“Then we could make it easier on each other by trying to be normal again.” she offered with upturned hands.
“I can’t do that, Star.” he rubbed his face. “I’ll go back on what I said if I do.”
“And that’s SO terrible?” she snapped, covering her face after the outburst to hide the way it contorted with a building sob. “It’s so hard to see you and not be able to be myself,” she whispered, sniffling.
“Then maybe you should go?” he said calmly, his eyes sad as he looked up to find hers full of tears. “We’re both still emotional about this and I don’t want it to affect the session. It’s not fair to everyone else.”
“You don't want me in Hellfire?” her voice broke and her lip quivered.
“I mean you’re crying already and we’re not even fighting. It’s going to make you play poorly. It’ll distract me. Maybe sit this out until you figure your shit out?” he shrugged.
“Y-” she choked and stopped, looking away. “Fine.” she bit back, tears now proud on her cheeks. “I don’t see how I’m supposed to want to be with you when you’re picking this game over me.” she motioned to the table.
“Star, That’s not-”
“If you say that’s not what you mean one more time I’m going to fucking scream.” she hissed in a loud whisper. “Start saying what you mean instead of backtracking and maybe we could get somewhere!” she said fists balled and shaking.
“Maybe you should take your own advice,” he said back, his exterior so calm it made her infuriated. She said nothing, a huff, and a choked sound left her as she turned her heel and ran.
She sobbed in the girl's bathroom. She couldn’t control it. She’d run out of the theatre, and into the far wall of the bathroom where she slid down it into a lump on the floor.
Eddie hit the large wooden table so hard he worried he’d hurt his hands. He hadn’t meant to be so angry still. He was so cold. Too cold. She was trying but he couldn’t meet her in the middle. All he had was his word, and if he went back on what he said he’d do then his word would be nothing. He slammed himself into the throne, covering his face and groaning into his hands.
Dustin and his insatiable curiosity followed the sound of crying into the girl's bathroom. He hadn’t expected to find Star there, hiccuping as she was crying so hard. She met his eyes as he appeared, lip trembling before a cry broke from her throat, a wail that quietened only when she shoved her face into her sweater to dampen the sound.
“Holy shit, Star. What’s wrong? Are you okay?” he ran, sliding on his knees on the tile floor toward her.
“No.” she sobbed.
“Do I need to call an ambulance? The police? I’ll go get Eddie.” he began to rise and her hand shot to jerk him back into the floor so fast he was startled.
“No.” she said, wiping her face and raising her head. “He’s why I’m crying.”
“What’d he do? I’ll kick his ass.” he meant it and it broke Star out of her self-hating cycle.
“It’s my fault too.” she shook her head.
“I’ve never seen you like this, man. This isn’t normal. This seems like his fault.” he put his hand on her arm.
“We had a fight.”
“Oh.” he grimaced.
“Yeah.” she let out a wild-sounding laugh. “He kicked me out of Hellfire,” she said, looking at him and trying to stop her sobbing.
“He fucking WHAT?” he shouted.
“I tried to make amends. But he didn’t wanna hear it. He told me if I wasn’t there to apologize and do what he said that I shouldn’t come back. That me being there was too much of a distraction for him.”
“Eddie said that? Shit.”
“I fucked up, Dustin.” she whispered, shaking her head.
“Nothing could warrant him kicking you out of Hellfire.”
“Maybe it does.” she shifted and leaned against the wall, her eyes far away and unfocused.
“What happened?”
“I don’t know if he’d want me to say.”
“C’mon. Let me help.” his eyes were so kind, and his hand was so warm and comforting as he rubbed her arm. Star took a deep breath.
“He told me he loved me. But I couldn’t say it back. Even though I do. With the parole thing and the abuse from before I just… I’m having a really hard time. He got mad and told me I was a coward. And he’s right.” her lashes fluttered and she sniffled, wiping her face. “He told me he was done. Until I was ready to say it back he didn’t want anything to do with me.”
“He’s being a fucking asshole,” Dustin stated plainly. “I don’t know what’s wrong with him.”
“He’s right though. It happened over the weekend and I’ve been thinking a lot you know. And I thought that by coming here tonight I could start to make amends. But he…” her lip trembled and she whined, wiping her face again. “Don’t tell him any of that, please. I don’t want him more mad at me.” she grabbed Dustin's jacket and looked desperately into his eyes.
“I won't. I won’t. Don’t worry. I’m going to talk to him though.”
“I don’t know. I thought maybe I could do it you know. Stop listening to my ex’s voice in my head and maybe I could be with someone. Maybe I was worthy of it. But now he’s making me feel like I was right all along. That I’m not. Why can’t I just fucking say it back? It makes me feel like the world’s gonna end if I do. I hate it so much.” another sob grew.
“Star you’re a badass.” Dustin grabbed her face and shook it, her eyes went large from surprise. “You’re great. You’re a good person, you’re a great friend. I know you’d be a great girlfriend. You practically are Eddie’s girlfriend already. He’s just being a dick right now and I’m sorry. He’s a sensitive guy. I think he’s just acting out because he’s hurt too. But he needs to realize he’s not the boss. He can’t just demand things from you.”
“Thanks,” she mumbled from squished cheeks. “He was really mean tonight.” she whimpered.
“You should go home. I’ll talk to him. You shouldn’t have to be here while you’re this upset.”
“Okay,” she said meekly and it broke Dustin’s heart. She truly was defeated.
“Is there anything you want me to say to him? I can relay a message since he wasn’t willing to listen to you. I’ll make him fuckin’ listen.” he said angrily.
“Yeah I made him some things,” she muttered and dug through her bag. Dustin's shoulders slumped, seeing the formerly strong girl broken down to next to nothing in front of him. “I mean you can have it.” she handed a large cookie to Dustin, wrapped in plastic cling film. “It’s his favorite,” she whispered.
“It’s a D20.” Dustin grinned, hard icing tracing out numbers on its surface.
“I thought it was cute. He likes the hard icing.” she swallowed audibly. “I thought if I made him something he’d see I cared.” her bottom lip trembled.
“I’m so sorry he was such a dick.” Dustin looks at her with pity and she hated it but she needed it.
“I know.” she nodded, wiping her face and sitting up straight. “I also made him this but I wanted to give it to him myself. I don’t know if he’ll talk to me.” she shook her head and held out a cassette. “Don’t open it. There’s a letter inside for him. It’s… personal.”
“I won’t. Promise,” he says holding her hands as she extended it to him. “I’ll make him take it. And promise me he’ll read it. Okay? It’ll be okay.” he promised her with a nod and crooked smile.
“Thanks, Dustin. I don’t know that I deserve all this but thank you.”
“Don’t listen to him right now. He’s just hurt. He’s a stubborn dick when he’s got his feelings hurt.” Dustin rolled his eyes. “You go home and rest okay? I’ll handle this.”
“Thanks. You’re a really good guy. A really great friend. I mean it.”
“Shush, I know.” he grinned and stood, holding his hand out to help her up. “Let’s get you out of here.”
-
“What’s your fucking problem you absolute dick head?” Dustin strutted into the Hellfire Club chest first.
“Excuse you?” Eddie said with high brows.
“He kicked Star out of Hellfire.” he stood and declared it to the group, jerking his seat back and not taking his eyes off Eddie. He wanted him to be publicly shamed.
“You what?”
“What the fuck dude?”
“She was really good!” all came in a chorus of annoyed members.
“Shut up!” Eddie screeched and everyone leaned away, surprised. “That’s not what happened. You shouldn’t be throwing around accusations when you don’t know what you’re talking about.” Eddie gritted through clenched teeth.
“I do know. I just talked to her. I found her crying in the bathroom because of you, you asshole.” Dustin was pissed, and Mike was side-eyeing him, impressed and also scared at what Eddie might do. “She came here trying to make amends.” he raised his voice at the glaring man opposite him at the other end of the table, now standing with his hands on the table. Dustin looked at the group. “They had a big fight over the weekend, that’s why she’s been so weird and Eddie’s been such a pain in the ass,” he announced to the other members, meeting their eyes as they nodded and groaned, now understanding. “She brought you this.” she tossed the cookie down the table and it slid to a stop in front of Eddie. “But you were too busy being mean for her to give it to you.” It split on impact, and he looked just as sorry as he felt at that moment. “It’s your favorite.” Dustin spits out.
“Did she tell you what happened?” he asked, now less boisterous. Eyes not leaving the rifted cookie.
“No. She said you fought. She wanted to respect your privacy even after you were a grade-A piece of shit to her tonight.” He crossed his arms. The exact comment hit Eddie like a knife. That’s what he’d called her ex. That’s what he said he wasn’t. Shit. “I’m here to play. But this isn’t over. I’m talking to you after this.” he pointed his finger angrily at Eddie.
“She would’ve been a distraction from the campaign.”
“C’mon.” Gareth, to everyone's surprise, groaned. “So you and your girlfriend had a fight. Put on your big girl panties and deal with it.” Gareth gave a much-needed pushback to Eddie’s stubborn stance. “She’s a member of this party. We get a say in who comes and goes. You’re the DM, you aren’t God.” he sassed back and Eddie blinked with a blank face. “I’m here to play too. But this is about D and D, not your feelings.”
“Okay then. She can come back next session.” Eddie raised his hands in defeat.
