#the crew is politely but immediately requested to leave
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I want a sci fi fantasy epic involving a motley crew of space wanderers who include, among other characters, a pair of identical clones who absolutely despise each other
#they argue constantly and it's really bringing down team morale#no one has ever met a pair of clones before so at some point it just becomes Normal#until they land on a Planet of Clones where everyone lives in harmony with their identical soulmates#the crew is politely but immediately requested to leave
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request: Hello can I request yandere Emperor with a foreign dancer reader??? Like reader is runaway princess of a kingdom because she didn't wanted to marry an old noble man whom her parents choose for her to gain political support. Thank you!!
yandere!emperor x dancer!reader
you escaped your kingdom in the disguise of a dancer and it worked well with how skilled you are at dancing.
you ran away because your wish to marry for love was disregarded by the king and queen, your parents. they instead arranged you to a wealthy old nobel who's obviously does not have the best intentions.
you travelled along with your crew to various kingdoms to perform.
until you stopped to perform at the yandere!emperor's empire.
he was well known to be a benevolent emperor he already had a harem of his own occupied by the most beautiful women in the empire.
however he has not taken any empress yet, despite the Court's determination to marry one of their daughters to their beloved emperor.
when the day of the feast came, you were the star of the performance. eyes were on you, dazzling as you dance with grace.
with your beauty, everyone has fallen for you including the emperor himself.
he felt his heart beating out of his chest the moment his eyes landed on you, he couldn't take his eyes of you looking like a fever dream.
at that very moment he was determined to make you his.
he immediately asked his right hand to know about you and offered your crew to stay at the palace for a while in return for the performance you had given.
he started to subtly court you by asking for your presence to join in him for tea and a chat.
he then started to take you out on dates, which you don't mind assuming it was only the emperor's kindness and hospitality.
he also gave you gifts such as clothes and jewelery or anything your heart desires he will have it granted to you.
it took a while to make you fall for him but you did.
the emperor couldn't be even happier than having you.
he started to spoil you more and more which made his affections to you even obvious to the eyes of others.
he only requested you to his chambers to spend the night with him leaving the harem confused by his actions.
his courtship towards you spread out like fire within the empire.
because of this the court still continued to pursue the emperor to marry their daughters and it led to the jealousy of his consorts and concubines
you were subjected to various humiliation whenever the emperor was not around but you kept quiet to not cause a fuss
until you were fed up with the mistreatment
you packed your things and talked to the crew to leave the empire and embark on another adventure
when you went to see the emperor, he was happy to see you and even offered to spend time with you
however, his happiness was shattered the moment you said you needed to leave
he went to you and pulled you closer to him asking why are you leaving him and was begging not to leave him because you are his life
you hesitated to tell him but decided not to so you kept silent and went away.
that day the emperor became harsh and cold towards the servants and everyone who crosses his way.
he couldn't let you go, so he ordered his loyal servant to find out the cause of you suddenly leaving him.
it enraged him when he found out how you were treated by the nobles and his harem during your stay.
so he ordered his knights to murder all of the concubines and nobles who participated to make you miserable.
he also investigated your background and found out you were a runaway princess
he immediately went to negotiate with your parents to cut your engagement to whoever noble that it was in exchange for a greater benefit in exchange for your hand
they agree to his offer and he left, but not without a chaos at the kingdom
this action sparked a fear towards everyone among the empire.
they certainly did not expect him to commit a mass murder just because of a foreign dancer.
the news reached to you and you couldn't deny how it made you afraid soon enough he will be out to get you.
guess what, the next morning you open the door and see him staring at you with craziness and love behind those eyes of his.
behind him is his knights conquering the village you are staying at.
he grins down at you "hello my love, I'm glad to see you again."
I hope you like this! :)
#yandere!emperor#yandere oc x reader#yandere x reader#yandere emperor x reader#yandere oc#yandere hcs#yandere#yandere reader insert#royal requests#fem!reader
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Hi hii-! If it isn't a bother can i request either the dorm leaders + Jamil or the first years with an Mc who is basically like Mei from turning red with the whole turning into a Giant red panda and all? You can decide if they're gonna be yandere or nah i just wanna see how they would react to mc suddenly turning into a red panda whenever they get overwhelmed by their emotions ehe
Turning Red Reader | Yandere Twisted Wonderland
When you came to their world to be the magicless prefect they know and love Grim is expected to be the only furry member of Ramshackle. They are soon proven wrong when you finally lose it. All the overblots, the stress, the mysteriously creepy gifts addressed to you. You’re hairs bright red color was nothing more than a random trait until you turned into a giant red panda:
Vil Schoenheit
“Well darling, this is unexpected…”
He’s genuinely surprised
But he can make this work
Being a connoisseur of working under pressure
He knows exactly how to calm you
Even when you're a giant panda
Some things may have to change like the amount of the sleeping potion he will give you
But know worries he can adapt
And with your newfound fame who better to preen you for your upcoming career
“Trust me, dear, this is my territory. So leave your cute paws in my hands.”
Kalim Al Asim
“Sooooo Fluffffy!!!!”
He’s so obsessed with shoving his face in your fur
And if you let him ride you, he’s on cloud 9
Your even cuter than you were before
But this is because your stressed!?!
Well as your future husband bestest friend he’s going to change that
So stay in Scarabia don’t even worry about going back to Ramshackle
He wants you to get used to living in luxury anyway
He’s more than happy to have you and Grim stay
Especially when you’re transforming into a panda
“Come on (Y/n)! You shouldn’t have to be stressed to bring out the panda!”
Azul Ashengrotto
“Well, we all have our…vices.”
This complicates things
How’s he supposed to turn you into a mermaid now?!
But it's fine
Hey, if you’ve made money on this before
He’s more than happy to get a piece of the pie
Granted he’s not exactly pleased that this is a stress response
Whoever’s the cause of that stress he’ll politely intercede
With a contract that will have their lively hood on the line
“Just know that once you sign my contract all your cares and worries and you+ will be mine to take care of.”
Riddle Rosehearts
“I see, we both seem to have our own reactions to stress.”
He’s oddly elated
He loves you deeply obsessively
So he will not tolerate anyone speaking negatively
Anyone
He’s offing everyone’s heads that he sees talking badly about your latest change
He relates and he wants to help
Funnily enough his fiery reaction to things you consider stressful has you relaxing if only to calm him down
And he’ll never admit it but he’s found you 10x more attractive when you angrily panda out
Leona Kingscholar
“See? I warned you not to bother them us. It’s not my fault your body will be in shreds.”
All the more reason to stay napping with him
But when you panda out he prefers to sit back and enjoy
He doesn’t really bother doing anything unless it's calming you down
And hiring a crew to clean up after you
He only is bothered by it when you don’t immediately yield to his control
Well other than your turning into a panda you’re still just a magicless prefect
That’s why it should be easier to keep you under his control
That or you’re going to be stressed with how many of your friends start avoiding you
Malleus Draconia
“What a marvelous trait!”
His heart is already set on you
But what is this?
This insatiable desire to rub his face into your fur and carry you around in your giant form?
“Is this…the fabled…cuteness?”
If anyone’s going to forget that they very well bring armageddon from cuteness aggression it's him
And because you being you have already fueled his emotions the electrical tempest that plagues NRC
He just reacts even worse when others have the same appreciation for your panda perfection
But only he is going ableto monopolize it
After all you don’t want the entire island falling into a sleep-like death right?
Jamil Viper
“So your emotions are tied to your panda and when it comes out?”
“Yeah…”
“That’s really cute That’s inconvenient.”
He’s pleased you most likely rely on him to assuage yourself from freaking out
And boy does he have so much more power
While your under his spell he might as well advise you to ask him on a date
Or forget about that missing student
Idia Shroud
“Whoa (Y/n)’s cuteness stats just upped themselves 40%!”
He’ll make even more merch
But he’s not selling it
There for him to squeeze and cuddle and pretend to make out with
Even better if you panda out in his room
so he can have your scent everywhere
He might even instigate it
#yandere twisted wonderland x reader#yandere twst x reader#yandere twisted wonderland#yandere twst malleus#yandere riddle rosehearts#yandere riddle roseheart x reader#yandere jamil x reader#yandere jamil viper#yandere x reader#lovelyyandereaddictionpoint#yandere x you#yandere idia shroud x reader#yandere idia#yandere idia x reader#yandere riddle#yandere#yandere leona kingscholar#yandere leona kinsscholar#yandere leona kingscholar x reader#yandere leona x reader#yandere kalim al asim#yandere kalim x reader#yandere malleus draconia#yandere malleus x reader#yandere twst#yandere malleus#yandere azul ashengrotto#yandere azul twst#yandere azul x reader#yandere azul ashengrotto x reader
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Hi! Can I request a One Piece x Immortal!Devil Fruit!Child!Reader. The Reader has a Devil Fruit that doesn't allow them to actually die. They can Die but they 'Respawn' at a Random Location. They stay a Child forever and has met many people. Like Gol. D. Roger. And Whitebeard and Younger Shanks and Buggy.
Please and thank you.
I know you work very hard and are very busy but I am always patient. You don't have to write this, I understand. :)
Make sure not to burn yourself out!
-You could only look up at the marine who was going to cut you down, as the marines who had invaded the island you had been calling home were raiding everything and killing whoever they came across, wanting to purge the area so they could build a new base.
-It wasn’t the first time you had seen corruption in the World Government, and you knew it wasn’t the last.
-You weren’t scared, you knew that you wouldn’t die, you would just respawn somewhere else, completely fine. You had been scared when you first discovered your ability, more than four hundred years ago, leaving you stuck at age 6, but now, feeling the blade hit you, there was no fear.
-Warm sunshine hit your face as loud screaming filled the air around you, multiple people sounding freaked out as you opened your eyes.
-A… reindeer was crying loudly, looking down over you while a pretty woman with long dark hair had your head on her lap. The reindeer had a stethoscope, holding it to your chest while others were all freaking out, as you had just appeared in a bright flash of light.
-You inhaled the smell of salty air and you saw the bright blue sky above you, “Am I on a ship?” instantly the screaming stopped as they all turned to you, seeing that you were awake as you sat up, completely fine.
