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pixiedoodlein · 3 years

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I’m so fucking mad that a year and a half into this pandemic I am back to 11th hour debating another year of homeschool. The first stretch of homeschool, in NYC, when the toddler was a baby, and husband was home on unemployment, was good, nice even, a quiet piece of something good when the world outside was falling apart. The next stretch, the Oklahoma stretch, with a particularly climby toddler, husband working 10 hour days, me doing remote contract work, somewhere we had no family around to help w/ childcare, was challenging. I was not always my best self. Some days were delightful, muffins and math games. Other days I was more Miss Trunchbull than Miss Honey, fractions were squeezed in between crying (usually mine) and netflix (way too much of hers), and I held on to any shred of sanity by telling myself “just a little longer, just until the vaccines.”

Well here we are. Husband & I have been vaccinated for months, but the kids aren’t yet. The upstate NY town we moved to is a very small town (pop: 838), was mostly untouched by previous waves. When we got here, I couldn’t understand why everyone was so lax about it- no masks, no panic. Our first day here, when I came home from the market and saw through the window a gaggle of unmasked kids in my living room (the neighbors coming to welcome us, they heard a kid moved in) I almost had a heart attack. In fact, I was so tired from the drive from OKC that for a moment I actually thought I was at the wrong house, that I was hallucinating, because how in the world could there be unmasked bodies in my living room.

Then I started talking to people here. And I realized that the way I thought they were insane for not being deathly afraid of covid, they thought I was insane for being petrified. Because the disease hadn’t hit here; their businesses were destroyed and their kids were out of school (in a rural area with barely functional internet, remote school = a lost year) and their lives were totally fucked up, for a disease that never arrived at their doorstep. I came to understand why they weren’t worried, why here life looked (almost) normal. I told them about what it was like to live somewhere covid tore through, the freezer trucks of bodies on the FDR Drive and my previously healthy 27yld brother so sick with it the first spring he thought he was about to die (but too scared to go to a hospital), my dad’s relative in the next NYC wave on a vent for months and lucky to be alive but may never walk again, the doctors in OKC pleading on the news to please wear a fucking mask because the hospitals were fucking full, and the neighbors stopped thinking I was psycho when I carried extra masks for their kids, and made them put them on, when I took them to town for ice cream. I never stopped masking. But we did indoor dine here (once, BBQ, it wasn’t delicious enough for how anxious I felt) and I did bring all the kids, including my toddler, to a fairly crowded children’s museum in the big (small) city an hour away, where the rest of us were masked but the one with his hands in his mouth, who was all up in other kids’ faces, the one who really should be masked, wasn’t because he won’t leave it on for more than a minute.

Actually it’s a lie to say that I never stopped masking- I have dashed into little stores here, without one, because I’m vaxed! It’s safe here! Covid felt done. We had friends come here to visit this summer. Friends who are vaxed, but that doesn’t seem to really matter enough anymore. We had the neighbors over for meals, indoors (you see, more indoor dining! A minute ago I was just thinking restaurants, but why would plagues only spread in restaurants?). They had us for meals. The girls are a crew, new best friends, making my daughter’s life here so, so much happier, constant sleepovers (their kids were at our house this afternoon; my kid is at their house right now). The parents and grandparents are wonderful, making my life here, and husband’s life here, so much easier, so much better. We help them with stuff, they help us with stuff, there isn’t a day that goes by that we don’t see each other, unmasked. Some of the adults in their household are vaxed; some of the adults in their household are not. The kids are all too young to be vaxed. But it (living, doing shit again, seeing people again) really stopped feeling scary; it really felt like everything was fine, normal-ish, normal-er. The end of the pandemic felt in sight.

I signed my child up for school here. Real school, not mommy school, school with a school bus. She was a little anxious, I had to talk her into it, I sold it hard, I bought her whatever pair of new sneakers she wanted for her new school (she hasn’t had gym class in a year and a half; for a phase in Oklahoma she wore one boot and one sandal every day, why not). She wasn’t anxious about sneakers or covid; she was anxious that maybe she hadn’t learned enough in homeschool (I am not a teacher! I did not homeschool because I am good at it or love it or wanted to, I homeschooled because I was scared of her getting covid at school and dying), that she would be behind. She isn’t behind. I followed the real school curriculum as best I could (as in: sometimes totally and sometimes not at all), and somehow, when I gave her the standardized “real school” test “at the end of the year” (aka the day I couldn’t take it anymore, I had to focus on my work or I wasn’t going to have an income, the day I’d decided we’d done as much as we could and it was time to be done), she sailed through it, this kid is smart. Smart as in needs to be in actual real fucking school to stay smart and learn and reach her potential.

She got excited- one of the neighbor kids is in her grade. The other kid is older- but the school is small, she’d see her tons. She was excited; I was excited. I registered her for school. Her new teacher sent a nice note. We all were excited. She’s never taken the school bus before but the neighbors take it and she’d be fine on the bus with her besties, the bus would pick her up in front of their house since there’s nowhere to turn around up our hill (we are VERY rural), they’d all get on and off the bus together. She has been backpack shopping. We have been discussing what she’ll have for breakfast (honey nut Cheerios), what she wants me to pack for lunch (she says just Goldfish, I say turkey sandwich, we’re working on it).

But now, 18 days before school starts here, I am thisclose to pulling her out, to embarking on another lovely (not), gratifying (not) year of homeschool, because of covid, delta. When we got to our new home in our new tiny town in June, there was no covid here. Now, our county is listed by the CDC as a high transmission area (is there anywhere in the US that isn’t?). 80% of senior citizens here are vaxed; 50% of the total population is, well below the national average. 15 cases per 100,000, in a county of 100,000. I guess this is less rampant than our previous pandemic locales, NYC (currently 25/100K), OKC (49/100K). This is splitting hairs, everywhere is bad. This is what panic does to me: are we better or worse for every decision we’ve made in the past year and a half, every decision that got us here? There are fewer cases here but fewer people and fewer vaccinated people and fewer ICU beds. We aren’t safe even here, but at least we are happy (happy aside from fear of delta death).

I don’t know whether to send my kid to school in 18 days. There will be masks but masks aren’t enough (how many masks do I make her wear? two, ten, a thousand?). This choice feels crazy— in March 2020, when that covid was mostly sparing kids, I yanked her out of school. Now, this covid does hurt kids. How much longer, how many more years, can parents be in this position to make this nightmare choice? What will hurt her more: school or no school? There are vaccines, more than enough in America. We shouldn’t be having to make this choice.

As it is, because of toddler— not because of toddler, because of being a parent to children in a pandemic— my work life, and husband’s, will be severely impacted this year, again. I can’t send him to daycare because he’s too little to leave a mask on (he won’t even leave his pants on!) in a room full of other unmasked toddlers, whose families may or may not be vaxd, may or may not wear masks (there has been a noticeable increase in supermarket mask wearing since we got here, but still not enough, is any of it enough?), may or may not be going to parties and weddings and funerals, daycare providers who may or may not be doing all the same. This means I can only apply to remote jobs, so I can be home with him. Husband has some flexibility, more than he did in OKC, but god forbid he has to work while I have a work call or meeting or work due I didn’t manage to get done at 4am or 11pm when the house is quiet. He can’t bring toddler to work with him, his work is up on scaffold, stenciling ceilings. This will be another year of me muting myself on Zooms while toddler pulls his diaper off and hurls poop at the cat. Would it really be so much harder to also be trying to teach parts of speech to our daughter at the same time? Yes, it would, but I don’t know if I can send my kids back out into the world until they’re vaccinated. I am counting the days, holding my breath, until they can be.

I used to believe in personal choice. I don’t anymore. I want this shit to be mandated, I want the government to line us up and force mRNA into holdouts’ arms, I want it to be required, to be able to function in and interact with and benefit from society in any way, shape, or form. I have been very lucky in the pandemic. Privilege stacked on privilege on privilege, to be fussing over my Zooms in my hamlet. I had been pretty pandemic perky, baking my pies and playing with my pandemic pets and (thinking about) doing puzzles, but I’ve reached my breaking point. This shit could be done, but it’s not, and I’m scared it never will be.