“If she’ll come back.” Jeff says with a more subtle lecturing look toward Eddie.
“If she doesn’t I’m gonna be so pissed at you, dude,” Gareth says with a shake of his head. “Her stats were just getting good,” he mumbled.
“Fine!” he slapped the table to break the subject. “Let’s get this fucking going.” he said loudly as he plopped back into his throne.
The session was fine, Eddie went a little too hard on them but no one fought him about it. They understood why.
Dustin sat in his chair with his arms crossed, waiting for everyone else to clear out.
“So?” he says with a sassy bob of his head. “Since when do you make girls cry, huh?”
“I didn’t mean to. Not really. I might’ve gone a little too hard on her.” he said, sitting on the tabletop beside the judging younger guy.
“A little? She was hiccuping on the bathroom floor from crying so hard. That’s not you being “a little too hard” on her.” Dustin scowled and use air quotes.
“I couldn’t have her here tonight. I wouldn’t be able to think straight. I’m a fucking mess about all this. Is that what you want to hear?”
“YES!” he screeched, his arms going up in the air. “Maybe if you’d brought this kind of honesty, to begin with we wouldn’t be having this conversation!” Eddie rolled his eyes and slumped, his hands on the edge of the table by his thighs. “Look, she gave me this,” he said pulling out a cassette and Eddie’s brow lowered in surprise and hesitation. “I told her I’d give it to you and I told her I’d make you promise to listen to it. She said there’s a letter in it.” he held it out and Eddie took it, looking it over. “She’s really sorry. I’ve never seen her like that, man she was fucked up over you. She really loves you, Eddie.” Eddies eyes snapped to Dustin's.
“She said that?” his voice gave away a certain desperation.
“Yes.” Dustin leaned forward and nodded.
“Then she should say it to me. Why is she saying it to you?” he deflected again, back to brooding.
“Well, she’s not in love with me so I don’t think those two things are comparable.” Dustin snarked.
“I just want her to tell me,” he whispered and Dustin softened his approach.
“She would if you’d give her the chance. She said some super depressing stuff about her ex. She’s still really messed up from that, you know.”
“And how long am I supposed to just wait and act like I’m not in pain every time I’m around her? Huh? It physically hurts to be around her I love her so much.” he gritted out, still looking angry despite the soft subject. “And I know she loves me. She did everything but say it when she was drunk. She even said she feels it but can’t say it. What the fuck does that even mean?” he groaned and hung his head.
“I think you’re being selfish,” Dustin said calmly.
“What the fuck, man? Are you hear to make me feel like shit or talk about this?”
“I’m not trying to, you feel guilty and you’re feeling that way all on your own.” he said with a confident turn up of his chin. Eddie turned away and glared at nothing in particular.
“What if I am? Don’t I have the right to? I’ve been the dirty little secret for most of my love life, do I not deserve to hear it if it’s true now? I feel like she’s being selfish by not saying it to me. Because she knows it’s true. She’s being a baby about it.”
“You’re in so deep you don’t even know it.” Dustin chuckled.
“What?”
“You’re in love bad. You’re getting possessive. That’s how being in love goes bad. You think you’re entitled to something from her. You know better.” Eddie glared, unhappy with the truth coming from the little shitty sage. “You’re acting just like one of these assholes that bully us.”
“That is NOT fucking fair.”
“I think if you were honest with yourself you’d agree.” Dustin stood, leaving Eddie to sulk. “Maybe do that meditation stuff she talks about. Really think about it. Listen to what she has to say.” he motioned toward the cassette. “Maybe what you want is right there.” he shrugged, grabbing his bag.
“Unless it’s a recording of her saying she loves me back it’s not.”
“Quit being such a stickler for rules. I can’t believe I’m saying that to you.” he rolled his eyes.
“I said what I needed. I’m sticking to my word!” he said with a pointed finger.
“Rules are made to be broken, man. What can I say? Think of it this way, would you withhold affection from an abused dog?”
“That’s a messed up comparison, Henderson,” he said feeling defensive of Star.
“No! Hear me out. A stray shows up and it’s scared right, it's clearly been abused by someone before. Do you get mad when the dog snaps or cries or runs away? No. You understand that it has to learn that YOU won’t hurt it. YOU have to be in control and not get mad and hit it when it snaps or growls. You have to be patient with it.” he chopped his hands at Eddie. “Star had a bad owner before. He taught her she was bad and wrong and to expect to be hit. And how are you fixing that point of view for her right now by doing this?”
“It’s not the same.”
“Is it not?” Dustin said with a low brow, his head tilted and a tone full of disappointment. “You show her you love her by loving her, dude. It’s that simple. You can't demand she all of the sudden open up after she’s been told that opening up is the worst thing that she could do. Do you get it? She’s scared. That’s why she was such a tough nut to crack when she first showed up. You see how much she’s changed. If you’d keep supporting her like you have, she’ll be able to change. Just like she has with other stuff.”
Eddie looked away, not knowing what to say because he knew the child genius was right.
“It’s Psych 101 man.” Dustin continued to rub salt into the wound with his words.
“Okay! Fine. I get it. Shit, man.”
“No shame in being wrong. You can apologize,” he said walking back towards the door. “I’m looking forward to telling you I told you so!” he called out as he walked out of the room.
Eddie snarled, his nose wrinkled as he glared at the cassette. He put it in his bag and went on to put away everything else before heading home.
The tape mocked him that next day. He went to band practice, ran errands, and ignored it. He was now mad at himself and not just her. He smoked himself stupid and fell asleep. If he’d had more money he would’ve added some drinking to the mix. He hadn’t felt so emotionally drained in years.
He woke up sweaty, Wayne was already asleep, back from work in the living room. The sounds of the first frogs he’d heard since summer ended were croaking in the puddles around the trailer park. He shut his window, taking his comforter with him across the room. He sat back down on his bed and his bag sat there looking back at him.
“Okay.” he sighed and stood, still dramatic even alone. “Let’s do this.”
He took his portable radio and sat with it on the bed, plugging his headphones into it. He opened the cassette with its pink broken heart on the front and a letter, folded up tumbled out. He saw the label on the cassette, C120, and became more interested. This was two full hours of music. She’d put work into this. What he didn’t know was that she’d been working on it for days, from the time she got home to her falling asleep listening to the radio for inspiration. She’d put her heart and soul into the flimsy plastic rectangle.
He snapped the tape in and unfolded the sheet of paper. One side was simply a tracklist. It was written out beautifully in ink, he’d always admired how pretty her handwriting was with its loops and leans. The other side was a simple message.
“We know I’m not good at saying these things. The songs can say it better than I ever could. Listen to the lyrics. Please. I hope they tell you all you need to know.”
Another chunky square had fallen out of the squeezed-in paper. He dug around it, unfolding the intricate bends. He saw a flash of orange. He pulled out the Get Out Of Jail Free Card he’d given her. He cracked a smile, feeling a hint of tears in his eyes. He’d practically forgotten. On the inside of the paper around it, concealing it until he took he time to open it was also simply stated.
“Forgive me.”
He sighed, looking at the card, he put it to his mouth, tapping it against his lips in thought. It even smelled like her. He wondered where she’d been keeping it all this time. He had to play by the rules of the card. He had to forgive her. She’d held onto his silly little gift and remembered it this whole time. He owed her for the sentimentality it showed in the gesture. She really did love him, didn’t she?
Eddie clicked the tape on, mouth dry and fingers fidgeting on the edges of the paper. Looking over the track list it was apparent that this mix was not for him. It wasn’t music catering to him, it wasn’t metal or thrash or a collection of songs he liked. It was all songs that were distinctly Star. He could feel her in the choices. First, a gut punch of nostalgia with Fleetwood Mac. He recalled her singing and dancing, how he’d spent so much time learning new songs just for her. And she was always appreciative of each one. Even if he didn’t quite get every chord just right. A throwback to an evening with Wayne with her favorite Dion song.Then Maggie May. She memorized every song and every emotion attached. He felt a little nauseous, she had remembered. She’d remembered that post-Valentine’s night this whole time. Moving out of nostalgia he listened to songs that spoke to him directly in the lyrics. Stumblin’ In, Right Down the Line, I Saw the Light. They all told him what he needed to hear. He sat there, unmoving for hours. He rewound and listened to some over, he read her letter again. He finally laid back, Otis Redding in his ears. He looked to the window and the sun was up, he didn’t even know for how long. He stared at the stain on his ceiling, hand to his chest, hearing Star tell him how much she truly did love him through someone else’s words.
“But it seemed so natural darling, that you and I are here. Just talking over cigarettes and drinking coffee. And oh, my whole heart cried out love at last I’ve found you. And honey won't you just let me build my whole life around you?” he let the tears fall. Finally. The warm brass sounds pulled them out of him. He wiped them away, but not denying their existence this time. He sat up, switching off the tape, his ears suddenly cold from being housed in his headphones for hours. He put the papers in his bedside table, somewhere to keep them safe and close to his other prized possessions. He snapped the tape back into the case and put it into his bag. He stretched and took a deep breath, shaking off the anger he’d felt before. He had to go to her. He‘d forgive her and he could take it slow. Music was a love language for Eddie. It was also Star’s. By showing him in a way he could hear and feel, she’d been able to get through to him. He could feel she did love him. There couldn’t be lyrics like that that resonated with her if she didn’t love him. For her, he would try to be patient. He would apologize. He’d probably have to beg and maybe deservedly so. For her, he’d do anything.