-Despite knowing that you are immortal, you always check where you would have died, where you had been hit by the sword, and like normal there was nothing there.
-Luffy came over, squatting down next to you, “So you are you?” you looked up and your eyes instantly went sparkly, “I saw you in the paper- you’re Luffy! Your bounty is so high!” Luffy immediately beamed, feeling flattered by your praise as he ruffled your hair before you spoke as Nami kneeled next to you, “My name is Y/N. It’s nice to meet you all!”
-Robin smiled warmly, petting your hair, “You’re so polite.” You turned, nodding up at her, “I’ve learned lots over my life. I am over four hundred after all!”
-All eyes went wide, hearing this before Brook, Usopp, and Chopper started screaming, thinking you were a zombie or a ghost, panicking while Luffy and Zoro were poking your cheeks, finding that you were very much alive, and you were not a zombie.
-Franky lifted his large hand to his face, a smaller hand coming from the palm, lifting up his glasses, “So how did you come from a flash of light onto our ship.”
-Your eyes widened, as you had always been alone when you respawned, “So that’s what it looks like… well to put it simply, I respawned here. Whenever I die, I respawn in a random location. Where I was living was being attacked by marines, and I got killed, so I woke up here!”
-Stunned silence filled the air, all of them staring at you like you had three heads before most of the crew freaked out, “YOU DIED?!”
-You held your hands over your ears, the loud sound shocking you before you nodded, “Correct. I ate an icky fruit about four hundred years ago, and when I was killed shortly after, I woke up in a new place until I was killed the next time.”
-Eyes were wide, some in shock, others in anger, hearing that you had been attacked and killed so many times, Nami immediately had you in her arms, hugging you close, angry tears in her eyes, “You were attacked? By who!?”
-Luffy was oddly quiet as well, you were only a child, a young one, and to hear that you had lived and died so many times, it made him furious to think that you had suffered so much.
-You spoke up, answering Nami’s question while you were holding one of Brook’s hands, as you had never met a talking skeleton before, “This time was marines, they liked our island and wanted to build a new base, but the town I lived in was in the way, so they came and said we were all criminals and started killing everyone so they could build their new base.”
-Moments later you were in the galley with Sanji and Chopper, Sanji giving you a sandwich which you quickly tore into, your eyes sparkly, “It’s yummy!” which made him smile as he was in charge of keeping you occupied while Chopper wanted to do a medical evaluation on you while the others were preoccupied, changing courses after you told them which island you had been on.
-You were welcomed instantly into the crew, despite being a child, and they all gave their word to keep you safe, something nobody had ever told you before.
-However, you had no idea how angry they actually were, until you reached your old island, seeing the bodies of those you had called friends being burned along with the buildings, marines already making building plans.
-You had to remain on the ship with Jinbei, sitting on his shoulders as he was in charge of destroying the ships, something you were sparkly-eyed over, seeing his fishman karate, “Will you teach me how to do that?”
-Jinbei laughed warmly, finding your enthusiasm refreshing, ruffling your hair affectionately, “Sure thing Y/N- we can start tomorrow!” you threw your hands up, cheering loudly, ignoring the screams of those on the island getting their well-deserved karma.
-You ran to Luffy, hugging him around his knees, “That was so cool! You were all like POW! And WAM!” Luffy enjoyed hearing your take on their battle, beaming brightly before you grinned, “Can I have a bounty too?”
-Nami, Sanji, and Usopp all shouted out, “NO!” not wanting to taint you, but Luffy was quickly laughing, “We’ll get you the biggest bounty ever!!” you threw your hands up, cheering loudly as Luffy called for a celebration, welcoming you officially to the Straw Hats.
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Can I request a Hunter x fem!reader where the Batch are undercover a criminal party for a mission and he asks her for a dance and they tear up the dance floor with their moves and undeniable chemistry? (Can be spicy or SFW, your choice)
If you need music to set the mood for the party, I got you:
— Dancing with a Stranger
hunter x f!reader
this is a requested one shot (1k)
warnings: 18+, sexual topics & implication of sex, alcohol usage
notes: neither hunter or reader are drunk/intoxicated - neither have finished their first drinks.
summary: hunter sees reader from across the room while he (and tech) are undercover at a pirate party for intel.
A/N: thank you so much for the request, @kombatkid ! this is my first request for tbb & i hope i did it justice. also, i’ve wanted to write a fic like this for so long - thank you for giving me reason to xd <3
requests are open!
“Hunter,” Tech started, eyeing the girl across the room, “If you do not initiate a conversation with her, I will.”
Hunter looked at his brother, wide-eyed, “What has gotten into you, Tech?” When the mentioned didn’t offer an answer, Hunter continued, “We have a mission - best we stick to it.”
“What better way to gather intel than from the source?” Tech’s eyes wandered to the girl clad in a dark red dress, hugging her form in all the right places. “It is not a bad thing to ‘let go’ once in a while. I am sure Echo would agree with me if he were here.”
Hunter’s mind wandered to his brothers stuck on the Marauder, wishing he didn’t have one of the less attention grabbing appearances in the group - face tattoo and all. The tattoo did help him fit in with the pirates surrounding him, though. At the change of the song, Hunter was brought back to reality - back to you.
“Am I allowed to say no?” Hunter rhetorically asked, already knowing what Tech’s answer would be. Before his brother could even reply, a sigh left Hunter’s lips, “If you record this, you’re on cleaning duty.”
“I wouldn’t dream of it!” Tech spoke, a mischievous glint in his eye. Once Hunter was far enough away from him, Tech started the recording for his brothers. Force, they were going to love this.
You leaned on a high table and observed the scene around you - loud music, dancing people, drinks. God, the drinks were incredible - they were the only reason you were there to begin with. Partying with people like you was definitely not your idea of fun, but people watching was. You took a sip of your drink, hardly having touched it. Your crew seemed to be having the time of their lives on the dance floor, leaving you by yourself. That was how all of these outings went - they coerce you that “it will be fun!” and “you’ll have a great time!”, but these parties have yet to live up to either expectation.
You were disturbed from your thoughts when a man with a half-skull tattooed on his face walked up to you - he looked to be having as much fun as you were. He stood beside you, holding a drink of his own and sipping from it. You’d be the first to admit he’s attractive - more attractive than anybody else in the crowded room. You turned to face him fully, placing your elbows on the table.
After a few moments of pounding music in the background, the man spoke.
“Do you wanna…” He awkwardly started, motioning with his head toward the pit of people, “with me?”
You thought for a moment. Anyone who’d asked before you declined immediately, yet this was tempting. You weren’t sure if it was the alluring presence of the man or if the liquor was hitting, but you ultimately decided to accept the invitation, taking the hand he offered.
The man led you to an open space between people before grabbing hold of your waist and giving you a look, asking if his hand placement was okay. You nodded, letting a smile grace your lips. A polite and handsome man? That’s a first at parties like these.
A familiar song came on, to which your eyes lit up - you love this song. You’d always wanted to dance to it at parties like these, but you’d never had a partner to. You felt yourself let go of whatever front you were putting up and allowed your hips to sway, the hands on your waist gripping you tighter.
You’d found yourself with your back turned to the stranger after the first verse, his hands now on your stomach. You bent over and brought your hands up your legs, leaving his hands to trail to your hips. Your ass brushed against his crotch, something almost bursting at the seams of his trousers. As you came back up, your back was flush against his chest and he breathed heavily in your ear, head slightly tilted downward.
The two of you continued the sensual dance to the song - two strangers in sync. The chemistry between you only strengthened with each song played, the last song ending with both of you out of breath and leaning against each other - your hands on the nape of his neck, tangled in his hair and his hands gripping your waist. Sweat was now dripping from your faces as you looked at the man you didn’t even know the name of - he was perfect.
For the first time, you didn’t want the night to end. Usually you were anticipating the time to leave - not this time. You were with the perfect man, who somehow single-handedly made the experience one of the best you’ve ever had.
“All of that and I didn’t even catch your name,” he whispered into your ear, the music finally having been turned off. You refused to move, as did he - you were both enjoying it too much.
“You know, everyone has to pass the dance test before earning that right,” You joked with him. You leaned back far enough to see the smile on his lips - along with the blush on his cheeks.
A laugh fell from his lips, “Surely I got a passing grade.”
“Just barely,” You offered your name with a smile, and learned his name - Hunter. “Well, Hunter. Thank you,” You combed your fingers through his hair, “I had a good time. Too bad it’s over.”
Hunter thought for a minute before boldly speaking, hoping he didn’t read the room wrong - “Who says it’s over?”
The next morning (after getting your comm channel), Hunter returned to his brothers on the Marauder. They all greeted him with knowing looks - looks that said ‘you got laid’ in not as many words.
“I am impressed by your ability to ‘connect’ with people,” Tech said, eyes trained on his datapad. “I would not be surprised if you returned with no information - thank the Force I was there too.”
“Didn’t know you could move like that, Hunter!” Wrecker laughed with a clap to Hunter’s upper-back, “Ya gotta teach me sometime!”
“Cleaning duty for the next month, Tech.” Hunter winced, knowing his brothers have all seen his less-than PG dancing with a stranger. He walked to the bunks, ready to get some much needed sleep before hearing someone’s muttering.
“Worth it.”
tags: @skellymom @burningfieldof-clover @dangraccoon
if you’d like to be tagged, fill out my taglist form through the word “agree” in my bio or at the bottom of my masterlist! <3
thank you for reading! check out my masterlist!
#star wars#the bad batch#bad batch#sw tbb#tbb#the bad batch x reader#the bad batch hunter x reader#tbb hunter x reader#the bad batch hunter#star wars fanfiction#hunter x reader#tbb hunter#xena’s fics
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I'm thinking about Ed at the beginning of episode 7 and how he was getting ready to leave. I'm imagining that maybe the night before he tried making one last pass at Stede, one last try to see if Stede was interested, but still nothing. And Ed is being so blatant now, even more so than he had been with the "Run me through" thing and yet still no response from Stede. And Ed thinks that Stede can't possibly be this oblivious, he must be ignoring it on purpose as a way of letting Ed down gently. So Ed gives a subtle "message received" and starts thinking about leaving.