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thewales · 4 years

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The Duchess of Cambridge shared in The sunday times a few pictures and the stories behind them, that were submitted to her project #holdstill, besides that the duchess explained what motivated her to launch the project and what is the objective of it.

Catherine, Duchess of Cambridge

Sunday August 30 2020, 12.01am BST, The Sunday Times

Throughout recent history, photographs have recorded people’s lives and experiences — telling not just an individual’s story, but also documenting significant moments for families, communities, nations and the world as a whole.

The coronavirus pandemic has affected all of us in some way, and I launched Hold Still with the National Portrait Gallery to give everyone an opportunity to share their own stories, so that together we could create a collective portrait of our nation that would record our experiences during lockdown.

I have been overwhelmed by the public response to the project. With more than 31,000 entries, my fellow judges and I had a huge challenge on our hands selecting just 100 final portraits. Every submission told a unique story — from moments of joy, love and community spirit to deep sadness, pain, isolation and loss. It’s during times such as these we realise more than ever the significance of human connection.

I hope that the final 100 images will serve to showcase the experiences and emotions borne during the pandemic here in the UK, pay tribute to the awe-inspiring efforts of all those who have worked to protect those around them, and provide a space for us to pause and reflect upon these truly extraordinary times.

Opening image

We’re really lucky to have a garden — Robert Coyle

“The weekend is here, lockdown continues and Bernadette and Francis enjoy the garden. One Friday, as I finished emailing at the kitchen table, my wife had taken a chair and a drink outside to enjoy the evening sun. We were doing our best, like the rest of the country, with work, childcare and news of daily death tolls. Our son had taken to relieving himself on the plants, much to our initial amusement and then slight frustration.”

JOHANNAH CHURCHILL

Melanie, March 2020 — Johannah Churchill

“I took this photograph of my colleague Melanie wearing PPE in clinic. We are both nurses working in southwest London. Melanie had been readying essential infection control procedures for the opening of the Covid clinic that week.”

JESSICA SOMMERVILLE

“Keep smiling through. Just like you always do. ’Til the blue skies drive the dark clouds far away” — Jessica Sommerville

“This is my darling Nan, my ray of shining light. She raised me to be strong and kind. I took this portrait when I wasn’t allowed in the house. Her smile was still as bright even though I hadn’t been able to cuddle her for months.”

ALI HARRIS AND LEIGH HARRIS

The first kiss — Ali Harris and Leigh Harris

“This is the moment that our third baby boy came into the world, in the middle of a pandemic, surrounded by medical staff in full PPE, and the first thing he did was try to give his mummy a kiss through the protective screening and Mummy’s mask. This beautiful moment was captured by Daddy, Leigh, and it was love at first sight for all of us and we have been besotted ever since. Despite everything going on in the world, children and babies in particular have a way of keeping us grounded and focused (most of the time!), and we are so proud to have brought a new life into the world during the height of this pandemic.”

THE REV TIM HAYWARD

Prayers for our community — The Rev Tim Hayward

“When it was announced that church buildings were to be closed to the public to reduce the transmission of the virus, I wanted to assure our community that although we couldn’t gather physically, their photos in church were a symbol that they and their loved ones were still very much in our thoughts and prayers.”

JULIE THIBERG

Empty — Julie Thiberg

“This was just before lockdown happened, when I took my son shopping. I happily got a big trolley and was surprised at how easy it was to get a parking space, only to find the Sainsbury’s superstore completely empty — only a few oils, spices and clothes and toys were left. My son Leo had just turned three years old and didn’t understand what was happening at the time. Although he did pick up that our shopping trip was very different on this day. As a parent, I probably experienced silent panic and a fear that this type of shopping would be the new normal. I decided to take the picture to remember a unique day that would be the start of a long and challenging time. We had been to pay for our wedding ceremony, although we were realising it was unlikely to happen, so walking into an empty shop made us only more worried. I look forward to telling Leo all about this time when he’s a lot older.”

RONI LIYANAGE

Where’s Grandpa? — Roni Liyanage

“The moment when my daughter, Gaby, could embrace her grandmother, Teri, for the first time, together with her mother, Vanessa, a month after her grandfather Kevin FitzGerald died from idiopathic pulmonary fibrosis at the Royal Brompton Hospital on April 19, 2020. ‘Where’s Grandpa?’ they whispered as they cried. Then Gaby, without hesitation, smiled and pointed to the trees outside the window where he had spent his last weeks, comforted by the view of St Mary Abbots Church, where he had been baptised 66 years earlier. In this time of social distancing and lockdown, it is a hug between three generations collectively mourning the loss of a grandfather, father and husband.”

CERI A EDWARDS

Be safe, Daddy x — Ceri A Edwards

“This picture was originally a piece of work set for our daughter during lockdown. Poppy struggled with her dad having to go to work as a paramedic throughout the Covid-19 pandemic, and she worried about him each time he left to go to work. Poppy loves a cuddle and this happened to be a special moment between them just before my husband left to go on a night shift.”

HELEN PUGH

Rainbow — Helen Pugh

“Ten days into shielding, my daughter and I joined the movement to paint rainbows on the windows. It was a moment of hope, fringed by fear and uncertainty. We were holding our breath to see what would happen. My daughter was shielding due to a rare genetic condition, and I’m her sole parent so lockdown was very quiet for us. In early March my income as a photographer was lost as jobs were cancelled and inquiries stopped coming in. We fell through the gaps for financial help from the government. I carried on taking pictures of my daughter, trying to process what was happening. This image is one of hope, but looking back on it I can feel strongly the sense of worry and uncertainty of that time; knowing that due to shielding I would be unable to work for months and the worries over my daughter’s health. Lockdown was hard for our family, but the rainbow in the window stayed for months and kept reminding me to keep going.”

HASSAN AKKAD

Gimba — the ward host — Hassan Akkad

“During the peak of the pandemic I signed up to work as a cleaner in a Covid-19 ward at my local hospital, Whipps Cross. Within days, Gimba, our ward host, called me ‘my son’; I noticed she loved eating rice. Gimba migrated from Nigeria to Britain and has been working at the hospital for more than a decade, commuting for two hours to get to work. On the day the photograph was taken Gimba had received the terrible news from Nigeria that her mother had fallen ill and had been rushed to hospital. Gimba cried all day and was heartbroken that she couldn’t fly home to see her mother and look after her because of travel restrictions during the pandemic. She declined to take any time off, saying, ‘I have to feed my patients.’ I took this photo while Gimba was having lunch in the staff room, after having prepared meals for all 18 Covid-19 patients in our ward. She was having chicken and rice.”

The Duchess of Cambridge was joined on the judging panel for Hold Still by Nicholas Cullinan, the director of the National Portrait Gallery; Lemn Sissay, writer and poet; Ruth May, the chief nursing officer for England; and the photographer Maryam Wahid. The 100 images they selected will feature in a digital exhibition on the National Portrait Gallery website from September 14.

For more information, visit npg.org.uk/hold-still

#duchess of cambridge #kate middleton #holdstill

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grangerdangerfics · 4 years

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CW: fandom response to COVID-19 (Please scroll on by to take care of yourself if you need! ❤️) I’ve been seeing a lot of posts badgering fanfic authors to write more and update more frequently in this time of social distancing and quarantine.

I know this is probably well-intended, but please think twice before making posts or comments like that, or before reaching out to an author to demand more work.

We are in the midst of an emerging global crisis. Fanfiction writers come from all walks of life. Like everyone else, a lot of writers are still working our day jobs from home, sometimes with the unexpected addition of child co-workers. Some are still out working in healthcare and critical fields (THANK YOU 🙏🙏🙏).

