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dean-winchester-is-a-warrior · 2 months

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Bring Me Back

Summary: When a panic attack hits Y/N hard, the boys know just what to do.

Warnings/Explicit 18+: TW panic attacks, symptoms of panic attacks, fear and worry, brief discussion of therapy and medications.

Pairings: No romantic pairing. Jensen Ackles x teen!reader, Jared Padalecki x teen!reader

Word Count: 1,268

A/N: I got a request from the dear @kayyay1219

...Maybe if the reader is a teenager and she’s having a lot of panic attacks and she’s at work one day shooting Supernatural and Jared and Jensen walk in and she’s having a panic attack. Then they help her by calming her down, calling her sweet nicknames... ... If it’s not too late to request something in my request, can you have the reader have a huge panic attack to the point she gets sick and Jensen and Jared take care of her?

I so apologize that this request took me SO long to get out. But I hope you enjoy it anyway. ❤️

A/N 2: As always, this story is about a Jensen and Jared from a different part of the multiverse and doesn't reflect anything to do with their real life. This is a complete and utter work of fiction. 😊

The beautiful dividers below and at the bottom were created by @saradika

“Jensen, can I talk to you?” The make-up artist, Alicia, stuck her head into the wardrobe trailer where Jensen was laughing with Jacob, one of the set costumers as he shrugged into Dean’s green and brown flannel. He looked into the mirror and caught Alicia's eye.

“Sure, Al. I'll be there right away.”

But Alicia shook her head. “No, I think, I think you need to come now.”

Jensen turned quickly to face her. “What's wrong?”

“It's Y/N.”

Jensen didn’t say anything more, just walked briskly to the door. His long legs brought him to the hair and makeup trailer quickly. He took the stairs in one big step and pulled open the door.

Inside the trailer, Dani, their onset stylist, was standing over Y/N and patting her shoulder.

“It's okay, sweetie, it's okay.”

Jensen felt his heart leap at the scene in front of him. Y/N sat in the makeup chair, leaning back, her face was pale, a sheen of sweat covering her brow and tears streaming down her face. She was gasping, her breathing rapid and shallow. Her hands were locked onto the arms of the chair in a vice-like grip.

Jensen walked closer and she turned to look at him. “Jensen,” she panted, “Jensen, please, please help me. I’m…I think I’m dying. I can’t breathe.”

Dani continued to pat her shoulder and Y/N smacked her hand away. “Get off me!” She yelled, terror suffusing her face. She sat forward in the chair and kept trying to suck in enough air. She was rubbing her chest when suddenly she pitched further forward and threw up on the floor in front of the chair.

Looking back at Jensen, she pleaded with him again, her voice hoarse and desperate. “Jensen, please, something is wrong, really wrong this time, I know it.”

Jensen moved towards her and spoke to Alicia over his shoulder. “Grab a towel?” She quickly pulled down a small white hair towel from the shelves behind her and tossed it to him.

Dani stepped out of the way as Jensen stooped to wipe up the mess on the floor, before tossing it all into the sink. Dani had grabbed a bottle of water and passed it to Jensen and then moved away to wash out the towel and toss it in the laundry.

Jensen opened the bottle and then passed it to Y/N moving to stand in front of her chair. He got down on his haunches just as Jared ripped open the door and pushed inside.

“What’s happening? He asked, frantic worry on his face.

With the two giants now crowding the small trailer, Alicia grabbed Dani’s hand and pulled her towards the door. “We’ll wait outside. Let us know if you need anything.”

Jared waited for the women to leave before walking closer to his best friend and their young castmate.

“Another panic attack?” Jared asked, sadness replacing some of the worry.

Jensen nodded but Y/N was shaking her head. “No, no! It isn’t this time. This is real, I’m really gonna die.” She clutched at her chest and spoke in a rasp. “I can’t breathe.”

Y/N began to hyperventilate and Jensen took the water away from her; she was shaking too much to drink. “I’m gonna pass out. I’m not gonna wake up.”

Jensen reached forward and gently pried Y/N's fingers from where they clutched the padded arm of the chair. Then he scooped her up and carried her over to the small window at the back of the trailer. He opened it, letting a soft breeze roll in, bringing the fresh scent of grass and earth into the trailer. He pulled over a chair and sat under the window.

He looked at Jared and nodded towards the sink. “Get a wet cloth.”

“Yeah.” Jared said, knowing the drill as well as Jensen by now.

Jensen settled Y/N so she was comfortable in his lap. He held her close, but didn’t restrain her in any way. He knew it would get so much worse if she felt trapped. He just wanted her to feel safe. When Jared came back, he began washing her clammy face with the cold, wet cloth.

Jensen was breathing deeply. “Breathe for me, baby. Just in and out, in and out. Good girl.” He said as she tried to copy his deep breaths. Jensen looked into her eyes, pulling her frantic gaze to his. “Listen to my words, okay? What you're feeling, it’s not real; the panic, the feeling that you’re going to stop breathing, it’s only that, just a feeling. You are here, with us. Nothing is going to harm you, you have nothing to be afraid of, do you hear me?”

Y/N nodded disjointedly as she listened to Jensen’s familiar words. It wasn’t the first time he’d told her these things and she struggled to remember that he’d been right every other time; she fought to remind her brain that she was safe with Jensen and Jared right beside her.

Jensen began to talk to her about mundane, everyday things - his ride into set that morning, silly, funny things his kids had done over the weekend, things that made her let out little bursts of laughter and pulled her further back from the edge. Eventually she took her bottle of water back and began to sip at it.

Jared wet the cloth two or three more times, coming back to wipe her forehead and cheeks, as well as down her arms. He held the cold cloth to the pulse points in her wrists, and the sensation seemed to clear away most of the cobwebs that still crowded her mind. She began to take part in the conversation instead of just listening and occasionally laughing.

She slowly came back to herself, her breathing returning to normal and her temperature dropping. Her stomach stopped aching and her muscles relaxed. As Jared talked to her about the new puppy they had living at their place, Y/N felt the last of her panic fall away.

“You should come see him next weekend.”

She sat up in Jensen’s lap, slightly embarrassed now that everything felt normal again. “I’d like that.” She said to Jared. Then she shook her head. “I’m sorry guys, and I need to tell Dani I’m sorry too.”

“Uh uh.” Jensen said with a kiss to her forehead. “No apologies, remember? And Dani’s fine. She gets it, sweetheart. We all do. So no saying ‘I’m sorry.’ Okay?”

She nodded. “Okay, then I’ll just say thank you.”

Jared leaned in to give her a stubbly kiss on the cheek. “Anytime, kiddo. But you’re gonna talk to your therapist on Thursday right? Make sure you tell her you’ve had two panic attacks in the last two weeks. She may want to change the dosage of your meds, or increase your appointments with her for a little while, until you work through whatever has brought the attacks back on.”

Y/N nodded. “Yeah, I’ll talk to her about it.” She hugged Jensen first and then Jared, before she stood up. “I’m gonna go for a walk, wanna come?”

The boys stood up and each offered her an arm. She smiled as she slipped an arm into each of theirs. They all laughed as they tried to file out of the hair and makeup trailer without unlinking arms.

Y/N didn’t want to let go of the twin pillars who kept her standing, kept her protected, and just like their heroic characters, would always bring her back. Always.