Eddie had jumped into the shower, leaving without a word to Wayne, speeding to Star’s house with the tape in the console. To his dismay, she wasn’t there. No one was. Everything was locked and shut. He took the key he had, and let himself in her trailer, there was an old suitcase out, and a letter on the countertop.
“Shit. That’s tomorrow,” he whispered. The parole hearing. “Fuck.” he shouted out in frustration. They’d left early. He’d missed her. Being back in her space made the last words he’d said there smack him in the face. He’d promised her he’d be there for her for that. He felt another wave of nausea. “Oh god I really am an asshole.” he whispered.
Wayne was awake when Eddie returned, another morning just like the last, sipping his coffee on the front porch. He was no stranger to Eddie driving like a maniac. But Eddie leaping from the van and stumbling up the stairs was new.
“You okay?”
“I'm going to Chicago.” he said before disappearing into the house.
“What in the Sam Hill?” Wayne muttered as he followed him inside. “Now?” he followed Eddie to his bedroom, dumping the school contents of his backpack onto the bed and shoving things he’d need for a long drive in. “I didn’t think ya’ll would head out until later, maybe leave before dawn tomorrow.”
“Yeah, neither did I. I’ve been so caught up in being mad at her that I forgot. I didn’t forget I just… I didn’t think about it.”
“So that’s why she’s not been here and you’ve been sulking.” he nodded and took a drink.
“Yeah. We had a big fight. And she wrote me a really sweet letter and apologized and I’m seeing that I’m the asshole in this situation.” he shook his head, scoffing at himself. “I didn’t get it until this morning and I went to her place to apologize and she’s gone. So… I’m going to Chicago.”
“Do you know where to go?”
“I know the name of the prison. I can figure it out.”
“I'll grab a map.” Wayne said, calm amongst Eddie’s chaos. Eddie soon bound into the living room with his bag on his shoulder. “Here.” he handed Eddie a folded-up map. “Just in case.”
“Thanks. I’ll be back sometime Monday afternoon I think. I’ll call if I need to.”
“Take this too,” he said with a fatherly tone, holding out a 50-dollar bill to him. Eddie stared at it for a moment.
“No way, that’s too much. I don’t need that.”
“Take it.” he shook it at him.
“No, that’s too much Wayne, I’ve got gas money, I’m fine.” he insisted. Wayne took it and shoved it into his boy’s pocket.
“You say thank you when people give you things, Eddie. I raised you better than that.”
“Thank you.”
“That’s better.” he grinned and fixed Eddie’s collar. “Mind your manners when you find her, alright?”
“I will.” he nodded. “I”m gonna fix this. I’m gonna come back with her. It’ll be okay. It’ll work. Like you said. Me and her we’re… we’re supposed to be together.”
“C’mere.” Wayne said bringing him in for a hug. Eddie felt small in his father figure’s arms. They didn’t NOT hug, but it wasn’t a daily occurrence by any means. Eddie hugged him back, slow on the draw. Wayne pat his back. “You’re a good man. You’ll figure it out. Plenty of time on the drive to figure out how to beg her forgiveness.” he grinned at him, pulled away, and slapped his shoulder supportively.
“Yeah. Lots of that.”
“You be careful.” he wagged a finger at him. “And remember what I taught you about women. Don't make me look bad.” his tone was serious but he said it with a smile.
“I won’t let you down.” a promise to his uncle and himself.
“You never do.”
-
Eddie drove with Star’s tape blasting, shaking the metal of the van for hours. He cried, screamed, and talked to himself. The long hours of the highway gave him plenty of time to playback everything everyone around him had been saying. He could eat the I told you so’s with a smile if it meant having her back and happy again. He hoped his ego hadn't done irreparable damage.
He drove for hours in the city, finding the prison then seeing the parking wasn’t 24 hours. So he went on another adventure to find overnight parking somewhere. He figured a parking garage with a security guard at the gate was the safest bet to not get carjacked. He took a short walk, some blocks to find a place to eat. He took it back to the van where he played her tape at a much lower volume in his portable stereo not wanting to drain the van battery too much. He ate what might’ve been the best pizza of his life and talked to himself for hours. He had a method to his madness. He practiced apologizing, going over what he might say when he saw her. He tried to cover every retort and response he could think of.
-
Star had one place in mind she wanted to go upon returning to Chicago. She was someone Star’s mom had liked. She was part of the reason her name was Star. Robbie waited outside, not willing to leave Star alone or get involved with any of her hippy-dippy shit. His words.
The place smelled like incense and years of cigarettes. It smelled like home to Star. Through beaded curtains and shimmery drapes, she walked down the floor of stairs and into the small business.
“Would it be to cliche to say I was expecting you?” An older woman with wise eyes and a welcoming demeanor sat at her small round table. The entire space was covered in jewel tones and occult paraphernalia. The neon sign with a palm and the word psychic across the top buzzed and gave a glow to the sacred space.
“Just a little.” Star smiled and was welcomed into the arms of the woman. She was someone she’d sought out during hard times for guidance, especially after her mom had passed. She was a big part of who Star was now.
“Are you okay? I thought you were running when you left? Oh, wait no don’t answer that. You know I like a challenge.” She said spiritedly with her long layers of skirts and shawls flowing with animated arms. “Is this business or pleasure?”
“Both as always.” Star sighed contently and sat in the worn thatch chair across from the whimsical woman.
“Do you want your cards?”
“No, I’ve been doing them a lot and they’ve been very rude.” Star chuckled.
“You’ve kept up your studies?” The woman perked up at the news.
“I’ve never been more into them.”
“But?”
“I still need guidance.”
“Are the cards not clear?”
“Too clear. I kinda wanted to see what my guides had to say. I’m not good at tuning into them and certainly not like you can.”
“They’re annoyed.” She laughed. “Proud and annoyed.”
“Can’t blame them. Things have been weird lately. I’ve been struggling.”
“They’ve been trying to take care of you.” She looked around the room at times and others shut her eyes. Star sat amidst a realm she couldn’t touch yet. “But you’re fighting it. They don’t like being ignored when they work so hard to reach out.”
“I should say it shouldn’t I?” A question vague enough for the woman to not know what she meant. But her guides did.
“A resounding yes.” She nodded. “I’m seeing… two things?” She tilted her head, her eyes narrowing as she tried to see something more clearly. “Whatever these two things are they’re okay. Oh, it’ll be okay. You’ll be okay.”
“Good news.”
“They’re showing me…” she held out her two hands as if she were weighing something. “A good thing and a bad thing. They’re not being very clear sorry.”
“Outcomes?”
“No.” She paused.
“Oh, men.” Star nodded. “A good man and a bad man.”
“They seem to be happy with that answer.” “One is being tossed over the shoulder and forgotten. The other..” she giggled. “The other they're acting like they’re kissing something in their hand.” Star laughed.
“Eddie.” She grinned.
“Oh, they like him.” The woman laughed. “Tell me more about this Eddie.” She leaned in like a gossip. “There’s a man in your life already? So soon.” She seemed happy but curious.
“I said the same. I thought he was too good to be true.”
“Smart girl.” She nodded her hand to her chin. “You can ask them about him. They’re open to it.” Star pondered for a moment.
“I know the cards have told me I should be with him. Soul connections and whatnot. We’ve channeled each other before. It’s very intense. Is that all true?”
“There’s a box with a bow. Like a Christmas present.”
“I don’t know.”
“Oh! He’s a gift!” She laughed, amused.
“But am I the same for him? Or am I a lesson for him?”
“Don’t shoot the messenger but I’m being told to tell you to not be stupid.” Star snorted out a laugh.
“I’m trying.” She sighed. “So I should go against all my instincts and go balls deep, deep end of the pool with Eddie? Full in love and believing in soul mates and all that?” Star didn’t look convinced.
“Oh hello, darling.” The woman cooed. Star sensed she wasn’t talking to her. “Yes. Live the life I couldn’t.” The woman sighed. “She was always so sweet, wasn’t she? She loved you so much. Still sacrificing even now to give you good things.” Star softly smiled.
“I miss her.” Star pouted unintentionally.
“She knows.” a warm smile and nod from her mentor to ease her fear.
“I’ll do it for her, I’ll believe in fairy tales.” Star huffed out an uncomfortable laugh and wiped at her cheek.
“Believe in yourself.” The woman confidently said. “Open up your heart. That’s where your higher self is.”
“And becoming my highest self is the goal of this trip, this realm.”
“What scares you most shows you where you need to grow the most. You’re still cynical. For good reason, my dear but letting go of that and trusting the universe will care for you is the next step.”
“Hard to take the next step when you can’t see the stairs” Star sighed and stared at nothing.
“That’s why love is blind, sweetheart. You don’t have to see the stairs to know it’s there.”
-
Eddie set his watch for dawn, not knowing when to expect Star. So, he was going into the prison lot as the workers were. He parked out of the way, not wanting to draw attention to himself. Just being at a prison made him nervous. He thought the weird metal guy sitting in his van alone was suspicious enough, it’d be worse to stand at the gate and wait or be parked in the middle of everyone else and have them stare him down. Again, he waited hours.
