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#the skull is a reproduction can’t find a nice shot of an actual skull
degeneratekitten · 4 years
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Breeding Woes (edited)
EDIT: I just wanted to make sure I gave credit to bitesized-degeneracy for posting this originally, I was hesitant to post at first because I’m not a big fan of tumblr, but it didnt take much for me to be convinced to make a blog.
This is a whump story, read the tags and don’t read if you don’t like it.  There is an alternate ending to this that I wanted to post, I only gave this one an ending so I could end it if I didn't have the inspiration to continue. Turns out I did have the inspiration and wrote the other ending.
!!!WARNING!!! READ TAGS BEFORE READING. BITTY TORTURE. DONT LIKE DON’T READ.
“Through a stroke of luck you’ve come into possession of pregnant pygmy bitty. Now all you have to do is put up with his misbehavior until he gives birth.”
“Thank you for taking him in, I just couldn’t handle him anymore.” The guilty face of the middle aged woman gave you pause. You felt slightly bad for her, after all, the snivelling pygmy in your arms, simply would not stop crying out to her.
“Mommy please, I’m sorry, I know I’m a bad bitty but I love you so much!” It cried, its swollen pregnant belly adding an extra layer of tragedy to this. The woman gave the bitty an exasperated, helpless look.
“Don’t cry Bud. This woman right here will take good care of you. She’s agreed to be your new mommy.” She started holding out a finger to wipe away “Bud’s” tears.
The bitty violently shook his head crying out. “No mommy please I’ll be a good bitty I promise!!!” The response was typical, a common phrase that the woman had no doubt heard a million times. Bitties tended to have a very limited amount of phrases that they shot out at times like this, “Bud’s” being the most common.
An exasperated sigh escaped from the woman's lips. She couldn't help but to turn her back away from the bitty her shoulders slumping into defeat. Instead of letting this charade continue on, you placed the  pregnant bitty into a small house.. “Don't worry Bud, I’ll take good care of you.” You assured the bitty, giving it a charming smile as you closed and locked the door, effectively sealing him in.
Turning back to the woman you continued your conversation. “It’s not a problem, I know how expensive pregnant bitties are. Let alone ones who misbehave as much as Bud. But I can guarantee that he’ll be taken care of while here.” You smiled, placing a hand on the poor woman’s shoulder as you led her to the door.
The woman let out a relieved sigh as soon as the lamia bitty was safely locked away. A few hours before the lamia had managed to slither its way into her purse before she left, causing her to come back an extra time. “Really I can’t thank you enough. My son just couldn’t handle him, with his pranks, his escapes, and whenever he would have his heats he would just say and do the worst things to my son.” She shuddered at the mention of the pygmy’s heat before continuing. “I just couldn’t let him be around my son for any longer. Then when he got pregnant.. Really it was just the last straw.” Shaking her head she smiled one last time at you before finishing. “But anyways I need to get to work, his little escape has already made me late. Goodbye.” She waved allowing you to say a quick goodbye before hurrying out the door. Leaving you alone with the cries of a pregnant pygmy.
As soon as the middle aged woman left you closed the door behind you, and glanced back at the bitty house the sounds of cries were coming from. From what the woman had been telling you earlier, this bitty was in serious need of training. Especially for during its heats.
The bitty in question was a stray, found by the woman's son during a storm. He was trapped inside of a plastic Tupperware container slowly filling with water. It had been holding on for dear life before being found. Apparently it had been abandoned, with useless, and slut scratched onto the container. Showing just how much it had angered the previous owner.
However despite having had a previous owner, the bitty in question was also quite disloyal. Quickly latching onto the son as his new “daddy”, while also having quite the proclivity to switch its love between the mother and son.
The most troubling part however was how it projected its sexual attention onto the son, constantly saying wildly inappropriate things to the son before, during, and after its heats. Humping, pleas for sex, and even attempting to wiggle its way towards the sons pants during these times not at all uncommon. During its last heat the mother had been so disgusted with “Bud’s” behavior that she had thrown him out the window during the night. Which had resulted in the bitty’s pregnant status.
Sighing to yourself you approached the bitty house, unlatching the door and giving the lamia a calculating look.
The clothes the bitty wore were stained with various things, mostly makeup that he’d apparently gotten into while inside the woman’s purse. The woman had commented on how expensive her makeup was, and just how much she would have to replace because of him, she also lamented on the loss of her bag, which had previously been white, but was now stained from the inside out with various hues of red and black. She hadn't been happy after reaching work to discover Bud had not only stowed away in her bag, but also tried to make himself “pretty” in an attempt to change mommy’s mind. His so called attempt to make himself pretty involved drawing flowers on his skull and tail in rouge, scribbling eyeliner onto the rims of his eye sockets, and staining his teeth and clothes in lipstick. The clothes in question that he’d ruined were actually rather nice, having previously been a nice white button up shirt with a cute blue bow tie in place of his signature blue handkerchief.
In addition there was also a rather disproportionate puddle of blue tears staining the floor of the bitty house. The floor was made out of smooth stone specifically for this type of situation. Many bitties found their way into your home, always in some state of distress, but you were nothing if not prepared. Reaching in with your gloved hand you gently picked up the pygmy, noting wryly to yourself the strange look it sent your way.
“You’re my new mommy?” It asked, showing its rather disloyal nature once again. You knew that you’d have to fix that little problem, and honestly it was something that would have to be done towards the end of your training.
You were a professional bitty trainer, your methods were “unique,” but also extremely effective. You took full advantage of the manufactured origin of bitties with your training. That didn't mean however that you were happy with just how much work Bud was going to be.
The history of bitties was actually rather unique, they had started out as a manufactured products, ones that had ended up as little more than a fad, and quickly fizzled out. The manufacturers of bitties had very quickly discontinued the product as liabilities of many bitties classified as more of a “protection” variety had been advertised very poorly, resulting in many unsuspecting families adopting dangerous bitties like pure bites, edgies, errors, and even poisonous varieties of lamia’s. There were very few disclaimers, and the company had been under the mistaken assumption that families would understand that the “protection” bitties were simply not meant to be family pets. 
After a disastrous wave of accidents, maulings, and even deaths at the hands of the protection variety bitty, the company found itself drowned in lawsuits. It very quickly was forced to declare bankruptcy before simply imploding from within and going out of business.
The bitties themselves were expected to completely disappear outside of niche communities who had managed to get a hold of the manufacturing process of the bitties, but as is the nature of products created by magic, the bitties surprisingly after about 5 years developed the ability to reproduce.
At first it was more of an asexual reproduction, but soon later generations of bitties developed the ability to reproduce sexually, developing heats, ectoplasmic genitals, and creating larger amounts of offspring than asexual reproduction could yield. Many studies dedicated to this anomaly were launched only to yield the same unsatisfying result. Magic is weird.
Despite the evolution of bitties however they still retained their “manufactured” traits. Their fierce dependency on caretakers had remained, their infantile and limited cognitive abilities, along with their seeming inability to stray from specific personalities that the original bitties were programmed with. Their newly formed ability to reproduce had caused quite the stir, and their numbers climbed to staggering rates, flooding the streets, and overrunning animal shelters. Soon they became one of the most common household pets with many stores from the original fad reopening to sell dedicated bitty products. Their quick evolution sparked a fierce debate as to whether or not they had basic human rights, however their childish nature and dependency remained the biggest obstacle for such rights.
Either way you made your money from breeding and training bitties for more specialized positions, seeing eye bitties were sorely needed, and you very specifically offered special deals for disabled children of struggling families. You yourself previously had a beloved Chain bitty that went with you everywhere. Bitties were some of the easiest to train simply taking advantage of the “programmable” nature of bitties to made the process easiest.
As for your interest in Bud, despite the fact that bitties could reproduce now, it was still rather difficult to find one that could reproduce in captivity. Which was why this new bitty was so interesting to you. It looked as if his clutch would be one of the biggest you’d ever seen, furthermore this was his first.
Grinning down at the pregnant lamia you brought him closer to you. “Yes, I’m your new mommy.” You stated a genuine loving smile gracing your lips, watching as the lamia’s eyes widened in wonder. Quickly the sniveling pygmy erupted into chatter, tears no longer streaming down its face. You listened to his mindless chatter, stunned by how quickly it had gotten over his previous “mommy.” You’d been prepared to spend a long time bonding with him in an attempt to form at least some trust. 
“You’re not upset anymore?” You asked carefully, taking your hand and moving the lamia’s skull in your hand and moving it side to side to examine the flowers on his skull. 
A sad look crossed the baby blues face “I’m still sad, but I know you’ll take care of me. After all, I am the greatest. Mwehehe.” He laughed, looking at you confidently. 
Shaking your head in disbelief at the pygmy’s answer you started walking towards the bathroom, making a decision to get the pregnant lamia cleaned up before continuing. You continued asking the pygmy simple questions, such as what his favorite food was, his favorite music, what he liked to read. Unsurprisingly many of the questions were the standard pygmy responses, the same answers you’d heard from countless pygmies.
His excited chatter didn't stop at all, and you really weren't the talking type so you let him speak, while you cleaned him up. Although your annoyance at the repeated phrase of “Mwehehe” grew as the bath went on.
After the little guys bath you didn't immediately give him clothes, you had to search for clothes that would fit his pregnant frame, the size of this lamia’s clutch was decidedly incredibly huge simply due to the fact that it was even distending his belly and not just limiting itself to his tail. You really couldn't wait for him to give birth to his clutch, after all properly trained lamia bitties were worth quite a pretty penny. Furthermore it was clear that you would have to wait to start the baby blue’s training after he gave birth.
However many problems arose after the first greeting, ones that you’d never had with previous pygmies. 
You thought that you could let him roam for a bit to get used to his new surroundings, but quickly it became apparent “just” how misbehaved this bitty was.
