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legitimateluffy · 3 years

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One Piece Animation Thesis: Sabaody

One of my favourite arcs not only story wise but production wise! There’s a lot to talk about in this one, but it should be fun and I’ve really been looking forward to it!

The Master Google Doc is found [HERE]

Here are the individual posts that are posted here on Tumblr: [East Blue] [Alabasta] [Skypiea] [Water Seven] [Enies Lobby] [Thriller Bark] [Sabaody] [Impel Down] [Marineford] [Fishman Island] [Punk Hazard] [Dressrosa] [Zou] [Whole Cake Island] [Reverie] [Wano]

Sabaody is a great small arc that is, once again, a pivotal point in the One Piece story. Seems like every arc to One Piece is important. How does Oda do it.

Kazuya Hisada continues his role as character designer for his second arc, which allowed me to find a new character sheet for Luffy in his base form and we can compare how styles and times have changed.

Left is Kizumi, right is Hisada.

Luffy’s look has slowly changed throughout the series, and while watching it, it’s something that is easily not noticed, especially when binge watching. However when you take time to step back and compare designs, the differences are quite noticeable.

Early Luffy’s design had quite short legs and torso, and his features were a lot more exaggerated. His hands and feet were massive, and his hair is thinner with more individual strands of his bangs being shown. Lineart was also thicker, especially with his eye scar being somewhat thicker and more prominent compared to later designs where the line variation is practically non-existent. The straw hat also felt more flat, lacking any type of depth in the brim while also fitting his head more snuggly.

The design used for Sabaody shows Luffy to be taller than his beginner design, however not as tall and lanky as that of the Water Seven-Enies Lobby era. Less hair strands are used for his hair, reducing the number of bangs. His face remains being round, however his smile is not as prominent and exaggerated like it once was. The biggest change I think is definitely how the hat is drawn. The top of the hat doesn’t fit as snuggly as it once did, and the brim begins to have more depth. At this point, the hat is fine however in some instances it can be very overdrawn and bloated and it, quite frankly, looks so awkward and large on his head that it looks absolutely ridiculous.

These are the designs of Luffy from the specials Episode of Nami and Episode of East Blue respectively.

However during this time, Sabaody till Impel Down is an arc that feels quite loose and is a little jarring to the rest of the series. This is definitely not a bad thing and I think is quite welcomed, especially due to One Piece being a long running anime series. Change is necessary otherwise it looks boring, stale and repetitive. That is, when it is executed properly and boy does Sabaody knock it out of the Sabaody park (Haha). Ba Dum Tss. Yeah yeah, look Tuna forced me to put that in so thank him for that. Unfortunately, many believe this arc to be one of the ugliest because of its loose style in places. But this is something that I think greatly enhances and appropriately fits the style of One Piece and Oda’s wacky designs.

This is a plus in my book. Having a good character designer and strong character designs allows animators to be more flexible in what they’re working with. That is why, up to this point, Baron Omatsuri was the best animated thing that Toei had produced at the time in regards to One Piece. So let’s have a look as to who shines as bright as Kizaura’s leg before striking down Zoro’s head.

Naotoshi Shida continues to show off his striking skills, especially with Rayleigh’s striking kick against Kizaru. The camera moves with the character, with incredibly smooth movement and his iconic sharp shading and effects.

Yoshikazu Tomita shows off how powerful his hits and effects hit, making each of his scenes feel incredibly powerful.

This is the last time that Naoki Tate is this prominent in the series with his key animation. His style is absolutely incredible, having very subtle character acting showcasing the absolute terror of the situation. He continues to pop up here and there as the series goes on.

Ryo Onishi makes a great spectacle here, really portraying his character acting in this arc. You can feel exactly how each character is feeling and their thoughts all without even hearing the voices of the characters as well as music placement.

Hiromi Ishigami makes sparse appearances throughout the series, having a similar style to Tate during this period. Subtle movements and pudgy shapes are used to make the character convey their actions.

Ken-ichi Fufisawa makes his characters feel really bouncy. Luffy feels like actual rubber in his cuts by the way he makes the arms flail when stretched.

Kenji Kuroyanagi really knows how to turn and rotate the characters in his scenes. He also makes simple scenes look interesting, with Hancock he makes the whole body move in order for her to pull her arm up. He also knows how to make the camera follow the characters so it always feels like the scene is moving.

——————-——————-——————-——————-–

A massive thank you to everyone who has participated and uploaded at Sakugabooru! Without it, I would not have been able to make nearly as much as I have without all the hard work in identifying and tagging animators’ work! Most of the footage used to showcase these animators has come from there! I simply just turned the videos into gifs for an easier showcase.

I would also like to issue a big thank you to Animators Corner! The staff listing really helped me in determining who worked on what episode to identify animators and their works!

#one piece #opgraphics #gif #anime #op animation thesis

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writemekpop · 4 years

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Grown Ups | Park Chanyeol

Pairing: Park Chanyeol x Reader

Summary: You can’t stand your ex Chanyeol, but you put up with him for the sake of your son. Today, it’s your son’s birthday, and you’re taking him to visit his dad. Can you and Chanyeol act like grown ups for one day, or will there be flames?

Genre: Ex-Husband!Chanyeol, Parents AU

Word count: 1.4k

Gif source

“I can’t wait to see daddy! I wonder what birthday present he got me…” Your five-year-old son Robin jumps up and down in excitement, clapping his chubby hands.

“I’m sure it’s going to be great, sweetie,” you reply, but your smile doesn’t reach your eyes. “Now don’t forget to hold mummy’s hand when we cross the road.”

Your face is a cheery mask. You can’t let Robin see the frustration that grows every time you see your ex-husband Park Chanyeol… the man who unfortunately happens to be the father of your child.

You hate to admit it, but Robin is the spitting image of his father: bouncy black curls, wide shiny eyes and adorably large ears.

Robin runs up to the peeling front door of Chanyeol’s house and knocks excitedly. He hops around and peers in through the letter box. “Daddy it’s me! Let me in!”

You walk up behind your son, blood already boiling at the fact that Chanyeol is making him wait on his birthday.

You knock on the door as well, but get no response. God, you could just kill Chanyeol – he promised he would never miss Robin’s birthday again. Well, that’s what he said the year before. And the one before that.

You ring Chanyeol’s mobile twice, but each time it goes straight to voicemail. Typical.

You take a deep breath and crouch down in front of your son. The last thing you want to do is disappoint him. “Baby, it looks like daddy’s not in. It’s… it’s mummy’s fault,” you lie. “I got the timing wrong.”

Robin’s eyes begin to glisten, and he pouts his pink bottom lip out. Your heart lurches. You’re going to kill Chanyeol when you see him.

Suddenly, the front door flings open and Chanyeol leaps out onto the porch. “Robin!” he bellows, large arms outstretched.

“Daddy!” Robin squeals, jumping into Chanyeol’s arms, his disappointment long forgotten.

Chanyeol nods in your direction. “Sup, Y/n?”

You glare at your ex-husband. “Where the fu… fudge were you Chanyeol?”

Chanyeol just rolls his eyes before turning his attention back to squishing Robin’s chubby cheek. “How are you, buddy? This is a nice surprise!”

“Mummy got the timing wrong,” Robin rolls his eyes at his father. Where did he learn that?

“The timing of what?” Chanyeol asks, raising his brows at you.

“Have you forgotten, daddy?” Robin asks forlornly.

You step in. “Of course not, Robin. Daddy’s only joking. He knows it’s your birthday.” You stare at Chanyeol, praying he’ll understand.

You watch as realisation dawns on Chanyeol’s face. His mouth falls open, and he flashes you an incredulous stare.

“G-gotcha!” he says to Robin, just a little too loudly. “Did you really think daddy would forget your birthday? Silly boy! Why don’t you go inside and I’ll bring your present.”

Chanyeol sets Robin down. The birthday boy runs into the house, his tiny feet pattering on the cracked tiles.

“God, Y/n, why didn’t you remind me?” Chanyeol jabs at you, frowning.

“I shouldn’t have to remind you every fucking time about your own son’s birthday! It happens on the same day each year, ya know?”

Chanyeol opens his mouth with a retort, but Robin’s laughter from the living room distracts you both.

“You better have a present for him,” you warn, following Chanyeol inside.

“Aright, woman! I’ll think of something, jeez.”

Your heart thaws a little when you see Robin sitting politely on the frayed couch, his little hands clasping his cherry red cheeks. He’s positively bursting with excitement.

You shudder at the crisp packets and empty beer cans stuffed between the sofa and the wall.

“Please can I have my present now, daddy? Mummy got me a digital camera!”

“Well…” Chanyeol says, digging into the pocket of his jeans. “My present is waaay better than a stupid camera.”

“Wait for it…” Chanyeol roots around his pocket for a good minute, tongue sticking out his mouth with concentration. You watch Robin’s face slowly light up in anticipation.

“Here!” Chanyeol holds his palm out in front of Robin. When you see what he’s holding, your eyes nearly pop out of your skull. Sitting in his palm is nothing but a creased, sweaty pack of chewing gum.

Still, your bright-eyed boy takes the gum from his father’s hand and looks at it carefully. “Is this special gum, daddy?”

“T-that’s right son, it’s magic gum… I’ll show you why later,” Chanyeol replies.

Robin jumps into Chanyeol’s arms and buries his face in his soft sweater. “Thank you, daddy! I love it!”

Your heart nearly breaks at your son’s innocence. You can’t stand Chanyeol anymore, but you’ll do anything to keep your Robin believing that his father is Batman for as long as you can manage.

“Daddy told me he has another present coming for you in the post,” you say.

“Yay!” Robin squeals. Chanyeol sits down with Robin in his lap. “Is it more magic stuff, daddy? I love magic! Uncle Baekhyun knows magic too, he’s been showing me his tricks!”

Chanyeol shoots you a dirty look. “Oh… so Baekhyun’s been coming over, I see.”

Chanyeol lowers his voice so only you can hear. “You can’t keep your legs shut can you, Y/n? You just have to go after my friends.”

“Oh, shut up,” you retort. “Tell that to all the women you screwed behind my back when we were still together.”

Chanyeol just scowls. You’re both so caught up in arguing that you don’t notice Robin is standing in front of you with his new camera in his hands.

“Mummy, daddy, I want to take a picture of you together!”

“I don’t think that’s a good idea, buddy,” you say, instantly.

“Pretty pleeeaaase,” Robin whines.

You and Chanyeol look at each other for a moment and nod. The only thing you have left in common is your love for your son. Surely you can sit through one picture together…

“Daddy, sit next to mummy and put your arm around her!”

“Alright, bossy boots,” Chanyeol says, sitting down beside you.

Chanyeol avoids your gaze as his large arm comes to rest on your shoulder. His fingers subconsciously trace patterns across your skin as you both pose for your son.