Ed's words the next morning make so much sense and hold so much weight in this context. " Prepare for the next adventure... I can't stay around here forever. Besides, a ship has only one captain." Ed got rejected last night and so now he's making plans to move on.
Stede's response (after a brief interruption from Roach) seems clear too. "Hey, listen, don't feel as though you need to rush out on my account. I mean, we're all enjoying your company here." He's letting Ed know that just because he rejected him that doesn't mean he's running him off. He's not going to make Ed leave or kick him out of the friend group.
This leads to Ed's last response of this interaction. "Mate, I know, I know. Me too. Uh, just, you know, I've stayed longer than I figured I would, and I just wasn't built for sitting idle, man." This is a polite fiction they're sharing in, an excuse for Ed to leave and get the space he needs without making Stede out to be the bad guy or forcing Ed to make himself vulnerable by admitting how much the rejection hurt him.
Stop. Rewind. The night before, Ed expressed his interest in Stede in a way that was very blatant IF you speak queer-coded gay subtext. Stede does not speak that language; he's never had the chance to learn before. He wasn't rejecting Ed, because he had no idea anything was on offer. So to him, Ed's plans to leave come out of nowhere, and the only explanation he has is the "only on captain" comment, immediately reinforced by Roach being confused as to which of them is captain.
This is what Stede is actually speaking to. Don't rush off on my account is him expressing that he, as the other captain in this two captain situation, is not bothered by it at all. And he reassures Ed the crew is fine with it too. There's no reason Ed has to leave.
Stede recognizes Ed response as a polite lie. Of course he does; you think Stede hasn't been subjected to hundreds, thousands, of polite dismissals in his life. Stede is too much, not enough, too soft, so weird, so boring. And to get brushed off by Ed, Stede's first friend, the one person that he thought understood him, that's devastating.
Stede has to keep Ed as a friend, so he does the only thing he can think to do: Be Better. It's never worked before, but it has to work this time, so it will. Stede will Be Better.
He finds the treasure map, excited to bring Ed the next adventure he was going to go out searching for. But Ed is still brushing him off, pretending that the map isn't real (of course it's real! its got tatty edges!) saying he wants to take a nap. Which fine, if Ed wants to keep throwing all these polite excuses at Stede, then Stede is going to use them against him. Ed said there can only be one captain? Fine, then Stede is the captain and he's going to make Ed come with him on this adventure to fix their friendship and prove that Stede can Be Better.
Except, stop, wait. Ed is not giving Stede the brush off. Remember, to Ed, Stede reject him last night and now Ed is expressing the desire for a little space. And even if he's not willing to say outright that he was hurt by the rejection, in expressing the desire at all, he is implying it. And now Stede is ignoring Ed's request for space and throwing Ed's own vulnerability back in his face to force him to come along. What an unbelievable asshole move.
Ed is pissed now, of course. He's being forced to spend time with someone who just rejected him to do something he wasn't interested in doing at all, and he didn't even get lunch! So he's pissy, but it's because Stede is being dick, so he doesn't care who knows it.
And then Lucius calls Ed a dick. And suddenly the whole situation gets flipped. Stede put this day together for Ed, presumably because he took Ed's comments about the next adventure and sitting idle as a serious expression of desire, and tried to deliver on that. Does Stede actually return Ed's feelings after all? Does it matter? Stede is Ed's friend who deeply cares about him, and that is a relationship worth preserving.
Meanwhile poor Stede is at the end of his rope. He tried to Be Better, and once again he failed. He always fails. Except now suddenly Ed has changed his mind. Does Stede know why Ed flipped scripts out of nowhere? Again, does it matter? Ed is here now, putting in the effort to engage with Stede and cheer him up. He's Stede's friend again; everything is going right again.
The day ends well enough that Stede is willing to reach out once more that evening. It is perhaps part apology for using Ed's words against him earlier that day, part offer, and part request. "I don't know if I, well agree that a ship can only have one captain."
Ed hears the offer clearly this time, and makes one of his own, "Yes, well, I suppose if you found the absolutely two perfect people, then they could potentially…"
And then, finally, after a long day of hurt and talking past each other, now together, in every sense, they say,
Co-captain.
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Combat Adulterants
Excerpt from an intelligence briefing regarding human combat metabolics:
"Human recreational chemicals overlap with chemical weaponry frequently. There was an incident many orbits ago where a human work crew were given isopropyl alcohol instead of the requested ethyl alcohol.
*projector clicks*
"These are the results. A group of 40 humans overpowered a crew of 500, commandeered the vessel and crash landed on a pleasure planet."
"How many fatalities?" A student asks.
"Three. All were from humans who decided to drink the rubbing alcohol despite knowing the potential for lethal outcomes. Another dozen seriously poisoned themselves.
*projector clicks*
"These are classified images from the Y-Alpha-Y-Zero Incident. Some damn fool got into a land dispute with Humans. The human colony was recently established and lacked significant defensive measures. The non-human (nohum) military force had an overwhelming advantage of high energy weapons and smart defense tech.
"The power imbalance was such that the commander of the NoHum forces correctly feared Human retribution if the colony was exterminated. They decided that the Human propensity for self destructive behavior could provide cover from political blowback. Inadequate intelligence assessments regarding human criminal history caused a fatal miscalculation.
"The NoHum commander used clandestine methods to introduce large amounts of addictive drugs to the human population. The hope was that the manufactured health crisis would provide political justification for military intervention. It was also assumed that the weakened humans would be so easy to conquer an 'accidental' annihilation could be forgiven.
*projector clicks, students gasp*
"There were no non-human survivors. Over half the human fatalities were from cardiac arrhythmia with no detectable battle injuries. Not only did essentially unarmed humans repel the attack, they immediately marched 100 km to the enemy base leaving it a smoking ruin.
[Video footage of several humans ripping apart an office with rudimentary tools or bare hands. One notices the camera and looks directly at it. "Send. More. Cocaine!" They scream. *cut to static*]
End excerpt.
#humans are space orcs#humans are space oddities#humans are aliens#humans are confusing#humans are deathworlders#humans are silly#drug ment tw#drugs cw#drugs#cocaine#hfy#humans are space australians
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OMG Pirate AU ! I WANNA TAKE IT ! 😍
Let's imagine, everyone fears James Barnes and his crew, but what if he saves you from your drowning ship and you immediately feel a bond between each other. So he let's you Stay in his room, away from his crew which looks at you like some prey.. but he's the one keeping you save and warm at night when she shows you his sensual side? 😉😉🥵🥵
I know it's late, don't judge me!!! Also I hope it's not shit 😘😘😘 thank you @imagine-all-the-fandoms for requesting and sorry it took so long ❤️❤️❤️
Warnings: p in v, kissing, pining, reader is attacked but saved, pregnancy mentioned
You sat shivering and wet on the deck of the Howling Wolf. You'd heard tales of this ship, it's wild crew and the infamous captain James 'Bucky' Barnes. They were feared across the Carribbean by anyone with sense. They would arrive on an island like a summer storm, filling their ship with all the goods, treasures and drink they could find. They enjoyed the pleasures of women at local taverns, fought over cards and walked the line between heroes and horrors, depending on who you asked.
You had been travelling with your father, when a band of pirates had attacked the ship. You managed to hide away, but realised when all fell quiet that the ship was aflame and you were trapped in the hull. You took a risk and fought your way up to the deck in time to jump into the sea before the gunpowder stores exploded.
You had slipped in and out of consciousness as you clung to a piece of driftwood until you heard shouting from above. You were lifted to the deck of the ship and here you sat, exhausted beyond belief and terrified of what was to come.
You watched the crew as they leered and nudged each other. Your dress was torn, exposing your soft, delicate body to their hungry eyes. You bit your lip, to stop yourself from whimpering. You wouldn't let them see you cry.
Suddenly heavy footsteps dragged all their attention away and they leapt to their feet as the captain approached. He stopped in the centre and shouted at his crew who had stopped working since your arrival. Suddenly they sprang to work and you were left waiting. Waiting for his judgement.
He crouched down and you met his gaze. "Welcome aboard" he said quietly before running his eyes over your body. He stood up and removed his jacket before wrapping it around you, providing a little more coverage. He asked your name, and raised his eyes at the response, recognising that you were the daughter of an eminent judge who had sent many pirates to the gallows. You cringed as you could see the thought running through his mind. "Well perhaps for the moment we can keep that information between us?" You nodded and he clicked his tongue, looking at your sore, bloodied feet, ragged hair, wild eyes. He scooped you up without warning and carried you out of the heat of the sun. His crew whistled and whooped and you struggled a little in his arms. He carried you into his lavish quarters and placed you on his bed. "Please don't" you whispered pulling his jacket tighter around your body. He shook his head, "relax, you are safe here, but it's better to let their imagination run wild, they'll leave you alone if they think you're mine..."
Something in your stomach flipped when he said 'mine' but you pushed it to the side. He passed you some wine and water which you gulped greedily. "Sleep" he said and abruptly left the room. You shivered again before sliding down onto his pillow and slipped into a slumber.
-----------------------🏴☠️-----------------------
Later that day he returned with food and clothes. He dropped the dresses on the bed but you sprang up and rushed over to the food, absolutely starving, forgetting all sense of decorum and stuffed your face with whatever was in front of you. He sat down and chuckled at you while he helped himself a little more politely than you.
Finally you slowed down and realised your rudeness. "Oh I'm so sorry" you gasped and buried your face in you hands. He laughed again and poured you more to drink, "Please! I should have fed you sooner, I'm a terrible host." You smiled softly and shook your head, "you've been very kind..."
That night he left you to his bed while he slept on a fancy chaise lounge. You watched him silently in the dark, wondering if he would change his attitude, but he just snored softly, fidgeting every so often. He was more handsome than the stories gave him credit for, he had a few scars but they only added to his features. He had a thick, tidy beard that he scratched often when he was talking. His chestnut hair was often tied in a ponytail but a few wisps hung around his face like a frame. His eyes were bluer than any ocean or sky you'd seen in your life. Every so often they were fixed on you, pinning you to your seat, as if he could see your innermost thoughts. Which you were starting to hope wasn't possible.