Some are adapting to providing around-the-clock childcare.

Some writers have already been personally affected by COVID-19, and many more of us are likely to be in the days to come.

Some of us are struggling with our mental health in what is an objectively stressful time.

Some of us are chronically ill (like me!), and the amount of personal resources we have available does not expand because the rest of the world is joining us at home. Furthermore, those of us at higher risk are worried right now. Even if we are not personally at risk, a lot of us are justifiably worried right now: for our at-risk friends and family members, for our finances, for our jobs, for the economy, for the future. We are recalibrating our budgets. We are tightening our belts. We trying to process and adapt to a troubling situation that is changing every single day. Many of us are making huge changes to the shape of our lives in a really uncertain moment!

For me, Maslow’s hierarchy of needs has meant that creative writing has not been at the top of my list right now. It has seldom been making it onto my list at all. And I am hearing the same from a lot of my writing friends.

Fanfiction is a wonderful escape, and fandom community has been a reassuring beacon for me lately. And I get it - we can all really use fandom love and a good escape right about now. But the internet is deep! There are amazing stories out there that you have not read yet. Guaranteed. If you do reach out or post about it, just think about the person on the other end before you hit send. There’s a world of difference between, “I don’t understand why this story hasn’t updated when we’re all in quarantine! 🙄“ and “Wow! I love your story and look forward to every new chapter. How often do you think you’ll be updating it?” That’s my soapbox, friends. Sending love to all of you. Do whatever you need to to to take care of yourselves! Be gentle with yourselves and each other. And in the bastardized words of Kurt Vonnegut: babies, you’ve got to be kind. ❤️❤️❤️

#discourse #fanfiction #hp fanfic #covid-19

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toongrrl-blog · 4 years

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The Mommy Myth: The War Against Welfare Mothers (Part Two)

Let’s use a video to set up this post:

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Okay now to Reagan, who with his cohorts switched cause and effect: Welfare was now the cause of poverty and the economy was in a mess not because of money spent on Vietnam but because of poor people and them having so much kids! *read my sarcasm*

First thing on the chopping block? Aid to Families with Dependent Children. In 1973, there were 85% of children living in families that collected AFDC and by 1986, it was 60% and the benefits fell and the purchasing power was dropped by a third between 1970 and 1986, because they didn’t adapt to inflation or were cut. The Reagan Administration cut budgets for education (also blame him for why Baby Boomers paid less for college education), nutrition, and health programs and 500,000 families were forced off welfare and 400,000 people lost food stamps. Also poor women didn’t have access to prenatal care or information on birth control (how is the Religious Right looking for you?). We then got the “born again” welfare mother who renounced her former life of collecting checks at the same time that more affluent women were being urged back home by the “New Traditionalist” ad campaign by Mary Ellen Mark from Good Housekeeping magazine. These former welfare moms were given soundbites that spoke of internalizing the traits of the stereotype and unlike with the story about the white working mom, we never hear a former welfare kid say “I miss Mommy, I wish she stayed home again”, the most biting was a quote by a woman who said “Now I feel part of society again, I am a complete human being”, did I hear a pin drop?

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That was a scene from the 7th episode of Mrs. America, where the STOP ERA ladies (who would likely vote for and approve of Reagan) speak of how they don’t want to be “working girls” and Bella Abzug pointed out that they are already working outside the home and have the skills, I use this because clearly there has been a double standard where white women (or otherwise women of privilege) were encouraged to stay at home (even if they had someone do their housework and take care of their children) and it was seen as a privilege, a privilege that certainly welfare mothers, or otherwise poor women of color were not encouraged to stay home with the kids or they’d be seen as “lazy”. Granted for many welfare moms it was preferable to go to work and not deal with the system (I know it, right now because of COVID-19, I need to collect unemployment checks), which treated poor people like leeches or lepers and didn’t pay enough to live on (also the stigma of grocery shopping with food stamps), but the media focused on work or training programs that had successful clients and provided decent childcare, medical benefits, and transportation. There were moms who got up early in the morning to take a bus and ride an hour to her job and get home to put the kids to bed (it goes without saying that the kids often had to fend for themselves or have a relative, no matter how undependable, look after them). For more, here is a link to this comic here. Also sometimes the better paying jobs are out of town somewhere she cannot afford to live or even move the family to (also not everyone has a car).

This is where I’m going to stop, because I encourage you to read this fabulous and informative book and it’s getting exhausted for me. I also feel I have accomplished a few things: where I offer up this book as a supplement to the discussion of motherhood in Stranger Things (after seeing criticism of the period accurate parenting) and I get people on this site to take a look at how women have been screwed over in the long run and how we have so much work to do in gender equality. I also want to encourage people to check out the works of Susan J. Douglas, they are informative and entertaining.

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chrismalcolmhnd2c · 4 years

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Doorstep Portrait

©Annie Dresner

©Julie Michaelsen

“In time of test, family is best.” – Burmese Proverb.

Research the Narrative

In your workbook or blog, research Social Portraiture. There will be further tasks and support through the Contextual Studies class.

Tell the Story

Organise a group shot that will involve a minimum of three people.

Following restrictions imposed by lock down, photographers have been finding neW and inivitave ways to continue their practice of social photograhy, and in turn documenting the current situation.

You may interpret this brief in a variety of ways however the end product should display a group of sitters photographed safely on location.

The location will be the sitter’s residence or work place however consider the best place at the location to photograph the sitters. Windows, doorstep, garden shed? Have fun with the posing.

Good location, controlled lighting, co-ordinated styling, effective communication, and effective posing/composition will all add to the ‘experience’ for your sitters.

A parental consent form should also be created when any members of your group are under 16.

Edit and refine: Complete worksheet

These images should be of a quality suitable for a private client to purchase and print, retouching flaws, great composition, sharp and properly exposed.

Submission: One Final A3 folio print ready canvas with 2 significantly different images of the same group.

Initial research for Social Portraiture for “White Shirt”

https://chrismalcolmhnd2c.tumblr.com/tagged/white

Further research on Doorstep Portraiture

Coronavirus: Doorstep photo diaries capture life in lockdown

Published 21 May 2020

Magnus and Jenny have enjoyed spending more time together during the coronavirus lockdown.

Over the last eight weeks doorstep photos have provided some of the enduring images of Scotland's lockdown.

Families, couples and housemates are having socially-distant photographs taken at their front doors in an effort to record these unusual times.

Among those following the trend to create snapshots of modern life is Glasgow photographer Caro Weiss.

"I now have more than 100 shoots booked over the next four weeks," she said.

"I've done a great mix of people, artists, makers, couples, people with dogs, kids. I have been booked for an anniversary shoot, a 'should have been our wedding day' shoot, birthdays, and ones that friends have booked for their friends to cheer them up if they are finding it really tough.

"I can't wait to meet everyone. It's the highlight of my days now."

We asked some of her subjects to tell us about their lockdown experience.

Alison and Willie McBride

Alison and Willie McBride, both in their 60s, can't do their regular jobs at the moment.

"We've recently moved to this flat which fortunately has its own private garden which we are thankful for during lockdown and we spend time there reading and playing Scrabble. We sent our doorstep photos to our daughter and family living in America and our son, daughter-in-law and another daughter living in Manchester. We are trying to face this crisis with quiet resilience and the photos show a sense of being in it together and looking after each other."

Susanne Bell and Stephen Gallagher

Musicians Susanne Bell and Stephen Gallagher wanted to document lockdown with a growing bump.

"I'm currently 36 weeks pregnant and we wanted some photographs to document our lockdown with our growing bump! We've not been able to visit friends and family for three months now so we're really missing seeing them and showing off the baby bump. We are both musicians who play in bands and teach music so we are working from home with Stephen's son Johannes who is 12. We've been really lucky to have lots of musical instruments and projects to keep us busy. Stephen is in a band called Scaramanga and has been writing, recording (remotely) and releasing new music."