You can’t help but notice the faint blush that tinges Chanyeol’s cheeks when he realises that he’s been stroking your bare skin. He silently retracts his fingers.

After a few failed attempts and a couple of thumbs in the way, Robin finally manages to snap the picture he wants.

“All done,” Robin says, yawning and rubbing his eyes.

“Okay darling, it’s time for us to go home.” You sweep your son up into your arms and pat his head.

“I had the best time with you and daddy,” Robin mumbles, before drifting asleep on your shoulder. Calm washes over you.

Chanyeol disappears into the next room and returns holding a fluffy purple knitted blanket. He drapes the blanket over Robin’s body and rubs his back gently.

“I didn’t realise you still had this,” you say, nuzzling your cheek slightly into the blanket.

“It was the first thing we ever bought together, how could I throw it away?” Chanyeol says, scratching his head bashfully.

“Do… do you remember how Robin used to cling to it when he was a baby?” you ask, smiling at the memory.

“Of course… He really is the best thing in the world, isn’t he?” Chanyeol says softly.

You nod, gazing into Chanyeol’s deep chocolate eyes which are the exact shade as Robin’s.

“Well…” you say, clearing your throat. “We really should get going now.”

Chanyeol watches silently as you walk out the door and head down the driveway, Robin still fast asleep in your arms.

Just as you reach the gate, Chanyeol calls your name.

You turn to face him. He’s leaning against the door frame, looking almost… sentimental.

“I’m sorry we always fight, Y/n.” he calls from the door. “I don’t tell you enough, but I think you’re doing an amazing job with Robin.”

You smile. It’s times like this when you remember why you fell in love with Chanyeol in the first place.

You walk away with your heart just a little bit warmer.

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teacup-tyrant · 3 years

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SHADOW & BONE REVIEW: EP 1

HELLO.

So let's get the assholery out of the way: I have a master's in arts critique (specifically film, dance, and fashion) and these are my Very Important Educated Thoughts.™ Just kidding. They’re not important. They're only educated. Sort of. I used to do the journalism but now I only write for funzies.

These are all my reactions, thoughts, and culturally-influenced tidbits I noticed (because that is my jam). We'll talk about communist propaganda, we'll talk about transitional editing in film, we'll talk about historical dress translated to costume, we'll fangirl over our favorite moments and be sarcastic over everything else.

Let's ROLL:

- first thing's first, was that a goat on the bridge?! WAS THAT A GOAT. Is this foreshadowing already? Or did we just see the well known-star of the show already, somebody hold me

- This kind of happy intro to character backgrounds music is kind of throwing me. (This is the only time I reacted kind of meh in the sound dept.)

-Ok, that shot of the camera panning up the cane is sexy af. You know, the one from all the gifs we've been staring at the last month. We get to The Cane before you get introduced to Kaz even. Bc it’s important. I like that.

- Omfg when Kaz goes into the office and the DeKappel is hanging framed in on the wall... I am screaming

- "I only invest in one of a kind, she isn't like you. No one is." Easy does it, now

- Kaz is looking directly at the camera, directly at usssss ahhhhhh it’s kind of scary, I love it. It comes off as rather threatening, no?

- You can FELL when I scene transition is coming because they're doing that pan in pan out camera movement on a similar object, for example the painting of the fold to the actual fold, or the same motion a character is making. Takes me back to my true love and oscar winning editing team on Lord of the Rings. Imagine hadving 5 plot lines in different locations running at once (in RotK. lol at the editors, good luck making it all make sense

- Goddamn racist Ravkens, yeesh (x1)

- ZOYA. WOAH. Combing on a bit heavy with Mal, are we?

Stop talking about tumbling grisha, Mal, you’re making Alina feel worse hahah

- OH SHIT BOYS, IT'S PEKKA ROLLINS. He doesn't have a green coat, but he does have a heavy Scottish accent, so that's nice

- Alina's whole unit just got sent into the fold, ohhhhoho fuck that means everyone that died is her fault. ooooops.

- God, the skiff is just so cool. that shot of it right after they unfurl the sail is beautiful, jfc I am loving this. And the MUSIC and then a cut to silence and creaking ships noises and distant volcra. I did a presentation on sound editing in school and this reminds me of some moments from another Oscar-winning sound editing team that worked on Master & Commander

- Ship graveyard! Good way of establishing how deadly this place has been without saying it. And also the dead trees is pretty cool, I always thought of the Fold as just empty nothingness but the trees make it creepier

- A KAZ SMIRKY SMIRK!

- Casual showing of guns, always necessary

- I love how they use heartbeat sounds in the background when heartrenders are around

- I’m just really loving the sound editing, can you tell. It’s really important.

- Awaaa Inej being all like "omg saints! a sun summoner, wow, so holy!"

- OMFG HE SHOT HIM IN THE HEAD and lol Kaz doesn’t flinch

- Kaz really does stare right at the camera a lot and it’s kind of unnerving, which it probably is supposed to be, bc it’s establishing him as a no-nonsense boss, like this guy will fuck you up and be emotionless about it

- Hold on, did I miss who this mustache guy is even and why he wants Alina? I need to pay better attention

- Is the credits song the Ketterdam theme? I love me some good bouncy cello

...and that's the end of episode 1. Beautiful. Amazing. Word-building. Good sounds. Stay tuned for ep2.

ep1 | ep2 | ep3 | ep4 | ep5 | ep6 | ep7 | ep8

#pocketreviews #shadow and bone #shadow and bone spoilers #shadow and bone reviews #six of crows #kaz brekker #alina starkov

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inkbloodpaperandbone · 4 years

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My mum's reactions to 9-1-1 episode 3, Next of Kin

Opening scene, dad attempts to look cool getting into bouncy house: Mum: "There's a reason adults shouldn't jump around in those."

The wind picks up taking the bouncy house with it: "Oh god it went flying! How strong are the winds in L.A.? Shit!"

The team arrive, hen and buck rescue the kids from the cliff: "Oh thank God the kids are fine. Although I wasn't actually expecting them to kill off little kids this isn't game of thrones, sex scenes aren't nearly naked enough." Omg mum 😂

Athena finds May has overdosed: "Probably the scariest thing that a parent could ever go through." These scenes are very hard on my mum.

I don't feel comfortable writing what she says about this part of the episode because of how personal it is.

Chimney pretending to cook take out got made her laugh. Which is good since the last scenes made her cry. Mum already doesn't like Tatiana:

"Why does Chimney lie about his job to his girlfriend? Oh, to impress her that's sad."

Chimney purposes: "Oh no he's not is he, oh dear."

Buck and Hen playing video games at the station: "I used to love watching you and it brother play games together. Until you started fight of course."

She says "fight" like I had a chance against my brother who's been bigger and heavier than me since I was 10 and he was 8. He used to push me off the sofa and sit on my back until I'd give him the controller, the cheat!

Bobby's ranting to Chimney about faking himself for Tatiana: mum nodding along to what Bobby says, "He's right."

Chimney storms off: "That is not going to end well." My mum is clearly psychic 😉

Chimney driving angry down the motorway, dodging cars and overtaking the truck: "There is going to be in an accident isn't he?"

The truck runs straight into the back of Chimney's car: "Ha I knew it." 😅

The team arrive on scene and the camera pans out to show Chimney pinned to his seat with the rebar through his head: Jesus! WTF!? That so gross ugh."

Chimney's brain surgery: a lot of grossed out noises.

You'd think having been a nurse and career my mum would be unfazed by blood and gore, she's dealt with the care of dead bodies, all the bodily fluids, broken bones and still even small cuts make her squeamish. I'll admit I'm having a lot of fun watching her gross out. I'm evil I know 😈

The families locked in the back of the truck storage unit and slowly dying in the heat: Some very choice swear words. This scene made her (and me) super mad.

Unfortunately last year in the UK around 39 migrants died in a truck like this after being left in an over crowded in an refrigerated trailer, the driver and several others have arrested for 39 counts of manslaughter.

Just the idea someone would leave people to die like that disgusts the both of us so much.

Hen taking down the driver when he tries to make a run for it had my mum cheering.

Abby phones Buck: "Why does he keep picking up on calls? Why doesn't Abby wait until he's not at work. Shouldn't she know it's potentially dangerous for him to get distracted whenever his phone goes off."

This gets me as well, like clearly in this scene he's not in the middle of a rescue but still, I think my mum's point stands.

Abby's brother trying to get her to put their mom in a care facility and abby talking to Carla later about wanting to keep her mum with her: As mentioned before my mum has worked with patients who have Alzheimer's and their families. She doesn't have much to say about Abby and her mum this episode only that both siblings have very valid arguments over their mother's care.

Final scene, the team visiting Chimney at the hospital: After the surgery scene mum's pretty relieved that Chimney didn't die and chokes up a little when Bobby takes Chimney's hand.

Final thoughts: pretty good episode and happy to see that the May and Athena cliffhanger from 1x02 didn't end tragically.

Mum is still pretty excited to keep watching so more reactions to come soon😊

(All GIFs above our my own)

#my mum's reactions #9-1-1 #1x03 #long post #I'm attempting to make more gifs for these #so hopefully they're not to terrible

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rkdaehwi · 5 years

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DUOS PERFORMANCE II PART I : PERFORMANCE

MGA5 contestant #5042 Sohn Youngjae SHARPSHOOTERS Performing Anything You Can Do (I Can Do Better) - Annie Get Your Gun Cast { 1:06 - 2:20 } + Love Never Felt So Good - Michael Jackson { 0:44 - 1:14 } female parts Partner: Kim Yugyeom @rkkyg Gif credit { Outfit in gif }

“ You gotta dance like there’s nobody watching ”

In a sense he supposed that it was more strange that there had been two people he knew personally who made it past the initial auditions, but by now the number of contestants had been thinned out and no one was left anymore. The surprise from two weeks ago had slowly subsided but it felt weird to have all these people around him who knew each other (what were the odds of that happening even? It was kind of crazy) while Eric himself was a loner. He was by no means an introverted person, but he didn’t even know where to start in socialising and interrupting other people’s conversations. In that aspect he thought it was pretty neat to get to know his fellow contestants -- after all it was a show preparing one for the trainee life and idol world in which one had to be able to work together with ones group mates.

A new week had come and honestly Eric had hoped that it wouldn’t just be a repeat of last, so it was a little disappointing to know that they had to do exactly the same again. Last year the group performances had at least been themed, but this time it felt a bit loose was perhaps the word he was looking for. They claimed that this was the greatest season yet, but Eric honestly failed to see it. Alas, he could do nothing but step up to the game and locate his new partner in Kim Yugyeom.