Jensen RPF and Any/All Characters: @lyarr24 @lacilou @deans-spinster-witch @globetrotter28 @suckitands33 @akshi8278 @evznackles @jackles010378 @impala67rollingthroughtown @krazykelly @candy-coated-misery0731 @envyaurora95 @spnwoman @deans-baby-momma

Any/All Fics Regardless of Character or Fandom: @kazsrm67 @slut-for-evans-stan @sexyvixen7 @nancymcl @waywardcheshire

Everything Incl. Fan Edits: @k-slla @leigh70 @eevvvaa @kickingitwithkirk @foxyjwls007 @notinthislife50 @roseblue373 @mishkatelwarriorgoddess @avanatural @mrsjenniferwinchester @all-alone-he-turns-to-stone @deangirl92 @hobby27

#jensen ackles #jared padalecki #jensen x teen!reader #jared x teen!reader #platonic relationships #tw: panic attack

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myers-meadow · 2 years

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hello, you don't have to write this if you ate uncomfortable. But I was wondering if you might be up for writing a Grabber x reader, where the Grabber knows that the reader is a masochist and the reader denies it completely.

Hop you enjoy this one! You didn't specify whether you'd like smut, but that is what I wrote, since it's my favourite <3

This was great fun 💞😊 Feedback is very welcome, and if you enjoyed this, don't feel shy to reblog :). That helps a lot.

Requests are still open btw :)) Link to my writing masterlist.

Warnings: smut, 18 + content, knife play, blood play, masochism, he's a bit mean.

Divider by @/firefly-graphics.

He was inside again. It stung with the stretch of him, toes curled until they cramped.

“Ah, be gentle,” you bid him, but he shook his head, eyes crinkled with a laugh behind the mask.

“I don’t think you want me to,” was all he said, before tightening his grip on your shoulder. He always seemed to want more from you, or something you weren’t able to give – but for now, everything was perfect. He drove into you mercilessly, one hand keeping you still, the other dragging the tip of a knife down your chest. Each gasp, whine or moan would change the way it felt against the skin. Perhaps because of the vibrations, perhaps because he just wanted it so – but it was delicious. The sting of it made you clamp down on him, and he hissed as if he was the one in pain. The sound of his voice made you spiral higher. Each shallow breath made your head swim. Everything about him was overwhelming, and each sensation was crystal clear.

He continued, smearing the trickle of blood over your chest, deepening the sting. “You love this, don’t you? You love when I’m rough. You love to hurt for me.”

As soon as you shook your head, you sensed his frown. Instead of responding, he pushed two fingers in your mouth, pushing them past your teeth. They tasted of blood.

“Well,” he said, softly groaning as another clench sent shockwaves through you both, took his fingers out of your mouth, the pressure returned to your shoulder, “if you admit it, I’ll tell you all the things I like about you.”

Your response came a little late for his liking, and he slowed down, lifted the knife and twirled it in his hand. “Or I could just stop, if you’d prefer?”

Of course he knew you’d cave. He knew you needed this as desperately as he did, that the weight of him, the edge of danger all made you dizzy with something akin to love.

Before he stopped completely, you spoke up, voice shrill and out of breath, but it was enough. “I need you, I need you as you are.”

He continued his slow torture of your insides, cocking his head. “Hmm, what do you need, doll?”

Barely more than a whisper, but he heard you. “I need you to hurt me.”

That did it, and he let himself fall onto you, pushing your legs back. “You’re so perfect for me,” he mumbled, the sound echoed through the mask, his breathing loud in your ear, so close, so close. With the knife in hand, he pressed it against the spot you needed him most, slowly moving the handle against the bundle of nerves, your back arching up into him.

“God, no, too much…” and your eyes pressed closed with a sudden and overwhelming explosion of sparks.

He moaned deeply, “my sweetheart, you’re taking it so well. You feel so good.”

His hips stuttered in his own climax, but he stayed inside, letting his weight rest on you, almost suffocatingly, but even that was the best feeling in the world as you slowly regained your breathing. You looked beside you, at the discarded knife, the small bloodstains on the white sheets, and smiled, kissed the side of his mask. He caressed your face and whispered sweet nothings in your ear, before letting himself sink by your side, sweaty, spent, gorgeous. The contentment buzzed through you as you looked at the eyes behind the mask, calm and adoring.

#the grabber smut #grabber x reader #black phone #the grabber x you #the black phone x reader #the grabber #the black phone 2022 #the grabber x reader #grabber x you #the black phone #the black phone fanfic #albert shaw #albert shaw x reader #albert shaw x you #minors dni #request #horror movie fanfic #requests open

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cyborg-franky · 1 year

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Hello Franky! How are you doing? I hope you are doing well! Can I please have Ace and Zoro for prompt 1 and 15? thank you so much and I hope you have a great day😊!

I am doing okay! I crave coffee but other then that I'm good. I hope your doing well too <3

Ace X Gn Reader

SFW

Nightmares - Ace lives AU

Word Count: 520

Nightmares, horrible creeping nightmares. Ace has always been prone to them, in all the time you’d known him he always went to bed with a bracelet made of seastone, he explained it was due to the turmoil in his dreams and he didn’t want to set you, the bed or the ship on fire.

But his nightmares just got worse after Marineford. He almost died, he almost lost his brother and you almost lost Pop’s. Even in the days, weeks, and months after the event it still itched inside him, under his skin and in the corners of his mind.

During the day he was still his happy self until he was seen staring off, watching the waves with a blank expression, staring unblinkingly at the stars above. It was all a healing process and you knew that.

Sitting in bed with a book you glanced over and watched him sleep, he looked so perfect in the dim light of the lantern you used to read. The warm glow on his freckled cheeks as his chest rose and fell with shallow breathing.

He looked so at peace like this. You couldn't help yourself, you reached down and brushed his hair off his forehead, seeing his brows pinch as he mumbled in his sleep. You watched as his hand balled into a fist, a sneer replaced the calm expression he’d worn moments ago.

Ace kicked out in his sleep, he grabbed the pillow and held it for dear life, clutching it so tightly you were worried he’d break it open and feathers would explode everywhere. You moved your hand as he started to toss and turn. Names hissed in pain, fear, and anger slipped out as he started to sweat.

“Ace?” You called, placing a hand on his shoulder before he span around, you then saw the tears racing down his cheeks, sobbing to himself as he was trapped in a nightmare. You carried on shaking him, a little rougher this time “Ace, come on, wake up.”

His eyes opened wide, staring up at you as he gasped, filling his lungs with air, he sounded like a drowning man desperate to breathe. His hand shot out, gripping your shoulder as he blinked his lashes, unshed tears cascading down his face as he gulped.

Words failed him, the fear in his eyes as he trembled and you reached out, pulling him into your arms, and Ace, the same Ace who put on bright smiles, pulled pranks, and told jokes around the campfire fell apart in your arms. Gripping you as he sobbed. "Sh, sh, you're okay now." You said softly, hand in his hair, running through the strands to calm him.

“I could have lost everything,” He said between sniffles.

“But you didn’t,” You reminded him, stroking his back, fingertips running up and down his clammy skin. He took a breath, nodding. He stayed in your arms until you felt him going slack, falling asleep again.

You managed to lay you both down, keeping him close, whispering soft comforting words to him, hoping to chase the nightmares away.

#portgas d ace x reader #portgas ace x reader #one piece ace x reader #ace x reader #ace x you #ace x yourname #one piece x reader #one piece #op ace #op ace x you #sfw #gender nuetral reader #one piece reader insert #one piece x you #one piece reader imagines

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acacia-may · 25 days

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So, before you hit your romance limit, can I request my two Black Clover OC ships? Solid x Rosette and Fuegoleon x Lital. You probably need to read their profiles first, if you haven't yet. I have a tag My Black Clover OC ☘️, hope it will help you. And to give some platonic bond too, Acier & Nozel and Finral & Gauche too?