9 am was the start of the parole hearings for the day. Like the prisoners, no one else knew when they would be called. So Eddie waited with burning eyes, watching the entry gate. Eventually, Robbie's truck pulled in. He saw him taking up a good portion of the cab and Star with her head against the window. Unlike the last time she had to speak in front of people she looked like herself today. He watched as they pulled in like him, a little out of the way. Eddie got out of the van. Taking a deep breath and then checking it to see just how bad it was. So a stick of gum was shoved into his mouth at the last second.
Star was feeling numb. Only because she was feeling so much she couldn’t compute it anymore. Robbie held her around her shoulders, half comforting and half making sure she didn’t run. She’d been so quiet the whole ride. The whole night in the hotel. She’d barely eaten and the one thing she missed the most about the city was the food.
Robbie saw Eddie before she did. Even his jaded heart lept a little at the site of the goofy guy. His hands were clenching and unclenching, slowly walking away from the entrance and toward them.
“Star?” Robbie said softly to not startle her.
“I’m fine.” She mumbled, still looking at the ground.
“Star.” he demanded again, this time in a deeper voice.
“What?” She said with a tired voice, looking up at Robbie.
“Look who showed up.” He had such a warm smile on his face Star was gobsmacked. Robbie didn’t smile like that. He nodded his head toward the already very apologetic-looking man tentatively approaching her, almost tripping over his feet as he dragged them.
Star turned with a low brow and her eyes landed locked with Eddie’s as if she’d been aiming for them. She stopped moving, involuntarily. Her face fell, mouth dropping open as he approached. She could swear there was a faint ringing in her ears from the shock. Her breath caught in her throat and she felt a wave of tingly ice move across her skin. Robbie stayed by her side as she shakily took steps forward. A sob erupted from her throat, but for the first time in a long time, it was accompanied by a smile. She took another step, another sob rocking her torso. She held her hands out with no shame in her desperation for Eddie who started jogging towards her, his frightened body language switching seamlessly to caregiver. She picked up her pace, leaving Robbie behind as her knees gave out on impact with Eddie’s chest. He lifted her into a hug, her feet leaving the ground and kicking up. She gripped him with white knuckles and sobbed loudly into his chest. He held her as tightly as he could and pressed his face to her hair. His tears fell then too, he didn’t sob like her but his cheeks were wet in the early light just the same. He held her, letting her sob. Ugly choked gut-wrenching sounds left her small body. It was a release she’d needed desperately.
“Man am I glad to see you.” Robbie said with a hand to Eddie’s arm.
“Wouldn’t miss it.” He smiled back, only his wet lashes giving away he was crying too.
“I told you not to give up on this idiot.” Robbie grinned, rubbing Stars back.
She cried something unintelligible.
“You’re gonna have to use your words, kid. Breathe for a second. It’s fine. Your knight in shining armor is here.” There was no ill will towards Eddie for Robbie. He’d known from the moment Star cried about their fight that he’d come back. Eddie wasn’t a quitter. He knew the guy that much. Everyone has fights, and he knew Star was admittedly hard to love sometimes. But she had people around her that were the same way. When you found your people like that you didn’t give up on them. He knew Eddie was one of their people. First loves were intense and these young fools were no exemption to the rules of messing things up when emotions ran high. Robbie's years of experience told him that with time, the two bumbling goobers he had watched fall in love would be just fine.
“I’m here.” He spoke softly in her ear. “I’m sorry. I’m so sorry.”
“M’Sorry.” She blubbered out as he smiled wide at her pitiful little red face. He took his handkerchief out of his pocket and wiped her cheeks then squeezed her snotty nose. She cracked a smile through her quiet tears and took the cloth to clean herself up.
“There she is.” He put his hands to her cheeks. “There’s my pretty girl.” He watched her face screw up into a comedically deep frown as he laughed and kissed her forehead.
“Y-yours?” She shakily breathed in.
“Yes. I’m sorry. Okay? We can talk about it later. Today's about you right?”
Y-yeah.” She nodded.
“Just know I’m here for you, okay? I’m sorry I made you doubt that.”
“Did you get my tape?” She asked with big bright glossy eyes.
“That’s what snapped me out of it. I'm sorry I doubted you. I was just so used to being a secret, a backup plan, a story to tell, you know? But I’m here now. I hope that counts for something.”
“It does.” She said finally losing her quivering voice. “I’ll fight you later, kay?” She gave him a soft smile and she saw a tear fall down his cheek as he beamed down at her, squishing her cheeks and kissing her pooched lips.
“You can hit me with your car if you want, I know you’re good at that.” He joked and got a laugh out of her.
“That would make me feel better.”
“Yeah? It’s a date then.” He kissed her forehead and squeezed her.
“No sex on the first date but murder is okay.” She said into his chest as she felt him warm and laughing around her.
“I missed you so fucking much.” He said pulling her away to kiss her cheek.
“I missed you more.” She admitted with a crooked smile, it and the statement made Eddie’s heart flutter for good reasons now.He kissed her briefly again.
“I’ve got you today alright? Whatever you need I’m your slave. Got it?” He smoothed her hair down and wiped some errant mascara off her cheek.
“Hold my hand and don’t let go until I say.” She stated as her first order. He stood next to her and laced their fingers together. He stood up straight and she mirrors him. He lifted her chin back up.
“Lead the way, boss.” He said with an approving nod, holding his free hand out for her to take the lead.
They sat on the uncomfortable wooden bench outside the room for hours. Star had her headphones on for a good part of it, Eddie sat next to her, only breaking their handhold to put his arm around her and take her hand with his other. She’d fallen asleep on him, he’d been stroking her hair and rubbing her back and she’d fallen into the missed lull of safety only he could bring her. Eddie looked down at her for the longest time, smiling and kissing her head.
The woman across from them watched them with an adoring smile.
“She have to speak against someone too?” She asked, giving the information that she too was there for the same reason.
“Yeah,” Eddie said softly, rubbing Star's arm.
“First time?”
“Yeah.” He nodded again.
“She’s lucky to have you “ she gave a sad smile.
“Nah.” He shook his head and chuckled. “I’m lucky she puts up with me.” He said wholeheartedly.
“You’re the boyfriend then?” The woman grinned. Eddie paused, his mouth open trying to figure out how to answer that.
“He is,” Robbie answered. “More like the husband.” He smirked from behind his magazine. The woman looked over at him in surprise as he joined the conversation. “I’m her older brother.” He added to give context. Eddie had blushed at Robbie's words. “I’m here for moral support since I dealt with her going through this the first time around with her piece of shit ex.”
“Ah yes. Same here. She reminded me of me my first time back here.” She gave Star a sad smile even though she couldn’t see it. “It won’t be so hard next time.” She said kindly, looking to Eddie. “It won’t be easy but there’s a fear that first time.” She shook her head. “You don’t get the same fear after that.” She sighed. “If she can get through putting him in there she can do anything. Remind her of that when she needs it.”
“Thanks,” Eddie said softly to not wake her. “I never know what to say because I can’t relate you know? It’s hard to understand sometimes.”
“Because you’re a man.” The woman chuckled. “No offense, but you can’t understand what it’s like dealing with a man like that unless you’re a woman. There are certain things you just can’t understand. It’s something that makes us different.” She shrugged. “The world is different for us. It’s harder in ways you don’t have to deal with. Just be there for her, listen to her. Believe her.”
“That’s what I plan on doing.” it was Eddie’s turn for a sad smile as he thought about how he’d failed her.
The woman let out a content sigh. A small sign of hope in the young couple.
She came and went before them, Star waking up as the doors opened and the next was called. She’d turned to read the list she’d written. She didn’t know if she’d stick to it, not knowing how she would react when she saw him. But she felt better to have it. There were only bullet points and words on the page, they didn’t make much sense to Eddie. It was funny, it was a list of reminders of the most heinous things he’d done to her. And he couldn’t understand a word of it. He would understand far more than he bargained for very soon.
The next steps ensued, the warning call of the name. Her standing by the door waiting to be let in. Her hand trembled in Eddie’s and he squeezed it tight.
“I’m gonna throw up.” She whispered.
“No, you’re not. You’ve got this.”
“What if I can’t?”
“You can. I know you can. You can do anything.” He meant every word and she felt it.
“You had to put that bastard in there last time,” Robbie said from her other side. “This time he’s already in. You’re just helping keep him there.”
She nodded and took a deep breath. The door started to open.
The funniest thought she had walking into the room to sit at one of three tables in a rather anti-climatic conference room, was that orange looked terrible on him. She wasn’t in any spot to chuckle about it, but seeing him and not feeling fear or conditioned attraction made her feel a huge wave of relief. Part of her was worried she’d fall under his spell as soon as she saw him again. But she stood a little straighter feeling the old her slipping away.
Eddie was flabbergasted at the guy. He didn’t know what he’d expected, but it hadn’t been this. This guy was very possibly the best-looking guy he’d ever seen in real life. He had two realizations, one, he understood why a 16-year-old girl would fall for whatever he said, and two, he looked nothing like Eddie. They both had dark hair, that was it. This man had hair that hit about his ears, swooping back thick and shiny. His eyes were a soul-piercing blue and stood out like some lich king around his dark lashes and brown skin. He had a jaw that could cut glass and a strong nose that suited his intense appearance.