He had taken notice of the guy even if he had never spoken about him in interviews -- as a fellow male dancer there was no way he could have not at least paid a little attention to him, but their styles and preferences were vastly different, so it was easy to believe that the two were going to clash in their performance. But that only made it all the more fun. A challenge was always a welcome thing. As had it been a challenge when Yugyeom had supposed they choreographed the entire thing themselves to really show off their own style. Some might have thought it impossible to do such a feat in a mere week while also finding time to practice on the side, but the word impossible did not exist in Eric’s dictionary and he didn’t for a moment hesitate to agree, and eagerly at that. He was fairly new to coreographing, but Yugyeom helped him and directed him in the parts he was lacking and eventually their performance was finished.

Admittedly he had never watched the original musical that their first song was from, but it gave him a sort of vibe where two people were one-upping each other to try impress each other in a form of enemies turning to lovers trope. That was why he had suggested to follow up with a complete turn of events as a sort of continuation and finale to the performance and go all out on the love theme. It had also been his idea to add a small dramatic sequence in between the performances, and thankfully Yugyeom had welcomed it eagerly.

Arriving to the set he sat down next to his partner in crime and for some reason found that even though it seemed Yugyeom was one of the people who had other friends here, he seemed almost doting on him. Perhaps it was just his imagination though. But all the way through the performances the other’s attention kept switching to him to a point where it almost became too much. It made him feel like a little kid who needed to be taken care of, but he tried to tell himself that that wasn’t Yugyeom’s intention. Eventually it was their turn, and with bouncy steps he followed the older to the stage, and when they stood there side by side he rose his hands and pretended to fire off a gun with his fingers.

“Bang bang! Shooting for your heart, we are Sharpshooters!” he quoted together with his partner, with a huge grin spreading on his face. He had never imagined that Yugyeom would go along with something like that, but he had, and Eric was both amused and excited. If they were a group they had to have a group name and a greeting right? Right. That was just how it worked. It seemed like his partner even lived up to the role even more than Eric had first anticipated. “I’m Sohn Youngjae! Please take good care of us!” he chirped along as a follow up. There wasn’t much else to do than get into position, and as the song started Eric stepped into the centre of the stage with an expression that was ready to fight.

Anything you can do, I can do better!

Although it was just lipsync Eric praised the fact that he was good at English to be able to mimic the sounds with his mouth properly. Their performance was very dramatic and very expressive, so it was important that he didn’t for a moment lose his face. The jazzy steps were fun and the movements were something that put Eric’s flexible body into use, and most importantly he absolutely had a blast dancing their routine. As the first song came to a close, and Eric stepped in front of Yugyeom to pose before him their little mock argument began. Eric feigned yelling and gestured vividly before crossing his arms before his body and walking away with a very obvious huff. Then came the part where Yugyeom would draw him back in by grabbing his hand and pulling him closer.

Thus their second song began and their routine continued. This time expression wasn’t as important because the purpose of this part was simply to showcase a different style too and to put a close to the ‘argument’ and simply have the time of their lives together. Two people becoming one on stage even if it was only temporary. For even though they were rivals in this show, it didn’t change the fact that right now they were each other’s only ally and that if one did bad, so would the other. The music faded out and with it, Eric’s chest heaved slightly from the exhaustion of the routine but a huge smile was present on his lips as he waved to the judges and the cameras before making his way off stage.

As they were walking, Yugyeom placed a hand upon his hat and began ruffling his hair underneath which caused a whine to escape Eric. “Hyuuuung, not the hair!” he complained audibly trying to push the older’s hands away, but not really being fully upset. The euphoria of performing was still controlling his body, and at the compliment he started chuckling. “Job done,” he said forming finger guns again and pretended to blow off the fumes copying the older’s movements from earlier.

#ch: solo #rkmga5 #rkmga5duos2 #rkkyg

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hornyliverpudlianputz · 5 years

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The art of making The Monkees

I got an ask recently to do a post on the cinematography of The Monkees TV show. Well. I love an excuse to rant about all things film so here it is! (Thanks again for the ask anon!) To start. What is cinematography? Simply put, it is the art of film making. More specifically, it is all the work that goes into making each shot look exactly the way it needs to in order to convey the “artistic vision” of the director. Things like lighting, framing, focus, camera movement, frame rate, and filters. Everything shot with a camera has it. How does it apply to The Monkees? Well..

The Monkees, having started its run as a typical 60s sitcom, actually didn’t push a lot of cinematography boundaries. (Head is another story, but that is for a different post.) Towards the end of the second season it was starting to play around a lot with editing and writing, but not so much cinematography. That’s not to say the show didn’t have it, like I said everything shot with a camera has some amount of cinematography. So. What I can talk about are elements that The Monkees did use, because it has some great examples of some classic cinematography techniques.

Let’s do lighting first. Lighting is one of those things in film and TV that you don’t really notice unless it’s done badly, or if it’s very, very dramatic. Lighting tells us where to look in the shot, if it’s outside or inside, what the temperature is, and whether it’s day or night. Compare these two shots from inside the pad, facing the window: x x

In the first shot, it’s obviously supposed to be daytime while the other shot is clearly night. How do we know this? A combination of scenic design and lighting. The backdrop outside the bay windows has been changed in the second still to reflect a nighttime view. The lighting in the second shot is also much more shadowy and slightly dimmer. The first shot is very cleanly lit in its entirety, mimicking a room that is lit by a large bay window on a sunny California day. Then there’s this beautiful shot which has some thematic implications x:

Notice the shadows of the harp strings on Peter’s face. That could have been avoided by simply not lighting Peter directly from his right side, which means the fact that the shadows are there is deliberate. This is the point in the episode (”The Devil and Peter Tork” of course) where everyone realizes that Peter has apparently accidentally signed his soul away in order to play the harp. The vertical shadows on his face are not only ominous and unsettling, they also create an instantly recognizable image of bars, as in a cage or a prison.

Later in that episode during the “Salesman” romp we see some great examples of dramatizing the lighting using obvious color and glare. In fact, because of the crazy camera angles, we can actually see the lighting instruments being used on set x :

There’s also some great use of colored lighting for comic effect in “The Audition”, both when Peter has “hay fever” and when he is “sea sick” x

Notice how the other boys are arranged around Peter so that none of them get in the field of the colored light. You can also see some spill over from the light on Peter’s shirt, and obviously his hands are affected when he puts them near his head.

Now let’s talk filters. These can be used on either lighting instruments or the camera itself. The boys actually do a short bit with some of the lighting frames (these include both texture and color filters) in one of the “minute short” interviews, watch here. I’m going to discuss camera filters here, which are essentially the same thing except when used they cover the entire shot evenly rather than affecting only the area hit by the light. (For example, in the above bit with Peter a light filter was used, not a camera filter.)

These are a little trickier to spot as any color filter over a camera is designed to be subtle, but they do use a texture filter in “The Chaperone” and it’s in a really classic way (I can’t get a good source on this gif, but it’s not mine):

Notice how the image is a little “fuzzy”? It’s not because the camera is foggy, here’s a shot from immediately before this (same problem as above, no good source but not my gif):

See? No fog. That texturing technique was very commonly employed in the 60s to “soften” a shot or make the mood more romantic, usually when a very pretty girl had just entered the room and a main character sees her. Here the point being made is that the General is instantly smitten with “Mrs. Arcadian” because he thinks “she” is very pretty. The cinematographer used a camera filter to cue the audience with a technique they would have been familiar with to hammer the joke home.

Camera movement. This covers a few new terms so you get a vocab lesson with examples! A “static” shot is one where the camera is still. It’s not moving at all, it is simply focused in one area and all the action happens within that frame. This and the next type are probably the most commonly used shots in The Monkees. (Like I said, they didn’t push too many boundaries on this front.)

A “pan” or “panning” shot is one where the camera is stationary, but swivels from side to side on a fixed point, usually following a subject walking across a room.

“Tilting” is doing the same but vertically rather than horizontally. So the camera is in a fixed position but “tilts” up or down to follow something that would otherwise move out of frame.

A “tracking” shot is one where the whole camera moves, usually on a dolly or tracks (hence the name) to follow action sideways. This is typically used in large areas, like when a subject is moving down a street. (In this case, the Monkeemobile)

A “dolly” shot is similar to a tracking shot, but instead of moving the camera side to side a dolly is used to “push in” or “pull out” on the subjects. This is used in place of zooming in/out.

A “crane” shot is one where the camera is physically put on a crane to lift it either away from or towards the subject. This can also substitute for zooming in/out.

This variant on a crane shot was accomplished by putting Davy on the crane with the camera which is both hilarious and cool:

Here’s a behind-the-scenes picture that makes it more obvious x:

Finally there is the “handheld” camera which is exactly what it sounds like. A camera person will physically handle the camera, usually on their shoulder, and track the subject themselves. This is typically gives a jerky, “homemade” feel to the shot. The Monkees uses this technique frequently during romps or in the early episodes during dancing scenes, because the bouncy shot makes the viewer feel like they are being jostled.

Next we have framing and/or focus. I’m putting these two in the same category, partially because they are very similar and partially because I don’t have any good examples of The Monkees actually “using” focus. Focus, firstly, is exactly what it sounds like. Focus determines which object or subject is in “perfect” focus and which are in “acceptable” focus. Obviously this affects exactly what the viewer is looking at in a frame. When the focus is “raked”, it’s visibly changed from the foreground to the background, or vice verse. Like I said, The Monkees don’t really play with focus that much, so I’ll leave it alone.

Framing, on the other hand, is a different story. Framing is also exactly what it sounds like, it’s how ever the shot is “framed” in terms of what subjects are in it. Usually it’s characters who are talking or reacting to events. But framing also includes zooming in/out, and The Monkees frequently used this for comically dramatic effect.

Here, for example, in “Too Many Girls” it’s used as a gag reveal:

Or in “Royal Flush”:

In this bit of course, Mike zooms himself in:

There is also a “tilted” frame, which is different than a tilt shot. A tilted frame is where the camera is physically tilted so the frame is on a diagonal. This is usually used to create a sense of unease or “unreality”. The Monkees use it in “Captain Crocodile” when they do the “Frogman and Tadpole” bit, to emphasize the point that this is completely fictional within The Monkees universe. x

Last but certainly not least, frame rate. The Monkees plays with this quite a lot, especially early on, so it’s a big one to cover. Frame rate describes how many frames (the still images on a film strip) are moving past the “eye” per second. The film standard is 24 frames while the TV standard is 30. (I have no idea why they are different.) Because the industry standard will always be to play the film at a rate of 30 fps, a camera person can speed up or slow down the end result by shooting fewer or more frames.

This is called “undercranking” or “overcranking” in reference to when film cameras were hand operated with a crank. When a shot is “overcranked” deliberately, you end up with more than 30 frames captured per second of real time. When this is played back at a 30 fps rate, you see the results in slow motion.

The opposite, “undercranking”, means that you have captured less than 30 fps in real time. When an undercranked scene is played back at a 30 fps rate, the image speeds up. Sound familiar?