He did not stop talking, not an entirely unusual trait for pygmies, but he always spoke over you, interrupting your sentences when you did decide to speak, and getting upset if you talked for even a little bit longer than normal. You corrected him a lot, scolding him for interrupting you, and giving him time outs when he refused to stop. However none of it seemed to help, and unfortunately corporal punishment was simply off the table as long as he was pregnant.
He peed everywhere, really it was quite astonishing how resolute he was in “not” using the bitty toilet. You tried asking him why he didn't like using the toilet only to be given what the bitty thought was a “cute” laugh.
“Mwehehe. Awww, I didn't mean to mommy it was an accident!” Or “The bathrooms just so far away, carry me mommy!” And even. “But then I would have to stop having fun!”
Despite your best attempts at trying to convince Bud to use the bathroom in the bitty house, it became apparent that he simply enjoyed “marking” a trait typical of stray bitties.After about 5 days you ended up having to discard the bitty house you had for him, and instead moved him to an easily cleanable enclosure you usually kept baby bitties in. Which led to your next problems. 
He threw tantrums. Phrases such as  “MOMMY IS THE WORST!!!” or “I HATE YOU MOMMY!” and even “GIVE IT TO ME!” Were common. 
He would throw himself onto the floor wailing and crying, and when you tried to approach to calm him down he would often bite, scratch, and hit you in his tantrums. He seemed to know just how much you were holding back on punishing him because of his pregnant status and seemed to take pleasure in pushing the boundaries of your tolerance.
Furthermore, he was an escape artist. If you had to leave for even a moment you would typically leave him with plenty of activities that he would enjoy, puzzles, coloring books, mini i-pads, and lots of books. In spite of this he seemed to find escaping to be the best puzzle and short of duct taping a lid over his enclosure would result in him finding a way to escape, usually to try and cause trouble in what he thought was a “cute” or “helpful” way. He would try and do your dishes, usually as an apology for throwing a tantrum, breaking most of them or using dangerous chemicals in cleaning. He would try and cook, usually setting something on fire as a result. He would draw all over books, using markers, and pens on books and ripping out pages to make hats and swords. Usually ones he would proudly give to you saying “Mommy I made this for you.” You found yourself having to hold back your anger in attempting to explain just how bad the things he was doing were, but he was incredibly petulant, refusing to admit mistakes and seeming to get stuck in a loop of typical responses.
He was a horrible prankster, or rather, his pranks were dangerous and destructive. He liked to set “traps” up that would oftentimes lead to nasty falls and deep cuts. He blubbered whenever he saw you get hurt, but would usually follow up with blaming you in childish petulant tones, rather than being sorry for setting up dangerous “pranks.”
There was even one instance in which he left you crying for a solid hour. He had somehow gotten a hold of your previous Chain bitties dust, and dumped it out the window, exclaiming proudly to himself. “Mwehehe! I’ve given him a proper funeral! You can rest easy Sir Clementine!”
Perhaps that instant is when you’d truly gotten fed up with him, as while you were crying into the empty urn he simply couldn't understand your grief and in response tried to be what he thought was “comforting.” 
“Mwe, Mommy don’t be sad! It was bad to keep him in a jar! He had to be free!”
You’d managed to hold your anger and grief at that moment, but your resistance to him couldn't last for long, as after weeks of torment he finally did something that caused you to snap.
“Mommy! Drugs are bad, I got rid of them for you! Mwehehe” He exclaimed, grinning at your stunned look. Proudly leaning over the toilet as he flushed your medication. At least five bottles of medication with birth control packet littering the floor. Four of which bottles contained your medicine for a deadly congenital condition.
Your face paled as you saw the pills going down the drain, dread at how you might not make it through the week and anger at his incredibly thoughtless action. Your mind stalled and the proud grin of the pygmy seared itself into your mind. It was as if all the torment he’d subjected you to in the past 4 weeks came flooding back to you, the forefront of which was your beloved Chain bitties dust. You nearly bashed him into the door, before an icy calm feeling flooded your mind and suddenly a chilling plan flew into your mind.
“Bud… Do you know what you just did?” You asked calmly, staring at the gigantic form of the pregnant bitty. He was undoubtedly ready to give birth any day now.
Bud grinned at you placing a fist proudly on his chest. “I, the great Bud! Have saved you from the evils of drugs! You don’t have to worry I will help you through this terrible time!” He stated, causing your eyebrow to twitch involuntary. Slowly inching forwards you shook your head.
“No Bud, what you did was very bad. Mommy needed those “drugs” you got rid of.” You said quietly, causing Bud to falter, but ultimately double down on his actions, completely sure that he could do no wrong.
“No! They were drugs, and all drugs are bad! That's what daddy used to say! But you don't have to worry momma! I’ll make sure they can’t hurt you anymore!” He exclaimed looking at you with stars in his eyes.
Rubbing your eyes you felt a headache coming on, as you walked forward to pick up the bottles and trash that Bud had dropped to the floor. Luckily it seemed like he was careless and had dropped enough pills that you could last for a few days while you sorted out getting more.
“My doctor gave me these Bud.” You said, watching a look of uncertainty cross Bud’s face. “Drugs given by a doctor aren’t bad. They’re actually very good. They’re medicine.” You explained, picking up the remaining pills on the floor and putting them in their corresponding bottle. “In fact four of these bottles had medicine that keep mommy healthy.”
“Mweh?” Bud said, looking very confused. “But daddy sai-”
“ENOUGH!” You shouted, slamming the bottles onto the bathroom counter with a resounding bang. Bud flinched at this, looking at you with fright.
“I can’t believe how selfish you are!” You bellowed, quickly grabbing Bud by the tail and whipping him in front of your face. He tried to talk over you but you were simply too overbearing.
“I’ve tolerated your behavior up until now! Mostly because of your clutch! BUT THIS IS UNACCEPTABLE!” You shouted, shaking Bud violently in your hands, causing him to cry out in pain.
“MOMMY YOU’RE HURTING ME!!!” He shouted, tears starting to form in his eyes, and a putrid stench emanating from him as a blue liquid dribbled down his tail running over your hand and his face on its journey to the floor.
“UGH!” You shouted, thoroughly disgusted that he would piss on you. Quickly flinging him into the toilet and shoving the lid shut. You planted your foot firmly on the toilet as you contorted yourself to wash your hands. Splashing, crying, and weak pushes came from under your foot as you ran the water. You sat glowering at the toilet once you were done.
You had so many calls to make and certainty weren't in the mood to deal with him so you quickly ran out of the bathroom and grabbed a roll of duct tape. Returning to the toilet only to see Bud gasping as he attempted to climb over the toilet seat onto the floor. 
Sneering you grabbed Bud’s skull pushing him right back into the toilet, holding the lid shut as you taped it closed. Preventing him from escaping. You heavily sat down on the seat afterwards, putting your face in your hands and screaming into them, pointedly ignoring the plea’s that came from the toilet.
It took awhile for you to calm down enough to think about what needed to be done. You couldn't let Bud’s, misbehavior continue for any longer. Hell you could barely look at him anymore. You had wanted to wait for a natural birth but it didn't look like that was possible anymore. Taking a deep breath you grabbed your phone, and the nearly empty bottles of medicine, first thing was first, you needed refills. Bud was one thing, but this, this was a matter of life and death for you.
----
A few phone calls, and a trip to the doctors brought you home with a week's supply of three of your pills. You would have to sort out the details of the fourth with your insurance company, and most likely would have to visit the pharmacy every day at noon to get your dosage for the day of the fourth in the meantime.
It took quite a while of mental preparation but eventually, you made your way back into the bathroom to finally let Bud out of the toilet. Taking a deep breath, you ripped the duct tape off the toilet, slowly opening the lid, to see and smell a sorry sight. 
Bud looked absolutely despondent, as he sat in the water of the toilet, a deep blue colour swirling all around him, as a few glops of feces floated around him too. He looked up at you with fear, and hope in his eyes, reaching out his hands to be picked up.
“Mommy why did you leave me!” He asked, causing you to roll your eyes, anger and disgust flashing in your eyes.
“Save it!” You stated, pulling out a box of floss from your medicine cabinet and holding a long thread over the toilet. “Hold on to this, we’re going to clean you up.” You sneered, watching Bud all but ignore the string as he struggled to leave the toilet, tears starting to run down his face. “Mommy up!” He demanded, holding his filthy digits out to you, he looked on the verge of a tantrum, one you wouldnt be tolerating.
“Where do you think you’re going?” You asked, glaring at the now confused bitty.
“We’re going to the bathtub right?” He said, looking even more confused, but even more insistently pushing his arms up in a gesture of “up.”
You laughed at him coldly. “HA! You think a bitty as awful as you get to have a nice hot bath? Fat chance!” You stated, wiggling the string to get his attention. “Hold onto the string.” You started again, before closing the lid of the toilet again, and pushing the flush valve.
“MOMMY!” Bud cried out alarmed and frightened by the sudden action. The string suddenly pulled tight against your hand. “MOMMY HELP ME!” You heard again, as he strained against the lid.
“We’re cleaning up a piece of shit” You said coldly, all love and tolerance for this bitty having dissolved the moment he dumped your Chains ashes. “Maybe if we’re lucky it’ll be better once we’re done?”
“NO MOMMY! MO*Gasp* MMY! MO *gasp gurgle* MMY! MOOOO*gasp, gurgle*OOOOMMMY!*gurgle*” Bud cried desperately, frequently getting a mouthful of water as he strained to escape. He did manage to lift the lid and poke his head out desperately during the process, only to have his head shoved back in and you sit on the lid. His cries continued, even after about 5 flushes, before you finally let him out.