Hi there Vilandel, and thank you so much for the ask! I'd be delighted to share some thoughts with you. 💕

Solid x Rosette

I am so happy you sent in this ask and told me about Solid x Rosette because this ship is absolutely my cup of tea (and not just because they're not super gooey and romantic. [A/N: Me neither Sosette] though I do have an affinity for more pragmatic couples who are very devoted to each other even if they're not super traditionally romantic and/or are more private about their affections). The big appeal here for me is that I've always had this intense fascination with arranged marriage to lovers. I have no explanation for this, but it's an absolutely fascinating dynamic to me and something I really enjoy exploring. I'll admit that maybe I'm biased because I also chose the arranged marriage to lovers dynamic for my own Black Clover OC x CC ship, but I think it just fits the nobility and strict social order of the Clover Kingdom so perfectly in my opinion and works so incredibly well for the story you've created for Sosette.

I love the idea of Solid entering this arranged marriage because "it's what you do," but then finding himself engaged to someone kind and perceptive enough to see beyond his haughtiness to realize he isn't just a shallow snob. He is moved by the fact she trusts him, and she brings out the best in him by believing it's there. Then he has his little panic moment of "Oh no! I fell in love with my fiancee!" This is the good stuff! Also, Rosette is super cool in her own right, and I adore her (and her friendship with my girl Charmy! YES!!). I love that she's so calm, collected, and perceptive. Also she's a detective? That's so awesome (and the Poirot reference had me squealing). Also, her glass magic sounds super interesting! I'll admit I never really thought of Solid Silva as a romantic being before, but Rosette's profile and your little one shot about them sold me. They're canon now. I don't make the rules.

Lital x Fuegoleon

Lital sounds lovely as well, and her backstory is really compelling (especially the story of her adoption which was so moving and so wholesome). I love the slow burn nature of her relationship with Fuegoleon, their long history with each other, and how they bonded over being on the same magic knights' squad. I'll admit I'm not as feral about it as Sosette (seriously, I just adore that ship now), but it seems like a very sweet pairing and I'd definitely be on board for it too!

Some Platonic Bond Thoughts Too? I'm So Spoiled! 😁 Thank you so much for this! Platonic relationships are truly my real passion, so it means a lot to me to be indulged to ramble about them as well.

Mother and Son: Acier and Nozel Silva

The bond between Nozel and Acier is so incredibly compelling to me. It's nice to see such a healthy and wholesome mother and son relationship, and the series does such an incredible job of showing just how much Nozel's love for his mom and his desire to make her proud and live up to her legacy has motivated and affected him. I adore them.

Finral and Gauche Friendship

I don't think I've ever really thought about this one before, but as soon as I read your ask, I had this very vivid thought of them bonding over gushing about how much love their younger siblings (I'm sure Langris would hate that...but luckily he's not there 😂😅). That said, it's a little hard for me personally to imagine that Finral wouldn't get on Gauche's nerves, so I'm not sure I can see them as besties in the same way as Gauche and Gordon for instance, but I do like the concept of an unlikely friendship between them and them bonding over their roles as big brothers. 😊

#thank you for the ask!#Sosette is my new Black Clover OC x CC OTP #I keep collecting them #but I really shouldn't be surprised about that seeing as my friends are so talented! Of course I adore their ships 💖#solid x rosette #fuegoleon x lital #acier silva #nozel silva #finral roulacase #gauche adlai #acacia's ramblings #answered asks

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harley-sunday · 2 years

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i would die for a soft!max taking care of the reader when they have a panic attack and he’s the only one that can help calm them ooofffff anything w/soft max is an automatic win for me

Babe.

I don't what happened but I couldn't get this out of my head and so here we are. I hope I did it justice. And that you like it 😊

🧡

Pairing: Max Verstappen x reader (f)

Warnings: language.

Word count: 1k

AN: Ok. So. Wrote this when I couldn't sleep so bare with me on this one. Also, I don't usually take requests but this was too good to pass up and not really a request anyway so 🤷🏻‍♀️ and soft!Max really is everything...

Your breathing is shallow. Uneven. This- No. You know how to breathe, come on. In through your nose and- What if it's not enough? What if this is how it's going to be like forever? What if your body will never breathe on its own again? What if you'll always have to actively remind yourself how to breathe? That's not- You can't live like that, can you? Why would you want to live like that? How-

"Just calm down, sweetheart. There's nothing to panic about."

The unfamiliar voice sounds distant and distorted, like you're underwater and someone's trying to- Are you underwater? Are you drowning? Is that what this is? That gulp of water you accidentally took in while doing laps in the hotel swimming pool this morning, is that- Should you have gone to the hospital? Secondary drowning is a thing right? You've read that somewhere or maybe-

"You're safe. You know that right?"

Another voice, female this time, a little louder than the last and the accusation in their tone not lost on you. Are you safe though? Is anyone ever really safe? With the current state of the world anything could happen. Not to mention you're at a fuckin' racetrack, where the likelihood of something bad happening is tenfold. Is that why he isn't here yet? Did something happen to him? Oh God, what if-

"Oh Jesus, really? This isn't real. Snap out of it, will ya?"

Impatience. That's what you're picking up on this time. And you get it. You get that this is not how they imagined spending their time after the race. After all there's a podium ceremony to get to and sponsors to woo, and- Anything but this. Anything but you taking up their precious time with something none of them can even help you with. Great job, you think to yourself. All these people, all having somewhere more important to be. It's your fault they're here. Stuck with you. Missing important-

"She needs like a bag or something to breathe in, right?"

God, no, not the bag. You let out a frustrated moan but immediately feel ungrateful because at least this last voice sounded kinder than the others.

"No, what she needs-" Oh. Oh. "-is for you to all step back, give her space, and shut up."

This is good. You know this voice. You trust this voice. It belongs to your boyfriend. Oh. Shit. What if someone went to get him? What if he was doing press and- What if he was on the podium? Did he end up on the podium? You don't remember. Jesus, what a horrible girlfriend you are, not even remembering where he finished. He must hate being dragged into this-

"Hey," he sounds close but in a good way. Close and kind and- What if it's all just an act? What if-

"Hey," he says again, the back of his fingers ghosting over your cheek, "I'm here."

He is. Here. But there are other places he must be. Other places that are more important than here. Than you. You don't want to keep him. You don't-

"She's been like this for a while now-" Jesus, again with the accusation, you think, even though this is a different voice than before.

"Mate," Max warns whoever it is that spoke up, "step back." He doesn't stop caressing your cheek, doesn't stop touching you and for the first time since this started you feel like maybe you're treading water instead of drowning.

"Yeah, but-"

"Leave," Max all but growls, his hand moving to your shoulder as some sort of lifeline, anchoring you to him as he turns away from you ever so slightly. "You are only making this worse. Fuck off, all of you."

There is a hushed silence as his words land but then the crowd starts to disappear and it feels as if you're finally breaking the surface now that it's just you and him.

"Hey," his voice is much softer now and there's a slight increase of pressure on your shoulder as he squats in front of you. "I'm here."

You no longer feel like you're underwater, it’s almost as if his voice has guided you up from the depths of the ocean and you take a big gulp of air, your lungs filling and your vision clearing and-

"There you are," Max whispers, almost as if he's scared you'll disappear again if he's too loud. He drops his hands to your lap so he can take yours in his, thumbs rubbing soothing circles over the back of your hands.

You blink a few times, his blue eyes finally coming into focus, almost like a beacon guiding you back to safety but then a ragged breath escapes you, your head still swimming as you ride out the waves of this panic attack.