Now. Having said all of that I do need to make a point about The Monkees specifically. Cinematography in general is basically the reason that “blocking” exists. (Blocking is essentially choreography for not-dancing, it is worked out beforehand exactly where actors will stand/move within a scene and at which cue they move on.) Blocking needs to happen mostly so that lighting and camera movement can be planned in advance. Lighting especially, shadows in the wrong place can really mess up a shot, but also if the specific type of camera equipment to do a certain shot isn’t on set, the shot can’t be done. The camera operators also need to know who their mark is and how/where they will be moving so they can properly do their job.

This means that physical improvisation is very, very difficult to actually do. Verbal improvisation is no problem, but when an actor is moving around unpredictably it takes a damn good camera operator to keep them in frame. Not to mention the fact that lighting is now a total crapshoot. But, you may say, The Monkees is known for improvisation! Correct. What happened with The Monkees is basically “planned improvisation”. What I mean is, the camera/lighting crew went into the scene knowing there would be improvisation. I assume this was typically employed during romps, but who knows in the second season.

There was an interview (or maybe commentary I don’t remember) where someone talked about Micky letting the crew on set know that he was going to be improvising during that scene. He told the lighting crew to lights the set as evenly as possibly, and the camera crew to be ready to follow him “up”. I believe it was actually “The Chaperone” romp because it’s the only one I can think of where Micky goes climbing around like a maniac. And when you look at some of it, it’s clear that the camera person was having a little trouble following him around.

Watch here when he jumps off the balcony:

You can see when he lands the camera person overshoots slightly and Micky goes partially out of the top of the frame.

Compare to this scene from “Monstrous Monkee Mash” when Mike falls down the stairs, which was likely scripted (if it’s not I am very impressed with the camera operator) x:

The only time that Mike goes out of frame is when his leg gets caught on a step, which was likely an accident. The camera moves exactly to a set point that was probably planned in advance. In the second gif, Mike stands abruptly but remains nearly perfectly in frame. Again, probably because it was planned in advance.

But I digress. Point is, even though The Monkees didn’t experiment too heavily with cinematography in their heyday, they did put it to excellent use both practically and comically.

#the monkees #cinematography #long ass post #gifs not sourced are mine #finally got this done #giphy stopped loading?#like halfway through?#so now half the gifs are shitty quality #sorry every one

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blu-b · 6 years

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Trying again to post my Ragnarok blabbering....

Let’s try and see if tumblr still thinks it has too many paragraphs. If so, I shall split it into two. Reminder that this is just me spewing out everything that bothers me because I actually have so desperately few Thor(ki) pals on tumblr that I'm basically jumping on any opportunity to actually talk to someone about it. Which is why you precious few who commented are now getting the full broadside of my entire jumbled misery. I apologize in advance. You really don't have to read all of it. I’m also not looking for a grand discussion or anything. I just need to get it out of my system.

I respect that there are people who liked the movie, and I don't mean to spoil it for anyone else, so what I'm going to say here is all just a very personal, subjective impression that is by no means anything else but an opinion. Also I feel kind of stupid because the film has been out for a year and...yeah well.

On we go.

upstartpoodle replied to your post “I’ve finally seen Thor: Ragnarok (yes yes, I’m late to the party, I...”

I haven't seen it since I knew from the various spoilers I've seen that it wasn't really my cup of tea, so I can't really comment about the film as a whole, but I've seen a lot of complaints from other people about inconsistent characterisation, too many jokes, dropping the ball on plot points established in the previous films, etc. There's an increasingly long post that keeps cropping up on my dash about it.

calicoskatts replied to your post

I enjoyed it but for me it was jsut another entertaining movie from Marvel but nothing particularly interesting. I thought I was watching Guardians of the Asgardians personally. I’ve been put off from Marvel over the last bit tbh, so maybe that’s why? Like I said, I enjoyed it but I wasn’t wowed or anything.

nelioe replied to your post

*raises hand* I agree, I too thought the movie was awful

miusmius replied to your post

I honestly loved it!

hiko73 replied to your post

What? The movie was amazing from beginning to end, imho....I feel at a loss why you hated it so much.

So, before I say anything, I need to explain that I basically knew the film's plot from gifs and Youtube clips before I watched the DVD, although I didn't know all of it. I already thought some of the scenes sucked big time from the snippets I had seen (Get help, the obedience disk), but actually there were a few that I thought were bad and that turned out rather good in the movie. I’ll come to those in a minute.

So, I think seeing the movie in its entirety for the first time was what did me in. Really, my brain hurt after the end credits rolled off the screen, and I felt like brainwashed. I mean, I knew it was different, and loud, and colourful, and that’s not what I’m having a problem with. It’s rather…a conglomerate of things that just rub me the wrong way.

I’m not mentioning the inconsistent characterisation and the many loose threads that never get cleared up sufficiently (an entire fandom has been waiting for an explanation of how Loki survived Svartalfheim! I had expected it to be a major plot point early in Ragnarok, but it wasn’t even mentioned apart from ‘I thought you were dead’. Well yes, thanks Thor, me too. I’d like to know how he managed not to be dead!).

I’ll also not mention obvious plotholes because well, it’s Marvel we’re talking about, so things like that are expected, and I’ll neither mention obvious flaws on the technical side (too many rapid cuts, weird camera angles or frames) because artistic liberty and all. What does get on my nerves is how almost any serious scene is broken up by something ‘funny’. No two characters can have a quiet talk for two seconds before some joke is cracked that does or does not fit the situation. It’s…tiresome. Especially since most of the jokes aren’t really funny.

Here's a thing: a have a weird humour, I Hate comedy with a capital H, and I despise nothing more than random comedic slapstick elements in an otherwise serious film. Why for heaven's sake can no one make a serious movie anymore? Argh. This film is literally titled "The end of the world" and yet there's a joke at every corner, and no it isn't a black-humoured jab at fate, it's the kind of knee-slapper that's only funny for half the time it takes, and not again afterwards. It makes me angry. Comedy has to be precise and on-point to work. There's a lot of well-placed comedy in the previous Thors and the Avengers; comedic elements that are funny even when you watch the scene a second and a third time. Now, Taika Waititi takes comedy to an entirely new level that isn't necessarily one I like. I also need to say that although I don't know him personally, he comes across as a very taxing person, taxing in a sense that his constant good spirits and giddiness and sort of bouncy energy would definitely wear out my social batteries if I had to be around him all the time. It wore out Tom Hiddleston's, as we can see in several behind the scenes footages where Taika takes to fooling around in front of the camera while poor Tom would just like to get on with his work.

Anyway, back to the movie. Of the major things that rub me wrong is that it does have a very problematic attitude towards violence.

It is rated for a viewing age 12 and up in my country, but I sure as hell would not let my children watch it. There are scenes that come down to nothing but random violence for…well, not even the sake of anything. Hela just skewering Fandral and Volstagg like that? What for? If it’s meant to establish an emotional connection and show just how dangerous Hela is, it fails spectacularly, because it is not given enough time, or enough emotional room. It’s just ZAP and they’re dead; if you don’t look closely you don’t even realise it’s them because they've never had a moment to being reintroduced. Half of the audience has probably already forgotten who they were.The scene with Hogun is gruesome as is the slaughtering of an entire army, and it does nothing whatsoever in terms of significance. Later on, we see many other characters just resorting to brainless mass shootings and seemingly enjoying the heck out of it. Valkyrie, Skurge, you name them. There's a very problematic message in having a character stumble off an enormous spaceship, having them fall off the gangway drunk because it looks cool, and then proceed to mow down a bunch of innocent and mostly unarmed scrappers on a trash planet.

Now, I don’t have a problem with violence in general. I just don’t like the way it is presented here.

There were a few scenes that were actually good.

Thor and Dr. Strange for example, even though the plot could easily have done without that sideline, and Benedict Cumberbatch is also only pouring 50% of his effort into his performance - still, it’s solid, classy acting.

The scenes between Thor and Loki on Midgard in the very beginning stand out because both Hemsworth and Hiddleston are given enough time to actually act out their characters' emotions without being interrupted by a joke. I really liked the dynamics here and I wish the film would have picked up on that course.

Some of Hela’s scenes where a little background on her character is revealed were good as well, but overall I thought Cate Blanchett was alternating between gross overacting and doing minimal duty as per contract. It would have been nice to have her on screen some more, and learn a bit more about her past and her motivation. Revenge for being imprisoned by Odin? Sounds familiar. Hela, darling, how about a little talk about that with Loki over tea and biscuits? I'm sure the two of you could have shared some experience. (Also major kudos to Loki for NOT tearing into Odin like "Aha, so throwing your kids into a cell seems to be your standard educational measure, dad.")

Anthony Hopkins was awful. He has never been good in any of the previous films, one of my main reasons for my major dislike of Odin, and I don't know if he's getting senile or what, he just was really really bad in this one. It only adds to the awful characterisation of Odin altogether. The last straw was his dealing with the Hela situation: "There's this threat that is coming for Asgard, born of one of my own mistakes, there's nothing you can do about it and I don't give a shit so bye and good luck, I guess." Good thing he disappeared, or I would personally have crawled into the TV and shoved the old man off the cliff.

So, what little else I liked was actually any scenes with Heimdall - I wasn’t a big fan of Heimdall, ever, but he seriously kicks ass here, not only because of superb acting on Idris Elba's part but also because his scenes aren’t interrupted by hectic cuts or off the mark jokes.

Surprisingly, Skurge’s story arc was interesting as well. Now, I don’t like Karl Urban - you've probably figured out by now that there isn't an awful lot of people that I like. Basically I think his character is rather unnecessary - why not use one of the established characters? Why not let Fandral or Hogun be torn between right and wrong? Anyway, Karl does play him well and I see why a character like that would be in there (his death though? More random, unnecessary violence).

Bruce Banner / The Hulk really went on my nerves the entire time. The fight between he and Thor is well choreographed, but the entire sequence is too long *yawns* Some of the stuff with Thor in Hulk’s room is actually funny, but that was that.

And then Loki. Please prepare yourself for a rant of epic proportions.

Now, I do admit I'm biased because I love Loki; I've loved him in Norse mythology ever since I was a child. I went to study Old Norse for a bit mainly because of the Edda and Loki, and I love what Hiddleston has done with the character in these films. I also get that this is Thor: Ragnarok and not Loki: Ragnarok and that he is a supporting character just like all the others.

That said, in the few scenes that he actually has - you don't really need Loki for what he does. Any random side character could have stolen the ship's codes, or placed Surtur's crown in the flame. That last bit was a bow to the original myth (and the comics, I suppose) where it's really Loki who releases Surtur and causes Ragnarök (which is why I -love- the 'saviour' scene because it's a reference to Loki arriving at the scene of the final battle at the helm of the ship of the dead, called Naglfar, in Norse myth). But - in the film, all in all, you don't really need Loki for all that. Valkyrie could have done it, or Heimdall, or Skurge for that matter (what a heroic plot that would have made for him!).