Jenny McLean and son Magnus

Jenny, 38, wanted to record Magnus' sixth birthday during the lockdown.

"We're coping well - we face Queen's Park, so we never feel too isolated with all the people coming and going for their daily exercise. We've kept busy through a combination of juggling work, craft projects, schoolwork and a worsening online shopping habit (I bought a 1960s swimsuit the other day… when I'm next going swimming, I have no idea!). We've been lucky to stay healthy throughout. It was Magnus's sixth birthday at the weekend so it seemed the perfect way to remember his day, and a time where - amidst the pandemic - I've felt really lucky to have more time with him, away from our usual busy lives."

Barbara Smith, Chris Macfarlane, Innes and Ishbel

Barbara, 37, Chris, 38, and their children Innes, 6, and Ishbel, 4, loved their "daft" photos.

"We are so pleased with our photos, they're so informal and more than a wee bit daft. Kids get big so quickly, it's a real treat to have a record of this time, even if it has been quite intense in parts! We are all healthy and enjoying having more family time, although I'm not sure I'm quite cut out for home schooling. I'm a wedding florist, so my business has been affected drastically, everything is either cancelled or postponed. Which at least means that I am able to take on childcare now that Chris has to work from home. He is a college tutor and is having to adapt to teaching his students online."

Cecilia Stamp, Greg Paterson and Leo

Cecilia Stamp is looking after her mum in nearby sheltered housing and has lost a family member to the virus.

"I'm a jeweller and I don't have full access to my workshop at the moment so I have been working as best I can but I really miss my workspace - especially as there's equipment I don't have at home. One of my main priorities has been looking after my mum who lives nearby in sheltered housing, doing food shops for her etc, as she can't go out. We've had a family member die from the virus down south, which was a huge shock as he was in good health, so it's been especially difficult for her too. We couldn't go to the funeral and trying to sort things remotely was a challenge."

Kenji Kitahama and Till Stowasser

Till, 42 and Kenji, 44, are both working from home.

"We're hanging in there and trying to make the best of the situation. We're very lucky in that both Till and I are able to work from home. Till is a professor and has been holding all of his lectures online since the beginning of March. I'm a bookbinder who makes bespoke photo albums and books. I run my small business from my home studio, so the lockdown hasn't affected my daily work routine a great deal. However, this is a time when I'm usually busy making wedding albums but since all of these celebrations have been cancelled or rescheduled, it's been a bit quieter. We're so grateful for all the frontline workers and of course, the postal service—who are making it possible to keep my little business afloat."

The McGarrigles

Eamon, 40 Claire, 40, Nancy, 5, and one-year-old Nena are getting used to sharing their space a lot more.

"We are currently adapting to the new way of life with Eamon now working from home. I'm no longer able to work as my place of work is temporarily closed due to Covid-19, so I am now attempting to be a home school teacher to Nancy who was in P1. We are missing our families and friends so much as we are both from Northern Ireland originally and have no family here in Glasgow. Our kids keep us sane and drive us mad in equal measures. I hope they will remember this time in their lives as the time we all got to hang out more, baked cakes, clapped with all our wonderful neighbours on a Thursday night and painted rainbows."

Terri Hawkins and Ernst

Terri Hawkins, 31 and Ernst Wolf, 2, have a flat full of flowers.

"I am a florist and rely mainly on weddings and events, so my business has been hugely affected. Me and my partner Angus fell through the cracks for government funding so we had major money panics. My business was the only way we could earn money, so we turned our living room into a dried flower workshop and came up with these flower arranging kits that people can make at home using dried flowers. They are great and keeping the whole family just afloat right now! Angus has started working for me, he's in charge of the logistics, computer stuff, ordering and I do all the making.

"Our house is a mess filled with flowers, our poor two-year-old has to watch TV every morning whilst we frantically work, we try and get it all done for lunch time then spend the day playing with our son Ernst! The online flower shop has been our families saviour, we are extremely grateful."

The Evans family - Mhairi, Maeve and Joe

Mhairi, 35, Joe, 36 and Maeve (who will be six next week) have made the best of a bad situation.

"Joe and I are working from home and juggling home schooling. We've all been lucky to be quite well but did have some mild symptoms near the beginning so went through isolation. It's pretty full on. Some days are fun, some days are really hard and we've all been up and down. Maeve is beginning to really miss her friends and her school. We're just trying to make the best of it but we miss our families and friends a lot. I have so much respect for all key workers and I'm happy to stay at home for as long as we have to if that keeps them safe."

Hazel Jane and George Windsor

Hazel Jane, 23 and Dr George Windsor, 29, had only moved in together in February and say their lockdown was a "cohabitation of fire".

"We're both lucky enough to continue working full-time from home throughout lockdown and we do this by rotating spaces between the kitchen table and the sofa. Neither of us have shown any symptoms so it's been a smooth ride in that sense, but we have certainly suffered the mental health dips that come with quarantine and won't be unhappy to see the end of it. We moved in together in February so this has been a cohabitation baptism of fire. Also, these are not the haircuts we went into quarantine with. Mine is now considerably longer, while George's DIY cut leaves lots to be desired."

Claire Jonston-Dawson, John and Eddy

Claire, 33, John, 30 and Eddy, 2 have enjoyed more time together in their "flat bubble".

"We co-own a tiny pizza restaurant with a friend, so life is completely different for us in lockdown as we are closed right now, and have been since mid-March. It has had its ups and downs, as we, like so many others, still wait to find out what financial help we're getting for our business, but restaurant aside we've adjusted to slower, much simpler days and getting to hang out together. And we know we are some of the lucky ones in this situation, so really just spend our days swinging from guilt to gratitude for our small but cosy flat bubble, to being overwhelmed and angry at the UK government."

Source: https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-scotland-52706375

Further Research

Photographers taking 'doorstep portraits' capture candid picture of life in lockdown from Kent's towns and villages

By Sean Delaney

Published: 27 May 2020

Photographers across Kent are taking candid shots of households on their doorsteps in a bid to document precious family memories and drum up funds for the NHS.

The industry was among those hardest hit by the lockdown restrictions as studios, weddings and other public places were all deemed out of bounds.

Couple Charlie and Lauren Moore in Snodland Photo: Strawberry Photography

But now so-called "doorstep photoshoots" are providing families with the chance to capture some priceless memories during these difficult times.

It has also afforded snappers a safe space in which to engage with clients and neighbours while also bringing in some much needed cash for their businesses and the health service.

New mum Sarah Hunt is currently running her business Strawberry Photography from her home in Snodland.

The 32-year-old usually focusses on weddings but as these have all now been rescheduled until next year the doorstep project has been providing a new outlet in-between caring for her three month old daughter Margot.

Each session is conducted outside and in line with government guidelines on the two metre distance, although in reality Sarah says it’s closer to four or five metres because of the quality of her camera lens.

Tony Legg and Jane Pullinger-Legg who is a nurse assessor in the NHS Photo: Strawberry Photography

"It was a little bit slow at first. I think people couldn't quite grasp the idea of how it worked," she said.

Work soon began to pick up and Sarah has been booked in for various sessions around Snodland which she times around her baby's feeds.

"These have been a lot of fun and gone down really well," she said. "My approach is very relaxed and informal which enables me to create real and candid photos."

"I was doing virtual shoots and these were okay but they are just not the same as getting out and taking photos".

Sarah has snapped everyone from a funeral director to a nurse assessor and her pet pooches.

But a group she has taken shots of regularly is mums-to-be and includes one expecting mum who found out she was pregnant just days before going into lockdown.

Funeral director Gray Reigate, pictured with wife Zoe, daughter Molly and Boris the boxer Photo: Strawberry Photography

She said: "As well as family photoshoots, I have also photographed mums to be which has been so great as many of them have been in lockdown since the start of their pregnancies, so this has been a lovely way for them to show off their bumps.

"Otherwise there is going to be people being like 'oh my god' you're pregnant.