He wasn't much cleaner after the process, only shivering, and waterlogged, but a large portion of piss was washed away. He looked at you with a betrayed look. 
“Mommy why?” He asked pitifully as you reached down with a gloved hand to pick him up.
“You know why.” You clipped out, grimacing as he started to snivel and desperately cling to your hand. 
“Mommy please I promise I’ll be good, I prooooomise! Don’t flush meeeeeeeee.” He wailed, causing you to fling him into the sink with a wet thud. He wailed harder, really you were more surprised that he hadn't given birth yet, you were trying so hard after all. It looked like you’d need more stimulus to force his labour.
“You’ve promised me that so many times, I don't believe you.” Really it wasn’t a lie, after every tantrum, mistake, and pissing he would always promise the same thing. You had never really believed him, he would never change on his own, but his pregnant state had prevented you from stressing him too much. Now it just didn't matter, the clutch was coming today whether he was ready or not, and after that, well if you just trained him instead of dusting him he would be incredibly lucky.
Bud looked shocked at your response, as if he’d never considered that you wouldn't forgive him. He didn't have a lot of responses though so he continued to snivel, sprinkling in pretty words to try and sway you.
“But I love you mommy! And I know you love me too! Please mommy forgive me!” He blubbered, not seeming to notice when you turned on the sink.
Ignoring his attempts, you got out a pair of scissors, cutting his clothes off, making extra sure to destroy his favorite blue neckerchief. Of course he wailed and flailed trying to get you to stop, but in the long run he only managed to get you to accidentally cut a piece of his tail off. 
“AHHHHHHH!!!!!” He screamed, much to your annoyance.
“Well it's your own damn fault for struggling so much!” You screamed, violently ripping the remains of his shredded clothes off his body. His wails didn't stop.
“MOMMY IT HURTS!!!!” You were getting so sick of his screams, so much so that instead of responding, you balled his remaining clothes up and stuck them in his wailing mouth. Earning a muffled scream.
His tears came back in full force, as he clutched at the dusting flesh of his tail, what looked like blood congealed over the cut, the bits that dripped off turning to dust. Grimacing at the sight you reached for a bottle of soap on the counter, generously lathering the baby blue’s engorged form. Then none to gently rubbed the soap into his wound, earning a long muffled scream from Bud. Really the relative silence was a blessing for you, furthermore you didn't even have to worry about him destroying something again because he was right in front of you.
He tried to push your hands away, but it wasn't good enough, so instead he tried to remove the cloth from his mouth. Clawing desperately at the piss soaked clothes, gagging noises coming from his form. Just as he was about to wrench the cloth free however, you savagely shoved him under the ice cold water that had finally reached a high enough point in the sink. You held him there for a good while watching as he flailed desperately against your hand. Bringing him back up you were amused at his attempts to cough, watching him choke against the cloth instead. You waited for the moment just before he caught his breath to shove him back under. Making sure that all of the soap was off of him before bringing him back up again.
His heaves and cries, gave way to more shudders, as you finally saw your desired effect. His clutch was coming.
Grinning wildly to yourself you gripped him around his torso, holding him up to your face.
“It's about damn time, I can't believe you made me wait so long for this.” You stated, quickly wrapping him up in a towel and shuffling him out to the pre-prepared birthing room you’d made just for him. The change in demeanor was quite shocking, and Bud was thrown for a loop when you suddenly started cradling him and cooing about how good he was.
“Awww let me take that out for you.” You stated in the kindest voice you could choke out, restraining yourself from torturing the little shit more. You might have needed to stress him out to get him to go into labor, but now, now you needed him less stressed. You gently removed the cloth from his mouth, throwing the bundle into the trash and gently stroking the pygmies back as shudders wracked through his body.
“Mommy? Mommy it hurts? Did you do this?” He asked, warily looking at you, as you set him down in a soft nest of blankets he himself had prepared during his nesting phase.
“Sweety you’re giving birth! You’re gonna be a mother.” You said, mustering as much enthusiasm as you could. You sounded incredibly forced, but the stupid pygmy didnt notice, because instead of being angry, he grew excited eyes beginning to sparkle, the stupid thing had already forgotten the torture he’d suffered. You were astonished how quickly his demeanor changed, but pushed that thought aside when his body was wracked with more shudders. YOu let him slither deeper into the nest of blankets, letting out coo’s and praises as he slowly started pushing out the first of many eggs.
---
It took nearly a whole night for Bud to finish his birth, many times you needed to feed him monster candy to help heal some damage the larger eggs did on his body. The first clutch a bitty produced was never usually viable, so you were pleasantly surprised to find that most of his eggs were intact. Bud was fast asleep, curled around his staggering clutch of 36 eggs. You were even more surprised just how many eggs he’d yielded. Your previous brood mother’s record was 15, Bud’s clutch was nearly the maximum most Lamia’s were known for producing.
Alas your surprise could only stay for so long, and the searing hatred you felt for the lamia came back in full force. Staring disdainfully at Bud,  you started really debating the pro’s and cons of keeping such a troublesome bitty. You knew how profitable he was, but was he really worth it, could you really stand to look at him after what he’d done? What he’d done was similar to what edgies were known to do, but with edgies, you’d at least had the ability to “prepare.”
The answer eventually came out to no, and with that revelation you very quickly, very quietly moved all the viable eggs to an incubator, leaving about 6 deformed and cracked eggs in front of the bitty.
Eventually the pygmy stirred, looking in front of him, quickly becoming distressed as the sight of only 6 eggs, he started wailing again much to your annoyance, shouting out. “Mommy my eggs! My eggs are gone!”
Rolling your eyes you grabbed him by the tail, picking him up, then picking up one of the deformed eggs and making sure to wave it in front of his face. “You want your eggs so bad. Here.” You said, before shoving the deformed egg into his mouth. 
Shock and panic flashed across his face, as he tried to stop your hands, but you were too strong for him, and despite his resistance you eventually made him swallow it.
He choked and sobbed, trying to reach into his own mouth for the egg, but you didn't give him that long, as you grabbed another and repeated the process. He flailed harder, trying to bite you, and he even drew blood, but you really didn't care. Standing you held onto him in a crushing grip, breaking a rib or two in the process, searching around for a roll of duct tape, you eventually found one and sat back down next to the remaining eggs.
“You know I really should just feed them all to you.” You stated, watching the pygmy as he cried and begged. “NO MOMMY PLEASE! PLEASE DON’T KILL THEM!!! I LOVE YOU!!!” You narrowed your eyes at his pleas, before a cold smirk graced your lips. “But you said you wanted your eggs… Could it be that you want to give birth again?” You chuckled not letting him respond, before you taped him down, making sure to have his limbs spread out and tail held firmly still. 
He wailed more. “Mommy I don’t like this, please let me go! I have to find my eggs!”
“Don’t worry Bud I’m giving you your eggs.” You stated, before picking up one of the remaining 4 deformed eggs and shoving it slowly, painfulling, back into Bud’s cloaca.
His screams were incredibly loud, louder than any he’d done before, he tried very hard to struggle, but with the duct tape holding him in place he couldn't resist. The egg ended up breaking and leaving a goopy mess all over the place, causing you to frown and chide Bud. “That's no good sweetie, your struggling broke it. We’ll have to try again.”
“NOOOOOOOOOOO!!!” He screamed, as you started to push another egg up his cloaca, this one did manage to go in, but the shivers wracking the bitties body didn't spell anything good, the edges of his cloaca were beginning to dust, goop and shell bits leaked from the orifice. Bud had stopped communicating, only sobbing uncontrollable. You didn’t stop though, you grabbed another egg and repeated the process, becoming a little satisfied with yourself when it didn't break once inside.
There was one more egg left and you planned to do the same thing with it, but first.
“Do you know why this is happening?” You asked, watching as Bud shivered and stared at you with tear filled sockets. He shook his head. “N-n-n-n-nnnooooooooo!” He shouted.
“I don't know why you would do this to me mommy! I love you! You love me too!” He stammered, asserting the last bit with such certainty that it made your stomach roll. 
“Idiot, I don’t love you, I just wanted your clutch.” You stated, before carefully shoving the last egg into his cloaca. You managed to firmly fit it in there, before grabbing more duct tape and covering his cloaca. After a moment of just watching him squirm and struggle to push the eggs out again, you firmly grabbed his torso, and violently ripped him up from the floor.
The duct tape was firm enough on the ground that it kept his arms and tail on the ground as you ripped upwards, detaching his torso and head from his arms and tail. Immediately he burst into dust, a few bits of egg shell remaining in the mess.
Staring down at the mess you made, you wrly thought to yourself. 
“I suppose I’ll just have to tell your old family you died giving birth.”
