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#thinking about Neil will kill that man one day I stg
void-and-virtue · 2 years
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Neil as a team captain is positively delightful, because making him captain is both absolutely insane and absolutely brilliant. It capitalizes on the passive effect of having one (1) Neil Josten (god knows the world couldn’t handle if there were more of him) on the team in the most efficient way. Like. I’m 90% sure that after spending some time around him on the same team, most people will look up to him completely awestruck for how much he has impacted their lives, but that’s just not what is actually happening here. I feel like what’s going on is this:
Neil is a terribly amazing choice for team captain entirely because Neil is a meddlesome little asshole who will forcibly fix all of his teammates’ personal problems and improve their entire lives for literally no other reason than that he needs them to be able to focus on fucking ball so he can win at sports. It’s not even that he genuinely cares about people and their well-being (apart from his original foxes). He just gets pissed when things aren’t working properly because it makes Exy annoying when the lineup can’t communicate. Exy isn’t supposed to be annoying. Exy is life. He’d meddle whether he is captain or not, but by making him captain, he has so much more official executive power at his hands. It’s like people are explicitly asking for him to do his worst. So, fueled by his own competitiveness and love for the sport, off he goes.
Neil is just as bad as Kevin when it comes to his Exy obsession. The major difference between them is that Kevin is endlessly tactical and he runs Exy with a focus on a technical and physical level entirely, whereas Neil’s approach is to look beyond a lack of practice and basically psychoanalyzing people on why they are not doing 110% for Exy. Kevin says “let’s run this drill 500 times, then we will inevitably be better”. Meanwhile Neil is scheming how to coerce and bribe people into life-changing decisions and long-needed healing, entirely because he wants to optimize playing a sport. Exy is a team sport, which is why this is the most logical approach his little Exy brain comes up with rather than minding his own fucking business. He looks at the team and is like “is anyone gonna whip this into shape? No?? I’ll fucking do it then cowards” and goes and does exactly that. It’s like he’s fixing the equipment so he can play.
I don’t think anyone except for Andrew is really aware that Neil really isn’t doing this out of the innate goodness of his heart, but because his personal brand of practicality involves the most convoluted and creative kind of scheming. I feel like Neil is a lot more selfish than people give him credit for. Sure, there’s people he cares deeply and unconditionally for, but that’s really not everyone. It’s fascinating to watch, especially because it’s not like he ever hides that he doesn’t particularly care, but people kinda assume he does, because why else would he put in this much effort?
Exy. The answer is Exy.
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danwylds · 4 years
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Right okay I never actually got myself to write this fic so have my notes for the fic except I haven’t read through them since June when I wrote them and I refuse to edit anything
Right is bakery au but not
Neil either turned down the offer of exy for the foxes or for coach whatever the fuck his name was
He got caught earlier tho which is . Unfortunate
Stuart still comes in
Maybe I’ll have him move back to Britain for a while? To avoid the moriyamas n stuff
He NEVER misses a match of the ravens/foxes tho
Which leads to him seeing the frankly sickening interview of Kevin and riko
Neil is like yo Stuart let me start smth
Stuart is like Neil the only reason you’d go back to the states right now is if you did smth that you could hide and you can’t do that for shit
So Neil is like yk what I’m gonna find a way bc I’m not letting this kid go through this (Andrews quite into this idea when it’s shared)
So he says yo. Stuart. Uncle. Sir. Let me open a bakery or something in the states
Stuart is like no you fucking idiot
And Neil is like but c o n s i d e r
You can get info or smth
Just have another business in the states yk
AND I’d get out of your hair
And Stuart is like hm okay but you’ve gotta live in a complex I choose for you
And Neil is all only if I can choose where it’s gonna be
It’s a deal
He (very obviously) chooses a place near palmetto
Stuart is tired but is like he’ll be under protection n shit so I guess??? And he’s not stupid enough to start something right. Right.
Wrong.
Anyways.
It’s a bakery that starts out kinda slow
But Neil finds he likes baking and Stuart pays for his nephew to have some sort of normal life so it doesn’t matter too much
Renee starts to frequent it
At first it’s to pick up sweets for Andrew
But eventually she starts bringing Allison on dates there bc they have a cute little seating area (figure where Seth fits in? I think he’ll survive?)