"Adapting my business to be able to create these images for people in these unprecedented times has been extremely rewarding – It's also great to just get back out there with my camera."

Payment is collected through contactless means and £5 from every shoot is donated to the NHS.

Sarah is also part of a team of Kent wedding suppliers who are putting on a wedding worth £35,000 for one lucky NHS worker.

The competition is the brainchild of Lou Finn, owner of Ashford-based Bake To The Future who has brought together 52 suppliers to donate their services for free.

The Champion family photo: Estelle Thompson Photography

Another photographer who has been doing her part for the NHS is Sevenoaks-based Estelle Thompson.

The 46-year-old has been capturing a frank snapshot of what lockdown life has been like in the small village of Fawkham in Longfield.

Estelle's calendar would usually be booked up with weddings and baby shoots at this time.

But when the Coronavirus struck her business Estelle Photography ground to a halt and as a self-employed worker says she did not qualify for government relief.

She wrote on her blog: "My heart broke every time a bride contacted me to discuss new dates for a wedding that was long awaited and now would be pushed back further."

Scarlett and Harry used the photos to wish their nanny a happy birthday, as they couldn't be with her. Photo: Estelle Thompson Photography

The snapper filled her time taking shots of her dogs and birds on the garden feeder but said nothing could match up to the joy of "capturing the personalities and cheeky smiles" of people.

"We are never photographers because it pays the bills, we are photographers because we love it," she said.

Estelle noticed people talking about a project in America called "Doorstep portraits" and decided to emulate it in her own tiny village by posting on the Fawkham community Facebook page.

The response was simply overwhelming, she says, with so many people wanting to be photographed – mostly to document what the current time is like for their children.

It was this which was to serve as her main motivator throughout the period, she adds "for those kids to be able to turn around to their own kids and show them this is what it was like".

In return Estelle asked villagers for a £10 pledge to the NHS and has now amassed more than £500 thanks to various generous donations.

Adele Barker is the new priest-in-charge at Saint Marys Photo: Estelle Thompson Photography

She said: "So, I had photographed the village, the people that live here, the rocks and the rainbows.

"It is kind of my gift, to the village that I love, where both my home and my business is."

She recalls how even her husband became a hero in the village after dressing up as a Tyrannosaurus Rex and surprising a three-year-old boy from afar while having his birthday party in lockdown.

The photographer says the idea has since "spiralled" into a time capsule, with her being asked to bury a USB containing some of the doorstep portraits.

She even snapped the new priest Adele Barker who arrived at the local church St Marys in Longfield not long before lockdown.

"So much has changed," she said. "If you look back now the first photo had daffodils, now there is blue bells."

Estelle's husband dressed up as a dinosaur to celebrate neighbour Josh who was celebrating his third birthday in lockdown Photo: Estelle Thompson Photography

But even though she misses her family and friends Estelle says she is incredibly grateful for her village neighbours.

She added: "The community during this time has just been incredible –to have their experience to document."

David and Jemma Rannard of Click:Create Rannard's Photography and Design have been offering to take family portraits outside homes but also to record important events during lockdown.

David said: "The family photos have really taken off. It is a way for people to keep in touch during these terrible times.

"When we realised people were making the effort to stage VE Day parties at home we thought it could be a natural extension of what we do."

David and Jemma Rannard and daughter Eva of Click:Create at Iwade offering VE Day photos on your doorstep

Wife Jemma, a graphic designer, is usually on hand and the couple now have an apprentice in the shape of their nine-year-old daughter Eva.

The couple charge £20 for a 10-minute photo shoot and donate £5 to the NHS.

It’s an emotional pledge for the family who sadly lost a friend to Covid-19.

And while offers of work are now coming in from different parts of the county the couple say they are having to decline them.

He explained: "It really only started as a bit of a service to villagers in Iwade where we live. We have done a few in Sittingbourne but I didn't think it was right for us to travel too far.

"It really angers me when people don't take this situation seriously and ignore the advice we are being given. The more we all sacrifice now, the quicker it will be over."

Source: https://www.kentonline.co.uk/authors/sean-delaney/

#doorstep

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ledenews · 4 years

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Readying to Reopen the "Y"

Week 2 began earlier today across the Mountain State, part of Gov. Jim Justice’s phased reopening of West Virginia businesses and facilities. Normal is returning, folks, just in small increments—baby steps. Small business with 10 or fewer employees, grooming services, and small-numbered religious and funeral services may be held again. Restaurants can now serve outdoor dining in addition to curbside and pick-up services. As more folks get back to work, it will increase the need for dependable, and safe, childcare for area youth. The YMCA is ready to do its part as the Chambers facility in the Elm Grove will be offering childcare first before other services. Executive Director Adam Shinsky said he and his staff have been working diligently with the county and state health departments to get approval to reopen as a youth care facility. “Last week, our childcare staff and anyone in the building got tested for COVID-19,” Shinsky said. “We all got our results back so now we’re waiting for everything to get approved. Anyone that closed down in March had to reapply to open back up. Approval takes about a week, so our target date is May 11. We’re not sure yet how many kids we’ll be able to accommodate.” Shinsky noted that according to a YMCA press releases recently circulated, Camp-Y Adventures style care was slated to begin Tuesday, May 26. However, given the slow, rolling reopening of all types of businesses and attractions, he’s not envisioning a normal summer that kids are used to experiencing at the Y. Fun will still be held, just, it will take place primarily at the facility as opposed to planned trips and excursions. “It will probably be like that all summer,” Shinsky admitted. “We will have summer childcare, but not even sure if we’re going to have traditional summer camp. Shinsky added he knows the importance of summer childcare, noting, “Once the governor gave the time frame for things to open back up, we started receiving a ton of calls. I’d say 95 percent of them were about childcare.”

Executive Director Adam Shinsky noted the earliest the facility will be open to fitness classes would potentially be May 11, but it will likely take some time before the YMCA can offer its full array of classes and fitness opportunities, without restriction.

Fitness Revival

Job-going adults seeking care for their children aren’t the only inquiries being made of the YMCA. Members are looking forward to getting back inside to continue their fitness regimens. Gyms are supposed to start reopening during the Week 3 portion of the phases. That too could take place as early as Monday, May 11. But in what capacity and what all fitness-wise will be available at first? “The governor said he would announce a week beforehand about when Week 3 would begin,” Shinsky said. “So that gives us a target date of May 11, 18, or 25. We’re not sure what the restrictions will be to start. YMCA USA has done a pretty good job of telling us what’s happening in other states, but those states have been hit harder than West Virginia.” Shinsky is envisioning things like not all cardio machines available at once, limiting the number of people who can use free weights and limiting the numbers participating in the fitness classes themselves. The staff will continue to keep extra sanitary supplies on hand and will ensure things are wiped down, cleaned and sanitized, as the staff did prior to the closing. The good news is the gym and outside the facility will be available for classes. “Once we know the guidelines, we can get a better idea of what we can offer. But when the weather is nice, we can go outside and utilize all that space to spread out,” Shinsky said.

During the stay at home orders, YMCA staff and others have shifted gears in offering personalized classes and training, opting to record or live stream online. Vids are available both on the YMCA's Facebook page, as well as its YouTube channel

Training Online

The YMCA training staff didn’t want to leave their members hanging without fitness guidance during these unprecedented times. So they’ve been not only making pre-taped workout videos and uploading them to the Y’s YouTube Channel as well as live workouts on its Facebook page. “We have several options now for digital workouts and training session,” Shinsky said. “This way, people can catch a class at their convenience, either on Facebook or YouTube, or when there is a live workout. Last week we had a dumbbell free weight class, we’ve had a kettlebell class, and once a week, Jeremy Hays goes live for a workout for basketball players.” Hays, owner and lead trainer at Fadeaway Fitness, has offered up his services to get the Y’s youth basketball players working on skills and drills at home, in addition to his #BeatheTrainer challenge videos he posts to Twitter and Facebook. “At one point, we had 230 people tuned into a basketball workout,” Shinsky said. “These were uncharted waters for the Y, but we are a service organization, and that’s what we’re doing. A lot of gyms have held private workouts that they limited to members, but we have opened up ours to the community. Anybody can view and participate.” Shinsky said he can see the online offerings expanded as the slow crawl to normalcy continues, but potentially, continuing on into the future, adding “There will be a need for the foreseeable future. Some people are staying at home and wanting to stay healthy as they aren’t comfortable coming out and we’ll provide that option.”