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proxylynn · 5 years
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Underfell: File Name not Edgy Enough #16
Chapter 16: Surge WARNING: I WANT NO RESPONSIBILITY OVER SPOILING THINGS FOR OTHERS. THAT BEING SAID, THIS IS HOW FILE NAME NOT FOUND WOULD FUNCTION IN THE AU OF UNDERFELL. BEFORE YOU READ THIS, UNLIKE THE NICE TIME OF UNDERTALE, THIS WORLD IS KILL OR BE KILLED. THIS STORY WILL BE GRAPHIC, GORY, USE SWEARS LIKE NOBODY'S BUSINESS, AND DEAL WITH SENSITIVE SUBJECT MATTERS. FOR EXAMPLE, THOSE OF YOU WHO HAVE READ THE FILE NAME RELOCATED SPOOF WILL KNOW HOW I PICTURE THIS VERSION OF LYNSIE COMING TO THE UNDERGROUND. IT IS NOT AN ACCIDENT. IT IS NOT BECAUSE OF SOMETHING DUMB. IT IS BECAUSE SHE CHOOSES TO END HER LIFE. SO TAKE THIS WITH A GRAIN OF SALT. I MADE IT BECAUSE I NEEDED TO LET SOME OF THIS EDGINESS OUT OF MYSELF. WHICH I GUESS MAKES UNDERFELL LYNSIE EVEN MORE TRUE TO WHO I REALLY AM. ANYWAY, ENJOY. ^_^ ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------ Another day, another start to a hopefully non-resetting timeline. At least, that's what Sans mumbled to himself as he woke up uncharacteristically early in the middle of the night. No nightmare this time, just randomly woke up and now finding it annoyingly difficult to zonk out again. He tossed and turned, moving all over the mattress to find that sweet sleeping spot, but nothing was working. Damn random insomnia. Can't a guy get a decent night's rest? Maybe he could kill time till passed out from boredom. He could try the books again, but at the risk of learning things that would make him want to drink bleach, he gave that idea a hard pass. What time even is it? Looking at his phone showed it was too late to go out but too early to start getting ready for work. Argh...Well...There is always the backup idea. It had been so long since he last tried it. What if he made too much noise? Papyrus almost barged in because he thought Sans was hurt or under a surprise attack. Fuck it. It's his room. He can have some "personal alone" time if he wants. Using a bit of magic to lock the door and seal it with a couple bones should allow for some decent privacy. Now to make himself cozy...Won't be needing his clothes for this bit fun. Besides, they'd only get dirty if they stay on and the last thing he wants is Papyrus asking what the weird stains are from. So after stripping down to bare bones and covering up in his messed up bed sheet, Sans stared up that the nothingness of his darkened room's ceiling only to realize something. "what do i even fantasize about?" It had been so long and nothing really got his soul glowing like that in forever. Hard to really find the time to get turned on when a human kid runs around cutting off heads and shit. But he's a normal monster man, he can get creative if he really tried, he's just need something to start at. Think...What makes him feel good? Jokes are a thing. Who can he think about that tells him jokes and likes his? Toriel is an option. Not like it's not too weird. Sure, she's married and royalty, but she gave that stuff so it's not like he's jerking off to a hardcore committed woman. Though he does have one issue...He's never actually seen Toriel. At his best guess, she looks like a female Asgore. The idea made him shudder. But again, it's just a starting point till something better forms in his skull. So with that in mind, he shut his eyes and let his hands begin to roam over his bones. "mmmm...damn it's been so long i forgot how good this could feel...mmmm...maybe...maybe now is good enough..." So, with the power of imagination and removing the maleness from his picture of the King, this version of Toriel pops into his head. She slowly approaches him on the bed, one hand softly rests on his ribcage as the other holds his jaw and rubs small circles with her thumb. "*coos* oh yeah...mmmmmm...this will work just fine..." She leans down and whispers to him. Why did the skeleton play with himself? His cheekbones began to color. "oooh...tell me why...please...?" Because he had no body. A soft moan turned into a small chuckle. "come on...you can do better than that. give me something raunchy." Have you ever known me for telling, as you put it, raunchy puns? "uh...not really." Then how am I to do so? "um...because i want it. aren't ya supposed to just do what i want because i'm making you up?" Fine, be that way. Force me to just be your little fantasy. You are no different from that fool, Asgore. "whoa, where the fuck is that coming from?" You tell me. After all, am I not your dream fantasy? "hell no." Then what is it that you do want, Sans? "for starters, you can go away." With a huff, the mental image of Toriel blows away. "sheesh...crazy bitch. what i want is someone that can make me laugh and isn't shy about how they do it. someone that knows a thing or two about how to treat a guy right. someone..." Need some help, Sansy-boy? That made his sockets widen and his spine shiver. "nope! nope! not happening. not going to think about her. nope. big fucking nope." Wow, not even gonna give me a chance? You gave Nanny a shot and she's married, to the King no less. He covers his earholes with his hands. "la la la, i can't hear you, la la la, i'm not listening, la la la..." Sans... Maybe it was just his imagination acting out, maybe it was just the way the sheets settled after he moved, but for whatever the reason, he felt something touch his leg and he swore the human was there. At least let me try. It's the least I can do after you helped me. Eerily he could honestly picture that being something she'd say. "no funny stuff?" Depends. What is your scope of 'funny stuff'? "just don't wig out on me like the first attempt did." Dude, it's me. You know me. When I wanna help, I do it. "i guess you're not wrong there." Plus I'm in your head, so whatever you want goes. That made him sit up. "wait...then why did she go all nuts if you're the same thing?" Simple, because she is like that. Remember when Paps told her he hurt me? She was gonna bring hellfire to us all had we not calmed her down. It's not her fault really. She's been in the Ruins for so long all by herself. She's just lonely and the lack of people make her social skills kind of suck. You can forgive her, can't you? His imagination had her kneeling beside him and again he could feel her hand timidly on him. As much as he hated it, so far, she wasn't not doing it for him. Maybe he could use this and switch her out later. "*sigh* fine." He plots back down on the pillow and points into the darkness. "but the second you fuck this up, real you is going to pay for it." She snickers and moves a bit closer. I figured as much. So...What would you like me to do first? He gave it some thought as his sockets closed again. "touch me." Where? "anywhere. i don't fucking care." Chill, man. I've never done this before. I don't want to piss you off or hurt you. "ugh...just...feel around. i'll let ya know how you're doing." At least this one was pretty damn accurate with how she was in real life. Once more he let his hands skim along his bones and after a bit, it didn't really feel like it was him doing it. "mmmm...okay, doing good..." Mind if I try something? She moves and now he pictures her kneeling behind him with his skull resting on her lap. How's that? Cozy? "not bad. mmmm...tell me a joke..." A naughty one? "heh...yeah. give me a really good one." Very well...What's the hardest bone a skeleton has? "mmmm...i dunno, what?" I'll tell you after we bone~. He both moaned and cringed at the joke. You're uncomfortable, aren't you? "just...not really wanting to do this with you. no offense." None taken. Can't say I blame you. I mean, I did try to kill you. "come on, that wasn't you. that damn black soul was the one that wanted me dead. at most, you want to hug me. and...sometimes...it's okay to do so." Really? "don't get hung up on it." Yes, sorry. Heh...Thank you though. But...um...I think I know how to fix it so it's less weird. "how?" You remember the image you saw in that anatomy book, right? Of the human skeleton? A heavy shudder leaves him and slowly the human starts phasing out from exactly looking human to more of an eye-pleasing sight. At least to him anyway. Gone was her skin, hair, and anything fleshy. Leaving just her form in bone. Is this better for you, Sans? It still had her voice, but that wasn't the part he was currently mentally staring at like a horny teenager. "oooooh...so much better. mmmm...tell me another joke..." What instrument do skeletons play during sex? "*moan* shit...mmmm...tell me...tell me it slow..." A tromboner. That time it was getting to him. The fantasy playing out of her as a skeleton, telling him dirty puns and feeling on his bones was starting to make his magic flair in power. And the longer he delved deeper into this enjoyable scene, the more his soul began to emerge from his chest. For non-typical anatomical monsters like Sans, the soul is more than just the core of their life, it also is a handy reproductive tool. Monsters like him, that don't really have natural reproductive organs, still need to procreate to keep their line going. So that's where the soul comes in. When such a monster seeks to make a child their soul will link with that of their partner and the mingling will act as normal coitus would. One partner acts as the giver of the genetics while the other is the receiver and will be the one to conceive the offspring. That's not to say, much like normal genitalia, the soul can't be played with for one's own benefit. Even the more normal monsters will use their soul in a similar manner. However, in this world, finding someone you can trust in intimacy with your quite literal life is not an easy thing to do. Coupling is rare, family units even rarer, and children the rarest of all. So a little self-indulgence isn't all that unheard of in the Underground. Doing this involves, well, rubbing the soul rather intimately. Sans...You really are one hunk of bone. Dare I say...You're a bony builder that can lift a skele-ton. "*groan* don't get all corny on me now...mmmmmm...i'm getting so close..." Sorry. Just thought I'd be a little sweet on you is all. But if you really want me to keep going... "ffffuck...*moan* keep going...please, keep going..." Heh, I didn't take you for the begging type. "*groan* don't tease me, kitten..." Oh, this is purrfect. Just pawsome. Your moans are meowsic to my ears. The things I plan to do to you...Sans...You'll whisker that I never stop~. "aaaah...yes...yes...mmmm~. touch my soul...oooooooh...fuck, please..." Those ghostly hands of hers were driving him mad. One danced its fingers along the length of his spine while the other tickled his ribs and would teasingly touch his soul ever so softly. If only this was real. If she was really here and treating him like this he'd have himself a great fucking time. In fact...He quickly turns over and moves the pillow to be under him, in his fantasy however it's her skeleton. Sans? "no more teasing, kitten. it's time to make you purr." In a motion akin to normal pelvic thrusting in traditional sex only reversed, Sans embraces the pillow tightly so that it presses against his soul and he rocks his chest in a steady yet heated rhythm. The pillow being a soft and slightly warm presence is a very convincing substitute for his mind to let his needs enjoy as he grinds into it. And as such, the fantasy goes with it. Oooh...Sans~. "yeah...