Uhhh what’s a timeline
I think this’ll be around the winter holidays (Jewish neil? Look into it)
So thanksgiving will have happened . I think Andrew agreed to go Not bc he particularly wanted to but bc he cares for Nicky and knows he’ll probably go anyways
Yeah so thanksgiving. h
Andrew JUST got off his drugs and he’s so damn protective of his own that he hardly even leaves their sides
Edens is a def no for em
Meanwhile Neil is tentative friends w Renee who has brought all the upperclassmen there a few times
Allison bullies him for his clothing but it’s okay he deserves it
Renee is sweet and stops em from doing anything too drastic which Neil appreciates
Matt,, my baby,, he’s so happy he just asks Neil about random stuff
Dan is sweet too!!
Seth kinda hates him but Neil hasn’t paid enough attention to return the favor
One day close to the winter banquet the upperclassmen are like yeah Neil we’re gonna go to this thing and it should be really fun!! Oh you know what? Our teammate Nicky needs a date and his cousin doesn’t really like anyone from his class and he’s super fucking crazy abt it so if that doesn’t deter you then you should totally join !
Neil is like oh chance to fuck up Riko? Absolutely I’ll go
ALLISON DRESSES HIM
HE LOOKS SO GOOD
when he and Allison emerge from the girls room Aaron is like Who is that
And Allison is “oh nickys date (:”
Andrew gets twitchy and holds a knife to her throat
Renee is like Andrew I stg get away from my gf and Seth is like manic pixie nightmare fuel I’m gonna beat the shit outta you
And Neil is just like same shit every day I guess
And he’s like so you’re Nicky then? COMPLETELY IGNORING YK. ALL THAT
Andrew is like “he is. Don’t touch him”
And Neil straight up says I don’t think you get to set boundaries for people, actually
And Neil has no idea what the effect is of that on Andrew but it’s enough to make him glare
Which is terrifying to everyone but Neil bc again. Dumbass
Anyways Neil very purposely hooks his arm through nickys and they head off to the bus
Dunno what happens there but I’ll figure it out
RIKOOO ROASTTT **AIRHORNNNNSSS**
It’s glorious
Kevin and riko are like who the FUCK are you
And Neil is all wouldn’t you like to know weather boy
They relocate and they’re all like . Ah. That’s why you and Renee get along
It’s kinda funny ngl
Andrew doesn’t think so but fuck him
I think that they head back to the bus when this shit I’d over and wymack is like excuse me what the fuck
And Aaron in german is like thank god he never joined the team bc I could not handle more of that
And Neil in German is like would you believe me I’d I told you I was almost signed
And Andrew is like I fucking Knew it I hate it here
N e ways things go back to normal for the most part
The upperclassmen still show up
Seth has a bit of grudging respect for him
It’s later that all the foxes are getting drunk from a lose that Renee calls him and is like Neil please can I usher them inside for a bit I think they need a place to chill so we don’t get yelled at for being too loud in the dorms
And Neil is like uhh sure why not
It turns out it was not just the upperclassmen
He gives them all water bottles and whatever and lets them lounge around
Gives em some food which they pay for w the coachs card
Uhhh idk time passes and some of the foxes pass out so neil is like y’all can chill in the break room? They have couches
He stays out there bc the bakery is still open
Andrew comes out like hey fuck you but also can I get more of those pastries
Idk I want them to be in love already
Uhh yeah I think they don’t say anything until
“what happened to your face”
“A truth for a truth?”
“If you must insist”
“Fine, my father tried to kill me”
Andrew raises his eyebrow but neils like bitch you said a truth for a truth it’s your turn now
Neil asks him why he wears arm bands
We get the whole knives and scars
They’re quiet again
I don’t know man let them be in love
Uhhh okay
I think Andrew will tell neil like
“[code]”
“Huh”
“That’s the code for the court, Kevin practices at night.”
Neil is like how would you know I’d enjoy playing exy? And andrew is like dipshit that’s how we met
I’m running out of ideas oh no
Maybe they play a couple of night game things
Exchange a few more truths
OHHH OKAY COOL SO THEN NEIL CAN GO TO EDENS W THEM THE WHOLE “DOESNT MEAN I WOULDNT BLOW YOU” THING CAN STILL HAPPEN
sick okay! They start dating but since Baltimore happened earlier they never actually come out to the rest of the team
I like to think when they play against the ravens again neils like haha babe you can have as many sweets as you want if you shut down the goal
Also Neil says it’s hot which is like a big thing to persuade Andrew but shhhhh
Yeah the foxes win they celebrate by getting drunk and they all show up at neils like hello again (:
Same thing happens but this time andrew and Neil are together and basically are doing nothing but making out
At least the store is closed
Nicky comes out and just YELLS
YALLLLLL COME LOOK @ THIS SHIT
Allison wins SO much money
Yeah idk how to end this but happily ever after :3
If you want me to turn this into a fic I will!
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