What About Summer Basketball?

The Wheeling Recreation Department’s summer basketball leagues are a Wheeling institution; a much looked forward to sense of competition for middle school and high school athletes each summer. When the YMCA began partnering with the rec department a few years ago, it only improved the popular program. That too may be in jeopardy, though no final decision has been made yet. “We spoke briefly a couple of weeks ago,” Shinsky said. “We weren’t sure we’ll be able to do it, and, if I had to give my opinion, I don’t think it’ll happen this summer. I can’t see any sports program happening—that’s my personal belief. I hope I’m wrong.” Shinsky noted the Y is partnering and hosting the inaugural Boogie Johnson Football and Cheering Camp for later summer. He thinks that may be the first event actually held, followed by flag football and so on as the calendar turns to fall. Read the full article

#ChambersYMCA #Childcare #coronavirus #COVID19 #ElmGrove #pandemic #wheeling #YMCA

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nestleeds · 4 years

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Pregnancy, scans & the COVID-19 pandemic

Today is Thursday 2nd April and I write to you today from a desk in the spare room. I’ve been relegated from the kitchen as since I last wrote, as my 2 year old daughters childcare arrangements have come crashing down and she is home for most of the week now.

I want to just say before I talk about what's been going on in my life this past week, that I am extremely grateful for this pregnancy, it was planned and wanted and very carefully considered in the light of what happened to me last time. I have someone who is very close to me go through devastating miscarriages last year and the stress I feel at the moment in relation to this pregnancy and the virus are always balanced against knowing how incredibly lucky I am, to even have these worries at all.

The newest challenge I’ve faced since I last wrote was my 20 week scan which was yesterday. I guess I was already feeling anxious about this milestone, with or without the current COVID-19 lockdown. It’s another thing that I knew would probably trigger some difficult memories and remind me once again that I have a birth to prepare for. So I’ve been avoiding thinking about it and actually - with us staying at home all the time I feel like I’ve entered into this little bubble and outside influences have become almost easier to avoid in a way. But I had my online EFT session on Monday, and the first thing the therapist asked if there was anything coming up that was making me feel anxious. I almost immediately burst into tears - literally just switched on the Zoom call - how embarrassing - clearly the anxiety was there and it had been building up, but I’d not acknowledged it.

If anyone wants to know more about EFT, I found an NHS info sheet here - http://www.dchs.nhs.uk/assets/public/dchs/services_we_provide/service-directory/our-services/healthpsychology/Energy%20Therapies/Emotional%20Freedom%20Technique%20-%20short%20form.pdf Or even better there are loads of videos on Youtube that show you how it works and how you can do it yourself.

I spent my online session tapping through my anxieties, identifying affirmations that made me feel calmer and I wrote these down to use on the day of my appointment. The anxiety, predictably, was around unknown factors, things out of my control. So far there was nothing to say this pregnancy was anything but normal but we all know these scans are done to help identify any abnormalities so I was anxious about dealing with any potential bad news alone. But, also, would all the staff be wearing contamination suits? Would there be sick patients everywhere? Would it be like an episode of ER? Would I need to wear protective clothing?? I had also heard rumours that birth partners were not allowed to come to the scans anymore…

There didn’t seem to be any central (Government) guidance about this stuff, information was localised, with providers having their own policies and procedures around managing COVID-19. So I checked the hospital website and yeah there it was, I would definitely have to go it alone. Strangely seeing it all there in black and white made it feel a bit more manageable. I knew what I needed to do, the ‘what ifs’ had been taken out of the equation.

The day before my scan was due I was called by the maternity department at the hospital to check if I was well or experiencing any COVID-19 symptoms, the website indicated that this would happen, luckily I am currently well – so no problems there.

The next day, I set off for the hospital, I had written down my affirmations the night before and said them out loud in the car;

I am strong; I am safe; I can do this for my baby;I am open to whatever happens today...

I definitely had a wobble but tapped through the anxiety and I could feel the anxiety melting away. By the way, I have always been a bit of a sceptic with this stuff but its amazing how open you can become when you desperately want to feel ok! Anyway - it worked. I arrived feeling pretty calm. Everything appeared as normal in the hospital, the car park was heaving – ha! How reassuring. I went to the reception, the staff were wearing masks and gloves but nothing scary - also I hadn’t been required to wear/do anything different - just to wash my hands – they asked me if I was feeling well, which I was. Waiting in reception, there were a few signs asking people to respect social distancing rules, sit 2 metres apart etc but again, nothing too drastic, it was super quiet. I was called in on time by the sonographer, he and his colleague were again wearing masks and gloves but it didn’t feel different to scans I’ve had before. All was well! What a relief, there were definitely tears but these were of relief not worry. I got my snaps – FREE – as there was nobody to come and maintain the cash machine – haha – a small silver lining.

The next time I write it will probably be relevant to talk about my birth preferences, I do have some. I desperately want it to be a healing experience for me, coupled with, of course, getting baby here safely. I know that COVID-19 may mean some of that has to change which I need to be at peace with. There was lots of other information on the hospital website, aside from what is happening with scans, about labour, birth and how this looks at my chosen hospital.

My learning from this recent experience is that I need to NOT put off looking at this. My advice for anyone pregnant and preparing for their births, is to speak to their midwife or hospital, look on the hospital website, its scary, but you may end up feeling more reassured. In the meantime, babies continue to be born, everyday, and there are loads of positive stories online at the moment about what its like to give birth amongst the pandemic – see @thepositivebirthcompany, @positivebirthmovement and @birthbetter on Instagram.

If you have any other worries you can call the free PANDAS helpline - 0808 1961 776 for support with any aspect of perinatal mental health.

#pregnancy pregnancysupport mumtobe scan anxiety nestleeds mindwellleeds

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jobsearchtips02 · 4 years

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I mysteriously got COVID while pregnant and strictly separating

Visit Company Expert’s homepage for more stories

So for months, I stayed away from individuals, washed my hands constantly, and cleaned down everything in sight.

Throughout this time, I hardly ever left my home.

My partner, 2-year-old kid, and I were exposed to only 3 other individuals frequently for the purposes of kid care.

I developed these strict quarantine systems due to the fact that I was frightened of the virus. I learnt I was pregnant at the start of the pandemic and at that time– as unfortunately remains the case today— medical professionals had little knowledge worrying the effects of the infection on fetuses and pregnancy.

But I had actually read enough scary anecdotal stories of premature births in COVID-infected moms, women being separated from their infants at birth to prevent infection, and indications of the infection crossing or damaging the placenta to make me really, extremely worried.

Then I got a favorable COVID test.

I woke one early morning in June with a headache and sinus discomfort and went to a doctor. I was identified with a sinus infection and prescribed an antibiotic. I inquired about COVID, and the doctor stated that there was practically no chance I had the virus.

I asked for a COVID test anyway out of an abundance of care.

2 days later, my spouse got a serious headache and moderate fever.

Then, five full days after getting evaluated for the coronavirus, my results came back favorable.

We were stunned by the outcomes. The following hours and days were a blur of fear, stress and anxiety, and utter confusion.

Already, I had actually invested months taken in by COVID news for my work as a reporter. What had become my most significant worry over those months had quietly breached all my defenses and contaminated us, and was possibly damaging my unborn kid.