*grunt* say my name, kitten...moan for me..." Aaah...Sans...Oh, Sans~. "good girl...*moan* gonna...gonna give it to ya good for that..." Is that a promise~? "you're damn right it is...*hard grunt* fuuuuck...this feels so gooooood..." The more she responded, the closer he came. It wasn't till after some pretty sultry dirty talk and several minutes of rapid thrusting did his soul begin to surge with the sense of release coming soon. Physically, the soul will also alert its owner of such pleasure by brightly glowing and secreting concentrated magic that has the consistency of slime. This soul goo acts as a lubricant and sensation enhancer. The stronger the feeling during such intimacy, the more goo is made, hence why things can get rather messy. "oohh fuck...ooh ooh...sooo close...i-i'm...hhnng...hnnhanh...ahh...ah hhnnn...i-i'm gonna..." Aahnn...ahhhnn...Sans...oooooh...Fuck...yes...yes...Sans~! "uauhn ahhh...it's happening...hahn aaahhnn...i'm...ahhhh...!" With not much else of a warning, his soul throbs out its climax in a release that he's certain will stain completely through his pillow, but so worth it to have that surge of euphoria throughout his body. "ooohh...ooohhhh y-yeeaahhh...ahhhhnn...mmmmmm...i so needed that. *coos* you were amazing~." No voice replied back, the fantasy was over, and in that split second of realizing it, Sans felt sick. "holy shit...i just did that to her...*gag*" With his magic drained, things he did with it before faded away like the bones at his door, and he felt tired. But now wasn't the time. Donning his shorts, he made a quick rush the bathroom to hurl. As pleasing as it all was, the fact still remained he just masturbated his soul to a fantasy of the human. He felt disgusted, dirty, and gross overall. Hopefully, a long hot shower could wash this feeling off and drown out those nasty thoughts from his skull. He stood in the streams for a long time, watching as his magical essence slid down his form and swirled into the drain. "ugh...how did this happen? when did i become such a sick fuck? she's human for fuck's sake! pretending she's a skeleton doesn't stop her from being human! *heavy sigh* life...why do ya hate me?" The water is turned off moments later and, after drying off, he returns to his room now clean but still feeling like scum. The wet and dingy pillow is cast to the floor where he feels himself to belong, yet, fuck the floor if you have a bed. At least he was tired now. Maybe some sleep will do him some good. At least get thoughts of her out of his head. Besides...It's not like he or she has any feelings for each other. After that thing with Grillby, and that kiss, it's kind of obvious how those two are. Wait... "*weak* Sorry about that...I know you trusted me with your first kiss...but I don't think I can take care of it anymore..." Was that the thing that happened in the bar the other day? What the hell?! No one told him shit! Then that moment when he came to the bar and Grillby was acting funny... "Sans...Can you watch the bar for a moment?" The pieces began clicking together and the internal screaming started loudly. Grillby has the hots for the human! [Hours pass] Papyrus woke up to a rather odd morning. He could smell something cooking but he wasn't the one doing it. It couldn't have been the human, after her initial break-in, he secured the window and bolted the door. So this smell was cause for slight alarm. Only slightly because the maker was about to pay for breaking into his home. But what to use? The bone club? The bone saber? The bone and arrow? So many choices. Maybe the bone mace? It hasn't seen action in ages and it would be a shame to not let this poor soul known what true pain was like. Leaving his room with the weapon in hand like a ninja, Papyrus silently crept downstairs and noted the intruder was dumb enough to turn on the lights. This joke of an invader was as good as dead, given that the top of their shadow could be seen and gave away his exact location. Closer now...Just a bit closer and it will only take one blow to end this. *clang* "fuck! god, damn butter fingers..." The seer levels of confusing shock almost made Papyrus drop the weapon. Sans in the kitchen is nothing new. But cooking? Hell must have frozen over. He walked into the entryway. "SANS?" His voice spooked his brother who, apart from being just in his shorts, juggles to hold onto the pan he just collected from the ground. "papyrus! h-hey...i didn't wake ya, did i?" Not the smartest thing to do, waking a sleeping Papyrus. But now wasn't the case. "NO. I AWOKE BECAUSE OF THIS SICKENINGLY SWEET SMELL INVADED MY ROOM." "oh...uh...what's with the mace?" He glances at it a moment before putting it down. "I THOUGHT SOMEONE BROKE IN AND WAS DUMB ENOUGH TO STEAL OUR FOOD." "huh...sounds reasonable." Sans put the pan on the stove and Papyrus looks around. There are plastic bags on the floor and items he knows they didn't have earlier. "I SEE YOU DID SOME LATE NIGHT PILFERING OF YOUR OWN. WILL I BE GETTING AN ANNOYING CALL FROM THE RABBITS LATER?" "i put some gold on the counter. she can't bitch about it if most is paid for." "MOST?" "i'm not paying 300G for eggs! that's bullshit!" Papyrus merely nodded. "AGREED. WELL DONE, BROTHER." Sans starts stirring something in a large bowel and it made Papyrus curious. "DARE I ASK WHAT IT IS YOU ARE DOING AT THIS HOUR? ASIDE FROM SHOPLIFTING." "what does it look like? i'm making pancakes." "...WHY?" Sans huffs a few times through his nasal hole, clearly pissed off but trying to stay calm. "because...i woke up super early and can't sleep. i get hungry when i don't get enough sleep." That is true. "WHY NOT HAVE THE HUMAN MAKE YOU SOMETHING? IT'S ONE OF THE FEW THINGS SHE'S ACTUALLY DECENT AT." Sans's stirring gets a bit harsher and sloppy. "i don't need her help. i'm fine. i can do this." A not entirely false statement. Sans wasn't incompetent when it came to cooking, so long as he was hungry enough his laziness wouldn't have him half-ass things. But his laziness was king, so him passing on a chance to have someone else do the work for him was a sign that something wasn't right. "ARE YOU FEELING ALRIGHT?" "i'm fine." "YOUR BEHAVIOR SAYS OTHERWISE." "i said i'm fine!" "OKAY, FIRST OFF...DON'T YOU FUCKING YELL AT ME!" This is the part where Sans would shirk and apologize. But that's not the case. He stands his ground and glares back at his commanding younger brother. "AND SECOND, IF SOMETHING IS BOTHERING YOU, JUST SAY SO. DON'T TRY TO ACT LIKE NOTHING IS WRONG WHEN CLEARLY SOMETHING IS." "i'm fucking fine. just leave me alone." Papyrus growls with a stern face. "FINE. BE THAT WAY. IT'S NO SKIN OFF MY BONES." Checking the clock, Papyrus collected his weapon and headed for the front door. "where are you going?" Papyrus said nothing. "paps!" The door slamming was the reply he gave. If Sans wants to be a dick, then he can be a dick. He'll just give him the silent treatment. But now that he was fully awake, he might as well get the day started before work time. And that includes fetching the human so that she will make him something to eat. No way he was eating anything a grumpy Sans was bothering with. So he enters the shed and turns on the light, but it bursts almost instantly. Must remember to fix that later. Passing through the bars, he uses his eyes natural glow to find her body curled into a ball on the pet bed. He pokes her with the mace. "WAKE UP, HUMAN. YOU ARE REQUIRED TO MAKE SUITABLE SUBSTANCE FOR ME." She didn't move or make a sound. This didn't please him. "I SAID...WAKE UP!" He yelled, shaking the snow off the roof of the shed. But she remained still as stone. This only ticked him off further than he already was and he kicked side her. Yet again, after several hard kicks, she didn't move. Not even Sans could sleep this deeply. Kneeling down, he put a hand on her neck. He didn't know much about humans but he knows that they breathe. He checked for the feeling of her doing this. He couldn't feel it. That's not right. So he uncurls her body with a bit of difficulty as she was rather stiff in the cold. Strange marks, almost like hand prints, appeared on her wrists and forearms. He was close to checking for more but made still at the thumping soft colorful glow emanating just under her shirt. "HUMAN?" She wasn't dead, at least not yet. Her soul would be fully out if that were the case. As much as it would be benefiting to let her parish, this was not the allowed way he would take her soul. Time to do his one random good deed for the year. He scoops her body up over his shoulder and carries the girl back to the house, perhaps the warmth will do her some good. Once inside, he plops her body down on the couch and checks her breathing again. "pap...can you let me apologize without leaving again?" Papyrus didn't speak as he then entered the kitchen to find something. This now had Sans's attention. "bro?" "DID YOU HAPPEN TO GRAB ANY ELIXIR WHILE YOU WERE OUT?" "uh...no? why?" "SOMETHING IS NOT RIGHT WITH THE HUMAN. SHE'S NOT BREATHING." "...what?" Sans stopped his pancake making to see for himself. Papyrus finds an old medical kit in a cabinet. "what did you do?" Mixing a few random things in a small medical kit will have to do for now. "I FOUND HER LIKE THAT." He returns to the living room while shaking a vial of colored liquid to see Sans staring intently at the glow of her soul. Scoffing to make Sans move away, he props the human's head up and opens her mouth, pouring the vial's contents down her throat. Some slight rubbing on the sides of her neck induced swallowing and he let her be when done. "H-Hey...?" Great. Now the flower is awake. "What's going on?" Not wanting to double down on being generously nice, he ignores the flower and returns to the kitchen. Seems he'll have to cook for himself after all. But first, to clean up the shitty mess Sans made. Sans on his end wasn't sure what to make of things. Especially after his 'personal time' moment. Part of him was concerned for obvious reasons. While another part of him was trying to stab that worried side to death and hang it off a cliff. "Sans...?" He flinched at his name being said that softly. "Is she okay?" It's just the flower. Calm down. No one knows about what you did. "dunno..." Hesitantly, he put a hand on her forehead. She's bone cold. "damn. she's like ice." "Oh no, not again..." Sans looked at the flower