He didn’t look in the guys' direction much, it wouldn’t have mattered anyway, Bobby's eyes were only set on Star.
They all three sat down at a table as his name and charges were read.
“We have Florence Reynolds. The plaintiff in the case that sentenced him to prison.”
Eddie’s brow lowered, confused, and looking at Star who didn’t flinch. He turned to look at Robbie and he nodded. Eddie hadn’t know Star's real name.
There were formalities. Name stating and the relationship to the prisoner. She was asked to stand and did so without stumbling or projectile vomiting across the room. She considered that a win.
“As she said I’m Florence, I go by Star.”
“I always like Flo better.” Bobby smirked.
“Please refrain until she’s done speaking.” The woman who was calling out the formalities said and gave Star the nod to continue.
“I’m Star.” She stated again just for the reason of making him hear it again. “I was the victim of Bobby, as I knew him. He was found to have a narcissistic personality disorder and one we now both share, Post Traumatic Stress Disorder. I’ve been in extensive therapy since leaving the violent and manipulative relationship I had with him. My therapist has given me many diagnoses that affect my life every day because of the mental, emotional, sexual, spiritual, and physical abuse I endured while with him. I was only 15 when we met for the first time. A minor and a child. He was over a decade my senior and I believe that speaks to how he chooses his victims. If you let him out he will do it again. I know this because after I left him he did the same thing to one of my peers. He told them I was trying to get back with him and she believed him. That’s how I got the scar on my head, from a brick the girl and her friends hit me with. After a fire was set to the outdoor area of the school where I was knocked unconscious, I got these.” She held up her arm. “I have these and had to go through painful surgeries and physical therapy on top of mental therapy because of this inmate in front of you. I hesitate to call him a man because I don’t believe he’s human after the things he did to me and my family.” She put the paper down and took a deep breath, Eddie put his foot next to hers, she could feel it. She put her hand on the table, fingertips brushing the surface and she felt Eddie’s with its signature cold rings slide into hers. “He will tell you whatever you want to hear to get his way. That's what he does. He can act however the situation calls for. He'll lie and pretend and he’s so good at it that you won’t know it. Which is what I know is happening here. I went from a young teen who wanted nothing more than to be loved and dance with her friends on the weekends. I turned into a shadow of myself, alone and isolated and turning to drugs to make it through the day. He made me need them by tearing me down piece by piece for years and then supplied me with the drugs. He assured that I wouldn’t go anywhere. Control and isolation were his end goals. He framed me for stealing from my brother who knew of the trouble I was in and had warned me from the start about Bobby. But I didn’t listen because Bobby told me everything I ever wanted to hear and made me dependent on him for everything. Before I was able to escape I would be locked in our apartment with no key and no phone. He took my money and at one point my shoes so I couldn’t leave. As I said he made it look like I stole from my brother, both money and material possessions that belong to our mother. Robbie believed him and gave up on me. He thought I was a lost cause. This is what Bobby wanted. I was truly alone. He proceeded to keep me in the apartment after getting me fired from my job. I escaped by smashing a window and leaving via a fire escape. I made my way to Robbie where I told him the truth and seeing the state I was in and that I was sober he believed me. Without him, I wouldn’t have escaped. He had to physically defend me and himself to retrieve a few prized possessions I had left from my apartment, that’s when the original assault charge started. With that, I told everything to the cops, and trauma dumping as they asked me what happened, they took me to the station and asked if I wanted to press charges to which I said yes. I hope you believe me and the court's decision that he isn’t fit for public life. I hope you don’t make the same mistake I did and believe his lies. I hope you don’t force more women to be victims like I was by letting him free.” She nodded and sat, looking at the surface of the table in front of her and breathing through her nose. She’d done it.
“The board will take a recess to make a decision.” Was announced. Bobby was staring, unwavering at Star.
“You’ve looked better, Flo Jo.” The man smirked, spread legs, and sat back in his chair. Star met his eyes, glaring. “Was I so bad I turned you into a dyke? Who is this?” He laughed nodding at Eddie.
“It is a priviledge you get to stay out here while they deliberate. That can be taken away just as quickly.” The woman snapped as the officer standing off the side took a step forward.
“We’re just talkin',” he said with a smug face. Eddie and Star's hands were both shaking now. “This your boyfriend? That’s cute.” He looked them over. “Did she tell you what she told the courts that I did to her?” He asked sucking his teeth. “I didn’t do it of course.” He raised a brow. “But if you’d heard the things she told them you wouldn’t be able to hold her hand right now I’ll tell you that. She’s a dirty… filthy little girl aren’t ya Flo?” He winked.
“Robert! Last chance.” The woman says having the officer approach him.
“Nothing she doesn’t know. Don’t worry. I’m good.” He said with his hands up in cuffs.
With a united front of indifference, they didn’t give him the reaction he was hoping for. Nothing upsets a narcissist more than seeing they don’t have control over you anymore.
“Thank you ma’am it’s fine,” Star said as calmly as a glass lake. “He's trying to get a rise out of me.” She rolled her eyes and blinked lazily.
“You too good now?” He laughed. “You ran away from your home just like you do your problems and you think you’re too good for me now? That it?” He kept it lined with a huff of laughter to not seem angry and stay in the room to try to mess with her. “I hope you’ve your fun with Mr. Trianon over there because once he finds out what you’ve done he’s gone, baby girl.” He threw his head back and laughed. “I don’t know how she’s not the one locked up in here man. She's done some wiiiild stuff with me, my man. She’s a good time. Especially when you get a few drinks in her. I’ll give her that… but save ya some time and let me tell ya, that kitty cat ain’t worth it. If ya catch my drift.” He snickered and leaned into the table, despite being far away. They all three gave him a stone wall in response. They could see him get angrier, nostrils flaring. “You’re really gonna be with that pile of damaged goods?” He went for hurting them both again. “He must be as pathetic as you if he knows how messed up you are and he’s still with you.”
Star raised her hand to the woman who opened her mouth to stop him. “He’ll tire himself out eventually.” Another wave of reddened face from the handcuffed monster.
“You can’t talk to me like that alright? Just because I’m in here. You aren’t better than me now little Flo Jo. These?” He raised his hands in cuffs. “Don’t mean anything alright? They don’t make you right. They don’t make you okay now. Because I know you, Flo. I KNOW you.” He leaned in as far as he could and glared. “And you’re always gonna be that stupid little girl. The one with a sick mommy who can’t do anything right. You were born stupid that’s not your fault.” He lashed out. Star held a finger up as the woman caught on to what was happening. “Your mother was stupid for fuckin around with those queers and gettin' sick. She knew better, and so should you. But it never stopped ya. Your daddy was the only smart one because he got a jimmy free ride off ya mom and left!” He laughed again, deep and menacing, eyes growing slightly erratic.
“When you’ve said the same thing so many times it becomes boring.” Star responded, a perfectly timed yawn appearing afterward.
“There’s the mouth. There’s that smart mouth again, eh?” He nodded. “This guy isn’t hittin' you enough.” He growled. Star saw the door the deliberations were happening behind start to open and she smiled. “You’ve gotta keep this bitch in line. If not she’ll think she runs the place. She’s got a bad attitude and no respect, you need to remind her of what a little fuck up she is. How everything she’s touched has turned to shit. She’ll take your money, she’ll fuck your best friend then have the nerve to cry about it when you hit her for it. You gotta hold her down and-“
“I think we’ve heard enough to make our decision.” The man speaks as Bobby jumps and turns with wide eyes.
“You’re back just in time. She’s been out here trying to make me mad this whole time! It’s like I said before, check the papers, she’s a lying little snot. She’ll push you to the edge until you pop.” He rushed out to place the blame on anyone else.
“Ms. Reynolds thank you for your time we know this wasn’t easy. We appreciate your candid nature and you’ll be happy to hear we agree with you. The board will not be granted parole. The case will be revisited in 5 years' time.”
“FIVE YEARS? You fucking kidding me with shit?” He shouted as he was being stood up and moved away. “You did this to me Flo! Look what you turned me into! You’re taking a man’s life away here!”
Star stayed sat until he was gone, his voice fading behind a now closed door.
“Thank you.” She said with a nod and stood.
“I'm sorry for him speaking to you like miss. But I believe you knew how he’d respond and it seemed to work in your favor today. I'm glad.” The woman with a very sharp and cold suit said but he eyes were warm.
“Thank you, ma’am. The one good thing to come from all my therapy is I know what makes men like him tick now. It’s not hard to upset them.”
“Good luck. Enjoy the rest of your time in the city. ” She nodded and gathered her files. Onto the next one.
-
Not a word was spoken as they walked out of the prison. Eddie had so much information thrown at him so quickly he felt like the words were falling out of his ears.
The early afternoon sun hung high but not harshly over the drab grounds of the prison. Star stepped out feeling the familiar wind on her face and in her hair. It was at its longest she couldn’t ever recall it being, a grown-out choppiness with a few of her home-style cuts in the mix. Breaching the gate she walked calmly until she reached Robbie's truck where she slowed to a stop. The two men trailed behind her, letting her set the pace for the next move. Eddie moved beside her to observe but not disrupt. He couldn’t help but be compelled to treat her like she was fragile. She had every right to be. Plus, focusing on her needs let him ignore the avalanche of epiphanies and questions the last hour had brought down on him.