From my research study, I understood that if my blood oxygen levels dropped– a typical problem in extreme cases of COVID– my child would remain in grave threat. He relies on oxygen in my blood to make it through, and even a couple hours of low oxygen can trigger severe problems

It was hardly reassuring that my signs had actually so far been rather mild. COVID is hugely unpredictable and frequently clients can start to feel better before ending up hospitalized on breathing machines. Some clients have even suffered ” silent hypoxia,” suggesting their blood-oxygen levels have actually dropped to hazardous levels without them knowing.

These worries gripped me all day and night, as I compulsively inspected my oxygen levels with a pulse oximeter. At the very same time, I was trying to safely care for my active young child and shield from him the debilitating tiredness and anxiety attack that struck me without warning.

Throughout the illness, I was also tortured by the possibility that we might have infected the three individuals whom we regularly saw for childcare. Luckily, that worry faded after we found out– following a week-long await outcomes– that they all checked negative.

Another moment of solace came when I could finally get an ultrasound of my child, where I learned that he seemed establishing on track. My appointment was delayed 3 times after my 14- day COVID quarantine ended, as my doctors– who had actually not yet dealt with a COVID-positive client at my phase of pregnancy– had a hard time to select when they would feel comfy seeing me. This wait was distressing.

My husband and I now count ourselves amongst the fortunate survivors of this virus, however we feel little enduring relief. There are still lots of unknowns concerning whether we will deal with long-lasting impacts, and I’m currently fearing reinfection provided recent news about the short life expectancy of COVID antibodies that supply resistance. I also just recently discovered that a baby who was contaminated with the coronavirus in the womb was born with inflammation in his brain I am haunted by how little I in fact learn about how this infection will affect my unborn kid.

But I hope our story works as a plain reminder to never ignore mild signs or believe that you don’t pose a risk to others because you’ve been watchful. Research study shows this infection can impact all our significant organs and we understand it can kill Even if you survive– even if you have no signs at all– scientists merely don’t have enough information to know whether the damage it causes will be irreversible.

What’s particular is that the secret of our infection source will never ever be resolved.

Did a contaminated runner breathe out on me while I was out on a walk? Did we contract it through surface contamination from the mail– which professionals have considered an not likely source of infection?

We’ll never know.

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from Job Search Tips https://jobsearchtips.net/i-mysteriously-got-covid-while-pregnant-and-strictly-separating/

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whorchataaa · 4 years

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Maintaining Sanity while Working at Home with Kids

I have been talking with neighbors, friends, and friends of my adult kids to see how COVID-time has impacted working parents with children. Some parents love working from home. They find they are more productive and more creative than ever. They are enjoying having so much family time. They hope and wish that they will never have to go back to 9 to 5, five days a week. “What’s not to love about working remotely?” they ask. No commute. Working in sweats. No distractions from difficult coworkers. And lots more family time. These are not the people I worry about.

Some parents, like those quoted below, are finding staying home a major challenge. They are reporting frustration, disappointment, disillusionment, and burn out. They often feel guilty that they aren’t being more productive for work and that they aren’t keeping up with their kids’ home schooling. They feel even more guilty that they aren’t enjoying spending all day with the children they love. They wish and hope to get their kids back to day care and school — and themselves back to work ASAP.

“I remember telling my wife, ‘We’ve got this’ when we first went into lockdown. Our kids, ages 8 and 10, love to do craft projects and they are both readers. How hard could it be? Was I ever wrong! — My teacher wife struggles to put math lessons online. Until a week ago, she still had over 100 middle school kids to interact with. That was on top of schooling our own kids. Our kids complain about boredom. I can’t get my work done. We have all started losing out tempers — and maybe our minds.”

“As a single mom of two young teens, I’m always behind in getting my work tasks done. I’m frustrated with trying to get the kids to do their schoolwork. I’m sick of the daily battle to get them off their phones and outside. I’ve had it with their whining and begging to let them go see friends. I don’t give in to it (I do love them soo much) but I admit I sometimes think to myself, ‘Fine. Go ahead. Go hang out and get sick.’ Then I feel terrible that I even feel that way.”

“How are we doing? It depends on the day. Sometimes the kids are cooperative and find things to do. While my husband and I try to do our remote work, they work on school assignments pretty independently. Other times they are underfoot wanting to be entertained. I don’t want any of us to get sick, but we’re kind of sick of each other by now.”

What’s the difference between parents who love working remotely and those who don’t? I suggest that it is not the “working from home” that puts people under stress. Parents of babies who are young enough to nap and stay put, playing and cooing, next to mom or dad or whose kids are old enough to not need constant supervision have generally been able to manage well. But parents of kids from age 1-12 are tearing their hair out as they try to do the double duty of job and child school and supervision. That’s especially true for those who are fielding multiple kids at multiple ages and stages.

No one planned for this. No one had time to adjust in an orderly way. One week the adults were on the job and the kids were in school or daycare. The next week they were all home. Boom.

At times the double duty can feel almost impossible — only because it is. There is no way to effectively work the usual 8 hour day and also provide 6 hours of “school” or 8 hours of daycare at the same time.

In an attempt to be helpful, I researched strategies that at least some families some of the time are using to stay reasonably sane in this crazy-making time. I share these stress-busters only as ideas for you to consider as you do your best to manage the weeks and maybe months ahead.

6 Tips for Maintaining Sanity

1. External structure is essential. Kids thrive on structure, even when they fight against it. Households that are running well have a set a time for play, a time for school work, a time for naps, a time for meals, a time for bed, etc. The regularity makes kids feel more secure. Structure and predictability free the adults from having to constantly make decisions about what to do next.

2. Establish definite on-duty and off-duty times for childcare. When every adult feels in charge of the kids all the time, no one gets much done. It’s more helpful if the adults define “shifts.” The person not on kid-duty then feels free to focus on work. The kids know who to go to for what they need.

Parents who don’t have live-in partners count on grandparents, relatives, or other parents. Some form “quarantine pods” with other families who share the same COVID safety standards, so the adults can switch off the care, entertainment, and schooling for kids. — Yes, child-free time may be less than what people had pre-COVID, but they often find that their efficiency increases when their uninterrupted time for work is limited and precious.

3. Set realistic expectations for home schooling: Build school time into the daily schedule so getting down to assignments isn’t a daily argument. As much as you can, do your work while they do theirs. Insist on quiet, uninterrupted periods (even if it’s in 15-minute blocks) while everyone gets down to work. Build in breaks. Build in check-in times.

Don’t expect yourself to keep exactly the same school schedule or to take the place of trained teachers. You can’t! But you can give your kids the message that their education is important by taking it seriously. Fortunately, most schools do provide packets of materials and assignments, both online and in the mail. There are also numerous sites online to help. It will go better if you do your own “homework” and take a little time the night before to review the lessons for the next day and round up whatever supplies the kids are going to need.

4. Stay connected: Things people mean to get around to when they have time often end up not happening enough or at all. That includes social time. Schedule regular meetings with coworkers and regular social time with family and friends via zoom, messages, and phone calls to help fend off feelings of isolation.

Kids need to keep up with their friends, too. Set up regular Zoom get togethers the kids can look forward to. If you have young kids, rotate responsibility for these get-togethers with the parents of your kids’ friends. Adults can read stories, host sing-alongs, or lead games like “Simon Says” that can be done remotely. With teens, do talk with them about how you can balance their need for privacy with adequate monitoring to keep everyone safe.

5. Self-care is family care: Selflessness is a set up for failure. It’s a mistake to skip meals or cut down on sleep or to forego any kind of exercise in order to get job tasks or household chores done. It only results in “running on empty.” Don’t feel guilty for attending to at least some of your own needs.