"I finished first today," Max says then and the smile tugging on the corners of his lips makes his eyes crinkle, "but I think maybe you saw that?" He doesn't wait for you to reply, knows it's best to keep going, to keep distracting you now that he's almost got you to shore, "Ferrari put up one hell of a fight, remember? Checo held them off though-" He shakes his head, "Fuckin' legend. If we make it out of this on top, this championship is as much his as it is mine. Honestly."

"Can't believe they had us wear those stupid suits though," he continues, his tone light. It helps. It always does. "I'm all for doing something special for the team's home race but I don't ever want to see the guys in lederhosen ever again-" He pulls a face and pretends there's a shiver running through him, "Or Checo."

You can't help but let out a laugh, remembering then what Red Bull made the team wear today, and immediately Max's smile grows wider.

He lets go of one of your hands so he can cup your cheek, "Hi."

"Hi," you croak out, closing your eyes as you lean into his touch.

"You're back," he simply states but there's no escaping the relief you hear in his voice.

You open your eyes and find his, "Almost." You mimic his gesture and put your hand on his cheek, the stubble of his beard rough against your palm, "Thank-"

"Nope," he shakes his head, effectively cutting you off. He puts his hands on your knees for balance and leans forward, brushing his lips against yours and simply says, "I love you," as if that is enough.

Then again, maybe it is.

#Max Verstappen x reader #F1 Fanfic #Max Verstappen fanfic #MV33 #F1 drabble #Harley answers asks #and writes a drabble #Harley Sunday x Max Verstappen

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bat-to-da-robs · 2 months

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Tease tidbit Tuesday

Goddamn, have never been tagged in something like this before, gratitude @kingofdarkness00 💜❤️.

Uhhh am plugging away at a very rough draft of a dissociative catatonia Alastor (hazbin) fic for the angst + holy shit can circumstances please force this bitch to open up about his horrendous emotional state cuz lord knows he won't do it himself. Let's see what's fit for slightly more public consumption ahaha.

Lucifer passes the blanket to Charlie. She grabs it, and looks over at Alastor. She doesn't want to admit it, but the silent vacancy of the usually untouchably powerful overlord is freaking her out. Alastor is still grinning that godawful, stretched grin, and it has even more of an unsettling context after the advice he'd given her about 'wearing a smile always to get some control.' She looks him over, the waxy quality of his skin, the glassiness of his eyes, the blue tinge to his lips even with a sheen of sweat on his forehead. In looking him over, Charlie notices the tear tracks for the first time, badly scrubbed away. It makes her stomach flip, try to climb out her throat. Alastor has always been the benefactor, not the resident, untouchable and beyond and above the various rehabilitation exercises Charlie does with the actual residents. She knows what to do and yet she's frozen, a part of her not wanting to step over the line to acknowledge the inherent brokenness of yet another father, the humanity behind the glamour a bit too hard to stare down head on.

"Come on, Charlie," and a hand is on hers, the blanket eased from her grasp, and it's Vaggie stepping forward instead, inviting herself into Alastor's space, draping the blanket gently around Alastor's shoulders, careful not to touch him. Charlie finds her eyes are still glued to him, and it's only this that allows her to see the subtle tremor run through him at the contact. So he's not fully catatonic, just, deeply dissociated?

Okay. Charlie takes a breath. She can do this. She's got frameworks for this.

She looks over Alastor again, noting the grime coating him, the fresh rips and scorch marks in his prized jacket. They're going to have to get him cleaned up and into a more comfortable environment. Which is going to be uncomfortable, but Charlie thinks it's best if he comes back to himself cleaned up and bandaged, thinks the muddy, blood-stained state he's still in might be contributing to his vacancy.

"Husk, keep talking to him," she directs to the cat, who has been murmuring a convoluted, somewhat resentful story about missing socks. "Nifty, go run a bath for him, if you would. Vaggie, can you get ready to pick him up? I know he would hate that in his usual mindframe, but we're going to have to transport him in order to get him more comfortable." She looks to Husk, and gets a grim nod of agreement. "Dad, can you teleport us as close to Alastor's apartment as you can get without overly taxing yourself against his wards?"

"Of course, sweetheart," her dad replies, tone quiet but sure, firm, confident. More empathetic than Charlie had expected. She looks over to him, draws on his unusual calm surity, and feels herself breathe a little easier.

She scans Alastor one more time, notes the full body tension, the shallowness of his breathing, and makes another executive decision, turning to Angel Dust.

And I'll tag @whileyoureinschoolidothisallday, @cathothal and @cosmictapestry, but obvi only if y'all want haha. Is a tag challenging you to share a few paragraphs of something you're currently writing 😊.

#hazbin hotel #hazbin alastor #hazbin #dissociative catatonia #tease tidbit tuesday #tidbit tuesday #hazbin fanfic

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xxgoblin-dumplingxx · 1 year

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Could we maybe get badman Jason doing some self care with little mouse to try and help her feel better? Maybe some face masks? Please and thank you for your time and for reading this. I don’t know how you always manage to post so often, it’s amazing 🫀❤️😊

I spend a lot of time dissociating and doing sad bitch things... also I hate working out and I can only listen to so many true crime podcasts while I work out.

Jason wondered as he watched the massage therapist work on you, how long it had been since anyone had touched you in any meaningful way.

You were still tense. It had been 15 minutes and at no point had you relaxed. Your breathing was shallow and he could see how tightly you were clenching your jaw. This was supposed to help- after the physical therapy that was supposed to build you back up after how ill you'd been and how long you'd been in bed.

Was it because he was there? Was it a stranger touching you? Or were you just dealing with other demons? He didn't know. But, he figured anything would be better than listening to your shallow breathing and the therapist desperately trying to get you to a place where you'd relax enough that she could do something for you. So he pulled his phone out. And pulled up a music app. Any app. And tried to find a song he thought you help.

It was hard to tell but- something calm. Something he remembered from the crate of vinyl in your room. Settling finally on something that sounded like it could be a lullaby. And it didn't happen all at once but, gradually some of the tension left your face and your fists unclenched.

"Better?" he asked quietly, reaching up and laying a hand on your forearm.

"Yeah," you murmur exhaling slowly.

"Any requests?" he asked, smiling a little.

"Just this one again."

"As many times as you want," he said, catching the therapist's eye. And she nodded, noting that she was finally able to get some of the stiffness out of your body. And Jason just hoped that you weren't too far gone. That you could believe you were worth being taken care of.

#Jason Todd #Jason Todd x reader #badman!jason #ask answered #minors dni

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jahayla-parker · 2 years

Text

Self-Care Compromise: Tom Holland x Reader

Disclaimer: I do not own the above video, the creator is listed in the video.

Summary: Y/n once again finds her boyfriend Tom to be overworking himself so she takes matters into her own hands to fix it.

Warnings: None, just fluff 💕(other than brief mentions of being burnt out from working too much)

Notes: this is based on many videos similar to the one included where Tommy looks so tired but still fights for the fans.

I felt it was time someone fought for him so 🥺

The ending is not rigid so that if I want to do a part 2 (such as tasks discussed for the next day, etc.) I can 😊

———————

“Thanks Mac!” Y/n says, grabbing the freshly made tea from the barista on the set of Tom’s latest project.

“No problem y/n/n” Mac waves before starting the next order.

Y/n breathes in the pleasant scent of the tea she ordered for Tom as she walks back over to where they planned to meet before they headed back to the hotel.

It had been a long day on set for Tom today. Although, if they were being honest, it had been a really long week for him.

The crew have been working him to the breaking point and instead of listening to y/n’s pleas for him to take a day off, he kept pushing through.

Tom was waiting on the sidewalk by the barricades. He was in his loose sweats, relaxed T-shirt, and beanie.