And there's more to it than just lamentably little of Loki in this film. The entire film, to me, seems like a deliberate attempt to ban Loki to the background, give him as little screentime as possible, and make him look ridiculous altogether. Not only is his character basically replaceable in what he does, no -

(I've seen quite a lot of the BTS stuff in advance, so this plays into it as well.)

Let's start with the small things:

- There's hardly any close-ups of Loki in the entire film, Norway being the one great exception (consequently, he rocks the scene).You can always see him do something in the background, but the camera is never close enough to pick up clearly on any emotions or anything. Best example is the sofa scene at the Grandmasters'. If that was shown correctly, you would be able to read the entire course of the fight from Loki's face - there's glee, there's worry, there's schadenfreude, there's hope and admiration and anger and frustration and everything you can possibly imagine he goes through, but we are shown only mushed images of it. The entire dragging long battle between Hulk and Thor would have been way more interesting if more of Loki's facial expressions had been cut into it.

- Basically all he's good for is delivering cues for Thor and being there as a projection screen for Thor's heroism.

- The camera always seems slightly out of focus; Loki is there but he's not, somewhere at the back or to the side. Even when he's meant to be in the picture, the camera frame is just this little bit out of focus or he's being filmed at a weird angle.

- Weird angles. It's a signature thing for Loki in this film. He's being filmed from behind, above, below - now don't get me wrong, it's a very interesting artistic device - and the scene where he appears before the grandmaster, filmed through the transparent floor is a masterpiece in terms of camera angle - but when it's 80% of these frames and the rest is 15% hovering in the background and 5% good, clear close-ups, it conveys a message about the filmmaker's attitude towards this character - and in Loki's case, this message is not doing him any favours.

- More weird stuff: time frames. As I said above, you only ever see Loki doing unimportant stuff. Sitting around talking to the Grandmaster's cronies, getting "captured" on purpose, trying to get through to Thor. We don't see him doing any kind of stiff like Thor does, nothing "heroic", we don't even see him do any significant amount of magic. The only heroic moment he has, at the very end, is again botched by off-kilter dialogue ("I'm not doing get help" just sounds soooo out of place at this moment) and weird framing. Like, Thor gets all these super-cool, physical fighting scenes, full-on frontal, kicking and punching the shit out of everyone. Again, I get that this is Thor: Ragnarok, and we also have the Hulk and Valkyrie who need their hero moments. But we do know that Loki is just as good a fighter as everyone else, he fights differently, but he's very capable of defending himself and others, as seen in Dark World. In Ragnarok, he's right there in the middle of the fight, but you never see him do anything. You see him close in on someone, cut, then you see him pull out a knife of a body or juggle his helmet or whatever, but never any real action that proves how capable he is as a fighter, not like Thor gets them all the time. You see him jump, and roll, and fall on his ass, or doing a pirouette and tossing his hair back afterwards. The focus is not on him doing his share of defending Asgard, but on how he's a weak and pathetic fighter (this post explains it with great visuals). The thing is, somewhat heroic moments have been filmed, but have been left out in favour of more ‘funny’ sequences.

- Talking about ridiculousness: There's a total of seven scenes where Loki falls on his ass, his face, or is somehow on the ground for some reason when it's totally not necessary. In comparison, in Dark World and Avengers, he was only ever on the ground when either defeated, or due to battle action, not just for shit and giggles.

The one at Dr Strange actually makes me wince from the sheer impact with which he hits the floor, bouncing back two feet high in the air (can’t find the gif right now, but he does), and everyone in the cinema laughs. Actually laughs, like this is some funny one-liner. Someone's dropping from the sky and hitting the floor real hard and y'all laugh? Like no, this ain't funny at all, not to me.

- What are these scenes actually good for? Why did the previous films set him up as a master magician who - as even Dr Strange says - is a force to be reckoned with, when everyone can just shove him to the ground like that? Why is nearly everyone suddenly more powerful than him?

- Shitty lines/shitty scenes: 'Safe passage through the anus'. Boy, it makes me cringe for poor Tom who actually had to say this shit out loud, or play stuff like the (thankfully deleted) portaloo sequence. Like, wow. I mean, I know I have a different type of humour from nearly everybody else, but this shit is just so not funny, and I really hate Taika Waititi for even including such lines and scenes in the script. I mean, I get that he favours Thor over Loki, but was that really necessary? It's so cringeworthy it makes my teeth hurt.

- (On a minor sidenote, can we talk about how it also speaks volumes that Hiddleston was given a costume that he can barely move in and that makes him visibly uncomfortable, yet no one gives a shit?)

To sum it up, I don't like how Ragnarok treats the character of Loki and ignores all of his potential in favour of cheap jokes. It says a lot if a script needs to make fun of one character in order to let its main character appear in a better light. Taika talks about how Thor's and Loki's relationship is at the focus of the film and how they finally get to resolve their problems. I'm sorry, but I don't see any of that. I don't see any brotherly moments or reconciliation or at least an attempt to make things right. And that brings me to the one character that I have the biggest problem with: Thor.

Now, the general consensus was that Thor grows, he learns, he takes up responsibility, he has this great character development that makes him into a better man. I don't see that. What I see is a man who uses and abuses everyone in his path to achieve his own ends. He thinks he can command Valkyrie by repeatedly reminding her of her oath to the throne (the throne being a very prominent motivation for Thor, as we shall see) even when she's made clear that she gives a shit. When that doesn't work, he keeps trying to guilt-trip her, and when that doesn't work either, he fakes concern to get her attention, and once he has it, he cruelly pushes all the buttons that he knows will make her yield (basically telling her: you can either forget everything and rot on this planet, or you can do something about it and help me).

He manipulates Banner in the same way because he needs the Hulk for his Asgard mission. I mean, telling Bruce he prefers him over Hulk, and telling Hulk he prefers him over Bruce - I get that it's meant to be funny, but when you think about it, it isn't. It's manipulative as heck and it's exactly the kind of shit he always accused Loki of: lying to get his way.

And when it comes to Thor's interactions with Loki, he has not learned a single thing. He still treats Loki the way he always did: a scapegoat at worst, a convenience at best. In Norway, after Odin departs, Thor doesn’t hesitate to immediately accuse Loki of both Odin’s death and bringing about Hela as a consequence - as if Loki had any inkling that this was gonna happen. He wouldn’t be so stupid as to bring destruction to Asgard on purpose, remember it’s the only home he ever truly knew, so even if he did let things slip while posing as Odin, he surely never meant for Hela and Ragnarok to happen. He was just as surprised about the Hela revelation that Thor was, and as for Odin’s death - I doubt that this was intended. Especially since we still don’t know xactly how Loki got rid of Odin, but if he’d wanted to kill him, he could certainly have done so while Odin was weak and defenseless, but he didn’t - he just wanted him out of the way, not dead. Yet Thor completely assumes Loki is to blame for all of it, and as a consequence he falls back into his abusive treatment of his brother.

Yes, all I see is an abusive sibling who purposefully manipulates his mentally unstable younger brother. He knows what Loki has been through in the past; moreover, he has heard from Odin himself just how everyone in this family was played and lied to. He has seen what that did to Loki in the past. Thor knows exactly what's at the core of his brother's mind: the ambition to gain his family's approval, a fear of being abandoned, a deep-rooted sense of worthlessness and the ever-prominent desire to impress his older brother. Of course Loki sucks at saying all this out loud, and Thor probably doesn't know the full extent of the damage, but after the events of Avengers and Dark World he must at least have an inkling of what's going on inside that mind.

And yet he goes ahead and uses all of Loki's greatest fears against him:

"Our paths diverged a long time ago" - no they didn't, he just never let Loki catch up to him.

"It's what you always wanted" (never seeing each other again) - have you even paid attention to your brother, you big fool?

"But you, you stay the same", "you could be so much more" etc. - and being what, exactly? Thor's thrall, tagging along behind him, helping out when shit hits the fan, and otherwise keeping his mouth shut? To Thor, Loki is only acceptable when he behaves like Thor wants him to. He fails to see that it's Loki who's forced to change more than anyone else. He was forced to change almost first thing after being born, from a Jötun baby to an Aesir one just to please his new father. He's constantly forced to change to adapt to everyone's expectations: Odin's, Frigga's, Thor's own. And when he refuses to play along, he's the one at fault.

There are two scenes in Ragnarok in particular that I find hard to watch in respect of Thor's abusive qualities. First, the elevator scene /Get Help.

Loki tells Thor no three times, he even gives him a reason why he doesn't want to do Get Help (which, considering Loki and his difficulties to express emotion, to Thor no less, is a big deal). I don’t know about y’all, but if my sibling told me they found something humiliating, which is several steps up the uncomfortable scale from "I just don't like it", I would never force them into it. Thor has to respect his brother's feelings and stop right there. A no is a no, even from Loki, even in this situation, especially considering how the entire move is nonsense after all - but Thor doesn't stop. He disrespects his brother's wishes, he ignores Loki's feelings, and what's worse, he even belittles him for it and laughs it off: No, for me it's not.

Yes, well, Thor baby, guess what? It's not always about you.

Even worse is the taser/obedience disk scene. It makes me physically cringe. And I will happily fist-punch everyone who tries to tell me it's just "a joke" or "friendly sibling barter" or wasn't "meant to hurt Loki" or that Thor "didn't know". I'm sorry, but nope.

Thor knows exactly what the obedience disc does, how it hurts. He has absolutely NO reason to use it on Loki. Loki has been playing along to his plans, he has even tried to offer Thor an explanation and a possible way out, but at that time Thor decided to throw a tantrum and sulk. Did he really think Loki would go through with that half-arsed attempt of collecting the 'reward' for Thor's capture from the Grandmaster, when just some hours before Loki has told Thor that he Grandmaster is a lunatic and that he basically wants to leave Sakaar just as bad as Thor does? Did Thor even listen??? Not to mention that there never was a 'reward' promised by the Grandmaster; instead a threat of public execution looms over Loki if he fails, so the reward he speaks of is possibly, once again, getting away with his life (while using the time this buys him to come up with a means of escape).

There was no reason at all to place the taser disc on Loki and leave him there - besides, Thor must have planned to use the disk even before he could be sure Loki was going to betray him, so it was Thor's plan all along to leave his brother there for whatever sick reason. How could he be so sure Loki would find a way to free himself? How could he be sure the rebels would be the ones to find Loki, and not the Grandmaster, or Topaz, or any of the hundreds of guards that swarm the place? Not to mention that time passes differently on Sakaar, so who knows how long Loki lay there writhing in agony. Thor walking off telling him "Good luck, I guess" while his brother is in obvious physical pain, and at the mercy of a crazy dictator, is the ultimate cruelty. But the throne is always more important, eh?

How could Thor be sure Loki would follow him to Asgard and come to his aid? Seriously, Loki could just have taken that ship and flown to the other end of the universe for all he cared. He's the only Asgardian on a ship full of refugees, he has no reason at all to help Thor, not after the taser disc and the general way Thor treated him, and YET he comes after his big brother because he desperately seeks Thor's approval, and Thor knew that and manipulated his brother into exactly this behaviour back there in the elevator.