There had also been a rumour about his arm, lost in a fearsome battle. Some say with soldiers, others said it was a monster from the deep. The story, they said was that he replaced his arm with a silver one forged by Poseidon and would live on the waves forever in repayment to the King of the Oceans.
You had spied the arm, and it was a thing of beauty. Most pirates had wooden limbs so his silver arm was much more impressive, but you didn't think it was as mythical as the stories suggested. You would ask him about it one day. Before you knew it you had drifted off to the sounds of his snores and dreamed of flashes of silver and tanned skin wrapped around you in the moonlight.
-----------------------🏴☠️-----------------------
After a few days you were dying for a wash. Your hair was starting to stick together, your sweat settled on you and overall you felt pretty disgusting. You mentioned to Bucky and he glanced out his window. "I'll see what I can do..." You giggled at him, "you can control the weather Captain Barnes?" He smiled and leaned over until he was inches from you, "You'll have to wait and see little nymph."
He left you all day and you could feel the ship being strained left and right, his voice carried from the deck to your room catching you out every so often as your mind drifted to him.
That evening he knocked on the door and smiled when you answered. "Your shower awaits my lady." You laughed again and let him lead you up to the deck. The fresh rain hammered down on the deck. He had set up sheets around to give you privacy and provided soaps. You could only stare at him, "You.... You made it rain?" He chuckled, wiping the rain from his forehead. "Enjoy, little nymph" and he left you.
You found your way to the middle and quickly disrobed. The rain was slightly warm and you sighed as it ran over your body. The soaps he provided were beautifully scented and you spent ages cleaning your hair and scrubbing at your skin until it was smooth and silky again. The suds gathered around your feet and rinsed away beneath you.
That was when you heard a creak. Before you could react, a man ripped one of the sheets from in front of you. You screamed as he grabbed you, his breath stinking and hands bruising your body as he dragged you to the floor. "He's been hiding you away from us, and now I see why..." His gravelly voice sending a chill through your body and tears at your eyes. You screamed again, arms flailing and clawing at him as he tried to get you.
Pain tore at your limbs when suddenly the weight was lifted from you. You grabbed the fallen sheet and flipped around to see James lifting the man from the ground, silver arm glinting in the moonlight.
"You dare to touch her?" He growled, his arm tightening around the throat of your attacker. The man whimpered and gasped as his captain walked to the edge of the ship and held him over the side. "Please, I made a mistake..." The man strained and flailed over the ocean, James just nodded. "Yes you did, none will make it again..." And without warning he let go of the man.
He returned to you, rage and concern fighting on his features. He scooped you up and stormed back to his room. He left you there for a while and you grabbed a dry sheet to wrap around your body. You could hear him shouting at his men, the most animated you had heard him in your entire stay. You shivered again, not sure if it was the cold or the shock but you didn't know what to do with yourself. You just waited for him.
Finally the door clicked open and you stood up. You both stared at each other for a moment before you ran to him. You wrapped your arms around his neck and pressed your lips to his. His hands pulled the sheet from your body and glided over your damp skin. Finally you broke away and looked at him, his hands cupped your cheeks. "Are you alright? I'm sorry, I didn't know he was there...I just wanted to do something nice for you...shit" He groaned and leaned his forehead against yours. You stroked his beard and shook your head. "I'm alright, I'm alright...." He chuckled and ran his hands through your wet hair and tilted your chin up. "Well I need to check I think...."
-----------------------🏴☠️-----------------------
You lay back on his bed, candlelight illuminating your body. He threw his own clothes to the corner of the room and crawled over you. Your hands glide over his thick muscles as he presses kisses to your face. "I've been dreaming about this little nymph, couldn't believe you washed up on my boat of all places." You smiled and wrapped your arms around his neck, nuzzling into his chest as he growled at you.
His hands explored your body like a man starved. His rough hands squeezed at your breasts, lips wrapping around your nipples. He tickled your tummy before stroking your thighs, spreading them wide to expose your heat to him. He sucked in in a breath as he dipped down and licked and sucked at your heat. You whined and sank your fingers into his hair. "Oh my god..." You whined as he devoured you, holding you tight to the bed as you writhed beneath his ministrations.
You cried out as you drew closer to your peak, but he pulled away, leaving you begging for more. "Patience little nymph, can't let you have all the fun..." You groaned and clawed at his back and wrapped your thighs around his waist. "Captain....." You whined and he chuckled, rubbing his length against your soaking folds. He groaned as he sank into your heat and you gasped at the size of him filling you up. He took a moment for you both to adjust before he began to slide in and out of you, the pressure building in your stomach again. He captured your lips in a searing kiss, your breaths catching as you both threw all your lust and desire into kisses and touches.
As his hips snapped harder you cried out and gasped for air, holding on to him tightly as you both peaked together. After a moment you collapsed against each other, panting for breath and holding each other tightly. You wanted to savour the feeling of him wrapping you close, the scent of salt and sweat on his skin, the deep rumble of his voice. But you couldn't keep awake and drifted into a sleep in his arms, legs tangled in the sheets and each other.
-----------------------🏴☠️-----------------------
Months later you found yourself free to roam the ship, spending most of your days on deck, bathing in the warm sunshine. Now that you were Bucky's and his retribution for touching you very swift and savage, you were free to do as you pleased.
You sat in a beautiful chair he had stolen from a court house, draped with furs taken from a trade ship and you wore all the finest clothes and jewels he could get for you.
"How is my little nymph?" He would ask, coming up to press kisses to your head, cheeks and lips, before running his hand over the little bump that had grown in your belly. You couldn't help but smile and return his kisses, holding his hand to you, the scent of the sea and his ocean blue eyes offering all the adventure you'd ever need....
#pirate Bucky#request fic#2k celebration#bucky barnes#bucky x reader#bucky barnes fanfiction#bucky imagine#bucky smut#bucky barnes smut
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Please continue with the rest of the crew for the attractive S/O ask
Maine's crew with an attractive s/o
Note: Sorry for taking a lot of time to post! The requests are piling up! (I am happy people like my work that much!) I will be doing my best to finish them ASAP.
Part 1 Part 2
Characters: Lucy, Dorio, Falco
TW: mention of violence, harassment
Dorio
Dorio is chill, she won't rub it in anyone's face that the two of you are together, mostly because almost everyone knows that the two of you are together and they know not to mess around with either of you.
People know well to respect you. Whenever someone tries to get your number it's a person who's new around. People who know or know of Dorio know she will beat their asses if they harass you.
But if things get out of hand, she does intervene. She goes over to you, puts her arm over you and rather calmly explains that you are her's.
And if that doesn't work out she just gives the person bothering you a good ol' smack and that's that.
Afterwards she apologizes to you about the situation, even though she knows it's not her fault.
Lucy
Lucy is jealous and territorial. In her own way of course.
She makes it obvious to not cross her or you. Friend or not she doesn't care. She will have her way one way or another.
She isn't one to just announce that you're together either. People like Maine, Dorio, Kiwi know that, but others? Not so much.
When someone starts flirting with you, she let's it play out. She let's you handle the situation however you want, but she does give the person a nasty glare.
When things take a turn for the worst, and the person gets desperate, where they are pressuring you to give them your number, she's getting pretty pissed.
She usually just brain fries them and they fuck off, but when she gets mad enough she does make an open threat towards the person out of line.
After it's over she let's you be. But she does pay extra close attention to who gets close to you.
Falco
Falco doesn't really leave your side for these situations to happen often. But when they happen, they happen when you get a drink, go to the restroom, etc.
He always has an arm around you, just out of habit. So people usually notice that you two are together, if they don't know you.
When these incidents do happen, he doesn't immediately interfere, but when he sees you getting uncomfortable, he does come to your aid.
He explains to the person that you are with him, and that they need to back off because you're uncomfortable, but a bit more politely.
When that doesn't work, he doesn't threaten them openly, but he does make it clear that they need to leave you be. And that's usually it.
Afterwards he makes you as comfortable as he possibly can.
#david martinez x reader#edgerunners david#rebecca x reader#edgerunners rebecca#lucy x reader#edgerunners lucy#dorio x reader#edgerunners dorio#maine x reader#edgerunners maine#kiwi x reader#edgerunners kiwi#falco x reader#edgerunners falco#pilar x reader#edgerunners pilar#sasha x reader#edgerunners sasha#cyberpunk#fanfiction#romance#x reader#cyberpunk 2077#cyberpunk edgerunners#edgerunners
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Floral Scented Hugs
Ship: Stede Bonnet x Reader (ambiguous, could be romantic or platonic)
Notes: You ask Stede for a hug. He goes all out.
There needs to be more Stede love out here! He’s a darling. So, I wrote out the whole scenario from the Headcanons: Hugging the Revenge Crew post.
Warnings: none
“Uhhh… Captain?” You questioned softly. You couldn’t help but feel kind of anxious. All you’d done was ask Stede if he wanted a hug and he’d gone silent. “You… uh… Don’t have to… I mean… If you don’t want-”
“NO!” Stede cut off, making you both jump at the unexpected volume of the request. “I mean…. Yes, I do want a hug. Just… I need to prepare!” Stede seemed to snap out of his stupor and was immediately rushing off. He made it all the way around the corner before seemingly remembering that you’re still there and excitedly peeked his head back out of his cabin with a huge smile. “Come back to my cabin in two hours! After dinner, alright?” You nodded. Stede grinned wider somehow. “Great! Fantastic! That’s… Great!! See you soon! Toodle-loo!”
Then he fully disappeared into his cabin leaving you standing on the deck, very confused. “Okay?” You mumbled, more to yourself than anything else. “Okay.”
Two hours later you found yourself standing at the door of the captain’s cabin. You weren’t really sure how to prepare for a hug but you had changed into something softer than your usual sturdy clothes. You weren’t really nervous per se. You doubted you could mess this interaction up so badly you’d get hurt (not physically at least, that wasn’t Stede’s style) but it was very strange. Then again, having Stede as a captain had generally been really strange. He didn’t really act like any captain you’d served under or even any you’d heard about.