He couldn’t wait until they made it back to the hotel for the night.

Tom loved his job and his fans. But, he just wanted to rest on the couch cuddled into y/n’s side as they ate take-out and watched stupid reality TV shows while he fell asleep.

At this point, he would give anything to just not have to keep forcing a smile and pretending he wasn’t exhausted. But, as fans began approaching him, he realized he wasn’t going to get that.

Tom took a shallow breath and pasted on a fake smile as his fans came over asking for photos.

Harry felt pity for Tom as he watched his brother. Tom looked like he was going to pass out at any moment but they both knew neither one could say no or mention something about him wanting to leave.

Harry sighted hopelessly as he stood to the side of Tom and his fans. His eyes only looking away when he heard someone else approaching.

Y/N’s eyes were glued on Tom and she wanted to wrap her arms around him and never let him go. He looked so drained.

Hearing a soft sigh, y/n turned her gaze to Harry and nodded in agreement.

“How long has this been going on this time?” Y/n asked as Tom once again forced a fake smile for the fans.

This had happened nearly every day. If he kept at it, he was going to break and get sick. Y/n knew he wanted to make time for the fans, but there’s a line.

Everyday, y/n had found small ways to try and help him with this. He refused to listen to her begging him to rest, but that didn’t mean she was going to give up.

So, instead of arguing, she settled to forcing self care tasks upon him. It had become somewhat of a daily ritual at this point.

Each healthy behavior she started him doing would pile on top of the other so that she was slowly ensuring more of his time was going towards self care.

The typical routine would consist of herbal teas (especially those for relaxation) throughout the day, night time tea upon finishing for the day so he could sleep that night, a healthy homemade breakfast rather than his damn protein shakes, and cuddling while watching the reality tv shows he and Baz had watched in London to help with his homesickness.

She’d even gotten him to start using face masks (sometimes the ones with silly characters to cheer him up) and cold eye masks, weekly hair conditioning treatments she’d apply as he would wash his hair daily due to sweating all day and not being used to his longer hair, using a weighted blanket each night, etc.

While the self care plan may seem successful, there were plenty of failures too.

She had tried implementing them taking walks as it always calmed him, but each time they’d run into fans and it would undo everything.

Y/n also tried working with Nikki and Dom to send Tessa out for a week or two for an emotional support animal therapy type thing for Tom.

But, while here, Tessa was too energetic and excited and managed to urinate all over the hotel floor when seeing Tom. It only got worse from there as she chewed on his set lists, socks, etc.

Tessa only ever did these things when nervous; a rarity for her. Y/n was certain Tessa had picked up on Tom’s energy.

The warmth from Tom’s tea seeping into her palm brought y/n’s attention back to the present moment.

Tom was looking over at her in between photos, his eyes delicate but missing their usual light.

Tom’s smile for the photos and fans may have been forced, but his smile to y/n when their eyes met wasn’t.

It wasn’t his normal smile by any means, but he’d always have enough in him to give her at least a tiny smile.

Y/n gave him a sympathetic smile and sighed.

“I’ve got to do something Baz” y/n groaned.

“We can’t. People will have a field day with it and will attack us” Harry frowned.

Y/n nodded and felt a small wave of hope upon seeing the last fan thanking Tom and leaving.

She let out a sigh of relief and handed Tom the tea with one hand while the other went behind his back to hold him to her.

Tom let out a deep breath as he tucked his head into the crook of her neck.

“Tommy, we’ve got to figure this out. You’re overdoing it” y/n says as she feels Tom’s lip quivering on her shoulder.

Tom was silent but nodded his head against her skin.

Y/n smiled softly, glad he was at least on the same page now.

“Okay, so here’s the plan” she says, stepping back to look in his eyes.

Tom lifted his eyes and y/n’s heart broke even more as she noticed his watery gaze.

“Oh love” y/n frowns, reaching up to stroke his face.

“I love you” Tom whispers, his voice weak.

“T, I love you too. We’re going to fix this. Tonight though, let’s just go home and-“ y/n says, running her thumb gently under his eyes.

However, her instructions were cut off when another group of fans approached.

Tom closed his eyes briefly to compose himself so they wouldn’t see.

Y/n sighed and held his face in her hands, “baby, you do not need to do this”.

He shrugged and sighed before forcing on a smile, “do I look okay?”

“No” y/n said causing Tom to freeze in shock.

“Tom you’re always gorgeous. But no, you don’t look okay. Because you’re not. I’m done with this, I’m handling it. Now” she says, letting go of his face and placing her hands on her hips.

“Love, I appreciate it but I’ll manage” Tom says as a yawn ironically escapes.

Y/n gives him a knowing look and he bites his lip. He is beyond appreciative of her and her protectiveness over him.

However, he knows his publicist and agents would lose it if he told fans that he didn’t feel like doing photos.

He’d told her this in the past and she argued that she could do it herself then. Tom then told her that he didn’t want her to get hate from the fans even though he appreciated the offer.

While looking into her eyes, Tom realized she was past the point of caring what happened to her anymore.

It was a feeling he knew well. Whenever people would get too close or aggressive to her in public, he was the same way.

“Hey guys” y/n said, trying to sound like she was in a good mood but also demonstrating she was needing them to listen.

The fans greeted her and then promptly asked to speak to Tom.

Y/n shook her head, making eye contact with Harry and nodding towards Tom’s security guard.

Harry nodded once and walked over to explain to the security guard what needed to happen.

It was clear to Baz by her body language that she was done with Tom being overworked and wanted to ask the fans to give him space and time.

Harry told the guard he wasn’t exactly sure if y/n wanted him to help should she get hurt in response or if she wanted him to help get Tom out of the area instead. He had his suspicions and upon looking back at her, she nodded her head backwards in nonverbal confirmation that she wanted Tom out.

Y/n had been calmly trying to explain to the fans how hard Tom had been working. She was hoping they would then understand how he was feeling and let him be.

And, some of them did. Others did not get the point and instead cheered and still asked for photos with him.

Upon the security agent approaching Tom, y/n sighed and explained to the fans he would not be staying today.

The fans began mumbling and arguing but it wasn’t clear what they were saying.

Tom’s security had him gripped by the upper arm but he was defiantly staying planted where he was.

He was not going to leave her.

Tom whispered in argument to his security that he would not be leaving until they got her out of her.

Y/n turned around and used her eyes to plead with him to leave. Once he was in the car, she was planning on thanking the respectful fans and then joining him.

But, despite his very visible exhaustion and desire to leave, he wouldn’t part from her side.

Tom tried to get closer to her but his security had a firm grip on him.

Just as y/n was about to rush her thank you message to the fans so she could drag him to the car herself, she noticed the guilty look on his face and saw his muscles twitch the way they do when he started getting a headache.

It was only then that y/n realized how loud the fans/scene was.

Taking a deep breath, she stepped closer to the fans, Tom’s fingers instinctively reaching for her and brushing against her wrist in an attempt to stop her.

Y/n turned her head slightly to see him and blew him a soft kiss before facing the fans again.

“Hi guys, please try to speak softer” y/n says, waving at them to get their attention.

Some of the calmer fans complied, but the others only started asking more questions.

“Please. I know you guys want to see Tom and he loves you all. But his head is hurting so loud noises as great as it is to see how excited you all are, it is making it worse” y/n sighs and the fans instantly stop their comments.

“He’s been working so hard on this project for you guys and as much as he’d love to have time to spend with you all, he needs to rest. He’s been pushing through daily and it isn’t good for him, so please respect that he is going to be leaving right now” she adds, the fans all seeming to hang onto every word.