And does Loki get a thank you? Not even! All he gets is a flippant "You're late" (everyone who tells me that's 'friendly sibling banter' again must have a truly fucked up relationship with their sibling), and then he's being ordered off to the vault to basically perform an act that could cost his life, without Thor even wasting a second thought to it. Well, we've already seen in Dark World how little Thor cares for Loki, as he just leaves his dead little brother behind to rot on a foreign planet. Doesn't even send anyone to come and collect the body or something. Doesn't even seem to care in Ragnarok whether Loki has made it out of Asgard alive or not (does he check frantically if his brother is aboard as they float off into space? No...but hey look, there's a throne, and people call him majesty, so all is grand).

Not even the "I'm here" scene does anything for their relationship. How often does Loki have to prove that he will sacrifice himself for Thor, and how often does he get nothing in return but accusations ("You faked your death!", "You killed our father!"), dubious compliments ("Maybe there's some good left in you") or at the most Thor throwing him a bone of approval: "Maybe you're not so bad after all" instead of "Thanks for saving our arses".

So, is this 'growing'? Is this 'mature'? Has Thor learned one single thing that makes him a better character? I don't think so. He takes up right where his father left, caring only for his throne, and manipulating his brother just the way Odin has always done. Yes, he became a little less uptight, and yes there's the new Thor who's sassy, nonchalant, doesn't give a fuck, doesn't let himself be played by his brother's schemes. I love the way Chris Hemsworth is playing this new Thor as opposed to the previous films. It's fun to watch him finally fill this role with a bit of spice. I really really like this new Thor. The problem is, I like how the new Thor is, but not what he does.

All in all, I think what happened was that Taika and Chris Hemsworth decided it was time to put the focus on Thor and make his character the center of the plot - which is fine, with it being Thor: Ragnarok and all, but why does it have to be at the expense of another great character that could have been used in so many other, different, better ways for the plot? I think they tried deliberately to shift a bit of Loki's coolness and cunning to Thor who, let's face it, has been a rather one-dimensional character in the previous films.

What I'm going to say now is unpopular, and probably mean, but it's the vibe I'm getting from day one since I started watching any Thor movies and BTS and interviews: All of this ties in nicely with Chris Hemsworth coming across as borderline jealous of Hiddleston and the success he gained for his portrayal of the Loki character, who was never supposed to steal Thor's spotlight. It's a shame Taika Waititi rolled with it in Ragnarok and actively added to this fiasco by way of bad filmmaking.

On a final personal note: Just yesterday before watching the film I wrote a little scene post-Ragnarok where Thor finally gets to understand everything that bothers Loki, and finds a way to comfort his brother in a very gentle, caring way, because that was what I understood Thor had finally learned: true compassion, the ability to understand, the motivation to go and make up for every time he was a shitty sibling in the past. I can't see that now, not anymore after watching this film, not after what Thor has been made into and how he treats Loki :(

I'm sorry this got so long. I'll disappear for a while now and see if I can manage to un-watch this movie. Thanks for reading/listening.

#upstartpoodle #calicoskatts #nelioe #miusmius #hiko73 #warning: long post #loki meta #thor meta #my thoughts on ragnarok #I'm blabbering #I just love Loki too much ok #probably because I can relate to him on so many levels #it's not even funny anymore #sorry

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thirdhostage · 7 years

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Night sky (Mark x TwinFemReader) fluff aghast

(( gif not mine - CUTIE ))

(A/n): lmao this request is weird and I love it.

Request: If you’re still doing request, do you think you could do a mark x female twin reader where they getting into a big fight so she leaves without telling anybody but eventually comes back and it’s clear that they’re both wrecks without their twin? Fluffy angst? Sorry, I just really like twin stuff ☺️

Warnings: Swearing and sadness and fluff and kill me

_____

Okay so sharing a house in general, is not always fun. Sharing a house with three other men, can be fun but also not fun. But, sharing a house with your twin brother, fun and terrible.

But, (Y/n) shared a house with them because her and Mark had always worked together on everything. The pair of them had started this channel together; with (Y/n) behind the scenes and Mark in front of the camera.

Yeah, sometimes it was stressful, especially for Mark. He had to maintain his public image all the time.

The two of them had each other though. They pair really were inseparable, as most twins are.

“Mark, I swear to fuck if you don’t put the seat down one more time, I’m selling your dick on the black market.”

Screaming things such as this across the house was likely common. All the person in question would do, though, is giggle and run away. Because she lives with several five year olds.

“Kill me now…” (Y/n) mumbled.

Walking down the stairs cautiously, she had split her path and strut into the large kitchen.

“Mark.” the girl growled.

Her fraternal twin was standing there next the the fridge with chica at his feet.

“Hmm??”

“Did you even hear what I just said?” she questioned harshly.

“Well yeah, but I was busy adoring Chica that I didn’t have time to care.” he joked.

(Y/n) rolled her eyes with venom soaking her usually sweet expression. This was also very common. Him not caring about a lot of things his twin had to say.

“Mark I’m serious. This is a small bathroom incident but it just further proves the point that you don’t listen.”

Her words didn’t register in his ears or even get past her lips it seemed. The brunette was too busy baby talking his dog.

All (Y/n) could manage to do was sigh dramatically. It pissed her off that he didn’t take the time to hear her, and the frustration showed.

“I’m going to get dressed.” the girl commented stiffly.

“Not that you care..”

As (Y/n) made her way slowly back up the stairs, Ethan passed her stride joyfully.

“Mooooring, (Y/n).” he called, stopping his bouncy walk to face her politely.

“Yeah.” she replied blandly.

She continued her walk of shame up the last four steps, and sauntered into her room. Ethan was left staring up the way (Y/n) had gone, visibly confused, borderline concerned.

Though it was the usual time for them all to share breakfast, the youtuber had lost her appetite.

“I’m not going to sit here and sulk, at least.” she mumbled.

Shuffling around her room, (Y/n)’s soft hum strung lightly in the air. The (h/c) haired girl collected a pair of clean jeans and blank shirt, throwing over a loose cardigan.

For the second time, she made her way down the stairs.

As (Y/n) walked into the kitchen, she took the liberty of rolling up her sleeves briefly. Stepping to the cabinet, she had gestured for Mark to move over.

“I’d ask, but I’m sure you wouldn’t hear me.” (Y/n) hissed.

Reaching up to grab herself a pale plastic cup, (Y/n) caught in the corner of her eye her brother mouth what she had just said, with crude facial expressions.

The girl wanted to sigh and apologize, but she thought it might be best to guilt trip him instead. (Y/n) had really wanted to make her point.

After obtaining her glass, she went to the fridge, passing by Ethan who sat at the table. He sat there, chewing his toast silently, feeling and seeing the tension but being shit scared to say anything.

The youtuber pried open the refrigerator, viewing its contents wearily.

Dramatically, she then twisted to face the blue boy.

“Do we not have any more milk?” (Y/n) asked kindly.

Ethan nervously smiled back up at the (e/c) eyed girl, shaking his head briskly with a mouth full of bread.

This time (Y/n) did sigh “I could have asked Mark, oh but he wouldn’t have given a shit.”

Mark rolled his eyes and aggressively threw up his arms.

“So what? Now you’re going to pout all fucking day because I made one joke?!”

(Y/n) actually wasn’t surprised by his outburst, in fact the (size) girl anticipated it.

“No, I’m trying to get a fucking point across! Because repetition is the only thing you see from me.” she scoffed.

Mark just clicked his tongue and stared at his twin intensely.

“That’s because I really couldn’t give less of a fuck what you say.”

“Yeah, I already know–” she began. At this point she had already had enough this. (Y/n)’s aim was to apologize now, but that sure wasn’t Mark’s.

“No, I mean I really don’t care. What you have to say means jackshit at the point, you aren’t actually valuable to any of my project’s whatsoever.” Mark spat “I’m honestly baffled why the hell you still live with me.”

That struck home immediately. Why was she living with him? Because… well this was what the two of them had worked for for a long time…

“…” (Y/n) stood there in silence.

Ethan took a second to stand up, his eyes already gone wide. He opened his mouth stiffly and said “I don’t think you should have said that.”

Mark’s knees felt as though they could give out at the calmest of movements. Before being able to actually say anything, the brunette opened and closed his mouth several times, looking between his sister and Ethan.

“(Y/n), oh my god… I’m…” he began, heartfelt hurting twisting his words.

“The sun is so bright…” came Tyler’s airy voice, entering the kitchen lazily.

He stretched backwards, and held in a yawn “Morning.”

The girl took this as any sort of cue to leave.

She stepped her way rigidly from the room. Mark could be heard yelling her name before Ethan called a loud “Wait!” but it wasn’t for (Y/n).

(Y/n) turned to face the stairs, staring up at them blankly.

She had made up her mind. Even in her dazed state, she knew for certain she did not want to be here of all places, right now.

❆ ❆ ❆

The girl had left. The house, I mean. She took her car from in front of the house and went away.

Of course she didn’t have any plans as to where she desired to go. Somewhere in the back of her mind, she thought she didn’t want to go anywhere at all.

So she drove and drove. And drove some more. Where (Y/n) ended up was half way across L.A, parked on the side of the road.

As she sat there breathing heavily, she was able to feel in her pocket, her phone vibrating. Not at all wanting to see any of the messages; she pulled it out against her better judgement.

- Loud blue boy: (Y/n)?

- Loud blue boy: I think you should come out of your room…

- Loud blue boy: wait r u even in your room??? :0

- Loud blue boy: Wait wait (Y/n) where are you?!

(Y/n)’s screen was lit up with messages from Ethan; they made her laugh a bit as she wiped at her eye.

The girl was happy she didn’t apply makeup this morning, noticing now that she had been crying most of the time she was driving.

A blunt sting cut through her upper chest. She didn’t want to be away from Ethan or Tyler. Especially not Mark. She had heard what Mark had said, but her mind wanted to know that he was lying. (Y/n) didn’t want to leave him…

“It’s been what, twenty minutes and I already miss them?” she mumbled softly.

Chancing her blurry eyes, (Y/n)’s gaze fell upon the digital clock in her car. It read in bright blue 4:58pm.

A quaint gasp bubbled from her throat, making (Y/n) sputter a bit in breath.

‘Six hours, what the hell.’ she thought.

Swiping furiously at her eyes once more, (Y/n) pulled off the side of the road and dealt out a most likely illegal U-turn. The youtuber began to go back the way she came, offering her silence a thick sigh.

❆ ❆ ❆

“I fucked up didn’t I?” Mark sniffed.

He was sat in the very middle of the kitchen, balling his eyes out, with a very not okay head.

“A little…” Tyler lulled. Tyler had been explained what had happened, and if he was honest, he was pretty disappointed in the two of them.