You took a moment to compose yourself, then knocked on the door. Then almost jumped out of your skin when the door opened almost immediately and without any warning. Had Stede been standing just inside the door?
“Ah! Y/N! Good to see you! Come on in!” He beamed, smiling brightly as he quickly ushered you inside. You couldn’t help but notice that he’d changed out of the bright blue suit he’d been wearing earlier into something that looked more like pajamas with a very soft looking golden banyan on top. (Admittedly you had also changed, though it had been mostly in order to save Stede’s fancy clothes from getting dirty.) Being in the captain's cabin was still odd. You felt so terribly out of place amongst all the finery.
“I made tea!” Stede explained excitedly, passing you a small but gorgeous porcelain tea cup. With Stede looking at you almost expectantly you took a quick drink and found it was actually really good. “ It’s chamomile. Supposedly helps you relax!” He explained before quickly, going into a really unnecessarily ramble about that particular kind of tea and where he got it.
You listened politely, regardless, letting him ramble for a bit and took note of the fact that he was very rapidly drinking his own tea, downing gulps like a drunk in a bar.
After he seemed to finish his rant, you were about to say something, but we’re very quickly interrupted when he decided to run off to his closet. At this point you were so used to Stede’s strangeness that you didn’t even blink at the fact that he had a secret closet. He emerged moments later holding armfuls of banyans and robes. “Oh! You can borrow one of these if you’d like!”
You gently set down your tea cup and looked at the fabric Stede was holding. All of it seemed incredibly soft and comfortable but also expensive. “Are you sure you don’t mind if I borrow one?” You were already gently holding onto one, a soft ocean blue one with subtle details, but you had to double check. That one article of clothing was more expensive than anything else you owned.
“Of course! You’re more than welcome to!” Stede smiled as he spoke. “I mean, I’ll admit I’m a bit of a clotheshorse and I can hardly wear them all at once!” He gently took the robe from you and draped it over your shoulders, still smiling.
Stede immediately jumped into another monologue. You couldn’t help but notice that it seemed more stilted than usual. Sure he talked a lot, but it was usually some kind of passion behind what he was saying but he seemed very nervous. It sounded oddly formal.
When he paused, you finally got the courage to say something, “Stede, are you doing alright? You seem kind of nervous. We talk things through…” you prompted.
“… as a crew.” Stede seemed happily surprised by you using his own catch phrase against him. But he sighed, busying himself by refilling his own cup and topping yours off. “I suppose I did get a tad carried away. I’m not quite sure myself what one does before a hug… I wouldn’t know…”
That made you stare. What? Stede, the guy who’d gotten you a care package when you joined his crew, who’d been so eager to invite you into his luxurious cabin and who (despite his lack of experience) clearly cared about his crew, had never been hugged?
He seemed to notice your surprise. “I’m aware it sounds odd. You see in the circles I’ve lived in my whole life it’s been seen as rather improper.” He sounded almost ashamed, like a part still thought it was improper. “Not that I had many friends, even if it wasn’t…” He was breaking your heart out here. Stede took a deep breath. “ I’m sure I’ve already fumbled this. This is ridiculous. I-I’m so sorry for wasting your time.”
You were quick to jump in to comfort him. “Hey no, don’t worry you haven’t messed anything up nor have you wasted my time.” You gave him your best comforting smile. “ Besides we’re pirates, and last I checked, pirates don’t care what’s improper.” He gave you such a soft hopeful look that you had to keep talking. “Honestly, I’m kind of looking forward to whatever you have planned.”
He looked up at you with huge puppy dog eyes. “Well, then.” His voice cracked a little bit but he continued confidently anyway. Quickly jumping to his feet and offering you his hand. “I can hardly disappoint you at this point can I?”
You smiled. “Would be rather rude to do so, yes.” You replied as he took your hand and pulled you up. He sat down on the bed and patted the mattress next to him. Stede’s bed was undoubtedly the softest thing you’d ever touched in your life and it took self control to not sink into it.
After a pause, Stede chimed in with a strained but chipper, “So! Hugs? What… erm… How does one go about that?”
You smiled. “Well, may I take the lead, Captain?”
“By all means!” Stede seemed nervous but was still smiling.
You adjusted a little then gently pulled him into your arms. He tensed, his own hands resting against your back as little as possible. You were a little caught off guard by how strong Stede’s whole body felt, with how clumsy he usually was and how many layers he normally wore, you’d never noticed. You feel him relax. After a moment or two he breathed a deep sigh of relief and just melted into your arms, holding onto you tighter, not enough to be uncomfortable.. You realize that you’ve been running your hand up and down Stede’s back the whole time. You consider stopping but he hasn’t said anything about it so you don’t.
“This…” Stede mumbles into your shoulder and if he wasn’t so close you definitely wouldn’t have heard it. “This is very nice.” He hummed in contentment, rubbing his face against your shoulder.
After a nice long hug he pulls away. He’s smiling and his hair is a bit messy. It actually looks really cute on him. “Thank you!” He pats you twice on the back, probably a bit harder than he meant to, considering that you stumble a tad and almost fall in his lap. “Eek! Sorry!” He apologizes immediately, clearly looking concerned.
You laughed a little. “Of course, happy to help, captain!”
“Stede, call me Stede.” He said quickly, eyes widening as he said it.
You smiled. “Well then, thanks for all this,” You motioned at the banyan and the cabin in general. “Thanks for the lovely hug, Stede.”
He beamed wider than you’d ever seen. “Of course! I’m glad I didn’t mess it up.” He was almost sheepish.
“I’m no hug expert, in fact I doubt that exists, but I can say that it was a very good one.” You complimented. Stede puffed his chest out a little, clearly proud of himself. “Just say the word if you’d like to do this again.”
“Of course! Have a lovely night, Y/N!” You nodded and stood, already slipping the banyan off. “No, no.” Stede fussed standing alongside you and gently moving the fabric back in place. You raised a brow. “Keep it.”
You stared, stunned, as you toyed with the end of one of the sleeves. It was incredibly soft and comfortable. “I… Are you sure?” You could tell that just this one garment was worth more than everything else you owned combined. It was shocking enough that he let you borrow it but now he was letting you keep it?
“Yes, of course! It suits you incredibly well.” Stede patted you on the shoulder. “I insist!” His voice wasn’t commanding but you could tell that he wasn't going to take no for an answer. It was a very nice banyan.
You smiled. “Thank you. I really appreciate it.” You made your way across the captain’s cabin, clutching your new banyan to yourself tightly. “Good night, cap- erm… Good night, Stede.” You fumbled, all your instincts telling you to call him captain.
Despite that, Stede didn’t seem annoyed. He simply waved. “See you tomorrow.”
“Of course! See you tomorrow.” You closed the door to the cabin carefully, not wanting to make too much noise and risk waking anyone. Luckily the crew was all asleep already so you wouldn’t have to explain why you were wearing the captain’s clothes sneaking out of the captain’s cabin after dark. The jokes that Lucius would make… But you could see him, fast asleep against Black Pete’s side. The only one awake was Buttons, who gave you a nod of acknowledgement which you returned (while keeping your gaze averted), and you doubted he’d care.
You made your way back to your cabin. You hadn’t expected to have your own cabin but the ship was huge and Stede was Stede so you ended up with one. It was definitely nice to have your own space. You gently took the banyan off and folded it nicely (even rubbing the spot on your desk where you were planning on placing it down as if to clean it). Sleepily, you changed into your sleepwear and almost collapsed when your attention was pulled back to the soft fabric on your desk. Before you could talk yourself out of it, you grabbed it and put it on before climbing into bed.
As you got comfortable, you realized that everything smelled nice. Like a soft but not overpowering floral smell. You confirmed your suspicions when you sniffed the banyan. It smelled like flowers.
You smiled and fell asleep surrounded by the smell.
#ofmd x reader#ofmd#ofmd stede#stede bonnet x reader#our flag means death#our flag means death x reader
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Hi! How are you? Would it be okay if I request a platonic headcanon where Zoro, Marco, and Sanji (separately, you also don't have to do all three if you don't want to! Wasn't sure if you had a character limit) reaction to them overhearing the reader and the readers s/o fighting and the readers s/o slaps the reader? Thank you in advance!
Zoro, Marco, and Sanji when your S/O hits you during an argument
Hope you enjoy this anon! Sorry about confusing you with the character limit, I usually don't mind how many characters you request as long as it's not a ridiculous amount :)
Rules
Word Count: 0.7k
Spoilers: None
Zoro
He doesn't pay any attention to you both when you start arguing
He finds it slightly annoying since he's probably trying to take a nap
You guys decided to start fighting right in the middle of the deck
everyone else on the crew had left to get supplies for the next island, leaving you three alone
Zoro's in between you two the second he hears you get hit
He doesn't say anything to you s/o, just glares at them with one hand on his swords
He and you are pretty close so you can bet he's pissed
He thought of cutting their hand off, and if you weren't standing right there, he probably would've
He isn't all too good at comforting people so all you're really gonna get is an awkward pat on the back and questionable advice
He'll sit with you for as long as you need though
If you break up with them, he'll threaten them
full on like "I'll kill you"
He takes his friend's well-being seriously, and if this really seemed to put you off, then he'd be more than willing to go the extra mile
If you stay together then he'll just be REALLY passive aggressive
Might trip them randomly, but if it didn't seem to affect you too much, he'll leave it be
ridiculously petty about it all so be ready for that
Marco
Starts eavesdropping the second he hears you two arguing
I imagine him to be such a sucker for drama
He feels like he's gotta play the 'older brother' role with you as well, so technically he's obligated to stick around to make sure everything's alright
The second your s/o hits you, he's in the middle of you both restraining their arms
pretty easily at that, Marco is absolutely overpowering them
He might accidentally burn their wrists depending on how mad he is
he's pretty calm, so I don't imagine it would be too bad of a burn, but it'd be enough to get the point across
Snitches to Whitebeard
Marco makes sure you're good once the heat of the moment kinda dies out
If you stay with them, he probably asks how you're doing almost every day to make sure you're not getting abused
He'll be a little less petty than Zoro but still very passive towards them
If he ever hears they hit you again, you're s/o is getting kicked off the ship
If you break up, then Whitebeard's kicking him off
Or they'll kick themselves off by how cold Marco acts towards them
Sanji
He's in the middle of it before they hit you
He's already trying to deescalate the fight before it can reach that stage
But when he turns his back for a second and they hit you, bro will start beating them
absolutely knocks your s/o out
Although, if your s/o is a girl he'll push her back a little, stopping her from getting anywhere close to you
when he sees you shaking on the ground in shock and in tears he stops what he's doing and immediately kneels down beside you
he'll gently guide you to the kitchen, where he'll lock the door to prevent your s/o from getting in and make you some sort of tea
Like one of those teas meant for relaxing
comforts you
He'll get a blanket and ask if you're ok
He's probably apologizing for letting his guard down and letting them hit you
If you stay with them, he'll constantly start fights
like the fights, he starts with Zoro but 10x worse
If your s/o is a girl he'll act a little stand-offish
He isn't flirting or being overly nice, just polite
Either gender I could see him "accidentally" making food they don't like
If you break up with them he's making sure they feel like shit
How dare they hit you? someone so close to him?