“Tom wouldn’t deny you guys the chance to meet with him, even when it is detrimental to his well-being. So I’m stepping in to do that for him. Feel free to respond as you wish to that. But, we are leaving now to get him home to rest either way. I just plead that you realize he needs this but that he still appreciates you all. Thank you” y/n says, turning to face Tom.

Tom can feel the tears in his eyes again as his girlfriend pleads with his fans and soon enough his vision of her is clouded and blurry.

Tom shakingly reaches his hand out to her as she approaches him.

He gives her a grateful smile and kisses her cheek when she’s close enough.

“Y-you.. thank you darling” Tom whimpers, slipping out of the guards grip and into her embrace.

“I’m always here T, regardless of who I have to piss off to do so” she says, holding him closer to her as they walk to the car.

As y/n walks, she keeps her eyes down on the beautiful boy holding onto her, his head tucked down to rest on her chest as they make their way to the car.

“Here” y/n says, reaching for the cup of tea that is awkwardly pinched between his arm and her body.

Tom looks up and shakes his head, “I want it”.

Y/n giggles sweetly at him and nods, moving her hand from his cup and then up to his head as she starts stroking his hair.

Tom blushes and gives her a soft smile; genuine but still minimal due to his exhaustion.

“Why don’t you sleep baby?” Y/n whispers as Tom lays his head on her shoulder when they get into the car.

Tom’s eyes remain slightly closed due to the sheer weight of them at this point, but they never leave y/n’s face.

“‘m wanna spend time wi’ you” Tom says, his accent causing his words to blend excessively.

Y/n grins over at him and kisses his cheek.

“Rest on the drive and I’ll wake you when we get to the hotel” she assures him.

Tom lovingly nods and lets his eye completely close.

Y/n smiles down at him, happy he is finally sleeping.

She doesn’t risk kissing his cheek as she doesn’t want him to wake up so she settles for lowering her head to rest on his as he snores softly.

Since her head is resting on his, she can’t see his face so she lets her eyes settle on his hand laying on her thigh.

She smiles as she sees the rings she bought him starting to show signs of wear from how often he has them on.

One of the rings she got him -his favorite ring- has an engraving on it facing his palm. By now, it is slightly faded as he tends to rub over the engraving with his thumb when nervous or missing her.

Y/n makes a mental note to take it to the store tomorrow while he’s on set and therefore can’t have it on.

Usually Harry has it on him so when Tom’s between shoots or scenes he can put it back on briefly.

You’d think it were a wedding band with the way he treats it and always wants it back on, but it’s not.

That doesn’t stop him from being enamored by it as it holds an important meaning to him.

Not only is the ring from the woman he loves more than anything in the world, it also has a special message on it.

The engraving on the back of this ring is the coordinates of where they first met.

She knew she’d have to tell Tom she was taking it from Harry because he’d panic if he didn’t have it when he went to put it on between takes.

She’d prefer to do it as a surprise for him, but she’d settle for him being relaxed.

Hopefully though, there will be a longer scene that would take an hour or so to get through so she could sneak it back in place before he’d be done.

“Are you scheming?” Harry whispers, turning to look back at them from his position in the front seat.

Y/n snaps her eyes up to him and smirks, “no. Not technically. But I’d like to get his ring re-engraved and cleaned tomorrow as a surprise”.

“You think he won’t notice it’s gone? Y/n/n he almost yelled at me when I left it in the trailer instead of on me once” Harry laughs quietly.

Y/n rolls her eyes and turns her head to kiss Tom’s head softly now that she’s sure he’s in deeper sleep and less likely to be prompted to wake up.

“It shouldn’t take more than thirty minutes. Is there any scenes we can take advantage of?” She asks, stroking Tom’s hair.

“You two are cloyingly endearing” Harry groans despite a smile on his face, “yes we can make it work”.

Y/n smiles and whispers a soft thank you, briefly looking up at Harry.

Harry nods, “thank you. For all of that, and this, and everything” his arms waving around as if pointing to the different scenes.

Y/n blushes and tucks her head closer to Tom’s as they continue their way to the hotel.

———

“Okay, so we’ve got a panda one, a cat one, and a… I think it’s a unicorn.. one” y/n says, holding up the three face sheet masks to the boys.

Tom smiles up at her from his position on the couch. When they got back, y/n had asked him to get into more comfortable clothes after he took his desired shower while she went and got them all takeout with Harry.

Harry had entered the living room before her so that he could set the food down as she went to grab the face masks.

“‘mm either love” Tom grinned as he shuffled in his seat so she could join him.

“Okay, unicorn it is” y/n giggled, tossing him it. “Baz?”

“Panda obviously” Harry shrugged and say down next to Tom.

“Eh, that’s y/n/n’s spot” Tom whined, shoving his brother.

“Tom it’s fine, I want to change first. So, he can sit there for a moment” y/n laughed, trying to have him compromise with Harry.

Harry smirked. Y/n and Tom were both certain he’d taken her seat on purpose to start trouble but after the chaos of today, neither cared to argue.

——

Tom looked up from his dinner as y/n walked back into the room wearing his sweats and her sleep shirt, a smile forming on his tired face.

Y/n smiled at him and kissed his forehead as she grabbed her to-go container and settled in next to him; noting Harry had moved to his own seat.

Tom adjusted the blanket he had until it covered her shoulders and she leaned against him to rest her head on his shoulder as she slowly ate.

Tom sighed in bliss as he pulled her closer with his free hand as he took another bite.

He was so thankful to be home and resting. He had only her to thank for making that possible. And he had, a lot.

It felt like he was thanking her each and every single step up the stairs to their hotel room.

She didn’t need his gratitude, she just needed to know he was okay and safe. Tom however, needed her to know how much he appreciated it.

The compromise? Her accepting his compliments and grateful sentiments anytime he came up. Tom happy knowing she was aware how he felt and showing his appreciation through nonverbal cues instead.

—-

While the three of them were watching tv, Harry stepped out of the room for a moment to take a call.

“Love?” Tom asks tenderly, his fingers dancing over y/n’s hand.

Y/n hummed in response, looking over at her boyfriend.

“Are they being kind?” Tom whispered, pointing to her phone.

Y/n furrowed her eyebrows briefly until she realized what he meant; the fans on the internet.

She nodded, stroking his face as she reassured him “actually yeah. Obviously they were understanding you need a break, which is good because if they hadn’t been I probably would have been banned from Twitter…”

Tom blushed and laughed in agreement. There was a reason he never used Twitter.

“But they also haven’t been as bad as I was expecting towards me” she shrugs, “I mean even when nothing happens we both get random hate comments, but this isn’t anything drastically more than normal”.

“I’m glad… but there should be a normal” Tom frowns snuggling closer to her warmth.

Y/n hums in agreement as she plays with his hair. It’s still silky but he could use another conditioning treatment tomorrow.

“Hey, uhh, y/n/n, have a sec?” Harry asks, re-entering the room.

Tom gives Harry a questioning look but y/n simply nods and kisses Tom’s cheek as she detangles herself from him.

Tom pouts as he watches her cross the living room to Harry.

Harry whispers something to y/n who only nods and takes the phone from him before stepping out.

Tom glares at his younger brother, “who is it?”.

Baz laughs and rolls his eyes, “mum you Div. She wanted to talk to y/n for a moment”.

—-

“No dear, I’m completely sincere about this. I cannot express how relieved you made me today. I’ve been seeing that look of exhaustion on his face for days but he would not listen to me” Nikki states.

Y/n bites her lip, feeling guilty that Nikki thinks Tom is safe with her there even though he was fighting her on this matter.

She sighs, “yeah… to be fair. He wouldn’t listen to me either. He’s been a bit stubborn”.