She closed her eyes and took in a chest-rising breath she felt into her toes. A single tear tan down her cheek to meet the corner of her mouth that curled into a smile. Her closed lips were tight before she turned them in to chew at them for a moment. Fluttering her eyes open she released her second audibly exhale. She turned, knowing she should address her support system. She didn’t meet their eyes, mouth opening to speak before she tilted her head, brows rising and falling as she tried to pick which words to come out of her mouth like a ball being plucked from a bingo cage. That’s how her brain felt anyway, rattled and spinning. She didn’t know how she felt, she knew it was good but, it didn’t feel real.
She decided to meet Eddie first, he knew she had on her thinking face. It always made his hands want to mush her cheeks with the way her lips pouted and her nose took on a bunny-like characterization. He mirrored her loss of words, both blinking as if they were trying to remember how to speak.
The silence stretched over a minute. After which Robbie decided to be the adult and guide them in a direction. Any direction.
“You two have a lot to talk about.” Both a factual statement and a jab at how they were looking at each other like fish out of water. He put a hand on both their backs, putting them both into the shade with his large silhouette. “I assume you’re gonna drive back with Eddie?” He asked with a gentle tone.
Star had been looking up at Robbie like she had when she was small and listening to his advice, eyes full of trust and awe. They quickly flicked to Eddie’s as he too looked away and to her.
“I’d like that.” He stuttered out, leaning forward a little nervously. “If you want to. That is.” He nodded and looked away leaning back again with his chin pressed into his neck. This decision came much faster and not to mention easier as she nodded before affirming with words to accompany it.
“Yeah. I’d like that.” She looked down with the same bashfulness and took his hand into hers.
“Are you gonna stay up here a while or get on back?”
“We’ve got school tomorrow we should just get back.”
“Eat first,” Robbie instructed.
“Oh right.” Star became aware of the painful empty feeling in her stomach. For once it was from a physical cause and not an emotional one. “That okay?” She asked Eddie.
“Whatever you want.” He nodded with high brows.
With that Robbie wrapped her up as she smiled into his shoulder.
“Proud of you kid. You should be too.” He kissed her cheek and she pouted, almost tearing up again. “Shush you know I love you don’t make me say it.” He grinned and shoved her shoulder to knock off her balance. With the order to drive safely and not be stupid, Eddie and Star found themselves side by side in his van again. It felt like months they’d been apart. Both scrambled to recall the last time they’d been in his van together.
“You need to talk about it?” He asked before turning on the van. Star shook her head and looked at him with a subtle smile.
“Not yet. I’m still processing it. It’s not hit me yet. Not really. It’s been a hell of a week, I don’t think my brain's caught up yet.” She huffed out a quiet laugh.
“It really has.” They both stared at nothing, eyes out toward the front of the van. “I’m sorry, you know. For… everything. For me and this today and just..” he sighed.
“It’s okay.” She put her hand on his arm. “We have all the time in the world to talk about it now don’t we?” She said with hopeful eyes. He put his hand to hers in his arm. He gave her a smile that showed his dimples and she softened even more. He took her hand into his and kissed it.
“Yeah, we do.” It was a tender moment they both needed. A moment of recognition and reprieve.
“But food first.” Star said seriously then she shifted into a light-hearted smile.
“Of yeah duh, obviously. Food first. Always.”
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PART 22
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If you enjoyed it, reblogs, likes and comments help IMMENSELY.
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Here's the playlist for the mixtape mentioned in the chapter if you're interested.
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#eddie munson#eddie munson x f!oc#eddie munson x f!reader#eddie munson fan fic#eddie munson fic#eddie munson fics#eddie munson fix it fic#eddie munson ff#eddie munson fan fiction#stranger things#eddie munson au#eddie munson fluff#eddie munson smut#eddie munson drabble#eddie munson imagine#eddie munson x reader#joe quinn#joseph quinn#stranger things au#stranger things s4#stranger things eddie munson#eddie munson stranger things#stranger thing fic#stranger things fan fic#stranger things fan fiction
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🌜The muse behind his creepiness🌛
pairing: eddie munson x reader
summary: after giving eddie some art advice, things unfold leading to you discovering an important secret. he’s a good artist, and he’s got a beautiful muse.
warnings: not necessarily a female reader, but eddie does refer to the reader as princess once.
word count: 2k ish
You stared at Mrs. Bailey, hoping she’d notice you staring. She was immersed in a magazine, flipping each page with the caution of a mother.
“Just stand up and do it,” Lisa suggested.
“No, I wanna ask her first, it’s her classroom, afterall,” you replied.
“There’s no way she’ll even care,” Deborah added.
With a sigh, your friends drew their gaze back to their paintings, leaving you staring at your art teacher.
After a few more seconds, she glanced up, making eye contact with you. With a quick hand movement, you asked if you could open up the windows. It was particularly hot in Hawkins, and the smell of the various products being used by your classmates to work on their projects was making you dizzy.
Once she gave you a nod of approval, you stood up and walked away from the table. You’d been sitting on the one closest to the back doors, which also happened to be the farthest from the windows.
Reaching your destination, you let the fresh summer breeze enter the room. You allowed yourself to take it in for a moment, closing your eyes to further on amplify your sense of smell.
Afterwards, you began walking back towards your seat, glancing over at what others were working on. Nothing particularly striked your interest, generic landscapes, boring portraits, artistic conformity.
You were about to stop with this and just look elsewhere when you caught a captivating mess from your peripherals.
There, plastered on a canvas, a distorted devilish creature with a grotesque expression stood out in a field of redness and purple splashes.
You followed the hands that were bringing the beast to life, landing on the one and only, Eddie Munson.
The reasons why you knew his name weren’t precisely good, but you had never been one to judge others, especially not based on groundless rumors.
He groaned, throwing and letting the brush he was using hit the table with violence.
“It doesn’t look right!” He muttered, more to himself than anything. You doubted he had noticed your presence yet.
“It-it needs more blue,” you spoke up, getting him to turn his head in your direction, “the, uhm, the purple I mean. It needs more blue.”
“Maybe you’re right.” He retrieved the brush, using it to add more blue to the purple he had mixed on his palette. The new color began to manifest, bringing a smile of satisfaction to his face.
He tested it on his painting, using more once proven that you’d been right.
“Hey, that actually made it better. Thanks for the advice.”
“Yeah, no problem. I like what you’re doing there. It’s the only piece I’ve seen so far that seems to convey any kind of emotion.” You covered your mouth the moment the words left your lips.
Eddie looked at you, entertained.
“Shit, that was so mean. I’m sorry. Not about the compliment, about bringing down other people’s work,” you cleared up.
“No, don’t apologize for speaking your mind. You’re right, most people take this class because Mrs. Bailey gives out free A’s.”
“It’s kind of frustrating, like, I’m really not trying to sound like an asshole here, but I uhm, I feel like I put way more effort into the assignments than some people,” you said, widening your eyes and subtly pointing with your head towards one of your classmates who’d drawn a blue sky with a couple clouds here and there.
“Well, at least we know we’re both assholes.”
You giggled, glad to have found an accomplice who didn’t judge you when you allowed yourself to not be perfect and say all the right things all the time.
“So, uhm, can I ask why you’re sitting alone? Or is that crossing a line?” You scratched the back of your neck, shrugging slightly.
“You can ask, princess. I just don’t think you’re gonna like the answer too much, it’s not that interesting.” He looked at you almost as if he was expecting you to walk away, but when you didn’t, and not only that, but moved closer, inviting him to continue, he opted to answer your question. “I just, none of my friends are in this class, and people don’t wanna sit with the freak, that’s all. No biggie, I’m a big boy, I can be alone for a couple hours.”
He said it in such a way that you almost believed him. If not for the fact that it sounded like a speech he had priorly rehearsed, an excuse that held a deeper meaning. Perhaps that’s what he thought about the situation, but that’s not how he felt.
“Well, can I sit here?”
“Oh, yeah, yeah sure,” he said, pulling a chair out for you.
“Give me a second, silly. I gotta go get my things.” You turned around, walking back to your old table, ignoring the intense looks your friends were giving you. Before even reaching them, they were already bombarding you with critics and interrogations.
“What the hell do you think you’re doing?” Lisa spat after noticing you had grabbed all of your things from the table.
“I’m gonna go sit with Eddie.”
“No you’re not, he’s a creep,” Lisa continued.
“You don’t even know him.”
“Sitting with him is social suicide, you can’t do that. It’s bad enough already that people saw you talking to him.” You cringed at Deb’s choice of words, not only were they immature and shallow, but they revealed a side of her that you’d ignored for too long.
“Well then, I guess you can start planning my funeral.” You rolled your eyes at them, turning around and getting as far away as possible from the people you used to consider your friends.
…
“You don’t have to stay here, I’m not gonna get mad or anything if you leave,” Eddie said, breaking the comfortable silence you’d fallen into.
“Why would you think I want to leave?” Ever since sitting down, you didn’t think you’d given him any signs for him to think you weren’t enjoying his company. You’d chatted for a while before going back to work in silence, but that didn’t mean you weren’t having a good time.