funny. "again? this happened before?" Flowey nods. "This sometimes happens when she has the 'really bad' dreams." Judging by the talk he had with her that can mean anything. "care to be a bit more specific?" Flowey shakes his head. "She doesn't tell me about them She only tells me that the dreams weren't good ones." "*sigh* typical." She tells her brother nothing about it. God, she acted like him. Woman get out of his head! Ignoring the crap in his skull, he gives her a little looking over and that's when he sees them. The marks. Those same marks she showed him before. She was with Gaster now. This got him curious about her soul, knowing how Gaster was with his fascination with the damn things. "Hey, leave her alone." Putting out everything else from his mind except her soul, Sans pulls down her shirt's collar to get a better look. "W-What are you doing, Smiley Trashbag?! Stop being a pervert!" He couldn't hear Flowey at this point. The soul had his attention. Part of it just breached the surface of her chest and the colors...there were so many and the way they swirled...mesmerizing. But that spell couldn't take full effect, not with that show of black among the bright colors and those large hand marks surrounding it like a cage. "*mutters* the hell are ya doing, g?" "SANS! GET YOUR ASS IN HERE!" That he heard. "keep an eye on her, weed." It was an order. One that didn't have to be said twice as he went to his brother in the kitchen. "yeah?" "*SIGH* I'M ONLY GOING TO ASK THIS ONE MORE TIME...WHAT WAS WRONG WITH YOU EARLIER?" Maybe if he words this right it won't be so awkward. "okay...let's say i have this friend, right?" "THAT NARROWS IT DOWN A LOT." "dick." "JUST TELL ME ALREADY." "again...i have this friend. and this friend, who shall remain nameless, i think has gotten himself into something i think is wrong." Now Papyrus was interested. "SUCH AS?" Sans rubs the back of his skull nervously. "i...i think he has feelings for someone. someone that no one would approve of." "AND WHY DO YOU THINK THAT? IS THIS PERSON A COMPLETE SACK OF SHIT AND NOT WORTHY OF THIS 'FRIEND'?" Now the hard part of wording this. "no...it's, uh...quite the opposite actually. they get along really well." "THEN WHAT'S THE PROBLEM?" "um...ya know how cats and dogs don't get along? like, they're natural enemies and junk." "YEAH?" "well...this friend and the person they like are technically enemies. but they seem to like each other anyway even though i'm certain all the underground would preform mob justice on them if they came out as a thing." "REALLY? THAT BAD?" "oh yeah." "AND THIS BUGS YOU WHY?" "because!" Sans rubs his face to calm down. "*huff* because...i don't want my friend to get hurt." Papyrus cocks his brow. "BUT THIS ISSUE DOESN'T REALLY EFFECTS YOU TECHNICALLY. JUST, FOR SOME REASON, EMOTIONALLY IS CAUSING YOU DISTRESS." "uh...i guess?" "THEN THE ANSWER IS CLEAR." "r-really?" "YES. YOU HAVE TWO OPTIONS. YOU CAN EITHER IGNORE THIS ISSUE AND ALLOW YOUR 'FRIEND' TO PURSUE THEIR 'OTHER PERSON'..." "yeah...not gonna let that happen." "OR...YOU DO WHAT YOU MUST TO BREAK THEM UP SO THAT ALL HOPE OF THEM GETTING TOGETHER CRASHES AND BURNS MORE POWERFULLY THAN A TSUNDERPLANE THAT LOST ITS SENPAI." That's really bad. "that would make me a humongous asshole if i did that." "THEN FOREVER SUFFER IN INDECISIVE SILENCE." "...that's not helpful at all." "SO SAYS YOU." Papyrus returns to his cooking and Sans groans with irritating annoyance. "*gasps and coughing*" The sudden sound had them peeking out into the living room where the human was found on the floor now and convulsing violently as the flower pathetically tries to restrain her movements with vines. Papyrus is the one that puts an end to this display with a bit of the old blue magic and holds her in the air by her soul till her flailing ceases. "CALM YOURSELF, HUMAN." The look on her face was one most recognize. Pain. It was etched into her eyes. As if something awful happened during the night. Her hands kept flexing in these claw type motions that had a stiff recoil. It's sort of like she was thawing out from being frozen. Odder still was her constant stare forward. "*shaky* I...I'm okay..." "ya sure?" She nods and Papyrus turns his magic off, letting her drop to her feet. Now under her own control, she crosses her arms over her chest like the folded wings of a gargoyle and shivers harshly. "*shaky* Can I trouble you for something warm please?" Her eyes kept forward, not looking at the brothers as she made the request. Papyrus, whether or not he was going to do this, returns to his cooking. Sans, on the other hand, approached her with caution. "kiddo?" "*shaky* H-Howdy..." "do ya need a moment?" She nods and he tries not to imagine if anything in his fantasy would've also given her such a reaction. "*shaky* Sans..." He both wished she would look at him and yet keep not doing so at the same time. "yeah?" Her eyes made a slight glance his way but looked at the floor. "*shaky* I...I need to talk to you later." Maybe this could work in his advantage. Talking with Grillby about this would be super awkward. "sure. i kinda got to talk to you later too." She shivers a bit more. "*shaky* Fuck...I hate the cold..." "probably be a smart move to take a hot bath. pap isn't likely to..." Papyrus walks past his brother with a steaming mug that he shoves at her. "DRINK." She looks at the mug in surprise. "DO NOT BE THIS SLOW, I'M NOT IN THE MOOD." She takes the mug with a hiss, burning her hands till she can get a proper hold. "*shaky* Thank you...um...What is it?" "WATER. NOW DRINK." "you boiled water?" "OF COURSE NOT. THAT WOULD BE TOO SLOW. I USED THE MICROWAVE." Sans shakes his head as the human moves to the couch, sits down, blows into the mug, and drinks. "*soft sigh* Much better...And here I thought you wanted me dead." Papyrus sneers. "DO NOT TAKE THIS AS A SHOW OF GOOD FAITH. I AM MERELY MAKING SURE MY PET DOESN'T MEET A STUPID END. I'D BE A POOR MASTER IF I LET SOMETHING AS STUPID AS THE COLD KILL YOU." This is the part where she'd retort with something witty, mocking, condescending, or just a biting comment. But no. All she does is smile and continue drinking. That earned her a few odd looks. "What? Is something wrong?" "ARE YOU NOT GOING TO FIGHT BACK?" "To what?" "I'M DEMEANING YOU, PET." She shrugs. "Eh, go ahead. If it makes you happy, then I'm okay with it." The odd looks only get stronger and Papyrus pulls Sans into the kitchen with him. "SANS, SOMETHING IS INCREDIBLY WRONG HERE. THAT IS NOT THE SAME HUMAN." "i don't know. looks like it's her." "CUT THE CRAP, SANS. CLEARLY, SHE'S DEPLOYING SOME SORT OF TACTIC. TRYING TO LULL US INTO A FALSE SENSE OF SECURITY BY BEING AGREEABLE AND PLEASANT." "for what reason would she have to do that for? if she was really that wicked, don't ya think she'd have tried to kill us ages ago?" "IT'S CALLED PICKING YOUR BATTLES. SHE'S JUST WAITING FOR THE RIGHT TIME TO STRIKE." "so sparing the dogs and not raising her LV is all part of the sinister plan?" "CLEARLY. JUST LOOK AT HER..." Papyrus sneaks a look into the living room. The human smiles in peace, finishing the water and going over to the flower to show it affection. "GENIUS...I'VE UNDERESTIMATED THE CUNNING OF THIS GIRL." Sans rolls his eyes. "or, and this might sound crazy...she might actually be an okay person." "THAT'S JUST WHAT SHE WANTS YOU TO THINK. CLEVER BITCH. MUST BE A TRAIT ALL FEMALES HAVE. MONSTER AND HUMAN." "speaking of monster bitches, we need to start getting ready for work. unless ya actually like hearing undyne screech for four hours." Papyrus glared at the thought. "DAMN WOMEN. WHY MUST SOMEONE AS GREAT AS MYSELF BE BOTHERED BY SUCH LOWLY SOULS?" Sans shrugged and teleported to his room, leaving Papyrus to walk upstairs to his chambers but first... "HUMAN..." "Yes, Papyrus?" "GO TO THE KITCHEN AND FINISH COOKING WHAT I STARTED." She salutes and does as told, making him glare. He doesn't buy this act for a second. No one pulls the wool over the eyes of the great and terrible Papyrus! [About half an hour later at Grillby's] "Grillby!" I'm willing to admit my lack of subtlety in being happy to see the fire bartender is childish as hell as long as no one judges me on my super non-normal greeting of pulling the guy over the bar and hugging his chest like I've not seen him in years. Not that he complains. He's a bit more confused if anything. "Heh...Nice to see you too, pussycat." Grillby pats my head as Papyrus snarls and I shyly release the poor guy to return to standing by Sans. "Gentlemen." "sup, grillz." "GRILLBY." Grillby smirks and fixes his glasses. "So, Papyrus...Did you think about my offer?" Papyrus folds his arms. "I MAY HAVE GIVEN IT THE FAINTEST OF THOUGHT." "And?" Papyrus looks at me and I try to be my regular self, but I'm too fucking happy because Grillby's alive! "I WILL AGREE TO THIS RIDICULOUS IDEA ONLY AFTER A WEEK'S TRAIL. IF SHE FAILS TO PREFORM TO MY LIKING, THEN NO DEAL." Grillby cocks his head. "Oh? And how would you judge this?" "SANS WILL REPORT ON HER." "what?!" Sans is not thrilled about doing more work. "Sounds fair to me. He is here often enough to see her progress." "don't i get a say in this?" "NO." "this is bullcrap!" I give a small tug on Sans's sleeve to get his snarling attention. "what?" I lean close to his skull and for a second I thought he trembled. "*whisper* No worries, dude. I got you." "the hell does that mean?" "*whisper* Half of whatever I make goes to paying off your tab." I pull back to see the shocked look come to his face. "for real? you'd really do that?" "It's what good buddies do. You help me and I help you. Sound good?" I offer my hand for him to shake and he gives me this look of uncomfortable uncertainty. "You okay there?" He eyes me before looking away and ignores my gesture. "whatever." Maybe he's just in a bad mood or staying in character of being a dick to me. I know I hide how I feel a lot. But I'm disappointed that this buddy thing we have is always a push and shove deal. "WHEN WILL THIS TRAIL PERIOD START? I HATE HAVING MY TIME WASTED." "She can start now if you want. Though the uniform will take a little longer." My ears perk at that. "Uniform?" Grillby smirks. "I'm going to need your measurements, pussycat. Unless, of course, you want me to do that for you~." I get flustered at his tease. "she'll get them for ya later. don't be weird about it." Grillby and I both look at Sans's defensiveness oddly, but you know, say nothing about it. "COME, SANS. AND YOU..." Papyrus eyes me. "I'M ON TO YOU." I tilt my head in confusion as the brothers leave. "They seemed to be in a good mood." Grillby comments and I shrug. "I have no clue what any of that was about." "So...about those measurements...?" I sigh. "What did I say about being creepy?" He puts his hands up in a playfully defensive way. "I know, and I'm trying to be 'that guy'. I'm asking as your boss, not your friend. You can size yourself in the