Nikki laughs, “he usually is. Harry told me that Tom’s been doing self care things though because of you. So even if he just started listening today, at least his care for you caused him to cooperate”.

Y/n fights a blush and smiles to herself, “I’m really happy he did, he was stressing me out. I hate seeing him overextend himself”.

“I know you do dear. We are so blessed that you guys have each other. Please be sure you’re not overdoing it either, even if with the intent of helping him” Nikki pleads.

“I promise, I’ll be careful” y/n agrees.

“Good because we care about you both and you guys need each other. I will let you get back to your night, I just wanted to thank you verbally” Nikki says, referring to the fact the two had texted on this matter earlier today.

“Always. Did you want to speak with Tom?” Y/n asks, turning around to walk back inside. “He’s awake but relaxing on the couch presently”.

“Oh, sure then. Thank you y/n. Love you dear” nikki says, a smile evident from her tone.

“Love you too, here he is” y/n says, handing the phone to Tom who hasn’t left the couch.

Tom smiles at his girlfriend and tugs her hand to get her to sit with him.

As Tom talks to his mom, his grip around y/n tightens as he sinks further into the couch.

Even if Nikki was mostly scolding him for not taking better care of himself, speaking with her, while holding y/n was everything to him in that moment.

He had the most amazing support system and wouldn’t trade it for anything.

#tom holland x reader #tom holland #tom holland fluff #my writing #tom holland x y/n #tommy baby #Tom holland x gf!reader #Tom holland tired #Tom holland fans #Tom holland TikTok #Tom holland self care #Tom holland sad #Tom holland hurt comfort

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yonghoontual · 2 years

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a whole lot of loving onewe under the cut

ok, so, it's later and i'm ready to gush about onewes concert!!

personal highlights:

- everything

- really tho but specifically amazing livestream and live subs i dont think i've ever had this little problems with watching sth live on stream, some of the camera shots were also like really pretty? like the artistry 😌😌

- i know i love every onewe song but gosh this setlist 💕💗💕

- i love how they always introduce themselves. can't believe yonghoon was the most normal one lmao

- everyone looked so happy during all the stages it was dazzling! 😍

- yonghoons voice yonghoons voice yonghoons voice. god. but really! who else sounds this good live?? just out of this world asdghjkl 😭🤩😍🥰❤️

- same with dongmyeong. he has improved so much over the last years regarding his live vocals (not that he was ever bad to begin with, not at all but imo he did get outshined by yh a bit in that department, at least. but i'm also yh biased and keep my yh tunnel vision goggles on at all times so- 🤷🏼‍♀️)

-the unit perfomances?????? dongmyeong and yonghoon singing i will never love again from the a star is born ost? that shit was breathtaking, yo. 💯💯✨ like oh my god. I really ascended towards heaven 😇🥰🥰(ngl when i heard they were singing sth from a star is born i was really dreading it was gonna be shallow - i hate that song - but thank god they came through👌🏻👌🏻👌🏻)

- the instrumental unit too....🔥🔥🔥like these men are so freaking good at what they are doing, i am just impressed all over again 🤩

- again the songs??? all my faves were in there - love me, cosmos, orbit, parting, veronica, aurora, eraser, trauma - and i love how they rearrange their older stuff to give the audience a new experience, like regulus omggggggg i am still stunned.

- yonghoon going off on stage, jumping around, interacting with all the members, kneeling in front of weves - while keeping stable vocals, king - is all i ever need to see in life, thank you 💕💗💖💕💗

- also dongmyeong and yonghoon about to cry during reminisce about all and having to take breaks while singing? what are yall doing to me??? its tears city in this one 🥲🥲🥲

- the quick close up shots of cya and kanghyun playing the bass/guitar, loved that a whole lot muah 😘

- mr JU HARIN TAKING OFF HIS SHIRT out of nowhere and acting like nothings wrong 😵😵😵, the audience consecutively screaming (which they werent allowd bc of covid) and yonghoon immediately trying to calm them down before they get thrown out. what a ride!

- weves clapping for like five mins for the encore stage lmao that was funny and then onewe come out after a wardrobe change and i just- i will just put this "It's okay if I get lost, we've got each other." almost started full on sobbing when i read that PLS RBW give us the tshirts as merch or i will have to do it myself!

- ok lets get the one thing i wasnt enthusiastic about out of the way: the live stream cut off for online watchers before the second encore, which seemed to be on purpose bc they wanted to give offline watchers a little treat - ok, sweet, i get that - but did it have to be logo and from??????????? LOGO????? imma cry a bit..the pain of not being able to fly to sk and go to the concert in person...smh 😭😭🥲😔😔😔

- ok, moving on, last but not least im gonna mention a few little things i really loved: harin trying to sing; yonghoon ruffling cyas hair 💕 and playing at the keyboard with dongmyeong while singing; kanghyun saying his throat was sore from singing (he said he sings the chords while playing guitar) and yonghoon being like 'are u saying this to me right now??? 🤨 drink water' (pls i love these two); cya smiling so much during his verses; dongmyeong always standing with his hands on his hips when he speaks, so freaking adorable; yonghoon turning towards shirtless harin and grinning while they play ring on my ears. please im so glad the cameras caught all these little moments😊😊😊

ok thats it for now, i think when the vod becomes available i will watch it again and liveblog (lets hope logo and from are on there, i cant live off of fancams). until then, i just wanna say how happy i am to have found onewe and how fun this concert was for me and i love them all so so much!!💖💖💖

#onewe #o! new e!volution ll #onewe concert thoughts #tp #pls i need those shirts i NEED them. wait. make them a hoodie i dont like tshirts. ok maybe i could cut off the sleeves like dongmyeong yea #beware this is a long post

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lurkingwhump · 4 years

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Darkest Before the Dawn

Here we go, the final chapter 😊. This one isn’t quite as angsty as the previous chapter.

If you’d rather read this on FFN, it’s here. Enjoy!

Darkest Before the Dawn, Chapter 3

Jane was broken out of her thoughts by a sudden jerk of Kurt’s arm. He was moving restlessly on the bed again, but still asleep. He didn’t appear to be as agitated as he was two days before when he had dreamt of Bethany and Bill, but Jane still worried, remembering how terrified the nightmare had left him. She got up from the chair, and sat on the edge of the mattress beside her husband. She felt her own exhaustion sit on her shoulders, sucking the last of her energy. But she had to keep pushing, Kurt needed her.

She placed her hand on his forehead, the continuing fever making her frown with worry. His temperature was climbing: the medication didn’t seem to be working. His voice rose in his sleep, sounding like he was arguing with someone but she couldn’t make out the words.

She ran her hand through his hair, hoping to calm him. “Everything’s okay, Kurt. It’s okay.” Her tender touches and murmured assurances gradually soothed his anxiety, and he fell back into a deep sleep. She stayed where she was, holding his hand as she watched his chest rise and fall as he slept. His continuing fever alarmed her. He desperately needed antibiotics, but Ice Cream had said this safehouse was the last favor he would do for them.

“Oh, Kurt,” she whispered to his sleeping form, the anxiety sitting firmly in the pit of her stomach as she caressed his face. His beard had grown longer, more of a proper beard now than the scruff he normally had. It felt different under her touch, foreign almost. She made a mental note to ask him if he wanted her to help him shave when he was more lucid again. But that would have to wait.

With a sad sigh, she reached for the washcloth on the bedside table, dipping it in a bowl of water next to it before wringing it out. Cautious of the burns on his shoulder, she dabbed his neck and face with the cool cloth, hoping to give him some relief. Kurt flinched, opening his eyes groggily as she put it on his forehead.