“Oh god, what if she never comes back?” Mark cries, heartbroken at the very thought “What if she just moves out and takes all her stuff with her and doesn’t say goodbye? Takes all her belongings, her memories.”

“I’m not sure that she would do that.” Ethan pats his back in an effort to console him.

Mark twists his head to look at the blue haired man and stares at him directly in the eyes.

“Ethan, I’m not ready to have her for once not take me.”

Now Ethan was the one heartbroken. He could see sufferable pain in Mark’s deep brown eyes.

“Hey, Mark, I believe that’s (Y/n)’s car pulling in…” Tyler spoke.

In an instant, the brunette had scrambled to his feet and with a deathly silence, watched the door.

Within a few seconds, it had opened quietly; softly. (Y/n)’s form slipped through the opening.

The current time was 11:23pm, from the moment that Mark saw (Y/n) in the doorway, to the second Mark had sprinted to her and snared her in a hug. The minute hand on the clock hadn’t even moved a millimeter between the two.

“Mark…” (Y/n)’s voice cracked. She wasn’t able to hug him back, or even close the door. Her twin had her arms confined under his own.

Mark also wasn’t able to say anything, it seems, other than ‘I’m sorry’ in repetition.

“Repetition, that’s all I ever hear from you.” (Y/n) laughed softly, sniffing a bit now and again.

The male raised his head to her words, showing her a sad, dopey smile. The stars in open night sky reflecting on his watery black eyes; making his sister smile back at him ten fold.

_____

(A/n): Boi this is so long I hated editing it. I can’t frickin read today, lordy

#markiplier imagines #markiplier fanfiction #markiplier #markiplier x reader #markiplier fluff #youtube x reader #youtuber #youtube #youtuber imagine #youtube fanfiction #youtuber x reader #jacksepticeye #ethan nestor #crankgameplays #tyler scheid #fluff #fanfic #aghast

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junker-town · 7 years

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‘The Bachelor’ episode 4 recap: The women shovel cow poop, Raven once beat up a doctor with a stiletto, Corinne is still a menace

They go to Nick’s hometown in Wisconsin and things get real.

Welcome to Week 3 of The Bachelor. We are recapping the show because The Bachelor is sports. Here is last week’s recap.

The Bachelor is technically a show about a man trying to find a woman. But you know what The Bachelor is really about? Women.

You know what else was recently about women? The women’s marches across the world that took place last weekend. You know who went? Nick Viall (is Nick Viall woke?)

Anything done peacefully in solidarity is something I can stand behind. Cheers to the women of the world! #equality #WomensMarch

— Nick Viall (@viallnicholas28) January 21, 2017

I went to a march, too, in D.C. (after I made Corinne’s nanny’s Cheese Pasta) with friends and friends of friends. The friends of friends were absolutely rad and are now my new best friends, so we are all watching The Bachelor together tonight.

First, though, we went out to dinner and drank several bottles of rosé, because that’s what you do before you watch The Bachelor, which I have renamed The Women’s March Part II. I lost track of time, which is how I found myself sprinting through a city at 7:58 p.m. one minute and 30 seconds after finishing a fairly large truffle-infused cheeseburger.

I’m a little worried I might throw up now, but I made it in time, so let’s do this.

(Side note: You guys should all totally watch the Facebook live show First Impressions tomorrow at noon where I recap The Women’s March Part II with Liz Plank of Vox and Rebecca Jennings of Racked. Here’s last week’s episode, in case you missed it.)

VANESSA DUNKING ON NICK, CONTINUED

The show opens with the second half of the conversation that Nick and Vanessa had at the end of last episode, where Vanessa was like “cut the crap, bad hombre, or I’m gonna go nasty woman on your ass.”

Nick — and I’m paraphrasing here — is essentially like, okay, yes, I get where you might be upset that I dry humped another woman in a bouncy house, but this show is hard.

Then Chris Harrison shows up for his requisite two minutes per episode. This dude must be the highest earner per-second of any white man in the nation, which is saying something. Also, he always looks like he’s wearing a shirt (usually gingham) that he ordered online and has just taken out of the packaging. I can almost smell the starch from here.

Chris Harrison tells the women there will be a rose ceremony, and I wonder if he has any other words in his vocabulary besides “ladies” and “rose” and “ceremony.”

CORINNE INTERVENTION, PART I

This part is kind of boring, but the women are basically like, “Hey, Corinne, you’re immature and privileged.” And she’s like, “I am in no way privileged,” and I’m like, “I don’t think Corinne knows what the word privileged means.”

She’s so drunk, always.

ROSE CEREMONY/BOUNCY HOUSE CONTROVERSY

The producers must’ve had a bet going to see how many times they could get the women to say the words “bouncy house,” because the contestants say it at least 30 times in five minutes. They’re very disappointed in the tomfoolery that went on in that inflatable castle and they all want Nick to send Corinne home.

But he doesn’t. He asks her to accept a rose with her privileged fingers, and she does.

Everyone's like, "OH NO HE DIDN'T!"

"It's seems like she's rubbing some of the girls the wrong way." - @chrisbharrison Maybe a bit...#TheBachelor http://pic.twitter.com/e4j2jD9cSW

— The Bachelor (@BachelorABC) January 24, 2017

And I’m like, “Of course he did!” Corinne makes for great TV and Nick wants to have sex with her. Why would he send her home? I don't even think the producers are making him hold onto her. He’s smart enough to know he needs drama for ratings because he’s been on this show 14,000 times before. Corinne is, if nothing else, drama (and also sex).

WE ALL HAVE TO GO TO MILWAUKEE NOW, UGH

Nick is from Wisglksdogiusdglwekhwhg, Wisconsin, which is a town near Milwaukee. So he’s like, “We’re going to Milwaukee!”

I wonder if ABC slashed the budget for this season, because Wisconsin isn’t the first place I’d think to take a group of women for sexy time. But Nick’s leaning into the whole “wholesome dude” thing, so I guess he wants to jump right in and take some women home to meet the folks. Again, not generally what I would do on a third date, but I’m also single, so maybe I should try it.

Speaking of burgers: They have these things in Milwaukee called butter burgers, where they put a huge piece of butter on the bun that melts all over the burger, and it’s incredible. I hope they eat those on the show.

youtube

Nick and his parents have lunch together and cry a lot.

A pep talk from Mom and Dad is worth a million roses. #TheBachelor http://pic.twitter.com/RRceJVd0Kt

— The Bachelor (@BachelorABC) January 24, 2017

DANIELLE L.’S ONE-ON-ONE DATE AT A NEIGHBORHOOD BAKERY

Nick and nail salon mogul Danielle L. go on a date to Nick’s hometown bakery. My friend Callie is like, “Is Nick wearing a henley?” And I’m like, “Yeah, he always wears henleys.”

I find henleys to be among the least attractive shirt options for men. Nick is lucky that I’m not on his season or I’d be like, “Will I accept this rose? Only if you accept the fact that you need to stop wearing henleys for this to work.”

On the date, they’re frosting cookies, and Danielle L. tries to draw Nick on a cookie but he ends up looking like a squid instead. My new best friends and I all agree that the reason Nick didn’t try to draw Danielle L. is because he would’ve just drawn two boobs and the bottom of her chin and been like, “oops, ran out of room!”

Ah, num num num! #TheBachelor http://pic.twitter.com/sX3CXtVMhR

— The Bachelor (@BachelorABC) January 24, 2017

This room collectively goes, “Ewwww!” when Nick and Danielle lick the frosting off each other’s fingers.

Then Nick and Danielle L. run into this woman named Amber, one of Nick’s exes, whom the producers definitely didn’t plant in the window of that coffee shop at the exact right time. They all have some fake awkward conversation and we move on.

Danielle L. and Nick go on an evening date where Danielle L.’s boobs are the star of the show. Danielle L. tells Nick that her biggest flaw is that her parents are divorced. Which is ... not a personal flaw, but OK.

Then they go to a country concert featuring some lame-ass, bro-ass country band I’ve never heard of and that Danielle L. probably hasn’t ever heard of either but has to pretend to be excited about. They make out in front of a lot of people.

"She got a smile that makes your worst day feel like your birthday." @iamchrislane #TheBachelor http://pic.twitter.com/061HlPq9nq

— The Bachelor (@BachelorABC) January 24, 2017

My friends Callie and Louisa suggest we play a game called “Are They Settling?” in which we have to decide if the women would be settling if they ended up with Nick. Settling is a great way to up the odds that a guy won’t cheat on you. We think Danielle L. might be settling.

DATE CARD

Back at the house, the women find out that Raven got the second one-on-one date. A bunch of the women are holding hands and I’m like, “See? The Women’s March Part II is all about female friendship!” and my new best friends and I all clink our glasses of wine.

SHITTY GROUP DATE

This is literally a shitty date, because they’re shoveling piles of manure at a dairy farm. They’re also milking cows. This is Real America, folks.

All the women are wearing white pants even though they admit that the producers told them not to wear white pants. They’re also wearing blankets — maybe they’re actually scarves or sweaters, but they all look like they raided the home section of an Anthropologie, grabbed the nearest rug, and tossed a belt around it. Nick, to his credit, is not wearing a henley, but he is wearing an Aaron Rodgers/Big Lebowski sweater.

It's a little early for trick-or-treating, but Aaron Rodgers went as The Dude anyway after last night's game. http://pic.twitter.com/UhH2DVljzG

— SB Nation (@SBNation) October 21, 2016

“This is the worst date I’ve ever been on,” says Corinne. “I need sushi.”

Never thought I’d say this, but I agree with Corinne. We all decide that Corinne would not be settling if she ended up with Nick.

Corinne is SO in danger of being lassoed by an unimpressed cowgirl right now. #TheBachelor http://pic.twitter.com/7dduHYbfa2

— The Bachelor (@BachelorABC) January 24, 2017

SHITTY GROUP DATE, NIGHT

All the women are talking trash about Corinne. Vanessa gives Nick a scrapbook filled with pictures of herself looking super pretty, goofy, and relatable that “her students” (she’s a special needs teacher as well as the most beautiful woman in the world) made for him but that she definitely just made herself.

Kristina and Nick are vibing. He’s like, “I love watching you,” which is creepy. She just kind of looks at him and smiles, so she’s probably a Russian spy sent by Putin. Hello, CIA? You may want to keep an eye on this chick.

Sarah asks Corinne, “Do you think you’re ready to marry a 36 year-old-man? I don’t see you meeting his maturity level. I would love to hear from you if you think you are.”

Corinne, in a confessional to the camera, is like, “I’ll show you mature,” and grabs her boobs, and I’m like, “Doesn't scream maturity to grab your boobs and smush them together on national television but who am I to judge.”

And then Corinne delivers the best line of the night:

“I know you were really upset for me falling asleep that day. I didn’t mean to offend anyone by taking that nap.”