He's acting the same as before if your s/o is a girl, with side comments here and there about the incident
would internally feel so relieved if/when they leave
#zoro#zoro op#zoro one piece#roronoa zoro#one piece#one piece fanfiction#one piece headcanons#op comfort#one piece comfort#marco op#marco one piece#sanji op#sanji one piece#vinsmoke sanji#zoro headcanons#sanji headcanons#marco headcanons
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Personal Protection Squad - Jim Kirk x Reader
Anonymous said: Prompt: Kirk having a huge crush on the reader, who is close friends with many on the bridge and on the enterprise. Due to his womanizer reputation (and because they fear Kirk might break her heart) the crew, specially Bones, Spock, Chekov and Sulu (honestly, the man has a sword and knows how to use it), run interference in what Scotty has dubbed "the cockblock brigade"
a/n: let me just say how much I LOVE this request, been working on this for SO long and I’m super in love with it and I hope you are too!!
warnings: some language, some threats made
reader is described as: female. no size, skin, or hair descriptors.
Jim Kirk knew he was in deep as soon as he laid eyes on you, the day you joined the crew. He would pass you in the corridors of the ship and you would smile politely, he would see you in engineering, or in medbay.. Now, he watches as you throw your head back with laughter pouring from your mouth, a few tables away in the mess hall of the Enterprise.
His gaze doesn’t go unnoticed by his friends as they join him at the table. Bones turns his head towards you, sitting with Sulu and Chekov, laughing at something Hikaru had said. He shares a look with the Vulcan beside him before they both turn back to their Captain across the table.
The two officers distract Jim long enough for Chekov and Sulu to leave the mess with you. Jim and Spock make their way back to the bridge and Bones back to medbay to go on with their days. Though Jim doesn’t stop thinking of you, just like every other day.
His feelings for you have grown, despite someone seemingly always interrupting your short but lovely conversations. One time, he had been sitting with you in the mess, having a wonderful time together when Scotty had come and quite literally pulled him away.
Another time, you had been sharing a turbolift and as soon as the doors opened, Bones had come in and whisked you away, muttering something about needing to do your annual check-up.
Little does Jim know, this is all intentional. Ever since they realized Jim had a crush on you, the crew of the Enterprise has been working hard to keep the Captain away from you.
Jim wasn’t the only one who took an immediate liking to you when you came aboard the ship. You made fast friends with almost every member of the crew, which is why some of them have now taken it upon themselves to protect you from their Captain.
Scotty has even taken to calling their little group the “Cockblock Brigade”.
They all cared for you too much to let Jim break your heart, so they became your own personal protection squad, and they hoped neither you or Jim would become wise to their actions.
But they weren’t very subtle, and you weren’t stupid; so it only took a few weeks of certain people always popping into your conversations with Jim for you to notice the pattern.
As soon as you realized, you sent Jim a message to meet you at a time and place none of your friends would know about.
He arrived on the deck named in the aforementioned message, looking down at his PADD to confirm the location, then glancing around in search of the person who had sent it.
As he takes a hesitant step down the corridor, a sudden tap on his shoulder makes him jump in surprise.
He turns to find you standing behind him, an amused smile on your lips at his tiny jump, and a matching smile replaces the shocked look previously on his face.
“Hello,” he says with a smile, before you place your finger to your lips and shush him. He raises an eyebrow at your action but obliges as your hand finds his wrist and you pull him into a storage room.
“Okay, I think it’s safe here.” you say after looking around the room.
“Safe? Are we in an old spy movie?” Jim asks with a laugh.
At the semi-serious look on your face, his laughter stops.
“What? Why all the secrecy?” he asks.
You sigh, gesturing for him to sit down beside you on a crate of supplies. “We’re being watched. I didn’t know if you had noticed.” Jim still looks confused so you carry on, “Scotty, Bones, Sulu, Chekov, Spock. They’re trying to keep us away from each other. Haven’t you noticed them constantly interrupting our conversations?”
Jim opens his mouth to speak but stops and thinks back on just a few occasions in the past few weeks. He gasps when the realization hits him, “You’re right!”
“I know!”
You share a look before both bursting into laughter at the thought of your friends scheming to keep you apart.
You quickly shush him though, still on high alert and concerned that your nosey friends may find you before you get to say what you need to.
“So I think I’ve figured out why our conversations conveniently are interrupted by the same set of people,” you start, pausing to gauge Jim’s reaction, hoping for some sign that he gets where you’re going with this.
“Go on..” he prods.
“I think they figured out I have a slight crush on you.” you muse, looking anywhere but your captain’s face as your face and neck get hot with embarrassment and anxiety.
Jim inhales so fast that he chokes on the air and starts coughing. You turn to him with wide and slightly amused eyes as he hacks away, slapping his own chest a few times.
“You alright there?” you ask, a joking tone to your voice as he finally catches his breath.
“Yep. Yep.. I am great. One lung short now but that’s fine.” he answers. You laugh softly as his face turns even redder. He clears his throat, “I just didn’t expect you to say that.”
“I hope you’re not about to make fun of me Kirk.”
“No, no. Of course not.” he rushes out, “I just... I didn’t think that you... I thought that you wouldn’t like me back.”
“Well why wouldn’t-” you start defensively before realizing what he said. “You’re not... you like me too?”
“From the first time we met.” he says sheepishly with a dopey smile on his face.
You return the smile and your confidence finally comes back, “Well, I think you better ask me on a date then.”
__
The next few weeks are spent going on secret dates with Jim, sneaking around the ship and avoiding your protection squad at all costs.
When you’re finally comfortable with telling them about it, you and Jim decide to have a little fun.
You find them all sitting together in a near empty mess hall and join them at the table. They all greet you warmly and you join the conversation.
As planned, Jim arrives 5 minutes later and suddenly the empty seat to your right is taken by Scotty who moved from across the table, faster than you have ever seen him move.
Jim is not deterred and taps Scotty on the shoulder. Scotty turns to him, trying and failing to keep his expression neutral and act like he hadn’t just randomly sprinted to get to that seat. “Yes, Captain?”
“Could I sit there Scotty?”
“Oh is it your seat now? I suppose since you’re the Captain you think you just own everything on the ship aye? Well let me tell you something laddie-”
“I’d just like to sit next to my girlfriend Mr. Scott.” Jim says with an innocent smile.
Scotty ignores this as he continues his tirade about Jim thinking he is “hot shit”.
“I maintain this ship with my blood, sweat, and tears-” Scotty suddenly stops. He gulps before turning to look at you and then back to Jim before looking at Bones, “Did he say what I think he said?”
“I think he did.” Bones replies, glaring at Jim.
“Geez Bones, if looks could kill…” Jim smirks at the doctor.
“Looks might not be able to but my sword sure can.” Sulu answers, giving an equally menacing glare to Jim.
You let out a laugh at that and the cockblock brigade seems to remember you are there as they all turn to look at you with sad expressions.
“Y/N darlin’-” Bones starts but you cut him off.
“Listen, as adorable as I think it is that you all wanted to look out for me like this, I am actually capable of making my own decisions. And I have decided that I want to be with Jim. We’ve been hanging out for a couple weeks now and I think it’s going really well..” you trail off, looking to Jim for confirmation to which he smiles and nods, “So thank you all but.. we’re okay. The cockblock brigade can retire.”
You give Scotty a teasing look when you mention his name for the group, he sheepishly smiles in response.
“Alright, we’ll leave ya be lass.” Scotty gets up to move back to his original seat and stops to glare at Jim, “But you listen here.. if you ever hurt her, we’re all coming for you. Aye?” he gestures to the others and Jim receives a glare and nod from each one.
Jim smiles, “I promise you Scotty, if I ever do hurt her, I will gladly let you hurt me. Because that is the last thing I ever want to do.”
The group nods, seeming satisfied with his response, and finally you are allowed to have a conversation with your friends and Jim at once.
And once they see you together, your friends realize they may have done more harm than good by keeping you apart for so long.
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Edited/Traced Bases by SelenaEde
~~~
Morning Dove - She/Her(Flurry Heart)
Eldest daughter of the princess of Love, Morning Dove was practically perfect in every way - including her alicorn status from birth. The first known alicorn born in Equestria, Dove needed a lot of extra care to prevent too many accidents. With all of the ponies doting on her wing and hoof, most would've assumed she would become self-centered and spoiled - but there was no assumption further from the truth.
She became a spokes-pony for those less fortunate, urging her family and the other princesses to provide them aid whenever needed. She began traveling Equestria in her teens - accompanied by a small crew of royal guards of course - to learn all she could about the beings across the country. At the same time, she continued to study from her mother about her future duties as the Crystal Princess. Her empathy and selflessness became known all across Equestria. She would give herself for anyone, no matter how much of a stranger they would be to her.