“Well, I’m gonna go with the fact that your friends have been shooting angry looks this way for the whole half hour you’ve been here.” His words prompted you to stare back, realizing that he was right. You frowned at them, keeping eye contact until they gave in and looked away.
“Sorry about that. They’re being idiots, and I don’t think I wanna keep being friends with them any longer.” You smiled at him.
“Why’s that?”
“They weren’t being very kind,” you practically whispered.
“Told you not to sit with me, am I right?” He gave you a smile that didn’t reach his eyes, hiding behind his hair as he continued on with his project.
“Uhm, yeah, sorry.” They were embarrassing you so much, you hated how they had made him feel. If they’d had the decency to even talk to him without caring about meaningless things such as a high-school reputation, they’d realize that he wasn’t only one of the funniest people you’d met, he was also incredibly kind and caring. You could only imagine what other things you would find out about him as time went on.
Silence again, this time it wasn’t a comfortable one, there was a hint of sadness in the air.
“So, what else did they say?”
You were taken aback, not understanding where he was coming from. Why did it matter? No one’s opinion mattered, not even yours.
“C’mon, I’m sure they called me a couple names. Nothing I haven’t heard before, just wanna know how far away from the truth they were.”
You were reluctant at first, not wanting to keep on talking about this any longer. Nothing good would come out of it, he’d only be more hurt. And that was the last thing you wanted to happen.
“Did they say I’m a freak? A weirdo? A waste of oxygen?”
It was hurting you to hear him talk about himself that way, the worst part is that he wasn’t even taking breaks to think between insults, and you knew he was listing them off from a list full of names he’d collected along the years.
“No, they just called you a creep, that’s all. And it doesn’t even matter because they’re jackasses with nuts for brains,” you replied, a little louder than necessary.
This answer seemed to surprise him for some reason. “Oh, well, they may be jackasses but at least they’re not liars, I’ll give them that.”
Putting down your brush, you stared at him. “What are you talking about? You’re not a creep.” At this point, you were beyond annoyed. Not necessarily at him, it was more of an annoyance towards the whole student body.
“Sure am!”
“Are not!” You spent a short moment bickering like toddlers, until Eddie got tired and turned to take something out of his bag instead.
“Here, if you don’t believe me then I’m gonna show you proof.”
He handed you a black leather journal. It looked far from new, covered in stickers with logos you mostly didn’t even recognize. Looking confused, he moved his hands towards you, a “go on” motion. Following through, you turned the first page over, being met with a few different concept ideas for something called “The Hellfire Club.” Intrigued, you continued to flip through, taking in every little detail from each of his unusual drawings.
Reaching the middle, you encountered the first drawing that didn’t fit in with the others. It was a realistic portrait of someone. The person was not facing in the viewer’s direction, less than half of their face could be seen. Upon closer inspection, you realized that the portrait was of you.
You turned towards Eddie, who wasn’t looking at you any more. Through hands covering his face, he said; “Keep going, it gets worse.”
After the first portrait, hundreds followed, all of you. Most of them had been drawn in this classroom, based on the point of view of the artist and which direction you were facing. But some you recognized had you in different settings. The cafeteria, the bleachers, other classes you must’ve shared with him.
Impressed, you set the journal down and used your hands to move his away from his face.
“Eddie? Look at me please.”
His face was slightly red and it was clear that he was struggling with eye contact, but he did as asked.
“This doesn’t make you a creep. A creep would’ve taken pictures of me changing, what you did is nothing like that. You just happened to draw what you were seeing. And honestly, you’re so good at it. I adored the first drawings just as much as I appreciated the portraits.”
He seemed to relax, or at the very least your words had him sitting straighter.
“Yeah, well, what can I say? Guess you’re my muse.”
“It is with honor that I accept such responsibility,” you said, doing your best British impression. You were trying to alleviate some of the tension that still hung from the air.
“Oh, then I must insist, thou must allow me to plaster your beauty on paper in the proper way,” he mimicked your accent, exaggerating it even more.
“Then I shall pose for thou, my dearest painter, any time and place thyn heart requires.”
“It’s settled then. It’s a date.” He winked at you. You felt how the heat spread throughout your body, having loved the fact that he used the word date for it.
Your friends could stare at you all they wanted, nothing was as important as the fact that you were Eddie Munson’s muse, and that you felt how he was slowly turning into yours.
#notice that small jonathan slander reference?#stranger things 4#stranger things#eddie munson#eddie stranger things#eddie#eddie fanfic#eddie munson fanfic#eddie fluff#eddie munson x reader#eddie munson x you
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Love Notes
Inspired by this post by @loveronlineee
It was such a sweet piece and it reminded me of Breezy and how I’ve always been jealous of her artistic abilities and anyone else who can draw/paint/sculpt/anything art related. Not that writing isn’t art! We paint beautiful pictures in readers’ minds with just words but something about drawing has always captivated me and eluded me. So please enjoy this fic from my very jealous point of view!
Pairing: Eddie x writer!reader
Warnings: jealousy and terrible poetry! I promise I’m a good poet I’m just rusty 😂😂
Why is he so pretty?
Why doesn’t he smile at me like that?
Maybe he would if you actually talked to him.
Yeah that’ll never happen.
Man, do I have to stop talking to myself.
You shook yourself from your thoughts and came back to reality. You tried your best to focus on your poorly drawn sketch in front of you but laughter from the back corner kept stealing your attention.
Eddie and Brianna sat in the back row, chatting and laughing away. You could see her drawing from your seat and you were blown away by her talent. She was an amazing artist and you were secretly envious of her talent. You struggled to draw a simple flower or stick figure, let alone a full portrait of someone.
Your partner was out for the day so you had nothing but time to sit and be jealous. You pulled out your notebook and favorite pen and began to write.
Writing was your choice of artistic medium. Maybe it wasn’t so much a choice as a calling, but you were able to paint colorful pictures with nothing but black and white words. Or at least that’s what your eighth grade English teacher had told you when she boasted to your parents about your latest story at your annual parent teacher meeting.
You began to scribble a few words here and there but before you knew it you were writing with a certain fluffy haired boy in mind.
Meet me at the corner
Of your dreams and mine
We’ll walk hand in hand
With nothing but time
I’ll tell you my worries
You’ll tell me your fears
Your skin will brush mine
Wiping my tears.
And that’s where we’ll part
At the end of the night,
Leaving our story
In darkened starlight
You looked back at Eddie who was studying his portrait with awe. You wished he’d look at you like that.
Maybe he could. Maybe not at you but maybe your writing.
You looked down at your poem and had a gutsy thought.
You excused yourself to the bathroom but made a beeline to the lockers instead. You knew Eddie’s locker, across and three down from your own. You slipped the folded up piece of paper into it before you could change your mind.
You raced back to class, having only a few minutes left before it got out. Eddie and Brianna were still chatting in the back but his eyes flickered to yours for a second when you walked in.
No more than a few minutes later did the bell ring and you bolted from the room again. You threw your books in your locker and waited for Eddie. He sauntered over to his not long after and as soon as he opened it up the paper fell out.
He looked around, confused, before picking it up. His eyes scanned the words and you swore you saw the corners of his lips twitch into a smile.
He folded the paper back up and put it in his jacket pocket, closed his locker and walked away with a big smile on his face. Seeing how happy he was made your heart swell knowing that you were the cause- even if he didn’t.
The next note was delivered a week later. A sweet little poem about luscious hair and passion-filled eyes. You couldn’t help but smile at the blush that crept onto his face when he read it.
Your little surprises continued on for the next few weeks and you decided to leave the notes in his locker after school, worried he might catch you one day out of class. You left them on days you knew he had his Hellfire Club meetings, hoping he’d check his locker at the end, taking home your sweet musings.
Eddie did happen to check after a meeting one night, the little note falling out. His heart began to race which was a common occurrence whenever he read the poems.
He thought they were incredibly sweet and couldn’t believe someone thought that way about it. Which is why, at first, he thought it was some sort of prank. After a few more notes, however, he figured no one would draw out a joke for so long.
He had tried waiting by his locker after school, but you always waited longer. You had a part time job in the library after school so you were there later than everyone else anyway.
Your poems were Eddie’s little escape from the normal bullshit of Hawkins High. One day during lunch, he and Jason got into a pretty bad fight, nasty insults being thrown both ways. You knew that Eddie only acted tough but enough torture would break anyone down eventually. Your poem was a little sad that day, but you hoped he would still appreciate it.
And appreciate it, he did. He read it over and over again before holding it tightly to his chest.
How could I not admire you?
From the confidence that drips like venom from your lips
to the fearless attitude that you convey.
I know the exterior has hardened from time- a carefree boy that’s been hidden away.
And your boisterous voice is not chance, but a choice
To show people around you that you’re not afraid
Just know that we’re all trying to figure it out-
How to get out of this sad world unscathed.
You are not alone.
He almost started to tear up when he read it, feeling vulnerable that someone could see through his tough exterior.
The next day in English, everyone had to read their short story in front of the class. Public speaking was never your strong suit but you tried your best to just focus on the story in front of you. Your hands were shaking and it was hard to take a deep breath. You looked up and saw that no one was really paying attention which helped ease your nerves. Even Eddie, in the back row of course, was doodling in his notebook.