“Jane?” He grunted, barely lucid.

“Shhh,” she shushed him. “Rest.” Clearly too tired to speak, a trace of a smile touched his lips as he recognized her voice and closed his eyes again.

Hours passed as she kept her vigil beside her husband, holding his larger hand in hers, tracing his knuckles tenderly as she murmured endearments into his ear, willing for him to fight on. But now he had gone still, his entire body burning up. His breathing was more rapid, shallower. He was fading.

Jane turned her eyes down, her vision blurring from tears as she looked at the wooden floor. She could no longer contain the hurt and the fear of losing Kurt, and whimpered as the tears came. Her shoulders shook as she cried quietly. In addition to the pain and fear she felt guilt. Guilt for the things she had said and done as Remi, how she had manipulated him. Kurt had forgiven her, as he always did, but still she could feel the guilt gnawing at her.

She swallowed thickly, reaching out to stroke his hair. For a moment she simply ran her hand through his hair. With the tears still tracing down her cheeks she leaned closer, almost pressing her lips to his ear as she whispered, “I’m sorry, Kurt. I’m so sorry.”

Jane didn’t know how much time had passed, when she heard a quiet knock on the door. Patterson opened the door and stepped inside cautiously, making eye contact with her.

“How is he?” She asked softly, glancing at Kurt’s still form on the bed.

With Patterson’s gentle question, the tears blurred Jane’s vision again and her voice shook, despite her best efforts.

“The medication isn’t working…the fever won’t go down and he’s getting weaker.” She gave Kurt a loving look, before leaning her forehead against her palm and staring at the floor. “He needs antibiotics, Patterson, or he will die. But we can’t risk taking him to a hospital: Madeline’s goons or the CIA will get him, and I can’t let that happen.” She gave Patterson a desperate glance before leaning against her palm again. ”And you heard Ice Cream. He said this safehouse was the last thing he’d help us with.” Her voice was even quieter, defeated almost, with her next words. “Even if he’d agree to help us, how would we repay him? Our assets were frozen, and we’ve almost used what we had.”

“We still might have a way,” her friend replied.

“What?” Jane looked up, sniffling.

“I still have an account that they haven’t found, probably because Rich insisted on creating it through his “contacts”, Patterson said, making air quotes. “I thought he was crazy, but I didn’t tell him no.”

Jane felt a faint glimmer of hope.

“So, with some of that money, I might be able to persuade Ice Cream to get Kurt the antibiotics and medical assistance he needs.”

“You’d do that?” Jane looked at Patterson, knowing her friend could see the desperation in her eyes.

She nodded, smiling faintly. “Of course. We’re family.”

Jane got up, pulling Patterson into a fierce hug. “Thank you!” She gave a shaky whisper.

***************************************************************************************

Kurt moaned tiredly, thinking he heard Patterson’s voice from somewhere, like through a fog. Where’s Jane? He tried to open his eyes, but it felt like a massive effort. He moved his hand slightly, now definitely recognizing his friend’s voice, as she grabbed his hand briefly and said something unintelligible to him before leaving.

It was as if lead weights were pressing down on his eyes, but he slowly forced them open. He blinked a few times, trying to get his bearings. He felt exhausted, fuzzy. He could feel the thrumming ache of the burns, but it wasn’t as intense as before. He peered down at his chest, and noticed fresh dressings covering the burns. Looking more closely, he realized he had an IV attached to his hand, the line leading to a bag of clear liquid hanging from the headboard. “What the hell…?” He frowned. They didn’t have access to medical equipment like this. “Where the hell am I?” Something was wrong, he needed to get out of here. He sat up, groaning as a bout of nausea hit him, right at the same moment his ribs protested at the too-sudden movement.

He was just about to reach for the IV catheter, when he saw Jane enter the room in his peripheral vision.

“Hey, you’re awa–“ the soft greeting died on her lips and she rushed to him, grabbing his hand lightly. “No, Kurt,” she shook her head, catching his eye, ”don’t touch it.”

“Jane? What is this? What happened?” He rasped, noticing how parched he was as, he fought to quell the nausea.

“You’re in no condition to get up.” She grabbed his arm and good shoulder, her tone calming. ”Come on, lie down,” she cajoled as she guided him back down onto the pillows.

Kurt closed his eyes for a moment and waited for the queasiness to pass.

“Here.” He felt her press a glass to his lips gently, as she helped him drink. “Just a sip. We don’t want you to throw up.”

Even the small amount of water helped, the coolness feeling wonderful in his throat.

Feeling marginally better, he opened his eyes a crack so that he could see Jane. Leaning back against the pillows again, he noticed how drained and exhausted he was.

“What happened?” He tried again, unable to mask the anxiety he felt.

Jane’s face grew serious again, as she reached out to stroke his cheek. He leaned into the comforting, familiar touch, waiting for her to speak.

“You really gave us a scare,” she said softly. “Your burns got infected, and you developed a high fever.” She went on, “If it hadn’t been for Patterson’s secret account, we might have lost you.”

Kurt reached for her hand, squeezing it gently. He knew that feeling, the fear and anguish reflected in his wife’s eyes. He had been in her shoes barely a month before. “Jane…”

She drew a shuddering breath. “It’s okay, now. Patterson was able to use the money to get a doctor to see you, that’s why you have the IV.” She glanced at the IV bag before turning her attention back to him. “You were unconscious, and dehydrated from the fever and the burns, so the IV was the best way to keep you hydrated and start the antibiotics.”

“I don’t remember any of it.”

“That’s not surprising. You’ve been asleep for over a day, since the antibiotics started working and your fever broke. But now that you’re better, we can remove the IV, at least.” Jane’s tone was reassuring. She gazed at him lovingly, running her hand through his hair in a soothing manner. “How do you feel now?”

“Exhausted. My body feels like I’ve run a marathon.” He closed his eyes, grunting as he shifted into a more comfortable position.

“You need to take it slow. It’s going to take a while to get your strength back. But I have something that I’ve been keeping safe for you. Hold on.”

He heard her get up and walk to a dresser by the wall, rummaging in one of the drawers.

She sat back beside him, holding a sooty, slightly frayed paper in her hand.

It looked vaguely familiar to him, but in his tired mind he couldn’t place it, until she pressed it into his hand. “Here. I’ve been holding onto that for you,” Jane whispered lovingly.

He opened the paper with shaking hands, moisture in his eyes. It was Bethany’s drawing. The one that he had managed to snatch from his locker as they left the NYO to avoid capture.

He gazed at Jane in gratitude. She must have seen the unspoken question in his eyes, since she spoke in a low, tender tone.

“I found that in the rubble of the cabin, when I searched for you. I was afraid it would be the only thing of you that I’d find.” Jane leaned in to give him a soft, lingering kiss. She stayed where she was, her breath warming his cheek. “With all that happened, I forgot I had it. But now it’s where it belongs.”

“Thank you.”

She stayed close to him for a little while, both of them just enjoying the moment. Finally, she sat up, observing him for a second. “I know you’re tired, but do you think you could try and eat something?”

He glanced at the ceiling, realizing he did feel a bit hungry. Adjusting his position, he caught a glimpse of Patterson through the doorway. She was biting into a slice of pizza. It had been a couple of weeks since he’d last had pizza, the pizzas in their little hostage-taking stunt having eluded him. He nodded at Patterson right as she turned towards him, and called out to her gruffly "Is there any more where that came from?"

Jane merely chuckled in reply.

#blindspot #blindspot fanfic #jeller #kurt weller #jane doe #angst #hurt/comfort #lurkingwhump #Fic: Darkest Before the Dawn

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