While on her travels, Dove met a pony who introduced her to the Punk style, and she found herself entranced. This pony soon became a dear friend whom she would keep in contact with after leaving their hometown - now sporting the ring and silver piercing courtesy of her new friend. When she returned home for the holidays, she requested a piercer be employed either in town or in the castle. Cadence was rather taken aback, but not angry. It was an odd request, but she obliged.
Before long, Dove had requested her mane cut (shown above but originally shorter) and gotten several more piercings. Shining Armor was actually against the changes, finding this "phase" of Dove's to seem like a rebellion against her parents. While he still is, he keeps it mostly to himself. He thought she was changing too much about herself, wanting to act as though she wasn't a princess, as though she wasn't their child. This drove a rift between Dove and Shining, but they stay polite to one another. Cadence and Twilight have been trying to get Shining to see reason, but he's adamant for one reason or another.
Dove absolutely adores her younger siblings, especially pleased to have both a unicorn sibling to practice magic with, and a pegasus sibling to fly with. She's been able to spend more time with Hyacinth in recent years, and they've grown quite close. Hyacinth usually finds themself going to Dove with questions rather than their parents. Skylark is fairly shy around Dove, as he is most ponies he doesn't immediately recognize. Dove was gone on her travels for quite some time after Skylark was born, so he didn't get to see her in his early years. She cried when she realized there was no way for her to see his first Hearthswarming Eve.
Hyacinth - He/She/They
Hyacinth was nothing but surprises - Cadence wasn't aware she was pregnant until her primary doctor noted her weight gain, the foal came quite early, and was born nearly pitch black with stubbly ice-pink hair. After the first few days of monitoring in the hospital, Hyacinth's coat started to lighten and darker pink hair was spotted on their head. Soon, he was found to be a beautiful rich blue matching his father's mane. Still, the damage was done - reporters had already shared gossip pieces about Cadence.
"The Princess of Love a CHEATER? New Foal Looks NOTHING LIKE HUSBAND!" with pictures of Hyacinth in the hospital before their coat lightened.
Anyone who knew Cadence was certain she hadn't cheated, but ponies would occasionally whisper to one another even after all three other princess and Shining Armor himself had attempted to put an end to the false rumors.
Because of all this, Hyacinth was kept at the castle for a lot of her childhood. He was perfectly content with this however, as once he learned to read, books became a dear friend. She was like a sponge, soaking up as much knowledge as possible about as many different topics as possible. When Shining noticed the similarities between Hyacinth and Twilight, he made sure to send her a letter, both finding it funny and requesting she visit soon to help Hyacinth make new friends in the Empire.
They found themself close friends with a pair of twins who adored books just as much as they did. He would often invite the two of them over for group reading and discussion on their latest book. This would also cause Hyacinth to find a close friend in her cousin Star Spark, who was just as enamored with books - though more privately. Spark was full of stories, and "Cousin Cin" was always available to listen to him prattle on for an hour or more.
Due to their shared interest in learning, Dove became Hyacinth's closest friend. Dove always brought back stories of her travels, and of course the occasional gift would always include a new book for her sibling as well. When it came to Skylark, Hyacinth finds him fascinating - he was an introduction to a whole new form of information to them. Prior to Cadence's pregnancy with Lark, neither parent felt prepared to teach Hyacinth about reproduction - however the questions came very soon after they told her they were expecting a new foal. Cadence relented, and allowed him to speak with both her and the resident doctors for any medical questions they had.
Hyacinth found themself enamored with the medical information, and soon had requested Auntie Twilight send them as many medical books as possible. After confirming with Cadence and Shining, she obliged. Hyacinth found themself buried up to their chin in medical books, and soon began perusing them in the order Twilight recommended. It was the most interesting information he had read about - he would later earn his (not shown) cutie mark while studying with the resident nurses and doctors, and planned to pursue a path in medicine.
Skylark - He/They
Skylark ended up being another enigma foal, with a dusty brown coat and nearly white eyes. Lots of testing was done once he opened his eyes, as everyone wanted to make sure he wasn't born blind. While it was found that he wasn't blind, they were sure his vision was very sensitive and he could need glasses once he got older.
However, because of his appearance, the rumors started up once again accusing Cadence of cheating. Some articles even suggested it was Flash Sentry that was the real father of Skylark. Despite their best efforts, these rumors reached Cadence, and it hurt her a lot to read them. She found herself wanting to distance herself from Lark, but Shining was sure to remind her that not only did he know Lark was his, he was certain she would be the most important pony in Lark's life.
Lark is still fairly young, and hasn't shown much interest in anything yet. For him, the most fun thing right now is flying with his Momma and "big sissy Dove". It usually takes quite some time for him to recognize Dove, due to his eyesight, but he adores her nonetheless. They're very shy and somewhat nervous around ponies they don't recognize, so ponies will more often than not find Lark hiding behind his parents or Hyacinth until they recognize anyone.
They've become friends with a housemaid's filly who's about the same age as them, and can sometimes be heard running around the castle with her. Neither of them cause much trouble, but both are very prone to exploration.
Everyone hopes that soon Lark will show more interest in something, so they may have a clue as to what his talent will be.
~~~
AUGH THIS TOOK SO LONG
No cutie marks because I'm lazy and wasn't exactly sure what to make any of the kid's talents. Now that I've written about them some, I have a better idea for the two oldest.
I thought it would be interesting however to include a small "celebrity status" thing for these two, since pony genetics are a mystery and could lead to all sorts of issues when a foal looks almost entirely unlike one or both parents. Dove is the only one that ponies outside of the family are 100% certain is the pair's foal. However, all three of them are full-blood siblings, no infidelity to be found. Cadence may be polyamorous herself, but Shining Armor isn't, and she respects that 😌
#mlp#mlpfim#mlp fim#my little pony#my little pony gen 4#princess cadence#princess cadance#shining armor#flurry heart#mlp next gen#flurry heart redesign#Jesterday#art#base edit#next generation#next gen mlp
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Reviewing Star Trek TNG - S4E7 "Reunion"
I really need to start getting these out in a somewhat timely fashion again.
Also, you have no idea how much of a ball ache it was to find images for this review when searching "Star Trek TNG Reunion" kept bringing up news about Picard season 3.
THE PREMISE
Ambassador K'Ehleyr (Suzie Plakson again) returns to the Enterprise to inform Captain Picard that Klingon Chancellor K'mpec (Charles Cooper) has been poisoned and suspects that one of the two candidates for succession, Duras (Patrick Massett again) and Gowron (Robert O'Reilly) is responsible. As his dying wish, he asks Picard to become the Arbiter of Succession and identify the assassin.
Meanwhile, she brings with her a Klingon boy named Alexander (Jon Paul Steuer). After his previous romantic experiences with her, Worf suspects that the boy may be his son...
MY REVIEW
It only took them four seasons to realise that they should start reusing their wealth of interesting side characters. Better late than never.
I think Worf being the stoic, manly man of the crew makes it all the funnier when he absolutely bricks it at the sight of his ex.
Picard: Lieutenant, please receive our guest.
Worf: Captain, I must request permission to send another officer.
Picard: May I know your reason?
Worf: ...My dishonour among Klingons may offend Ambassador K'Ehleyr.
Yeah, I'm sure that's the only reason.
Picard: Lieutenant, you are a member of this crew, and you will not go into hiding whenever a Klingon vessel uncloaks.
That's a fancy way of saying "stop being a little bitch and just talk to your ex already."
Given her established disregard for Klingon tradition, K'Ehleyr obviously doesn't care about Worf's discommendation, and during their conversation she pretty much confirms that Alexander is indeed Worf's child, the product of that one time they went to pound town on the holodeck.
So... Alexander was conceived near the end of season 2, and here we are in the early stages of season 4 and he's like six years old. How much time passes between seasons?!
Anyway, as the only Klingon child on board, Alexander naturally has difficulty fitting in, almost getting into a fight with the other children before Worf intervenes. Their conversation both reinforces Michael Dorn as an absolute WALL of a human being and also reveals that Alexander *gasp* doesn't actually WANT to be a warrior!
Worf is naturally outraged, but I guess this is what happens when a Klingon has a mother who doesn't give two shits about Klingon tradition, which is a convenient excuse for why Worf (and the audience) is only just finding out about Alexander's existence, since Worf would've insisted that he and K'Ehleyr take the vow of marriage if he had known beforehand. Cue more debates about tradition vs humanity, with Worf refusing to reveal himself as Alexander's father for fear of harming the boy's future.
But we don't have time to unpack all of that. We need to get back to Klingon politics! Otherwise known as more buff dudes in black leather talking about honour and glory and other such junk.
As can be expected, Worf is against Duras leading the Klingon Empire after the little incident of trying to get him and Picard killed, but he seems to immediately dismiss Gowron as a suspect?
Hmm, a mysterious outsider who you've never met, frequently disagrees with the council and who looks like he'd eat a baby if you dared him to?
Yep. No cause for concern there. Good call, Worf.
We get another Klingon ritual of Gowron and Duras tasing K'mpec's body to make sure he's really dead (I don't fucking know, just go with it), but it's interrupted by an explosion in the assembly hall, leaving two Klingon meatbags dead. While Picard and K'Ehleyr are safe, they decide to use an older form of the ceremony to draw out the proceedings and create enough time for a proper investigation, beginning with a forensic analysis of the explosion.
After a couple of scenes to pad the runtime - Worf and K'Ehleyr apparently confirm that they're really in love and nearly bone again before having another fucking debate (and I don't mean that literally), K'Ehleyr tries to find out why Worf was discommended and Worf teaches Alexander how to use a Bat'leth (the weapon's very first appearance) - we're finally ready to move the plot forward again: the forensic tests have determined that the bomb was Romulan in design.
DRAMATIC CHORDS! COMMERCIAL BREAK!
Don't worry, we're not throwing a third suspect into the mix this late in the game. Though this does imply a secret alliance between the Klingons and the Romulans which could majorly screw over the Federation, so there's that. It's later revealed that one of Duras' men had the bomb implanted in his arm, so the whole thing was an inside job.