She then says that Michael Jordan and Abraham Lincoln took naps, and honestly I can’t prove her wrong.

Perhaps the greatest reaction GIF in Bachelor history. You're welcome! Thanks Vanessa! #TheBachelor http://pic.twitter.com/qVgIAdup3k

— The Bachelor (@BachelorABC) January 24, 2017

RAVEN’S ONE-ON-ONE DATE AT A YOUTH SOCCER GAME WHICH ISN’T WEIRD AT ALL

Raven and Nick go to Nick’s little sister Bella’s youth soccer game. Bella — who is now 11 years old, I’m guessing — has been on every season of The Bachelorette that Nick has been on, and I’m pretty sure that’s enough cause to call the social workers in Wisglksdogiusdglwekhwhg, Wiscosin.

Raven meets Nick’s parents. Nick’s mom looks like Kate Gosselin did a Snapchat face-swap with Robin Wright Penn. Things are a little awkward, but I don’t know how you could expect them not to be when you meet a guy’s parents on the first date you have alone with him surrounded by camera crews.

We really just spent most of the date eating orange slices #TheBachelor http://pic.twitter.com/aDbYrOma9U

— Nick Viall (@viallnicholas28) January 24, 2017

Much like the producer’s “how many times can they say bouncy house” game, they seem to be doing the same thing with “hometown,” because Nick says it every other word. It’s like Morse code: “Hey (hometown) Bella, (hometown) great (hometown) game (hometown)!”

Then they all go to an arcade and go rollerblading. Bella’s eaten a lot of candy so her tongue is totally blue.

Nick’s henley (but not the same one he wore on his Danielle L. date) is very unbuttoned and it looks like he’s oiled up his shaved chest. He and Raven make out at the roller rink.

So kiss me! Raven and Nick on a great skate date! #TheBachelor http://pic.twitter.com/l5sbQaJjJy

— The Bachelor (@BachelorABC) January 24, 2017

RAVEN’S BEST STORY EVER

The night part of Raven and Nick’s date is cool, because it’s in the Milwaukee Museum of Fine Art, which is a dope-looking building. Raven gets vulnerable and tells Nick about her ex-boyfriend cheating on her. She says that someone told her that her ex-boyfriend — who was a doctor — was sleeping with a nurse while he was dating Raven. So her mom was like, “Go to his house.”

Raven had a key, so she did. The bedroom door was locked, so she kicked it open. My friends and I stop talking because we can tell this is about to get good.

Raven says her boyfriend “was on top of [the nurse], full-on thrusting.” She also says, “I know what her vagina looks like,” and Nick tries to be cool, but his face is like, WHOA!

Then Raven says she beat her ex in the head with a stiletto and the room erupts. We’re all like, “HELL YEAH RAVEN! Way to beat up your cheatin' ex with a stiletto!”

Here is a live look at Raven from that night:

My friend Liz is like, “Most women dream of beating a man with a stiletto. Raven has has lived most women’s dreams.”

I couldn’t agree more, Liz. I ride for Raven. She and Nick rollerblade out of the museum like the end couplet of a beautiful sonnet.

TAYLOR AND CORINNE GO AT EACH OTHER

The end of the episode is basically just Taylor and Corinne passive-aggressive-ing each other, and I’m honestly pretty bored by all of it. Taylor, who is 23 and somehow has a masters from Johns Hopkins in psychology, is trying to mess with Corinne by throwing around words like “emotional intelligence.” Corinne is like, “I’m not an idiot, I run a multi-million dollar company.”

I don’t believe Corinne on either count, but I do think she’s wily, and I wouldn’t underestimate her.

A RANDOM ASSORTMENT OF THOUGHTS

We didn’t see enough of Danielle M., Vanessa, or Rachel, all of whom are still my front-runners (and all of whom would be settling).

Raven is now my front-runner for Most Badass.

Corinne's eyes remind me of Jack Nicholson's in The Shining.

My friend Louisa brought up a good point, which is that this show provides contestants with tons of free deli meat, which is her biggest expense.

Dates on The Women’s March Part II are funny, because you just talk about the past few minutes of the date, so you never talk about anything besides talking about what you talked about, so it becomes this endless loop of discussing feelings about nothing.

They made Wisglksdogiusdglwekhwhg, Wiscosin look exotic. Turns out all you have to do to spruce up a barn is put some floral arrangements on bales of hay and fill the place with candles. Seems like a fire hazard to me, but hey, I’m not a doctor.

Next week we have to deal with more Corinne-Taylor drama bullshit when they go on a double date with Nick from which only one can return.

Corinne will obviously return.

The saddest part of this show — and the most real — is when women get sent home in the rose ceremonies in the first four or five episodes. Because at that point, their sadness doesn’t really have to do with Nick; it has to do with the fact that they just want to be loved, and going on the show was a fun way not to have to be single in the real world for a little bit.

And all these women just want to be loved! I wish I could reach through my TV, take their hands, and say, “Just go to a women’s march. You’ll find so many new best friends that you won’t even think about professional Bachelor-goer-oners like Nick.”

At least it worked for me.

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rkdaehwi · 5 years

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SUPERSTAR KT AUDITION

Sohn Youngjae February 22nd, 7:55 am Script chosen Outfit Gif credit

Honestly he was quite lucky that school hadn’t started again yet. The very narrow time window for auditions would have usually conflicted with his class hours, and although he would have skipped in a heartbeat, it would probably not look good in his record to be tardy so early on. Although he didn’t care too much about school Eric was also kind of scared to get in trouble so this situation was probably for the better. He didn’t know if an audition like this would be an excuse for absence even if his coming school was SOPA.

Although he was definitely not a morning person and had spent the rest of his days in between school end and start sleeping in as much as he possibly could with a nagging mother, Eric had figured that being early would leave a better impression. Thus it was five minutes to the assigned time when he appeared at the appointed location, almost falling asleep in the train multiple times on the way from Jongno. But he wasn’t going to let this be a repeat of his MGA audition even if it was ridiculously early and he just wanted to be home in his nice warm bed. He had been up so early today going through his wardrobe, trying on one set of clothes after the other and wondering what kind of look he should go for. In the end he had decided to play on his age and go for something that would enhance his teenage charms. What could possibly go wrong? If it was a game it was meant for people his age anyway wasn’t it? He’d be perfect for the role even if he possessed no sense of playing rhythm games whatsoever. But they probably needed people like him too who wasn’t masters and could do a cute ‘aw shucks I failed’ or show struggle or whatever. It’d be perfect.

Another thing that had taken time was his makeup -- unlike the previous show he had attended, he doubted this place would be kind enough as to offer stylists, so all participants probably had to take care of their own appearance from the get go. At first he had gone for a more idol esque look but the comments on his most recent instagram post had him second guessing himself, wipe it all off and settle for a very neutral ‘bareface’ look. Maybe they were right, maybe makeup just wasn’t for guys. He liked how it made him look though so it did make him kind of sad. But there was nothing to do about that now. Once he became a famous idol singer he didn’t have to worry about stuff like that.

Throughout the entire trip to Yongsan (when he hadn’t been about to nod off) the script he had chosen ran on repeat through his mind. Eric wasn’t good at studying and memorising stuff, so it had been a chore getting the lines down to perfection, but once he had thought of making up a small melody and singing it instead somehow it had been much easier. He always did find it quite easy to remember song lyrics. The hard part had been to be able to recite it without singing it though, but even that he had got down now after the last week of practice.

Five minutes passed, at 8 o’clock sharp, Eric stepped in through the door, eyes immediately landing on the receptionist and giving an eager wave before bouncing over and bowing his head. “Hello! Good morning” he greeted enthusiastically. “I’m here to audition for the game advertisements. You should have received my application, I’m Sohn Er--- uhm, Sohn Youngjae.” Although Eric was a name he had decided for himself, he just thought it suited him so much better than his real name to the point where he had got so used to it that he even mistook it himself. Honestly, once he was older there would probably come a day where he would officially change his name even if he knew it wouldn’t sit well with his parents. They liked the name they had given him and didn’t think too fondly of his obsession with anything Western. But as long as he felt it he figured he should do it.

The wait wasn’t as bad as he had feared it might be, but throughout the entirety of it, Eric’s eyes were darting around the premises and on the faces of those around him. From the nerves visible in many expressions these were the people who were also trying for a chance, so he supposed they were his rivals. A friendly greeting probably wasn’t welcome -- if anything had changed about Eric it was the fact that he was actually starting to learn how to read the air, something that had never been his strong suit and probably never would be. Some people were just different than him and it was hard for his mind to comprehend that.

Every so often someone new would enter and for a brief moment his attention would divert to them but quickly go back to whatever caught his interest again. That was until a familiar face appeared and Eric let out an incredibly loud gasp. He had completely forgotten that he was supposed to go to this thing together with his big brother. In the spur of the moment he had left the moment he had finished preparing, and, thinking back on it, Dowoon might have been in the bathroom brushing his teeth at the time. The gaze his older brother shot him told him that there would be trouble later, and Eric quickly diverted his eyes. If he couldn’t see the other he didn’t have to deal with him and the guy couldn’t skip in the line. Hence his life was still safe. For now. He did however text a quick ‘i’m sorry hyungggggg’ to him.

It didn’t take long until he was called in and somehow the atmosphere inside the audition room seemed incredible. A single male and female were sitting side by side looking incredibly professional and Eric felt slightly intimidated, but it was no time to be nervous now. He had never had a problem controlling his nerves before and he most certainly wouldn’t now either. The closest he had ever been to breaking down from nerves was his middle school math exam, and honestly this was nothing in comparison. If he could do maths he could also do this.

“Sohn Youngjae,” he called his name loud and clear and gave a 90 degree bow, “I’ll be starting now!” Honestly he was convinced that this chance was meant for younger people rather than adults -- even he thought the lines were embarrassing and he was still so young in comparison to some of the other people he had seen in the hallway. Simply imagining a man ten years or some older than him spouting this nonsense while acting cute at the same time was hard. He had a lot of respect for the original actor for pulling off something this cheesy.

With very clear words, Eric spoke his first line, keeping eye contact with the camera. He wasn’t sure if he should look at the device or the people, but he figured that with how many people they were going through, it was better to focus on the camera. His second line was delivered with a slight whine followed by sticking his bottom lip out into a pout and removing his eye contact with the camera to look away. In an instant his expression changed, one hand flat palm upwards in front of his chest, and the other hand gesturing to the empty space above it almost as if something was actually there. No props probably meant that they wanted him to be creative with his gestures and body language instead. Reciting the promotional tag line he gave a wink, before finishing off with his very last few words, forming a heart with his fingers and putting on a bright smile. With that his moment of attention was over, but he held his ending pose for two seconds before going into another bow. “Thank you for having me!” With those words he left the room with bouncy footsteps.

#rkssktaudition #ch: solo #rkdowoon #because mentioned

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