back if needed." I wave dismissively at the suggestion. "Whatever it is, I wear large to extra large. I'm not big, but I like the free space. Makes me feel comfy." "How cute..." "What?" "Well, for one, you don't know how to fit yourself. And two, you think I'm giving you a choice." I'm suddenly getting flashbacks to when I first met Grillby. The man has charm, no doubt there, but he is intimating and forceful if needed. "Now, be a good girl and go through that door. I'll be with you shortly." "Yes, sir." Wow...That felt weird to say after being all chummy with the guy. I walk around the bar, past the poker table, and make it to the only door that won't have me going out into the snow. Above it is a small sign that reads "FIRE EXIT". I feel that's a joke. "Go on. It's not locked." I look back at Grillby and there's this almost impatient gleam in his glasses. It makes me shiver as I enter this door. Though the feeling chilling down my spine both stays and goes once I'm on the other side...It's his house. I'm in his house. The door behind me is the only exit and I'm in his fucking house! "Shhhit..." Quick! Brain! Think of something! What do I do to not piss off the man who's got me in his house?! But I got nothing. Zip. Zero. Zilch. My head draws a blank. All I really do is just move a little bit further inside so that he doesn't collide with me when he enters. From this small entryway, I can see his home is the reverse of the skeleton home. His upstairs living space isn't that large, the living room with its comfy looking sofa and kitchen are nearly joined, separated by an island counter with bar stools in front of it. A stairwell leading down must be where his more private rooms are. Make sense in a way, even if snow is covering the ground, under the ground can have temperatures that are far more enjoyable. I bet it's really warm down there. Kind of is warm right now. Really warm. The hell is...? "Boo!" I yelp, flying a good five feet onto the floor and gripping my chest in panic. All the while Grillby smugly grins at me. "My, aren't you jumpy. You act as though you expect something bad to happen." I blink a few times and hold my breath to calm my heart down. He approaches and offers his hand. "No hard feelings, right pussycat?" My hand trembles to take his. "No cool, Grillby. Very not cool." He pouts and pulls me up onto my feet. "Are you frightened of me?" I shake my head a bit too quickly. "It's not nice to lie." I play with my hands a little. "I don't mean to be." He sighs and puts a hand on my head. "I don't mean to scare you. I just take my work very seriously. You are now part of that and therefore..." "I understand...sir." "Don't call me that." His tone is calm yet has this harsh crackle that makes me flinch. He notices and lets that hand slide down to rest around my shoulders. "Lynsie? Are you alright?" "I don't know anymore." He rubs my shoulder and I try to think straight. "Do you want to talk?" "Maybe." "Okay...Go into the living. I'll come back with what I need and you can tell me what's troubling you while we do this. How does that sound?" I sniffle a little. "Sounds fine." He taps my shoulder and I walk away into the living room as he himself goes downstairs. When I know he can't see me I wipe my eyes. Something is wrong. I can feel all these nerves going off inside and my emotions are fluctuating. What's wrong with me? Is this what PMS is? Oh shit, when was my last period? What the hell is happening to me?! This is your fault, stupid soul. If it's not the black one trying to kill people than it's the pink one making me all hormonal and shit. I can hear his steps coming up the stairs and I try to settle down before he sees the mental train wreck showing on my face. When he's back on my level, he has a notepad with a pen in one hand and the measuring tape of a tailor in the other. "Are you ready?" It's okay. He's being professional. Just calm down. Calm the fuck down! "Y-Yeah." "Nervous?" I crack a weak smile. "Just a little." "I promise, I won't cross any lines." Am I capable of making a joke with a straight face right now? Here's hoping so. "So no fondling the side-boob this time?" He blushes for a moment, snickering lightly before smirking. "Not unless you want me to." Okay, this is at least normal. It's what we do. We make flirty jokes. Everything is fine. I am fine. "In your dreams, hot stuff." "At least you seem better. Now stand straight for me, pussycat." I do as requested and he begins to render me into numbers. Starting with the neck, he wraps the tape around my neck and has it resting on my shoulders, putting one finger between the tape to allow for some extra room. "So...Anything you want to talk about, dear?" "Well...I kind of want to say some things and yet...not." "Personal matters?" "Mostly." Next up is the chest, the measurement is taken as a circumference measurement around my chest at the widest point. Something that he enjoys as I blush. "I won't make you talk if you don't want to. But you may feel better if you got some of it off your chest." I groan loudly. "Oh my god, Sans has tainted you." "Heh...I saw an opportunity and I went with it." "By the way...Who's watching the bar while you do this?" "Big Mouth is in exchange for free food for an hour." "The clock is ticking while you do this, right?" "You know it." "Heheh...Clever boy." Now we have the waist, this measurement is taken as a circumference measurement around my waist just above the belly button. "Can I ask what this uniform will look like?" "And spoil the surprise? I think not. Although...I know it will be something no one will be able to take their eyes off of." "That both sounds awesome and foreboding at the same time." "Trust me, it'll have you rolling in gold." "Now it's really ominous." Another part that has me blushing is my seat, aka the ass. The seat measurement is taken as a circumference measurement around my butt at the widest part and I try not to squirm at the feel of his hands. "You okay, pussycat?" "You're doing that on propose." "Doing what?" "One, overusing that pet name that you know bugs me. And two..." I give him a playful wink. "Not asking for permission before you touch me." He bites his tongue and exhales slowly. "Close. You almost had me there. No point for you." "Dang. Thought I had an easy one there." He chuckles to himself. "What's so funny?" "Nothing really. Just thinking that you enjoy teasing me just as much as I do to you." He's not entirely wrong. "I can't lie, you are a fun playmate." "Same to you...Pussycat." The shirt length measurement is taken from the top of the shoulder, close to the mid-side of my neck, following my body down to the point where he wants the top to end. "This...This feels nice." "What does?" "Just talking with you. I always feel so comfortable around you. Well...until I don't." "Like earlier?" "Yeah." "Again, I didn't mean to make you uncomfortable." "I know. It's just..." I struggle to speak. There's so much I want to say to him. "Take your time, dear. There's no rush on what you want to say." When it comes to shoulder width think of a line going from the armpit straight upwards to the shoulder. He measures between those two points and holds the tape measure straight. "Grillby..." "Yeah?" "Have I...Whenever I was, you know, drunk...Did I...*flustered* Did I ever...kiss you?" He flinches in his writing on the notepad and his flames flash for a moment in his blush. "*nervous* Um...W-W-Why would you think that?" I can still hear his confession in my mind. "*weak* Sorry about that...I know you trusted me with your first kiss...but I don't think I can take care of it anymore..." And his nervousness is also a big ass clue. "I...I heard it from someone in the bar." His face starts to heat up and he looks away. "It...It might have happened...once. B-But nothing else happened, I swear!" Wow...I gave him my first kiss and I don't even remember it. That's...really sad. He's all messed up now and I keep quiet so he can regain his composure. He next measures my arm length, the sleeve length measurement is taken from the point of the shoulder and following my bent arm down to where he wants the sleeve to end. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to make this awkward." He doesn't say anything and I feel awful as he continues to work. The wrist measurement is taken as a circumference measurement around the wrist. The biceps measurement is taken as a circumference measurement around the biceps. The last one he does is my hip, doing the hip measurement is taken as a circumference measurement around the hips at the widest part. Though unlike with the other past measurements, he lingers close to me and I'm hesitant to say or do anything about it. "...Are you upset with me?" Okay, remember how to talk. He needs to know everything is fine. "Why would I be upset?" "Because...I didn't have the nerve to tell you myself." In another timeline, my friend, you did just that. "I don't care." He looks at me funny. "You don't?" "No. The part I care about is how far things went. And with it just being a kiss...It proves to me that you're someone I can trust fully. For a lesser soul would've taken advantage of that situation." His eyes soften and he leans his forehead on my own. "You can't be real." "I assure you..." I take his hands in mine, letting him drop the notepad and tape. "I am very real. And...I...I feel bad that I don't remember it." I can feel his heat getting stronger. "You do?" My face gets really red and I find it hard to keep looking him in the eyes. "Unless it was bad, then, I am super sorry about my shitty kissing skills." "N-No! No...I mean...It was nice." "It was?" Now he's the one trying to be sweet. "Well...Yeah. For an unexpected kiss, it wasn't bad. Not too long or too short, with just the right amount of care." Realizing what is coming out of his mouth has his face blushing big time. But now I'm curious. "Really? What did it feel like?" The words leave me before my brain can filter them. His eyes widen as his flames burn brighter. Though his normal cool self comes through with that playful smirk of his. "R-Really? I mean...If you're really curious about it, I wouldn't say no to doing a quick demonstration." If that dead timeline taught me anything, it's that he isn't joking and will do it if I say yes. I remember his kiss as he said his peace before death. It was so sad. I want to know how he feels when he isn't on his deathbed and has no tomorrow. So I take a deep breath and let his hands go to put them on his chest. "I'm okay with that." His hair of fire grows larger in excitement. "Are...Are you serious? No joke?" I nod. "I'm being very serious, Grillby." "And you have no issue with me being a monster?" Now I understand dream Grillby's frustration at the constant doubt when the intent is painfully clear. "If you have to ask then I don't want to know anymore." My hands begin to slip off him but they don't get to leave their