Look, I'm sorry if it sounds like I'm skimming over stuff here, but all these Klingon succession proceedings just aren't all that interesting. Duras and Gowron don't show any personality aside from being the same generic shouty men we've seen many times before. Hell, if Gowron didn't have his trademark murder eyes, I'm not even sure if anyone would remember him.
Meanwhile, K'Ehleyr goes through Worf's personal logs (which she's apparently allowed access to - great work, Mr Chief of Security) and finds out that Duras was responsible for Worf's discommendation and (rather idiotically) makes it clear to Duras that she knows.
A scene or two later, Worf and Alexander come along and find her covered in blood and bleeding out, living just long enough to tell her that Duras pulled an offscreen stabby-stabby and heavily implying to Alexander that he and Worf have a connection.
Then Alexander watches his estranged father scream in anguish over his mother's mangled corpse, followed by Worf telling him to remember the sight and stay in the same room as it. Nice going, Worf. I’m sure he’ll remember that in therapy.
It's a shame that K'Ehleyr was killed off so soon. I would've liked to see more of her.
Understandably pissed off, Worf arms up with a Bat'leth and beams over to Duras' ship to get revenge, exploiting some loophole that allows him to claim vengeance for a loved one's death. One bland action scene later, Riker and Data arrive just in time to see Worf murder Duras, getting his revenge but also killing the only person who knows the truth about what happened at Khitomer.
Obviously Picard doesn't take too kindly to one of his senior crew murdering someone, and gives him the usual "I understand why you did it, but cut that shit out" reprimand. As for Alexander, Worf confirms that he is his father sends him to live with his own human parents on Earth, reasoning that Alexander deserves a proper upbringing from someone who will be able to raise him properly. That definitely won't come back to bite him in both dicks a few years down the line.
As for the whole murder mystery thing, it never really gets resolved and we never find out who killed K'mpec in the first place. But since there are no other challengers present (I'm not even sure how the challenging system works), Gowron just... gets the throne by default? And everyone seems fine with that? Sure, fuck it.
As a whole, this episode is... fine. It's not a bad episode, just one that I've mostly seen before. I'm not against the idea of Worf having a son, but for the most part Alexander is just kinda... there. It feels like nobody knew how to make it interesting, but they kept it anyway to give this episode some much-needed flavour.
6/10 - Adequate.
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#star trek#star trek tng#star trek the next generation#captain picard#uss enterprise#star trek worf#klingons#gowron#klingon empire#klingon culture#will riker#geordi la forge#star trek data#k'ehleyr#star trek review#star trek tng review#murder mystery
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Here’s a little thing I wrote over a year ago that I think is still okay. Yes, the astronaut is named after Zorian Kazinksi from Mother of Learning.
As The Red Dust Settles
Silence. Everything was silent. There were no sounds. Nothing that could bother the creature. No speech, no laughter, no pain, no music. Just rocks moving and roaring wind, and the creature quite liked it that way.
Then they came. The sounds of whirring motors, turning gears, beeping lights, and even a robotic voice every once in a while. The sound of rovers, scanning the land, moving across the rocks.
‘It's a bit loud, but it's not that bad,’ the creature reasoned. ‘Besides, some of the noises can even be quite soothing.’ So the creature went back to sleep, content in the fact that even though the noises are annoying, they aren’t nearly disturbing enough for the creature to move.
But the noises got louder. And louder. Suddenly there were other beings on the red surface of Mars, and with them came even louder and more diverse noises. More machines, flowing water, people screaming, talking, crying, singing. The sounds of tunnels being dug, of homes being built, of roads being paved, and of crops being planted. More and more sounds filled the air as humans slowly began to make a home for themselves, and the creature was not pleased.
The creature tried to get them to leave. It changed the land, created more storms, and poisoned the water. It destroyed buildings, ruined plots of crops, and killed off livestock. But no matter what the creature did, the humans stayed and changed things. They moved things around, building structures and generally making nuisances out of themselves.
‘Alright,’ the creature fumed. ‘Enough is enough. I have tried to be polite, I have tried to ignore the awful screeching they make. I have tried to let them do what they want and I’ve tried to warn them, but it is time I get rid of them. Besides, a little nourishment every once in a while will be good for me.’
“Kazinski,” the operator called, “are you there?”
“I’m here, operator.”
“How much progress have you made on the colonization of Mars?”
“We have made significant progress in the last few months, though many buildings have been destroyed due to the frequent earthquakes this planet has.. If we keep on going at this pace, even civilians might be able to join us in a few years.”
“Sounds good. I expect a more in depth report at a later date.”
“Understood.”
“Has the weather changed in recent times?”
“The weather seems to have gotten worse recently, but we are unsure if this is permanent.”
“Understood. I will make a note of this. Any other significant reports?”
“We are requesting more water, livestock and seeds. The earthquakes have torn up many plots of land, and there is something in the air that kills off livestock and poisons the water.
“I will make note of it. Anything else?”
“Nothing pressing.”
“Good. Then-” Then, the operator heard rumbling from the other side of the connection. “Kazinski, what is that rumbling?”
“I’m not sure. The ground seems to be moving, and not like tearing either. It’s almost like a wave.”
The operator frowned. “Open up a live view of Mars from Earth,” she ordered. Immediately, a projection of Mars appeared. They watched in amazement as the entire planet seemed to move. Suddenly, the operator could hear a scream from the other side of the connection. “Kazinski, what happened over there?”
“It’s almost swallowing us-” The connection was suddenly shut down. The entire crew watched in horror as the entire planet folded in on itself and then settled back into a perfect sphere, leaving no trace that it had ever moved.
#my writing#literature#fiction#original writing#orginal story#creative writing#science fiction#horror?
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497: A Guide To Construction Client Retention
This Podcast Is Episode Number 497, And It's About A Guide To Construction Client Retention
Long-standing customers form the backbone of a robust and well-established business. Make it your mission to ensure that most of your current customers stay with your company for many years.
Understanding the High-Profit Client
Most of them have personality traits commonly known as drivers. Folks accustomed to getting things done quickly and efficiently do not mind paying professionals for servicing, repairing, remodeling, or building new construction projects related to their houses and commercial buildings.
Why it's vital to keep existing customers
Your current customers already have personal experiences dealing with your business and using its services. You won't need to spend much time, money, and energy convincing them to continue hiring you.
You and your staff know your current clients well. They're likely to increase the amount (or the frequency) of their purchases and recommend your business to others if you:
Solve their problems.
Meet their needs.
Exceed their expectations.
According to the US Chartered Institute of Marketing, it costs between four and ten times more to win a new customer than to keep a current customer. Therefore, it's vital to implement outstanding client service to convert occasional customers into loyal, long-standing regulars.
1. Communicate consistently and manage expectations
Let your clients know what they can expect from your business, including timescales.
Ensure emails are clear
Your loyal clients deserve communications that are more personal and less formal. Using impersonal emails for your more extensive email list is fine, but use more personal touches with your best customers.
2. Show your customers you appreciate them
You can show your customers you appreciate them in many different ways, including:
Thank them personally for hiring you. The more special your clients feel, the more likely they will hire you again. They'll appreciate your thoughtfulness and value your service.
Offer your long-term customers bonuses for their loyalty. Giving them a voucher, so they save money the next time. Or a voucher for someone they know who needs your service. It's great to offer new customers rewards and incentives, but that leaves existing customers feeling ignored.
3. Develop customer service standards
Develop customer service standards for your business. You could use some of the following guidelines for your business's customer service standards. Try to:
Be polite, helpful, and friendly to your clients at all times.
Respond to emails as quickly as possible, preferably within three hours but within a maximum of 24 hours.
Listen carefully to questions and requests so that you can offer the most appropriate help or advice.
Inform customers immediately if there's an unexpected delay in processing their requests or implementing change orders.
Train your crew in customer service - everyone in your business who will contact customers should be trained in customer service.
Use your business's customer service standards as a basis for your training. Ensure staff knows precisely what's expected of them when interacting with clients.
4. Deal with customer complaints effectively
Regard each customer complaint as an opportunity rather than an annoyance. This allows you to handle the complaint satisfactorily. If a customer complains, it shows they still care.
Steps to take when a customer complains
Train your staff members to take several steps whenever a customer complains. They should:
Listen carefully to what the customer is saying. Understand exactly what they're complaining about and why.
Admit any mistakes that your business has made and apologize to the customer.
Make amends quickly. If necessary, ask the customer what they would like you to do to remedy the situation.
Promise to do better next time.
Test and improve your business's customer service
There are several ways to find out how well your staff is handling their customer service duties, including:
Asking customers for feedback on how your business could improve its customer services.
Inviting your staff to suggest how your business could treat its customers better.
Use all these ideas to develop and extend your customer service skills. Ensure each employee has ongoing training.
5. Exceed customer expectations
Ways you can exceed your customers' expectations include:
Delivering an excellent product or service. You'll keep customers for life if you exceed their expectations.
Responding quickly to all customer questions, requests, complaints, and other communications.
Training all your staff in excellent customer service skills.
Managing all aspects of a transaction efficiently, from the sale to the delivery to invoicing.
Dealing with complaints quickly and effectively.
Delivering on your promises. Never promise anything that your business can't provide.
Final thoughts
Build relationships with clients and take time to learn more about them. Recommend solutions that address their specific problems. Go the extra mile to show your customers they're important to you. Ask for their input, as well. They'll get to know your products and services and offer insights into what's working and what could be improved. If you engage them--and make changes based on their feedback--you'll develop a loyal customer base.
Encouraging repeat customers makes solid business sense. It's far less expensive to keep an existing customer than to win a new customer. Recognize the value of your customer base and invest in building an exceptional customer experience that will ensure your customers return for many years to come.
About The Author:
Sharie DeHart, QPA, is the co-founder of Business Consulting And Accounting in Lynnwood, Washington. She is the leading expert in managing outsourced construction bookkeeping and accounting services companies and cash management accounting for small construction companies across the USA. She encourages Contractors and Construction Company Owners to stay current on their tax obligations and offers insights on managing the remaining cash flow to operate and grow their construction company sales and profits so they can put more money in the bank. Call 1-800-361-1770 or [email protected]
Check out this episode about Contractors Marketing - Accounting - Production (M.A.P.)!
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