You began your story about a young woman, a fallen Angel, hellbent on revenge. She was a badass, confident warrior- very much your opposite.
A few people began to really listen, enthralled by your words. Eddie was half listening, too busy with his new hellfire logo design.
“-and the words dripped from her lips like venom, poisoning the hearts of those around her-“
Eddie’s head shot up. Did you just say almost the exact same thing that was in the poem? Maybe it was a coincidence? Probably not, who else would write something like that?
He listened closer to your words, noticing a certain similarity to the rhythm and style in which you wrote. His heart began to beat faster and his palms got sweaty.
You finished your story and nervously looked up at the room, fidgeting in front of everyone’s stare. They began lightly clapping at the instruction of your teacher. Eddie clapped the loudest which made you look back at him. His eyes didn’t break from your gaze which made your stomach do a flip.
Eddie continued to stare at the back of your head for the rest of the class. Afterward, he rushed to lunch so he could talk to his friends.
“Guys, I think I figured out who’s been leaving me notes,” he said as soon as he sat down. Everyone stared at him, waiting for him to continue. He tried to nonchalantly look over at you and motioned with a slight nod of his head. Everyone turned at once, making him roll his eyes.
“(y/n)? The crazy amazing writer that’s won like every writing contest there ever was? She’s leaving you love notes?” Mike asked.
“You know her?” Eddie asked, almost sounding desperate.
“Uh, kinda? She helps Nancy out with the paper every once in a while. She even had dinner at our house once,” he remembered.
“She’s super nice,” Gareth added.
“How do you know her?” Eddie questioned.
“She was my partner on a history project once. She did most of the work thankfully. That’s probably the only time I got an A in history,” he chuckled.
“Am I the only person who doesn’t know her?” Eddie sighed.
“And yet, you’re the only one she’s leaving love notes for,” Dustin purred.
“Well we don’t know that. She could be leaving them for twenty different guys- you know- casting a wide net,” Lucas said. Everyone glared at him.
“Thanks, buddy, that really helps,” Eddie mumbled.
Eddie looked over at you and admired you. How had he not noticed you before? Especially since you seemed to have noticed him quite a bit. He wanted to get to know you, but first, he had to make sure it was actually you leaving the poems.
“Would you guys be okay with switching the meeting to Thursday night instead of Tuesday next week?” He asked.
“I guess?”
“Why?”
“What are you gonna do?”
“Please tell me you’re not gonna stalk that poor girl,” Dustin sighed. Eddie smirked at his friends and clapped his hands together.
“Guys, I’m gonna get me a girlfriend. That’s what I’m gonna do.”
“Yeah, okay.”
“If you say so.”
Everyone went back to their lunch and talking about their next campaign. Eddie could hardly focus; he was too excited for the upcoming week.
You finished cleaning up the library and, like every other Tuesday night, you went to put a poem in Eddie’s locker. You slipped it in easily enough and headed down the hall toward the parking lot. You rounded the corner and crashed into a somebody. Your scream of surprise quickly turned into an awkward spilling of apologies.
You finally looked to see who it was, your heart nearly stopping when you saw Eddie’s smirking face looking back at you. He was still leaning against the wall, arms crossed, looking as calm as ever.
“Hey, (y/n),” he said with a smile.
“H-hi, Eddie,” you squeaked. You tried to move around him but he stepped in front of you.
“You’re here late.”
“Um, yeah, I work in the library after school,” you said. “I should be getting home.”
You hadn’t planned on running into Eddie and you very much wanted the interaction to end. You weren’t prepared for this to happen and you didn’t know what to say. He would probably figure out that you were the ones leaving notes if he went to go check his locker. He would be smart enough to put the pieces together.
“What’s the rush, sweetheart? We never get the chance to talk.”
“We do get the chance, we just never do,” you shrugged.
“And why is that? Because words would drip like venom from your lips?” He asked. Eddie chewed on his nails nervously, hoping you’d catch on.
“M-my story? You liked it?” You hoped that’s all he was talking about.
“Your story was amazing, don’t get me wrong, but I’m more of a poetry guy myself,” he spoke, slowly taking a step toward you.
“I-is that so?”
“Yeah! In fact, I’ve recently found my new favorite.” He took another step toward you and was pleased when you didn’t move away. “Were you ever gonna tell me it was you?”
You contemplated lying, but it seems that he already figured it out. You cursed yourself for using the exact same line from the story in your poem.
“Probably not,” you said honestly. He frowned a little bit.
“Why not? Do you not want to talk to me? Because I can go and we can forget this ever happened.” Maybe he misjudged the situation. Maybe it was a joke or maybe you left secret notes so no one would know you liked the freak. You could see the doubt creeping onto his face and it broke your heart.
“No, I do want to talk to you! I just…I don’t really know how. And I figured you didn’t want to talk to me so…I just wrote instead,” you mumbled.
“Why wouldn’t I want to talk to you? You seem pretty damn amazing,” he laughed softly.
“I’m not amazing. I’m not a crazy talented artist or some hot cheerleader. I’m just me.”
“Uh, yeah, that’s kinda what I like about you. You’re not a fake asshole like almost everyone else here. You just keep to yourself and do your own thing,” he said.
He grabbed your hand and tugged to get you to look at him. Your eyes had fallen to your shoes, hating when you’d let your insecurities show.
“Can I take you on a date?” He asked. Your eyes widened in surprise.
“I’d really like that Eddie,” you finally smiled. A wide grin broke out on his face.
“On one condition though.” You smile faltered and you raised your eyebrow. “You have to keep writing me poems.”
“I think I can do that,” you laughed. Eddie leaned down and placed a soft kiss on your cheek. He intertwined his fingers with yours and led you from the school, walking you to your car with the promise of picking you up for your date on Friday night.
Maybe being a writer isn’t so bad after all.
———————————
Taglist: @mellomadness @thebookbakery @dootys @munsaniac @tiredwritersworld @mrsdarcyinlovewithbuckybarnes @rafecameronswhore
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short fic starring jason and his little mouse from built to love, but broken now
find more ficlets of this couple here
College Days
College.
You’ve never really given it much thought. You’d been editing videos since high school, have made a decent income from it, and never really thought of pursuing anything else. It also helps that although your parents never really cared for you, at least not in the ways that you needed, they had left you enough money to be able to manage on your own for a few years, even with the hefty hospital bills.
So, further education has never been on your mind, didn’t seem like a priority with how your life has been going so far.
But Jason, surprisingly, wanted to go, brought it up over dinner one night before he went out for patrol.
“What do you think about English Lit, mouse?” He had asked as he pushed his food around with his fork.
“Like, as a subject?”
“Well, yeah, like, what do you think if I take it up when the new term starts at Gotham U?”
“I, really, Jason? You want to go?”
“I always liked reading, books, discussing them with Alfred. So, I figured, why not?”
“But do you need to go to college for that? You can, like, sign up for a book club at the library or something.”
There’s a light blush on Jason’s cheeks and he tries to hide it with his hand, tries to play it off. He’s embarrassed. “It’s not just books. I liked school.”
“Well, then sure. I think English Lit is a good course for you to take up.”
“Why don’t you go with me?”
“I, I can’t afford the tuition, Jason.” Now you were playing around with your food, finding it easier to look at than Jason. You could see that he was excited, that this is something he wanted for the both of you.
“So, apply for a scholarship. Hell, we have money. It’s no big deal.”
“No, you have money.”
“Mouse. If you want to go, I’ll make sure it happens.”
So, college. It’s an interesting idea. You think that more than teaching you things that you can learn on the internet anyway, it’s the experience that you want to have. High school was rough, but you think that being on the same campus as Jason might be interesting. You’d at least have a friend to have lunch with.
It’s just, do you really want to take up math again? It seems like it’s an unavoidable subject, that all courses have to at least have the basic units. Algebra and Statistics. And you think, is going back to school really worth it?
“I can help you. You’re not going in this alone.” Jason laughs in that airy chuckle like way of his, more like an amused puff of air, when he sees you sort through different course pamphlets. Rather than ranking them by genuine interest, you were tossing out the courses that required more than two math units, the minimum.
“You’ll have other things to worry about, Jason. You’ll have your own classes, patrol, you can’t just drop everything and tutor me.”
“This is supposed to be fun, mouse.”
“I just don’t want to fail.”
“You’re not going to,” Jason says confidently. He’s been getting more and more comfortable with the idea of going back to school by the day. He’s looked up past syllabuses online, looked into forums where students discussed the best teachers for each subject. “But even if you do, it’s alright. We’re there to learn. It’s not like you’re gunning for a desk job after, right? You’re settled here. Just choose something that’s interesting.”
“I did always want to try art.”
“There you go! And look, only two units of math!”
“Ugh. You better make time for me in your schedule. I’m going to need all the help I can get.”
“I’ll always have time for you.”
...
a/n: inspired by the fact that jason loves books and i genuinely think (and i’m pretty sure i’ve seen discussions about it somewhere with actual proof) that jason’s a nerd and did enjoy school
also i’m just projecting my own frustrations with going back to school and math here. i’ve graduated years ago but still stick to the fact that if i didn’t have to take math ever again, i’d go back.
#ficlet#oneshot#jason todd one shot#jason todd imagine#jason todd x reader#jason todd x you#arkhamverse#arkham knight#arkham knight jason todd#short fic
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