perch on his chest. His hands clasp me by the shoulders and pull me into his smoldering kiss. The impact was rather abrupt, but the kiss itself is gentle and slightly timid feeling. My wide surprised eyes meet his burning ember orbs and the look they hold has mine slowly close. Most of that dream of him seems to be real. His face is as solid as his body looks and just from the feel of his mouth alone I know it must be very hot in there. He pulls back only a little bit, our faces still close enough that my nose still brushes against his fire. It kind of tickles. "So...How was it, Lynsie?" There is so much I want to say, yet can't find the words. "*coos* Whoa..." That will have to do. I mean, I did have a fire pun at the ready, but it's not really the right moment for it. My reaction has him getting the cutest look on his delighted face. "Glad you liked it." I can't help the smile on my face. "I like you, Grillby..." I give him a quick peck where is nose would be. "The kiss is just a bonus." His face is blank for a moment before he grins. "I think this is the start of an interesting work relationship." "Yeah...About that..." I can't get out of his grip, not that I'm trying, but I back up a bit so we're less likely to smooch again. "There's still a bit more 'personal' stuff I have to tell you about that I really don't want to affect our current situation." He titles his head. "How so?" I rub my cheeks trying to delude the red burning them. "Okay...Promise me that this never leaves this room. And I mean, all of this, is never spoken about." "Pussycat, give me some credit. As if I'd ever share the things you tell me." "I mean it." "Is it that one of them hurt you?" That had me for a moment before his words register in my head. "What?" "You're ignoring them, but that doesn't make them invisible to anyone else." He grabs one of my arms and holds it up, showing the bruises. "Did they do this? Papyrus I can believe, but I have doubts on Sans. But if they did this to you..." "They didn't. This is a whole different issue." "Don't defend your abuser." "I'm not defending shit. It's my problem, I can deal with it. Don't make this a big deal." "It is a big deal!" His grip harshens, burning my skin. "*wince* You're hurting me." He releases my arm with immediate regret. I hold my arm and rub the red mark. "Like I said...That's a different issue that I will deal with. Not you. Are we clear?" "Y-Yes." "The thing I want to tell you...I don't want it to bleed into this thing we got and influence anything. If something happens, fine, but not while this whole 'job' thing is going on." "How bad can it be for you to be so serious?" "Trust me, it's something big that even now I'm having trouble getting ready to say." "You're over thinking it. If you just relax..." "My soul surged because I dreamed of you!" It came blurting out rather fast, but after a moment or two, Grillby's eyes widen as his fire strengthens. "Wha...W-What?" I'm not about to repeat that. I let the flustered blush on my face speak for me. "So that...That thing the other day...?" I look away and nod, not noticing him biting his lower jaw. "And it was because...*deep crackling shudder* You dreamed of me?" That sound has my soul threatening to jump out so my head has me spew out words in distraction. "It just happened so randomly. Maybe what that guy said influenced my thoughts and you've been so good to me...Oh my god, this is so embarrassing. Why am I even telling you this like it won't affect things? Of course, it's going to affect things! I'm a freaking moron to think otherwise. I...I..." I get distracted by a sudden glow coming from Grillby that isn't part of his flames. This soft dull gray is on his chest, almost blending in with his clothing. Grillby sees my eyes staring curiously and when he follows this vision trail his reaction reminds me of when I had the surge the other day. He pulls away from me very sharply, covering his chest with this look of humiliation and fear, turning away from me. "Don't look at it!" I turn away feeling super uncomfortable. "I saw nothing!" I can hear him huffing and puffing, faint smoke plumes on the ceiling like a chimney burning logs. "Um...Do you...Do you want me to leave?" There's this steamy hiss that draws out of him. "*raspy* Give me...Give me a minute..." Don't say anything stupid, don't say anything stupid, don't say anything stupid, don't say anything stupid, don't say anything stupid, don't say anything stupid! "Did...Did I make you surge?" What did I just fucking say, you stupid git?! I regret so much once I asked that. Because suddenly he's breathing in my ear and his fire is intense. "*heated* It wouldn't be the first time...Lynsie..." So much internal screaming! I literally can't move. The only thing that I do, is let out this weak pitiful yelp because my body can not fathom what the fuck it is to do in this situation. I'm fairly certain a scan of my head would show a bunch of little people running around and screaming in panic. But then...he starts chuckling. "*lowly* Got you, pussycat..." It takes a bit for my messed up brain to put the pieces together, but when they do... "Did you...Did you just tease me?" "*huff* My point. So far...I'm winning for today." His breathing is still smoky. He may have teased me but he's still messed up. Let it go. Leave him be. "Heh...I'll try harder next time." I give a tiny glace over my shoulder to see his very heated colored face. The way the dark to light blue really highlights his purple fire. Wow, that's cute. "I'm gonna go make sure we still have a bar to work in. Will you be okay without me to tease for a bit?" He nods. "*puff* Use the time to get familiar with being behind the bar. I'll be there shortly. I...I need to make a phone call." "Will do. See you soon...boss." I snicker to myself as I take leave of his home for the attached bar, all the while feeling his eyes on me. "Hey look! The girl is still in one piece and not a pile of ash. Miracles do happen." Punk Hamster is starting early. Super. "Don't make me cut you off and force you to be sober for more than whatever time it takes for you to pass out at home. Because I'll come over there, little man." He grips his glass possessively. "You don't have the balls, woman." "No, but I do have tits. And I'm willing to bet my pair is larger than your nuts." I glare harshly and he tries to match it but can't. "*scoff* You're not worth it." "That's what I thought." One asshole took down a peg. Not bad for just starting this shift. "Yo, Big Mouth, you're relieved of duty. I got this." The big toothy plant monster turns my way. "What about my food?" "You'll get it. Grillby's coming back. He's just making a phone call." It moves to its usual spot as I go behind the bar. There's so much back here. How the hell am I to remember all this and what to do with it on top of mixing recipes? Damn it, Papyrus, I make one drink and you think I can handle all this? This is not the same as working the register at that pizza chain. There's beer, wine, liquor, cocktails, among other beverages such as mineral water and soft drinks. Some snack foods such as potato chips, mixed nuts, and peanuts. That's just the basic stuff without glossing over the kitchen's main food menu and the little add-ons that go with it all. Fuck my life now. "It looks scarier than it is..." Grillby returns from settling down and joins me. "But once you get a groove going and learn a few cheats, it gets really easy." "Dude, just warning you now, I am going to try my damnedest but there is no way I'm picking this up in a day." "Come now, pussycat, nothing is ever learned so quickly. Just be my shadow and learn from watching me. You can do that much, right?" "Ha ha, I get it. I shall become the sponge and hope to soak up some of your great skills." He pats my head. "Start with something simple to get a feel of things. Cut up those lemons and limes for me." "Alright. How many?" "Do about six of each, cut four into wedges and two into thin slices. I don't use them all that much. Only on Wednesdays, Thursdays, and Fridays." "Why those days?" "Those first two are when I do ladies night. And Friday is happy hour." "I've heard of those, but never understood what they were." I get to work as Grillby started to look stern again. And grumpy Grillby is not one I want to mess with. "Well...Ladies' night is a promotional event where female patrons pay less than male patrons for the cover charge or drinks. Happy hour is a marketing term for a period of time in which a venue offers discounts on alcoholic drinks, such as beer, wine, and cocktails. Free hors-d'oeuvres, appetizers, and discounted menu items are often served during happy hour." "Huh...The more you know. And after I cut these?" "There's not much to do that I haven't already got ready for. That and I've only been open for a little bit, so things are slow. But when you're done with that I'll go over a couple of the regular drinks that 90% of the time they'll order." "I think I already can handle one customer's usual with no problem." "Oh? And who would that be?" "Sans." I point to a line of mustard bottles near the icebox and he chuckles. "Yep. And knowing that, I think you'll do well here." I smile and focus on my cutting. "Grillby..." "Yes?" I don't look away from my knife work. "That stuff we talked about..." "I know. Workplace fun is for after hours. Our little game is on pause." Not exactly what I was going for, but that's okay I guess. But I can give him some leeway, I mean, I do want this fun we have to continue. And if something happens, like emotionally, that's fine too. I like Grillby. I can guess he likes me too by the few clues I've got from him. Who knows. It might be nice. "Sure. Glad we understand. After hours and break times." I glance at him and he looks at me flatly before smirking. "It's a deal, pussycat." "Oooooh~..." Punk Hamster is really testing my nerves. "Sounds like someone's getting lucky tonight~." "What did I tell you? I will take that glass and cram it up your..." Grillby's hand on my shoulder makes me pause. "Now now, pussycat, that's not how to treat a customer." Punk Hamster laughs mockingly until Grillby's gaze falls on him. "Let me show you how to properly deal with someone that isn't respecting establishment authority." Grillby approaches Punk Hamster, who looks like he's about to shit a brick, and slams his head onto the bar. He holds him down and leans to his ear, whispering something I can't hear. Though the look on Punk Hamster's face screams fear to me. When done, Grillby lifts him back up and pats his head a tad roughly like an old pal would do before turning back to me with that charming nonchalant grin of his. "So...Ready to learn some mixology, pussycat?" I'm a little unnerved but I need to learn that messing with fire can get you burned. Here goes nothing. "Uh...Sure. Teach away, oh master of the flame."
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