6. Give yourself credit: Working from home while parenting kids isn’t something any of us were prepared for. We can only do our best to manage the double duty and stay reasonably sane in the process. As tempting as it is to just collapse, take a moment at the end of each day to breathe and give yourself credit for what went right. Make a mental list of three things you can feel grateful for. Positive psychologists assure us that doing so will help us feel better and be more able to get up and do it all again tomorrow.

from https://ift.tt/3gBf1UD Check out https://peterlegyel.wordpress.com/

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ashley-unicorn · 4 years

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Maintaining Sanity while Working at Home with Kids

No one planned for this. No one had time to adjust in an orderly way. One week the adults were on the job and the kids were in school or daycare. The next week they were all home. Boom.

6 Tips for Maintaining Sanity

from https://ift.tt/3gBf1UD Check out https://daniejadkins.wordpress.com/

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erraticfairy · 4 years

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Maintaining Sanity while Working at Home with Kids

No one planned for this. No one had time to adjust in an orderly way. One week the adults were on the job and the kids were in school or daycare. The next week they were all home. Boom.

6 Tips for Maintaining Sanity

from World of Psychology https://ift.tt/3gBf1UD via theshiningmind.com

#World of Psychology #child psychology

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positivepsychologyinterventions · 4 years

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Maintaining Sanity while Working at Home with Kids

No one planned for this. No one had time to adjust in an orderly way. One week the adults were on the job and the kids were in school or daycare. The next week they were all home. Boom.

6 Tips for Maintaining Sanity

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#IFTTT #World of Psychology

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brentrogers · 4 years

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Maintaining Sanity while Working at Home with Kids

No one planned for this. No one had time to adjust in an orderly way. One week the adults were on the job and the kids were in school or daycare. The next week they were all home. Boom.

6 Tips for Maintaining Sanity

Maintaining Sanity while Working at Home with Kids syndicated from

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glimmerbugart · 4 years

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Checking In.... How's Your Self Distancing Going? I'm Gonna Rant for a Minute So Buckle Up.

It’s like Day 7 of our self distancing exercise because of this CoronaVirus COVID-19. So far so good. No complaints here so far. We’ve spent the week getting ourselves into a new routine, figuring out home schooling activities, technology stuff, meal planning and checking on our friends and family members.

Have you been able to keep up with what you need at the store with groceries and whatnot? How about food and take out? How’s your job situation going? I just cannot fathom the stress that some of you are feeling right now having to not only deal with the stress of actually getting this illness, but then on top of it, losing your job or your wages because of all the shutdowns and changes in our ways of life. It’s scary to me, and I cannot even imagine what it must feel like to some of you. Seeing all these companies, businesses, restaurants, shops and stores post that they’re closing for the time being is just heartbreaking. And I have no words of comfort. No words of wisdom. I don’t want to say it’ll be okay, because who knows if it will. There’s just no telling what’s going to happen. I’d like to offer a hug, but we need to stand 6 feet away.

And then to think about all these families that have kids at home from school, who are trying to balance education concerns, home schooling, work schedules, work from home schedules, no childcare, no activities… it’s just mind boggling. I can’t even put it into words what superheroes these parents are. The ones who are living a real-life nightmare, trying to figure out how this is going to impact them and how they will come out on the other side of this. Just crushing. To give you a high five for all of your efforts and constant struggle during such a stressful time would be awesome. But alas, I must stand at least 6 feet away.

And then to think about our teachers and administration. They’re thrown into the wolves on this entire process. Who the hell expected this to happen? And to last… indefinitely? They’re thrust into trying to work on an electronic platform long term, amend their lessons and plans to try and get them to work for the majority of the students and then try and stay in communication with those students without actually being with them in person to explain how to do something if they have a question or concern. Never mind the poor kids that are on an IEP or even the students that do not have access to any sort of electronic device to start with. Holy canoli, it just makes me so so sad for the entire education community. And it makes me mad for the education community as well. Angry because they’re doing the best that they can in a circumstance that nobody would have ever believed was going to happen, even if we predicted it through a crystal ball.

The other day I was in the “drive through pick up line” at my kids school, picking up the packets of work that the teachers had put together to hand out to parents in a car line at the school. In the pouring rain, there stood a group of teachers and teachers aides with walkie talkies, taking people’s names and then providing them with their packets of materials. Standing out in the rain, working their asses off after I’m sure burning the midnight oil trying to come up with tools to send to these kids for the time being that was relevant to their learning plans. All 3 of my kids and I thanked these teachers profusely for everything that they have done to get to this point, their constant communication and their magic ways of putting together lesson plans on the fly with hardly any preparation time. It’s incredible how hard both teachers and administration are working to try and make this entire situation work for all of their students and parents. And I hope that we as parents and care givers can see that. I cannot even imagine their stress during such circumstances as this worldwide shutdown for the next several (let’s hope it’s just that) weeks. You’re doing a kick ass job and we are all (or at least the majority of us are and should be) thankful for all that you’ve done to roll with the punches that you have been dealt. Give yourselves a pat on the back. I totally would… if I didn’t have to stand 6 feet away.

And I feel guilty. Guilty because I’m home. Because I’m always at home being a stay at home parent. Guilty that I have the means to sit at our dining room table with my 3 and go over anything they have questions on, show them how to figure out their math worksheets, and cheer them on when they get some random question correct on their online tutorial. It’s like having survivor’s guilt. And shame because I know there are so many that don’t have an ounce of what I’m lucky enough to have. And I can’t even try to help them by offering them to use our computer or telling a working mom that I can watch her kid while she must go into work. If I could, I would. If we didn’t have to keep ourselves 6 feet away.

I think during such a stress-filled, traumatic time for everyone, we must remember to be calm. Be kind. Be thoughtful and be understanding. Keep calm. Don’t hoard. Don’t overbuy. Take a deep breath and chill out if you feel yourself getting worked up (I had to do this earlier and my husband had to remind me to cut the shit and chill out because it’s not worth getting worked up about shit you can’t control.)

Be kind. If you’ve got an elderly or handicapped neighbor, call them. Ask them if they need anything and leave it on their doorstep. They’re scared shit-less from this entire ordeal. Put them first.

Be thoughtful. Send a card to a relative or friend who might be struggling with this entire process. Check on the people in your life that might need a little extra attention or pick up. Give a ring to someone who lives alone to offer a nice conversation about anything. Doesn’t have to be a sad-filled rant session. Talk about stupid shit and laugh. Because laughter is the best medicine. Also, just because you’re younger and think you’re healthier than most, doesn’t mean you can’t get someone else sick. And that might be a matter of life and death to that other person. So think before you decide you need to absolutely go out of the house for whatever it is you need. Put others first.

Be understanding. Don’t try and police people and think you know better than they do. They’re doing what they can to make this the best for their family. Maybe the guy at the grocery store buying an extra package of facial tissues has a toddler at home that has a cold. Or maybe the lady in front of you at the grocery store has too many packages of baby wipes. Maybe she’s buying them for her daughter who just had twins. Point is, you don’t know what the story is with people and what is going on behind their closed doors. So be understanding. Keep your mouth shut. Offer a smile and go about your own business. And put other people’s feelings first.

One more thing… and then I’ll pipe down. There’s no need to act like a complete lunatic if you are out in public. I have heard several horror stories over the last week of people screaming at other people to stand back! Wash your hands! Put on sanitizer! Get away from me! Seriously, what the hell kind of behavior is that? Stop acting like a freakin’ nut job and calmly ask someone to step back or to wash their hands. There’s no need to be shrieking and yelling like a complete crazy asshole when asking politely and calmly might generate a more positive response.

Okay, my rant and lecture is over. Soap box is put away. I just wanted to get this off my chest because it’s been bugging me since the other day and I wanted to make sure I shared how I felt because I’m wondering if others are feeling the same way.

Truth be told, I’m actually enjoying being home with the kids and hubby. It’s simpler. It’s less hectic. It’s a home cooked dinner (and every meal for that matter) every day. I’m wondering if when this is all over, I’ll look back and miss it once the house is empty again. I wonder if I’ll miss all the ruckus and noise and “Mom?” questions. Guess only time will tell…

#Social Distancing #Quarantine #COVID-19

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